She's an excellent communicator. She doesn't sugarcoat things to spare your feelings. She tells it like it is. I love clear communication. Leaves no room for error.
Yet she is sugarcoating her feelings. She needs to ask the man is he gay or bi sexual, in private just between them, because that is apart of why she broke it off from him. She knows deep down she is not what he truly wants despite him having love for her. But she is his best friend and he does not want to lose her, so that more than anything why they both are so sad. She even said in the interview "It's my hope that you work to be more open with me..that you're being kind to yourself." I believe she knows
@@nadia4999 I feel she's a great communicator. I beg to differ; she didn't sugarcoat; instead, she is allowing him to open up on his timing. He admitted that he was hesitant to reveal himself in fear of losing her; she heard him and then challenged him to open up; on the strength of their friendship. I believe she handled that as a great friend: take your time; I am here to listen when you're ready. That's a beautiful companionship. I wonder, though, if he desires to be in a polyamorous relationship with her, and that's the real question he is hiding. Overall I felt this was a beautiful discussion/interaction.
this is what i was thinking-- in some way i am envious about how clearly she is able to do so; whenever i want to get a certain point across i always find myself breaking down LOL
It can't be romantic love, whatever that is suppose to mean, when the man wants to be with men too. Maybe that is apart of his depression and what he is battling. He needs to just let it go and be who he feels he is. She knows he loves her, and she loves him, but she knows they are best friends. Any man and woman that are so called best friends, but not together there is a reason or several reasons. And 1 reason is because he likes men like you do.
@@alissabee5923 She broke up with him because she knew he would not break up with her. He loves her, and she loves him, but it's like a dependent type of love, and not a love between two healthy individuals. She did the best thing for herself in a sense hoping it would force him to just come out with it, and be himself. But in his head he is afraid he will lose her totally, and he already knows he has disappointed her because he can't really give her what she wants. She needs to tell him she understands, and they will always be friends no matter what. She needs to find her a Man and keep it moving.
Oooh this felt familiar. “ I might’ve would’ve stayed longer but doesn’t mean it would have lasted”. Choose happiness. Choose purpose. Choose yourself.
Seems like she was the one to end the relationship.... extremely brave girl, that takes a tremendous amount of courage to walk away from someone you love so deeply for 9 years...
@@infotech6075 Cultivating a healthy relationship is a lot more than just loving someone, and for whatever reason, she felt like she needed to end it, doesn't mean that she didn't love him though
@@loomonda18 Women are leaving men at a 80% rate in marriage. That's not called having courage that's called not bring dedicated enough to work through your issues. Like marriage, relationships are hardwork to maintain. By statistics, the problem with alot of women is when the hardwork part comes around they give up. I don't know their relationship history so I'm not going to go all the way in, but if she wasn't being beat or cheated on I find it hard to believe she loved him that deeply when she left, seriously.
@@infotech6075 It takes a lot more to have a functioning relationship that just to be madly in love, despite what Hollywood and Netflix tell you. Because at the end of the day you have to deal with life and if your core values and wishes don't align it's just better to walk away than to break trying to make something work that just won't.
Better to stay friends, than bring kids in, and resent one another because one wanted a family and the other didn’t. If your core values don’t align, don’t force it. There are over a billion people on this planet, find someone else
It already is based on his response of feeling regret once she starts a family with someone else. It’s beautiful that they were able to end things amicably, but that’s also the primary reason why it will be difficult to rid those feelings.
@@soph9060 he suppresses his feelings to keep everyone else in a good space or to keep the peace but she would rather him say whats on his mind so that they can work together to resolve the issue.
You heard “confused”? I thought he was also strong in his decision about not having children but was reconsidering marriage to her, as he was realizing how their dynamic may shift again and not support the friendship once she is married to someone else. “Doing the other side of life”. Either way I loved see young black people being so self aware and able to communicate, gives me hope
She is strong in her decision because she loves him. She knows she is not what he truly wants. He has not fully accepted who he is, and she seems to be waiting for him to stop battling within himself, and just admit that he is gay. He is confused, because he wants her in his life, but she is not being fulfilled in a way that maybe she believes a woman should feel for a man. She is not aroused or feel romantic vibes from him. I mean the purple hair is one clue. He is like her girlfriend, but he is a man, and thus her best friend, yet they are not together. She had no choice but to set him free.
@@zenaisoffline862 I am not sure, but he comes off in this video as such. He might not even realize it himself, or maybe he does, and he is fighting it which is okay. Either way, the 1 female he loves broke up with him because she knows something is just off.
Omg I need a part 2,3 & 4 of them! It feels like their story is still being written! Please let’s have them back like a year from now to see where they’re at!
To be honest, as deep as this seems, I could very much see her not communicating with him in a year because she is confused by his behavior and she realizes how much growing and personal reflection he needs to do before he can be what she wants and needs. Staying friends in a situation like that can be confusing, and kinda hurtful. Sometimes you just need to cut the ropes...
I love the fact that are mature enough to maintain their friendship after the romantic part of them ended. Their openness is refreshing. . . Elon was giving me Kerry Washington vibes.
I thought it was bc he wasn’t interested in women... she’s the one that wishes it could last....he just doesn’t know what he wants exactly point proven @8:30......
I don’t like that he asked the marriage q but I loved her answer. He doesn’t want her to give up on him but he’s not ready yet and she clearly needs more than he can offer her at that time.
I'm actually glad he did. He needed to know and understand how she feels about that option ever being there. He also needed to know that marriage doesn't mean forever, necessarily and know that it wouldn't fix the issues.
