It's wonderful to listen to you! You've influenced me to speak to "myself" differently and combining yet another perspective to my MANY others. Very helpful as I walk through this journey. You're fucking great Suzanne.
Suzanne is a good expression of the paradox of life. On the one hand she is so normal, down to earth and ordinary and on the other hand she is so special, unique and extraordinary. She is not a teacher and not an authority and yet her words carry a lot of wisdom and truth. This path is so fucking hard, painful and disturbing most of the time but with the likes of Suzanne it is bearable. Much love to all of you ❤️
@@aleksal9132 Dunno if the question was for "me", don't understand youtube notifications. But yes, it is hard. It feels like i am dying. It seems like two realities, one reality where personal me exists, in time, seperate from everyone and everything, in constant fear of death, very heavy for body. Then another reality, no time, no wants, no fears, no "me". Though usually it doesn't last very long, cause of underlying fear and traumas i guess. Hmm, it feels like a endless loop between these realities➰ Hehe, neutrality, or heavy suffering, quite random tbh. Funny thing is, not matter what happens or what we do, the "me dies" i guess. Before body dies, or the same time as it goes. Much love to you❤️ ps/ dont know what im writing, i don't really know anything anymore
I have often experienced that in the times when I feel more "awake", yes, sometimes I can see the beauty of the world more clearly, but I also start to see the evils and power struggles and injustices. It makes me hyperaware of how my place in this society is entirely dependent on me behaving "correctly". And it makes me so scared to awaken fully...
Suzanne is being raw which is pure gold. It's rare to see that. One could say she's fully present going between the unspoken and mind giving of herself while in mind for our benefit by sacrificing a measure of self realization. It's a gift for others. Thx.
you’re talking for the whole human race with such bravery and honesty and it’s clear that all those so called mistakes done out of shame or shyness or whatever is so innocent. Thank you so much for saying all this stuff in kind words. Kind to yourself and to everyone whose listening. Much love from Germany ❤️
Thank you! "I blamed myself, i thought i couldve done better." Yes, my hurts were considered my mistakes. They must be hidden, denied. Chin up and move forward, i told myself. Such a relief to admit everything, to have compassion for what i went through. My body was frozen in certain areas for years.
We always did the best we could. 🏆❤ Sometimes we don't see it. But if we go back in time, immerse ourselves in the moments we did the decisions... We did the best we could. We always had good resons to do what we did. We might see NOW, how (with the new info we have NOW), it NOW seems like a bad decision... But BACK THEN, with the info we had AT THET MOMENT; it was the best decision we could think of. We did the best we could. So, let's realize it is not fair to blame ourselves for what happened as a result - we did the best we could. It is not our fault. ❤
Thanks for these honest, unrestricted recapitulations. They are at once raw and profound, brave and innocent, astonishingly strange and yet deeply relatable. I imagine many apparent selves will feel a little better prepared for their own awakening journeys as a result. 🙏🏼💖
Hi Susan. Holy sh*t. Just had a realisation that the entire idea about myself has been running on the programme of rejection. And all my actions where an attempt to be excepted by others, society. Everything I've done was an attempt to be excepted. Through this attempt to be excepted I'd somehow convinced myself that what I was doing was what I wanted. But it was actually what would please others. The exceptance of course never came. And that the universe seems to run on one principle only. The exceptance/ rejection paradigm. Be that good vs bad, light vs dark right vs wrong, attraction vs rejection of physical beauty for example. Wow. For the first time ever, everything I thought I wanted is no more. I don't no what I want...... ❤❤❤
@@Jonnobaser12309 ah yes, but in an attempt to not be that guy, you fell into the trap of being that guy. Although I do appreciate the spelling correction, if you truly hear what is being said, you would discover that everything is as it is. There are no mistakes, even the spelling mistake, your pointing it out, thus response. It really couldn't be any other way. So it's all good brother. I'm actually very dyslexic, and struggle with correct spelling, and similar sounding words. Which is also perfect. After all the one thing an omnipotent, omnipresent, omniscient being lacks is ...... limitations. Hence, hear I stand... no one at all. So there is no offence brother, who would be offended 🤔 take care sweetheart 😘❤♥💕
So lovely. Such beautiful paradoxes. Many times you talk about how we don’t exist, there’s no one here, and today you’re talking about the importance of trusting ourselves. And it all makes perfect sense somehow. No contradiction at all. I’m 65 years old and have had this raw, volatile anger in me since boyhood. No one ever told me this was ok, that there is raw power and fundamental truth trying to express through this anger. Many people have tried to get me to mute and repress this energy, and more importantly I repressed myself. But something in me kept trusting that there is something important here. Last night an old friend asked to talk with me, a relationship that might have been considered ruined by my anger. But now I am able to help and be with them because of what that conflict opened. Lately, this anger has been boiling at work, where I see both clients and fellow staff suffering for a multitude of unaddressed problems. So I have spoken forcefully and even angrily. Could easily have been fired, but instead the organization is actually beginning to respond in meaningful ways. Trust ourselves indeed! Love you, Suzanne. So much gratitude… 🙏💜🤬😳🔥🫥⭕️🌻🦋🐣
Also, so deeply happy you have had and do have this partnership to share “just this.” Thank you for being open about the partnership aspect of your experience. It is also an important aspect of my life, and somehow it just touches me so deeply that you went through the trauma you describe here, and now you are getting to share life with someone who sends you love notes about the cobweb he just walked through… 💜🫥⭕️🐣
It’s normal for you to be angry as a man. Anger is potential energy. People don’t run 3 marathons back to back with just complete inner peace. You need to be angry at the world.
