Q&A: Dog Resource Guarding a Family Member

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  • Опубліковано 23 січ 2022
  • Tyler Muto unpacks the relationship/hierarchy issues that could be a root cause when a dog starts to resource guard a member of the household. Resource guarding is one of the most complex behaviors to resolve in dog training, but here, Tyler offers some solutions and practical ideas to set boundaries and change the dynamics in the house.
    This is a clip from one of our Consider the Dog Live Group Coaching Sessions, 1-6-22. These sessions are biweekly and free for members to watch, ask questions, and get real-world trainer’s advice. Our next one is on February 3rd… stay tuned!
    For the rest of this livestream, you can find it here: www.considerthedog.com/progra...
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КОМЕНТАРІ • 59

  • @kellyhorton1462
    @kellyhorton1462 6 днів тому +1

    So we got a rescue that was a bait dog in a dog fighting ring and he's very sweet to me. Is afraid of men some. So he's always been "my dog". He is great with commands during "training time" and behaves better and better around my husband. Little kids are a different story. My nephew's little boy comes over for weekends and we have to keep the gated away from each other. Bravo knows his place and minds very well but after he goes home, Bravo tends to act out and growl at my husband for no reason and guard me. I think I am a dog mommy more than the leader I need to be. Must learn this. TY for putting it in terms I totally understood.

  • @amazoncharlie5087
    @amazoncharlie5087 3 місяці тому +3

    boy, was this a wakeup call. I am EXACTLY what he describes - a doormat! Not just for my foster dog, but also other people in my life. This is the BEST video I've seen and really shows that I need to take control of my LIFE, rather than my life controlling me ESPECIALLY the foster dog who definitely (through no fault of her own) is treating me like a doormat and I'm unknowingly ENCOURAGING her to do that. THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU TYLER!!!!!! Time to set personal boundaries with her AND other people in my life.

    • @briansmith2125
      @briansmith2125 3 місяці тому

      I too share many of these characteristics, (only with the dog I guess) but how to do this effectively?

  • @Texmorg
    @Texmorg Рік тому +8

    This has been very enlightening! Until my current dog, I had never dealt with a true resource guarding dog. Not only did this give me a method to deal with her, but gave valuable insight into the cause (me!) of her behavior.
    To sum up her/my issue, she had gotten hurt as a small puppy, my guilt was great, and I promised her that if she didn’t die, I would never ask as another thing of her. She lived, and for four years I followed through, I REALLY followed through. There were NO boundaries, none. No house training, manners of any sort, anything was allowed, nothing was off limits.
    Then, my grandchildren moved nearby, and I slowly set about correcting all I had messed up. She is now house trained, obedience trained, no longer sleeps in our bed-I had to stop that because she would growl and snap at my husband. We worked hard, and got everything under control except the resource guarding of me, not food, not toys, only me. So began a long unsatisfactory dive into stopping this.
    I have only one question, when I send her off, with authority, does she receive a reward, (petting or treat) when she complies, at least in the early stages?
    Now, for the zinger of this story, I have successfully trained and shown conformation, and obedience, with various breeds, through the years. Even trainers never stop learning!
    Thank you for this video, I am beginning implementation today, wish us luck!

  • @urallineed420
    @urallineed420 Рік тому +2

    Thanks for reinforcing this for me!

  • @huxlju1
    @huxlju1 Рік тому +1

    Super helpful - thank you so much

  • @yesim3219
    @yesim3219 2 дні тому +1

    I have a reactive miniature poodle dog. He is 3 years old and not neutered. He is very smart and adaptable. However, when guests come to the house, he barks a lot, or when someone leaves the room, he jumps on them, sticks to their clothes, and tries to stop them. He only does this when I am in the room. Besides, he does not act like this towards other people or dogs on the street. I have done a lot of reading and watched videos. What most of them suggest seems to be punishment-focused, correcting with a leash seemed a bit logical, but it didn't work for us, he became even more stressed. I try to attract his attention with a reward as soon as he does this behavior, but he doesn't focus on me. Normally, he always looks into my eyes. How can I solve this problem?.

