How I Overcame My Fear of Performing Music in Public Instantly

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  • Опубліковано 14 лис 2024

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  • @RichLunaMusic
    @RichLunaMusic Місяць тому +13

    I was always told that unless they're musicians themselves, they won't know you messed up. That was the revelation for me.

    • @SouthShorePianoSchool
      @SouthShorePianoSchool  Місяць тому

      Yes, exactly!!! And the oddity with music school is you’re always performing for other students and/or professors, not your average concert-goer. Thank you for the insightful comment!

  • @sammyy1105
    @sammyy1105 11 місяців тому +20

    1:19-1:45 this is me!!!!😭 i felt bad after performing for being out of tempo and missing a few notes. ughh it hurts knowing that i have fully committed the sheet music to my memory as best as i can. after the performance, i sat on the back stage for a few minutes reflecting. i gathered myself and face my friends. i was shocked to see happy faces and they were looking for me for a while now. they congratulated me for a good performance. i kept asking, 'are my mistakes that obvious? is the performance good?' but they said it was very good. i had a sign of relief after seeing them enjoy the show.🙂

  • @vic6695
    @vic6695 11 місяців тому +16

    Thank you for sharing your story. I just came across your channel. I'm 66 and have been taking lessons for almost 4 years. I have a great teacher who is very encouraging. Last spring, I decided to play in our recital. I practiced Handel's Passaglia until I had it memorized and felt pretty confidant about it. When it was my turn, I went up to the piano, got my bearings, then made the biggest mistake I could...I looked out at the audience. There were maybe 70 or 80 people there, and quite a few were my family, but immediately I tensed-up, and my right hand started shaking uncontrollably! Not just a little shake, but it was like I was shooting a herd of flies. I took a deep breath, and began. It started OK, but in the middle my hand acted like it had a mind of it's own. I thought it sounded terrible, but I never broke stride. I finished alright, but couldn't get off that stage fast enough. Even though I was totally humiliated, people came up to me afterwards and told me how great it sounded. I couldn't believe it. My teacher said, as long as you keep the rhythm, most people won't notice wrong notes. I guess he was right. I might try it again in the recital next spring... we shall see. I appreciate you sharing your story, as I could really relate. I'll go into the next one with a better attitude for sure.

    • @PianoMatronNeeNee
      @PianoMatronNeeNee 2 місяці тому

      Really awesome you actually did it. Hats off to you. I’m still to scared to play live. Thanks for sharing your story ❤

  • @petergroverd6626
    @petergroverd6626 10 місяців тому +6

    You have just lit a light bulb for me as I am practicing for an appearance in a concert in Feb.
    You are right that the people who come to see you want to share your success and forgive any mistakes.

    • @SouthShorePianoSchool
      @SouthShorePianoSchool  10 місяців тому +1

      Thank you so much! - I am thrilled and humbled that you found this helpful. Best wishes for your concert in February! What will you be performing?

  • @kimjihye184
    @kimjihye184 7 місяців тому +9

    Omg...I've been struggling with stage fright since I was 12.I tried meditation, medicine to press down blood pressure, watching many advice videos, books.. but your video is the best. You saved my life!!

  • @Rose-kr4ss
    @Rose-kr4ss 5 місяців тому +4

    i just wanna say thankkk you so much , you've been so real n honest sharing your story in its raw genuine form, something we all piano players experience and still dont realize it

  • @n1iwr
    @n1iwr 2 роки тому +2

    Thank u!! Thank u!! The takeaway is exactly what I needed to hear as I start playing in SSPS’s recitals!!! Last inperson recital, I got so nervous I could barely breathe but as u pointed out, the audience members were there to share in our music and really didn’t care that I had made mistakes. Many people I spoke w after had very kind things to say. I walked away from the recital able to positively reframe my thoughts on my performance. Thanks for sharing ur story!!

  • @Kris-cl5nl
    @Kris-cl5nl Рік тому +3

    Thank you, my fear is all my friends and family know I play a few instruments and always want to hear me play. I get worried they will be disappointed because there are so many amazing amateur artists accessible on social media now and I don’t meet up to that. So before recording or sending a video I’d make sure it was perfect but when I play them back I still hear all the mistakes or areas for improvement. And you’re right most people who know me tell me it’s great even thou they don’t get thousands of views. I love rewatching my videos because I know the effort it took in learning that.
    I also know that non musicians are impressed by basic skills lol

    • @awakenwithoutcoffee
      @awakenwithoutcoffee 10 місяців тому

      I have been playing for 15 years and I still have that all the time haha. Sometimes the opposite happens and I get surprised about how high my skill is. At other times Im just not feeling, playing sloppy and boring, yet I still play. I do this to confront myself and learn how to let go of fear.

  • @Imgodwin__
    @Imgodwin__ 2 місяці тому +1

    This is really helpful because I'm about going into that adventure of having opportunities of performing publicly at events ... I'm feeling anxious already

    • @SouthShorePianoSchool
      @SouthShorePianoSchool  2 місяці тому

      Thank you so much for your kind post! I’m so glad you found it helpful 😊❤️. Best wishes!

    • @Imgodwin__
      @Imgodwin__ 2 місяці тому

      Thank you

  • @Emmi3214
    @Emmi3214 8 місяців тому

    You are helping me so much!! I have a competition tomorrow and I have a solo, I’m terrified and this helped and are helping me so much!!! TYSM

  • @PianoMatronNeeNee
    @PianoMatronNeeNee 2 місяці тому +1

    Thank you so much for this ❤❤❤❤❤❤❤. Appreciate you sharing your story 👍👍👍

  • @heidivanooijen-blezer142
    @heidivanooijen-blezer142 7 місяців тому +1

    Thank you for this great insight. I've never thought about it this way. You've helped me a lot! 😅

  • @saracdfullerton
    @saracdfullerton 3 місяці тому +1

    Great message! I needed to hear this. Thank you 🙏 🎹

  • @MarciasCottagebytheSea
    @MarciasCottagebytheSea 3 місяці тому +1

    thank you so much for this message!🎵

  • @Ludwig_Van_Aljundi
    @Ludwig_Van_Aljundi Рік тому +2

    Thank you!!!!!!