Thank you for sharing your story, I appreciate the honesty so much, because it reminds me that these little secrets we lock up inside are not just my own. There is a deeply existential dilemma we all must participate in just to be in a world with other people. Locking ourselves away for the sake of survival --how could it be any other way? Maybe eventually we are lucky enough to share these secrets with others... and the separation starts to vanish. Who exactly were we hiding from...? I feel like my path was a similar one, maybe from a more masculine perspective. My trauma from bullying and family abuse led me to be so afraid of people that it became impossible to connect with anyone but a few close friends. I started to build my life around how I could avoid living in society with other people --these awful, oppressive, bigoted, ignorant things. I had so much anger and hatred, but all rooted in this fear that came with the threat of being ostracized for being different in any way. I feel like I had to reach the absolute bottom before I broke, and was able to see for at least a glimpse that there was no real separation; there is only God or non-dual reality or however you want to fail to articulate that. So my mission since that moment has been to realize that glimpse fully in a way that isn't temporary or forced to the extent of denying everything else. So I had tried repressing everything, and the pain of separation propelled me to the realization that I need to accept everything. What a gift that pain was, and still is. Oh the paradox of trying to accept everything that is, but I don't see any other way (see?). It seems to me in those moments of clarity that it is only in a lack of surrender that any seperation can exist at all. But in that moment of complete and utter surrender to IT, all our secrets are told and accepted with equanimity. There is no crevice for fear to hide in such a pristine and transparent consciousness. So this clarity ruptures out every opportunity it can, but still there are many layers of fear and hiding in many real life situations. There is nothing left to do but to transform fully through self/other acceptance. And I feel like you hit on the key: trusting yourself. To me, it is like the Christian notion of having unwavering faith in God. It is that faith which can be depended on in all directions, despite waves and waves of ignorance. With that unwavering faith, complete surrender becomes spontaneous. In complete surrender...you are one with That which you have surrendered to... Anyway, there's my ramblings in response to yours. Forgive me 😉. I'm sure there's a lot more to it...but I'm progressing in the only way I possibly can. Thanks again for sharing, it is inspiring. Some day I will have to post some secrets of my own.
Watching Susanne walking around this beautiful cemetary and it’s nature, talking about stuff is a very calming experience. Makes me forget the conceptual part of non-duality and enjoy oneness in this beautiful presence from first hand. Big love from turkeyy❤
Suzanne cuts through the BS in a way that's so raw and relatable, yet no one talks about deeper levels these days. Paradoxical and beautiful. Thank you for sharing! Would you recommend any book that helped you cope and understand yourself in that regard? Also, you seem light and kind of blissful in this particular video! Hugs from Brazil
A hypothesis: The feeling of being a person in a body in a world comes about as we learn to experience our thoughts as muscle contractions in our throat and tongue. We learn to activate these muscles when speaking and they are subvocalized by most people when we 'think' to ourselves. That habit of experiencing our thoughts as subtle muscle contractions creates a "feeling" in our body that exists over time as we "hear" our internal thoughts. With attention and practice we can learn to stop subvocalizing as we think and then we no longer "hear" or have thoughts. This practice can eventually become permanent and then we are "awake". This ultimately applies to all thoughts which are just beliefs. When all beliefs no longer are fed by the contractive energy of beliefs then all 10 fetters have dropped.
Interesting subject. I'm now sitting here wondering if mentally verbalizing a thought, which I've probably done my whole adult life, is causing subtle contractions (subvocalizing) in my throat and tongue. One thing is for sure, my mind has quieted down in the past few months due to making an effort to not mentally verbalize my thoughts. I still catch myself doing so at times. Hard habit to break! lol
Hi Suzzane, i seem to be going through what you shared here. Would you mind sharing if you took some medicinal help when going was tough. This will be helpful.
It can be very easy to overlook what you said about ‘not needing to be like someone else’ at a deep level, it can even cross over to spirituality/awakening in my experience. Subtle thoughts like ‘I need to hold eye contact because that’s what my meditation teacher does’ or ‘how present are my eyes looking’ with mental images of how a teacher might behave ect, LOL. Truly being oneself in all of the apparent broken glory is such freedom. And you modelled that nicely in this video ❤
🙏 😁 when your camera fell over, It showed heaven. 😊 🙏 very informative, thanks 🙏 have you considered making art, of your new way of “perceiving reality”? / some sort of combination with your designing... but then completely different....
To anyone who may not have seen it, Angelo’s interview/conversation with Suzanne is perhaps the most potent, tender, loving and mutually respectful video I have ever seen. Just exquisite. I think it’s called, “It Does Feel Delicious After a While.” Or something like that. 💜🔥🫥⭕️🐣
My brother once said, he struggled once in life, that was when he wanted to be the first sperm on the egg. It makes a lot of sense sometimes to fall back on these rather unusual confessions when the days are a bit darker.