I feel like I'm watching myself right now. Two months ago I ended a 6 years relationship because he didn't believe in marriage, he didn't want to have kids, and we were planning on going to Canada together but in the end he said he didn't want to go. He was saying "yes" to everything because of the love he felt for me but he had different goals. He wants me back but what's the point if we don't agree on those things? The pain in my chest has been incredible, I've never cried this much in my life, but I have to stay true to myself and so does he. I hope we could see each other again some day and realize this was the best for both of us.
I had the same feeling! I went through this too! I ended my 6-year long relationship last September. It was SO hard to do and I still miss him, but I still feel it was the right decision, because just like the people in this video, I wanted more verbal affirmation/more affection in general, and I wanted children and he didn't. Also, we broke up for similar reasons once three years ago. Then we got back together and tried again, and we still couldn't compromise because finally, we just don't want the same things in life or the same kind of relationship. Soooooo nothing has changed except now I'm older. He's a great person, but it's just not a sustainable dynamic, and I know I deserve more. Your situation sounds similar. It sounds like he doesn't want the same things as you. I'm sure he had a ton of love for you, but sadly, it's true: sometimes love is not enough. From one person who went through this to another, sending you support and affirmation. You're right to stick to your guns and not get back with him if you know he's not going to be able to give you what you want. It's hard AF, but it sounds like it absolutely was the right decision. Sending all of the support!
@@soulfullygraced2521 I most def agree... but he could just mean some things he wanted to do/try in bed and maybe she didn’t want to🤷🏾♀️. Just trying to give him the benefit of the doubt here
I’m struggling so hard to learn how to communicate like this lady right here. I appreciate her clarity in expressing herself without attacking or self pity. God bless her. I wish this guy well too. He is trying and that’s beautiful
I am mesmerized by her way of communicating. She needs to create a curriculum for an AP Conversation class. Or teach Advanced Level Dialogue 101. Ma'am! 🎓🎓
@@shellcharles3633 I think the same thing. She used a lot of big words that made her sound more articulated however she wasn’t really saying anything. She also was telling him a lot of how HE was feeling which is not good communication to tell someone else what THEY feel.
OMGosh...I adore her!!! She'd be a bomb therapist. She deserves someone capable of loving her as deeply and richly as she loves them. Best wishes to them both.
They really do love one another. I can especially see it in his eyes and in the way that he expresses himself to her. There is nothing more wonderful in this life than love. I hope that they give love another try when they get older and more mature.
@Infinity 369 @Infinity 369 He is. He seems to have some commitment and abandonment issues. I think that she loves him, but those issues made her bow out of loving him the way that she used to. I was once in love with someone who was emotionally unavailable, and once I learned that I could never have that person the way that I truly wanted and needed them I knew that I had to make a conscious decision to move on with my life. We just weren't meant to be. And that's okay. We live and we learn. These two are still really young, and I hope that they don't let time slip away then look back with regrets.
You can be in love with someone, but unfortunately that is not always “the one”. Sometimes the one you loved and didn’t end up with makes you learn your biggest lesson in life.
@@sydneymichelle8357 That is so true! I'm so grateful that he and I met, and I learned a lot about myself in the short time that we spent together. I wouldn't take it back even if I could, but I can't lie and say that being in love alone while with him wasn't one of the hardest things I've ever experienced. I love him still, but I've finally come to accept that we just weren't meant to be. I hope that these two mature and experience life but while going down separate paths they understand that the love they have is rare, and it should never be taken for granted.
Its called growing up and growing apart. He is wearing an emotional mask, and has fear of vulnerability and abandonment, which can create a soul tie of codependency, and she may have expressed this through her anxiety.
They are so self-aware and introspective and there is so much love between them. 10:30 “The eyes, Chico! They never lie”. This video gave me all the feels!
wow, she is amazing at articulating herself and understanding him without retorting to any negativity, that is great talent. Wish them both the best in life!
That was VERY intense. I feel like I couldn't even breathe listening to them...really her. That's somebody who has worked on herself and know exactly who she is. And same for the dude, but....just...wow.
This feels so familiar. She’s sitting there with her teenage love trying to talk to him about what went wrong and while she grown up and she knows what she wants he’s still that teenage boy and he still has a lot of growing up to do. The love is still there, and it might not even happen with anyone else in the way that it was there before, but she has to move on for her life and her futures sake. Because she can’t just keep waiting for him to finally grow up and be able to communicate and work towards what she wants in life.
That timetable can be treacherous, I suggest young women beware, now in my 40's I can tell you most of my women friends are disappointed in letting go of those young loves looking for the guy who was more mature, more established, etc..... Life is long, forever is even longer, so if you plan on being with someone forever why not give it the time it deserves?
@@quincyhyde8760 Imagine suggesting to a man or woman to take a 50/50 on very, serious non-negotiables. "Childhood best friends with no communication skills in the relationship, and still struggling through that now + one partner wants to get married and the other doesn't want kids and doesn't see the point in marriage."
I’m going through my first break up in an adult relationship and it’s so life changing and hard. This video helped me, though. I feel not alone in the pain and complexity that is relationships and heart break. We also ended it on good terms, just needed different things
Time truly heals ladies. I’ve wiped many tears. And it sounds so cliche but... you are enough. Once you truly learn that and love yourself, real unconditional love will come because you wont even tolerate anything less. And if it doesn’t you’ll still be fine. I’m married now for 10 years but break ups were trying especially because I wanted to be in a loving relationship so bad but that thought process was so toxic and I’m sure I was giving off desperado vibes even though I tried not to. Moral is this will strengthen you. Think of it as an emotional workout
@@mrs.harris933 thank you for the empowering words. I already knew I have a lot to heal and to truly learn self love, and I know this is just a part of that process. Sending you good vibes back!
