Ivanka & Jared: Last Week Tonight with John Oliver (HBO)

Поділитися
Вставка
  • Опубліковано 7 лют 2025
  • Ivanka Trump and Jared Kushner hold an incredible amount of political power. That's troubling considering their incredibly small amount of political experience.
    Connect with Last Week Tonight online...
    Subscribe to the Last Week Tonight UA-cam channel for more almost news as it almost happens: / lastweektonight
    Find Last Week Tonight on Facebook like your mom would:
    / lastweektonight
    Follow us on Twitter for news about jokes and jokes about news:
    / lastweektonight
    Visit our official site for all that other stuff at once:
    www.hbo.com/las...

КОМЕНТАРІ • 12 тис.

  • @creamcitysista1970
    @creamcitysista1970 2 роки тому +862

    Gilbert Godfried doing Kushner's voice still funny after all these years. RIP Gilbert.

    • @samwindmill8264
      @samwindmill8264 2 роки тому +13

      Damn, I totally forgot he died.

    • @CTM901
      @CTM901 2 роки тому +4

      Rip!

    • @rocksnrolls
      @rocksnrolls 2 роки тому +4

      R.I.P

    • @code-namejohnny
      @code-namejohnny 2 роки тому +8

      I came back just to hear that bit again. Woke up this morning thinking and laughing to myself about it. Still frickin' hilarious! Rest in power, Gilbert!

    • @kellietaylor9913
      @kellietaylor9913 2 роки тому +2

      Right...rip.. Gottfried

  • @Korandon
    @Korandon 7 років тому +3481

    'He's very uncluttered in his mind'. Probably the nicest way I've heard yet to call someone an idiot.

    • @georgegeef8443
      @georgegeef8443 7 років тому +130

      "It could be a compliment, or a SAVAGE insult" - John Oliver.

    • @robertjarman3703
      @robertjarman3703 7 років тому +19

      Korandon Your brain is very easy to understand.

    • @Ethan-yk3hi
      @Ethan-yk3hi 7 років тому +63

      His mind is unfettered by the chains of logic and truth.

    • @michellete8545
      @michellete8545 7 років тому +1

      Ethan Malloy lol!!!

    • @rat6143
      @rat6143 7 років тому +1

      Jared is a jew

  • @mrknockknock1
    @mrknockknock1 7 років тому +2316

    "The apple does not fall far from the orange"
    - John Oliver, LWT 2017.

    • @hodaka1000
      @hodaka1000 6 років тому +21

      The turds don't fall far from the asshole.

    • @TheLeathlobhair
      @TheLeathlobhair 5 років тому +6

      Yeah that one was a got'em

    • @theycallmenugget8088
      @theycallmenugget8088 5 років тому +2

      Should’ve been my senior quote

    • @janameehan160
      @janameehan160 5 років тому

      At least

    • @dirrdevil
      @dirrdevil 3 роки тому +1

      It's a good joke, but it's so odd to hear the audience laugh so much.
      Trump is a monster, but most liberals seem to be upset that he is loud and ugly. His opinions aren't that far off from most American "centrist" politicians, just more plain. They're all prejudiced corporate cucks.
      People should laugh more at his terrible views and policies, instead of dying over orange and tiny hand jokes.

  • @halliewong
    @halliewong 3 роки тому +372

    "I see Jared as the Alexander Hamilton of the new administration... He's a 3 times listener, 0.5% talker." Sir, Alexander Hamilton famously *WOULD NOT SHUT THE HELL UP.* Jared is _not_ Alexander Hamilton.

    • @NotoriousLightning
      @NotoriousLightning 2 роки тому +7

      Neither Bannon nor Hamilton, but preferable to both?

    • @tobiasmogensen8820
      @tobiasmogensen8820 8 місяців тому +7

      Did they even see the musical? It was well established that the man didn't know when to shut up and be quiet.

  • @julieutley6615
    @julieutley6615 5 років тому +2853

    Mr. Oliver, I have PTSD, (post traumatic stress disorder) from doing my part to reduce hostility, war, and protect our country. So there is always a question of sleep. Your monologues are so good. Thought provoking yet with excellent delivery, inflection, timing and imagery, is just so hilarious as to allow me to giggle like a little girl and that helps me sleep. Excellent professional work. Thank you! Love your style, sir!

    • @danielrezende3343
      @danielrezende3343 5 років тому +86

      You should try cannabis , it has been proven to work on people with PTSD

    • @julieutley6615
      @julieutley6615 5 років тому +110

      @@danielrezende3343 why thank you, AmaZe, I am in a state where it is allowed and it does help.

    • @kimokla3874
      @kimokla3874 5 років тому +23

      YES me too
      yet we need to stop the puppet king

    • @julieutley6615
      @julieutley6615 5 років тому +41

      @@kimokla3874 totally. This...person...is using a lot of Soviet style actions and words to divide and weaken us.

    • @lucasbarrett2831
      @lucasbarrett2831 5 років тому +25

      Thank you for your service!

  • @TsukiNaito1
    @TsukiNaito1 7 років тому +1983

    Gee, I hadn't realized Jared was actually our president. It's like Trump gave him all the jobs he didn't think sounded fun... which was just about all of them.

    • @leavingitblank9363
      @leavingitblank9363 7 років тому +64

      Exactly. We all thought he was going to make Pence run the country. Instead, he turned the Presidency over to Jared.

    • @weaknessofflesh
      @weaknessofflesh 7 років тому +7

      Kushner.......backed by George Soros by 250 mill

    • @Iamtheyamyam
      @Iamtheyamyam 7 років тому +29

      I'm just imagining Jared about to get in that truck Trump was photographed in but before Jared could get in it, Trump pushed him out the way shouting: "No Jared! I wanna go in the truck! I'm the President!" Like a five year old.

    • @unerevuese
      @unerevuese 7 років тому +3

      I mean if he was going to do EVERYTHING. Why didn't he run for president...lol?

    • @Masaru_kun
      @Masaru_kun 7 років тому +2

      he did beg kasich to run as his vp and take over foreign AND domestic policy

  • @ibtheartist
    @ibtheartist 7 років тому +642

    "You colossal fucking creep!" John Oliver , I'm using that.

    • @MohammedAli-vr2gc
      @MohammedAli-vr2gc 7 років тому +5

      ibtheartist so...trump is the
      colossal titan confirm?

    • @LuisRodriguez-qy5xw
      @LuisRodriguez-qy5xw 7 років тому +4

      ibtheartist wow build that wall makes so much sense now🤔

    • @Snow-sx5ev
      @Snow-sx5ev 7 років тому +2

      Mohammed Ali imagine that! that would be terrifying

    • @MohammedAli-vr2gc
      @MohammedAli-vr2gc 7 років тому +3

      kitty cat I'm not sleeping tonight....

    • @chantelsieh3909
      @chantelsieh3909 6 місяців тому

      @@MohammedAli-vr2gc WTF are you saying?

  • @BinturongGirl
    @BinturongGirl 3 роки тому +1439

    Kushner is the guy that somehow gets all the credit for the group project, even though his entire contribution was setting up the WhatsApp group on day one.

    • @kanika_j
      @kanika_j 3 роки тому +13

      Lmao 😂

    • @larrymurrell8742
      @larrymurrell8742 3 роки тому +4

      Does she look like a Afghan hound to anyone but me.

    • @bambieyedgirl7846
      @bambieyedgirl7846 3 роки тому +6

      @@larrymurrell8742 Now I can't unsee that, LOL!!!

    • @johnylalrina1451
      @johnylalrina1451 3 роки тому +5

      Lol this is funny 🤣

    • @troy5094
      @troy5094 2 роки тому

      I think it should be: Trump sets up this project group called the Middle East and Kushner who does all the work screws it all up.

  • @laughable6650
    @laughable6650 4 роки тому +2416

    “The apple does not fall far from there orange” is the first funny “Trump is orange” joke I’ve heard in a while.

    • @nathanaelwaters2509
      @nathanaelwaters2509 4 роки тому +57

      Other than that reddit comment about New Zealands wierd citrus man that is there voting maskot and some one replied "well you have a wierd citrus man as a president"

    • @hugolatorre1037
      @hugolatorre1037 4 роки тому +12

      orange sphincter on bill maher's is a pretty funny bit

    • @shaunarledge1839
      @shaunarledge1839 4 роки тому +11

      Bryce, unfortunately it does. But its still really f'd up. And an insult to fruits. The family is a disgrace. They've enriched themselves while in office and no one seems to be paying attention.
      And I hate to say, what if it were Obama. Anyway, thanks for the laugh .stay strong and God bless.

