I was in my 9th month, doing laundry when my baby started moving around in what seemed frantic to me. It was also a time of day he wasn't usually very active. I just knew he was in distress so immediately went to the hospital where they put a monitor on me and suddenly my Obgyn was in the room saying I needed a C-section. My son was born but needed respiratory treatment but he was fine, however turns out his umbilical cord was not only around his neck but had a knot in it! I was certain this was the reason for his increased frantic movements, so yes, increased activity can be a serious sign baby is in distress. It's impossible to know anything for certain. I was never made aware that increased activity could be a problem. I was just lucky. You are NOT to blame. It is not your fault sweet mamma and you have saved lives by posting your experience.
I just found ur videos & I am going back to watch them. Im so sorry for ur loss. My mother whose middle name is Kaja lost a set of twin girls & the drs didn’t do anything to prevent it when the first one went into distress during labor. She ended up delivering both of them stillborn & there was no attempt to intervene & do an emergency c-section or anything else to save them. My mother said it was devastating & u never get over it u just learn to live w the loss. So sad.
As a future L&D nurse, I promise I will watch out for this, and will go against every person in that hospital to get momma and checked out, possibly saving babies, and families from heartbreak like so you and many others had/have to go through. I'm so sorry for your loss, momma. 💔
I was able to talk with the nursing students in my class at school about how to treat a mom who had a stillborn because i still feel that they try and stay away from the moms who lose babies just because they dont know what to say. So I tried to add comfort to the situation. Cause all I got was a butterfly on my closed door afterwards. It was very lonely. @@RedRoseSeptember22
Thank you. I have never had a stillbirth, but my grandmother and my sister did. You can make a difference by listening to these women, just like Stefani is by making women aware of this, because she's right. They don't tell you this at your prenatal appointments. Thank you.
I am in med school, interested in specializing in gynecology. Thank you for sharing your story. I will try to be as informed as possible so I will never unknowingly cause such a tragedy.
I’m in the uk & I’m SO thankful that my midwife made it very clear to me that any change in movement including increased needs to be checked out asap. At 38 weeks I had one episode of decreased movement so I went in to be monitored and all was ok but the following week (39 weeks) I had an episode of increased movement so I went back in and turns out my placenta was basically failing and they had to induce me straight away. My little girl was in massive distress ( extremely low heart rate) and came out not breathing. Long story short the amazing team got her breathing and she was healthy, but honestly if I didn’t know thanks to my midwife that an increase in movement is just as serious as a decrease, I’m not sure I would have my 4 year old daughter next to me right now
I’m in Scotland and I’m the same. I’m constantly told and see posters all over the hospital saying “any change in movement needs to be checked” and “your movements shouldn’t change even as your baby gets bigger”, I hear a lot of people saying “my baby must be running out of room” which just isn’t true!!
Stefani, because of you, Kaia is saving the lives of so many babies! Her life still, and will always have, meaning. She was perfect and beautiful. I know that she is so proud of you and Kameron! My best friend lost her daughter at 7 months gestation. I asked her about increased movement before she lost Abby. She said yes, she felt it, too. I told her about your channel, and she believes, as I do, that you're doing a wonderful thing by telling women about this. What a wonderful way to honor Kaia!
Our daughter was stillborn at 41 weeks. The day before I realised something was wrong she went crazy in my tummy, I thought I’d drunk to much fizzy drink which made her move an insane amount, more than normal, but I realised when we were told she had no heartbeat that she had been very, very distressed that night. Her cord was wrapped round her neck and consequently she was stillborn. I remember those distressed movements to this day, the guilt that somehow I should have known. Stay strong but grieve for your daughter. You have highlighted the importance of increased movement of babies. I’ve never heard anyone speak about this before, thank you xx Grace Louise 30/10/1993
I'm so so so sorry this happened to you, too. 💔 *Never* have I ever heard more activity being a negative thing. I am hoping by sharing, more mamas will know to look out for an increase in movement. So sorry you are part of this horrible club, mama. 😭
Yes my daughter's teacher just lost her precious son and they do say increase movement is a warning sign, at least when I was pregnant with my rainbow daughter I was told that, I would get so scared Everytime she was very active, it terrified me
@@catherinerothe4374 what is wrong with you? I guarantee you wouldn't walk up to a grieving mother showing pictures of her sleeping baby and say some shit like that so don't come up on this grieving mother's platform and say it hiding behind a screen! People like you make me sick.
I’m so sorry, Hun. I lost my son when he was 22 years old. I also feel like he was failed by the health care system. Also by insurance, the government, society, family, and even us, as parents. Totally different circumstances. I just wanted to leave you a message so you know you’re not alone. Grieving mothers are a special type of misery. Much love and healing 💜
I just stumbled on to your site, after experiencing a miscarriage, just looking for support. First off, my heart goes out to you, and your family for experiencing such a deep profound loss. There are no words, and I pray for you, for strength and healing. Secondly, I cannot agree with you more that there is not enough education and research devoted to STOPPING THIS FROM HAPPENING! Yes, some things cannot be explained, but this is such a ripe learning opportunity for the medical field. And I commend you, for taking matters in to your own hands to educate yourself and others, and to TRULY ADVOCATE for this extraordinary cause. Together, hopefully, one day we will figure out this mystery, so that no one will ever have to go through this kind of loss again 💘
I can’t remember where I read or heard about a sudden increase in movement being a potential sign of distress, but I know I did. Later in my pregnancy, I changed from an OB to midwife because my care was so terrible and she would brush off any concern I had. My new midwife also cautioned me about increased movement as well. I kept it in the back of my mind during my pregnancy. Thank you for putting this video out there, parents need to know! I’m so sorry about your sweet daughter. 🤍
I agree that midwifery care exceeds OB care. I had midwives with my first but ended up going into preterm labor and had to give birth at hospital with an OB. With my second I was considered high risk so I had an OB straight away. After switching doctors 3 times because I wasn’t receiving high quality care I ended up saying fuck it and getting a midwife even though there was a higher chance of me having a baby preterm again. I ended up making it to 39 weeks and had my baby at home with the most amazing midwife. I literally could call her anytime. We are so close now and she always gave me the utmost care.
My son was stillborn almost a month ago. I was 36 weeks pregnant at the time. :'( I"m also struggling with the thoughts of 'maybe I could have saved him'. Since in the last couple of weeks, I had noticed a decrease in movements.... my boy was always so so active, and even with the decrease in movements, he would still easily pass a kick counter. I just felt a bit weird/uncomfortable (which everyone says they feel at the end of pregnancy). We were both completely healthy and the entire pregnancy had been smooth. I don't blame the doctors for what happened, but at the time they assured me that our Rowan was fine, they said he was just getting too big to move about as much as he did previously. My friends and family with multiple kids said the same thing. It's possible that he was fine up until the last night I went to bed... it's also possible that something really was wrong a couple of weeks before. Either way, you expect a virtually full-term baby to be fine unless you notice bleeding or something. Super hard for people in our position to accept that it's really not out fault... just a horrific thing that happened. :( I'm still trying to work out how to live without him... so sorry you and other people are going through the same thing.
I’m a midwife in Sweden. In midwifery-school we talked about this quite a bit during a lecture about stillbirth. Any change in the patterns and amounts of movements should be taken seriously. I believe the research on this is quite new, and unfortunately not all medical education is the same. I’m really sorry for your loss, thank you for spreading awareness on this.
I was reading that USA has one of the highest stillbirth and infant mortality rates in the developed world. 😔 I hope we can catch up, because when I asked my doctor about her increase in movement he said,"there is no evidence that it's related to distress." 😑
I got pregnant while working in Sweden on a short term contract. I visited a midwife clinic for check ups and was very impressed how well educated my midwife was, much better than the midwife I got in Germany upon my return. You’ve got an excellent system.
I currently live in the UK and lived in Switzerland before, in both countries my midwives insisted that any significant change in movement patterns deserved being assessed. Mums know their babies and should be listened to at all times. I'm sorry Stephanie for your loss.
I was high-risk, had diabetes, had placenta previa, 35+ years old and I am in Sweden. All my routine appointments went fine joking about how my baby is underweight MAY BE because I am short, untill one morning at 37+5 week my baby stopped moving...... I can't explain what I am going through even after 13 months.... I do sometime want to shout to the healthcare system and say, I don't want your sympati after something goes wrong. I don't want you to say oh, I am sorry but, you are still young. Why don't you try not to put a woman to go through this trauma that would haunt her for rest of her life in the first place?
Currently pregnant and I am sending you all of my love. I can’t imagine how this would impact your life. Thank you for sharing this video as I’ve never been told anything about increased movement. I’m sure this was hard to share, so thank you so much
It was four years this past May since my daughter was stillborn at 38 weeks. The day before there was reduced movement, then that evening when going to bed, an insane amount of abnormal movement. I woke up in the middle of the night, and I knew she was gone. I still struggle so much with guilt and the what if’s. Even though it’s been four years, your grief resonates with me, and I can relate so much. I am so sorry for your loss. I see you. Hugs and prayers.
I should also mention I have had two babies since and was definitely labeled “high risk.” The daughter I lost was my fifth baby, so I had four healthy babies prior and two afterwards.
I am so so sorry this happened to you your partner and baby girl. I am a Midwife in Australia and this is one of the things we tell our women to look out for. You are right. There isn’t enough information out there for women and health professionals. You are amazing to put this video out for others. I hope that you can find some small comfort in knowing you will save babies by this selfless gift. ❤️
Sounds to me like the US needs to get their shit together. This is simple education that could save our childrens lives. Stefanie I completely understand your anger and frustration🤬
Please be the change every single woman so desperately needs! Don't ever stop educating, learning and sharing your story! It's important! You matter and your baby girl mattered! I pray you find the peace and inner strength you need to let this be your new calling! ❤
Condolences to you and yours on this tragic loss. And yes, you are so right. Why would the doctor/hospital, etc. not check out an increase in movement shortly before birth? Especially since baby movements usually decrease at this time? This was exactly my experience (3 children), to the point that I would be concerned due to lack of movement, at least with one of them. Why not do an ultrasound as a matter of course shortly before birth to see that everything looks good? For example, if the cord is well placed and the placenta still in good shape? I recall how the doctor and the nurses commented on my son's cord length - it was so long. He could have wrapped it around himself at least three times. I recall also when it was a "must" to place babies on their tummy for sleeping, and everyone did this. Now you place them on their back, because the US had so many infant crib deaths, and it was determined that the babies just did not get enough air in this position. Medicine is not infallible. Always trust your instinct. God's blessings to you.
I blame lack of education and research and most of all I blame how much insurance companies play a role in the type and amount of care patients receive. Love your channel sweetie, you are doing amazing.