  • @RasheedahsWifeSchool
    @RasheedahsWifeSchool Рік тому +9

    I am not a trainer but I am learning from trainers while helping them with difficult case adult dogs. We encountered one dog of a boyfriend/girlfriend situation. The dog belonged to the bf and the couple did not live together officially but the gf was lately staying over 2-3x per week. Dog was guarding bf an did not allow gf to sit on sofa with him when they watched a movie. BF was perhaps subconsiously encouraging this behavior because he didn't want to get closer to his gf and felt that she was moving in too fast. He didn't feel confident to tell her so he used the dog to do it. I feel that there is little hope for their situation because it was the gf who came to us for help. There is a good chance to fix the problem if the person being guarded is the one who seeks answers. Sometimes unhappy marriages use the guarding dog to maintain physical distance. There is also the potential for the toxic dynamic of the guarded human feeling like the favorite person and so encouraging the guarding at the expense of the dog's relationship with other family members. To me this seems like one of the more challenging things to fix for a dog because it has almost nothing to do with the dog and all to do with the way that the humans in the house interact with and feel about each other, and often they are not willing to be honest about it. Guarding is totally different from true protection. Humans often fool themselves but a guarder will not protect them in the event of actual danger.

    • @BuffaloDogTraining
      @BuffaloDogTraining Рік тому +2

      That is a really insightful interpretation of the situation. Thanks for the comment!

    • @meaganvalenti2946
      @meaganvalenti2946 8 місяців тому +2

      I have this problem in my house for 9 years and I absolutely hate living in the house because of the dog The dog doesn't learn or retain anything she resource guards my husband and it's made me very resentful

    • @RasheedahsWifeSchool
      @RasheedahsWifeSchool 8 місяців тому +1

      @@meaganvalenti2946 does your husband correct the dog? If not, does he understand that it is making you feel unwelcome in your own home?

  • @jessicayanish-dd5dk
    @jessicayanish-dd5dk Рік тому +7

    I am kinda like a door mat but it is like my dogs know that I am vulnerable and they think it's their job to protect me or resource guard me to keep people away from me

    • @ChristopherWalker-je3wi
      @ChristopherWalker-je3wi 18 днів тому

      Well hello I'm really sorry for texting you In such way it's not really cool but I just couldn't help myself you've got a very interesting profile and I must say you're cute♥️♥️♥️

  • @alfredobeten1989
    @alfredobeten1989 2 роки тому +1

    Hello sir i love this video my dog started being aggressive towards other dogs and people randomly and even me when i come towards my housemate its really saddening to see her express so much aggression.

  • @alyssa0411
    @alyssa0411 7 місяців тому +1

    My 9-month-old Chihuahua guards me against my husband and two kids (11 &13) She acts fine towards them when I’m not around but as soon as I come home she changes and turns into a different dog. Lots of growling, barking and very anxious sounding whining towards my family members. She doesn’t like it when anyone touches me or gives me a hug, she will come right over and try to break it up or even get a little nippy towards people’s hands. I have been her primary caregiver for the past 6 months that we have had her. I’m the one who feeds her and I’m the one who is with her during the day while my husband works and the kids are in school. It’s basically a perfect storm for her to see me as her one and only human that she has attached herself to. Her behavior is escalating which is concerning.

  • @Tortellini24
    @Tortellini24 Рік тому +5

    This is the exact issue I'm having with my MIL. She's a very sweet and gentle person in general and my dog is obsessed with her. We have all found it very cute, but she now has escalated this behavior to bringing a toy over to her, leaning against her and growling, almost holding her hostage. What should she do in this situation? Get up and walk away? Can you also explain this food claiming drill you mentioned? I tried looking through your videos but couldn't find this. It sounds like we need to work with her on being more assertive around our dog which is gonna be tough. Any tips or recommendations are welcome!

  • @marakavanaugh6490
    @marakavanaugh6490 7 місяців тому +1

    This is so helpful! I’m realizing that I do not set proper boundaries with my dog. Hence, now creating a behavior of guarding me. Thank you!