C'est une drôle de chose comment les gents cherchent partout et seulement se trouvent partout. Mais laissez moi dire quelque chose du bhodi. Quand tu es remuni avec du dense energie et a un corps (engl. body), comme conséquence t'es reveillé. Parce que ça signifie bhodi, littéralement : éveil, ou illumination.
We all have stuff like that don't we, and although traumatic at the time its good you can laugh at what apparently happened, I guess its also good to openly speak it out now to cleanse the body of any remnants of that supressed energy.
So relating to 3rd grade experience. First day first grade I said "self.....this is gonna get rough" was said even though in first grade words and meaning. Fell off merry go round and scratched my face a bit. Its 4 am and can't sleep. Body is purging maybe, nausea, itchy skin, burping, farting, heavy chest pressure, stomach, nerve pain in good leg....ha ha its shifting. Doesn't stay. Thank you so very much.
Also it would be amazing if you could do a satsung sitting at an Oz friendly time. Just a suggestion/request but I know it so hard to accommodate all the time zones. ❤🙏🏻😘
Wow! Thank you so much Suzanne...Means so much you sharing all this rawness...I feel like how you desriibe the trauma you went through or at least the way you desribe it in the body and the way that it played out in life is very similar to whats gone on/going on here....Its rare to find someone who understands and who has been through it...Grateful for you
I've been meaning to comment on this video. My awakening began with immense embarrassment over a failed corporate presentation 15 years ago. I used to be good at presentations my boss was there too, fortune 500 company filled with executives and I didn't expect such a crowd. The night before, my then verbally abusive boyfriend, had said to me "anyone who doesn't make 6 figures is worthless". At the time I made less than that. Well I was doing amazing the first 2 minutes of my presentation and then all of a sudden I self sabotaged. I heard "you're worthless" in the back of my head and then I froze, my words were coming out slurred and incoherent. Dead silence for a minute or longer? I had the freeze response. I was exposed as worthless. Most embarrassing moment of my life and I needed that job to survive so there was no escape. I had to face those coworkers for another year until I quit. They all seemed to be surprised as I seemed confident beforehand. Since then, I needed to take beta blockers to present. My body didn't surprise my any longer (inderal). Of course, ex boyfriend has been replaced with a considerate husband. The fear of what will my body do without beta blockers lingers to this day. I have since left corporate as my body cannot handle the fakeness either. I have a history of an abusive boyfriend too and CPTSD not great parents.
Thank you Suzanne your words are a soothing balm. The invitation to trust our body and land in our body. Good timing as I’ve just become aware of trauma and feels time to explore for the purpose of trust and freedom. I love that you can fully be yourself now. That makes my heart sing 🥰
thank you for sharing, for your openness, so helpful. That cemetery, especially the statue with the head in its hand, so so beautiful. Where do you live? Love from Scotland (beautiful cemeteries here too. Always loved cemeteries.)
Please forgive the many comments, inquiry comes in many forms and using this space for it works well. No offense intended to the seekers out there. Suzannes nature precludes her from taking offense. I KNOW that.
That tree emerging from a grave is the perfect example of oroborus(the serpent that eats itself) eternal cycles of death feeding life and vice-versa 4ever and ever
By asking why there are so many holes in my face is to digress into a mind unaware of the meaning in life. That meaning can only come from one place, the unspoken everywhere. You already know the answer to it but it requires thought buttressed by other thoughts creating a pattern which in turn creates the opposing end which is the nature of duality and what we arise out of. The closer one gets to truth the less present one is in duality and vice versa. Being able to sit back and have realtime realization knowing more and more stretches the duality further and further apart until no more duality. It's measurable to the extent one measures which is in mind, thought duality. Making videos requires duality by some measure by fully realized beings or fully reactive beings it doesn't matter both are inhabiting the mental world both present as much as possible but one knows all this and the other does not.
What most are unaware of, or no one dares to admit, is that that contracted sensation or feeling felt to be 'I' or 'I am' (prior to words) which all are trying to 'escape from', is, ironically, what fortifies or constitutes a healthy 'dream-bot' (imaginary avatar) - when that 'niggling' feeling goes the imaginary and actually indistinguishable appearance of 'body-universe' disappears, is liquidated (i.e. 'deep-dreamless-timeless-bodiless-sleep') - so we're wonderfully gloriously fucked. Can only appear to stabilise as the primary illusion (Consciousness) by ''what am I?'' (inversion of mind/attention) If 'you're' paying attention you can actually feel that question (''what am I?'') fortifying 'the body', can feel it ''snap crackle and pop'' into imaginary 'place', optimising metabolism and sensory perception. - and that is the 'dilemma' (for those wishing to 'escape' that sense or feeling upon which the dreamt i.e. indistinguishable 'body-universe' depends!)
Our mental concepts, beliefs are very strong while we are "plugged into" mass consciousness program. The nature of the projected hologram. Going within our hearts into The Silence. That Stillpoint, we can unplug from human constructs and become The Observer of our own created projection. Entering again as The One, is Ascension as we raise the frequency of our body, mind, soul 🎉
What do you think of the body as an ecosystem? I thought the body was a whole and wanted the highest good for itself. but it is not. billions of micro-organisms in the body are fighting each other for resources. Cancer is an example of this. In theory and in practice, each cell has its own independence.