I was just discussing this with my friend who is an RN! Insurance was such a battle for me to even get an anatomy scan. I can't imagine the hoops they make people go through for NST or BPP. 😔 My baby could still be here if BPP/NST was a given for all pregnancies.
I totally agree..and the doctors go along with it I had a really good obg that didn't follow the that they still have me regular ultrasound and check ups it saved my twins
Wow. I have never heard of this before and now I’m pissed , it’s always decreased movement that they say to get checked out. Thank you for sharing this with us , as hard as it is, you are making a difference . I believe Kaia will save lives with this , she needed her Mommy to share with others. I am 5 weeks pp and currently on an app for pregnancy . I will share with others what you have mentioned , just to bring more awareness to them and tell anyone to get it checked out if they experience this. Sending you hugs and love .
Not sure how I ended up here but your story really hit home for me. My mother, at the age of 16, carried a baby full term. A couple of days before her birth she felt like she peed a lot. So she went to her doctor who dismissed her and told her nothing was wrong and she shouldnt worry so much. Turned out she had a little hole in the placenta and my sister 'dried' up and died. My mom had told the doctor that movement was less and yet again she was send home. but the biggest problem about this all { was back in the 70's} was that my mother after giving birth was not allowed to hold her. She was taken away but in a box and my mom was told that she was still young and would have kids later on, so she didnt need to worry about her. How the F can you say that to anyone?? Different times they say now. I noticed when my mom got older that it started to burden on her. She was seeing people like you two, who had the oppurtunity to say goodbye, to hold your baby, to make pictures and so so much more. I told my mom 'Mom you are not the only one, there must have been more women of your age that have gone through the same as you' So we made a post on facebook. The reactions went through the roof!! so many women have had the same experience. Together with a lot of these women my mother has raised money and they asked an artist to make a sculpture for all the stillborn babys and mothers that where treated this way. It is my moms mission to have a sculpture on every gravesite here in the Netherlands. I am so glad that times have changed and as a mother of two I cannot imagine what you and my mom have had to go through but I thank you for making it an 'open topic'
My first child my daugher was overactive and she was completely healthy when she was born.my boys in 2nd and 3rx pregnancy they were very sleepy no movements and they are healthy too.all of the with the cord around their neck.you can never now when your baby is safe or not inside you.only from the heartbeat in the ultrasound. Don't blame your self.you did your best
I had increase in movement too and lost my son and also feel like I missed the sign to save my son! Thank you for sharing this. I feel your pain and agree something needs to be changed!! My baby was perfect and is not here either. It's so damn heartbreaking and we need to raise awareness 💔
I am so very sorry for the loss of your little girl. Almost twenty-one years ago, I lost my third child, a baby son, due to stillbirth. He was at just twenty-two weeks gestation, but my experience was similar. Patrick had been quite active since I first felt his movement. Yet, the night when he passed away, he kicked so strongly that he felt as if he were a full-term baby. This memory still grieves me, as afterward I understood that he must have been in his death throes at that time. He was delivered about a week later with his umbilical cord wrapped tightly and knotted around his neck. Though our baby Patrick was too tiny to have been saved, it still breaks my heart that I was unable to help him. The womb is supposed to be the safest place. Please know that though your baby’s loss will always be with you, it does become easier to bear with time. So glad to learn of your current pregnancy, and thank you for raising awareness of this symptom of increased fetal movement ❤️
Late to this video but newly pregnant and thankful that you’re spreading awareness. It’s better that we advocate for our baby’s than to worry we are being too “anxious”. So sorry for your loss but thank you again for trying to use your knowledge to help others
Hi beautiful mama! Listen, if it helps you (or anyone), I had two horrible pregnancies with severe hyperemesis and the first ending in preeclampsia. My daughter nearly died during delivery and I’m pretty sure I might have as well. I had decreased movement with my daughter, my first, and fought with an OB nurse at 3 AM at 36 weeks, after being so sick, knowing in my gut she felt like dead weight and was not okay. They were pissed that I called. They wouldn’t see me. She lived. At my next checkup, 40 weeks to the day, I was induced immediately for sky high BP. I am healthy as a horse. Active, 5’8”, broad, fit. I don’t smoke, I eat well, did everything right, etc, there was NO reason I should not have had a perfect delivery. But we both came close to losing our lives. My son had increased activity which decreased the last week before birth. He was almost ten pounds with an umbilical cord as thick as my arm almost! No issues. None. Even with the signs of distress. Yet, my daughter very well could have died. This is the point: Sometimes, you just can’t know. It’s not you. I did everything right, everything. I was so fit and healthy with my first, but we both came so close to death. Sometimes you can do everything right but that one thing no one can possibly explain, that two minutes no one can recapture, goes all wrong. I was a couple pushes (or a couple minutes) away from losing my daughter. I simply got lucky. Period. It could have happened to me. That haunts me every day and I am absolutely grateful. Years later, I threw myself in front of a truck that was heading for my son when he was two. It didn’t hit him but it was seconds away. Seconds. I was lucky. He was lucky. That’s it. My point is, and I’m crying as I write, we don’t always have control. Terrible things happen to good people, and to you, or anyone else who has suffered such an unspeakable loss, I am so sorry. As a human and as a mother, I am so sorry. And it was NOT your fault. Sending love.
Stefani, you are making a difference. Kaia will save other babies because of you. She matters! You and Kameron matter! Kaia was absolutely beautiful and she should be here today. That's a fact. In loving memory of Kaia Olivia Moise Phillip Reid Haynes Abigail Wynona Torrence And every baby who fell asleep in the arms of Jesus before they were born. We see you. And for the parents who have to live every day without you. We see you. We pray for you.
I’m 49 and have had 3 kiddos. My oldest is 21. Baby Becoming overactive was something my OB-GYN talked about back in 2000. I’m very concerned that they don’t stress this more now. Spread the word, sweet girl! My husband is a pediatrician and even he thinks the healthcare system sucks here. Fortunately, he’s one of the good guys and stick by his Hippocratic oath and NEVER turns a patient away, regardless of insurance.
I wonder how you determine baby is overactive? Because I've known pregnant women who mentioned the baby was kicking a lot and just assumed it was normal. How can you tell if it's too much?
In my country, we are told that increased movement can be a sign of distress. We also have a class in our ante natal classes about what happens in a stillbirth, even down to what the baby is likely to look like if it passed a long time before birth. That was a sad night.
The one thing I can add is thru my pregnancies I would get about a 6 month size and stop growing, I felt no movement prior to finding no heartbeat. My family had opted I not see my babies and Ive hated them for that all these years, I wanted to see what they looked like, I wanted to hold them, It was until today I heard your story that I came to peace with maybe not seeing them was the best. Thank you for sharing your story❤️
Dear Stefanie, I see you. I am so sorry for your loss. You are very brave to speak about everything. I wish you all the best greetings from Austria 💜💜💜🐈
I am so glad to hear someone SPEAK out loud about our health care system failing people who are putting their trust in them to care for them or there loved ones and to not brush us off or not take us seriously! You can have a great doctor who is limited on how they can handle your care because of red tape and dollar signs!
4 days before my due date , at night my baby moved like a man woman. She did NOT move that way at all towards my last weeks of pregnancy so immediately just in my heart I knew I had to RUN to the hospital. I left everyone still asleep and drove myself immediately because I did not want anyone to make me wait any longer. I go and get checked in, and the nurse LAUGHS at me and says I’m over reacting, the DOCTOR tells me increase in movement is NEVER a concern. I call bullshit. My baby happened to be just fine, thank god. But the fact I was laughed at, told it was NORMAL, and could’ve been easily turned away if I hadn’t forced them to monitor the babies heart rate and my contractions. Please if you feel ANY CHANGE any uncomforting feeling, GO with your GUT!
Any doctor or medical staff laughing at or minimizing someone’s concern even if it is a gut feeling and even if it’s wrong is essentially failure. The mom is the most familiar with the fetal growth and movement patterns and if something happens radically unfamiliar I would be panicked and want a check on the fetal health also. I don’t know why this is scoffed at. Women being scared, panicked, even if it’s often means they have a concern for their growing and obviously very fragile small body and organs and tissues and systems that are newly formed and at risk of damage or malfunction. It’s not bad to be scared or cautious or nervous or want to check more often. I feel like the regular scheduled checks should be the minimum checks but checking more often as needed whether by doctor/nurse/radiologist or mom concerns. The fact that babies have high movement before demise makes sense and is like an alarm system. Moms being expected to downplay their gut feeling or connection to their baby and further being made fun of as if it’s just a cute mommy nerves thing is a throwback to men being the doctors. Women docs doing this is even worse bc we think women will be more in touch with us and our bodies. It’s terrible and to me criminal to laugh, to downplay or worse yet to send someone home with no checking. It’s negligent and life or death. I get that babies have ups and downs as they grow and do react wildly to certain stimuli but moms usually know the stim and if it’s out of the normal pattern or what is felt during a higher introduced stimuli like loud sound, sudden temp change, extreme change in food ingredients like high sugar or low sugar or whatever. Those will make babies go wild but I think that kind of wild becomes familiar to mom and the baby going wild bc of a life or death issue maybe could feel the same but my gut says it can be perceived as different. If it feels the same way, why not take each feeling of excessive out of pattern movement seriously and check it out. What is that going to hurt to do it vs what will it hurt to ignore it. To the medical system, get your priorities straight. More checks might be all for nothing but if one quarter of pregnancies end up in demise there is a lot yet to learn. Especially in otherwise healthy pregnancies and seemingly healthy at the checks fetus checks. This is a situation where we need more research and information out to moms with healthy pregnancies that if you feel extremely high movement, get checked and persevere to whomever will do the check even if they are making fun and laughing. It’s sick to laugh at a mom’s concern anyways but to minimize it is obviously potentially fatal to baby and a huge life changing mental health issue for the mom and baby’s possible other involved person who helps all during the pregnancy, appts, labor and delivery. It’s causing PTSD which is often a life sentence of trauma and dysfunction both psychological but also physical via perpetuated elevated cortisol, lack of sleep, nightmares disrupting sleep, lack of ability to concentrate putting people at risk for accidents and job ability impact and so much more. All bc women are belittled for being concerned if their baby’s movement feels different! This makes me so angry! I’ve been in a medical situation where my spine pain was minimized over and over and told I am just over reacting and it’s just musculoskeletal pain. It was a disk herniated so badly it was halfway through my spinal nerves causing my function to diminish over time. I was told over and over to take ibuprofen and rest. Finally someone took me seriously and did an MRI and found “the worst herniated disk” my neurosurgeon had ever seen. This bc they made assumptions about me that 1. I have anxiety disorder so maybe I was exaggerating and 2. I was overweight and so they thought I just pulled a muscle being overweight. The fact is that each body is different and each situation is individual slips minds in busy medical settings. It’s important to be the squeaky wheel if you feel something is wrong and make them do proper exams. I don’t know what that proper exam would be in the case of a high fetal movement that would point to distress. Can they measure the baby’s oxygenation in utero? I’m sure they can as they do surgeries on fetuses. Ugh. I’m so sorry you and your husband and baby Kaia were made poster children for medical negligence of education and research.