  • @Big.Meatyclaw
    @Big.Meatyclaw Рік тому +1

    ill have to try this, my dog guards me when my wife comes into my office, gets between us and side eyes her. do you think moving his bowl out of my office or into her office would help with this too? Thank you! Great video

  • @rubyyehlee
    @rubyyehlee 6 місяців тому

    Hi! Very insightful. What would you say if this only happens to one particular other dog? 99% of the time my dog is chill around other dogs approaching me, but he really doesn’t like this one particular dog who we frequently see.

  • @nathanielwaterfill9748
    @nathanielwaterfill9748 18 днів тому

    Struggling with this w our new gsd puppy guarding our 3 year old daughter.

  • @TheJukeboxhero77
    @TheJukeboxhero77 11 місяців тому +2

    My Amercian Bully has been showing aggression toward the other family dog, but only when I'm there. I'm assuming its very similar to this situation. More boundaries seem to be in order.

  • @melissal8238
    @melissal8238 2 роки тому

    What about dogs that resource guard bones, food, dog bed? I have 2 senior dogs and a EB puppy that is making them miserable. I have tried to be firm with her from the start and work on training her but she is still doing these behaviors.

  • @CAMDEC1217
    @CAMDEC1217 11 місяців тому

    This is great info and likely contributing to my dog's behavior toward my husband. She is resource guarding me and I can do something about it. What would I do in this situation. Dog sleeps in my closet near my bed. When she hears husband in kitchen she races out, sometimes with a growl under her breath. I know she knows it is my husband and essentially warning him. If I am awake and hear it would I just "kick her out" of the bedroom? That means she sleeps out in the living area where my husband is. Just wondering if I am thinking correctly about how to respond to this.

  • @lagottessa
    @lagottessa 2 роки тому +1

    Maybe the number one thing that makes dogs sometimes have an instant respect and kinda admiration for certain people may simply be the natural commanding of personal space that those people exude. Just a thought.

    • @BuffaloDogTraining
      @BuffaloDogTraining 2 роки тому

      Hey there, not sure if you watched the whole video, but that’s essentially what I talk about doing in this video. You are spot on.

    • @lagottessa
      @lagottessa 2 роки тому +2

      @@BuffaloDogTraining watched every second! :-) . Just thinking out loud on how fundamental the very concept of intimate/personal space must be for the relationship between a dog and a human. Why isn't it taught in all puppy classes everywhere?!

  • @christinejones5560
    @christinejones5560 2 місяці тому

    Wow, I really need your advice but I see this video is two years old, I rescued a one year old Shih Tzu very insecure. I keep her on a leash because I have four cats. She is doing excellent with the cats. However, I live in a condo and I made the mistake of letting the dog sleep in the bed, I don’t know if she’s guarding me or the bed, but she constantly barks when the cats come near the bed and which the cats used to sleep in the bed now if I take away the bed and have her start sleeping in the kitchen she will bark excessively and I can’t have that in a condominiumshe does very well if I leave for a few hours but not if she knows I’m home. Any advice would be so terrific. I am really in a bind, and I would really like the cats to sleep in the bed.

  • @tcb4443
    @tcb4443 Рік тому +1

    My daughter just had a baby and her dog sometimes resource guards the newborn.

  • @SueGallon
    @SueGallon Рік тому +1

    My dog resource guards me AND my husband with our other 4 dogs. If we let them all out in the yard for example by themselves they’re fine but the minute one of us walks out he attacks another dog. We don’t know what to do, we got him neutered trying to settle him down and it hasn’t worked. We have to cage him and take turns letting him out to visit us in the house.

    • @sydneyharbour-bridges8090
      @sydneyharbour-bridges8090 Рік тому

      You probably want to see a force free trainer/behaviourist who uses positive reinforcement and is experienced with this.