Why are people shocked that they can and do speak with depth and honesty. I readily admit that the average couple never attain this level of communication together, but 1) their both intelligent with a vocabulary 2) she's undergone specific therapy to address and attack her anxieties 3) they have a friendship that spans the majority of their lives on earth.
He seems like he has an avoidant personality type. He is afraid of being abandoned, so he pulls away, he doesn't show himself fully, he won't commit fully (marriage etc)
Man if that isn’t me. It’s a defense mechanism and it not only isn’t fair to your partner but you also end up missing out on vulnerable connections and it sucks. I am starting therapy soon.
You can but baby girl is over the bullshit and it's obvious. Leaving someone you love hurts so much and it takes a special kind of courage to accept that it was best for both of you.
I hate that it's so common for men to feel this way. Being afraid to freely express themselves without fear of judgement or abandonment. I wish men were given better tools for communication and intimacy. Society truly has failed men as a whole.
Thankfully as a gay man who was given the ability to express my self as a adult to my family, friendship and failed and ongoing intimate relationships. I got the tools to express my intimate side of myself without feeling judge or abandoned.
A lot of these comments are concerning because it seems like y'all either fell for the proposal line or his lovesick gaze. Her response was PERFECT. Hypothetical or not, to flip from not wanting marriage & kids to proposing on her way out is incredibly manipulative. I'm so glad she shook off the shock he was hoping for and kept her mind clear. This seems like it's even a draining friendship since she's shouldering the bulk of the emotional intelligence, communication while he's still clearly pining. I hope they consider trying to detach - BEST friend exes are just a mess anyway. 💜
This was an interesting take on the conversation, I didn't realize this until you said it. I also feel like perhaps he didn't mean to be manipulative and is still just pining after her, I feel like he asked that honestly without ill intent (even though it's still manipulative at face value - but maybe he didn't recognize that - I also could just be naive lol!)
@@iRockU96 No, you're absolutely right! I didn't want to make my comment too long 🥴, but was going to get into how not all manipulation is malicious or even intentional. A lot of us play mind games daily without realizing it. So he may have been genuine to some degree about wondering how she would have answered back then, but his facial expressions during her reply also gave me "it was worth a shot" vibes 😂 She is very mature but holding onto this situation so closely has too much backfire potential and she already said it gives new partners pause. Mentioning she felt safe with him also sounds more like familiarity. This only ends okay if he first starts to work through his reasoning for having a negative opinion of family *AND* starts to reach her level to share the emotional load. 🤷🏿♀️
Oh my gosh, you two seem both still so in love. If you look up attachment styles, my guess is that he is an avoidant type. My husband and I dealt with this (I was fearful-anxious type). The only way to fix it is to go to therapy (not forever), but just long enough to understand each other. He probably longs for the relationship, but also feels more comfortable with the distance in this friendship form, while she wanted more and that's why they couldn't make it work. The kids thing is important too, and could be a reason to not be together, but his lack of desire for kids might also be attached to his distancing attachment style. Hope he explores this and they can possibly give this a shot before it is too late. I could be totally wrong here, but that was just my impression. I wish them both luck! They both have beautiful hearts!
you could see the confusion and frustration that formed when she thought he meant that he was going to propose, because that was what seemed to be a key part in why they broke up, then she realized he asked "what if I was going to"
She seems to have such a calm genuine soul. Very rare to come across women like that. I could definitely see why a man would be hung up over her. Obviously I don’t know the ins and outs of the relationship but she seems super dope.
I admire her. She aspires to follow her own dreams and knows that both not sharing those dreams completely, that it was time to depart, but they both do seem better as friends. It’s sad it took almost a decade but i do see why because they were so young at 19 and i feel like he is unsure of what he truly wants, most likely acts out of fear from reaching a point of anxiety which is why he mentioned The Marriage question, he didnt want to lose her to prevent the mental damage in himself and she had the perfect answer to his question.
This is a beautiful, open, and honest conversation. It’s clear they know and deeply care for each other. I hope they can both have closure. She seems to have a clear vision of what she wants and needs. Bless them both. ❤️
I think she seems so psychologically astute and mature and that he's a little young for her. Not ready or interested in getting married, but "What if I'd have asked you?". What the hell! I think a lot of men are not interested in the committment but don't want a woman to move on to someone who is. It's like they want to reserve her (string her along). I'm sure this could go both ways too with women not wanting the commitment.
Whoa! this was so good, they look young, however im 35 and I felt this!.. She answered very articulate. I commend them for this !! I just recently went through a relationship and we cut it off and I feel as though im looking in a mirror. However the guy wanted children etc and I dont. My main reason for letting it go was because of Lewis "Biggest Fear" this was very powerful
@@jessicamcdaniels2337 Marriage, 100%...I have children and he doesnt. I know I don't want anymore...and i cant block him from that blessing. I love and respect him to much.
The Mckinsons here..... We are early!!! It is sooo refreshing to see young people communicating so effectively. Great to see as we often leave relationships with no closure but having closure is the best. He really does adore her, look how he looks at her!!!
She is definitely a psychologist at heart. Taking into consideration the reasoning behind a person's behavior as opposed to taking offense. She is wise beyond her years and so articulate. She needs someone a little older perhaps. She ahead of her age.
@A T my gaydar was through the roooooooooof but I’ve learnt to retract myself from imposing sexuality to people tho.. maybe it’s just his prettiness that his blindsiding but dang
And here we have a young Big Sean and a young Rapsody.....on a serious note, this Is a really great dialogue their having, great display of listening and understanding.
Their relationship seems so good together, sucks when it doesn’t work how you want it to. At least they are able to continue being good friends. Whatever they have, it’s beautiful.