I was 35weeks w mia she had increased movement almost like get me out of here . she died next 12. Hrs from they say her heart went to fast. I never thaught abt tht eaither wow
I am so sorry for your loss❤️ I had no idea about this and wish I had seen your video over a month ago when I still had my baby girl at 38 weeks. The morning before she died, she had moved a lot, and I felt like it was more than usual, or at least the strength from her kicks were increased but I thought that it was a good thing. I had no idea it would be what it became. I wasn’t even warned about a change in movement, as long as I had 6 movements within two hours, I was told I was fine. I really appreciate your videos, and I feel the same way-my faith is shaken and I am angry about it and I can’t even pray because I just feel like my husband and I were failed by the universe or some higher power. Thank you for sharing your journey ❤️🩹
I’m so sorry for your loss 😢.. I lost my daughter at 39 weeks.. no cause was found… now that I remember the night before she passed away she was moving a lot but I didn’t know that it could be a sign neither😢😢😢😢
Any change in your babies "normal" is worth getting checked. My sister had that happen to her during her pregnancy with her daughter. One morning she felt less movement. She called her doctor. He had her come in for an NST test. She was what is called non reactive. No increase or decrease in heartrate. From there she had a bio physical. My sister said seeing her baby so still scared her. If she had not seen her heart beating she said she would have believed her baby was dead. She was completely still. The nurse initially just checked baby's heart rate and said it was good and wanted to send her home. The nurse told the doctor and he said no, when a mother comes in due to movement change you do a complete work up. My niece was delivered via c-section as soon as a NICU helicopter team was there to take her to the hospital over an hour away that had a NICU to take care of her until she was ready to go home. Pay attention to your baby's movement. Demand further tests if you notice things are different. Go to a different hospital if you don't get all the tests.
Thank you for sharing all of this. This terrible event will not be in vain. Even you telling the world of your experience could save babies in the future. I cried when I saw the pain in your eyes. I’m 7.5 pregnant and I fear a lot what could happen. Of course it’s beneficial for us to be in the know as best we can. I just pray you would try one thing. And it might seem crazy or make you mad at me. But all I can share is that when I’m at my worst or lowest place I used to crawl up and hide in darkness and I became very suicidal. But now I get on my knees and pray to the Lord Jesus Christ. He has showed up for too many times to count and after surrendering to His Lordship He changed me overnight now I’m a completely different Kelly. But I have love for others and peace in my life today all because His presence and His security is with me. And He answered all my questions. So I know He can do the same thing for you. Prayers going out to you and your beautiful family.
This is so sad. I was monitored through high risk and was only ever warned about decreased movement, and it was repeated twice a week...never once about increase. I lost my son to undiagnosed PDA prior to this pregnancy (which is fixed with meds or minor surgery), and I knew something was wrong with him before he went into congestive heart failure, I was ignored from medical staff resulting in malpractice resulting in death.
@@samanthamarzal6141 patent ductus arteriosus. Babies patent stays wide open while in utero, and closes within 48 following birth. My son's stayed wide open and he went into congestive heart failure because of it.
My friend have lost her child this way too. She knew something is wrong, and wanted to stay in the hospital. But they have sent her home. Next day her perfect daugter was born dead. A few years later my friend met a stranger woman with daughter (at the same age her daughter would be) they had a conversation about her birthday. It showed up, that she was born day after her stillborn daughter in the same hospital. And without knowing, what happened to my friend, she told her, that one day before her, there was a woman who delivered dead baby and this was the thing that saved her baby, because the hospital staff were affraid to send home another women.
I am so sorry for your loss, i cant even manage or even begin to understand how you both feel. You could do so much to educate women on this and if anyone can do this it would be you. Your beautiful little angel will be your focus, and you could prevent or decrease other parents going through the grief you both have. Im thinking and praying for you both ❤
@@StefanieandKameron you will do an amazing job and help so many women gain the knowledge on how to spot other signs and push there care provider to check there baby out. You will make a difference in little kaia's name ( sorry if i spelt her name wrong ). I wish you the best of luck getting this off the ground ❤❤
Why their not taking this seriously basing it on their opinion that nah everything is fine sometimes im thinking we need to be panicking in order for them to pay attention to you. It's better to panic when you feel there's something wrong cause 95 % of the time mothers knows more than a proffessional doctors. they should listen to the cries of the mothers crying out that yes there's something wrong
My nephew is alive because the hospital listened to my sisters concerns!!! We lived together the whole time my sister was pregnant. At 29 weeks my sister woke me up at 1am saying the baby was doing a jerking motion. I asked if it was hiccups and she said absolutely not! The hospital was 2 minutes away so we went in, They monitored baby for maybe 10 minutes & my sister kept pushing on him to get him to move. They immediately decided it was safer to deliver him right then. He had the cord wrapped around his neck & left arm, when he came out he was limp. Pale & blue, he was resuscitated after 6 minutes of CPR. He was 2lbs 1oz & was in NICU for 3 months. His lungs weren't fully developed & he crashed a few times early on. He's now 32 years old. He does have some lasting issues. His lungs are smaller than the average adult, his voice is really scratchy cuz is vocal cords have scar tissue from being intubated & he's quite small as well. But because my sister was aware & the Dr's listened he is alive, Well & has his own family. As women we learn our babies habits & movements, if we don't feel ok about something. Dr's should listen and put our minds at ease even if everything is fine.
Thank you for shedding some light on this because i did not know about this and you are absolutely right, the lack of education and i believe the medical system just likes to brush things off. I believe every woman should be considered high risk if she is pregnant even for the first time because they can be monitored. Damn I see you I feel you and I am sending you so much love. I am actually sitting here thinking back now was I a victim to this, I have been wanting to share my story for so long but i break down just from the though....Dont feel like you are not bringing awareness, I show gratitude for your time and energy to even share.
I'm glad your bringing it up and talking about it to make other new mums aware to not only look out for decrease movements doctors need to start taking it more seriously so sorry for the loss of your beautiful angel 😔❤️❤️
My mothers 2nd baby was born alive but passed 22 hours. He was about a month early, and his lungs were not developed enough, even tho my Grandmother volunteered to stay with him the hospital refused saying he would have a nurse by his side., she was not and his lungs filled with fluid, no nurse by his side to revive him. His weight was 5.8oz. I was born next, my weight 5.3. I had my issues but I am 74. My mother small, when her babies got to be about 5 pounds she would go into labor My mother mourned, her friend in HS died having her first. When I had my kids, I worried, but it took me 2 hr to have John, an hour and half to have Becky, they are 52 and 50.
Sweetheart my heart goes out to you and your husband! 💔 There’s absolutely nothing you did or could have done to change anything. God has a plan and He will use this tragedy for good. Trust His will for your life. I pray that in your brokenness, it draws you close to God. I pray in the mighty name of Jesus that He brings you peace, comfort and that He manifests and you feel His great love for you. Your baby girl is an angel 👼 in heaven looking down on you! We don’t understand His ways but just like the heavens are higher than the earth, so are His ways and thoughts higher than ours. God is near to the broken hearted. I am so sorry for your loss.
The US has the worse health care system also known as sick care. This is not the country to be in if you need medical care. Luckily my kids were born in another country where they pamper pregnant women. I've had miscarriages, but stillbirths are tougher. I hope you are thriving as I'm writing this 2yrs later. Blessings ❤
I really feel for you and I am glad you are going to a support group. Unfortunately in this day and age an increase or decrease in fetal kicks would not have brought about a positive outcome for your baby. Unless it was caught within a few kicks the baby would be born with severe problems. We just don’t have the technology yet for parents to be able to see into the womb and know when something is wrong. Hopefully, within the next 20 years that will be available.Please take care and surround yourself with supportive family and friends. I will be watching, I want to be able to see you smile and I can wait until that happens. You just grieve all you want and know that I will be praying for you. You have affected me for some reason, maybe it’s because I’m a redhead like you, but MUCH older.
My son was stillborn at 24 weeks, and at my 20 week appointment they ad a hard time finding his heartbeat but did find it. That same day I had the worst pain I had felt the entire pregnancy but they said it was just “round ligament pain” no matter how many times I told them it was way more than that pain could be. I won’t ever forget that appointment. And the doctor that day was one of the ones in rotation during my labor.
Oh honey, this is the worst feeling in the world. Put that anger into action when you feel ready. You are absolutely right, women's health care is abysmal in so many ways. Reproductive care is broken across the board, and western medicine has so far to go in really truly deeply listening to women. It is a reality that women are often called hypochondriacs, or hysterical by doctors when in reality they are listening to their instincts and body wisdom. You will always advocate for yourself and your future children. We must all keep fighting to change a system that has never made women a priority, in research, funding, reproductive rights, you name it. I hope future generations of women will never have to suffer the ignorance and lack of empathy that the generations before have suffered. My heart goes out to you, what a terrible feeling to live with. Getting angry and speaking out is a powerful way to go forward.
My moms friend had the same the night before bed the baby in the belly went nuts and then all of a sudden went all quiet. They went totally the hospital and the baby died due to the cord around its neck suffocating it. She was 38 weeks.
First of all, I am so very sorry for your loss and very happy to see that your rainbow baby boy is on the way! One thing I want to recommend, though, if anyone ends up in this situation, is that being demanding or overly assertive, especially in a panicked or emotional state, generally doesn't end with getting the proper care. Its wrong, but an ugly truth. My recommendation would be to just say what you need to in order to get your baby what they need. In late pregnancy decreased movement will get you a non stress test, so if there are any changes in baby's behavior that worry any of you ladies, I'd simply tell them there are significantly decreased movements and ensure your baby gets the testing and care they may need as quickly as possible, rather than trying, possibly unsuccessfully, to change their minds about taking increased movements seriously, although they certainly should!
Does UA-cam allow you to edit titles? I think moms could find it more if you put something like “increased movement can mean an unborn baby is in trouble. “ I want this masterpiece, heartbreaking work to go viral for everyone. We love you Stefanie! 💛
I am sorry for your loss. I lost my 12 year old daughter and it doesn’t matter how long you had your child with you. You have lost your hope and dreams with that child. Nothing worse than a mother’s broken heart. I took my daughter to a pediatrician when she was a newborn. She wasn’t gaining weight. When I questioned why and asked more questions he dismissed me as being a new mom. That made me mad so I found a dr who I loved. He said mothers know their children more than he did so he always, listened to moms complaints and treated accordingly. He was the best dr ever. I don’t know what they are teaching in med school these days. You have to find just to get tests done. It almost the same when a fast food place didn’t make your food the way you asked....always have to fight for something these days. Always listen to your gut instincts.