  • @pinkyxyz123
    @pinkyxyz123 Рік тому +2

    I have a senior chihuahua that has recently started to growl at people while on my lap. I adopted him two weeks ago and he is very sweet to people when on walks. He is also fine when we take him over to someone else’s house. He is very submissive to me when I pet him. This has only started recently and I am having trouble figuring out the actual problem. Maybe he’s worried about his access to affection because he’s a shelter dog and hasn’t had consistent access? And maybe will settle down when he realizes he is staying with us forever? Or is it a true behavioral problem.

    • @MaddieBullock
      @MaddieBullock 3 місяці тому

      I have a ten-year-old chihuahua (two, but Lucky is the anxious one) and he just started guarding my Nana he used to growl at me for coming to pick him up, but now it's gotten worse and I feel bad because I never thought he'd snapped at me before, but now I'm not sure. It makes me sad.

    • @marycapehart5126
      @marycapehart5126 Місяць тому +1

      So I have a dog that I believe resource gaurds me. The issue is I'm the main trainer, caregiver for this dog. He listens to me much more than anyone else in the house. I set boundaries with him and have expectations with him. The person that is on the receiving end of this is my husband. My dog doesn't like us being in the same room for very long before he reverts to a reactive behavior from when he was an abused puppy we rescued. He was kicked regularly by his original owner and when we got him he would lunge and bite at my son and my husband's feet when they walked (especially quickly ) across the floor. I worked very hard to redirect him with positive reinforcement and by teaching him impulse control. The issue is no one else in the house would take the time to work with him. Fast forward several years and my dog is now controlling my husband basically. When ever he gets anxious he starts by spinning, then if we all stay in the same room, he will start to "shark" the other people, then if it stays the same, he will move on to quickly biting at their feet/shoes and it will escalate. His anxiety has progressed as he's gotten older. He is almost 8 and on two different anxiety medications twice a day now. He is a standard bull terrier.
      My dog is basically starting to bully my husband into reacting reacting the way he wants him too. Now if my husband stops petting him before he's ready for him to , he will start obsessively spinning and biting his tail. How am I supposed to fix something that my husband needs to be addressing????? Please and thanks for any advice

  • @amysheetz3031
    @amysheetz3031 7 місяців тому +1

    My 2 and 1/2 year old Cocker Spaniel, Louis resource guards both me and my husband. We cannot even hug without him acting out. He does not guard food or toys. He does guard me, my husband, anything that we accidentally drop, napkins, socks, shoes. His entire demeanor changes and his eyes look crazy. I don't know that my husband's relationship with Louis or my relationship with him is toxic. We are considering training or giving him up and trying to find a single male owner for him. Unfortunately I did not notice these issues when he was just a puppy. We have recently reached out to a training center where he stays there. It cost thousands of dollars, but now I am thinking it won't work with this severe resource guarding issue. Your guidance?

    • @ConsiderTheDog
      @ConsiderTheDog  7 місяців тому

      We have videos at considerthedog.com that can help, plus our private Facebook group where you can ask more detailed questions and even upload video and get feedback from myself and our other instructors. I am sure we can help you make progress, and the membership is only $19.99 which is a lot less than spending thousands! We also are currently running a promotion on the yearly membership option to save 25% with code GRATEFUL
      I hope to see you in the community so we can help you overcome this situation.

  • @shannoncbpref
    @shannoncbpref 9 місяців тому +1

    What about a dog that resource guards me not against other family members, but against the other dogs in the house?

    • @ConsiderTheDog
      @ConsiderTheDog  8 місяців тому

      Hi Shannon, great question! The same info would apply to guarding from the other dogs. Thanks for watching

  • @BrandiSteinbach
    @BrandiSteinbach 6 місяців тому

    I am the weak link I guess. my gsd resume guards me. I have medical issues, and I use him as a support comfort friend. I don't want my husband to be bit. I am the one who trained him. I need help and no one in my area. A vet told me to medicate him!

  • @LethalLavenderxo.
    @LethalLavenderxo. 2 місяці тому

    my mothers dog resource guards my own mother from me and it isnt small she nips me and jumps up at me to keep me away from my mother i cant even hand my mother items i cant have items handed to me. and my mother does nothing to correct the dogs behaviour towards me.