I have this game for long term couples and it’s so amazing my bf and I have been together for 4 years and I feel like it’s really hard for him to communicate his feelings and emotions and this game has helped him open up and we both reallly enjoy it everytime we play I feel really close to him we rediscover what sometimes u forget when ur w someone for or things we take for granted or haven’t thought about. I cry almost everytime cuz I get so happy.
They should stay friends and not be in a relationship. Long term they have core issues that are not resolvable without someone living a life they don’t want. Their relationship has to be reestablished in order to maintain friendship with their future spouses otherwise it’s going to be a jealous mess. When he described his biggest fear it seemed like he’s not going to be ok with her moving on and being happy. That’s definitely a red flag but the fact they were able to communicate all of this is amazing
Omgosh she is so articulate, he was not ready for her but that's ok because I don't feel like they should have been together, if anything it was comfortable and familiar for them to couple up. It seems as if he is afraid to harm her with whatever he is holding back.
She's an excellent communicator. She doesn't sugarcoat things to spare your feelings. She tells it like it is. I love clear communication. Leaves no room for error.
❤❤
Ugh!!!!! Thisssss!!!!
Yes, absolutely. Perfectly written.
Yet she is sugarcoating her feelings. She needs to ask the man is he gay or bi sexual, in private just between them, because that is apart of why she broke it off from him. She knows deep down she is not what he truly wants despite him having love for her. But she is his best friend and he does not want to lose her, so that more than anything why they both are so sad. She even said in the interview "It's my hope that you work to be more open with me..that you're being kind to yourself." I believe she knows
@@nadia4999
I feel she's a great communicator.
I beg to differ; she didn't sugarcoat; instead, she is allowing him to open up on his timing. He admitted that he was hesitant to reveal himself in fear of losing her; she heard him and then challenged him to open up; on the strength of their friendship. I believe she handled that as a great friend: take your time; I am here to listen when you're ready. That's a beautiful companionship.
I wonder, though, if he desires to be in a polyamorous relationship with her, and that's the real question he is hiding.
Overall I felt this was a beautiful discussion/interaction.
Her ability to articulate her thoughts/emotions is amazing.
truly. she is how i strive to be
this is what i was thinking-- in some way i am envious about how clearly she is able to do so; whenever i want to get a certain point across i always find myself breaking down LOL
right😍her words flow so smoothly like pouring a glass of milk
I completely agree.
I agree
"it's hard to imagine having not known you because of how much knowing you, formed who i am" brb, your gurl gotta cry
Lol
ah fr
Lmao brb crying in the club 😂😂
Bro , I'm crying, that's how I feel...fuck bye I'm gonna cry more in the corner
😂😂
Her pretty glossy eyeshadow made me think she was tearing up the whole time.
Me too😂
@Error Report or high
She looks high, I thought she was crying too lol
Me too.
@@Hillary_camacho maybe that's it because although she expressed herself very well she seemed emotionless.
They really love each other but sometimes love is just not enough
True✌️
Preach.
Can I asked why? Sorry just really curious 😅🥺
@@pearl9237 you need dedication, commitment, decision, awareness on top of love
@@zouheratouadamou886 like that
When Elon spoke about the difference between someone having love FOR you and being in love WITH you... I felt that.
Right! She introduced me to a whole new concept
I think its really important to differentiate that and recognize it
nah that was some bullshit
@@radikalbeats sick bro
There are so many levels of love it’s crazy!
“This just wasn’t romantic love”
Girl I FELT that.
How are we all so afraid to say this
Yeh sometime your souls mate isn't ment to be your hubby or wife
It can't be romantic love, whatever that is suppose to mean, when the man wants to be with men too. Maybe that is apart of his depression and what he is battling. He needs to just let it go and be who he feels he is. She knows he loves her, and she loves him, but she knows they are best friends. Any man and woman that are so called best friends, but not together there is a reason or several reasons. And 1 reason is because he likes men like you do.
@@nadia4999 I feel like it was the she wanted a family and he didn’t more then anything
@@alissabee5923 She broke up with him because she knew he would not break up with her. He loves her, and she loves him, but it's like a dependent type of love, and not a love between two healthy individuals. She did the best thing for herself in a sense hoping it would force him to just come out with it, and be himself. But in his head he is afraid he will lose her totally, and he already knows he has disappointed her because he can't really give her what she wants. She needs to tell him she understands, and they will always be friends no matter what. She needs to find her a Man and keep it moving.
Oooh this felt familiar. “ I might’ve would’ve stayed longer but doesn’t mean it would have lasted”. Choose happiness. Choose purpose. Choose yourself.
I feel this SO hard.
❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️🙏🏽
Seems like she was the one to end the relationship.... extremely brave girl, that takes a tremendous amount of courage to walk away from someone you love so deeply for 9 years...
So if you loved them that deeply then why walk away? Lol did he beat her or cheat on her? If not her love was not that deep lol
@@infotech6075 Cultivating a healthy relationship is a lot more than just loving someone, and for whatever reason, she felt like she needed to end it, doesn't mean that she didn't love him though
@@loomonda18 Women are leaving men at a 80% rate in marriage. That's not called having courage that's called not bring dedicated enough to work through your issues. Like marriage, relationships are hardwork to maintain. By statistics, the problem with alot of women is when the hardwork part comes around they give up. I don't know their relationship history so I'm not going to go all the way in, but if she wasn't being beat or cheated on I find it hard to believe she loved him that deeply when she left, seriously.
@@infotech6075 she wanted a family & kids
@@infotech6075 It takes a lot more to have a functioning relationship that just to be madly in love, despite what Hollywood and Netflix tell you. Because at the end of the day you have to deal with life and if your core values and wishes don't align it's just better to walk away than to break trying to make something work that just won't.
She's a jewel. Any man will be blessed to have her in their lives. Protect her self awareness.