You remind me of Donna from that 70s show. You're so pretty! I'm so sorry this happened to you. I stumbled upon you on UA-cam this morning from my recommended. And your videos are making me cry with you. 💔
Congratulations he is beautiful...these days fly by...I have 5 cats and 2 more that live outside...I have been buying my cat food from Amazon they have the best price for dry food..wet food Walmart.
I know I’m 2 years too late but I don’t think you should blame yourself like you said it’s up to the doctor if they will admit you for that reason or not I think doctors should take pregnant women more seriously After all they know they know their body better then anything else
I don't know if this will mean anything to you, but....my granddaughters story. She was high risk...elevated bp, sugar. Also had already lost two pregnancies earlier same year. Sooo yes, high risk. This was in Oregon, Washington. (Because later I researched...yes USA does have poor record in fetal/maternal mortality.) Anyway, I believe she should have been admitted and monitored at least days before. Long/short...she hemmoraged Christmas Day...baby died three days later. Not sure if she'd want me sharing, but damn these stories need to be told! Cause women probably go home saying either...couldn't have been prevented, or ..it was my fault...neither of which is true! BTW, so so sorry 😔😐❣️
So my baby Casey was stillborn in 1997 at 36 weeks and it was 2 days before my birthday when i finally delivered her. She had increased movement a few days before when I was at my appointment. The doctor asked if this was her normal and i told him no. But this was the other doctor in the group that I do not normally see and he was busy. So in and out of the room he went. Two days later im at work and i dont feel any kicks. But the strange this is when a baby dies, they still move in the fluid and you think they are still there. But when i got to the doctors office there was no heartbeat. Mind you this was a high-risk office because I had multiple miscarriages previously and a previous stillborn at 26 weeks in 1985. They knew my risk. But this doctor didn't care. And the first thing they wanted to do was take my blood to see if i took any drugs. They were trying to blame it on me. A year later I lost twins in first trimester. Then 6 months later I conceived on my own. I also had blood test for any clotting and was negative all along but this time it was borderline. So I was sent to a rheumatologist. I was put on lovenox injections to keep my blood thin, along with the baby aspirin, and it took me through my pregnancy without any issues. The doctor induced me at 38 weeks just to be safe and have a live baby. And I did. It was my last baby. I was finally happy. And dont believe people who tell you to stop trying. My motto was , "if i dont try, then I wont get." And i was right. I had the will and the means and my daughter is 23 years old now and i treasure her everyday.
I had bleeding at 34 weeks. Went to the hospital & they said everything was fine but I insisted on getting another ultrasound even though they were annoyed. As I was waiting afterwards, to speak with my OBG, and it was taking a while, I heard the nurse put my chart on the door outside. I opened the door & grabbed the chart. My baby’s cord was around his neck and the fluid was low. The doctor comes in & says everything is fine ?! I said is he big enough to be delivered? I insisted on a c section the next morning. I had to sign a bunch of waivers- Long story short-he was small but perfect..turns out, after the c section, my whole body shut down. I had undiagnosed Crohn’s disease and a huge abscess in my intestines. It’s crazy to me that even female doctors treat women like we’re idiots . I know for a fact, that if I had not insisted on a c section, my son would not be alive today. This was many years ago, but it still makes me emotional thinking about it. I am so sorry for your loss.
Aw mama :(. My most recent son came out not breathing. They were able to save him but this really resonates with me because a few weeks before I had a day where he was moving like CRAZY and then the next day he was barely moving at all. I kept finding his heartbeat with the Doppler being extremely low like LOWER than mine and then a little later it would go back up. I went to the hospital and they did an ultrasound and nst and said his non stress test was okay..that they wished he had more spikes but it was still acceptable and sent me home. I knew something wasn't right and asked if the cord could be around his neck and they looked at the ultrasound and said they couldn't tell but he has plenty of room and sent me home. When I went into labor his heart rate dropped with my contractions as I was pushing and it completely stopped. He came out not breathing. Thankfully they brought him back but the cord had been double wrapped around his neck. I think you are onto something with the increase movement then decreased movement thing. That's exactly what happened. So whether he went crazy and got tangled I'm not sure but that's exactly what happened. Makes me so nervous for this pregnancy. Sending love and prayers for your current pregnancy mama. ❤️
i knew it. i knew it. i knew they were panicked and knew they were suffocating, trying to get out, desperately and then gone!! no one wanted to listen. this has to stop!! listen to us! im so ANGRY too.
I know increased movement is a sign of fetal distress as I saw it in my cat that died giving birth. When she died the kittens that had not been born went crazy in her belly for about a minute and then went still. I do not see how doctors are missing this as a sign.
I went to Labor & Delivery after experiencing a gush of blood at full term. It was due to placental abruption but the staff was negligent and did not believe me! They put me into a spare room and sedated me as the bleeding had mysteriously stopped. The following morning I awoke to the bed full of blood and the staff said "We don't like the way this baby is moving". Very rapid panicked movement. Death throes they call them. Finally I was believed. After that all systems go for an emergency c-section. My baby was born dying! He needed to be resuscitated and they were afraid about the amount of oxygen he'd lost plus he had wet lung. I came so close to losing him that day and the days that followed. Had the staff listened to me on admittance, this wouldn't have happened. He had seizures but fortunately grew out of them. I was this close to suing them.
Stefanie & Kameron I am soo sorry for your beautiful daughter Kaia born asleep. I want to thank you for getting me out of a funk. My baby boy was born asleep August 17, 2021 I was 30 weeks. I agree with everything you said in this video. Thank you again 😢
I also wanted to say that moms have an instinct and I think the medical profession should listen more to this. I was almost panicky when the baby was moving more at my appointment but i trusted the doctor. And then a few days later my baby died. They dont know everything.
When I was pregnant with my first baby my friend was pregnant also. She was further along than I, she lost her baby at 36 weeks from a cord accident. We had the same ob/gyn and she had went in 24 hours before her baby passed. She knew something was wrong. They did nothing to check her baby. Nothing. I immediately became completely overwhelmed with anxiety for my own pregnancy. I went to the doctor for EVERY. SINGLE. THING. I even received negative comments from doctors and staff. I didn't care. If you ever feel like something is wrong, insist on being checked out!!!
I went to the doctor for every single too. They called me a frequent flyer and one ob called me a hypochondriac. We are growing humans in our bodies and we are their voice and for medical staff to minimise or imply we are overreacting is wrong. My mom always told me to trust my motherly instincts and I do.
I have a friend that lost a baby but at 8 months due to a genetic issue but as a result I started reading many stories in groups from women that talked about what you described. Sudden intense increased movement that was totally abnormal. I don't know why it isn't recognized in the medical community. Do women not relate this to their doctor after their child is born still? Do they not add 2+2 and think well just maybe this could be distress in the baby that needs to be checked our? I don't know but it for sure isn't unusual but is usual enough in stillbirths that it should be a sign something is wrong. Since your experience came and then things went back to normal until you labored and had Kaia who was born still how did that relate to her death? I don't have the answers but I don't know that you could have done anything differently that would have made a difference. Even if you had gone to the hospital immediately and she was delivered by section when you got there would she have been alive? I don't know. No one knows what the increased insane movement means. Distress yes of course but why, what did it mean was happening to the baby in the womb? What did it mean? I really want to know and what should be done about it when it happens so that perhaps if you hurry fast enough the baby could be delivered right away and saved. What happened to Kaia in there, something happened to her, she was in trouble but what was it? This needs to be studied and there needs to be a protocol for this kind of event so that women can go to the hospital when it happens and the babies can be delivered asap. I am so sorry
I’m so sorry you are going through this. I am 35 weeks along and just want to say thank you for posting this and educating people. You can save so many lives just by educating people on this.
Lost my baby 1 year ago stillbirth and I noticed an increase in movement the night before he die. But like you said we are not taken into consideration if we go to L&D we get turned away. And doctors always assure you that increase movement is good.
I sincerely hope things change. It will be patient driven however. A friend of mine changed something in the health system by writing letters and telling their story over and over.
I've been able to find studies that say increase in fetal movements can be a sign of fetal distress. It's sad it's not widespread information. I don't get why doctors aren't warning their patients. This is the first I'm hearing of it too. It's upsetting.
My sweet girl I am so sorry for your loss but please do not go down the route of blaming yourself there was nothing you could do and even if you had gone in the medicine isn’t it there to let the doctors know what they could possibly do where would they possibly start please don’t torture yourself
My Obgyn was one of the most famous here in this city and every week I told her that my baby was breech until I had an emergency c section . I believe you, I feel you, I am sooo sorry, I have no words for your loss
I was in my 9th month, doing laundry when my baby started moving around in what seemed frantic to me. It was also a time of day he wasn't usually very active. I just knew he was in distress so immediately went to the hospital where they put a monitor on me and suddenly my Obgyn was in the room saying I needed a C-section. My son was born but needed respiratory treatment but he was fine, however turns out his umbilical cord was not only around his neck but had a knot in it! I was certain this was the reason for his increased frantic movements, so yes, increased activity can be a serious sign baby is in distress. It's impossible to know anything for certain. I was never made aware that increased activity could be a problem. I was just lucky. You are NOT to blame. It is not your fault sweet mamma and you have saved lives by posting your experience.
I just found ur videos & I am going back to watch them. Im so sorry for ur loss. My mother whose middle name is Kaja lost a set of twin girls & the drs didn’t do anything to prevent it when the first one went into distress during labor. She ended up delivering both of them stillborn & there was no attempt to intervene & do an emergency c-section or anything else to save them. My mother said it was devastating & u never get over it u just learn to live w the loss. So sad.
As a future L&D nurse, I promise I will watch out for this, and will go against every person in that hospital to get momma and checked out, possibly saving babies, and families from heartbreak like so you and many others had/have to go through. I'm so sorry for your loss, momma. 💔
Thank you Rhonda ♥
I was able to talk with the nursing students in my class at school about how to treat a mom who had a stillborn because i still feel that they try and stay away from the moms who lose babies just because they dont know what to say. So I tried to add comfort to the situation. Cause all I got was a butterfly on my closed door afterwards. It was very lonely. @@RedRoseSeptember22
Thank you. I have never had a stillbirth, but my grandmother and my sister did. You can make a difference by listening to these women, just like Stefani is by making women aware of this, because she's right. They don't tell you this at your prenatal appointments. Thank you.
I am in med school, interested in specializing in gynecology. Thank you for sharing your story. I will try to be as informed as possible so I will never unknowingly cause such a tragedy.
