Lisa this is in the top 10❗️💯💯 it’s time to go to the next level after educating ourselves so much about the toxic person......what is it that I do consistently that keeps me in these narcissistic friendships? Extract myself from the paradigm......❣️❣️❣️it’s totally a rabbit hole - I 🧡every cell in my body 🌺❗️
Do unpredictable things listen to your body it alerts you when your around a narcissist immediately your blood pressure will be dangerously high all the time
I yearned and yearned for a partner. Now that I'm finally getting things sorted out the last thing I want is someone in my life. I am actually SO happy on my own :) I have an awful lot of wasted life to make up for!
@Shelly Brooklyn No one wants these people back. They need to go live on their own and either fix themselves & then slowly build healthy relationships or at the very least be on their own and not abuse anyone else. You do not need anyone else to complete you in life, you are enough. Heather, congratulations and so glad that you are finding happiness after being with an abusive partner. I had a similar experience recently and am finding the same results about myself.
I was happy alone until I made the mistake of getting into a relationship, thinking I was "healthier." I think I actually became more codependent because I tried to meet all of my own intimacy needs so much that I never expected or asked for or wanted anything... After all, isn't that what's supposed to be healthy? We mustn't ever want to have a need met by someone other than ourselves!
(16 mins in). When you create boundaries, feel your feelings, and allow loving consequences, PEOPLE WILL LEAVE, but you will be fine. The rejection hurts, but YOU WILL BE JUST FINE. Honor yourself. Honor your highest truth. I have found the gains of being radically REAL, outweigh the losses.
The "I took care of you, please take care of me in return" was the biggest a-ha moment for me. So much of my life has been caretaking and expecting others to do the same in return. Thank you for what you do, Lisa. I appreciate you.
Same here. My mom’s favorite saying was “I’m entitled, I’m your mother!!!!” Can you imagine? How many time she said that to me. As a middle-age woman these days she still thinks I was supposed to be her caretaker. So much is different these days and it’s taken me years to get here. But as you say, the aha moment is really something else when it hits us.
See mine pretended he was trying to take care of mine. He'd try just enough to not have to actually do. He'd buy dinner with my paycheck and say he helped me not have to cook and clean.... just all mirage
I was discarded last January and I moved into my own apartment mid March. The lockdown has been an amazing gift that keeps on giving. 6 months of solitary confinement works wonder on a co-dependent who was so co-dependent whose whole career was built around serving others. I have had no one to serve for the last 6 months other than learning how to serve myself. My mother is a vile narcissist and All relationships have been with various forms of narcissism. My last one got called out well. This wasn’t my first rodeo. Never found the love I wanted from any other person. I have loved myself more than what any of the ex narcissist were ever capable of. ❤️thank you for being her for us and helping us heal.
I so relate to the gifts of alone time this year. Incredible relief, after long spells of being the caregiver, rescuer & exhausted person. Lisa is BRILLIANT & a lifelong scholar-teacher. She brings together contemporary physics, cell biology, brain science & other neurobiology venues, spiritual growth, developmental psychology & more. Not sure people realize how rare this is, but hopefully her cross-curriculum dot-connecting will be the norm for awake humans in future decades.
I was neglected as a child so I have severe codependency issues. Every single relationship I had was sabotaged by myself. I am so tired of pushing people away. 😩
Hey Diane, thank you for being so honest and authentic. I understand where you're coming from, as I used to do that in the past due to severe trauma from being neglected and bullied by an entire range of people. Most people are under the veil of consciousness and traumatised. But not all people. I pray you find the modalities to heal the trauma you've experienced that still are stuck in your body and energy field. I rejected a lot of people, but realised that my intuition was actually on point in some cases. I've joined CoDA and that's been so helpful in my recovery, alongside trauma release energy healing etc. So much love to your heart. I also found that when I stopped rejecting and avoiding my dark side, dysfunctional side, the shadow side, it was very difficult to face myself, but once I embrace my anger or my own tendencies to reject others and hurt others, for example, I can accept it in others too. 💖💕💜☀️💪🏽😍🐈
What's absurd is that we have to breakout of the codependency and we have to do it on our own because we were never encouraged to do so. Thank you Lisa!
When you stop running behind people trying to please them , to make yourself feel good and fill a whole , you realize only you have that power and you are enough!
I began to isolate myself when people pleasing became too exhausting. My narcissistic mother treated me like I was expendable. Her “love” was based on how much I did for her that day and now, it’s like I’ve been programmed to believe that love is conditional, that you have to earn it. This is everyone else’s world and I’m just living in it.
Same here except i was raised by guardians in a house full of people who were/are not emotionally unavailable and very toxic. On my own atm, but still working on getting myself together.
I am the same narcissistic mother and adult sister too. I am finally seeing the light and looking after myself. They have controlled me like a puppet. I will grieve for my long lost years. It’s been a living nightmare unless you have suffered you would never understand the constant pain they inflict.
So,if a person isn't codependent they have no issues? It isn't necessarily doing something for someone is always codependent. Why is it an issue to do something for someone so bad when it's being reciprocated?
@@bethdouty4591 That wasn't a personal attack on you and no one EVER said you can't have issues if you're not codependent. Where did you get that from? Also, people pleasing behavior is different. You may be healthy, but a lot of us were brought up in an environment where how much we did for someone determined our worth. We got taken advantage of a lot. There was no "mutual exchange" or "reciprocation". We were taught that we were expendable and if we didn't comply with what our parent, friend or whoever wanted, we'd be instantly dismissed and discarded.
I am 57 and was born at 25 weeks weighing 1 pound, and wasn’t held for the first 5 months of my life in the hospital,my twin brother died at birth he was 2 lbs 4 oz I was born into a family with a lot of mental health issues, a Father with alcoholism a Vietnam vet, divorce. my Mom had a nerves break down when I was 5, I have 6 siblings, I was raped, I got pregnant and abandoned! Im married and have had 6 kids, I lost my oldest son tragically, the one I had on my own for a few years, I’ve had PTSD, I’ve struggled in my marriage with my husband, he 10 years older than me and pull it up by your boot straps mentality, but I’m a damn good mother!! My kids are secure and thriving! 7 grandkids! I’ve struggled with co dependency deep within I haven’t been happy in my marriage it goes way back to why I got married, all for the wrong reasons.. I’m living with that choice now!! I’m working on me, studying.. it’s hard but I’m moving forward I need to seek professional help..
Lisa's 12 week class was an amazing investment. If you are ready to work on your healing you will get more than you can even hope for from her class. It really is a Breakthrough class!
Carolejean6 Carolejean6 it’s very difficult to move on unless you have lots of money, in fact impossible We were taught we were unless so we take the first person we meet plus it’s not acceptable for girls and women to have boyfriends in the first place, first man is the the ONLY man you can have in life or we are whores
@@leahflower9924 But IN MY CASE, I had to reverse it, what you said. I had to worry about SURVIVING instead of living, before I left it all behind. Tough choice either way.. damn if you do and damned if you don't want to get out of the clutches of the FAKE Machine
A lot of intuitive instincts do indeed have to be THOWN OUT THE WINDOW (like you mentioned.) It's almost crazy seeming/CRAZY MAKING to be FORCED TO NOW live this way (all a sudden) and then subsequently be called "crazy" for reacting to their crazy making..(DARVO!) But it's all worth it, if you're a yet another step away from those crazy mother fuckers
It’s all so confusing , my family are so cold hearted I always felt like the outsider was made to feel like I’m a weirdo for caring for others and being what they called me over sensitive and stupid it’s took me 43 years to work out I’m an empath and it’s normal to care for others only not how I do it I put everyone before myself , I keep getting narc after narc in friendships and relationships but I know I’m codependent and picked up toxic traits myself along the way and now desperately want to protect myself I lost my home , job , perfect credit score over these evil toddlers and now I’m sick to death of hating myself for making such bad choices although they wasn’t choices I allowed people to walk all over me, thank you for all you do you are amazing
Girl well said, narc after narc in friendships and relationships, same here , as I decided to walk away from the last one, dam I just didn't know what hit me so hard or was coming after me I lost my job, find myself applying for other jobs getting it but can't stay on 3 weeks to a month the longest don't know what's going on in my world is everything crumbles around me I lost 2 vehicles, jobs, money, health, my children, large sum of debts, it's like people are doing black magic only to kill, F*** I just don't get it thank God I'm alive now I just want to be left alone to process and heal before I rise back up, I'm not going to fall after everything I've been trough THE RINGER WITH THE DEVIL
Me I saw it way before but couldn't put a name on it, but Dr Ramanie bring it full circle NARCISSIST now I know what I was dealing with for so many years
@ Jamie T643 I am 43 and in this moment I am really debating should i cut them all of my family of origin in country where i come from. I dont even feel visiting my country how discussedi feel from my own family. I was called dumb, stupid, all my life. I always thought that that is not so true, even i doubt lot of times. Now i realising the truth. It sucks, but we are on good side, we are God’s children, that is more important then to be surrounded with many people with there hiden agendas. Good luck dear! Lot of people are awaking
If you don't feel right, good, or welcome around them, then let it be 43 is when you will cut ties with such, since we all are becoming awakening in this day and age if you asking me, for sure without second guessing I am cutting ties and leaving them all behind I have no time for their nonsense and to be treated like an object, from my mother's down to my children so it's deep, keep in mind we cannot turn back or repeat that cycle it's over and done with from here on forward movement, it's sad to say but hey it is what it is at the end of the day all we got is us
Raised in a strict fundamental Baptist household where I was drilled that I was a sinner, going to hell if I didn’t conform to a whole litany of do’s and don’t. My mother was a petite seemingly reserved, pious individual, who was controlling of our every move. My father was tall with a good sense of humor, but was what I now know was the codependent. I was second oldest of four kids, two brothers and a sister. After two marriages, one to an overt narcissist for 7 years, and one to a covert narcissist for 40 years. Now at the age of 74, I’m discovering the depths of my codependency. I now realize how cold and unloving my mother was, and how she taught me to be subservient to everyone. I have been a master at people pleasing, fawning, etc. This learning experience is so hard, but so necessary. Discovering my authentic self has been so enlightening. Better late than never! Everything you’re telling us is so true and critical. Thank you, Lisa! I’m privileged to be one of your “dear ones.”