She’s so self-aware. It’s beautiful and inspiring to watch. I feel that these are very strong individuals. I wish them the best of luck
Better to stay friends, than bring kids in, and resent one another because one wanted a family and the other didn’t. If your core values don’t align, don’t force it. There are over a billion people on this planet, find someone else
7 to be exact
Couldn't agree more!
@@sonquatsch8585 7 people? Then I must already know everyone
@@pien9257 😂 my kind of comment
There’s billions of people in this planet but there isn’t someone for everyone.
I feel like it's going to be the one who got away vibes
💯
frrr
Well said. I feel like they’re both going to feel it
It already is based on his response of feeling regret once she starts a family with someone else. It’s beautiful that they were able to end things amicably, but that’s also the primary reason why it will be difficult to rid those feelings.
Definitely
“You feel like you have to lay on the bomb to protect everyone else but really we could’ve just thrown it out the house”. 🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯
#ICONIC
Explain please!!
I lowkey felt attacked when I read this
@@soph9060 he suppresses his feelings to keep everyone else in a good space or to keep the peace but she would rather him say whats on his mind so that they can work together to resolve the issue.
Powerful fact 😀😀... 😎
I'm glad she is strong in her decision & is very in tune with her feelings. He seems very confused, I hope he finds his way.
You heard “confused”? I thought he was also strong in his decision about not having children but was reconsidering marriage to her, as he was realizing how their dynamic may shift again and not support the friendship once she is married to someone else. “Doing the other side of life”. Either way I loved see young black people being so self aware and able to communicate, gives me hope
She is strong in her decision because she loves him. She knows she is not what he truly wants. He has not fully accepted who he is, and she seems to be waiting for him to stop battling within himself, and just admit that he is gay. He is confused, because he wants her in his life, but she is not being fulfilled in a way that maybe she believes a woman should feel for a man. She is not aroused or feel romantic vibes from him. I mean the purple hair is one clue. He is like her girlfriend, but he is a man, and thus her best friend, yet they are not together. She had no choice but to set him free.
@@nadia4999 he’s gay???
@@zenaisoffline862 I am not sure, but he comes off in this video as such. He might not even realize it himself, or maybe he does, and he is fighting it which is okay. Either way, the 1 female he loves broke up with him because she knows something is just off.
@@nadia4999 Yeah, I was kinda wondering if he was bi when he mentioned being unsure about bringing up certain sexual stuff.
Omg I need a part 2,3 & 4 of them! It feels like their story is still being written! Please let’s have them back like a year from now to see where they’re at!
To be honest, as deep as this seems, I could very much see her not communicating with him in a year because she is confused by his behavior and she realizes how much growing and personal reflection he needs to do before he can be what she wants and needs. Staying friends in a situation like that can be confusing, and kinda hurtful. Sometimes you just need to cut the ropes...
@@lovette7684 sometimes there are no ropes though. And they might be okay with floating yk?
I think he's gay & she knows it.
Please!!!!
@@rashadhaughton22 lmaoo how did you come to that conclusion????
This lady is emotionally intelligent ♥️
Yess she is
I love the fact that are mature enough to maintain their friendship after the romantic part of them ended. Their openness is refreshing. . . Elon was giving me Kerry Washington vibes.
He still wants to be with her. Just watching his facial expressions shows listening to what she's saying now is hitting different. It's stinging.
Absolutely.
Most men can’t handle failure or rejection. They still want any woman they can’t have
I thought it was bc he wasn’t interested in women... she’s the one that wishes it could last....he just doesn’t know what he wants exactly point proven @8:30......
I felt the same. He definitely wants her back.
@@opulence_prime I agree. I want someone I can’t have but I learned to accept it and move on. No matter how much it hurts
I don’t like that he asked the marriage q but I loved her answer. He doesn’t want her to give up on him but he’s not ready yet and she clearly needs more than he can offer her at that time.
I'm actually glad he did. He needed to know and understand how she feels about that option ever being there. He also needed to know that marriage doesn't mean forever, necessarily and know that it wouldn't fix the issues.
I feel like I'm watching myself right now. Two months ago I ended a 6 years relationship because he didn't believe in marriage, he didn't want to have kids, and we were planning on going to Canada together but in the end he said he didn't want to go. He was saying "yes" to everything because of the love he felt for me but he had different goals. He wants me back but what's the point if we don't agree on those things? The pain in my chest has been incredible, I've never cried this much in my life, but I have to stay true to myself and so does he. I hope we could see each other again some day and realize this was the best for both of us.
There’s a lot of us who understand what you’re feeling. It’s hard but you’re not alone.
I want to have kids and i want to go to Canada.
I hope and pray you stay strong. You deserve your hearts desires. Don’t look back on that relationship
Same here ❤️ sending much love
I had the same feeling! I went through this too! I ended my 6-year long relationship last September. It was SO hard to do and I still miss him, but I still feel it was the right decision, because just like the people in this video, I wanted more verbal affirmation/more affection in general, and I wanted children and he didn't. Also, we broke up for similar reasons once three years ago. Then we got back together and tried again, and we still couldn't compromise because finally, we just don't want the same things in life or the same kind of relationship. Soooooo nothing has changed except now I'm older. He's a great person, but it's just not a sustainable dynamic, and I know I deserve more. Your situation sounds similar. It sounds like he doesn't want the same things as you. I'm sure he had a ton of love for you, but sadly, it's true: sometimes love is not enough. From one person who went through this to another, sending you support and affirmation. You're right to stick to your guns and not get back with him if you know he's not going to be able to give you what you want. It's hard AF, but it sounds like it absolutely was the right decision. Sending all of the support!
I feel like he has alot of things he needs to workout within himself before he could love wholeheartedly.
I think he's bi or gay.
I don’t think he is...I think he is an empath and introvert. He is very careful about his words.