I’m in the uk & I’m SO thankful that my midwife made it very clear to me that any change in movement including increased needs to be checked out asap.
At 38 weeks I had one episode of decreased movement so I went in to be monitored and all was ok but the following week (39 weeks) I had an episode of increased movement so I went back in and turns out my placenta was basically failing and they had to induce me straight away. My little girl was in massive distress ( extremely low heart rate) and came out not breathing. Long story short the amazing team got her breathing and she was healthy, but honestly if I didn’t know thanks to my midwife that an increase in movement is just as serious as a decrease, I’m not sure I would have my 4 year old daughter next to me right now
I’m in Scotland and I’m the same. I’m constantly told and see posters all over the hospital saying “any change in movement needs to be checked” and “your movements shouldn’t change even as your baby gets bigger”, I hear a lot of people saying “my baby must be running out of room” which just isn’t true!!
@@baxterbunch Here in Japan, same. If I have any doubts I can come to the hospital and they do ultrasound and NTS immediately.
Oh gosh! I'm so glad they were able to save her in time ♥
I'm pregnant and I had no idea about this. Thank you so much for this video
I’m 17 weeks pregnant and very thankful I just found this video. I knew a decrease was bad but I didn’t know anything about an increase.
Stefani, because of you, Kaia is saving the lives of so many babies! Her life still, and will always have, meaning. She was perfect and beautiful. I know that she is so proud of you and Kameron!
My best friend lost her daughter at 7 months gestation. I asked her about increased movement before she lost Abby. She said yes, she felt it, too. I told her about your channel, and she believes, as I do, that you're doing a wonderful thing by telling women about this. What a wonderful way to honor Kaia!
Our daughter was stillborn at 41 weeks. The day before I realised something was wrong she went crazy in my tummy, I thought I’d drunk to much fizzy drink which made her move an insane amount, more than normal, but I realised when we were told she had no heartbeat that she had been very, very distressed that night. Her cord was wrapped round her neck and consequently she was stillborn. I remember those distressed movements to this day, the guilt that somehow I should have known. Stay strong but grieve for your daughter. You have highlighted the importance of increased movement of babies. I’ve never heard anyone speak about this before, thank you xx Grace Louise 30/10/1993
I'm so so so sorry this happened to you, too. 💔
*Never* have I ever heard more activity being a negative thing. I am hoping by sharing, more mamas will know to look out for an increase in movement.
So sorry you are part of this horrible club, mama. 😭
Yes my daughter's teacher just lost her precious son and they do say increase movement is a warning sign, at least when I was pregnant with my rainbow daughter I was told that, I would get so scared Everytime she was very active, it terrified me
@@StefanieandKameron stop posting pictures of your dead baby on UA-cam
@@catherinerothe4374 stop being an insensitive asshat and click a different video, then.
@@catherinerothe4374 what is wrong with you? I guarantee you wouldn't walk up to a grieving mother showing pictures of her sleeping baby and say some shit like that so don't come up on this grieving mother's platform and say it hiding behind a screen! People like you make me sick.
I’m so sorry, Hun. I lost my son when he was 22 years old. I also feel like he was failed by the health care system. Also by insurance, the government, society, family, and even us, as parents. Totally different circumstances. I just wanted to leave you a message so you know you’re not alone. Grieving mothers are a special type of misery. Much love and healing 💜
I just stumbled on to your site, after experiencing a miscarriage, just looking for support. First off, my heart goes out to you, and your family for experiencing such a deep profound loss. There are no words, and I pray for you, for strength and healing. Secondly, I cannot agree with you more that there is not enough education and research devoted to STOPPING THIS FROM HAPPENING! Yes, some things cannot be explained, but this is such a ripe learning opportunity for the medical field. And I commend you, for taking matters in to your own hands to educate yourself and others, and to TRULY ADVOCATE for this extraordinary cause. Together, hopefully, one day we will figure out this mystery, so that no one will ever have to go through this kind of loss again 💘
I can’t remember where I read or heard about a sudden increase in movement being a potential sign of distress, but I know I did. Later in my pregnancy, I changed from an OB to midwife because my care was so terrible and she would brush off any concern I had. My new midwife also cautioned me about increased movement as well. I kept it in the back of my mind during my pregnancy. Thank you for putting this video out there, parents need to know!
I’m so sorry about your sweet daughter. 🤍
I agree that midwifery care exceeds OB care. I had midwives with my first but ended up going into preterm labor and had to give birth at hospital with an OB. With my second I was considered high risk so I had an OB straight away. After switching doctors 3 times because I wasn’t receiving high quality care I ended up saying fuck it and getting a midwife even though there was a higher chance of me having a baby preterm again. I ended up making it to 39 weeks and had my baby at home with the most amazing midwife. I literally could call her anytime. We are so close now and she always gave me the utmost care.
My son was stillborn almost a month ago. I was 36 weeks pregnant at the time. :'( I"m also struggling with the thoughts of 'maybe I could have saved him'. Since in the last couple of weeks, I had noticed a decrease in movements.... my boy was always so so active, and even with the decrease in movements, he would still easily pass a kick counter. I just felt a bit weird/uncomfortable (which everyone says they feel at the end of pregnancy). We were both completely healthy and the entire pregnancy had been smooth.
I don't blame the doctors for what happened, but at the time they assured me that our Rowan was fine, they said he was just getting too big to move about as much as he did previously. My friends and family with multiple kids said the same thing. It's possible that he was fine up until the last night I went to bed... it's also possible that something really was wrong a couple of weeks before. Either way, you expect a virtually full-term baby to be fine unless you notice bleeding or something. Super hard for people in our position to accept that it's really not out fault... just a horrific thing that happened. :(
I'm still trying to work out how to live without him... so sorry you and other people are going through the same thing.
I’m a midwife in Sweden. In midwifery-school we talked about this quite a bit during a lecture about stillbirth. Any change in the patterns and amounts of movements should be taken seriously. I believe the research on this is quite new, and unfortunately not all medical education is the same. I’m really sorry for your loss, thank you for spreading awareness on this.
I was reading that USA has one of the highest stillbirth and infant mortality rates in the developed world. 😔
I hope we can catch up, because when I asked my doctor about her increase in movement he said,"there is no evidence that it's related to distress." 😑
@@StefanieandKameron I'm so sorry 😔
I got pregnant while working in Sweden on a short term contract. I visited a midwife clinic for check ups and was very impressed how well educated my midwife was, much better than the midwife I got in Germany upon my return. You’ve got an excellent system.
I currently live in the UK and lived in Switzerland before, in both countries my midwives insisted that any significant change in movement patterns deserved being assessed. Mums know their babies and should be listened to at all times. I'm sorry Stephanie for your loss.
I was high-risk, had diabetes, had placenta previa, 35+ years old and I am in Sweden. All my routine appointments went fine joking about how my baby is underweight MAY BE because I am short, untill one morning at 37+5 week my baby stopped moving...... I can't explain what I am going through even after 13 months.... I do sometime want to shout to the healthcare system and say, I don't want your sympati after something goes wrong. I don't want you to say oh, I am sorry but, you are still young. Why don't you try not to put a woman to go through this trauma that would haunt her for rest of her life in the first place?
Currently pregnant and I am sending you all of my love. I can’t imagine how this would impact your life. Thank you for sharing this video as I’ve never been told anything about increased movement. I’m sure this was hard to share, so thank you so much
It was four years this past May since my daughter was stillborn at 38 weeks. The day before there was reduced movement, then that evening when going to bed, an insane amount of abnormal movement. I woke up in the middle of the night, and I knew she was gone. I still struggle so much with guilt and the what if’s. Even though it’s been four years, your grief resonates with me, and I can relate so much. I am so sorry for your loss. I see you. Hugs and prayers.
I should also mention I have had two babies since and was definitely labeled “high risk.” The daughter I lost was my fifth baby, so I had four healthy babies prior and two afterwards.
it makes me sick thinking they are aware of them dying and they panic inside us 😢 il never be ok about it
I am so so sorry this happened to you your partner and baby girl. I am a Midwife in Australia and this is one of the things we tell our women to look out for. You are right. There isn’t enough information out there for women and health professionals. You are amazing to put this video out for others. I hope that you can find some small comfort in knowing you will save babies by this selfless gift. ❤️
Sounds to me like the US needs to get their shit together. This is simple education that could save our childrens lives. Stefanie I completely understand your anger and frustration🤬
I'm in nsw Australia and no mid wife ever mentioned this to me it was always decreased movement that was mentioned.
Your mom is with you. She sent a sign with the lamp. Shes letting you know shes there with you. May God continue to bless your little family.
Please be the change every single woman so desperately needs! Don't ever stop educating, learning and sharing your story! It's important! You matter and your baby girl mattered! I pray you find the peace and inner strength you need to let this be your new calling! ❤
She should join up with felly still braxton's mama. She went through this too. It’s unacceptable that OB’s don’t take more time to educate us on this!
Condolences to you and yours on this tragic loss. And yes, you are so right. Why would the doctor/hospital, etc. not check out an increase in movement shortly before birth? Especially since baby movements usually decrease at this time? This was exactly my experience (3 children), to the point that I would be concerned due to lack of movement, at least with one of them. Why not do an ultrasound as a matter of course shortly before birth to see that everything looks good? For example, if the cord is well placed and the placenta still in good shape? I recall how the doctor and the nurses commented on my son's cord length - it was so long. He could have wrapped it around himself at least three times. I recall also when it was a "must" to place babies on their tummy for sleeping, and everyone did this. Now you place them on their back, because the US had so many infant crib deaths, and it was determined that the babies just did not get enough air in this position. Medicine is not infallible. Always trust your instinct. God's blessings to you.
You are raising awareness with your videos. You will save other babies by educating others. That is Kaia’s legacy. 💕
♥
I blame lack of education and research and most of all I blame how much insurance companies play a role in the type and amount of care patients receive. Love your channel sweetie, you are doing amazing.
I was just discussing this with my friend who is an RN! Insurance was such a battle for me to even get an anatomy scan. I can't imagine the hoops they make people go through for NST or BPP. 😔
My baby could still be here if BPP/NST was a given for all pregnancies.
I totally agree..and the doctors go along with it I had a really good obg that didn't follow the that they still have me regular ultrasound and check ups it saved my twins
Some doctors understand the whole insurance thing and will still do more ultrasounds or appointments they should really fight this
Wow. I have never heard of this before and now I’m pissed , it’s always decreased movement that they say to get checked out. Thank you for sharing this with us , as hard as it is, you are making a difference . I believe Kaia will save lives with this , she needed her Mommy to share with others. I am 5 weeks pp and currently on an app for pregnancy . I will share with others what you have mentioned , just to bring more awareness to them and tell anyone to get it checked out if they experience this. Sending you hugs and love .