Yes, my mother did that too, always making me write thank you letters & telling me to ask relatives for money..... in the end a neighbour childhood friend of mine said their mother said you never ask anyone for money, which was when I discovered there was something wrong. Plus I was always bullied into doing the washing up as if I was the maid, even now I have a phobia about washing up as it brings back the emotional blackmail & guilt trap I was in for years, years later I realised she had never included her daughters in the fun part - cooking, she selfishly kept that to herself and never even taught us to cook..... so in fact I was upset because I had to do the horrible part and wasn't included in anything else. Now I'm starting to heal when I realise I wasn't "bad and ungrateful" at all, I was miserable & having more misery forced on me.
Whoa!! Thank you for sharing your story!! This is an extremely insightful comment and one I can relate to as a daughter, mother and wife!! You nailed all 3 rolls!! I see the results of my own codependency from my children’s perspective thru your eyes, I was raised by the SAME mother type and remarried the narc to rescue my kids, what a disaster but having a HUGE moment of clarity this morning! The next BIG thing I’m going to do is to enroll in Lisa’s 12 week program!!! It’s a gift I will give myself and ultimately to others!! ♥️🙏🏼
@@ginamacintire2883 Good for you! I have been doing therapy for the last four years and Lisa has helped me the most. And I did a listened to many of them-many who were very helpful, but she has been consistently the best. Wishing you the best on your journey!
@wiser125 - You are so right. I too did not see through the religious garb to see the underlying currents of dysfunctional family behavior which we so easily became easy victims of. True religion sets you free to enjoy the abundant Life God wants for you.🤗🙏
You are not just enough , you are more than enough baby!!!!may the lord protect all the affected folks!!!!! Alack of self love is the root cause of all suffering in this universe!!!!!
triplekids3 I left my marriage of 33 years in May. It was the start of finding my way back to myself. Even in the short few months of being out of a toxic relationship have made an enormous difference in my life. The journey has just begun but I’m looking forward to healing and moving forward in my life..being enough.
Didn’t even know I was codependent but I always wanted to please people or have people like me. Recently I just stopped caring and putting myself first..I’m losing “friends” but I realized I was the one they could always rely on without reciprocation, they would quit on me and come back and I just took them back no question asked but no more. It hurts but I’m tired!
I get it! My new found time, mental clarity and energy is better than any Christmas or birthday gift! So nice to focus intently and peacefully on new hobbies, tasks and growth. Sure there's a touch of PTSD and hypervigilance, but I never understood the problem I couldn't solve. Wish you well!
I needed to hear every second of this video. I have been so angry with life lately and you broke down everything that I have been battling with. It makes sense now. I have to accept that no one is coming to save me and my happiness is mine. I am going to work on affirming myself. I am returning to myself
Yes, I'm still works through all of these programmes and beliefs and addictions. I have joined CoDA and try to attend at least one meeting a week as part of my self love and care. Hopefully, my higher power will guide me towards my sponsor so I can move on further with the recovery
I understand,bro. I stand with you 'they' say misery loves company, i say yeah Give me your ear, lend me your shoulder, open your mind soften your heart. That's the kind of company that misery needs... Craig, we dont like it but i think we are in a good place right now "stay woke"
Hey bro, me too. And where women are concerned, feminism and narcissism form an evil alliance. Women seem to adopt evil very quickly don't they? Well they ARE daughters of EVE, what can we expect?
My mother's codependency was far worse than my father's narcissism. She just wanted me to please everyone but especially my Dad from the earliest age I can remember.
I'm awake..raised by a Narcissist.. I still run into these types.. Now I recognize them and disengage. I am just trying to understand this dynamic of myself that attracts them to me.. I have been no contact with any family I have left as I found I was in their eyes responsible for everyone's bad choices.. I would like to have a resiprical friendship with a real person and just be me... Forever growing into self love.
Good on you. You got this! Just work on finding the authentic you again and reprogram your self talk to learn how to love the real you. It all begins there. All the best.
I only have a few friendships that are reciprocal. When your around a person that recognizes they have made mistakes or are growth oriented those are the people you can have real relationship/friendships with.
The biggest thing I realized is that I always felt like I needed a "good friend" or "best friend" to feel like I was worth being paid attention to at all. Honestly, this just lead to me becoming way too much of a people pleaser, especially when so-called friends were not being the most awesome...just had to learn to see through the b.s. more. Now, I only have a handful of friends I see every now and then. The gold thing is I have a space on my life where I can start a relationship again, without feeling like any of my "friends" will feel neglected by the deep connection I hope to have with my partner.
@@shawnmendrek3544 yes!! I believe I am now enjoying that connection with my partner, and all my friends are supportive of it and give us the space we need
Wow, as I was listening, I was about to order a book for my daughter who is disrespectfull and verbally abusive! I almost cried when the light came on in my head for me to STOP✋. It is her journey, let her figure it out while I am on my journey!
I disagree as a parent it's your job to parent her. I think it's our job to re direct our kids under 18 of course but not to ppl we didn't bring in this world
You made a great choice. If your daughter is older than 16, or quite mature and independent, forcing anything onto her will only make her more defensive and thus aggressive. Focus on yourself, lead by example. Many mothers try to forcibly help their children because they think that they themselves don't deserve that help from themselves. Don't be codependent on your kids, it hinders our development. When the child is still small, then of course it's your job to raise them, but once they go out into the world, let them learn and offer support and guidance if they need it. Create a safe space for them to ask for it. It's not your job to mold them and control them until they're 18. Let them gradually learn how to be their own person. You'll meet somewhere along your journeys :) Also, if you think that the book could help her, buy it and read it for yourself! (Maybe she will find it on a shelf somewhere 😉). Even if your daughter doesn't read it, it will help you understand where her aggression could be coming from, and can help tremendously in situations of conflict. Best of luck to you both!
@@jwalko3068 I disagree narcissist aren't born they're raised. No she cannot force and her child could be defiant but guess what. I was given a book as a teen not by my mom but by someone else and it was about not having kids too young. I kept it on a shelf I picked it up years later. It showed me alot and had wished I had read it a few years back. I then thought wow that person really cared and I was defiant back then. Teens still need guidance but we dont know the full dynamics but I will say I'm always sceptical when I see a comment like this from a parent.
Ok i see your point. I said what i said because my experince is quite different. My mother has decades worth of unresolved issues and trauma and narcissistic tendencies. She has been so codependent on me since even before i was born, that she wanted to raise me to be the Perfect version of herself. She's been bombarding me with books and courses and self-development podcasts and videos ever since i was little but did little to nothing to heal from her own past conditioning. She was verbally, physically and psychologically abusive towards me and justified it all with her trauma while telling me to go fix my oversensitive mindset. And i know that she wants me to succeed so that she can then follow my example, without having to go through all the discomfort of the trial and error. She's raising a mother for herself. Do you see how wrong this is? That's why i'm happy to see a mother say "you know what? It's her life". Yes, guide your children. But also trust them a little. They will learn, make mistakes, they will learn from these mistakes, and if they see you put in effort into becoming a better person and parent, they will trust you enough to come to you for support and advice. And make sure that the support you give them is not conditional in the way i recieved it. And yes, at times I could slam doors or yell. I knew better than to make her taste her own medicine. But if you think your child's abusing you, the problem is Yours to fix. You learn first, you resolve your own issues first. Telling people that the minor you're raising is abusive is straight-up projection.
It says to love your neighbor as you love yourself. I spent my life serving, helping, rescuing in an attempt to love others. I just realized I never loved myself. It’s hard but I’m working on that✌️thank you!
Sooo sorry to hear that you went trough this horrific childhood .... You are enough baby .....May God protect us all from toxic folks because they existed for real ........
This is brilliant. These teachings span every aspect of being human, & so much cutting edge research on neuroscience, developmental theory, quantum physics, consciousness growth, psychology, mind-body medicine and the soul. It's just awesome. Much good info out there but few people connect the dots & pull it together into the personal arena anyone can access & act on. I hope people appreciate how rare & generous this is. Also needed at this time on earth. Until humans figure out how to grow up spiritually & mentally, we will keep being prey to political charlatans, the global power hungry, manipulaors & the bad ideas that keep people fighting, destroying one another & our gracious vital biosphere.
I recently got your book on codependent and working on it. Thank you this has been eye awakening after abusive parents and 34 years of a narcissist spouse. I have been diagnosed with PTSD, depression, anxiety and now things are coming together. Thank you.
You just defined my week. Every interaction I've had this week has been a slap in the face of reality. I think, I've woken up from the matrix. I feel like I'm constantly getting dragged back into it.