    • @linwatson7050
      @linwatson7050 4 роки тому

      Bryce this is one time we love the mixed metaphor 😅

    • @ryanalbers5485
      @ryanalbers5485 4 роки тому +8

      In light of the covid response that Jared was in charge of (specifically getting testing kits and distributing ventilators at the beginning), this has certainly aged well.

  • @caribman10
    @caribman10 4 роки тому +2859

    Ivanka here illustrates the difference between an "answer" and a "response".

    • @MH-nc5jd
      @MH-nc5jd 4 роки тому +75

      And that just makes everything sadder now doesn't it....

    • @HMSkillBuilders
      @HMSkillBuilders 4 роки тому +19

      Exactly!!

    • @Souledex
      @Souledex 4 роки тому +59

      Do not go to the elves for counsel, for they will say both yes and no.

    • @MrHistory269
      @MrHistory269 4 роки тому +6

      @@Souledex is that a LOTR reference or is it from the hobbit

    • @Souledex
      @Souledex 4 роки тому +17

      @@MrHistory269 heck if I remember, it may have been in both. I know it was in the Hobbit movies but it may have been in the LOTR books and not in their movie or the hobbit book

  • @S0RGEx
    @S0RGEx 7 років тому +2146

    "The apple doesn't fall far from the orange" Genius.

    • @stickopter2238
      @stickopter2238 7 років тому +8

      Ryan Sorge so fucking good

    • @DickyHertz
      @DickyHertz 7 років тому +30

      That was a great laugh line but don't forget what it followed:
      "When it comes to lying about easily observable facts, the apple doesn't fall far from the orange."
      Unfortunately, the Trumps are so comfortable lying about easily observable facts that half of the people in America no longer care whether something is true or false.

    • @Informatic1
      @Informatic1 7 років тому +14

      +Pranav Paul imagine if people didn't respond to jokes with false equivalencies

    • @DickyHertz
      @DickyHertz 7 років тому +9

      I think the term "false equivalency" is a little beyond his grade level.

    • @ksb2112
      @ksb2112 7 років тому +8

      Obama wasn't green.

  • @huntermooney143
    @huntermooney143 3 роки тому +2399

    For any fellas dating someone right now, just remember that meeting the father is awkward, but at least he isn't making you repair the middle east.

    • @linkthehero8431
      @linkthehero8431 3 роки тому +1

      👾👾👾👾👾
      👾👾👾👾👾
      👾👾👾👾👾
      🛡️ l 🛡️ 🛡️
      🚀
      Best Space Invaders art I could do with the emoji limitations.

    • @melissawarner6528
      @melissawarner6528 3 роки тому +10

      My youngest is my daughter when my son's were 5yrs old and 20mths old there baby sister was 5mths old I told both of my son's "you 2 are allowed to date when you're 16yrs old" I pointed to THERE sister in her high chair and I said "you NEVER" my oldest asked me "why isn't ren allowed to date boys when she's older mommy?" I said "well look at her you boys are going to have your hands full at school especially you Austin you're sister is going to be drop dead gorgeous" my sons are now 19 and 15 there baby sister is now 14 if I don't like girls near my son's why would I like boys showing up at my doorstep wanting to date my daughter and if Trump had it his way he'd be dating his daughter

    • @zb3495
      @zb3495 3 роки тому +3

      Also, he isn’t on National television talking about how he wants to bone his kid.

    • @SKULLFUNKs
      @SKULLFUNKs 3 роки тому +4

      You don’t know that for sure

    • @beedee9534
      @beedee9534 3 роки тому

      MSNBC knows that the Democrats are going to loose the Mid Terms and wont tell us The Donkey ass Orange Blob will walk free and he will run in 24 we are cooked no sense in watch the News any more after Mar 1st 2022

  • @sunflowertm4641
    @sunflowertm4641 7 років тому +3337

    "the apple doesn't fall far from the orange" 😂

    • @sunflowertm4641
      @sunflowertm4641 7 років тому +48

      "I see him as the Alexander Hamilton-" talk less-

    • @drjosephfarah
      @drjosephfarah 7 років тому +2

      spam, go away. your account has been reported.

    • @sunflowertm4641
      @sunflowertm4641 7 років тому +3

      the fuck-

    • @rgreer37
      @rgreer37 7 років тому +1

      ċһıʟԀısһ ɞяıѧňѧ ™ Seth Myers

    • @rgreer37
      @rgreer37 7 років тому +1

      Seth myers

  • @Heating56
    @Heating56 7 років тому +5405

    Ivanka's ability to give a speech and simultaneously say nothing is comparable to my ability to get an A on a paper that i bullshitted my way through completely

    • @Gestersmek
      @Gestersmek 7 років тому +94

      Skipping Stones I'm kinda disappointed I didn't use that as my senior quote.

    • @claudetteholloway4736
      @claudetteholloway4736 6 років тому +8

      Third_Eye_of_The_Slav What would you expect??? She's a Scorpio, for chrissakes...

    • @edwardtheenigma
      @edwardtheenigma 6 років тому +82

      What’s does her being a Scorpio have anything to do with it? Horoscopes and signs mean absolute nothing. Much like Ivanka speeches, they sound good and can apply to anyone. Just enough information to seem like it’s giving you something, but in reality she’s saying nothing of substance. Designed to not hurt anyone’s feeling keeping it pc for all you sheeple out there, while saying absolutely nothing.

    • @CaptWarChief
      @CaptWarChief 6 років тому +7

      Fun fact: I'm doing that right now

    • @jackteo6708
      @jackteo6708 6 років тому

      Third_Eye_of_The_Sla

  • @DanielVerberne
    @DanielVerberne 5 років тому +1647

    “What’s your favourite colour?”
    “Hitler”
    Love that moment, you rock, Mr Oliver (and your writers and researchers)

    • @obsolete18
      @obsolete18 5 років тому +26

      Daniel Verberne every time I see this episode I still lmao at that

    • @thomasrawls4555
      @thomasrawls4555 4 роки тому +3

      You sick fuck.

    • @no_name4485
      @no_name4485 4 роки тому +23

      Hitler is a color he went nicely on his bunkers wall (lol)
      Edit: for employers and colleges just a joke

    • @thekub32
      @thekub32 4 роки тому +3

      @@no_name4485 You are allowed to joke about Hitler. I don't think any employer would mind.

    • @MartinFinnerup
      @MartinFinnerup 4 роки тому +5

      @@thekub32 The thing is, it's not always obvious to everyone what is a joke and what isn't.
      Especially if you are a public figure, as the sensationalistic media will find any excuse to accuse you of all sorts of stuff, such as supporting Hitler and his views.

  • @carolinamurtha3102
    @carolinamurtha3102 4 роки тому +3106

    Just a reminder: Jared accomplished exactly ZERO percent of what he was tasked to do, to the surprise of no one with common sense.

    • @TheNinthGeneration1
      @TheNinthGeneration1 3 роки тому +18

      @Sonic Phil there is still a lot of conflict happening there, Saudi is bombing Yemen and Turkey is still killing Kurdish civilians

    • @TheNinthGeneration1
      @TheNinthGeneration1 3 роки тому +55

      @Sonic Phil they said they would bring peace to the Middle East, usually that means they’ll bring peace to the entire Middle East by ending wars not 4 countries who weren’t at war with each other remaining at peace

    • @for1school
      @for1school 3 роки тому +12

      @@TheNinthGeneration1 definitely, but to be fair it's not 0% (1% mabye but something non zero)

    • @TheNinthGeneration1
      @TheNinthGeneration1 3 роки тому +4

      @@for1school yeah, he didn’t have much of an effect

    • @elrisitas1927
      @elrisitas1927 3 роки тому +8

      @William Jefferson Colin
      With dictatorships , these deals mean nothing !

  • @VIDEOSTUDIOS
    @VIDEOSTUDIOS 4 роки тому +538

    “A Kohl’s mannequin who read a book once” feels particularly apt, given his strategy for the Middle East was to read a couple of books about the Israel-Palestine conflict and then not even invite anyone from Palestine to participate in the negotiations.

    • @kathypiazza7228
      @kathypiazza7228 4 роки тому +15

      Just because an agreement between UAE & now BARAIN with ISREAL Trump thinks Trump should get the Nobel or as he spells it Noble - lets see if this actually does anything. Palestine is still not playing along, why should they they’re getting nothing.

    • @LawOfNonContradiction
      @LawOfNonContradiction 3 роки тому +5

      To be fair, the PA leadership was invited. But they boycotted, and threatened anyone that went with prosecution

    • @elrisitas1927
      @elrisitas1927 3 роки тому +6

      @@LawOfNonContradiction
      Jared peace deals were with families that no-one elected and they will be erased soon
      when these cruel regimes are toppled

    • @marthashartzer6669
      @marthashartzer6669 3 роки тому +1

      Guess Trump practiced before excluding the Afghanistan government and Afghan Army from the agreements with the Taliban and USA.