@Unbroken Raising our frequency by " unplugging" from mass consciousness matrix, we begin to See as The Observer of this body, this world. We can choose to then enter this holographic projection, raising the frequency of "the body" - where lower vibrational "actions, beliefs and patterns" dissolve. Some call this "Ascension ".
What does, being in the body mean? I am not sure of anything anymore, everything seems to be not it and I go along with it as a play but I don't know what is it...
I can tell from your body language and energy that things are getting better for you and your vibration is lowering to the natural frequency that humans are on now. Are you okay will being in the body now? It's a lot of fun.
thanks for sharing with us that you had a crush on your treacher i also want to share that i only have crushes only just certain people and i also want to let you know that i also have a crush on you i'm in love with you too suzanne i just think your beautiful that's another the reason why i subscribed to your youtube channel and i watch your youtube videos when i found your youtube channel
Sorry, but I just have to comment: Do not disclose your location! The less you show your acutal location - the better. Just by walking around this cemetary, the viewer-types you might not want in your life will figure out where this is. Again, do not disclose your location! Especially not, when this is a pretty secluded area! And you are literally talking about traumatizing physical experiences. "Hi! I'm Suzanne. You can find me in a remote cemetary, with literally no one else around". Jeeesus. Also, there is absolutely no obligation for you to share really hard-hitting personal trauma on public YT. Becoming a youtube "star" can be really weird and to figure this all out is surely one hell of a ride and process for "not-you" you, but please watch out. I like your content way to much. Take care! Love from germany!
You are right and finding a place today it's way easier than someone would think, it's bone chilling how easy it is if you know how to use a browser. I read your comment and gave this a try just for fun and i actually found that cemetery in less than 10 minutes, i won't write it obviously but it's mindblowing how easy it was.
Lovely for you to express your caring and concern. And lovely for Suzanne to walk and speak freely in a world that tries to scare us (especially women) out of doing both… 😳💜🫥⭕️🐣
Showing someone your true colors knowing they won't ridicule you is to say one is dependent by some measure on others for well being. Ya, give that up because nobody can dictate anything to you without your consent, full stop. That can be the scary part realizing you have put your sense of being in the hands of others. AKA a prisoner of the mind like Plato's allegory of shadows on the wall.
@Citizenenak Only the human ego believes in polarity. Gaining and losing is not why we go within. We go within and enter this process of dissolving the human ego through our most painful traumas, with no goal in "mind", just a total breakdown, letting go. This is usually what happens here when we can't do anything else at this moment. Not everyone has this response! We are all equally on our perfect path though. There is no right or wrong way to Freedom. I will say that the "magic " comes when we surrender to the "cry of our heart" !!🎉
Such beautiful comments ♡♡♡ Love it ♡♡♡ Thank you!
It's wonderful to listen to you! You've influenced me to speak to "myself" differently and combining yet another perspective to my MANY others. Very helpful as I walk through this journey. You're fucking great Suzanne.
Suzanne is a good expression of the paradox of life.
On the one hand she is so normal, down to earth and ordinary and on the other hand she is so special, unique and extraordinary.
She is not a teacher and not an authority and yet her words carry a lot of wisdom and truth. This path is so fucking hard, painful and disturbing most of the time but with the likes of Suzanne it is bearable.
Much love to all of you ❤️
Beautifully said!
Much love to you too Mr Björn!
It is not easy, but let's all vanish togheter into emptiness before our body inevitably does so too :)
Are you on the path? Is it hard for you? Tell a bit more, please.
@@aleksal9132 Dunno if the question was for "me", don't understand youtube notifications.
But yes, it is hard. It feels like i am dying.
It seems like two realities, one reality where personal me exists, in time, seperate from everyone and everything, in constant fear of death, very heavy for body.
Then another reality, no time, no wants, no fears, no "me". Though usually it doesn't last very long, cause of underlying fear and traumas i guess.
Hmm, it feels like a endless loop between these realities➰
Hehe, neutrality, or heavy suffering, quite random tbh.
Funny thing is, not matter what happens or what we do, the "me dies" i guess. Before body dies, or the same time as it goes.
Much love to you❤️
ps/ dont know what im writing, i don't really know anything anymore
@@inandouttraveller9746 thanks for sharing. Much love and peace to you. 💚
I have often experienced that in the times when I feel more "awake", yes, sometimes I can see the beauty of the world more clearly, but I also start to see the evils and power struggles and injustices. It makes me hyperaware of how my place in this society is entirely dependent on me behaving "correctly". And it makes me so scared to awaken fully...
Wonderful sharing ! thanks
Suzanne is being raw which is pure gold. It's rare to see that. One could say she's fully present going between the unspoken and mind giving of herself while in mind for our benefit by sacrificing a measure of self realization. It's a gift for others. Thx.
you’re talking for the whole human race with such bravery and honesty and it’s clear that all those so called mistakes done out of shame or shyness or whatever is so innocent.
Thank you so much for saying all this stuff in kind words. Kind to yourself and to everyone whose listening.
Much love from Germany ❤️
Thank you!