Me too and I am 66 and only just realised my mother is a narcassist...we kids knew she was difficult, couldn't relate to others, loved outsiders better than us etc
I believe that a return to loving oneself means authentic,conscious and healthy acceptance and expression of all emotions that arise. Labeling fear, anger or sadness as “ bad” and only love as “ good” keeps us stuck in a place where we aren’t healthy in accepting authentic emotions. I just had to add that as so many people seem to equate being in a “ higher frequency” with only good and pure love. Higher frequency to me means being able to authentically express sadness, grief, anger and embrace a deeply authentic expression of our humanity completely. ❤️ great video. Speaking of seeing old paradigm relationships everywhere when you awaken, politics is a realm where all of that sickness plays out, blame, making someone else responsible, looking for a savior, believing anyone is coming to save us and so on.
Emotionally abandoned by my mother (alcoholic) and physically abandoned by my father (died when I was a child), grew up unknowingly co-dependant. Lots of narcs in my life, I was below the veil, but last few years slowly woke up. Last year was the epiphany moment. It's been really, really rough. I am putting myself back together, but it's taking time. I feel broken with no energy. Reading and your videos help me a lot! I do things for people, and now only expect a thank you, is that dysfunctional to expect? It's only common courtesy? Thank you for being there Lisa, you are doing so much good in the world. ♥
I am completely exhausted too, but like you, walking toward the exit from letting people run all over me. Whenever I volunteer to do something for someone without them asking, I don't expect a thank you. They didn't agree to my gift in the first place, so they owe me nothing. That said, I won't continue volunteering to do things for someone who is not also a giving person. There has to be equality. More pointedly, if I do something someone asked me to do and they don't thank me, I know that is a red flag that they are a habitual user and I distance myself from them completely.
@@lilarain9310 I agree wholeheartedly. I was thinking of (specifically) giving a cheque at Christmas or birthday's and not getting any acknowledgement for it.
@@LuvBritTV Oh indeed, NewMe; it sounds like there is some kind of clog in the pipeline between thee and they. Some break down in communication/relationship. I hope it is resolvable! I am finding that in my family tree and in that of my husband, there is no communication for resolving very real problems. So we simply did not learn the language for any of it. In the meanwhile, it's really hard to say what kind of impact holiday/birthday gifts are having when they are not acknowledged. I am so sorry that is happening.
So relevant! I suffered a panic attack over the weekend, which was a spiritual awakening. From all this trauma and breakup from the narc, discarding, his mother blaming me.. 😩 so overwhelming.. I’ve recognised my patterns and can identify them to my childhood. Still waiting for my ahh-ha moment my worth, that I’m enough. Xx
the self-esteem agenda have been programming people to believe that their s*** doesn't stink that they are perfect the way they are, there's nothing they need to change, nothing they need to do. this turns people into narcissists oh, then the narcissist, then of course the narcissist who is not equipped to deal with the real world turns around and uses narcissism as a tool from which to try to secure the resources of others so they can skate through this life on Easy Street. The gold digger, not to be confused with one thing resources and Safety and Security because this is what women seek out,
@charmaine brown I swear I'm going through this exact thing right now. From the discarding to his mother blaming me😧 I'm exhausted but I see the patterns after 2 years. I'm hurting quite badly, I also have bpd so find abandonment really tough anyway but this is just down right excruciating😢 Did u manage to get passed the narc tht was in ur life? 💔
I suppose you can be a codependent, Like me, if your sibilin is a narcissist, ....so now we have to start to do something to change even if It seems impossible...
I am a codependent, and although I was not educated on any of this, I intuitively knew I had to block my sister from my life thirty years ago. This gave me the room to heal and I have never regretted it. If another person is toxic to you, you may ultimately need to discard them to save yourself.
narcs are draining. i avoid them. but now im in a roommate situation ( due to covid) and i cant avoid this one. she tries to get me several times a day to react. thats the tiring part. keeping in check. even when i stay in my room they hunt me or try to start a convo then some sideways comment has to come out. " oh you ok.. hey i heard.. ( yadda yadda) ( boom)...( the comment). its really evil. ........ They asked me to live here, to help, but now its thrown in my face. mostly its like " they doing me a favor" now. when i never asked for it. they came to me.
I was raised by Roman Catholic mom who said marry the first man that wants me because my father "ruined me". He said it was to teach me what a woman is supposed to do to please their husband. I was to be subservient to others. Just like Irish girls in the movies abandoned to do laundry forever in the 1800s. I have a lot of self reflection and healing to do. Yikes
I feel like you instantly unlock aspects of my life that I have never been able to pinpoint bc I am so blinded by the smoke screen of the chaos. Thank you.
You literally explain co-depending better than anyone I’ve herd in a decade of searching. I have been the first in my family to break the chains ⛓🖤 It’s no picnic... I’ve been a cast out of my family but am so lucky to have my freedom, and hope that my kids ( and the generations to follow ) will be able to live a truly happy genuine life✨♥️ thank you for your energy and truth.
Same Lisa, in therapy and being told I’m codependent. I was shocked and in disbelief. I said no way, I’m a strong, loving, dependent person until I started reading which led me to discover my husband is a malignant narcissist. Such a long journey. Thank you for your help along the way. ❤️
59, finally ACCEPTING this is the root of all my psychological blocks! Never had a therapist tell me these things in almost 40 years of off/on therapy. My DAUGHTER, whose degree in psychology is only 5 yo told me this was my issue. Thanks for this info.
It's been a little while since I commented so I wanted to reinforce how important it is to achieve the level of "above the veil of consciousness". I love that concept and it is very true. Thanks again, Lisa!
I was slapped awake a few months ago. The veil lifted. I realized for the first time in my life that I don’t have to be abused. I didn’t know that. It’s a new day folks. So, a few days after that, I made a plan to leave my verbally abusive alcoholic narcissist. It has been 24 days of CALMNESS. I am living again. I am remembering that no one else will take care of me; I need to do it. 😁Thanks Lisa❣️
Wow i have been this way for a long time and recently discovered I’ve been so co depending towards my relationships because of fear of rejection and it boils down to my mother rejecting me as a kid.
I’m working through this right now. Being ok with being misunderstood. Not putting a pretty bow on every txt message. I even codependent with my damn cat 😩. The best thing that ever happened to me was waking up to this ♥️
Lisa, I’m so tired of struggling. Today I learn to be an individual. I’ve been making things so much harder for myself in my life and in my relationships and have sabotaged connections with well meaning people. I’m tired and I’m willing to do the work now
This makes me so angry. I've been to approximately ten therapists and not ONE told me I was codependent! 😡 I finally found the Melanie Beatty book you are referring to back in 2004 but I'm still with a narcissistic a$$ and doing a job that has created empathy burnout. In a spiral of anger and resentment towards both. I feel like I can't kick him out cos he's not working (he filed for disability 7 years ago and keeps getting denied) and cos of c19 but I'm going insane. Oh and the irony of it all? He gets mad when I miss work because my mental state wreaks havoc on my physical health. I feel like the world is going to end soon so making plans seems pointless. Pathetic, right? 🤮
It was so hard for me to face when I woke up. You've got this. If you've been giving to everyone else for so long it feels weird but it's high time you do for yourself! You can do it!
@@redtigerlily8165 You can't kick him out cuz he's not working? That may be a reason to kick him out for some. So he's basically your charity case? And he gets mad at you when you miss work? Cuz you don't make money for him?
@@mssweetlisa there is a free program on Ross Rosenberg youtube tutorial. Thanks to him i realised the codependency issue . Or a super empath. Both very similar. I got his book also . Good luck 👣✌❣
I’m still in shock at the amount of things that I related with. I’m working really hard to improving myself. These toxic patterns are something I am too familiar with. It’s all I know but I knew it was unhealthy. I am going to live a healthy lifestyle and I’m willing to put in all the work to change it.
I couldn’t bear watching your videos for a while. But I’m starting to watch them again. I need to hear the truth no matter how much it hurts. I need to take responsibility for my own feelings and healing. Thank you for educating me.
I feel you! I was crying watching her videos today, realising this stuff isn't pretty. I'm so heartbroken that my now ex was a narc, that he never truly loved me nor intended to. It hurts more still that at the root of all of this was my mother in my childhood and she will never revisit that place with me to work thru it. She has changed A LOT now but the non addresssment of things is still unhelpful. I just wished I'd understood narcissism as I do now when I met my ex.......my intuition told me noooooooo and yet somehow he was able to convince me he was my twin flame. I still dk if he really thinks that and just has no capability to understand how that would really feel or if he knew all along he was going to discard me. It just hurts, I also have bpd so at times my heart feels like it's actually breaking. I'm exhausted and just in so much pain😢
I struggle in my own parenting with how to hold my children accountable without making them feel the way my parents did when I made mistakes. I can't recall many times where I purposely sought to harm or get my other siblings in trouble but there were a few. Most of the time I took on the responsibility of blame because I was always blamed for everything anyway. My kids get to experience being an instigator or bickering back and forth that I never did because of my up bringing so it leaves me frustrated
I was heavily abused as a child and have zero boundaries because I’m so scared to let someone down or have them suffer if I’m able to help because I’ve suffered so much. I live your videos, I need help
Oh Lisa, you explane everything in details in this video, I am so grateful! Specially when you showed with your hands cutting the cords of that thick mass of paradimes, patterns and matrix of codependency! Wow! Thank you! This is one of the best video of codependency so far on you tube that I ever watched! ~Thank you!~🔭☀️💛🌅
What's amazing to this is how there can be such an overlap between religion, family studies, spirituality, and practically everything. Not that it has to overlap! But everything is interconnected! ♥️
I call it a "voluntary possession", like the possessed one made some kind of "deal" with whatever demon, as opposed to a "home invasion" such as was depicted in The Exorcist.