    • @aamnahere6250
      @aamnahere6250 Рік тому +1

      @@LawOfNonContradiction The PA leadership have been the deliberate and methodical consequence of Oslo so that Israel can have its puppets doing the torture and subjugation of Palestinians in the West Bank. Even Israelis admit to that so this is no secret. Not to mention, when were these PA leaders elected by Palestinians democratically? Imagine forcing corrupt puppets on an oppressed people with no military, no air force, no navy or significant way to defend themselves and asking why don't they act decently? They acted exactly the way Israel wanted them to act.

  • @Hope-Film
    @Hope-Film 7 років тому +769

    "The apple doesn't fall far from The Orange" -John Oliver 2017

    • @hawkeye5955
      @hawkeye5955 7 років тому +16

      @Amal KHALIFA: The Orange juices itself just thinking about tasting that applesauce.

    • @CNWhatImSaiyan
      @CNWhatImSaiyan 7 років тому

      BLASSUSHJALAF!!!!

  • @BorksmithandTheBeef
    @BorksmithandTheBeef 7 років тому +269

    I don't know why when John dismisses things with "cool" it makes me crack up.

    • @mellennia9
      @mellennia9 7 років тому +4

      Vaunt D'ananas
      Its because its john oliver.😂

    • @marianjones8358
      @marianjones8358 9 місяців тому +4

      or "Dope." 🤣🤣🤣

  • @ctdieselnut
    @ctdieselnut 2 роки тому +85

    These two are the embodiment of the phrase, 'unburdened by genius.'

  • @haianhbuithi7264
    @haianhbuithi7264 7 років тому +291

    After this video the question of Jared's voice literally kept me awake.

    • @thats-too-salty
      @thats-too-salty 6 років тому +2

      ua-cam.com/video/W0SP0T9nS9A/v-deo.html

    • @TheRedRaccoonDog
      @TheRedRaccoonDog 5 років тому +2

      He doesn't have a voice. He only produces incomprehensible demonic screams when he opens his mouth.

  • @Sam-lq7qi
    @Sam-lq7qi 7 років тому +1684

    "The apple does not fall far from the orange." XD

    • @mrgodofmischief
      @mrgodofmischief 7 років тому +5

      the best joke xD

    • @ivy7312
      @ivy7312 7 років тому +1

      Нора Степанова do you know how to speak Svenska? you said "och och' that translates to "and and"
      lmfao google translate

    • @joeblack4436
      @joeblack4436 7 років тому +7

      He could have gone "peach does not fall far from the orange", but that would be almost as creepy as the things Trump says in relation to her.

    • @andslove88
      @andslove88 7 років тому +2

      put that on a t shirt

    • @quantumbubbles2106
      @quantumbubbles2106 7 років тому +1

      +Sam Senzek
      ROFLMAO - utterly epic!!!

  • @fandomguy8025
    @fandomguy8025 5 років тому +2199

    Man Ivanka is the QUEEN of non-answers. "What do you and your father disagree on?" Ivanka: "My father agrees with me on so many issues and on those we don't he knows where I stand".
    Thanks. That had zero informational content whatsoever. It was junk food in word form.

    • @3Rayfire
      @3Rayfire 5 років тому +138

      Sir, Junk Food is at least filling and delicious. That was a cheap stale plain rice cake in word form.

    • @Positivectrl
      @Positivectrl 5 років тому +40

      same as description of Jared, empty but sooo well served

    • @hrh4961
      @hrh4961 4 роки тому +16

      Her most valued position: America's Official Dumb Blonde Joke.

    • @enigmaPL
      @enigmaPL 4 роки тому +3

      @Fandom guy Would still smash.

    • @jp4431
      @jp4431 4 роки тому +10

      She'll make a great politician

  • @LolaLoander
    @LolaLoander 3 роки тому +69

    From time to time I have to rewatch all the episodes. John Oliver has helped me to endure up to now. God bless him and his Crew!

  • @aprilmazae4811
    @aprilmazae4811 7 років тому +1785

    "what's your favorite color?"
    "HITLER"
    I died laughing.

    • @eleanorcrews718
      @eleanorcrews718 7 років тому +6

      xD

    • @troycummings709
      @troycummings709 7 років тому +36

      You are gassing that joke up

    • @113dmg9
      @113dmg9 7 років тому +6

      Agreed. I did find myself laugh out loud on that comment.

    • @Loudgroaningjpeg
      @Loudgroaningjpeg 7 років тому +4

      David Harrison Are you actually serious with that comment? good lord dont trust melissa mccarthy on everything

    • @JennyLane8666
      @JennyLane8666 7 років тому +6

      smell that?.... it's sarcasm

  • @iAnasazi
    @iAnasazi 7 років тому +1355

    "But you need good, strong hands".
    What...this...I can't even...he's his own parody!

    • @bendamasta
      @bendamasta 7 років тому +11

      Anasazi lmao he actually said that, how insecure can you be about holding a piece of plastic. South Park aren't gonna joke about the president next season because real life is already a parody

    • @MotherOfOwlbears
      @MotherOfOwlbears 7 років тому +39

      Anasazi and he said that while struggling to hold it up. XD

    • @Sonichero151
      @Sonichero151 7 років тому +6

      Anasazi does that mean The Rockbiter is a valid candidate for president?

    • @checkmate6732
      @checkmate6732 7 років тому +1

      Карина Герасимова, move! -_-

    • @bloodstoneore4630
      @bloodstoneore4630 7 років тому +1

      is the virus in english?

  • @LomoPlateAldo
    @LomoPlateAldo 4 роки тому +567

    I do "the kushner" every day. People think that I am smart just because I don´t speak much.
    Most of the time I am just thinking of old Simpsons episodes and nodding with the head.

    • @saranghae2808
      @saranghae2808 3 роки тому +11

      😂😂😂😂 thanks for your honesty!

    • @fan9775
      @fan9775 3 роки тому +9

      Just like that Simpson episode.

    • @misslongfellow8988
      @misslongfellow8988 3 роки тому +5

      You’re also hot. Good on ya.

    • @davidfuentes9957
      @davidfuentes9957 3 роки тому +2

      Did you just describe me?

    • @Elrond_Hubbard_1
      @Elrond_Hubbard_1 3 роки тому +3

      I know you can read _my_ mind, boy
      Do do do do
      Do do do do
      Do do do do DOO do do do

  • @alaylaburkhart5940
    @alaylaburkhart5940 3 роки тому +287

    Jared's dad tried to Lifetime himself a revenge scheme against his brother before going to jail on tax evasion. This family is truly a work of art.

    • @selliott7043
      @selliott7043 3 роки тому +1

      @alailya burkhead
      Yea, Hironymous Bosch springs to mind!

    • @murphychurch8251
      @murphychurch8251 3 роки тому

      @s elliott 👏
      I've always been fascinated by the fact how weirdly modern Hieronymus Bosch's work looks. 😂😂

    • @melissawarner6528
      @melissawarner6528 3 роки тому

      Yeah a bleeding Picasso comes to mind

    • @Frank-x1g
      @Frank-x1g Рік тому

      Only the best people.

  • @sele123eri
    @sele123eri 7 років тому +557

    "the apple doesn't fall far from the orange " had me choking

  • @VintageRS
    @VintageRS 7 років тому +1546

    "the apple doesn't fall far from the orange" lol

    • @jb-sh2bk
      @jb-sh2bk 7 років тому +24

      that's was great

    • @karenferguson7926
      @karenferguson7926 7 років тому +1

      hahahahahahahahahahah....that's my first laugh of the day. OH...thank you. You're funny. Oh...Oliver is funny....but thx anyway.

    • @willows6114
      @willows6114 7 років тому

      Raven Stanton 😂😂😂

    • @smol_chilli_pepper
      @smol_chilli_pepper 7 років тому +4

      I choked on my water when he said that

    • @kristashafer93098
      @kristashafer93098 7 років тому +22

      1210Nique I learned pretty fast to NEVER try to eat or drink anything while watching John Oliver!

  • @Pos608
    @Pos608 7 років тому +66

    John oliver's web exclusive videos are the best thing that has ever happened. Ever.

  • @strangebird5974
    @strangebird5974 4 роки тому +86

    I return to this video every now and again to hear Jared's voice.

    • @schattentaenzerin
      @schattentaenzerin 4 роки тому +1

      You're not alone.
      Though I was severely disappointed when I first heard him speak in the news. John really got my hopes up.
      I still prefer this version

  • @libraryofalexander796
    @libraryofalexander796 7 років тому +1432

    Let's face it, the reason people want to believe she's a better person than her father is that she's good-looking. It's a universal human failing to confuse beauty (such as it is) with other virtues.

