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As a person with severe autism, no matter how hard I try to change myself because being myself pushes people away, the best version of myself is still so socially awkward that I can’t get a date after 8 years of trying.
That's why I prefer the saying "Be the BEST version of yourself". Everyone has flaws so we should be willing to improve ourselves if we expect to achieve greater things.
Agree Alvin: --well-meaning people may not express their intention as you did. Antonio's advice is good: envision a personal ideal and work toward it. Then each step is FORWARD!
Originality is nice but if there will always room for improvement. Everyone deserves improvement in their life. Encouraging people to be themselves might make them complacent
Sitting at this bench and the background, gives me a feeling that Antonio is some kind of father to us, who tries to give us some advices and lessons for life. I’m 21 years old and my father haven’t teach me a lot, so I appreciate your content because you give some of your younger viewers the feeling of someone we lack of. I always loved your content, Mr Antonio Centeno! Keep it going!
"Being myself" in my life has never taken me anywhere. However, admitting to myself that i can be better and I can do better has led me to bettering myself and realizing I deserve better than I was getting. It was only after realizing I didn't have to be myself was I able to get out of a toxic relationship and change just about every aspect of myself for the better. Now, I get treated better and I get noticed. To be honest, being myself didn't feel very good.. Being who I am now, feels amazing. GO Navy!
YES. This is something I've been thinking about for a long time, we are constantly being told to be ourselves, be happy with who we are, that we are amazing whoever we are, that bs. That will not make anyone happy. The only way to be happier is to not be set in your ways and constantly look for things to improve; physically, mentally, spiritually, financially... I'm so glad someone with a platform is sending this important message out, more people should, just to counterbalance the overwhelming ammount of toxic self acceptance present in popular culture.
Being myself has actually gotten me into more trouble than being "the best version of myself" at that moment. So I'm now trying my best to figure out what I really want to do. Especially now that I've just graduated uni.
Being yourself means being who you are vs trying to be someone who you are not! It doesn’t mean you don’t improve, or try to become the best version of yourself. In fact, being yourself helps you understand where you are, and where you want to be. In this transactional world, it is quite difficult to even understand your own self. We almost, always try to be who we think we are ( based on what people make us believe) rather than actually being who we really are.
The things that you do and do not do are far more important than you think. It is not only my fate that depends on whether I get my act together and live out my genuine being, but it is also everyone that I am networked with. Be afraid of pursuing something meaningful, but be more afraid of standing still.
Just being yourself isn't a key. I studied in an awful public school in the criminal neighborhood in small Russian town but I always knew that I can become a better person. I studied really hard and did sports regularly to achieve my goals. Thanks to my friends who are constantly motivating me, nowadays I'm studying for finance in Moscow, I talk to interesting people from international financial companies, I learn more every day and guess what? I'll NEVER say to my friends "just being yourself" because they want to be successful in life and they know that we have to deal with our problems to do so. Thanks for your content, Antonio, nowadays more people appreciate my style and even ask for advice!
Love this video, I’m a 15 year old! People did tell me “be yourself”. And I try to be myself but I do want to learn new thing and change myself. Few years ago I had no knowledge about fashion and now I changed and I like fashion! Thanks for the information!❤️
I always thought "be yourself" and "finding yourself" were complete bs. You are never "yourself" you are just a reflection of your experiences, yet, you already are "yourself," as you do all sort of stuff that you decide to do etc.
I don't know Antonio personally and I might never meet him in real life but watching him talking outside his house on bench I feel I'm sitting right to him, It feels like an Uncle-Nephew bond. All of this advice is so complete that it covers all the potential questions that I might've had if I was actually sitting right next to him. Why do I feel so connected with a person I don't even know? Being a part of this UA-cam community of his for 3 years now, he had me thinking about a lot of actions of mine, how I might affect people, how I can grow as a person, *HOW TO BE THE BEST VERSION OF MYSELF* In the end, it concludes to the fact that life just doesn't revolve around you, do no harm to others, treat other people like you want them to treat you, some amendments here & there in your personality & character is a good thing to do after all life's to short and you don't wanna spend it with hating others for little things, being all Stubborn. Your personality changes over time, people change sometimes for good & sometimes for not so good. Don't keep your ego above your relationships, the only thing that everybody will ever want from you is getting treated with respect, so spread some love, the world really needs it right now. And there's a big difference in just being yourself and being bad as a person, you are! evolving every single day so stop blaming it your personality and be responsible for your actions. ☮️
Hey Antonio, hard to swallow but good advice indeed! We tend to often revert to our worst selves when we don't keep ourselves in check! Being open minded and always learning to improve yourself each step of the way is a tough and conscious decision. Being a gentleman is a continuous effort and state of mind :) Cheers!