@@Catherine_Kate Counting mother, I've had FIVE narcs in LTR's. In fact I met and married narcwife within 6 weeks of moving out on narcmom. I thought I was escaping. I'd told narcwife about narcmom and she "believed" me. With her posing as a rescuer, little did I know I was jumping out of the frying pan and into the fire. Unlike narcmom, when the quarreling began with narcwife, it would reach a point where I literally saw another spirit looking at me through narcwifes' eyes. She was seething with jealousy during those times. In fact, her jealousy was exactly like our host describes. I could see that that spirit wanted to swallow me whole! At 66, narcs are the only women I ever attract. I need to go back into therapy with a COMPETENT therapist this time because the last time was a near waste of FOUR years...four years that I can't ever get back and would have been FAR better spent with a narc specialist, something that really didn't exist in 1984 with the exception of Dr Peck who was retired from private practice and writing books and doing lectures, which I found out when I called his office. I had brought People of the Lie into therapy and I told my then, brand new therapist that the book was the closest thing to an "x-ray" that a mental health professional could ever hope to get and instead her reaction sure seemed like jealousy, in retrospect. She wouldn't even open the book and look at the chapters saying that "She had her own methods" which made no sense since I wasn't telling her how to do anything, but only that if she'd just give this page-turner a quick read (I read it in a few hours), she'd know why I was there and how to proceed. Imagine beginning therapy for narc abuse and practically being "forbidden" to use term at all and forget about a course of therapy with narcissism as the base to work from. Kind of like being hospitalized for pneumonia and the only treatment given is for a nurse to rub your chest with Vicks Vaporub twice daily, which would be pretty useless for pneumonia as it wasn't much good for anything else either. Did NOTHING for my childhood asthma. And therapy with Susan while ignoring the narc-elephant in the room was equally as helpful. Oops, my bad. I chewed your ear off! I apologize 😎
I’ve realized I was codependent when I watched a video by Terri Cole. I was like holy crap! It really is just a subconscious pattern. I was able to become educated in order to reprogram my patterns. This video is just as awesome, both Lisa and Terri are helping us all change our paradigms. I’ve never felt more safe and confident within myself.
In the past, I always waited for someone rescue me ، I discovered my personality at the age of 48 after hard and hard attempts For self-discovery ، I discovered that I had a compulsive behaviour To please others and take into account their feeling Without considering my feelings .. Now I'am so happy I discovered the secret and I started to fix myself .
"I took care of you, please take care of me..." and that is where and why my marriage relationship has failed each and every day as he has never (or very, very rarely) taken care of me, and always later presents me with a "bill" of "how much I owe him." THOSE DAYS HAVE ENDED AS OF YESTERDAY AND I WILL NEVER EVER GO BACK. I will "break through" the terrible programming I was raised with, and huge PTSD and more, and I don't need to do this anymore. This year, 2022, will be for ME TO LEARN TO TAKE CARE OF MYSELF, as I have taken care of everyone else all of my life with practically no one ever there to take care of me. IT'S TIME TO MAKE A CHANGE AND I AM READY TO DO IT!
In this analogy you are my fairy godmother. Especially when you say "dear ones". I love that, by the way. All silliness aside, your videos are honestly helping me like no other. I am so happy you are here for all of us, thank you. I barely have the patience for 10 min videos on youtube but I spend hours on your channel, it is so engaging.
How did you know I was married to an abusive husband who kept us broke and I had 2 babies with him, this is the most powerful video anyone can watch to change their life! Amazing
When you create boundaries, feel your feelings, and allow loving consequences, PEOPLE WILL LEAVE, but you will be fine. The rejection hurts, but YOU WILL BE JUST FINE. Honour yourself. Honour your highest truth. I have found the gains of being radically REAL, outweigh the losses.
Whenever I hear someone say “soulmate” I cringe. That’s a belief that there is someone out there (a perfect mate) that will fill your void and fix your pains. They don’t exist, you can only fix yourself.
This video is the closest explanation of why I am the way I am I’ve found so far. And I have been through a lot of counselors. Maybe I’m just finally starting to listen. I’ve been studying focusing on the narcissism for too long and have finally realized it’s all about self accountability for where I am today. Self love is the answer. Thank you for helping me along the way.
For me, codependency is when your self-image is solely based on a specific relationship dynamic that inhibits spiritual and emotional growth; it's desperation for acceptance and, at the same time, a fear of standing alone for fear of alienation and ostracism.
My ex told me I was at the bottom of his priority list all the time.... when you said about yours saying he never thought about your feelings I got that I lived it to
Was recently eating a healthy tossed salad of chicken breast, habanero peppers, and romaine (O - pardon the pun --- couldn't resist )lettuce, and I thought of you. You're like a philosophical Stork that delivers key insights and wisdom that really cuts to the Heart, physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. Upward and onward!
Pure gold. Lisa always formulates the essence of parental childhood conditioning to the letter, with all kinds of abuse, neglect, abandonment etc. which inevitably creates adult life the way it is. She is so capable of really helping healing and changing one's life. Thank you dearest 🙏❤️
Brilliant explanation! & Thank you! So MUCH For giving me the hope that I can make this paradigm shift! 😍❤️😍 I’m sick of neglecting me! For my past bullshit!
I took the quiz. 11/18 ... I know more about myself and why I have been enmeshed in a terrorizing marriage for far to long and the escape must start with me. Thank you
I have a friend who struggles with this to an extreme case. Setting boundaries is something that helps. Understanding habits that outwardly show codependency. Like needing to go to the restroom alone, or to the store alone.
Lisa this is in the top 10❗️💯💯 it’s time to go to the next level after educating ourselves so much about the toxic person......what is it that I do consistently that keeps me in these narcissistic friendships? Extract myself from the paradigm......❣️❣️❣️it’s totally a rabbit hole - I 🧡every cell in my body 🌺❗️
yeah i know ... i need the next level or tools. i understood your post completely.
Godzilla man streb 0h00&
Not one I related to
Absolutely 💯
Do unpredictable things listen to your body it alerts you when your around a narcissist immediately your blood pressure will be dangerously high all the time
When the Devil can't get to you, he sends a narcissist.
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😳😳‼‼. No lies detected. 🤣🤷♀️. Damn. Happened to me.
Omg!! Yes!!
got that right!!
@Kiri N lmgdao... im here tryn to keep sane this morn. i needed that laugh.
Love this. The devil can tell those that have great faith, power and strength and will do anything to diminish our power within.
I yearned and yearned for a partner. Now that I'm finally getting things sorted out the last thing I want is someone in my life. I am actually SO happy on my own :) I have an awful lot of wasted life to make up for!
@Shelly Brooklyn No one wants these people back. They need to go live on their own and either fix themselves & then slowly build healthy relationships or at the very least be on their own and not abuse anyone else. You do not need anyone else to complete you in life, you are enough.
Heather, congratulations and so glad that you are finding happiness after being with an abusive partner. I had a similar experience recently and am finding the same results about myself.
Better to be on your own!
Same
Me too! Wasted too much time wasted on narcissists.
I was happy alone until I made the mistake of getting into a relationship, thinking I was "healthier." I think I actually became more codependent because I tried to meet all of my own intimacy needs so much that I never expected or asked for or wanted anything... After all, isn't that what's supposed to be healthy? We mustn't ever want to have a need met by someone other than ourselves!
(16 mins in). When you create boundaries, feel your feelings, and allow loving consequences, PEOPLE WILL LEAVE, but you will be fine. The rejection hurts, but YOU WILL BE JUST FINE. Honor yourself. Honor your highest truth. I have found the gains of being radically REAL, outweigh the losses.
Thank you Lisa. It makes sense. We only have ourselves in the end. Truly.
Awesome
Awesome truth
Hurts when you realize those people never liked YOU anyway.
Thank you for sharing this hope.
The "I took care of you, please take care of me in return" was the biggest a-ha moment for me. So much of my life has been caretaking and expecting others to do the same in return.
Thank you for what you do, Lisa. I appreciate you.
Same here. My mom’s favorite saying was “I’m entitled, I’m your mother!!!!” Can you imagine? How many time she said that to me. As a middle-age woman these days she still thinks I was supposed to be her caretaker. So much is different these days and it’s taken me years to get here. But as you say, the aha moment is really something else when it hits us.
See mine pretended he was trying to take care of mine. He'd try just enough to not have to actually do. He'd buy dinner with my paycheck and say he helped me not have to cook and clean.... just all mirage
@@lovelysnowella1665 unbelievable
I was discarded last January and I moved into my own apartment mid March. The lockdown has been an amazing gift that keeps on giving. 6 months of solitary confinement works wonder on a co-dependent who was so co-dependent whose whole career was built around serving others. I have had no one to serve for the last 6 months other than learning how to serve myself. My mother is a vile narcissist and All relationships have been with various forms of narcissism. My last one got called out well. This wasn’t my first rodeo. Never found the love I wanted from any other person. I have loved myself more than what any of the ex narcissist were ever capable of. ❤️thank you for being her for us and helping us heal.
I so relate to the gifts of alone time this year. Incredible relief, after long spells of being the caregiver, rescuer & exhausted person. Lisa is BRILLIANT & a lifelong scholar-teacher. She brings together contemporary physics, cell biology, brain science & other neurobiology venues, spiritual growth, developmental psychology & more. Not sure people realize how rare this is, but hopefully her cross-curriculum dot-connecting will be the norm for awake humans in future decades.
🤔😔🙋♀️👐👐😉 yes Working Wonders on me. The story of me playing Saviour and Service to Others the last 20 yrs and I'm 42. Time for me now.👐👐
@@lizafield9002 I believe want us to rest.