Not sure how I ended up here but your story really hit home for me. My mother, at the age of 16, carried a baby full term. A couple of days before her birth she felt like she peed a lot. So she went to her doctor who dismissed her and told her nothing was wrong and she shouldnt worry so much. Turned out she had a little hole in the placenta and my sister 'dried' up and died. My mom had told the doctor that movement was less and yet again she was send home. but the biggest problem about this all { was back in the 70's} was that my mother after giving birth was not allowed to hold her. She was taken away but in a box and my mom was told that she was still young and would have kids later on, so she didnt need to worry about her. How the F can you say that to anyone?? Different times they say now. I noticed when my mom got older that it started to burden on her. She was seeing people like you two, who had the oppurtunity to say goodbye, to hold your baby, to make pictures and so so much more. I told my mom 'Mom you are not the only one, there must have been more women of your age that have gone through the same as you' So we made a post on facebook. The reactions went through the roof!! so many women have had the same experience. Together with a lot of these women my mother has raised money and they asked an artist to make a sculpture for all the stillborn babys and mothers that where treated this way. It is my moms mission to have a sculpture on every gravesite here in the Netherlands. I am so glad that times have changed and as a mother of two I cannot imagine what you and my mom have had to go through but I thank you for making it an 'open topic'
My first child my daugher was overactive and she was completely healthy when she was born.my boys in 2nd and 3rx pregnancy they were very sleepy no movements and they are healthy too.all of the with the cord around their neck.you can never now when your baby is safe or not inside you.only from the heartbeat in the ultrasound. Don't blame your self.you did your best
I had increase in movement too and lost my son and also feel like I missed the sign to save my son! Thank you for sharing this. I feel your pain and agree something needs to be changed!! My baby was perfect and is not here either. It's so damn heartbreaking and we need to raise awareness 💔
they were panicking in there. they were suffering. I knew it and they told me I was wrong! mothers know!
I am so very sorry for the loss of your little girl. Almost twenty-one years ago, I lost my third child, a baby son, due to stillbirth. He was at just twenty-two weeks gestation, but my experience was similar. Patrick had been quite active since I first felt his movement. Yet, the night when he passed away, he kicked so strongly that he felt as if he were a full-term baby. This memory still grieves me, as afterward I understood that he must have been in his death throes at that time. He was delivered about a week later with his umbilical cord wrapped tightly and knotted around his neck. Though our baby Patrick was too tiny to have been saved, it still breaks my heart that I was unable to help him. The womb is supposed to be the safest place. Please know that though your baby’s loss will always be with you, it does become easier to bear with time. So glad to learn of your current pregnancy, and thank you for raising awareness of this symptom of increased fetal movement ❤️
Late to this video but newly pregnant and thankful that you’re spreading awareness. It’s better that we advocate for our baby’s than to worry we are being too “anxious”. So sorry for your loss but thank you again for trying to use your knowledge to help others
Hi beautiful mama! Listen, if it helps you (or anyone), I had two horrible pregnancies with severe hyperemesis and the first ending in preeclampsia. My daughter nearly died during delivery and I’m pretty sure I might have as well.
I had decreased movement with my daughter, my first, and fought with an OB nurse at 3 AM at 36 weeks, after being so sick, knowing in my gut she felt like dead weight and was not okay.
They were pissed that I called. They wouldn’t see me.
She lived.
At my next checkup, 40 weeks to the day, I was induced immediately for sky high BP.
I am healthy as a horse. Active, 5’8”, broad, fit. I don’t smoke, I eat well, did everything right, etc, there was NO reason I should not have had a perfect delivery. But we both came close to losing our lives.
My son had increased activity which decreased the last week before birth.
He was almost ten pounds with an umbilical cord as thick as my arm almost!
No issues. None. Even with the signs of distress. Yet, my daughter very well could have died.
This is the point: Sometimes, you just can’t know. It’s not you. I did everything right, everything. I was so fit and healthy with my first, but we both came so close to death.
Sometimes you can do everything right but that one thing no one can possibly explain, that two minutes no one can recapture, goes all wrong.
I was a couple pushes (or a couple minutes) away from losing my daughter. I simply got lucky. Period. It could have happened to me.
That haunts me every day and I am absolutely grateful.
Years later, I threw myself in front of a truck that was heading for my son when he was two. It didn’t hit him but it was seconds away. Seconds.
I was lucky. He was lucky. That’s it.
My point is, and I’m crying as I write, we don’t always have control. Terrible things happen to good people, and to you, or anyone else who has suffered such an unspeakable loss, I am so sorry. As a human and as a mother, I am so sorry.
And it was NOT your fault.
Sending love.
Stefani, you are making a difference. Kaia will save other babies because of you. She matters! You and Kameron matter! Kaia was absolutely beautiful and she should be here today. That's a fact.
In loving memory of
Kaia Olivia Moise
Phillip Reid Haynes
Abigail Wynona Torrence
And every baby who fell asleep in the arms of Jesus before they were born. We see you. And for the parents who have to live every day without you. We see you. We pray for you.
I’m 49 and have had 3 kiddos. My oldest is 21. Baby Becoming overactive was something my OB-GYN talked about back in 2000. I’m very concerned that they don’t stress this more now. Spread the word, sweet girl! My husband is a pediatrician and even he thinks the healthcare system sucks here. Fortunately, he’s one of the good guys and stick by his Hippocratic oath and NEVER turns a patient away, regardless of insurance.
I wonder how you determine baby is overactive? Because I've known pregnant women who mentioned the baby was kicking a lot and just assumed it was normal. How can you tell if it's too much?
In my country, we are told that increased movement can be a sign of distress. We also have a class in our ante natal classes about what happens in a stillbirth, even down to what the baby is likely to look like if it passed a long time before birth. That was a sad night.
I just want to send a hug and love to those parent who’s babies are resting in heaven!
The one thing I can add is thru my pregnancies I would get about a 6 month size and stop growing, I felt no movement prior to finding no heartbeat. My family had opted I not see my babies and Ive hated them for that all these years, I wanted to see what they looked like, I wanted to hold them, It was until today I heard your story that I came to peace with maybe not seeing them was the best. Thank you for sharing your story❤️
Dear Stefanie, I see you.
I am so sorry for your loss.
You are very brave to speak about everything.
I wish you all the best greetings from Austria 💜💜💜🐈
I am so glad to hear someone SPEAK out loud about our health care system failing people who are putting their trust in them to care for them or there loved ones and to not brush us off or not take us seriously! You can have a great doctor who is limited on how they can handle your care because of red tape and dollar signs!
4 days before my due date , at night my baby moved like a man woman. She did NOT move that way at all towards my last weeks of pregnancy so immediately just in my heart I knew I had to RUN to the hospital. I left everyone still asleep and drove myself immediately because I did not want anyone to make me wait any longer. I go and get checked in, and the nurse LAUGHS at me and says I’m over reacting, the DOCTOR tells me increase in movement is NEVER a concern. I call bullshit. My baby happened to be just fine, thank god. But the fact I was laughed at, told it was NORMAL, and could’ve been easily turned away if I hadn’t forced them to monitor the babies heart rate and my contractions. Please if you feel ANY CHANGE any uncomforting feeling, GO with your GUT!
Any doctor or medical staff laughing at or minimizing someone’s concern even if it is a gut feeling and even if it’s wrong is essentially failure. The mom is the most familiar with the fetal growth and movement patterns and if something happens radically unfamiliar I would be panicked and want a check on the fetal health also. I don’t know why this is scoffed at. Women being scared, panicked, even if it’s often means they have a concern for their growing and obviously very fragile small body and organs and tissues and systems that are newly formed and at risk of damage or malfunction. It’s not bad to be scared or cautious or nervous or want to check more often. I feel like the regular scheduled checks should be the minimum checks but checking more often as needed whether by doctor/nurse/radiologist or mom concerns. The fact that babies have high movement before demise makes sense and is like an alarm system. Moms being expected to downplay their gut feeling or connection to their baby and further being made fun of as if it’s just a cute mommy nerves thing is a throwback to men being the doctors. Women docs doing this is even worse bc we think women will be more in touch with us and our bodies. It’s terrible and to me criminal to laugh, to downplay or worse yet to send someone home with no checking. It’s negligent and life or death. I get that babies have ups and downs as they grow and do react wildly to certain stimuli but moms usually know the stim and if it’s out of the normal pattern or what is felt during a higher introduced stimuli like loud sound, sudden temp change, extreme change in food ingredients like high sugar or low sugar or whatever. Those will make babies go wild but I think that kind of wild becomes familiar to mom and the baby going wild bc of a life or death issue maybe could feel the same but my gut says it can be perceived as different. If it feels the same way, why not take each feeling of excessive out of pattern movement seriously and check it out. What is that going to hurt to do it vs what will it hurt to ignore it. To the medical system, get your priorities straight. More checks might be all for nothing but if one quarter of pregnancies end up in demise there is a lot yet to learn. Especially in otherwise healthy pregnancies and seemingly healthy at the checks fetus checks.
This is a situation where we need more research and information out to moms with healthy pregnancies that if you feel extremely high movement, get checked and persevere to whomever will do the check even if they are making fun and laughing. It’s sick to laugh at a mom’s concern anyways but to minimize it is obviously potentially fatal to baby and a huge life changing mental health issue for the mom and baby’s possible other involved person who helps all during the pregnancy, appts, labor and delivery. It’s causing PTSD which is often a life sentence of trauma and dysfunction both psychological but also physical via perpetuated elevated cortisol, lack of sleep, nightmares disrupting sleep, lack of ability to concentrate putting people at risk for accidents and job ability impact and so much more. All bc women are belittled for being concerned if their baby’s movement feels different!
This makes me so angry! I’ve been in a medical situation where my spine pain was minimized over and over and told I am just over reacting and it’s just musculoskeletal pain. It was a disk herniated so badly it was halfway through my spinal nerves causing my function to diminish over time. I was told over and over to take ibuprofen and rest. Finally someone took me seriously and did an MRI and found “the worst herniated disk” my neurosurgeon had ever seen. This bc they made assumptions about me that 1. I have anxiety disorder so maybe I was exaggerating and 2. I was overweight and so they thought I just pulled a muscle being overweight. The fact is that each body is different and each situation is individual slips minds in busy medical settings. It’s important to be the squeaky wheel if you feel something is wrong and make them do proper exams. I don’t know what that proper exam would be in the case of a high fetal movement that would point to distress. Can they measure the baby’s oxygenation in utero? I’m sure they can as they do surgeries on fetuses. Ugh. I’m so sorry you and your husband and baby Kaia were made poster children for medical negligence of education and research.