    • @rohe4077
      @rohe4077 7 років тому +69

      Library of Alexander I'm completely in agreement. But, being someone who likes decent human beings, I actually, and truthfully, find her appearance, repulsive. I don't even find her attractive because of who she is as a person.

    • @julietkatakanya5524
      @julietkatakanya5524 7 років тому +14

      Library of Alexander I don't see her beauty one mans meat is another man posion

    • @TheCanihavaname
      @TheCanihavaname 7 років тому +31

      Library of Alexander Yeah dude Bernie was mad THICC that's the only reason we like him

    • @richardsimpson9102
      @richardsimpson9102 7 років тому +20

      Most people are a better person than Trump, so you could well be insulting Ivanka. At least she hasn't indicated in interest in incest (like Daddy did).

    • @jspres86
      @jspres86 7 років тому +4

      Library of Alexander see I don't even think she's that good looking. She's way too skinny. I like some curves on my girls! Ivanka looks more like a weasel than a human being.

  • @1080TJ
    @1080TJ 7 років тому +2464

    tbh I get Ivanka and Melania confused half the time. And the way Donald talks about Ivanka isn't doing anything to help that.

    • @oops262686
      @oops262686 7 років тому +35

      TJ Hastie same here

    • @kmbassett7222
      @kmbassett7222 7 років тому +175

      It also doesn't help that Melania is young enough to be his daughter.

    • @finalbossoftheinternet6360
      @finalbossoftheinternet6360 7 років тому +163

      To be honest, Trump gets Ivanka and Melania confused all the time.
      He seems to think Ivanka is the First Lady, just because she's the one the lives in DC and sleeps with him.

    • @naniii7940
      @naniii7940 7 років тому +21

      TJ Hastie Like him wanting to have sex with her? Totally normal.

    • @tobiasboon346
      @tobiasboon346 7 років тому +51

      No need to be confuse, they're both his wives.

  • @mJC4698
    @mJC4698 7 років тому +3151

    well Jared did do something his dad always wanted but never could... Ivanka

    • @b.ashley9222
      @b.ashley9222 7 років тому +295

      M Clarke You sure about that? We don't know what goes on behind closed doors.

    • @jimsolo5739
      @jimsolo5739 7 років тому +98

      M Clarke: Donald took Ivanka's V-card.

    • @Greenmachine305
      @Greenmachine305 7 років тому +83

      Gonna agree with you guys. Trump is a sleaze.

    • @yrasphong
      @yrasphong 7 років тому +28

      M Clarke u got me dying laughing bro😂😅😅😂😅😅

    • @vaidehiraghavan
      @vaidehiraghavan 7 років тому +69

      Oh really? Why do you think Trump has given Jared lot of responsibilities? So creepy can have her. Whole family is a shit show.

  • @wendygreidanus8391
    @wendygreidanus8391 2 роки тому +28

    It's 2023 as I write this, 5 years after this commentary was published. With hindsight, we now know that there isn't a single human being who could ever have been a moderating influence on Trump, including Ivanka. It's amazing how accurate John Oliver's assessments of Trump et al. have been when you take a look back.

  • @jdas5842
    @jdas5842 7 років тому +2512

    "The apple does not fall far from the orange." 😂😂😂

    • @T-Rx
      @T-Rx 7 років тому +26

      I lost it when he said that!

    • @StevePlegge
      @StevePlegge 7 років тому +12

      "The ass doesn't fall far from the hole." - driftglass

    • @jamesadair7085
      @jamesadair7085 7 років тому +31

      That one was one of the best lines that i've heard in a long time.

    • @GreenDragon11
      @GreenDragon11 7 років тому +6

      James Adair I concur!!

    • @alexcuellar484
      @alexcuellar484 7 років тому +1

      😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

  • @dennischallinor8497
    @dennischallinor8497 4 роки тому +767

    Old Scottish Proverb: "It is better to remain silent and thought a fool than to open your mouth and remove all doubt." Any chance that might be the case here???

    • @lilRadRidinHood
      @lilRadRidinHood 4 роки тому +26

      And just about every country will claim that the phrase originated there. I've heard it's varied (debatable) source more often any other to be Samuel Clemmens, a.k.a. Mark Twain.

    • @gordonlever3369
      @gordonlever3369 4 роки тому +8

      Don’t forget Lincoln...

    • @jumatron2060
      @jumatron2060 4 роки тому +8

      I've heard that said in Yemen, Egypt and Jordan

    • @nacsincanada
      @nacsincanada 4 роки тому +1

      Doubt it

    • @salkin43
      @salkin43 4 роки тому +2

      Si tacuisses, philosophus mansisses

  • @emmatfink
    @emmatfink 4 роки тому +579

    Jared Kushner looks like the exact type of guy that would lead a group during the purge.

    • @malena5026
      @malena5026 4 роки тому +51

      Both of them look like the killer couple in the first purge movie

    • @scottysnintendoreviews3510
      @scottysnintendoreviews3510 3 роки тому +7

      Wait why does it hit different what happened

    • @Neilleeds
      @Neilleeds 3 роки тому +7

      They wouldn’t last 5 seconds in a purge .

    • @tonybill555
      @tonybill555 3 роки тому +1

      Hey Pretty how are you doing? I pray this message gets to you in a perfect state...

    • @carolw8579
      @carolw8579 2 роки тому

      Hell yeah.... wicked alien 👽 type

  • @Ryan-on5on
    @Ryan-on5on 2 роки тому +145

    Jared could quite literally be the most privileged man alive today. Just think of all the advantages and perks that fell into his lap by virtue of a fortunate birth:
    1: Brough up in a world of stupendous wealth and luxury as the intended heir apparent of his father's multibillion dollar New York real estate firm;
    2: Gained admission into America's top Ivy League institution as a result of his family's generous donation to the school ;
    3: Made manager of billion dollar real estate portfolios even before being handed his Harvard degree;
    4: Inexplicably married into a similar Manhattan real estate dynasty destined for great political fortune;
    5: Entrusted by his president father-in-law with executive duties he hadn't even the most minimum professional experience or qualifications to carry out;
    6: Became beneficiary of his affinal family's enrichment at American taxpayer's expense during Trump's one (God-willing!) term in office.
    I know unbridled nepotism runs high in the world of plutocrats, but this level of hereditary privilege is tacky by even the standards of British royalty!

    • @swervo4415
      @swervo4415 Рік тому +11

      Extremely well said!

    • @jackwenn_9693
      @jackwenn_9693 Рік тому +7

      word

    • @jackwenn_9693
      @jackwenn_9693 Рік тому

      @@swervo4415word

    • @chantelsieh3909
      @chantelsieh3909 6 місяців тому

      Yikes, I wouldnt want to be around the negativity, the dysfunction and costant self involved Trumps all of them sickos! They are the worst of the worst! Greedy pigs all of them!

  • @mystaminacantakethis
    @mystaminacantakethis 7 років тому +262

    I think a lot of it has to do with the tone she talks in. It fools people into thinking that the things she says are incredibly thought out and profound

    • @g0679
      @g0679 6 років тому +22

      Moni Pampeloni
      Profoundly superficial.

    • @jacquelinezimmerman38
      @jacquelinezimmerman38 5 років тому +15

      See, and I immediately think "bullshit artist" whenever I hear her speak.

    • @AbsentWithoutLeaving
      @AbsentWithoutLeaving 5 років тому +11

      She sounds like a badly programmed bot on anti-psychotics.

    • @thehellyousay
      @thehellyousay 5 років тому +1

      A good whore learns to speak soothingly, and neutrally so as to not anger the client, thus jeopardising both payment and physical health, and, indeed, bolstering his self-confidence, ensuring payment plus gratuity.
      And more sweaty old grunting man on top of her on a regular basis, at least til he bought Melania...

  • @bananatube6004
    @bananatube6004 7 років тому +560

    Damn John Oliver, back at it again with the raw truth

  • @cesararias2165
    @cesararias2165 4 роки тому +2005

    This show could be played again today and NOTHING would need to be changed.

    • @KittenUndercover
      @KittenUndercover 4 роки тому +132

      Not true - she and Kushy turned out to be a lot worse than we originally thought.

    • @cesararias2165
      @cesararias2165 4 роки тому +20

      Very true!

    • @darianbear5400
      @darianbear5400 4 роки тому +20

      Didn’t they bring peace to the Middle East though?

    • @Avalanche2908
      @Avalanche2908 4 роки тому +12

      No new wars in last 4 years and peace in middle east😂i heard the crowd laugh, sooo actually this video Aged “well”

    • @KittenUndercover
      @KittenUndercover 4 роки тому +61

      @@Avalanche2908 Lol..peace in the Middle East? No sweetie..that didn't happen.