"I blamed myself, i thought i couldve done better."
Yes, my hurts were considered my mistakes. They must be hidden, denied.
Chin up and move forward, i told myself.
Such a relief to admit everything, to have compassion for what i went through.
My body was frozen in certain areas for years.
We always did the best we could. 🏆❤
Sometimes we don't see it. But if we go back in time, immerse ourselves in the moments we did the decisions... We did the best we could.
We always had good resons to do what we did.
We might see NOW, how (with the new info we have NOW), it NOW seems like a bad decision... But BACK THEN, with the info we had AT THET MOMENT; it was the best decision we could think of.
We did the best we could. So, let's realize it is not fair to blame ourselves for what happened as a result - we did the best we could. It is not our fault. ❤
Thanks for these honest, unrestricted recapitulations. They are at once raw and profound, brave and innocent, astonishingly strange and yet deeply relatable. I imagine many apparent selves will feel a little better prepared for their own awakening journeys as a result. 🙏🏼💖
Aw thanks Michael!
Hi Susan. Holy sh*t. Just had a realisation that the entire idea about myself has been running on the programme of rejection. And all my actions where an attempt to be excepted by others, society. Everything I've done was an attempt to be excepted. Through this attempt to be excepted I'd somehow convinced myself that what I was doing was what I wanted. But it was actually what would please others. The exceptance of course never came. And that the universe seems to run on one principle only. The exceptance/ rejection paradigm. Be that good vs bad, light vs dark right vs wrong, attraction vs rejection of physical beauty for example. Wow. For the first time ever, everything I thought I wanted is no more. I don't no what I want...... ❤❤❤
Not to be that guy, but it’s “accepted” not “excepted” :)
@@Jonnobaser12309 ah yes, but in an attempt to not be that guy, you fell into the trap of being that guy. Although I do appreciate the spelling correction, if you truly hear what is being said, you would discover that everything is as it is. There are no mistakes, even the spelling mistake, your pointing it out, thus response. It really couldn't be any other way. So it's all good brother. I'm actually very dyslexic, and struggle with correct spelling, and similar sounding words. Which is also perfect. After all the one thing an omnipotent, omnipresent, omniscient being lacks is ...... limitations. Hence, hear I stand... no one at all. So there is no offence brother, who would be offended 🤔 take care sweetheart 😘❤♥💕
Thank you, Love!
So lovely.
Such beautiful paradoxes.
Many times you talk about how we don’t exist, there’s no one here, and today you’re talking about the importance of trusting ourselves.
And it all makes perfect sense somehow. No contradiction at all.
I’m 65 years old and have had this raw, volatile anger in me since boyhood.
No one ever told me this was ok, that there is raw power and fundamental truth trying to express through this anger.
Many people have tried to get me to mute and repress this energy, and more importantly I repressed myself.
But something in me kept trusting that there is something important here.
Last night an old friend asked to talk with me, a relationship that might have been considered ruined by my anger. But now I am able to help and be with them because of what that conflict opened.
Lately, this anger has been boiling at work, where I see both clients and fellow staff suffering for a multitude of unaddressed problems.
So I have spoken forcefully and even angrily.
Could easily have been fired, but instead the organization is actually beginning to respond in meaningful ways.
Trust ourselves indeed!
Love you, Suzanne. So much gratitude…
🙏💜🤬😳🔥🫥⭕️🌻🦋🐣
Also, so deeply happy you have had and do have this partnership to share “just this.”
Thank you for being open about the partnership aspect of your experience. It is also an important aspect of my life, and somehow it just touches me so deeply that you went through the trauma you describe here, and now you are getting to share life with someone who sends you love notes about the cobweb he just walked through…
💜🫥⭕️🐣
It’s normal for you to be angry as a man.
Anger is potential energy.
People don’t run 3 marathons back to back with just complete inner peace. You need to be angry at the world.
Thank you for sharing your story, I appreciate the honesty so much, because it reminds me that these little secrets we lock up inside are not just my own. There is a deeply existential dilemma we all must participate in just to be in a world with other people. Locking ourselves away for the sake of survival --how could it be any other way? Maybe eventually we are lucky enough to share these secrets with others... and the separation starts to vanish. Who exactly were we hiding from...?
I feel like my path was a similar one, maybe from a more masculine perspective. My trauma from bullying and family abuse led me to be so afraid of people that it became impossible to connect with anyone but a few close friends. I started to build my life around how I could avoid living in society with other people --these awful, oppressive, bigoted, ignorant things. I had so much anger and hatred, but all rooted in this fear that came with the threat of being ostracized for being different in any way.
I feel like I had to reach the absolute bottom before I broke, and was able to see for at least a glimpse that there was no real separation; there is only God or non-dual reality or however you want to fail to articulate that. So my mission since that moment has been to realize that glimpse fully in a way that isn't temporary or forced to the extent of denying everything else.
So I had tried repressing everything, and the pain of separation propelled me to the realization that I need to accept everything. What a gift that pain was, and still is. Oh the paradox of trying to accept everything that is, but I don't see any other way (see?).
It seems to me in those moments of clarity that it is only in a lack of surrender that any seperation can exist at all. But in that moment of complete and utter surrender to IT, all our secrets are told and accepted with equanimity. There is no crevice for fear to hide in such a pristine and transparent consciousness.