This is definitely a new opinion to me. I’ve never heard anyone speak about “being yourself” with this argument against it. Very informative, and nice to hear some new stuff!
Antonio, this was a fantastic, thoughtful, and obviously heartfelt video. I appreciate your reflections on humble beginnings and dealings with prejudice. I am an African American man of 51 years who-despite many advantages conferred by an upper middle-class upbringing and a good education-has had to encounter, adapt to, and overcome discrimination and a host of other personal challenges. This is life. When I wanted to illustrate to and instill in my daughter some of the virtues of our heritage, I explained to her the importance of strength in adversity and perseverance. I am grateful that you touch on these themes here, because they are critically important and beneficial to everyone. We are not defined by our present circumstances. If we are down, we can stand up, and once we stand, we can begin to climb. We can do neither without the intention and the effort to change. Thank you for making this simple truth so abundantly clear in this presentation.
I always hear the same mantra "just be yourself." Always dream about be myself. I always motivate me to be myself. Always think about I want to do this and that. But after watching Antonio's video I realized that what I'm doing is not trying to be myself. What I'm trying to do is thinking about the ways to improve myself. Trying to be the best version of you isn't being yourself. It is improving yourself. I learned it from Antonio today. Great content. Thanks for guiding us from darkness to light.
I'm already 65% on track where improving myself counts, currently working on the next big step... doing this is quite fun & i hope its also fun for everyone!
That's why I keep a few friends around me that are blunt. A lot of people see them as assholes. I value their opinions. It tends to be the "asshole" friends that will give you the truth and will debate with you about all sorts of topics. Including self improvement.
Antonio, I sent this to my 18 year old son, Alec who is entering his first year of college and is learning how to navigate the social world on his own now. I come from a similar disadvantaged background. (Hispanic but from the impoverished South Bronx) Its important for him to hear and see these principles from others besides me, so thank you.
Man, great video! To succeed in life, and to become the best version of yourself, you must not see who you're as something fixed You need to always be open to learn from experiences, and develop accordingly Remember that every day we face more and more challenges, and this puts you in front of two options You either become the victim of the challenge, or its student and learn from it how to become better Be strong, and good luck to all of you gentlemen
This is a really great video. People must learn to take accountability for theirselves. I also believe that a true friend doesn't care if he is hated but tell the truth rather than being liked and tells lies. I pride myself on being honest but also give constructive criticism to help people grow. I really appreciate your videos ❤️
I think the helpful version of this is to advise someone to be "authentic". Don't try to be someone you aren't, and don't try to fit someone else's idea of what you should be. Become the man you know yourself to be, and then be that. Be the best version of yourself you can, naturally and authentically. Great video, Antonio. These days, your best videos have nothing to do with apparel and accessories. You're adding way more value teaching us how to be the men we know ourselves to be.
I was told growing up to "be yourself, but always be your better self". About being a self made man. I've had some great influences and help along the way, however the choices (both good and bad) were mine to make. I know that may sound arrogant, but it's really quite humbling. Thanks for the videos Antonio!
Hey Antonio! I'm a huge RMRS point and I've learnt so much from you. However, I don't agree that "just be yourself" is bad advice. I understand how "being yourself" can be interpreted as being complacent. Nevertheless, I don't believe that being complacent and indolent is the message that people are trying to send when they give that advice. After reading "The Inner Game" books published by Timothy Gallwey, I have a better understanding of the true meaning of "being yourself". The Inner Game was founded on the tennis courts. While Gallwey was coaching, he saw a continuous dialogue going on in his student's mind: "Bend your knees..meet your racquet in front of you...you clumsy ox, your grandmother could play better". Gallwey called this voice Self 1. Self 1 can hinder our performance on the tennis courts, but it's detrimental effects are much worse away from the tennis courts. It's constantly either making us feel inferior or superior to others. My Self 1 always tries to convince me that I'm not good enough and tells me to should give up. However, when we strip away all the concepts created by self one, we can discover our true selves - Self 2. Self 2 has the ability to have courage and strength and to love and to be kind. Self 2 has a natural thirst to learn, to excel, to admire and to enjoy. It can learn to be aware of it's mistakes and to learn from them. I think it's crucial that we constantly challenge ourselves and to strive to be better people everyday. However, I think embracing our individuality and finding our own individual purpose in life is the best way to maximise our potential.
