At this particular show, Joan Rivers had been on stage before Milton and she told the “When I die, I want to go like my Grandfather, peacefully, in my sleep. Not screaming and yelling like his passengers” joke. Hence his reference to one of his many Grandfathers being in Joan Rivers’ Grandfather’s car.
This was a short version. I have only seen this show on UA-cam, so that one was probably short, too, but this was even shorter. He talked about lots more grandfathers, and then said, "My grandmother is confused." My other favorite came towards the end of the bit, when he said, "How many of you are into candles and aromatherapy?" Everyone had caught on by this time, so, although a number of people snickered, no one applauded. He said, "Too bad, I had a good answer for that."
He had to finish before the end of the running gag... "Any aromatherapists here ? (audience is now wised up, so laughter but no 'woo') - Shame, I had a good line ready......."
saw milton jones live, for some reason, every comedian i see live always spots me and makes a joke, noel fielding asked if he could have my sweetcorn, bill bailey asked me to brush the clouds away, nina conti had me on stage as a human puppet, but she put lag between the mouth piece and her voice because my height has a "delay" and milton jones said "good thing im not called jack, otherwise id be sweating, look at him, hes probably thinking, feee fi fo fum, get on with show already" im great for comedians, being 7'7" and a bulky guy as well makes me a great source of improv best one was when sarah millican spotted me during a show and said "hes a big fella aint he, stand up for a second pet" i stood up, lighting guy shone a light on me, then sarah millican goes " id be tempted to give you a cuddle but im pretty sure id just faceplant right into your willy" paused for a moment then went "actually that sounds like a great idea" then goes "whose this next to you then\2 (pointing at the women next to me) i tell her its my wife, and sarah goes "lucky girl" then asks my wife to stand up, which was funny because im 7'7" and my wife is an adorable 4'7" after seeing the height difference sarah then goes "your poor fanny" after another 5 minutes of gags at our expense she then says "thats why i love live shows, you never who you will meet"
All his grandads is brilliant 😆 He once did it where he said "we had a family Christmas at my parents house this year, but I couldn't get in, my grandads turned up" 😆
The joke about 2 private investigators following each other Check out max fish He does some cool stuff and he's got a video where he hires 2 private investigators to secretly follow each other.
I have a suggestion for you both. Kevin Bridges, if facebook was a pub ua-cam.com/video/QhhtBk2T8KY/v-deo.html you may need subtitles as he has quite a thick Scottish accent.
At this particular show, Joan Rivers had been on stage before Milton and she told the “When I die, I want to go like my Grandfather, peacefully, in my sleep. Not screaming and yelling like his passengers” joke. Hence his reference to one of his many Grandfathers being in Joan Rivers’ Grandfather’s car.
I like the one were he says “if you Google lost medieval servant boy”, “it’ll say’this page cannot be found’
Seeing him tonight at a comedy fundraiser in the UK - can't wait!
He follows up with Any aromatherapists here tonight?
I've seen him live. One of my favourite comedians
This was a short version. I have only seen this show on UA-cam, so that one was probably short, too, but this was even shorter. He talked about lots more grandfathers, and then said, "My grandmother is confused." My other favorite came towards the end of the bit, when he said, "How many of you are into candles and aromatherapy?" Everyone had caught on by this time, so, although a number of people snickered, no one applauded. He said, "Too bad, I had a good answer for that."
Tim Vine is the master. In Guiness Book of Records for speedy one liners.
He had to finish before the end of the running gag...
"Any aromatherapists here ?
(audience is now wised up, so laughter but no 'woo')
- Shame, I had a good line ready......."
saw milton jones live, for some reason, every comedian i see live always spots me and makes a joke, noel fielding asked if he could have my sweetcorn, bill bailey asked me to brush the clouds away, nina conti had me on stage as a human puppet, but she put lag between the mouth piece and her voice because my height has a "delay" and milton jones said "good thing im not called jack, otherwise id be sweating, look at him, hes probably thinking, feee fi fo fum, get on with show already"
im great for comedians, being 7'7" and a bulky guy as well makes me a great source of improv
best one was when sarah millican spotted me during a show and said "hes a big fella aint he, stand up for a second pet" i stood up, lighting guy shone a light on me, then sarah millican goes " id be tempted to give you a cuddle but im pretty sure id just faceplant right into your willy" paused for a moment then went "actually that sounds like a great idea" then goes "whose this next to you then\2 (pointing at the women next to me) i tell her its my wife, and sarah goes "lucky girl" then asks my wife to stand up, which was funny because im 7'7" and my wife is an adorable 4'7" after seeing the height difference sarah then goes "your poor fanny" after another 5 minutes of gags at our expense she then says "thats why i love live shows, you never who you will meet"
Look up Danny Bhoy on live at the Apollo, "Gecko in Australia".
Love Milton Jones, another silly one liner check out Tim Vine
Rodney was the best of the best when it came to one liners!
Watch Dave Allen on airplanes. or Adam and Eve in my opinion the GOAT comedian.
All his grandads is brilliant 😆
He once did it where he said "we had a family Christmas at my parents house this year, but I couldn't get in, my grandads turned up" 😆
Story teller's, then Bill Bailey and Michael McIntyre are really good.
If you get a taste for the this style of comedy Tim Vine live at the apollo is very good
❤ I subscribed and hit the bell
Excellent, more willy please, especially Bob
More what?😅
@@damienyoung751 oh no, damn you predictive text, oops 😂😂😂
The joke about 2 private investigators following each other
Check out max fish
He does some cool stuff and he's got a video where he hires 2 private investigators to secretly follow each other.
Nick: "Would anyone like to pay me please? To do the lame things I do?"
UA-cam: "Yes. Here is $12.56"
One liners Tim vine he hold the world record for the most in a minute
In an hour
Eddie Izzard Stand Up 🙏🏻
Milton jones and another one tim vine are more oun comedians without vuglarty but also kind who people love or hate
The pope joke is about spelling
Milton is a Christian so is always safe to listen to!
That answers my next question as WHY.
@@derekardito2032 wit doesn’t require vulgarity. ❤️✝️
@@kathramsay1569 no, it requires humour, the "Beano" is a child's comic for a reason.
@@derekardito2032 haven’t a clue what you mean but God bless. ❤️✝️
@@kathramsay1569 now that I can believe.
Just a thought, a bit late ... But wasn't Groucho Marx the King of the One Liners?
Need to watch Bernard manning
I have a suggestion for you both. Kevin Bridges, if facebook was a pub
ua-cam.com/video/QhhtBk2T8KY/v-deo.html you may need subtitles as he has quite a thick Scottish accent.
You have to watch mickey flanagan, absolutely superb comedian.
Have you heard of Rising Damp series very funny. Great.🇬🇧
Apart from Leonard was a sex pest and weirdo
Not his best stuff.... he's funnier when its spontaneous like on 'Mock The Week'
Why do you shake your head at the jokes? What are you saying no to?
It’s just a reaction we (I) make. As if to say, “I can’t believe he said that,” or “Oh man!” Multiple meanings.