I believe God want us to rest. He say come to him all who are heavy laden I will give you rest.
I believe God want us to rest. He say come to him all who are heavy laden I will give you rest.
I was neglected as a child so I have severe codependency issues. Every single relationship I had was sabotaged by myself. I am so tired of pushing people away. 😩
darling you got this , first step you allready done ...
@@lenafuza9338 thank you 💖
Hey Diane, thank you for being so honest and authentic. I understand where you're coming from, as I used to do that in the past due to severe trauma from being neglected and bullied by an entire range of people. Most people are under the veil of consciousness and traumatised. But not all people.
I pray you find the modalities to heal the trauma you've experienced that still are stuck in your body and energy field.
I rejected a lot of people, but realised that my intuition was actually on point in some cases.
I've joined CoDA and that's been so helpful in my recovery, alongside trauma release energy healing etc.
So much love to your heart.
I also found that when I stopped rejecting and avoiding my dark side, dysfunctional side, the shadow side, it was very difficult to face myself, but once I embrace my anger or my own tendencies to reject others and hurt others, for example, I can accept it in others too. 💖💕💜☀️💪🏽😍🐈
@@skyejacques Appreciate your words 🥺💕
@@skyejacques what trauma release energy healing did you do?
What's absurd is that we have to breakout of the codependency and we have to do it on our own because we were never encouraged to do so. Thank you Lisa!
When you stop running behind people trying to please them , to make yourself feel good and fill a whole , you realize only you have that power and you are enough!
I began to isolate myself when people pleasing became too exhausting. My narcissistic mother treated me like I was expendable. Her “love” was based on how much I did for her that day and now, it’s like I’ve been programmed to believe that love is conditional, that you have to earn it. This is everyone else’s world and I’m just living in it.
This, hate it but I’ve been crawling out. Hope you can too ❤️
Same here except i was raised by guardians in a house full of people who were/are not emotionally unavailable and very toxic. On my own atm, but still working on getting myself together.
I am the same narcissistic mother and adult sister too. I am finally seeing the light and looking after myself. They have controlled me like a puppet. I will grieve for my long lost years. It’s been a living nightmare unless you have suffered you would never understand the constant pain they inflict.
So,if a person isn't codependent they have no issues? It isn't necessarily doing something for someone is always codependent. Why is it an issue to do something for someone so bad when it's being reciprocated?
@@bethdouty4591 That wasn't a personal attack on you and no one EVER said you can't have issues if you're not codependent. Where did you get that from?
Also, people pleasing behavior is different. You may be healthy, but a lot of us were brought up in an environment where how much we did for someone determined our worth. We got taken advantage of a lot. There was no "mutual exchange" or "reciprocation". We were taught that we were expendable and if we didn't comply with what our parent, friend or whoever wanted, we'd be instantly dismissed and discarded.
I am 57 and was born at 25 weeks weighing 1 pound, and wasn’t held for the first 5 months of my life in the hospital,my twin brother died at birth he was 2 lbs 4 oz I was born into a family with a lot of mental health issues, a Father with alcoholism a Vietnam vet, divorce. my Mom had a nerves break down when I was 5, I have 6 siblings, I was raped, I got pregnant and abandoned! Im married and have had 6 kids, I lost my oldest son tragically, the one I had on my own for a few years, I’ve had PTSD, I’ve struggled in my marriage with my husband, he 10 years older than me and pull it up by your boot straps mentality, but I’m a damn good mother!! My kids are secure and thriving! 7 grandkids! I’ve struggled with co dependency deep within I haven’t been happy in my marriage it goes way back to why I got married, all for the wrong reasons.. I’m living with that choice now!! I’m working on me, studying.. it’s hard but I’m moving forward I need to seek professional help..
Lisa's 12 week class was an amazing investment. If you are ready to work on your healing you will get more than you can even hope for from her class. It really is a Breakthrough class!
You can do it! The biggest hurdle is knowing the problem.
Carolejean6 Carolejean6 it’s very difficult to move on unless you have lots of money, in fact impossible
We were taught we were unless so we take the first person we meet plus it’s not acceptable for girls and women to have boyfriends in the first place, first man is the the ONLY man you can have in life or we are whores
U r an amazing woman! Bless u Queen!
my first foster home was like that was left in a crib. then got to my adopted parents house. just identifying. trying to find my common denominator.
In order to develop a self you need calmness. There was no calmness. What an amazing insight. Thank you Lisa.
Right !
Yeah because you're in survival mode you develop sense of self when you stop worrying about survival and worry about living
@@leahflower9924 But IN MY CASE, I had to reverse it, what you said. I had to worry about SURVIVING instead of living, before I left it all behind. Tough choice either way.. damn if you do and damned if you don't want to get out of the clutches of the FAKE Machine
A lot of intuitive instincts do indeed have to be THOWN OUT THE WINDOW (like you mentioned.) It's almost crazy seeming/CRAZY MAKING to be FORCED TO NOW live this way (all a sudden) and then subsequently be called "crazy" for reacting to their crazy making..(DARVO!)
But it's all worth it, if you're a yet another step away from those crazy mother fuckers
It’s all so confusing , my family are so cold hearted I always felt like the outsider was made to feel like I’m a weirdo for caring for others and being what they called me over sensitive and stupid it’s took me 43 years to work out I’m an empath and it’s normal to care for others only not how I do it I put everyone before myself , I keep getting narc after narc in friendships and relationships but I know I’m codependent and picked up toxic traits myself along the way and now desperately want to protect myself I lost my home , job , perfect credit score over these evil toddlers and now I’m sick to death of hating myself for making such bad choices although they wasn’t choices I allowed people to walk all over me, thank you for all you do you are amazing
Girl well said, narc after narc in friendships and relationships, same here , as I decided to walk away from the last one, dam I just didn't know what hit me so hard or was coming after me I lost my job, find myself applying for other jobs getting it but can't stay on 3 weeks to a month the longest don't know what's going on in my world is everything crumbles around me I lost 2 vehicles, jobs, money, health, my children, large sum of debts, it's like people are doing black magic only to kill, F*** I just don't get it thank God I'm alive now I just want to be left alone to process and heal before I rise back up, I'm not going to fall after everything I've been trough THE RINGER WITH THE DEVIL
best wishes Jamie... I was 53 before I 'got it'...
Me I saw it way before but couldn't put a name on it, but Dr Ramanie bring it full circle NARCISSIST now I know what I was dealing with for so many years
@ Jamie T643 I am 43 and in this moment I am really debating should i cut them all of my family of origin in country where i come from. I dont even feel visiting my country how discussedi feel from my own family. I was called dumb, stupid, all my life. I always thought that that is not so true, even i doubt lot of times. Now i realising the truth. It sucks, but we are on good side, we are God’s children, that is more important then to be surrounded with many people with there hiden agendas. Good luck dear! Lot of people are awaking
If you don't feel right, good, or welcome around them, then let it be 43 is when you will cut ties with such, since we all are becoming awakening in this day and age if you asking me, for sure without second guessing I am cutting ties and leaving them all behind I have no time for their nonsense and to be treated like an object, from my mother's down to my children so it's deep, keep in mind we cannot turn back or repeat that cycle it's over and done with from here on forward movement, it's sad to say but hey it is what it is at the end of the day all we got is us
Raised in a strict fundamental Baptist household where I was drilled that I was a sinner, going to hell if I didn’t conform to a whole litany of do’s and don’t. My mother was a petite seemingly reserved, pious individual, who was controlling of our every move. My father was tall with a good sense of humor, but was what I now know was the codependent. I was second oldest of four kids, two brothers and a sister. After two marriages, one to an overt narcissist for 7 years, and one to a covert narcissist for 40 years. Now at the age of 74, I’m discovering the depths of my codependency. I now realize how cold and unloving my mother was, and how she taught me to be subservient to everyone. I have been a master at people pleasing, fawning, etc. This learning experience is so hard, but so necessary. Discovering my authentic self has been so enlightening. Better late than never! Everything you’re telling us is so true and critical. Thank you, Lisa! I’m privileged to be one of your “dear ones.”
Hello Wiser125, so wonderful that you began your journey❤️🙏 We are all part of this family of change! ☺️
Yes, my mother did that too, always making me write thank you letters & telling me to ask relatives for money..... in the end a neighbour childhood friend of mine said their mother said you never ask anyone for money, which was when I discovered there was something wrong. Plus I was always bullied into doing the washing up as if I was the maid, even now I have a phobia about washing up as it brings back the emotional blackmail & guilt trap I was in for years, years later I realised she had never included her daughters in the fun part - cooking, she selfishly kept that to herself and never even taught us to cook..... so in fact I was upset because I had to do the horrible part and wasn't included in anything else. Now I'm starting to heal when I realise I wasn't "bad and ungrateful" at all, I was miserable & having more misery forced on me.
Whoa!! Thank you for sharing your story!! This is an extremely insightful comment and one I can relate to as a daughter, mother and wife!! You nailed all 3 rolls!! I see the results of my own codependency from my children’s perspective thru your eyes, I was raised by the SAME mother type and remarried the narc to rescue my kids, what a disaster but having a HUGE moment of clarity this morning! The next BIG thing I’m going to do is to enroll in Lisa’s 12 week program!!! It’s a gift I will give myself and ultimately to others!! ♥️🙏🏼
@@ginamacintire2883 Good for you! I have been doing therapy for the last four years and Lisa has helped me the most. And I did a listened to many of them-many who were very helpful, but she has been consistently the best. Wishing you the best on your journey!
@wiser125 - You are so right.