Fantastic video Antonio! I usually like your videos, but I love this one. It really resonated with me. Self improvement was always part of my life and still is. In contrast to your friend I never had problems with others. All at the expense of having immense troubles with myself. Would I have just been myself, I think I would already be no more. But the hope of a brighter future is what motivated me to constantly work on myself. Shout out to everyone struggling with mental difficulties. Don't brush it off, take your time with it and allow it to heal. Seek professional Help. Someone else's thoughts on my problems really helped me progress.
There are so many great messages in this video and in the comments ts so far. Years ago I was having trouble at work and my boss took me aside to see what was going on. He told me that whenever he saw things like this going on it was almost always because of something at home. I realised that my work-life balance was way off and that I was trying to be everything to everyone at once, reasoning that "it's just the way I am". I took stock and eventually had a career change and a family... all because of that conversation and the realisation that I was using "being myself" as an excuse, like a shield to hide behind. I'm still being myself, just a better version.
Trying to imrove oneself is in itself a tremendous reward. All you need is a clear goal and a plan to get there. "We cannot live better than in seeking to become better" - Socrates "If a man knows not to which port he sails, no wind is favourable" - Seneca
This is an excellent video, very useful. In the mid 1990s I was in my 30s and I was always in a bad mood at work. One day a female intern came up to me and confronted me about it. I was startled over her blunt honesty, but I worked on improving myself. After that coworkers became more comfortable with me. I still have to keep an eye on my mood, but I’m grateful to that intern for setting me straight.
I love how there is that extra bit of depth to the stuff you say. I came for the style advice and stayed for the life lessons. Thank you and all the best from Vienna, Austria!
The key is self accountability. One can never improve until they learn to hold themselves accountable for who and where they are in the present. Too many people focus the blame outwards.
I will put this as simple as possible " Thank you very much for this video". I was having a difficult time and somewhere in there, you helped somehow. So, thank you.
You can only truly be yourself and love yourself after you have worked on yourself and what do I mean by that? By getting rid of bad habits slowing you down, learning new skills, getting fit, getting more life experience and interacting with people. Without working on yourself, self love is just a band aid.
Very true. The "you can't judge me 'cos you don't know my story" brigade produces nothing more than toxic advice. We all have flaws, and no matter who we are, we can always make ourselves better.
A big thing us men need to remember is that improvement can also take time. When we first identify the problem or struggle, not only do we need to make a game plan (and change it when necessary), but also remain consistent. There are certain things in my life I know that it took years for me to improve since they were such an impact on my life. Changing habits and behavior, will take time and consistency and that’s something that definitely needs to be remembered or we can fall into the trap of that phrase “be yourself”.
This boils down to the importance I try influence my friends to practice; at the start and end of everyday take a little time to reflect on yourself, how you feel how you interact and compare it to what you want to feel. Each honest moment will help you become a better, well... You. Some people tend to shy away from meditation because it is, "too involving"; simply take a second before getting out of bed every morning, don't reach for your phone or check the time, just let your mind wander and find the peace that you would like to carry throughout the day.
I grew up as a young man with divorced parents, smokers, and constant trips to doctors to discover why I am so short (I have a mild form of dwarfism). I was told by several teachers and other adults I just was going to be able to be much because of all my "disadvantages". While I struggled for several years. I got married (25 years and counting) we have 3 great kids, moved through several industries, became a pastor, got my bachelors degree in business administration (at 46), and recently moved into a new job in Ohio (1400 miles from my home town in Wyoming) and bought a house. I state all of this not because I am a great person or to brag, but because I truly believe, no matter what your position in life or the cards you are dealt, you can always move forward. The choice is up to each of us. We can be defined by our circumstances or we can define them ourselves as we grow, develop, and change. Now I am preparing to attack my next challenge, a master's degree in management and leadership. Antonio, knowing a little about your background is inspiring as well. As I said, our circumstances do not define us, we can choose to define our lives in spite of, or through our circumstances. We can choose to stay put consumed by these experiences or we can choose to better our lives and those around us day by day. My motto, "Keep Moving Forward!"
It's truly is amazing how a well fit suit and a lot of tweaking to your social skills and your personality, you can become a beacon of hope and light for someone, and it's all thanks to you Mr. Centeno, you have helped me to grow more into the man I want and need to be, and I've started collage to be a E.M.T. and I'm gonna be getting a job soon. Thank you Mr. Centeno for all that you do for all of us.
saying "be yourself" is the easy way to level up your confidence, but indeed, can cause too many troubles, others say "be the best version of yourself" but how can you achieve that if dont know what to improve??, psychologist Jordan Peterson described a few points that could help in those aspect like "Pursue what is meaningful (not what is expedient)", "Make friends with people who want the best for you" "Tell the truth-or, at least, don’t lie" and of course "Treat yourself like someone you are responsible for helping" (there are many other topics too), working on this aspects it can help to transform anybody into a more conscious and better person.