I think he may be confused a bit he said himself he was afraid to open up to her about his sexual preferences
@@soulfullygraced2521 I most def agree... but he could just mean some things he wanted to do/try in bed and maybe she didn’t want to🤷🏾♀️. Just trying to give him the benefit of the doubt here
@@bri3566 I feel you 😆
The bomb analogy she made was fantastic. I literally cried at how much I related to that.
Duuuuuuuude 🙆🏽♂️
She’s literally amazing
9:45
Sis has deep answers
I’m struggling so hard to learn how to communicate like this lady right here. I appreciate her clarity in expressing herself without attacking or self pity. God bless her. I wish this guy well too. He is trying and that’s beautiful
Woah they're so much in sync with each other. Their smiles, movements, hair dye, etc
@hair dye 😆😆😂😂😂😂idk why that made me laugh
Facial features as well
I envy the way she articulates her emotions.
She's more mature and knows exactly what she wants, my brother is a bit indecisive and might need some more personal growth
Really good summary :)
I am mesmerized by her way of communicating. She needs to create a curriculum for an AP Conversation class. Or teach Advanced Level Dialogue 101. Ma'am! 🎓🎓
Amen, first sentence and I felt like I don’t know how to speak English
What? Why is everyone saying this? Really don’t get it
@@shellcharles3633 I think the same thing. She used a lot of big words that made her sound more articulated however she wasn’t really saying anything. She also was telling him a lot of how HE was feeling which is not good communication to tell someone else what THEY feel.
However I do think she has high emotional maturity for sure
I would attend😭😭😭 bc I struggle with communicating
OMGosh...I adore her!!! She'd be a bomb therapist. She deserves someone capable of loving her as deeply and richly as she loves them. Best wishes to them both.
They really do love one another. I can especially see it in his eyes and in the way that he expresses himself to her. There is nothing more wonderful in this life than love. I hope that they give love another try when they get older and more mature.
@Infinity 369 @Infinity 369 He is. He seems to have some commitment and abandonment issues. I think that she loves him, but those issues made her bow out of loving him the way that she used to. I was once in love with someone who was emotionally unavailable, and once I learned that I could never have that person the way that I truly wanted and needed them I knew that I had to make a conscious decision to move on with my life. We just weren't meant to be. And that's okay. We live and we learn. These two are still really young, and I hope that they don't let time slip away then look back with regrets.
You can be in love with someone, but unfortunately that is not always “the one”. Sometimes the one you loved and didn’t end up with makes you learn your biggest lesson in life.
@@sydneymichelle8357 That is so true! I'm so grateful that he and I met, and I learned a lot about myself in the short time that we spent together. I wouldn't take it back even if I could, but I can't lie and say that being in love alone while with him wasn't one of the hardest things I've ever experienced. I love him still, but I've finally come to accept that we just weren't meant to be.
I hope that these two mature and experience life but while going down separate paths they understand that the love they have is rare, and it should never be taken for granted.
Me too. Although she articulated her emotions, I felt she didn't show any emotions. She seemed very cold to me.
I hope the same
Its called growing up and growing apart. He is wearing an emotional mask, and has fear of vulnerability and abandonment, which can create a soul tie of codependency, and she may have expressed this through her anxiety.
you are so intelligent wow! you learn somethin new everyday, thank you for this comment
Wow this comment perfectly described my relationships. Le sigh.
Well read and we’ll said. ❤️
They are so self-aware and introspective and there is so much love between them. 10:30 “The eyes, Chico! They never lie”. This video gave me all the feels!
It was pure love standing still..
It's fascinating how much chemistry they have, but how small misalignments prevented them from maximizing on the connection.
wow, she is amazing at articulating herself and understanding him without retorting to any negativity, that is great talent. Wish them both the best in life!
That was VERY intense. I feel like I couldn't even breathe listening to them...really her. That's somebody who has worked on herself and know exactly who she is. And same for the dude, but....just...wow.
This feels so familiar. She’s sitting there with her teenage love trying to talk to him about what went wrong and while she grown up and she knows what she wants he’s still that teenage boy and he still has a lot of growing up to do. The love is still there, and it might not even happen with anyone else in the way that it was there before, but she has to move on for her life and her futures sake. Because she can’t just keep waiting for him to finally grow up and be able to communicate and work towards what she wants in life.
Same tale different people
That timetable can be treacherous, I suggest young women beware, now in my 40's I can tell you most of my women friends are disappointed in letting go of those young loves looking for the guy who was more mature, more established, etc..... Life is long, forever is even longer, so if you plan on being with someone forever why not give it the time it deserves?
@@quincyhyde8760 what?
@@quincyhyde8760 Imagine suggesting to a man or woman to take a 50/50 on very, serious non-negotiables. "Childhood best friends with no communication skills in the relationship, and still struggling through that now + one partner wants to get married and the other doesn't want kids and doesn't see the point in marriage."
The emotional intelligence is through the roof! I would love to converse with someone who is open with their emotions, and is accepting of mines.
I’m going through my first break up in an adult relationship and it’s so life changing and hard. This video helped me, though. I feel not alone in the pain and complexity that is relationships and heart break. We also ended it on good terms, just needed different things
Same. My 1st bf ever. I can’t stop crying and wondering if I made a mistake
Time truly heals ladies. I’ve wiped many tears. And it sounds so cliche but... you are enough. Once you truly learn that and love yourself, real unconditional love will come because you wont even tolerate anything less. And if it doesn’t you’ll still be fine. I’m married now for 10 years but break ups were trying especially because I wanted to be in a loving relationship so bad but that thought process was so toxic and I’m sure I was giving off desperado vibes even though I tried not to. Moral is this will strengthen you. Think of it as an emotional workout
@@mrs.harris933 thank you for the empowering words. I already knew I have a lot to heal and to truly learn self love, and I know this is just a part of that process. Sending you good vibes back!