So this clarity ruptures out every opportunity it can, but still there are many layers of fear and hiding in many real life situations. There is nothing left to do but to transform fully through self/other acceptance. And I feel like you hit on the key: trusting yourself. To me, it is like the Christian notion of having unwavering faith in God. It is that faith which can be depended on in all directions, despite waves and waves of ignorance. With that unwavering faith, complete surrender becomes spontaneous. In complete surrender...you are one with That which you have surrendered to...
Anyway, there's my ramblings in response to yours. Forgive me 😉. I'm sure there's a lot more to it...but I'm progressing in the only way I possibly can.
Thanks again for sharing, it is inspiring. Some day I will have to post some secrets of my own.
Your face does look really moisturised 😌
No judgment - that is beautiful- just innocence and purity- returning to child- beautiful. .
Watching Susanne walking around this beautiful cemetary and it’s nature, talking about stuff is a very calming experience. Makes me forget the conceptual part of non-duality and enjoy oneness in this beautiful presence from first hand. Big love from turkeyy❤
Suzanne cuts through the BS in a way that's so raw and relatable, yet no one talks about deeper levels these days. Paradoxical and beautiful. Thank you for sharing!
Would you recommend any book that helped you cope and understand yourself in that regard?
Also, you seem light and kind of blissful in this particular video! Hugs from Brazil
When I want to feel peaceful I watch your videos. It's like I'm sitting in the cemetery with you
Loving your radical You-ness, inspiring my simple Me-ness.
A hypothesis: The feeling of being a person in a body in a world comes about as we learn to experience our thoughts as muscle contractions in our throat and tongue. We learn to activate these muscles when speaking and they are subvocalized by most people when we 'think' to ourselves. That habit of experiencing our thoughts as subtle muscle contractions creates a "feeling" in our body that exists over time as we "hear" our internal thoughts. With attention and practice we can learn to stop subvocalizing as we think and then we no longer "hear" or have thoughts. This practice can eventually become permanent and then we are "awake". This ultimately applies to all thoughts which are just beliefs. When all beliefs no longer are fed by the contractive energy of beliefs then all 10 fetters have dropped.
Interesting subject. I'm now sitting here wondering if mentally verbalizing a thought, which I've probably done my whole adult life, is causing subtle contractions (subvocalizing) in my throat and tongue. One thing is for sure, my mind has quieted down in the past few months due to making an effort to not mentally verbalize my thoughts. I still catch myself doing so at times. Hard habit to break! lol
Hi Suzzane, i seem to be going through what you shared here. Would you mind sharing if you took some medicinal help when going was tough. This will be helpful.
Best self therapy I've ever seen. Suzanne will be better off for it, and many others will see themselves and take courage. Good stuff.
So much guidance. Just sharing you let me know that it's a ok. What I'm going through is normal. Thank for sharing
Love this Suzanne!
Thank you Suzanne ❤
Thank you for being so vulnerable 🙏
Thank You Suzanne! 🤗🙏💚
Thank you for sharing with authenticity. Simply beautiful. ❤️🔥
It can be very easy to overlook what you said about ‘not needing to be like someone else’ at a deep level, it can even cross over to spirituality/awakening in my experience. Subtle thoughts like ‘I need to hold eye contact because that’s what my meditation teacher does’ or ‘how present are my eyes looking’ with mental images of how a teacher might behave ect, LOL. Truly being oneself in all of the apparent broken glory is such freedom. And you modelled that nicely in this video ❤
Your remark about moisturizing your skin without the overlay, that's huge. That 'everything for the first time.' Thank you for that!!
🙏 😁 when your camera fell over, It showed heaven. 😊 🙏 very informative, thanks 🙏 have you considered making art, of your new way of “perceiving reality”? / some sort of combination with your designing... but then completely different....
I appreciate your vulnerability. Thank you. 🙏
❤🤗
To anyone who may not have seen it, Angelo’s interview/conversation with Suzanne is perhaps the most potent, tender, loving and mutually respectful video I have ever seen.
Just exquisite.
I think it’s called, “It Does Feel Delicious After a While.” Or something like that.
💜🔥🫥⭕️🐣
Angelo!
My brother once said, he struggled once in life, that was when he wanted to be the first sperm on the egg. It makes a lot of sense sometimes to fall back on these rather unusual confessions when the days are a bit darker.
Thank you for sharing this 🙏🏼
Thank you for this sharing of apparent past vulnerability .Touching and strong at the same time 💞
C'est une drôle de chose comment les gents cherchent partout et seulement se trouvent partout.
Mais laissez moi dire quelque chose du bhodi. Quand tu es remuni avec du dense energie et a un corps (engl. body), comme conséquence t'es reveillé. Parce que ça signifie bhodi, littéralement : éveil, ou illumination.
Gratitude for the honest sharing of trauma. Observing and accepting dissolves anger/fear. Such strength comes through in your narrative. Universal 🙏🏼
Thank you for sharing ❤
The true awakening you give also gives me more power to continue in just a flow as how life is.
ah...so familiar with it...yes, opening up to these things feels very messy at times...thanks for sharing...sharing is healing
thanks for sharing. It appears you are on the move. The surroundings are really nice.