  • @ctdieselnut
    @ctdieselnut 2 роки тому +69

    The list of things jared was tasked with was so broad and complex with so many totally different and unrelated objectives, that the best job ANY person could do is hire teams of experts assigned to each individually. His oversight of these teams would be intermittent and divided to the point of being spread so thin, you might as well eliminate him considering how little he could do with each. It's like trying to work 15 full time jobs simultaneously, and by end of the day, the only thing you accomplished was driving to each place's parking lot, turning around and leaving. Lol

    • @Guizambaldi
      @Guizambaldi Рік тому +1

      Yeah. And although it is clearly impossible for any human, including Nobel Prize winners with Elon Musk levels of effort and multitasking abilities, it is still very characteristic of Trump to think it is easy to solve anything. I think he truly believes everything is easy because to him it was.

    • @jakeklutts864
      @jakeklutts864 6 місяців тому

      And then he didn’t even do that 😅

  • @krombopulos_michael
    @krombopulos_michael 7 років тому +2485

    Why does anyone think Ivanka and Jared are like the "good guys" in the white house? Is it entirely based on them being pretty?

    • @Thedonutchan
      @Thedonutchan 7 років тому +289

      Krombopulos Michael At this point I think it's just the bar being set very low. like six feet under.

    • @nandoginkaku7610
      @nandoginkaku7610 7 років тому +133

      Krombopulos Michael i think it's the fact that they don't say the first thing on their mind like trump does. i may be wrong and you be completely right or so on

    • @TheLineCutter
      @TheLineCutter 7 років тому +62

      Krombopulos Michael yes. and they give you the impression that they are thinking. even though they probably are not. but thats better than Donald of whom we can be sure he isn't.
      well, he may be thinking about sex with his daughter ...
      (what a creep)

    • @nakenmil
      @nakenmil 7 років тому +55

      It's funny really, Trump's voters hate traditional politicians with a passion so they voted for a man who speaks his (irrational, frequently meandering) mind, but then everyone is super-happy when two people who follow the classic politician's playbook get back on the scene.

    • @justincastillogayray
      @justincastillogayray 7 років тому +23

      They don't follow the political playbook exactly. They play the Trump playbook but with a greater skilled appearance of dexterity.

  • @jesperjee
    @jesperjee 7 років тому +1391

    Nothing Ivanka says sound real and honest.

    • @anthonyl6185
      @anthonyl6185 7 років тому +22

      same with hillary

    • @jesperjee
      @jesperjee 7 років тому +72

      Lasted Fern Same with cheese. See? I too can make totally unrelated claims.

    • @Johncarver7777
      @Johncarver7777 7 років тому +2

      ...Unrelated with a hint of sexism

    • @anthonyl6185
      @anthonyl6185 7 років тому +6

      wait, cheese cant even speak. your claim truly is unrelated, while my claim compares 2 figures that (supposedly) are politically influencial

    • @360.Tapestry
      @360.Tapestry 7 років тому +5

      what the fuck is "influecial"? you must've gotten the red, squiggly underline, so what the fuck?

  • @CollinMcLean
    @CollinMcLean 7 років тому +173

    My cat, my dog, my spider, and this rock don't speak and only listen... Does that make them intelligent?

    • @Scrubjay457
      @Scrubjay457 7 років тому +24

      I don't know about your cat, dog, and/or spider, but that rock sound pretty intelligent.

    • @rat6143
      @rat6143 7 років тому +3

      jewish spider must be awesome

  • @kathylansford2142
    @kathylansford2142 3 роки тому +51

    I love this guy, John Oliver, he has a sense of humor and makes me laugh.

    • @tonybill555
      @tonybill555 3 роки тому +1

      Hey Pretty how are you doing? I pray this message gets to you in a perfect state....

    • @kathylansford2142
      @kathylansford2142 3 роки тому

      @@tonybill555 I am doing well.

    • @tonybill555
      @tonybill555 3 роки тому

      Okay

    • @tonybill555
      @tonybill555 3 роки тому

      I'm happy to hear that from you right now

    • @tonybill555
      @tonybill555 3 роки тому

      I really want to know you better and be close to you if you don't mind.

  • @logang_tadi1232
    @logang_tadi1232 7 років тому +144

    The apple does not fall far from the orange I'm dead😂😂😂

  • @captainzero1
    @captainzero1 4 роки тому +72

    “The Apple doesn’t fall very far from the Orange” is easily one of the funniest things ever said.

  • @nicholasmwangangi6257
    @nicholasmwangangi6257 7 років тому +2232

    At this rate the only person in the White house we'll trust is the Gardener

    • @sonnykennison3249
      @sonnykennison3249 7 років тому +113

      Nicholas Walker actually the gardener is Satan, with Trump in the White House he retired and is useing that job to pass the time

    • @garfreeek
      @garfreeek 7 років тому +2

      omg xD

    • @justincastillogayray
      @justincastillogayray 7 років тому +3

      I highly suggest you #followthehandles on Twitter. @shadowingtrump @angrywhstaffer Rogue WH Snr Advisor @RogueSNRadvisor @whitehouseleaky P.S. Find article on dailykos for @whitehouseleaky's first tweets from January

    • @linkeffect82
      @linkeffect82 7 років тому +37

      Who will be replaced in a few months time by a supermodel... probably.

    • @MisterSmith684
      @MisterSmith684 7 років тому +160

      Jared is the gardener too

  • @eddiaz93
    @eddiaz93 3 роки тому +20

    "Imagine anyone other than Donald Trump was President... Nice right?"
    2021 person here. Can confirm. It's very comfortable.

  • @Whatevsman27
    @Whatevsman27 7 років тому +2350

    Petition to refer to Jared Kushner exclusively as "The Kush"

  • @phoenixkitty8609
    @phoenixkitty8609 7 років тому +161

    Ivanka--- Word jumbles
    Jared---- Keep quiet and let the other person keep guessing

  • @chunkachocolat4611
    @chunkachocolat4611 7 років тому +3936

    "I was going to say sex..." My vomit just threw up even more vomit.

    • @alfalafelstine1536
      @alfalafelstine1536 7 років тому +297

      I cringed so much that I compressed into a black hole.

    • @pibblypob8067
      @pibblypob8067 7 років тому +177

      Never realized that Trump made that comment until now. What in the actual fuck?!?!

    • @natalied1844
      @natalied1844 7 років тому +2

      At what time in the clip was that shown

    • @usarice8726
      @usarice8726 7 років тому +3

      Wow Jonathan, great moves, moves keep it up proud of you

    • @whatsthatsupposedtomean3104
      @whatsthatsupposedtomean3104 7 років тому +3

      Oh great shit spams

  • @fortphoenix
    @fortphoenix 3 місяці тому +3

    John, my man... your work is utterly prophetic...

    • @gmx7424
      @gmx7424 3 місяці тому

      Here watching this after Trump's 2nd election too.... 🍊🤡

  • @CatskillOne
    @CatskillOne 7 років тому +359

    "Why should we hire you?"
    Me: I'm not Steve Bannon.

    • @WritersBlocked13
      @WritersBlocked13 7 років тому +67

      DH Shawon Me: if Betsy DeVos is qualified to run the Education Department, I'm qualified to do this.

    • @ropcnsaha7080
      @ropcnsaha7080 7 років тому

      , Morticai Andthemortys

    • @ropcnsaha7080
      @ropcnsaha7080 7 років тому

      +Morticai Andthemortys Z

    • @flyingsnake3737
      @flyingsnake3737 7 років тому +2

      Should i say this on my next job interview ?

    • @zap-ns1lu
      @zap-ns1lu 7 років тому +1

      Also to put on your college acceptance letter XD

  • @123sammyali
    @123sammyali 7 років тому +245

    Their nannies did a good job at raising Ivanka Trump. They must be so proud.

    • @rxjnnigafan123
      @rxjnnigafan123 7 років тому +29

      123sammyali their Mexican nanny....this is why America needs Mexicans

    • @rxjnnigafan123
      @rxjnnigafan123 7 років тому +5

      123sammyali who cares if it's True..... it's America..... if I "feel" she is Mexican then it's true....cuz that's how facts work here😂😂

    • @NEVER--MIND
      @NEVER--MIND 4 роки тому

      She can still give Daddy a hellofa lap dance!

  • @dcharles3666
    @dcharles3666 7 років тому +512

    President Obama went to Harvard and was President of the Harvard Law Review. However, his father-in-law questioned President Obama's education, can anyone believe the audacity? No knows how Jared even got there but Mr. Trump was ready to praise the fact that Jared went to Harvard.