Well said Antonio!👍🏻 I think “be yourself” though well intentioned becomes especially unhelpful if I don’t truly know who I am. I also believe that when we most fully and accurately know God we most fully and accurately know ourselves because we are God’s self portrait.
Antonio just being Antonio - telling it how it is. The 6 months we've worked together helped me a lot in growing as a person, simply because of you and the team being who you are, but in a good way, not like your friend. Which is why I'm always happy to see you put out a video od this type out - there's a lot of knowledge to consume! Also the coins are amazing!
Truly helpful video. Like to watch that kind. Someone said in the comments "Be the best version of yourself" and that statement can sumerize all the talking and even that video. Thank you Antonio
Okay, Captain, This is one of your best videos. I'm glad you show others the struggles you went through. On a side note, I'm still waiting for you to do a video at the Marine Corps Museum in Quantico. Although I'm a retired Army Officer, I think it is a great display of the Corps' history. Semper Fi!!
Be the man you know yourself to be! I like that. And it may even take some time as well. It doesn’t just happen overnight. It’s a process and it’s never too late. You decide who you are and don’t ever let mistakes of your past hold you back from being better.
I spent my first 20 years of my life thinking I knew it all, and the next 20 apologizing for it. I felt I finally had the wisdom to realize all I didn’t know, and the good sense not to make sure everyone else knew it. There’s a different perspective you gain when you care more about the relationship, and not about the championship. I’m just sorry it took me so long to learn. But happy I did.
Hi Antonio, right now I'm trying to help a guy who asked me for help with girls. I told him that he must not change his passions and who he is, but only present everything in a better way, valuing his strengths and putting his weaknesses in the background. You have to be the best version of yourself, but also present that version to your best.
This video came at the perfect time. Lately I've been trying to level up and pick up better habits. This channel really does help, as well as a few books I've been reading like the four agreements and becoming supernatural. The only limit is yourself. My dad always told me you can do anything you set your mind too. As people it's good to always be growing and improving. Be better today than you were yesterday. It's hard at first but it's not impossible. The payout is much more rewarding than you could ever imagine.
This really is one of your best videos you have made! And one of the most meaningful and important ones. (Also kudos to your editor for helping to keep it feeling light and fun even though the topic is quite deep)
As a kid I hated the fact teachers and adults said to me 'Just be yourself'. It worked the opposite way for me - I'm pretty extroverted - I always liked to entertain people and it almost felt like a way of putting me down "Kiddo, just be yourself you don't have to entertain people." Now, about 10 years later, I had some girls rejecting me and I started to blame myself for it. During the lockdown I picked up a new hobby reading books! I read the book '12 rules for life an antidote to chaos' by Jordan B Peterson. This book changed my perspective on being myself. It changed my way of thinking to 'be the best version of yourself'. If you are struggling with these kind of topics I suggest reading it. It changed me :D
Same here, raised by a single mom, never had a relationship with my father, (other then the night he left his DNA in her). She collected welfare, and was an alcoholic. I found my way into the Navy, then built upon that after reentering the civilian world. I got into management and had a very successful career. I'm now retired, and enjoying my life, still learning new things and putting in the work to be the best version of myself. Especially learning the finer points of men's fashion.
Awesome topic! Specially now that i been reading into Stoicism. we were given two ears and one mouth for a reason: to listen more than we talk. And since we have two eyes, we are obligated to read and observe more than we talk as well
Humility is what truly every man needs every now and then. We need to improve ourselves constantly, because this world is constantly changing. If I'm gonna give an advice of ''Be yourself'' I usually give it in the dating situations. Lots of men try too hard for this stuff and show a persona which is not them. And then they get what they want and curtains fall off, that usually results in a broken relationship and sad people. Do not hide your true colors. I use myself as an example. If you look at me from outside/from socials yeah I'm always working, traveling, taking photos, trying new things but inside I'm just a guy who loves anime and sci-fi movies/series, who goes out sometimes to do different stuff. And in the beginning of the dates, usually this turns people off because they have created their expectations for me. Be yourself is the working advice here. But in life, you need to better yourself in every aspect, so when you spend time alone, you feel proud of yourself. If you don't, you will just feel regret; or you will be ignorant, which is double bad.
Sitting here at work on a different continent and all I can say is "truer words haven't been spoken", we are constantly changing and evolving or devolving dependant on what we tell ourselves and what we surround ourselves around. Think of the age old saying "show me your five best friends and I'll show you the next five years of your life. I, myself, took 5 months of my life and left my entire world and immersed myself in an entirely different culture and broadened my view as well as found areas of my life which I could improve on. Point is, we can all be ourselves, but the core question should actually be "Is the person you are right now going to move you forward, keep you stagnant or bring you down?"