Am excited for her- an absolute gem- to fully unhook from this connection and find the love she deserves: freely given, deep, clear and true.
hello do you need help on how to get your ex back or restore someone you love
there is a love specialist who helped me get my ex back after 2years of divorce
Why are people shocked that they can and do speak with depth and honesty. I readily admit that the average couple never attain this level of communication together, but 1) their both intelligent with a vocabulary 2) she's undergone specific therapy to address and attack her anxieties 3) they have a friendship that spans the majority of their lives on earth.
I think people are just admiring it. No one seems too shocked
I think because of the black stereotypes that heavily push in tv and in movies.
He seems like he has an avoidant personality type. He is afraid of being abandoned, so he pulls away, he doesn't show himself fully, he won't commit fully (marriage etc)
Not everyone is meant to be married.
Yes! I get avoidant personality type as well from him
thought the same
Man if that isn’t me. It’s a defense mechanism and it not only isn’t fair to your partner but you also end up missing out on vulnerable connections and it sucks. I am starting therapy soon.
@A T Bingo!!!
This is making me sad. They really love each other!
Agreed
@Infinity 369 I think it was because she wants a family and marriage and he didn't
I agree!
@@shonb989 yeah and I feel like when he said that he was probably young and didn’t mean that way
You can but baby girl is over the bullshit and it's obvious. Leaving someone you love hurts so much and it takes a special kind of courage to accept that it was best for both of you.
I hate that it's so common for men to feel this way. Being afraid to freely express themselves without fear of judgement or abandonment. I wish men were given better tools for communication and intimacy. Society truly has failed men as a whole.
I feel this 💔
this hit different
Thankfully as a gay man who was given the ability to express my self as a adult to my family, friendship and failed and ongoing intimate relationships. I got the tools to express my intimate side of myself without feeling judge or abandoned.
@@TP-xy2ms that's seriously something to be very proud of! Not many can say that
Patriarchal society fails men, too.
A lot of these comments are concerning because it seems like y'all either fell for the proposal line or his lovesick gaze. Her response was PERFECT. Hypothetical or not, to flip from not wanting marriage & kids to proposing on her way out is incredibly manipulative. I'm so glad she shook off the shock he was hoping for and kept her mind clear.
This seems like it's even a draining friendship since she's shouldering the bulk of the emotional intelligence, communication while he's still clearly pining. I hope they consider trying to detach - BEST friend exes are just a mess anyway. 💜
I agree
Agreed!
This was an interesting take on the conversation, I didn't realize this until you said it. I also feel like perhaps he didn't mean to be manipulative and is still just pining after her, I feel like he asked that honestly without ill intent (even though it's still manipulative at face value - but maybe he didn't recognize that - I also could just be naive lol!)
I’m glad I wasn’t the only one who caught that.
@@iRockU96 No, you're absolutely right! I didn't want to make my comment too long 🥴, but was going to get into how not all manipulation is malicious or even intentional. A lot of us play mind games daily without realizing it. So he may have been genuine to some degree about wondering how she would have answered back then, but his facial expressions during her reply also gave me "it was worth a shot" vibes 😂
She is very mature but holding onto this situation so closely has too much backfire potential and she already said it gives new partners pause. Mentioning she felt safe with him also sounds more like familiarity. This only ends okay if he first starts to work through his reasoning for having a negative opinion of family *AND* starts to reach her level to share the emotional load. 🤷🏿♀️
Her emotional communication is incredible
This is the best Skin Deep video so far. What a fantastic and mature conversation they shared, I feel like I grew as I listened to them speak!
reminds me of my own. No communication and always worried/scared of being misunderstood. The past sure leaves no room to be vulnerable
She’s beautiful! She almost looks like a blend Rapsody and Kerry Washington! 🥰
Bam...u hit it on da head on dat 1. I mos def see rapsody.
That last question seems manipulative because you can tell that she created a safe space for him and she comes off as a wholesome young woman.
Oh my gosh, you two seem both still so in love. If you look up attachment styles, my guess is that he is an avoidant type. My husband and I dealt with this (I was fearful-anxious type). The only way to fix it is to go to therapy (not forever), but just long enough to understand each other. He probably longs for the relationship, but also feels more comfortable with the distance in this friendship form, while she wanted more and that's why they couldn't make it work. The kids thing is important too, and could be a reason to not be together, but his lack of desire for kids might also be attached to his distancing attachment style. Hope he explores this and they can possibly give this a shot before it is too late. I could be totally wrong here, but that was just my impression. I wish them both luck! They both have beautiful hearts!
true
you could see the confusion and frustration that formed when she thought he meant that he was going to propose, because that was what seemed to be a key part in why they broke up, then she realized he asked "what if I was going to"
wow, they love each other so much. it's all in the eyes
The way she spoke flowed poetically and precisely
She seems to have such a calm genuine soul. Very rare to come across women like that. I could definitely see why a man would be hung up over her. Obviously I don’t know the ins and outs of the relationship but she seems super dope.
I admire her. She aspires to follow her own dreams and knows that both not sharing those dreams completely, that it was time to depart, but they both do seem better as friends. It’s sad it took almost a decade but i do see why because they were so young at 19 and i feel like he is unsure of what he truly wants, most likely acts out of fear from reaching a point of anxiety which is why he mentioned The Marriage question, he didnt want to lose her to prevent the mental damage in himself and she had the perfect answer to his question.
Wow it's how she expresses herself so succinctly for me . What a great mind ..the kids are alright y'all
This is my third time coming back to watch this video. I want to learn so much from this majestic woman ✨
God saved me from depression, anxiety, and so much more. And he can help you too just talk to him freely.