    • @hthumbs4072
      @hthumbs4072 7 років тому +8

      D Charles Well Obama went to Occidental and then Harvard Law School

    • @frankpopper2176
      @frankpopper2176 7 років тому +22

      With Columbia in between.

    • @dcharles3666
      @dcharles3666 7 років тому

      You're right, and None of his off-spring learned the behavior. Thanks

    • @dcharles3666
      @dcharles3666 7 років тому +1

      You're right and None of his off-spring learned the behavior. Thanks

    • @darwincity
      @darwincity 7 років тому +1

      Hey, he thinks Gorka is a genius, and said Gorka probably does not have a Masters and got a PhD in abnormally simplistic conditions...

  • @henrysaizofficial
    @henrysaizofficial 3 роки тому +1

    The description of Steve Bannon is SO acurated and funny im dying here haha 20:08

  • @CraparellaSmorrebrod
    @CraparellaSmorrebrod 7 років тому +185

    3:40 "You said the only possible wrong answer to that question. What's you favorite color? - Hitler." Lol, laugh of the day.

  • @localeia1361
    @localeia1361 7 років тому +60

    POSSIBLY the funniest one Mr. Oliver has done yet.

    • @localeia1361
      @localeia1361 7 років тому +18

      i wrote this BEFORE the gilbert gotfried voice over. omg.

  • @solomonshv
    @solomonshv 7 років тому +538

    when donald said he had "sex" in common with his daugher, i took off my headphones and went to take a shot of tequila. i wasn't there or related to them and even i felt awkward as fuck

    • @ragnar97
      @ragnar97 7 років тому +51

      How does he know she likes sex as much as him? Do they talk about who they fuck and how much they enjoyed it while having dinner? Does that mean she'll divorce her husband to marry a younger one in a couple years? Does she go around grabbing guys by their dicks?SO MANY QUESTIONS!

    • @littleblueclovers
      @littleblueclovers 7 років тому +5

      slomoshv I had to pause it and practically mute the video just to get through it.

    • @MeganFebles
      @MeganFebles 7 років тому +3

      slomoshv this made me laugh so hard

    • @Meocross
      @Meocross 7 років тому +1

      Grab em by the Dussy!

    • @Tyler-yz5sd
      @Tyler-yz5sd 7 років тому +15

      "Sex"
      Fucking cringe
      Pause video, scroll to comments

  • @Dr_JSH
    @Dr_JSH 5 місяців тому +7

    Hiring Jared and Ivanka violated federal anti-nepotism law.
    That they were not paid is irrelevant.

  • @griachae5582
    @griachae5582 5 років тому +69

    I am watching this in late 2019 and a lot makes sense now

  • @ozaustin1
    @ozaustin1 5 років тому +59

    Every time I watch this video, I laugh until I hurt when Jared Kushner starts to speak with Gilbert’s voice. It is probably one of the best examples of taking the audience by surprise

  • @franciscovarela7127
    @franciscovarela7127 5 років тому +113

    John Oliver is the most perceptive of the late night entertainers. He’s very funny too.

  • @dhanvi768
    @dhanvi768 3 роки тому +8

    “ he found the only possible wrong answer to that question.
    What’s your favourite colour?
    - Hitler”
    Deddd🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @williamridgesr.6068
    @williamridgesr.6068 7 років тому +938

    Please keep Jared's hands away from the Veterans Administration. It took me too long to get my benefits, and I don't want anyone that has no idea what being a veteran is like changing policies in it.

    • @shoutarouhirashima4392
      @shoutarouhirashima4392 7 років тому +86

      I just want to stop by and say thank you for your service and it's damn shame benefits you deserve are so hard to maintain.

    • @woolfulrebellion
      @woolfulrebellion 7 років тому +27

      William Ridge Sr. Thank you for your service sir.

    • @Bakedbakedoyster17
      @Bakedbakedoyster17 7 років тому

      Thank you for your service but it is Obama to blame

    • @williamridgesr.6068
      @williamridgesr.6068 7 років тому +83

      Spicy Crabs Obama didn't do a perfect job, no president is perfect, but trump is a Narcissist moron with no class at all. The only thing trump wanted to be president was to go in the history book to feed his ego. He's trying to tear down everything Obama did to make him feel he's better than Obama, but it's not ever going to happen. Obama has class, trump is just crass. Obama never went around grabbing females by their pussy. You can by pro Republican, but are you willing to except an Orange Turd in the Punchbowl in the White House rather than admit you elected a Narcissist moron mad Manboy. If that's true, you are as bad as trump himself. I am not pro Republican or pro Democrat, I'm Anti Stupid.

    • @ookamitsk8104
      @ookamitsk8104 7 років тому +32

      I feel you there brother, I've been fighting for a year and a half now to get my benefits, I don't need this uphill struggle to get harder because they put someone in charge who has no idea what they are doing.

  • @OpinionsNoOneCaresAbout
    @OpinionsNoOneCaresAbout 7 років тому +1584

    So, Ivanka married a man who got into an Ivy League school even though he wasn't qualified, who had help from his daddy. I guess little girls really do fall in love with their fathers.

    • @vihaze6725
      @vihaze6725 7 років тому +123

      As much as I hate that moronic stereotype, it seems true in this case.

    • @hyperbiscuit2284
      @hyperbiscuit2284 7 років тому +52

      Freud for the win.

    • @jcobbs4523
      @jcobbs4523 7 років тому +84

      Apple didn't fall too far from the orange.

    • @BeeStBowie
      @BeeStBowie 6 років тому +2

      Scott Jewett OH SNAP

    • @qwerttzizzi
      @qwerttzizzi 6 років тому +1

      He wasnt qualified?

  • @jasperdracona
    @jasperdracona 4 роки тому +95

    I think its funny that that guy called Jared “Alexander Hamilton” and then called him quiet, as if Alexander wouldn’t scream one of his 100 page long essays from the roof tops. I find it hard to believe that AH was quiet.

    • @snowy_owl
      @snowy_owl 4 роки тому +17

      We literally get an entire song in the musical about how Hamilton should really just shut up and smile.

    • @MilloSpiegel
      @MilloSpiegel 3 роки тому +3

      @@snowy_owl Hamilton also always shared his opinion

    • @spongeintheshoe
      @spongeintheshoe Рік тому

      @@snowy_owl Keyword being “should.”

  • @mahmoods2134
    @mahmoods2134 3 роки тому +22

    “Every dark thought humanity has ever had, inhabiting the long-dead corpse of a Civil War-era plantation owner...”
    “I don’t doubt that there were a hundred people in a basement somewhere money-balling the ROI...”
    My two favorite jokes from this segment

  • @vihaze6725
    @vihaze6725 7 років тому +694

    In further news, Machiavelli has risen from the dead to sue Ivanka for plagiarism.

  • @TaylorKnightCosplay
    @TaylorKnightCosplay 7 років тому +640

    Have you heard of Ivanka's new perfume? It's called Complicit.

    • @msjkramey
      @msjkramey 7 років тому +22

      Taylor Knight "if being complicit means walking into the room carrying the gentle scent of sandalwood, violets, and rosewater... Then, yes, I'm *complicit*"

    • @shubham_dalvi
      @shubham_dalvi 7 років тому +1

      Sorry for off-topic. But your cosplay is dope. The best Harley Quinn ever seen

    • @drao0907
      @drao0907 7 років тому +1

      that snl sketch was Fucking hilarious 😂

    • @shubham_dalvi
      @shubham_dalvi 7 років тому +2

      +Dhruv Rao just saw that couple of days ago featuring Scarlett Johansson. I am quite hooked with SNL vids

    • @louieaye2511
      @louieaye2511 7 років тому +3

      trish shadwell well thankyou.have a bloody well day.

  • @Supernov4
    @Supernov4 7 років тому +43

    When you hear this family talk about how great something is, how smart someone is or how something is the best, you just know it doesn't mean anything. It's all air.

  • @puneeth6612
    @puneeth6612 2 роки тому +3

    My favourite thing in this Segment is the way John Oliver says DOPE

  • @kaufmanru
    @kaufmanru 4 роки тому +701

    It's remarkable just HOW on the mark John Oliver was about Ivanka & Jared. Their continued occupation of jobs in the While House may be even scarier than Oliver surmised three years ago! This episode has, sadly, weathered well.

    • @zachdancy5828
      @zachdancy5828 4 роки тому +13

      Dead on Right!!! These 2 have turned out to be Shitbags, like their family...