Great advice Antonio! I hate wearing suits, but I always get compliments when I wear one. I'm definitely not "being myself" when I wear one, but life is about results, not how I feel.
There's always room for improvement. Staying yourself will keep you stagnant. For example, I'm currently working as a school janitor. If I be myself, I'll forever stay at a position like that. Instead, I'm working at improving myself and upgrading so I can go back to school for a degree in environmental science. Thus, I need to be someone else to change into the person I want to be. As you mentioned at the end of the video, being authentic to yourself is better advice than being yourself. That way you can always grow as a person.
The common thread is always to be your BEST self. Basically who do you admire most, identify why you admire them, and try to improve in developing the qualities you admired.
In my opinion almost everything comes down to choice. You choose to believe that you can't change because it's easier. I really hate it when someone sais once a cheater always a cheater or if he served a sentence thats it that person will be a criminal his whole life. There are a lot of people that think like that and it is just false because that person has seen the consequences of his actions and he is more likely not to do them again. The point is that "being yourself" is choosing a life style or an action you can change or improve.
“Be the best version of yourself” is slightly better than “be yourself”, but not by much. It’s not like you can wake up each day and choose to be a great person, as if you were choosing what to wear from your closet. Building character takes time and dedication, and it’s a sliding scale from bad to good. You have to work towards it, you can’t just “will” it to happen.
I greatly appreciate these videos. I am def a “it’s who I am man” and have been trying to change that. This video is a great way to help me improve on that and pass on some help to my friends that fall into the same trap.
Awesome editing and really good subject! Please keep them coming Salutations from Mexico Ps your porch looks incredible as a Mexican that has lived all his life here, I love the architecture of US houses like that
Antonio, I have been following you for three years now, and I am truly impressed with the level and the depth of content you deliver. This type of self image talks is really something we really need, esprcially in rough times such as these.
Thanks for this video, Antonio! I've always had a problem with the idea of "Just be yourself" but didn't know how to explain it until now. I much prefer "Be the best possible version of yourself".
I wholehearted agree with you,, Antonio. I have not listened to the "be yourself" advice since I was in high school, because at the time, I was still trying to figure out who I wanted to be as a person and what I wanted to do in life. Fast forward to now, I am a completely different and better person I was just 4 years ago. What I say is don't be yourself, but find a person or group of people you aspire to be like, and work towards living in their lifestyle professionally, personally, and physically. It takes years to become the person you aspire to be, whether that is wanting to become a lawyer or being the best body builder at the gym. Growing a family or becoming a successful business owner, and along the way, you will figure out that there is something else that you can do to improve yourself, so therefore it truly takes a lifetime to become the best you know yourself to be and it is the journey to get there that defines us individually. Edit: I go for a walk a few times a week at the park and sit at a park bench to get some fresh air and be able to really think. A forward thinker like me is always thinking about how to do something to make tomorrow a day of success. I went to a brief a few weeks ago and the presenter said something I will never forget. "Today will be the worst day of your professional life because you will come back to your job tomorrow and use something you learned today to make a better tomorrow."
In my opinion the only way to be happy in this life is by accomplishing something. This is why successful people and people that you recognize as always being happy are so goal oriented, not only that, but they are always actively doing something to improve themselves. Be yourself? No. Be true to your morals and beliefs, but never stop refining yourself and becoming a better version of yourself. This is why I struggle with the idea of the self love/body movement that is going on right now. Loving yourself and loving your body doesn't mean that you should be okay with being overweight and unhealthy... if you love your body, you should take care of it.
As you point at, “be yourself” is at best a euphemism for “be lazy”. It is NEVER good advice. Personally, being self-aware and willing to take on the challenge to improve is part of a winning long term strategy. In the short term, use all the illusion and guile it takes to win. Keep in mind, that you ultimate HAVE to make whatever illusion the reality (“fake it till you make it”), or be prepared to separate your heart from your mind. Note that failure to do this is why many relationships fail (personal, employment, etc…) Separating your heart from your mind is much easier on the job (hey, many sales advocates do this). In personal relationships? Well, this is a large part why people cheat. Remember too, that changing oneself is independent from changing the behavior (the mind) and beliefs (the heart) of others. Those that tell you, “You can’t change others”, are feeding you a similar lie. You can. It is all part of the game of life. Of course, there are bad cards dealt. These can include behaviors of others that are often just socially engineered and reinforced (e.g. racism). Just “being yourself” is not enough to make the difference (be it personally, or systemically) in those cases. Don’t be propagate the problem with apathy. Be the difference.