I too did not see through the religious garb to see the underlying currents of dysfunctional family behavior which we so easily became easy victims of. True religion sets you free to enjoy the abundant Life God wants for you.🤗🙏
I am Enough I left my husband of 33 years
🙏
That‘s very brave 🥂
That hadda been tough.
You are not just enough , you are more than enough baby!!!!may the lord protect all the affected folks!!!!! Alack of self love is the root cause of all suffering in this universe!!!!!
triplekids3 I left my marriage of 33 years in May. It was the start of finding my way back to myself. Even in the short few months of being out of a toxic relationship have made an enormous difference in my life. The journey has just begun but I’m looking forward to healing and moving forward in my life..being enough.
Didn’t even know I was codependent but I always wanted to please people or have people like me. Recently I just stopped caring and putting myself first..I’m losing “friends” but I realized I was the one they could always rely on without reciprocation, they would quit on me and come back and I just took them back no question asked but no more. It hurts but I’m tired!
I get it! My new found time, mental clarity and energy is better than any Christmas or birthday gift!
So nice to focus intently and peacefully on new hobbies, tasks and growth. Sure there's a touch of PTSD and hypervigilance, but I never understood the problem I couldn't solve. Wish you well!
I needed to hear every second of this video. I have been so angry with life lately and you broke down everything that I have been battling with. It makes sense now. I have to accept that no one is coming to save me and my happiness is mine. I am going to work on affirming myself. I am returning to myself
After finding yourself, you may also find supportive new folks to feel comfortable with and to share the joy of life.
@@annasurf595 I am looking forward to it
You're so right. I'm in the same position.
Yes, I'm still works through all of these programmes and beliefs and addictions. I have joined CoDA and try to attend at least one meeting a week as part of my self love and care. Hopefully, my higher power will guide me towards my sponsor so I can move on further with the recovery
My codependacy causes me to have trust issues been backstabbed & thrown under the bus for far too long .
Me too
I understand,bro. I stand with you
'they' say misery loves company, i say yeah
Give me your ear, lend me your shoulder, open your mind soften your heart.
That's the kind of company that misery needs...
Craig, we dont like it but i think we are in a good place right now "stay woke"
Paul yeah don't get caught!!!
@@Paul-173 too good you are ,don't get in the hands of narcissistic ppl ,keep ur boundaries intact 🙄💪🖐️
Hey bro, me too. And where women are concerned, feminism and narcissism form an evil alliance. Women seem to adopt evil very quickly don't they? Well they ARE daughters of EVE, what can we expect?
My mother's codependency was far worse than my father's narcissism. She just wanted me to please everyone but especially my Dad from the earliest age I can remember.
Same here! And to add to the fun both were alcoholic. Brother was the screw-up, scape goat; I was the invisible dutiful daughter.
I'm awake..raised by a Narcissist.. I still run into these types.. Now I recognize them and disengage. I am just trying to understand this dynamic of myself that attracts them to me.. I have been no contact with any family I have left as I found I was in their eyes responsible for everyone's bad choices..
I would like to have a resiprical friendship with a real person and just be me... Forever growing into self love.
Good on you. You got this! Just work on finding the authentic you again and reprogram your self talk to learn how to love the real you. It all begins there. All the best.
They be made also I remember i met this guy he was normal but all of sudden start to develop narcissistic traits so its scary also
I only have a few friendships that are reciprocal. When your around a person that recognizes they have made mistakes or are growth oriented those are the people you can have real relationship/friendships with.
My decision has been to not get involved and remain living alone. I still need to heal more and love myself. These times make it a real challenge
@Shelly Brooklyn WTF?
The biggest thing I realized is that I always felt like I needed a "good friend" or "best friend" to feel like I was worth being paid attention to at all. Honestly, this just lead to me becoming way too much of a people pleaser, especially when so-called friends were not being the most awesome...just had to learn to see through the b.s. more.
Now, I only have a handful of friends I see every now and then. The gold thing is I have a space on my life where I can start a relationship again, without feeling like any of my "friends" will feel neglected by the deep connection I hope to have with my partner.
Brilliant. I totally understand. My experience is very similar.
@@shawnmendrek3544 yes!! I believe I am now enjoying that connection with my partner, and all my friends are supportive of it and give us the space we need
the lost self is no joke. the story of my life.
Mine too
Wow, as I was listening, I was about to order a book for my daughter who is disrespectfull and verbally abusive! I almost cried when the light came on in my head for me to STOP✋. It is her journey, let her figure it out while I am on my journey!
I disagree as a parent it's your job to parent her. I think it's our job to re direct our kids under 18 of course but not to ppl we didn't bring in this world
You made a great choice. If your daughter is older than 16, or quite mature and independent, forcing anything onto her will only make her more defensive and thus aggressive. Focus on yourself, lead by example. Many mothers try to forcibly help their children because they think that they themselves don't deserve that help from themselves. Don't be codependent on your kids, it hinders our development. When the child is still small, then of course it's your job to raise them, but once they go out into the world, let them learn and offer support and guidance if they need it. Create a safe space for them to ask for it. It's not your job to mold them and control them until they're 18. Let them gradually learn how to be their own person. You'll meet somewhere along your journeys :)
Also, if you think that the book could help her, buy it and read it for yourself! (Maybe she will find it on a shelf somewhere 😉). Even if your daughter doesn't read it, it will help you understand where her aggression could be coming from, and can help tremendously in situations of conflict. Best of luck to you both!
@@jwalko3068 I disagree narcissist aren't born they're raised. No she cannot force and her child could be defiant but guess what. I was given a book as a teen not by my mom but by someone else and it was about not having kids too young. I kept it on a shelf I picked it up years later. It showed me alot and had wished I had read it a few years back. I then thought wow that person really cared and I was defiant back then. Teens still need guidance but we dont know the full dynamics but I will say I'm always sceptical when I see a comment like this from a parent.
Ok i see your point. I said what i said because my experince is quite different. My mother has decades worth of unresolved issues and trauma and narcissistic tendencies. She has been so codependent on me since even before i was born, that she wanted to raise me to be the Perfect version of herself. She's been bombarding me with books and courses and self-development podcasts and videos ever since i was little but did little to nothing to heal from her own past conditioning. She was verbally, physically and psychologically abusive towards me and justified it all with her trauma while telling me to go fix my oversensitive mindset. And i know that she wants me to succeed so that she can then follow my example, without having to go through all the discomfort of the trial and error. She's raising a mother for herself. Do you see how wrong this is? That's why i'm happy to see a mother say "you know what? It's her life". Yes, guide your children. But also trust them a little. They will learn, make mistakes, they will learn from these mistakes, and if they see you put in effort into becoming a better person and parent, they will trust you enough to come to you for support and advice. And make sure that the support you give them is not conditional in the way i recieved it. And yes, at times I could slam doors or yell. I knew better than to make her taste her own medicine. But if you think your child's abusing you, the problem is Yours to fix. You learn first, you resolve your own issues first. Telling people that the minor you're raising is abusive is straight-up projection.
@@buzzingbee9499 Hello, my daughter is 25 years old.
It says to love your neighbor as you love yourself. I spent my life serving, helping, rescuing in an attempt to love others. I just realized I never loved myself. It’s hard but I’m working on that✌️thank you!
Thank you, every video strengthens me ❤️ I love to be called dear one
Me too 🥰
Me three! This woman is saving my life and I wish I could hug her for it!!
Okay, love you Dear One! Lol
and so am I.. Thanks.Lisa
Yes......it sure beats being called "stupid, crazy fn b"
Thank you Lisa😌
No peace...that was my childhood !.
My parents were abusing I would marry a man of 33 years now I’m free of him 10 days and I love it
Sooo sorry to hear that you went trough this horrific childhood .... You are enough baby .....May God protect us all from toxic folks because they existed for real ........
Aye- good thing is we CAN heal. Now I get to do all the things I never got to enjoy as a child. Including love.
My narcissist parents took me to therapist when I was 7 because I had emotions and they didn't know what was my problem
@@elhadjdiallo633 It wasn't horrific,just stressful and emotionally abusive.
I hear it and I have been listening for over two years. You have helped me change my life. I will forever be grateful that at 55 I finally work up.
This is brilliant. These teachings span every aspect of being human, & so much cutting edge research on neuroscience, developmental theory, quantum physics, consciousness growth, psychology, mind-body medicine and the soul. It's just awesome. Much good info out there but few people connect the dots & pull it together into the personal arena anyone can access & act on. I hope people appreciate how rare & generous this is. Also needed at this time on earth. Until humans figure out how to grow up spiritually & mentally, we will keep being prey to political charlatans, the global power hungry, manipulaors & the bad ideas that keep people fighting, destroying one another & our gracious vital biosphere.
I recently got your book on codependent and working on it. Thank you this has been eye awakening after abusive parents and 34 years of a narcissist spouse. I have been diagnosed with PTSD, depression, anxiety and now things are coming together. Thank you.
You just defined my week. Every interaction I've had this week has been a slap in the face of reality. I think, I've woken up from the matrix. I feel like I'm constantly getting dragged back into it.
The best explanation of the effects of complex PTSD.
The problem I have is my mother sees nothing wrong with me being taught this behavior, she still wants me to be controlled, I’m 65
Me too and I am 66 and only just realised my mother is a narcassist...we kids knew she was difficult, couldn't relate to others, loved outsiders better than us etc
I was 65 yrs. old when I went no contact with my mother. A lifetime of tears and rejection. Love yourself, its not too late.
Thanks for all these videos. You don’t realize you are living under the “veil” until someone helps you see the light.