I was 35weeks w mia she had increased movement almost like get me out of here . she died next 12. Hrs from they say her heart went to fast. I never thaught abt tht eaither wow
I am so sorry for your loss❤️ I had no idea about this and wish I had seen your video over a month ago when I still had my baby girl at 38 weeks. The morning before she died, she had moved a lot, and I felt like it was more than usual, or at least the strength from her kicks were increased but I thought that it was a good thing. I had no idea it would be what it became. I wasn’t even warned about a change in movement, as long as I had 6 movements within two hours, I was told I was fine. I really appreciate your videos, and I feel the same way-my faith is shaken and I am angry about it and I can’t even pray because I just feel like my husband and I were failed by the universe or some higher power. Thank you for sharing your journey ❤️🩹
I’m so sorry for your loss 😢.. I lost my daughter at 39 weeks.. no cause was found… now that I remember the night before she passed away she was moving a lot but I didn’t know that it could be a sign neither😢😢😢😢
Any change in your babies "normal" is worth getting checked. My sister had that happen to her during her pregnancy with her daughter. One morning she felt less movement. She called her doctor. He had her come in for an NST test. She was what is called non reactive. No increase or decrease in heartrate. From there she had a bio physical. My sister said seeing her baby so still scared her. If she had not seen her heart beating she said she would have believed her baby was dead. She was completely still. The nurse initially just checked baby's heart rate and said it was good and wanted to send her home. The nurse told the doctor and he said no, when a mother comes in due to movement change you do a complete work up.
My niece was delivered via c-section as soon as a NICU helicopter team was there to take her to the hospital over an hour away that had a NICU to take care of her until she was ready to go home.
Pay attention to your baby's movement. Demand further tests if you notice things are different. Go to a different hospital if you don't get all the tests.
Thank you for sharing all of this. This terrible event will not be in vain. Even you telling the world of your experience could save babies in the future.
I cried when I saw the pain in your eyes. I’m 7.5 pregnant and I fear a lot what could happen. Of course it’s beneficial for us to be in the know as best we can.
I just pray you would try one thing. And it might seem crazy or make you mad at me. But all I can share is that when I’m at my worst or lowest place I used to crawl up and hide in darkness and I became very suicidal. But now I get on my knees and pray to the Lord Jesus Christ.
He has showed up for too many times to count and after surrendering to His Lordship He changed me overnight now I’m a completely different Kelly.
But I have love for others and peace in my life today all because His presence and His security is with me. And He answered all my questions. So I know He can do the same thing for you.
Prayers going out to you and your beautiful family.
This is so sad. I was monitored through high risk and was only ever warned about decreased movement, and it was repeated twice a week...never once about increase. I lost my son to undiagnosed PDA prior to this pregnancy (which is fixed with meds or minor surgery), and I knew something was wrong with him before he went into congestive heart failure, I was ignored from medical staff resulting in malpractice resulting in death.
Hi I am sorry to ask this but what is PDA?
@@samanthamarzal6141 patent ductus arteriosus. Babies patent stays wide open while in utero, and closes within 48 following birth. My son's stayed wide open and he went into congestive heart failure because of it.
My friend have lost her child this way too. She knew something is wrong, and wanted to stay in the hospital. But they have sent her home. Next day her perfect daugter was born dead.
A few years later my friend met a stranger woman with daughter (at the same age her daughter would be) they had a conversation about her birthday. It showed up, that she was born day after her stillborn daughter in the same hospital. And without knowing, what happened to my friend, she told her, that one day before her, there was a woman who delivered dead baby and this was the thing that saved her baby, because the hospital staff were affraid to send home another women.
I am so sorry for your loss, i cant even manage or even begin to understand how you both feel. You could do so much to educate women on this and if anyone can do this it would be you. Your beautiful little angel will be your focus, and you could prevent or decrease other parents going through the grief you both have. Im thinking and praying for you both ❤
I am hoping this video can help save other babies. 💗💗
@@StefanieandKameron you will do an amazing job and help so many women gain the knowledge on how to spot other signs and push there care provider to check there baby out. You will make a difference in little kaia's name ( sorry if i spelt her name wrong ). I wish you the best of luck getting this off the ground ❤❤
Why their not taking this seriously basing it on their opinion that nah everything is fine sometimes im thinking we need to be panicking in order for them to pay attention to you. It's better to panic when you feel there's something wrong cause 95 % of the time mothers knows more than a proffessional doctors. they should listen to the cries of the mothers crying out that yes there's something wrong
My nephew is alive because the hospital listened to my sisters concerns!!! We lived together the whole time my sister was pregnant. At 29 weeks my sister woke me up at 1am saying the baby was doing a jerking motion. I asked if it was hiccups and she said absolutely not!
The hospital was 2 minutes away so we went in, They monitored baby for maybe 10 minutes & my sister kept pushing on him to get him to move. They immediately decided it was safer to deliver him right then.
He had the cord wrapped around his neck & left arm, when he came out he was limp. Pale & blue, he was resuscitated after 6 minutes of CPR. He was 2lbs 1oz & was in NICU for 3 months. His lungs weren't fully developed & he crashed a few times early on. He's now 32 years old. He does have some lasting issues. His lungs are smaller than the average adult, his voice is really scratchy cuz is vocal cords have scar tissue from being intubated & he's quite small as well. But because my sister was aware & the Dr's listened he is alive, Well & has his own family. As women we learn our babies habits & movements, if we don't feel ok about something. Dr's should listen and put our minds at ease even if everything is fine.
Thank you for shedding some light on this because i did not know about this and you are absolutely right, the lack of education and i believe the medical system just likes to brush things off. I believe every woman should be considered high risk if she is pregnant even for the first time because they can be monitored. Damn I see you I feel you and I am sending you so much love. I am actually sitting here thinking back now was I a victim to this, I have been wanting to share my story for so long but i break down just from the though....Dont feel like you are not bringing awareness, I show gratitude for your time and energy to even share.
I'm glad your bringing it up and talking about it to make other new mums aware to not only look out for decrease movements doctors need to start taking it more seriously so sorry for the loss of your beautiful angel 😔❤️❤️
My mothers 2nd baby was born alive but passed 22 hours. He was about a month early, and his lungs were not developed enough, even tho my Grandmother volunteered to stay with him the hospital refused saying he would have a nurse by his side., she was not and his lungs filled with fluid, no nurse by his side to revive him. His weight was 5.8oz. I was born next, my weight 5.3. I had my issues but I am 74. My mother small, when her babies got to be about 5 pounds she would go into labor My mother mourned, her friend in HS died having her first. When I had my kids, I worried, but it took me 2 hr to have John, an hour and half to have Becky, they are 52 and 50.
Sweetheart my heart goes out to you and your husband! 💔 There’s absolutely nothing you did or could have done to change anything. God has a plan and He will use this tragedy for good. Trust His will for your life. I pray that in your brokenness, it draws you close to God. I pray in the mighty name of Jesus that He brings you peace, comfort and that He manifests and you feel His great love for you. Your baby girl is an angel 👼 in heaven looking down on you! We don’t understand His ways but just like the heavens are higher than the earth, so are His ways and thoughts higher than ours. God is near to the broken hearted. I am so sorry for your loss.
The US has the worse health care system also known as sick care. This is not the country to be in if you need medical care. Luckily my kids were born in another country where they pamper pregnant women. I've had miscarriages, but stillbirths are tougher. I hope you are thriving as I'm writing this 2yrs later. Blessings ❤
*Hugs tightly* I'm so SO sorry Stefanie :( but please know you are helping so many parents with your story. ♥
I really feel for you and I am glad you are going to a support group. Unfortunately in this day and age an increase or decrease in fetal kicks would not have brought about a positive outcome for your baby. Unless it was caught within a few kicks the baby would be born with severe problems. We just don’t have the technology yet for parents to be able to see into the womb and know when something is wrong. Hopefully, within the next 20 years that will be available.Please take care and surround yourself with supportive family and friends. I will be watching, I want to be able to see you smile and I can wait until that happens. You just grieve all you want and know that I will be praying for you. You have affected me for some reason, maybe it’s because I’m a redhead like you, but MUCH older.
My son was stillborn at 24 weeks, and at my 20 week appointment they ad a hard time finding his heartbeat but did find it. That same day I had the worst pain I had felt the entire pregnancy but they said it was just “round ligament pain” no matter how many times I told them it was way more than that pain could be. I won’t ever forget that appointment. And the doctor that day was one of the ones in rotation during my labor.
Oh honey, this is the worst feeling in the world. Put that anger into action when you feel ready. You are absolutely right, women's health care is abysmal in so many ways. Reproductive care is broken across the board, and western medicine has so far to go in really truly deeply listening to women. It is a reality that women are often called hypochondriacs, or hysterical by doctors when in reality they are listening to their instincts and body wisdom. You will always advocate for yourself and your future children. We must all keep fighting to change a system that has never made women a priority, in research, funding, reproductive rights, you name it. I hope future generations of women will never have to suffer the ignorance and lack of empathy that the generations before have suffered. My heart goes out to you, what a terrible feeling to live with. Getting angry and speaking out is a powerful way to go forward.
1000% agree with everything you said 💗
My moms friend had the same the night before bed the baby in the belly went nuts and then all of a sudden went all quiet. They went totally the hospital and the baby died due to the cord around its neck suffocating it. She was 38 weeks.
The night before my granddaughter was stillborn her mommy sent a video of her moving like crazy, I think about that now and it haunts me.
First of all, I am so very sorry for your loss and very happy to see that your rainbow baby boy is on the way! One thing I want to recommend, though, if anyone ends up in this situation, is that being demanding or overly assertive, especially in a panicked or emotional state, generally doesn't end with getting the proper care. Its wrong, but an ugly truth. My recommendation would be to just say what you need to in order to get your baby what they need. In late pregnancy decreased movement will get you a non stress test, so if there are any changes in baby's behavior that worry any of you ladies, I'd simply tell them there are significantly decreased movements and ensure your baby gets the testing and care they may need as quickly as possible, rather than trying, possibly unsuccessfully, to change their minds about taking increased movements seriously, although they certainly should!
My guess is insurance saving money not paying for ultrasounds.
Does UA-cam allow you to edit titles? I think moms could find it more if you put something like “increased movement can mean an unborn baby is in trouble. “ I want this masterpiece, heartbreaking work to go viral for everyone. We love you Stefanie! 💛
Sent you my love and prayers from the Netherlands ❤️❤️
I am sorry for your loss. I lost my 12 year old daughter and it doesn’t matter how long you had your child with you. You have lost your hope and dreams with that child. Nothing worse than a mother’s broken heart. I took my daughter to a pediatrician when she was a newborn. She wasn’t gaining weight. When I questioned why and asked more questions he dismissed me as being a new mom. That made me mad so I found a dr who I loved. He said mothers know their children more than he did so he always, listened to moms complaints and treated accordingly. He was the best dr ever. I don’t know what they are teaching in med school these days. You have to find just to get tests done. It almost the same when a fast food place didn’t make your food the way you asked....always have to fight for something these days. Always listen to your gut instincts.