I've always thought that people don't really change. We just grow, learn and live on top of our unwanted behaviors. So what I would say is "Go make a difference"
I'm a very shy dude so I try to stand out by being well dressed. If I just stayed the same and been myself I'd still be the quiet kid nobody cared about. But dressing well gave me the self confidence to change who I am and thereby helped a lot at getting less shy and more open.
Antonio , point well made. Sometimes we have to get a little uncomfortable to grow. It’s inspirational to see those that take that opportunity! See you on the next one!
My advice take small steps and step outside your comfort zone. Try different things and go to different places. Start small like going to a coffee shop and reading a book. Say hi to random people in public. Make a connection with people you work with. Just relax and get out of your own head. Try dressing different, if you feel confident and relaxed people will approach you. Example for me. Yesterday I attended a rally that had a sizable crowd. I attended the rally to provide security for the protesters. I was part of a group that carried firearms has a show of force. Many people approached us and thanked us for being there. Normally I avoid crowds. I stepped out side my comfort zone and actually enjoyed myself, my confidence grew and it showed.
WATCH NEXT: 🔴 I'm Single, Lazy, Awkward & Overwhelmed!" My Brutally Honest Advice To An 18 Year Old - ua-cam.com/video/147DgeWApYw/v-deo.html
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What's the best advice you've even been given? Let me know in the comments!
Just for 18!
What about 30 in such situations?
Solid advice. Thank you again Antonio!
Don't be yourself. Become your best self.
Please make a video with Beer biceps ❤️🔥
This is a reply to a certain female UA-camr I m guessing 🤣🤣 Nice video
That Bird is just being itself....
You're totally right!
LOL
Haha yes, best comment.
Of course. A hummingbird becomes its self by flying like a helicopter
Genius..comment of the year😅
"Be the best version of yourself, and everything else will fall into place"
It sounds extremely ignorant.
@@blackharpy7468 its true though.
Define "Best".
As a person with severe autism, no matter how hard I try to change myself because being myself pushes people away, the best version of myself is still so socially awkward that I can’t get a date after 8 years of trying.
@@blackharpy7468 Well what is the alternative? Be a lazy, out of shape, weak, passive, incompetent and socially awkward NEET? Oh hell no.
That's why I prefer the saying "Be the BEST version of yourself". Everyone has flaws so we should be willing to improve ourselves if we expect to achieve greater things.
Agree Alvin: --well-meaning people may not express their intention as you did. Antonio's advice is good: envision a personal ideal and work toward it. Then each step is FORWARD!
Everyone has flaws and it really is up to their peers to not only accept them, but also lend a hand in helping that person overcome those flaws.
Originality is nice but if there will always room for improvement. Everyone deserves improvement in their life. Encouraging people to be themselves might make them complacent
You have a very good point there Tarabas!
@Tarabas Basbas I completely agree with you
@@RealMenRealStyle thanks sir
@@Loremipsum6665 You took the words right outta my mouth. :)
Sitting at this bench and the background, gives me a feeling that Antonio is some kind of father to us, who tries to give us some advices and lessons for life. I’m 21 years old and my father haven’t teach me a lot, so I appreciate your content because you give some of your younger viewers the feeling of someone we lack of. I always loved your content, Mr Antonio Centeno! Keep it going!
COIN WINNER - Reach out to me via my contact form at RealMenRealStyle.com with your address!
I loved the bird in the beginning. 😂😂
Well, I sure didn't! 😂
Blue Jay.
"Being myself" in my life has never taken me anywhere. However, admitting to myself that i can be better and I can do better has led me to bettering myself and realizing I deserve better than I was getting. It was only after realizing I didn't have to be myself was I able to get out of a toxic relationship and change just about every aspect of myself for the better. Now, I get treated better and I get noticed. To be honest, being myself didn't feel very good.. Being who I am now, feels amazing. GO Navy!
That "Nani" caught me off guard!
Time stamp?
@@silverstreak8958 the intro, you'll hear it
As Muscle Man once said, "I _can't_ be myself! Myself sucks!"
You know who else sucks..........?
*M Y M O M*
@@billysinge8977 Then she needs to stop being herself.
But don't tell her that!
Be the best version of you that you can. Remember, humans are just well dressed animals. They are far from perfect. Gotta work to be great.
Some people don't want you to improve yourself because they don't want you to become better than them.
YES. This is something I've been thinking about for a long time, we are constantly being told to be ourselves, be happy with who we are, that we are amazing whoever we are, that bs. That will not make anyone happy. The only way to be happier is to not be set in your ways and constantly look for things to improve; physically, mentally, spiritually, financially... I'm so glad someone with a platform is sending this important message out, more people should, just to counterbalance the overwhelming ammount of toxic self acceptance present in popular culture.