I believe that a return to loving oneself means authentic,conscious and healthy acceptance and expression of all emotions that arise. Labeling fear, anger or sadness as “ bad” and only love as “ good” keeps us stuck in a place where we aren’t healthy in accepting authentic emotions. I just had to add that as so many people seem to equate being in a “ higher frequency” with only good and pure love. Higher frequency to me means being able to authentically express sadness, grief, anger and embrace a deeply authentic expression of our humanity completely. ❤️ great video. Speaking of seeing old paradigm relationships everywhere when you awaken, politics is a realm where all of that sickness plays out, blame, making someone else responsible, looking for a savior, believing anyone is coming to save us and so on.
Emotionally abandoned by my mother (alcoholic) and physically abandoned by my father (died when I was a child), grew up unknowingly co-dependant. Lots of narcs in my life, I was below the veil, but last few years slowly woke up. Last year was the epiphany moment. It's been really, really rough. I am putting myself back together, but it's taking time. I feel broken with no energy. Reading and your videos help me a lot! I do things for people, and now only expect a thank you, is that dysfunctional to expect? It's only common courtesy? Thank you for being there Lisa, you are doing so much good in the world. ♥
I am completely exhausted too, but like you, walking toward the exit from letting people run all over me. Whenever I volunteer to do something for someone without them asking, I don't expect a thank you. They didn't agree to my gift in the first place, so they owe me nothing. That said, I won't continue volunteering to do things for someone who is not also a giving person. There has to be equality. More pointedly, if I do something someone asked me to do and they don't thank me, I know that is a red flag that they are a habitual user and I distance myself from them completely.
@@lilarain9310 I agree wholeheartedly. I was thinking of (specifically) giving a cheque at Christmas or birthday's and not getting any acknowledgement for it.
@@LuvBritTV Oh indeed, NewMe; it sounds like there is some kind of clog in the pipeline between thee and they. Some break down in communication/relationship. I hope it is resolvable! I am finding that in my family tree and in that of my husband, there is no communication for resolving very real problems. So we simply did not learn the language for any of it. In the meanwhile, it's really hard to say what kind of impact holiday/birthday gifts are having when they are not acknowledged. I am so sorry that is happening.
This is a lot like my story. I’m on the pathway of healing.
@@Job.Well.Done_01 Sending you a warm hug and a prayer for your healing journey. ♥
So relevant! I suffered a panic attack over the weekend, which was a spiritual awakening. From all this trauma and breakup from the narc, discarding, his mother blaming me.. 😩 so overwhelming.. I’ve recognised my patterns and can identify them to my childhood. Still waiting for my ahh-ha moment my worth, that I’m enough. Xx
the self-esteem agenda have been programming people to believe that their s*** doesn't stink that they are perfect the way they are, there's nothing they need to change, nothing they need to do. this turns people into narcissists oh, then the narcissist, then of course the narcissist who is not equipped to deal with the real world turns around and uses narcissism as a tool from which to try to secure the resources of others so they can skate through this life on Easy Street. The gold digger, not to be confused with one thing resources and Safety and Security because this is what women seek out,
Read the book of Ephesians and believe what God says about you!
@charmaine brown I swear I'm going through this exact thing right now. From the discarding to his mother blaming me😧 I'm exhausted but I see the patterns after 2 years. I'm hurting quite badly, I also have bpd so find abandonment really tough anyway but this is just down right excruciating😢
Did u manage to get passed the narc tht was in ur life? 💔
If I’m a codependent, my sibling is more likely a narcisist? I feel so drained whenever I talk to my sibling. There’re so many signs of narcisists...
I suppose you can be a codependent, Like me, if your sibilin is a narcissist, ....so now we have to start to do something to change even if It seems impossible...
I am a codependent, and although I was not educated on any of this, I intuitively knew I had to block my sister from my life thirty years ago. This gave me the room to heal and I have never regretted it. If another person is toxic to you, you may ultimately need to discard them to save yourself.
narcs are draining. i avoid them. but now im in a roommate situation ( due to covid) and i cant avoid this one. she tries to get me several times a day to react. thats the tiring part. keeping in check. even when i stay in my room they hunt me or try to start a convo then some sideways comment has to come out. " oh you ok.. hey i heard.. ( yadda yadda) ( boom)...( the comment). its really evil. ........ They asked me to live here, to help, but now its thrown in my face. mostly its like " they doing me a favor" now. when i never asked for it. they came to me.
I've never seen nobody say these truths, Lisa! 👏👏👏👏all people should know this
I was raised by Roman Catholic mom who said marry the first man that wants me because my father "ruined me". He said it was to teach me what a woman is supposed to do to please their husband. I was to be subservient to others. Just like Irish girls in the movies abandoned to do laundry forever in the 1800s. I have a lot of self reflection and healing to do. Yikes
I feel like you instantly unlock aspects of my life that I have never been able to pinpoint bc I am so blinded by the smoke screen of the chaos.
Thank you.
How to learn to "love myself." OK - let's find out how. Thank you Lisa for this all-encompassing video. I have so much to learn.
You literally explain co-depending better than anyone I’ve herd in a decade of searching. I have been the first in my family to break the chains ⛓🖤 It’s no picnic... I’ve been a cast out of my family but am so lucky to have my freedom, and hope that my kids ( and the generations to follow ) will be able to live a truly happy genuine life✨♥️ thank you for your energy and truth.
thank you for being there Lisa. thank you very much.
This is so helpful. Twenty years of this toxic relationship and I'm at the end of my rope.
This is excellent Lisa, thankyou!
Same Lisa, in therapy and being told I’m codependent. I was shocked and in disbelief. I said no way, I’m a strong, loving, dependent person until I started reading which led me to discover my husband is a malignant narcissist. Such a long journey. Thank you for your help along the way. ❤️
Happens to a lot of us!
59, finally ACCEPTING this is the root of all my psychological blocks! Never had a therapist tell me these things in almost 40 years of off/on therapy. My DAUGHTER, whose degree in psychology is only 5 yo told me this was my issue. Thanks for this info.
What is the email address?
It's been a little while since I commented so I wanted to reinforce how important it is to achieve the level of "above the veil of consciousness". I love that concept and it is very true. Thanks again, Lisa!
I was slapped awake a few months ago. The veil lifted. I realized for the first time in my life that I don’t have to be abused. I didn’t know that. It’s a new day folks. So, a few days after that, I made a plan to leave my verbally abusive alcoholic narcissist. It has been 24 days of CALMNESS. I am living again. I am remembering that no one else will take care of me; I need to do it.
😁Thanks Lisa❣️
Wow i have been this way for a long time and recently discovered I’ve been so co depending towards my relationships because of fear of rejection and it boils down to my mother rejecting me as a kid.
My ITALIAN friend speaking w her hands speaking volumes on freedom
That is so true!! When you wake up from it you see it everywhere and especially in those who are attracted to you who are Narcissistic!!!
I'm working on finding that peaceful place inside myself 💯
Same here
I’m working through this right now. Being ok with being misunderstood. Not putting a pretty bow on every txt message. I even codependent with my damn cat 😩.
The best thing that ever happened to me was waking up to this ♥️
Lisa, I’m so tired of struggling. Today I learn to be an individual. I’ve been making things so much harder for myself in my life and in my relationships and have sabotaged connections with well meaning people. I’m tired and I’m willing to do the work now
This makes me so angry. I've been to approximately ten therapists and not ONE told me I was codependent! 😡 I finally found the Melanie Beatty book you are referring to back in 2004 but I'm still with a narcissistic a$$ and doing a job that has created empathy burnout. In a spiral of anger and resentment towards both. I feel like I can't kick him out cos he's not working (he filed for disability 7 years ago and keeps getting denied) and cos of c19 but I'm going insane. Oh and the irony of it all? He gets mad when I miss work because my mental state wreaks havoc on my physical health. I feel like the world is going to end soon so making plans seems pointless. Pathetic, right? 🤮
It was so hard for me to face when I woke up. You've got this. If you've been giving to everyone else for so long it feels weird but it's high time you do for yourself! You can do it!
@@redtigerlily8165 You can't kick him out cuz he's not working? That may be a reason to kick him out for some. So he's basically your charity case? And he gets mad at you when you miss work? Cuz you don't make money for him?
I feel the same. Wish I had $$ to do the program she has. Now with the craziness of the world I feel like it's hopeless
@@mssweetlisa there is a free program on Ross Rosenberg youtube tutorial.
Thanks to him i realised the codependency issue . Or a super empath. Both very similar.
I got his book also .
Good luck 👣✌❣
I’m still in shock at the amount of things that I related with. I’m working really hard to improving myself. These toxic patterns are something I am too familiar with. It’s all I know but I knew it was unhealthy. I am going to live a healthy lifestyle and I’m willing to put in all the work to change it.
I couldn’t bear watching your videos for a while. But I’m starting to watch them again. I need to hear the truth no matter how much it hurts. I need to take responsibility for my own feelings and healing. Thank you for educating me.
I feel you! I was crying watching her videos today, realising this stuff isn't pretty. I'm so heartbroken that my now ex was a narc, that he never truly loved me nor intended to. It hurts more still that at the root of all of this was my mother in my childhood and she will never revisit that place with me to work thru it. She has changed A LOT now but the non addresssment of things is still unhelpful. I just wished I'd understood narcissism as I do now when I met my ex.......my intuition told me noooooooo and yet somehow he was able to convince me he was my twin flame. I still dk if he really thinks that and just has no capability to understand how that would really feel or if he knew all along he was going to discard me. It just hurts, I also have bpd so at times my heart feels like it's actually breaking. I'm exhausted and just in so much pain😢
Powerful stuff as always, Lisa. Your energy and calmness is so beautiful. Thank you so much for all that you do!