Amen🔥✝️❤️🙏🏽
I struggled from this alot, God has been helping really, grateful for him
Amen
The fact that there's is no music in the background makes the emotions more intense.
This is a beautiful, open, and honest conversation. It’s clear they know and deeply care for each other. I hope they can both have closure. She seems to have a clear vision of what she wants and needs. Bless them both. ❤️
When I saw the compilation I knew I haven't seen this couple. Wow, so strong the connection
A beautiful conversation.....filled with a warm sense of care for each other
Love how she was able to communicate with him. Glad to see there's still a ton of love and mutual respect between the two of them
Woah, the love is so palpable. I have no words
Man!! This totally broke my heart. So much love. I can relate. 💔
I think she seems so psychologically astute and mature and that he's a little young for her. Not ready or interested in getting married, but "What if I'd have asked you?". What the hell! I think a lot of men are not interested in the committment but don't want a woman to move on to someone who is. It's like they want to reserve her (string her along). I'm sure this could go both ways too with women not wanting the commitment.
I felt the same here - not wanting to let her go completely
The calmness between the two of them is such a beautiful example of maturity.
She is an awesome communicator, she is very true to herself. She is amazing.
Whoa! this was so good, they look young, however im 35 and I felt this!.. She answered very articulate. I commend them for this !! I just recently went through a relationship and we cut it off and I feel as though im looking in a mirror. However the guy wanted children etc and I dont. My main reason for letting it go was because of Lewis "Biggest Fear" this was very powerful
Do you eventually want marriage and kids? Maybe later on down the road? Or are you not interested at all?
@@jessicamcdaniels2337 Marriage, 100%...I have children and he doesnt. I know I don't want anymore...and i cant block him from that blessing. I love and respect him to much.
The Mckinsons here.....
We are early!!! It is sooo refreshing to see young people communicating so effectively. Great to see as we often leave relationships with no closure but having closure is the best. He really does adore her, look how he looks at her!!!
I knew he was going to respond that way to the question "What is your biggest fear about the next stage of our relationship?"
it looks like the gem cried before shooting the video ❤️😔 stay strong guys❤️
I feel so much pain & history between them. Yet, love at the same time. It made me cry.
I could listen to her for hours .... wow
They both look teary eyed. A lot of love & hurt. Sounds like he was playing games with this Queen & left her no choice but to leave him.
holy f*ck
I could not. It would hurt too much to stay friends and dream about the "what ifs"?
Communication ,love,adventure,ability to push each other reach higher levels ,being friends is really important to have a successful relationship
She is definitely a psychologist at heart. Taking into consideration the reasoning behind a person's behavior as opposed to taking offense. She is wise beyond her years and so articulate. She needs someone a little older perhaps. She ahead of her age.
This is really still my favorite video. I have always wanted to communicate with someone that just knows how to put their feelings into words
I love their combined energy and they’re two beautiful people. They look good together.
These videos make me so emotional like I’m them 😭😭 but these videos are so healing ❤️🩹
She is one smart cookie! Very articulate.
Her level of communication is amazing!!
Are we going to ignore how cute he is ?
Thank you for all the likes! Subscribe to my channel!
Lol I was thinking the same. He is so cute
right! i was thinking the same like this joka is beautiful
yeah he’s so handsome i love his hair!!
Eh
nah we ain't ignoring that
His answer to the first question was so beautiful
are we gonna shut up and not acknowledge how beautiful he is?
That’s what I was thinking 😭😭😍😍
YAS. was looking for this comment.
Now im pregnant. Im a guy.
@A T my gaydar was through the roooooooooof but I’ve learnt to retract myself from imposing sexuality to people tho.. maybe it’s just his prettiness that his blindsiding but dang
@@funnygay Thank you for that.
I thought he was gay and afraid to come out
And here we have a young Big Sean and a young Rapsody.....on a serious note, this Is a really great dialogue their having, great display of listening and understanding.
Their relationship seems so good together, sucks when it doesn’t work how you want it to. At least they are able to continue being good friends. Whatever they have, it’s beautiful.
I have this game for long term couples and it’s so amazing my bf and I have been together for 4 years and I feel like it’s really hard for him to communicate his feelings and emotions and this game has helped him open up and we both reallly enjoy it everytime we play I feel really close to him we rediscover what sometimes u forget when ur w someone for or things we take for granted or haven’t thought about. I cry almost everytime cuz I get so happy.
Desiree, we're so glad you've enjoyed the game. Much love.
They should stay friends and not be in a relationship. Long term they have core issues that are not resolvable without someone living a life they don’t want. Their relationship has to be reestablished in order to maintain friendship with their future spouses otherwise it’s going to be a jealous mess. When he described his biggest fear it seemed like he’s not going to be ok with her moving on and being happy. That’s definitely a red flag but the fact they were able to communicate all of this is amazing
I feel for my brother right there. I see where he's coming and probably feel the same feeling he's feeling
She favors Kerry Washington 💕
This was great. She is incredibly thoughtful and well-spoken.
They are both gorgeous.
This was fantastic. I don't know how I fell on your video but I'm glad I did.
Elon is extraordinary. Her awareness is authentic and insightful. Wow ❤️
I hope I’m not the only one who bursted into tears @10:34
They are so meant to be it’s crazy- make it work - don’t let fear keep you apart. Follow your gut, follow that spark... follow that peace.
Omgosh she is so articulate, he was not ready for her but that's ok because I don't feel like they should have been together, if anything it was comfortable and familiar for them to couple up. It seems as if he is afraid to harm her with whatever he is holding back.
They're both good looking, intelligent, well spoken young ppl. I wish them both well.