Being myself has actually gotten me into more trouble than being "the best version of myself" at that moment. So I'm now trying my best to figure out what I really want to do. Especially now that I've just graduated uni.
“Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.”
― Oscar Wilde
Being yourself means being who you are vs trying to be someone who you are not! It doesn’t mean you don’t improve, or try to become the best version of yourself. In fact, being yourself helps you understand where you are, and where you want to be. In this transactional world, it is quite difficult to even understand your own self. We almost, always try to be who we think we are ( based on what people make us believe) rather than actually being who we really are.
The things that you do and do not do are far more important than you think. It is not only my fate that depends on whether I get my act together and live out my genuine being, but it is also everyone that I am networked with. Be afraid of pursuing something meaningful, but be more afraid of standing still.
Just being yourself isn't a key. I studied in an awful public school in the criminal neighborhood in small Russian town but I always knew that I can become a better person. I studied really hard and did sports regularly to achieve my goals. Thanks to my friends who are constantly motivating me, nowadays I'm studying for finance in Moscow, I talk to interesting people from international financial companies, I learn more every day and guess what? I'll NEVER say to my friends "just being yourself" because they want to be successful in life and they know that we have to deal with our problems to do so.
Thanks for your content, Antonio, nowadays more people appreciate my style and even ask for advice!
Not everyone is perfect there is always a flaw but you can change that.
Love this video, I’m a 15 year old! People did tell me “be yourself”. And I try to be myself but I do want to learn new thing and change myself. Few years ago I had no knowledge about fashion and now I changed and I like fashion! Thanks for the information!❤️
Agreed we as people should always be growing and improving ourselves
I always thought "be yourself" and "finding yourself" were complete bs. You are never "yourself" you are just a reflection of your experiences, yet, you already are "yourself," as you do all sort of stuff that you decide to do etc.
I think you misunderstood the phrase. "Just be yourself" actually means "Don't pretend to be what you think someone wants."
I don't know Antonio personally and I might never meet him in real life but watching him talking outside his house on bench I feel I'm sitting right to him, It feels like an Uncle-Nephew bond. All of this advice is so complete that it covers all the potential questions that I might've had if I was actually sitting right next to him.
Why do I feel so connected with a person I don't even know?
Being a part of this UA-cam community of his for 3 years now, he had me thinking about a lot of actions of mine, how I might affect people, how I can grow as a person, *HOW TO BE THE BEST VERSION OF MYSELF*
In the end, it concludes to the fact that life just doesn't revolve around you, do no harm to others, treat other people like you want them to treat you, some amendments here & there in your personality & character is a good thing to do after all life's to short and you don't wanna spend it with hating others for little things, being all Stubborn. Your personality changes over time, people change sometimes for good & sometimes for not so good. Don't keep your ego above your relationships, the only thing that everybody will ever want from you is getting treated with respect, so spread some love, the world really needs it right now.
And there's a big difference in just being yourself and being bad as a person, you are! evolving every single day so stop blaming it your personality and be responsible for your actions.
☮️
Hey Antonio, hard to swallow but good advice indeed!
We tend to often revert to our worst selves when we don't keep ourselves in check!
Being open minded and always learning to improve yourself each step of the way is a tough and conscious decision.
Being a gentleman is a continuous effort and state of mind :)
Cheers!
This is definitely a new opinion to me. I’ve never heard anyone speak about “being yourself” with this argument against it. Very informative, and nice to hear some new stuff!
Constantly reinventing one self that is the task at hand, keeping up with it not as easy as it may seem, but duable and possible
Antonio, this was a fantastic, thoughtful, and obviously heartfelt video. I appreciate your reflections on humble beginnings and dealings with prejudice. I am an African American man of 51 years who-despite many advantages conferred by an upper middle-class upbringing and a good education-has had to encounter, adapt to, and overcome discrimination and a host of other personal challenges. This is life. When I wanted to illustrate to and instill in my daughter some of the virtues of our heritage, I explained to her the importance of strength in adversity and perseverance. I am grateful that you touch on these themes here, because they are critically important and beneficial to everyone. We are not defined by our present circumstances. If we are down, we can stand up, and once we stand, we can begin to climb. We can do neither without the intention and the effort to change. Thank you for making this simple truth so abundantly clear in this presentation.
I totally agree and thank you for sharing!