    • @WhiteDoveSam
      @WhiteDoveSam 4 роки тому +8

      @@zachdancy5828 What a shock, eh! 🙄

    • @michael0156
      @michael0156 4 роки тому +5

      The election of Donald Trump as President came from a deep loathing of the state of politics in 2016.
      I worked for the Obama campaign in 2012, reluctantly. I fell for the lessor of two evils game our politicians play every election year. I fell for it once... never again.
      Our system has become increasingly corrupt and unresponsive to citizen concerns since Reagan's election.
      Democratic administrations have been the worst, with the agendas of both the Clinton and Obama administrations being more radically Republican than Reagan.
      Out of that frustration was born the makings of a situation where I not only was not going to support Clinton for president in 2016, I voted for Donald Trump.
      My reasoning? I KNEW Clinton would be a terribly corrupt President, continuing the dismantling of our country's foundations and our Constitution, all while making decisions motivated by speaking circuit profits rather than public service.
      She demonstrated this after resigning as SOS.
      Before she finally declared her candidacy she pocketed nearly $25 million in speaking fees.
      This included over $1 million from 3 Canadian companies who wanted the Keystone pipeline put in.
      Clinton was our very first #PrePaidPrez, pre-paid president.
      Presidents, since Reagan, have made hundreds of millions from grateful wealthy people running corporations (here and around the world). Reagan infamously facilitated the dumping of Japanese steel in the USA, and was rewarded when he was paid for speaking in Japan. Paid for by Japanese steel front groups, for one speech Reagan was paid $2 million.
      We didn't need another known corrupt politician to replace the thoroughly corrupt Obama, now making tens of millions through the speaking circuit... the way our elected officials cash in on the favors they do for wealthy people while in office.
      So Ruth, your blind support of Oliver is sadly misplaced and based on ignorance, probably willing, of the entire political situation we are in.
      Try to get the whole picture through journalists... not MSNBC, not a comedian with an agenda, not CNN...
      Journalists and political activists, knowledgeable and honest and competent... Shane Smith, Glenn Greenwald, Mary Holland, Brooksley Born, Steve Kroft, Leslie Stahl, Sharyl Atkisson, Edward Snowden, Julian Assange (who should be pardoned before President Trump leaves office), John Stone, Jake Crosby, Robert Kennedy jr, Andrew Wakefield, Tucker Carlson (Yes, a Fox news correspondent who reports like a journalist) and soooo many others if you take the time to look.
      As always,
      For the protection of children,
      In the interests of truth and science,
      Michael Polidori

    • @Mijiraa
      @Mijiraa 4 роки тому +16

      @@michael0156 I'm sorry you feel that way. But even the most corrupt Democrat wouldn't have done the damage to your country and the world that Donald Trump and his Republicans did.

    • @michael0156
      @michael0156 4 роки тому +2

      @@Mijiraa
      Let's have a conversation.
      Please list the top three things that President Trump did that you say damaged the USA or the world.
      If you are European I can tell you some things he didn't do...
      1. Trump didn't add to the flood of refugees heading to Europe from the Middle East -
      BBC article on EU refugee crisis in 2015 -
      archive.li/3zXYO
      2. President Trump didn't cause the EU to pay Turkey to keep refugees in their country. (numerous stories available - here's one - Foreign Affairs Magazine - 2015 Syrian Refugees added to the 4 million in Turkey, arriving since 2011 -
      archive.li/UIPoH
      3. President Trump didn't cause the EU to fund a Libyan Coast Guard who cooperates with Europe to return all African refugees to Libya, where they are subjected to imprisonment, slavery, rape, torture or death.
      2019 Washington Times story on EU funding Libyan militias and Coast Guard to stop and/or return refugees to Libya, where human traffickers take over - archive.li/HpqnQ
      4. Turkey's President Erdogan has recently opened the flood gates of refugees to the EU as a result of the EU threatening sanctions over Turkey's actions in Syria.
      Who is responsible for the majority of refugee crises coming from the Middle East since before 2011? within the Middle East there are over 26 million displaced people, living in their country or neighboring countries. Over 5 million have tried to reach Europe, and have been stopped, by the EU... erecting, through a variety of expenditures, barriers to reaching Europe as effective as any wall being proposed by President Trump on the Mexican border. But these barriers have come at a cost in human suffering that will never be fully measured... only guessed at.
      Who is responsible? That would be President Obama, Vice-president O'Biden, and Secretary of State Hilary Clinton and their hawkish policies which deliberately disrupted dozens of nations in the Middle East, sending over 5,000,000 refugees and counting trying to reach Europe.
      What has President Trump accomplished in the Middle East?
      No new wars -
      And this - Dozens of stories are available on the internet about this - Here's one -
      Three nations sign peace accords with Israel, 5 more planning to follow - archive.li/mkpW3
      Let's see how long it takes O'Biden to screw this up and start new wars in the Middle East or elsewhere.
      This is just the tip of the iceberg of good things that President Trump has accomplished and a short listing of the very bad things a Nobel Peace Prize President did to destroy the lives of many millions of families in the Middle East, while waging incessant increasing wars throughout his presidency.
      As Always,
      For the protection of children,
      In the interests of truth and science,
      Michael Polidori
      I'm breathlessly waiting for the three most terrible things that President Trump did to the world and the USA.
      By the way, this corona virus crisis thing?
      Search for Executive Order 13295 to see how President Obama's modification to that order in 2014 caused our current fraudulent lock-downs.
      Other nations, like the Netherlands, also had their quarantinable diseases listings changed to add SARS or SARS-like respiratory illnesses.
      The European Doctors Alliance (actually ended up being a worldwide Doctors and health professionals Alliance) is calling for the removal of SARS from the disease lists and an end to the lock-downs.
      They have the support of over 100,000 medical professionals, researchers and activists worldwide... intelligent enough to recognize that although the virus exists, our governments' controlling actions are inexcusably unjustifiable and destroying our economies, livelihoods and lives of families and friends.
      As Always

  • @billyneville8579
    @billyneville8579 7 років тому +224

    Oliver just keeps getting better! This was GOLD😂

  • @anonmouse6337
    @anonmouse6337 7 років тому +291

    The fact that everyone projects positive traits onto them, shows how biased we are towards attractive people. You can bet people wouldn't automatically view them 'poised' and 'intelligent' if they looked like Donald Jr.

    • @sbaromski
      @sbaromski 7 років тому +39

      Annie Brown you are absolutely correct, and all caps guy, go the fuck home, you're drunk.

    • @Ammuze11
      @Ammuze11 7 років тому +1

      @Annie Brown
      To be fair, Stephen Hawking is a very respected and beloved person whom, no offense to him, doesn't really look like America's Next Top Model.
      So, yeah. A lot of times, a good looking person is seen as someone who can be a likable person because "reasons" but there are also people who don't look so good and are really respected.

    • @SaxeGotha
      @SaxeGotha 7 років тому +18

      Hawking himself has talked about the "blind oracle" perception that some people have. You have a big loss in one field and suddenly people regard you as more talented in unrelated fields. Some of his fellow scientists have also quietly grumbled that he wouldn't be such a super star if he didn't have a disease, but since they probably agree he deserves a break and know Stephen didn't ask for it, they don't make a big issue out of it.
      So this is just a long-winded way of saying that people judge on superficial qualities. We project good qualities onto attractive people, and negative qualities on unattractive people, but the "blind oracle" phenomenon also exists for disabled or severely disfigured individuals.

    • @ehinton4006
      @ehinton4006 7 років тому +6

      Ammuze this is just an awful comparison. SH has done miraculous things and is clearly the smartest known person on planet earth.

    • @booley
      @booley 7 років тому +4

      though to be also fair, Stephen Hawking has spent decades proving he is one of the most intelligent men in the world.
      even prejudice can only go so far.

  • @TheSharkIsWorking_23
    @TheSharkIsWorking_23 2 роки тому +12

    RIP Gilbert Gottfried, such an iconic and unique voice…unlike Jared’s. 12:38 is damn CLASSIC

  • @TyNg-wm8ef
    @TyNg-wm8ef 5 років тому +66

    "He's like Hamilton, he listens...."
    Hamilton:

    • @eukulm2987
      @eukulm2987 4 роки тому +5

      Bright young man
      Hey who the f is this

  • @oganotluibov
    @oganotluibov 7 років тому +341

    This is phenomenal work! I want to see and applaud the whole team--the smart and clever people who did the research, wrote the jokes, and give us insightful commentary! May be I am wrong, but this (any) show is the work of a team of people, and if so I want to give them credit.

    • @ElFonzieG13
      @ElFonzieG13 7 років тому +5

      Watch the show on HBO so you can read the credits you pleb.

    • @AFish2297
      @AFish2297 7 років тому +4

      No, you're not wrong. John Oliver often mentions how much work his whole team does to achieve the quality they have on each episode that is aired.

    • @esprit15d
      @esprit15d 7 років тому +2

      This is the segment he should submit for Emmy consideration next year.