Thanks for sharing Suzanne. It's only in recent years that trauma and non-duality are looked at together, it's important!
We all have stuff like that don't we, and although traumatic at the time its good you can laugh at what apparently happened,
I guess its also good to openly speak it out now to cleanse the body of any remnants of that supressed energy.
You are so wonderfully fantastically beautiful!! ❤❤ Thank you for such raw honesty ❤❤. Wish I could give you a hug and share your pain.
Aw thanks Michael :)
Wowee! 🎉
So relating to 3rd grade experience. First day first grade I said "self.....this is gonna get rough" was said even though in first grade words and meaning. Fell off merry go round and scratched my face a bit.
Its 4 am and can't sleep. Body is purging maybe, nausea, itchy skin, burping, farting, heavy chest pressure, stomach, nerve pain in good leg....ha ha its shifting. Doesn't stay. Thank you so very much.
the story of fear and complexity of life. Thank you for this. hugs❤
Also it would be amazing if you could do a satsung sitting at an Oz friendly time. Just a suggestion/request but I know it so hard to accommodate all the time zones. ❤🙏🏻😘
Hello Suzanne, thank you for sharing your thoughts and experiences. I crave for conversations like this. This body I call "mine" is going through it.
You are so beautiful!! ❤ Thank you for sharing your Self! 😊
Beautiful
Wow! Thank you so much Suzanne...Means so much you sharing all this rawness...I feel like how you desriibe the trauma you went through or at least the way you desribe it in the body and the way that it played out in life is very similar to whats gone on/going on here....Its rare to find someone who understands and who has been through it...Grateful for you
I was of the freeze type as well, and massive avoidance.
Such felt silence...
WOWIIIE! yes, thank you, dear suzanne, once again!
I've been meaning to comment on this video. My awakening began with immense embarrassment over a failed corporate presentation 15 years ago. I used to be good at presentations my boss was there too, fortune 500 company filled with executives and I didn't expect such a crowd. The night before, my then verbally abusive boyfriend, had said to me "anyone who doesn't make 6 figures is worthless". At the time I made less than that. Well I was doing amazing the first 2 minutes of my presentation and then all of a sudden I self sabotaged. I heard "you're worthless" in the back of my head and then I froze, my words were coming out slurred and incoherent. Dead silence for a minute or longer? I had the freeze response. I was exposed as worthless. Most embarrassing moment of my life and I needed that job to survive so there was no escape. I had to face those coworkers for another year until I quit. They all seemed to be surprised as I seemed confident beforehand. Since then, I needed to take beta blockers to present. My body didn't surprise my any longer (inderal). Of course, ex boyfriend has been replaced with a considerate husband. The fear of what will my body do without beta blockers lingers to this day. I have since left corporate as my body cannot handle the fakeness either. I have a history of an abusive boyfriend too and CPTSD not great parents.
Isnt that wild? Your story makes sense.
An old saying ....A man plants a tree he knows he will never enjoy the shade of.
Thank you Suzanne your words are a soothing balm. The invitation to trust our body and land in our body. Good timing as I’ve just become aware of trauma and feels time to explore for the purpose of trust and freedom. I love that you can fully be yourself now. That makes my heart sing 🥰
tech difficulties haha. love.
🥰
“Shadow work is the path of the heart warrior.”
C.G. Jung
💗
🌷
thank you for sharing, for your openness, so helpful. That cemetery, especially the statue with the head in its hand, so so beautiful. Where do you live? Love from Scotland (beautiful cemeteries here too. Always loved cemeteries.)
i love you
Please forgive the many comments, inquiry comes in many forms and using this space for it works well. No offense intended to the seekers out there. Suzannes nature precludes her from taking offense. I KNOW that.
Gee, I wonder who's grave is at the tree of a thousand branches.
I wonder their life story..
And if the tree is also telling that persons story.
.
in your natural way u are a beautiful woman
That tree emerging from a grave is the perfect example of oroborus(the serpent that eats itself) eternal cycles of death feeding life and vice-versa 4ever and ever
🍑💨🎶👃🏽💕 umm Suzannes non duality heals my trauma umm
By asking why there are so many holes in my face is to digress into a mind unaware of the meaning in life. That meaning can only come from one place, the unspoken everywhere. You already know the answer to it but it requires thought buttressed by other thoughts creating a pattern which in turn creates the opposing end which is the nature of duality and what we arise out of. The closer one gets to truth the less present one is in duality and vice versa.
Being able to sit back and have realtime realization knowing more and more stretches the duality further and further apart until no more duality. It's measurable to the extent one measures which is in mind, thought duality. Making videos requires duality by some measure by fully realized beings or fully reactive beings it doesn't matter both are inhabiting the mental world both present as much as possible but one knows all this and the other does not.
What most are unaware of, or no one dares to admit, is that that contracted sensation or feeling felt to be 'I' or 'I am' (prior to words) which all are trying to 'escape from', is, ironically, what fortifies or constitutes a healthy 'dream-bot' (imaginary avatar) - when that 'niggling' feeling goes the imaginary and actually indistinguishable appearance of 'body-universe' disappears, is liquidated (i.e. 'deep-dreamless-timeless-bodiless-sleep')
- so we're wonderfully gloriously fucked.