Thank you for spreading awareness,God bless
You remind me of Donna from that 70s show. You're so pretty!
I'm so sorry this happened to you. I stumbled upon you on UA-cam this morning from my recommended. And your videos are making me cry with you. 💔
Very nice Sharing dear respected friend full support and Big Likes from Ahmed Ali Nizamani,,,.
Sending love and my condolences to all the families that have walked this journey, it’s beyond heartbreaking
Congratulations he is beautiful...these days fly by...I have 5 cats and 2 more that live outside...I have been buying my cat food from Amazon they have the best price for dry food..wet food Walmart.
I'm sorry Steph, just know I'm praying that God may bless you and comfort all of you.
I know I’m 2 years too late but I don’t think you should blame yourself like you said it’s up to the doctor if they will admit you for that reason or not
I think doctors should take pregnant women more seriously
After all they know they know their body better then anything else
I also had a stillbirth full term.You are right i said my baby boy active too much.they said its normal.but my baby passed away 39 + weeks ..
I don't know if this will mean anything to you, but....my granddaughters story. She was high risk...elevated bp, sugar. Also had already lost two pregnancies earlier same year. Sooo yes, high risk. This was in Oregon, Washington. (Because later I researched...yes USA does have poor record in fetal/maternal mortality.) Anyway, I believe she should have been admitted and monitored at least days before. Long/short...she hemmoraged Christmas Day...baby died three days later. Not sure if she'd want me sharing, but damn these stories need to be told! Cause women probably go home saying either...couldn't have been prevented, or ..it was my fault...neither of which is true! BTW, so so sorry 😔😐❣️
So my baby Casey was stillborn in 1997 at 36 weeks and it was 2 days before my birthday when i finally delivered her. She had increased movement a few days before when I was at my appointment. The doctor asked if this was her normal and i told him no. But this was the other doctor in the group that I do not normally see and he was busy. So in and out of the room he went. Two days later im at work and i dont feel any kicks. But the strange this is when a baby dies, they still move in the fluid and you think they are still there. But when i got to the doctors office there was no heartbeat. Mind you this was a high-risk office because I had multiple miscarriages previously and a previous stillborn at 26 weeks in 1985. They knew my risk. But this doctor didn't care. And the first thing they wanted to do was take my blood to see if i took any drugs. They were trying to blame it on me. A year later I lost twins in first trimester. Then 6 months later I conceived on my own. I also had blood test for any clotting and was negative all along but this time it was borderline. So I was sent to a rheumatologist. I was put on lovenox injections to keep my blood thin, along with the baby aspirin, and it took me through my pregnancy without any issues. The doctor induced me at 38 weeks just to be safe and have a live baby. And I did. It was my last baby. I was finally happy. And dont believe people who tell you to stop trying. My motto was , "if i dont try, then I wont get." And i was right. I had the will and the means and my daughter is 23 years old now and i treasure her everyday.
I am so sorry to hear about your loss. May God give you the strength to deal with this huge loss🙏
I had bleeding at 34 weeks. Went to the hospital & they said everything was fine but I insisted on getting another ultrasound even though they were annoyed. As I was waiting afterwards, to speak with my OBG, and it was taking a while, I heard the nurse put my chart on the door outside. I opened the door & grabbed the chart. My baby’s cord was around his neck and the fluid was low. The doctor comes in & says everything is fine ?! I said is he big enough to be delivered? I insisted on a c section the next morning. I had to sign a bunch of waivers-
Long story short-he was small but perfect..turns out, after the c section, my whole body shut down. I had undiagnosed Crohn’s disease and a huge abscess in my intestines.
It’s crazy to me that even female doctors treat women like we’re idiots . I know for a fact, that if I had not insisted on a c section, my son would not be alive today. This was many years ago, but it still makes me emotional thinking about it.
I am so sorry for your loss.
Aw mama :(. My most recent son came out not breathing. They were able to save him but this really resonates with me because a few weeks before I had a day where he was moving like CRAZY and then the next day he was barely moving at all. I kept finding his heartbeat with the Doppler being extremely low like LOWER than mine and then a little later it would go back up. I went to the hospital and they did an ultrasound and nst and said his non stress test was okay..that they wished he had more spikes but it was still acceptable and sent me home. I knew something wasn't right and asked if the cord could be around his neck and they looked at the ultrasound and said they couldn't tell but he has plenty of room and sent me home. When I went into labor his heart rate dropped with my contractions as I was pushing and it completely stopped. He came out not breathing. Thankfully they brought him back but the cord had been double wrapped around his neck. I think you are onto something with the increase movement then decreased movement thing. That's exactly what happened. So whether he went crazy and got tangled I'm not sure but that's exactly what happened. Makes me so nervous for this pregnancy. Sending love and prayers for your current pregnancy mama. ❤️
i knew it. i knew it. i knew they were panicked and knew they were suffocating, trying to get out, desperately and then gone!! no one wanted to listen. this has to stop!! listen to us! im so ANGRY too.
I know increased movement is a sign of fetal distress as I saw it in my cat that died giving birth. When she died the kittens that had not been born went crazy in her belly for about a minute and then went still. I do not see how doctors are missing this as a sign.
Mom’s go with your gut… demand answers!! Specially dr.’s who tend to Pooh Pooh any Q. From their patients.
I lost my girl at 35 weeks gestation. And yes. Increased movement before no movement.
I went to Labor & Delivery after experiencing a gush of blood at full term. It was due to placental abruption but the staff was negligent and did not believe me! They put me into a spare room and sedated me as the bleeding had mysteriously stopped. The following morning I awoke to the bed full of blood and the staff said "We don't like the way this baby is moving". Very rapid panicked movement. Death throes they call them. Finally I was believed. After that all systems go for an emergency c-section. My baby was born dying! He needed to be resuscitated and they were afraid about the amount of oxygen he'd lost plus he had wet lung. I came so close to losing him that day and the days that followed. Had the staff listened to me on admittance, this wouldn't have happened. He had seizures but fortunately grew out of them. I was this close to suing them.
Stefanie & Kameron I am soo sorry for your beautiful daughter Kaia born asleep. I want to thank you for getting me out of a funk. My baby boy was born asleep August 17, 2021 I was 30 weeks. I agree with everything you said in this video. Thank you again 😢
I'm so sorry about your sweet little boy. What is your angel's name? 💗
@@StefanieandKameron aww.. thank you. His name is Giovanni.
@@bree1017
💗 Giovanni 💗
I also wanted to say that moms have an instinct and I think the medical profession should listen more to this. I was almost panicky when the baby was moving more at my appointment but i trusted the doctor. And then a few days later my baby died. They dont know everything.
When I was pregnant with my first baby my friend was pregnant also. She was further along than I, she lost her baby at 36 weeks from a cord accident. We had the same ob/gyn and she had went in 24 hours before her baby passed. She knew something was wrong. They did nothing to check her baby. Nothing. I immediately became completely overwhelmed with anxiety for my own pregnancy. I went to the doctor for EVERY. SINGLE. THING. I even received negative comments from doctors and staff. I didn't care. If you ever feel like something is wrong, insist on being checked out!!!
I have no doubt I am going to be viewed as the paranoid pregnant lady.
I'm sorry for your friend's loss 😔
I agree. Your body will let you know. Will definitely let you know 😔
I lost my baby to a chord accident at 38 weeks. I was definitely the paranoid pregnant lady in the subsequent pregnancies.
I went to the doctor for every single too. They called me a frequent flyer and one ob called me a hypochondriac. We are growing humans in our bodies and we are their voice and for medical staff to minimise or imply we are overreacting is wrong. My mom always told me to trust my motherly instincts and I do.
I have a friend that lost a baby but at 8 months due to a genetic issue but as a result I started reading many stories in groups from women that talked about what you described. Sudden intense increased movement that was totally abnormal. I don't know why it isn't recognized in the medical community. Do women not relate this to their doctor after their child is born still? Do they not add 2+2 and think well just maybe this could be distress in the baby that needs to be checked our? I don't know but it for sure isn't unusual but is usual enough in stillbirths that it should be a sign something is wrong. Since your experience came and then things went back to normal until you labored and had Kaia who was born still how did that relate to her death? I don't have the answers but I don't know that you could have done anything differently that would have made a difference. Even if you had gone to the hospital immediately and she was delivered by section when you got there would she have been alive? I don't know. No one knows what the increased insane movement means. Distress yes of course but why, what did it mean was happening to the baby in the womb? What did it mean? I really want to know and what should be done about it when it happens so that perhaps if you hurry fast enough the baby could be delivered right away and saved. What happened to Kaia in there, something happened to her, she was in trouble but what was it? This needs to be studied and there needs to be a protocol for this kind of event so that women can go to the hospital when it happens and the babies can be delivered asap. I am so sorry
I think you’re upset because of the possibility of having another boy. I feel so sorry her .
someone should collate this information as its so obviously important then more babies would live ,maybe that is what your purpose is stefanie 😢😢
Whoa that's really scary, that should be something pregnant women should know to look out for.
I’m so sorry you are going through this. I am 35 weeks along and just want to say thank you for posting this and educating people. You can save so many lives just by educating people on this.
Lost my baby 1 year ago stillbirth and I noticed an increase in movement the night before he die. But like you said we are not taken into consideration if we go to L&D we get turned away. And doctors always assure you that increase movement is good.
I had an increase in movement and I had a lot of Braxton hicks, but what I know now was labor pains.
I sincerely hope things change. It will be patient driven however. A friend of mine changed something in the health system by writing letters and telling their story over and over.
Same with another video I saw ~~ major increase in movement night before
I am so sorry for your loss. Thank you for the information. You and your little girl will be saving a lot of lives. 🙏❤
I've been able to find studies that say increase in fetal movements can be a sign of fetal distress. It's sad it's not widespread information. I don't get why doctors aren't warning their patients. This is the first I'm hearing of it too. It's upsetting.
I love you all, Momma. 💛💛💛💛🐈🐈🐈🐈🐈🐈🐈🐈🐈🐈🐈🐈🐈
Stop that you might give birth again and get her back you don’t know ♥️
My sweet girl I am so sorry for your loss but please do not go down the route of blaming yourself there was nothing you could do and even if you had gone in the medicine isn’t it there to let the doctors know what they could possibly do where would they possibly start please don’t torture yourself
My Obgyn was one of the most famous here in this city and every week I told her that my baby was breech until I had an emergency c section . I believe you, I feel you, I am sooo sorry, I have no words for your loss
I really really relate with everything you are saying ❤❤