  • @katgreen2108
    @katgreen2108 7 років тому +626

    He's the Alexander Hamilton of the Trump Presidency????
    More like Aaron Burr.
    *TALK LESS, SMILE MORE, DON'T LET THEM KNOW WHAT YOU'RE AGAINST OR WHAT YOU'RE FOR*

    • @LovelyIKnowx
      @LovelyIKnowx 7 років тому +47

      Kat Green Literally about to say that... I was so confused when the guy compared him to Hamilton in that he doesn't talk a lot. Like...???

    • @katgreen2108
      @katgreen2108 7 років тому +33

      LovelyIKnowx like this is the dude who was supposed to write a fraction of 25 papers and ended up writing 51 like wtf you mean he doesn't talk much!

    • @thanatos61
      @thanatos61 7 років тому +10

      Kat Green writing does not equal talking but he did talk a lot

    • @StephanieRoestel
      @StephanieRoestel 7 років тому +17

      Kat Green THATS WHAT IM SAYING!! Jared is NOT Hamilton! If anything, he's Burr.

    • @ab-zd3ue
      @ab-zd3ue 7 років тому +1

      .

  • @kk0511
    @kk0511 3 роки тому +12

    2:00 Audience reaction to his responsibilities is hilarious

  • @evelee9163
    @evelee9163 4 роки тому +255

    In light of the covid response that Jared was in charge of (specifically getting testing kits and distributing ventilators at the beginning), this has certainly aged well.

    • @ispartacus1337
      @ispartacus1337 4 роки тому +5

      I gotta give credit where it's due. Hospitals that needed ventilators got them. I didnt hear about any that needed them and didn't receive them. Correct me if I'm wrong.

    • @JuliaBl
      @JuliaBl 4 роки тому +4

      I, Spartacus let’s hope it’s enough for the coming ordeal.

    • @ispartacus1337
      @ispartacus1337 4 роки тому +8

      @@JuliaBl hopefully.i cant stand Trump or any of his little buddies. But they did make sure hospitals had what they needed in the beginning. The response should not have been necessary though it's only because of his administration's failure to respond to the virus that we needed the amount of equipment in the first place.

  • @protovibration7633
    @protovibration7633 7 років тому +223

    ROY G. BIVH
    Red
    Orange
    Yellow
    Green
    Blue
    Indigo
    Violet
    Hitler

    • @jdevaughn42
      @jdevaughn42 7 років тому +15

      Vast Dragon hitler is now part of the visual spectrum

    • @dustfreequeen5151
      @dustfreequeen5151 6 років тому

      Vast Dragon 🤣

  • @Scorch428
    @Scorch428 6 років тому +201

    The reason Trump tasked Jared with such huge tasks is so when they dont pan out, he has someone to blame.
    "Oh, I'm sorry Jared couldnt make that happen. I should have done it myself"
    Its sad that Jared wasnt smart enough to figure this out...

    • @g0679
      @g0679 6 років тому +9

      Scorch428
      Jared isn’t smart? I’m devastated.

    • @thighland1013
      @thighland1013 5 років тому

      Scorch428 I was thinking the EXACT same thing. Sadly, he probably did know. But let’s be honest, who are we going to point fingers at when things go wrong no matter what... Trump. Good/Bad thing is, no matter what happens between 2016-2020, we will probably blame everything bad that happens in America on Trump. That’s how we complain😂🤷‍♀️ Does that make sense? No? Alright same

    • @247shaky
      @247shaky 5 років тому +1

      Scorch428 No it was probably so he could be alone with Ivanka.

    • @alfredcardona4943
      @alfredcardona4943 5 років тому

      Not only that, but it keeps Jared busy so daddy can spend more "time" with his daughter.

    • @HowToChangeName
      @HowToChangeName 2 роки тому

      But why throw fresh face under the bus while he had Eric and Tiffany?

  • @JeffSmithbureau13
    @JeffSmithbureau13 2 роки тому +5

    Came back here for the Kushner voice bit which will just never get old. RIP Gilbert

  • @PsychShrew
    @PsychShrew 4 роки тому +58

    "I am making enormous progress in the art of saying nothing in a great many words." - Otto von Bismarck

  • @softly3359
    @softly3359 5 років тому +532

    "he's like Alexander Hamilton, he's a great listener-"
    Wasn't he known to just...not shut up?

  • @autisticsmartass433
    @autisticsmartass433 7 років тому +220

    Thank you John Oliver, for being one of few people online knowing who to attack, why to attack them, and creating an argument to support your attack.

    • @studywithnerdsfrancais1821
      @studywithnerdsfrancais1821 7 років тому +15

      I don't think he even attacks. He just describes.

    • @alexanderm3504
      @alexanderm3504 7 років тому +3

      Tt Slasher He's given a script and reads it.
      Thank the many writers in the shadow

    • @skyguy8786
      @skyguy8786 7 років тому +3

      He writes his script as well.

    • @foggianism
      @foggianism 7 років тому

      Tt Slasher very good explaination. you bring on point why this is such a good show.

    • @autisticsmartass433
      @autisticsmartass433 7 років тому

      No, he attacks. He has a clear agenda and criticizes those who go against it. However, he has his reasons, cites his sources, and knows when to attack the leader and when to attack the followers. He doesn't call Trump supporters idiots for what Trump is doing because that makes no sense; they aren't controlling him.

  • @BeerElf66
    @BeerElf66 3 роки тому +10

    I don't know why, but Jared Kushner has really cold eyes, as if he's assessing people for a good match with wine when he cooks them.

  • @Coco-rt3kn
    @Coco-rt3kn 4 роки тому +215

    Apparently lying is a very strong genetic trait amongst the First Family of GRIFTERS.

    • @eveny119
      @eveny119 4 роки тому +2

      And to write a book praising it, shes got balls!

    • @michaelkolhaas4641
      @michaelkolhaas4641 4 роки тому +2

      Jokes aside, psychopathy is partially inheritable: Fred, Donald, Ivanka.

    • @philip8498
      @philip8498 4 роки тому +1

      I mean jared isnt even related to any of them

  • @marlynbadza5842
    @marlynbadza5842 7 років тому +982

    why does it look like America has a royal family. you guys are screwed

    • @ramius4689
      @ramius4689 7 років тому +29

      True. But if we're screwed it means you're screwed too, wherever you happen to be. My personal apologies.

    • @yoyomanga3721
      @yoyomanga3721 7 років тому +2

      Marko Ramius how's that he'll be screwed wherever he is?

    • @ramius4689
      @ramius4689 7 років тому +38

      We could randomly attack his country based on false intelligence for one.

    • @justinthompson6364
      @justinthompson6364 7 років тому +67

      America is a powerful country. That means if we fuck up, we fuck up big.

    • @irenemadrid3379
      @irenemadrid3379 7 років тому +14

      Opposite of a royal family..

  • @gswdeclan
    @gswdeclan 4 роки тому +78

    We're the same age, so if we didn't apply to Harvard the same year, it was a year apart. I had an interview, didn't make it. Of course my dad didn't have 2.5 mil lying around.

  • @JackSears95
    @JackSears95 2 роки тому +11

    12:36 oof, I wasn't ready to hear Mr. Gottfried again so soon. Rest in piece, Iago.

  • @michaelknapp8961
    @michaelknapp8961 5 років тому +464

    Apparently the smartest guy in Kushner s high school didn’t get into Harvard but a below par student like Jared did! It pays to have s rich daddy.

    • @247shaky
      @247shaky 5 років тому +20

      Michael Knapp That sure devalued a Harvard education.

    • @moow950
      @moow950 4 роки тому +7

      A criminal daddy

    • @HowToChangeName
      @HowToChangeName 2 роки тому

      Maybe Harvard is the lowest expectation in entire school, that or he paid his entry fee

    • @michaelknapp8961
      @michaelknapp8961 2 роки тому

      @@HowToChangeName it was his daddy. Daddy Kushner paid a shit load of money to get Jared in. It’s true.

  • @jcgrldn9570
    @jcgrldn9570 4 роки тому +50

    Watching this for the last time, because we need to say goodbye to Ivanka and Jared on January 20, 2021.

  • @daleanolan1464
    @daleanolan1464 5 років тому +75

    Her voice makes my skin crawl.

    • @manilamanila9620
      @manilamanila9620 4 роки тому +7

      Her breathless voice reminds me of that psychopath conwoman imitating Steve job and pretending to invent new ways to testing blood

    • @robinholbrook6576
      @robinholbrook6576 4 роки тому +1

      Like a talking Barbie

  • @MFYouTube683
    @MFYouTube683 4 роки тому +2

    I have watched this at least 60 times. Brilliant.