  • @Tep_Music
    @Tep_Music Рік тому +2

    This helped! thank you!!

  • @ChoBee333
    @ChoBee333 Рік тому +4

    This helps a lot! 😊

  • @riicc1253
    @riicc1253 Рік тому +1

    Thank you

  • @jimh1487
    @jimh1487 4 місяці тому +1

    Very informative, thank you.

  • @patrickvanbramer5037
    @patrickvanbramer5037 2 місяці тому

    You are Awesome man

  • @TylrVncnt
    @TylrVncnt 2 місяці тому

    Soo true, great story!

  • @flamingomastergd2014
    @flamingomastergd2014 7 місяців тому +3

    Your my clone in feelings

  • @haoyangwu6173
    @haoyangwu6173 Рік тому +1

    Thank you! But one questions please. If I make mistake in a concert which is free then is not that bad. But when I make mistake in a concert which the audience paid for, then there is a problem. How can deal with this please? I mean people paid money for the concert, of course they are going to expect a perfect concert. If I make a mistake, someone is kind and let it slide, but someone will take this seriously and even be furious with the performer and demand to have the refund. And he or she has every right to do so. Because people work hard for their money.

    • @SouthShorePianoSchool
      @SouthShorePianoSchool  Рік тому +6

      Thank you for your message, and I understand what you're saying! But I kindly disagree with how you're perceiving the audience experience when they pay to go to a concert.
      I don't think people pay to go to a concert because they're expecting a perfect performance. If people wanted that, they could just look up someone famous on UA-cam, or stay home and listen to a 'perfect' recording. It's about experiencing live music, complete with any flaws that may creep in.
      Now don't get me wrong, we want to be prepared. Watching a solo recital full of wrong notes, memory slips, etc. can make the experience awkward.
      But normal, human mistakes are part of what makes live music so worth attending. If people have such a problem with a small slip here or there, then they're probably attending the concert for the wrong reasons. Plus, as you know, a good performance is about so much more than playing all the right notes. It's possible to hear a note-perfect performance and be bored as can be if the performance lacks expression or nuance.
      And I've never heard of anyone asking for their money back for a concert because the performer made some mistakes. I think most see it is as the same as going to a movie - if the movie sucks, that's just part of the experience, you can't (and it's expected that you can't) ask for your money back.
      Hope this is somewhat insightful! Thank you again for your thoughtful comment. :-)

    • @chrissilman8495
      @chrissilman8495 Рік тому +3

      If someone is furious about a mistake then it’s definitely not about the mistake. They are looking for anything to be furious. You’ll never make them happy so why even worry about it. Also, I have never seen anyone ever get furious at a performance. I’m sure it’s happened but I’ve never experienced that. And, again, that’s simply an angry person who you can’t please.

    • @MarciasCottagebytheSea
      @MarciasCottagebytheSea 3 місяці тому

      @@SouthShorePianoSchool wonderful inside… Again, thank you!

  • @_evangeline8011
    @_evangeline8011 Місяць тому

    thank you for this! my problem is, i play cello, so when i shake i get shakey bow... do you have any tips on making the shaking stop? as that is the main root of my fears (the shaky bow lol)

    • @SouthShorePianoSchool
      @SouthShorePianoSchool  Місяць тому +1

      Thank you for your post, that's such a great question! I had this same problem for years and years.
      Personally, I'm convinced that the shaking hands is part of the fight-or-flight response, where when we perform in public, our outdated defense mechanisms think we're in real danger. Because thousands of years ago, if you "stood out" or were "different" from your tribe in any way, your life WOULD be in danger, because you'd be thrown out to face the wilderness and animals on your own.
      While society has progressed, our fight or flight response has remained the same haha.
      I think an awareness of where this comes from biologically is the first step, so the logic part of your mind understands that it's kind of silly the things that kick in.
      And then, past this, I would suggest a couple things. I've found that breathwork and meditation help a LOT to stay in the moment and not let the emotions and fears take over. Wim Hof breathing in particular (you can Google it) I've found to be especially helpful.
      And then, performing in public as much as you can, practicing these breathing/meditation exercises on the regular, and also with the understanding going in that you're not going to die (lol) if you play a wrong note, which is where the shakiness comes from, I expect that it would improve over time.
      Please let me know if this helps!

    • @_evangeline8011
      @_evangeline8011 Місяць тому

      @@SouthShorePianoSchool thank you so so so much!! i have a performance of faure Elegie soon, and ill let you know!

  • @somethingsomethingjavi7341
    @somethingsomethingjavi7341 2 місяці тому

    Bro’s teacher was fletcher 😂

  • @JohnMarcell
    @JohnMarcell 8 місяців тому

    Fuck man i cut my teeth tonight for the first time, trying not to blow my brains out.

  • @bavariasuhl
    @bavariasuhl 6 місяців тому +1

    talk to damn much - get to the point already

    • @SouthShorePianoSchool
      @SouthShorePianoSchool  6 місяців тому +3

      Thank you for the feedback, this is something I’ve been working on lol

    • @titangs422
      @titangs422 5 місяців тому +5

      @@SouthShorePianoSchooldon’t respond in kindness to this fool. Talk all you need to sir

    • @kidseducationalplaykidspla965
      @kidseducationalplaykidspla965 Місяць тому

      Your to negative shut the hell up