  • @neelafung8787
    @neelafung8787 2 роки тому

    Great advice! For me, this issue started happening recently after our 1.5 year old puppy got neutered. Our behavior with the dog hasn’t changed but he’s a bit possessive over me lately. So it will help if I give him less attention when husband comes home?

  • @TheKensei777
    @TheKensei777 Рік тому +1

    all of this works and i dont see why we should avoid the word "dominance". let's call it what it is, and it works. good video 🤙

    • @BuffaloDogTraining
      @BuffaloDogTraining Рік тому

      100%

    • @prixe12
      @prixe12 Рік тому +2

      Because the dominance theory is based on the outdated wolf dominance theory that has long been perpetuated in dog training circles and has lead to the injury and eventual deaths of countless dogs. Hope this helps ✌️

  • @francis7089
    @francis7089 2 місяці тому

    Jolie guards high value treats

  • @bethanylang1239
    @bethanylang1239 Рік тому

    My dog resource guards me with strangers, he’s even bitten and growls when someone else just talks to him. My dog does respect my bubble and is definitely submissive to me, but he’s very clingy and obsessed with me. I have him do extended stay away from me when he does this. He’ll proceed to growl from across the room. I typically put him in the kennel which is his safe place, so I don’t have another bite incident. He’s also intact still and getting neutered in a week. I’m hoping that helps.

    • @BuffaloDogTraining
      @BuffaloDogTraining Рік тому

      Are you sure it is resource guarding and not insecurity?

    • @bethanylang1239
      @bethanylang1239 Рік тому

      @@BuffaloDogTraining I’m not 100 sure, but friends hug me or talk to me, or come in between us he growls. I’ve tried having them give him treats and that works temporarily but then he runs right to me and sits at my feet and growls at them again. I have a trainer coming after the holidays to do an in home assessment and help. He’s only 1.5 years old.

    • @BuffaloDogTraining
      @BuffaloDogTraining Рік тому

      @@bethanylang1239 how is he around strangers if he’s not next to you? Like if they just try to pet him?

    • @bethanylang1239
      @bethanylang1239 Рік тому +1

      @@BuffaloDogTraining until the last month he was fine, but we don’t have a ton of visitors other than family. People he knows he’s not so bad, but at thanksgiving he even growled at people he knows. My friend that recently visited tried to pet him when he willingly went up to her tail wagging and when she let him sniff her he growled, I wasn’t near him but was in the room.

  • @janelledavault1870
    @janelledavault1870 Рік тому +4

    But I want my dog to snuggle me always… so this is really annoying that to get my dog to not resource guard me I have to limit our relationship. That sounds awful

    • @erinnorwood6124
      @erinnorwood6124 Рік тому +6

      It's better than the dog trying to bite the friends or partner. Check out Victoria Stillwell it's me and the dog where the dog guarded the bed and the partner could've been bitten or the dog that was attacking the partner just because he sat near his wife. It can get serious

    • @erinnorwood6124
      @erinnorwood6124 Рік тому

      It can get bad: ex. ua-cam.com/video/pfkNMeQLLtg/v-deo.html

    • @Smarie39
      @Smarie39 Рік тому

      This is exactly how it has gotten with my GSD. He won’t let anyone near my bed. He has a vicious growl. He never used to but NOONE can enter my room and I am thankful I found this video.

    • @Sara-dp5dg
      @Sara-dp5dg Рік тому +1

      @@Smarie39 my dog has been showing the same behavior and recently nipped at one of my nieces and I don't want a biting incident and have to re-home or put him down. he's been sleeping in my room since he was a puppy. I guess I need to bring the crate out again and try crate training again to let him know my room is my space

    • @thepersonaljo
      @thepersonaljo Рік тому +1

      And thats why you have the problems you have

  • @williamking8085
    @williamking8085 Рік тому

    I like the information, but… way too many commercials.

    • @Datruth431
      @Datruth431 9 місяців тому +2

      It literally had zero commercials. Upgrade my guy

    • @alyssa0411
      @alyssa0411 7 місяців тому +1

      Pay for premium. No commercials before or during the videos.