Can only appear to stabilise as the primary illusion (Consciousness) by ''what am I?'' (inversion of mind/attention)
If 'you're' paying attention you can actually feel that question (''what am I?'') fortifying 'the body', can feel it ''snap crackle and pop'' into imaginary 'place', optimising metabolism and sensory perception.
- and that is the 'dilemma' (for those wishing to 'escape' that sense or feeling upon which the dreamt i.e. indistinguishable 'body-universe' depends!)
That sense of ownership or the doer appears to be one in the same, one feeling buttresses the other. Seeing one diffuses the other.
Hey, I thought you said there was no selfie.
These days i feel like there is a veil sort of thing in my mind. I want to fully grasp the concept, but i can't reach it. Idk how to explain.
Try just body scanning, letting your thoughts just be. Sometimes grasping is exactly what's in your way
Our mental concepts, beliefs are very strong while we are "plugged into" mass consciousness program. The nature of the projected hologram. Going within our hearts into The Silence. That Stillpoint, we can unplug from human constructs and become The Observer of our own created projection. Entering again as The One, is Ascension as we raise the frequency of our body, mind, soul 🎉
What do you think of the body as an ecosystem? I thought the body was a whole and wanted the highest good for itself. but it is not. billions of micro-organisms in the body are fighting each other for resources. Cancer is an example of this. In theory and in practice, each cell has its own independence.
@Unbroken Raising our frequency by " unplugging" from mass consciousness matrix, we begin to See as The Observer of this body, this world. We can choose to then enter this holographic projection, raising the frequency of "the body" - where lower vibrational "actions, beliefs and patterns" dissolve. Some call this "Ascension ".
How can i "be myself" if there is no myself to be?
I feel you!
I think we have to let the typical vocabulary of non duality just “wash” over us when it feels rigid- otherwise it’s crazy making! 😂
Brains and beauty
You can improve the body with workouts and meditation :)
What does, being in the body mean? I am not sure of anything anymore, everything seems to be not it and I go along with it as a play but I don't know what is it...
I can tell from your body language and energy that things are getting better for you and your vibration is lowering to the natural frequency that humans are on now. Are you okay will being in the body now? It's a lot of fun.
Did you completely stop doing creative work after “you” died?
thanks for sharing with us that you had a crush on your treacher i also want to share that i only have crushes only just certain people and i also want to let you know that i also have a crush on you i'm in love with you too suzanne i just think your beautiful that's another the reason why i subscribed to your youtube channel and i watch your youtube videos when i found your youtube channel
I wonder about everything but at the same time I feel like it's all soneasy to understand....
But
..im
Still
Amazed at everything.
Hello Suzanne, why are you in a cemmetary ?
Because cemeteries can be peaceful
Sorry, but I just have to comment: Do not disclose your location! The less you show your acutal location - the better. Just by walking around this cemetary, the viewer-types you might not want in your life will figure out where this is. Again, do not disclose your location! Especially not, when this is a pretty secluded area! And you are literally talking about traumatizing physical experiences. "Hi! I'm Suzanne. You can find me in a remote cemetary, with literally no one else around". Jeeesus. Also, there is absolutely no obligation for you to share really hard-hitting personal trauma on public YT. Becoming a youtube "star" can be really weird and to figure this all out is surely one hell of a ride and process for "not-you" you, but please watch out. I like your content way to much. Take care! Love from germany!
You are right and finding a place today it's way easier than someone would think, it's bone chilling how easy it is if you know how to use a browser. I read your comment and gave this a try just for fun and i actually found that cemetery in less than 10 minutes, i won't write it obviously but it's mindblowing how easy it was.
Lovely for you to express your caring and concern.
And lovely for Suzanne to walk and speak freely in a world that tries to scare us (especially women) out of doing both…
😳💜🫥⭕️🐣
There’s no “we”
"coming back to myself"? Impossible, there is no self to return to.
she's using a language not made for this
Good answer!
Soon or later all will fall apart,becouse the mind is dont believe this human pretending game any more.
story
Life!
@@macparker3549 😁😆❤️
Showing someone your true colors knowing they won't ridicule you is to say one is dependent by some measure on others for well being. Ya, give that up because nobody can dictate anything to you without your consent, full stop.
That can be the scary part realizing you have put your sense of being in the hands of others. AKA a prisoner of the mind like Plato's allegory of shadows on the wall.
There is no awakening individually, full stop. Being in thought is inherently less aware of truth. It's nothing more than a reflection in time.
Use and exploit everything for the sake of gaining truth. If yolked too compassion and love with others in mind you can't go wrong.
@Citizenenak Only the human ego believes in polarity. Gaining and losing is not why we go within. We go within and enter this process of dissolving the human ego through our most painful traumas, with no goal in "mind", just a total breakdown, letting go. This is usually what happens here when we can't do anything else at this moment. Not everyone has this response! We are all equally on our perfect path though. There is no right or wrong way to Freedom. I will say that the "magic " comes when we surrender to the "cry of our heart" !!🎉
the main mask is arrogance .
She doesnt feel normal at all 😅
🤍 just🤍
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