You are a light in my life.
I struggle in my own parenting with how to hold my children accountable without making them feel the way my parents did when I made mistakes. I can't recall many times where I purposely sought to harm or get my other siblings in trouble but there were a few. Most of the time I took on the responsibility of blame because I was always blamed for everything anyway. My kids get to experience being an instigator or bickering back and forth that I never did because of my up bringing so it leaves me frustrated
Almost an hour of wonderful wisdom from Lisa! What a gift!
I was heavily abused as a child and have zero boundaries because I’m so scared to let someone down or have them suffer if I’m able to help because I’ve suffered so much. I live your videos, I need help
Oh Lisa, you explane everything in details in this video, I am so grateful! Specially when you showed with your hands cutting the cords of that thick mass of paradimes, patterns and matrix of codependency! Wow! Thank you! This is one of the best video of codependency so far on you tube that I ever watched! ~Thank you!~🔭☀️💛🌅
I truly think I was meant to come across you. I pray I can learn and stop the heartbreaking cycle.
Who, in the world, told you everything about my life? 😆 Thank you for this.
What's amazing to this is how there can be such an overlap between religion, family studies, spirituality, and practically everything. Not that it has to overlap! But everything is interconnected! ♥️
I took a shot every time you said matrix or paradigm, now I go to AA instead of coda, on a serious note, great video, all of it super helpful
I wish you took insurance. I need your wisdom every day. Lisa thank you!!!!! I’m learning so much about myself.
No one can ever mistake this beautiful, amazing Woman as a “Brother” Ever Forever!
I'm here for this🙌
I call it a "voluntary possession", like the possessed one made some kind of "deal" with whatever demon, as opposed to a "home invasion" such as was depicted in The Exorcist.
Kevin Seraphim Day Narcissists make me believe in dark energies... can feel it off them
@@Catherine_Kate Counting mother, I've had FIVE narcs in LTR's. In fact I met and married narcwife within 6 weeks of moving out on narcmom. I thought I was escaping. I'd told narcwife about narcmom and she "believed" me. With her posing as a rescuer, little did I know I was jumping out of the frying pan and into the fire. Unlike narcmom, when the quarreling began with narcwife, it would reach a point where I literally saw another spirit looking at me through narcwifes' eyes. She was seething with jealousy during those times. In fact, her jealousy was exactly like our host describes. I could see that that spirit wanted to swallow me whole! At 66, narcs are the only women I ever attract. I need to go back into therapy with a COMPETENT therapist this time because the last time was a near waste of FOUR years...four years that I can't ever get back and would have been FAR better spent with a narc specialist, something that really didn't exist in 1984 with the exception of Dr Peck who was retired from private practice and writing books and doing lectures, which I found out when I called his office. I had brought People of the Lie into therapy and I told my then, brand new therapist that the book was the closest thing to an "x-ray" that a mental health professional could ever hope to get and instead her reaction sure seemed like jealousy, in retrospect. She wouldn't even open the book and look at the chapters saying that "She had her own methods" which made no sense since I wasn't telling her how to do anything, but only that if she'd just give this page-turner a quick read (I read it in a few hours), she'd know why I was there and how to proceed. Imagine beginning therapy for narc abuse and practically being "forbidden" to use term at all and forget about a course of therapy with narcissism as the base to work from. Kind of like being hospitalized for pneumonia and the only treatment given is for a nurse to rub your chest with Vicks Vaporub twice daily, which would be pretty useless for pneumonia as it wasn't much good for anything else either. Did NOTHING for my childhood asthma. And therapy with Susan while ignoring the narc-elephant in the room was equally as helpful. Oops, my bad. I chewed your ear off! I apologize 😎
Yes you gotta be here Miss!!! Alack of self love is the root cause of all suffering in this universe!!!!!!
I’ve realized I was codependent when I watched a video by Terri Cole. I was like holy crap! It really is just a subconscious pattern. I was able to become educated in order to reprogram my patterns. This video is just as awesome, both Lisa and Terri are helping us all change our paradigms. I’ve never felt more safe and confident within myself.
Teri and Lisa are excellence.
has anyone actually healed from listening to lisa’s videos?
healed? How do you determine Healed?
It helps. Healing is something you work on...I have to work on me a lot.😔
Knowledge is power.
I gained new labels to help me understand that there is a healing journey to embark on for me.
I intend to give it a healthy try.
In the past, I always waited for someone rescue me ، I discovered my personality at the age of 48 after hard and hard attempts For self-discovery ، I discovered that I had a compulsive behaviour To please others and take into account their feeling Without considering my feelings .. Now I'am so happy I discovered the secret and I started to fix myself .
I feel so embarrassed 😩. The signs were there all along and for 10 years I ignored my gut instincts, my dog (she knows) and my common sense. 😞
That's EVERYTHING- TRUST YOUR GUT !!!!!
I had the best mother in the world. I say had because she passed away 7 years ago. My dad is the best dad I could ever wish for.
I am enough, I’m leaving this idea of life my family has tried to create for me.
"I took care of you, please take care of me..." and that is where and why my marriage relationship has failed each and every day as he has never (or very, very rarely) taken care of me, and always later presents me with a "bill" of "how much I owe him." THOSE DAYS HAVE ENDED AS OF YESTERDAY AND I WILL NEVER EVER GO BACK. I will "break through" the terrible programming I was raised with, and huge PTSD and more, and I don't need to do this anymore. This year, 2022, will be for ME TO LEARN TO TAKE CARE OF MYSELF, as I have taken care of everyone else all of my life with practically no one ever there to take care of me. IT'S TIME TO MAKE A CHANGE AND I AM READY TO DO IT!
In this analogy you are my fairy godmother. Especially when you say "dear ones". I love that, by the way. All silliness aside, your videos are honestly helping me like no other. I am so happy you are here for all of us, thank you. I barely have the patience for 10 min videos on youtube but I spend hours on your channel, it is so engaging.
How did you know I was married to an abusive husband who kept us broke and I had 2 babies with him, this is the most powerful video anyone can watch to change their life! Amazing
Lisa you are an angel, thank you for sharing all your wisdom, you're saving lives ❤❤
Trust me and listen to this twice with earphones so that you can truly hear her telling you exactly what’s happening!!!
Thank you. It took another beating by a covert Narc to get me here. It was rough but I'm grateful to finally see a way out of this cold, dark cave.
When you create boundaries, feel your feelings, and allow loving consequences, PEOPLE WILL LEAVE, but you will be fine. The rejection hurts, but YOU WILL BE JUST FINE. Honour yourself. Honour your highest truth. I have found the gains of being radically REAL, outweigh the losses.
Lisa, you forgot two fairy tails that add to codependency. 1. The night in shining armor. 2. Kiss the frog. Those should be made illegal!
Lmao! So true!!
Whenever I hear someone say “soulmate” I cringe. That’s a belief that there is someone out there (a perfect mate) that will fill your void and fix your pains. They don’t exist, you can only fix yourself.
@@dr.vonslifeinvesting6485 soulmate is cell mate 😂
@@malwinajaniak3025 haahaha
This video is the closest explanation of why I am the way I am I’ve found so far. And I have been through a lot of counselors. Maybe I’m just finally starting to listen. I’ve been studying focusing on the narcissism for too long and have finally realized it’s all about self accountability for where I am today. Self love is the answer. Thank you for helping me along the way.
mentally healthy people got no probs with mutual DEPENDENCE ON one another.
True. This is necessary for healthy relationships. It's something that we should enjoy and should flow naturally.
MUTUAL should be capitalized too.
yeah its the opposite of codependence, which is dependent relationship. the term for it exist.
For me, codependency is when your self-image is solely based on a specific relationship dynamic that inhibits spiritual and emotional growth; it's desperation for acceptance and, at the same time, a fear of standing alone for fear of alienation and ostracism.
My ex told me I was at the bottom of his priority list all the time.... when you said about yours saying he never thought about your feelings I got that I lived it to
"That' when she said I don't hate you boy I just want a savior while there's still something left to save"
Was recently eating a healthy tossed salad of chicken breast, habanero peppers, and romaine (O - pardon the pun --- couldn't resist )lettuce, and I thought of you. You're like a philosophical Stork that delivers key insights and wisdom that really cuts to the Heart, physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. Upward and onward!
This video seriously changed my life, I don't know what happened but something shifted very unexpectedly wow!! thank you so so much
💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕
Don't feel... That's it. That's what I did. Held my breath for as long as I could and just got through it. Acting 🥺
This made me breakdown , it brought up so many uncomfortable yet healing realizations. Thankyou so much
Pure gold. Lisa always formulates the essence of parental childhood conditioning to the letter, with all kinds of abuse, neglect, abandonment etc. which inevitably creates adult life the way it is. She is so capable of really helping healing and changing one's life. Thank you dearest 🙏❤️
Thank you once again. Your so right because nothing happens in a vacuum and we all play a role. Luckily, codependents have hope.
Lisa, You are so helpful. You Speak Truth, are Liberating, Unequaled, and Irreplaceable. Thank you.
Brilliant explanation! &
Thank you! So MUCH For giving me the hope that I can make this paradigm shift!
😍❤️😍
I’m sick of neglecting me! For my past bullshit!
I took the quiz. 11/18 ... I know more about myself and why I have been enmeshed in a terrorizing marriage for far to long and the escape must start with me. Thank you
I have a friend who struggles with this to an extreme case. Setting boundaries is something that helps. Understanding habits that outwardly show codependency. Like needing to go to the restroom alone, or to the store alone.