I always hear the same mantra "just be yourself." Always dream about be myself. I always motivate me to be myself. Always think about I want to do this and that. But after watching Antonio's video I realized that what I'm doing is not trying to be myself. What I'm trying to do is thinking about the ways to improve myself. Trying to be the best version of you isn't being yourself. It is improving yourself. I learned it from Antonio today. Great content. Thanks for guiding us from darkness to light.
Encouraging and honest! I love the Plato quote. Thanks for talking about the hard things and the real things, Antonio!
I'm already 65% on track where improving myself counts, currently working on the next big step... doing this is quite fun & i hope its also fun for everyone!
That's why I keep a few friends around me that are blunt. A lot of people see them as assholes. I value their opinions. It tends to be the "asshole" friends that will give you the truth and will debate with you about all sorts of topics. Including self improvement.
Antonio, I sent this to my 18 year old son, Alec who is entering his first year of college and is learning how to navigate the social world on his own now. I come from a similar disadvantaged background. (Hispanic but from the impoverished South Bronx) Its important for him to hear and see these principles from others besides me, so thank you.
Man, great video!
To succeed in life, and to become the best version of yourself, you must not see who you're as something fixed
You need to always be open to learn from experiences, and develop accordingly
Remember that every day we face more and more challenges, and this puts you in front of two options
You either become the victim of the challenge, or its student and learn from it how to become better
Be strong, and good luck to all of you gentlemen
This is a really great video. People must learn to take accountability for theirselves. I also believe that a true friend doesn't care if he is hated but tell the truth rather than being liked and tells lies. I pride myself on being honest but also give constructive criticism to help people grow. I really appreciate your videos ❤️
I think the helpful version of this is to advise someone to be "authentic". Don't try to be someone you aren't, and don't try to fit someone else's idea of what you should be. Become the man you know yourself to be, and then be that. Be the best version of yourself you can, naturally and authentically.
Great video, Antonio. These days, your best videos have nothing to do with apparel and accessories. You're adding way more value teaching us how to be the men we know ourselves to be.
I'm a 24 year old woman and I follow your advice as well! 😊
You teach very good things for men. So glad!
I was told growing up to "be yourself, but always be your better self".
About being a self made man. I've had some great influences and help along the way, however the choices (both good and bad) were mine to make. I know that may sound arrogant, but it's really quite humbling.
Thanks for the videos Antonio!
Hey Antonio i watch your videos everyday & i get a lot of knowledge about Fashion,Grooming,Style,Fitness so keep doing it........🙌🏻
Hey Antonio! I'm a huge RMRS point and I've learnt so much from you. However, I don't agree that "just be yourself" is bad advice. I understand how "being yourself" can be interpreted as being complacent. Nevertheless, I don't believe that being complacent and indolent is the message that people are trying to send when they give that advice. After reading "The Inner Game" books published by Timothy Gallwey, I have a better understanding of the true meaning of "being yourself". The Inner Game was founded on the tennis courts. While Gallwey was coaching, he saw a continuous dialogue going on in his student's mind: "Bend your knees..meet your racquet in front of you...you clumsy ox, your grandmother could play better". Gallwey called this voice Self 1. Self 1 can hinder our performance on the tennis courts, but it's detrimental effects are much worse away from the tennis courts. It's constantly either making us feel inferior or superior to others. My Self 1 always tries to convince me that I'm not good enough and tells me to should give up. However, when we strip away all the concepts created by self one, we can discover our true selves - Self 2. Self 2 has the ability to have courage and strength and to love and to be kind. Self 2 has a natural thirst to learn, to excel, to admire and to enjoy. It can learn to be aware of it's mistakes and to learn from them. I think it's crucial that we constantly challenge ourselves and to strive to be better people everyday. However, I think embracing our individuality and finding our own individual purpose in life is the best way to maximise our potential.
A man's core will never change, but he is capable of improving upon himself.
Indeed
Being deeply loved by someone gives us strength while loving someone deeply gives us courage💖
Fantastic video Antonio! I usually like your videos, but I love this one. It really resonated with me. Self improvement was always part of my life and still is. In contrast to your friend I never had problems with others. All at the expense of having immense troubles with myself. Would I have just been myself, I think I would already be no more. But the hope of a brighter future is what motivated me to constantly work on myself.
Shout out to everyone struggling with mental difficulties. Don't brush it off, take your time with it and allow it to heal. Seek professional Help. Someone else's thoughts on my problems really helped me progress.
There are so many great messages in this video and in the comments ts so far. Years ago I was having trouble at work and my boss took me aside to see what was going on. He told me that whenever he saw things like this going on it was almost always because of something at home. I realised that my work-life balance was way off and that I was trying to be everything to everyone at once, reasoning that "it's just the way I am". I took stock and eventually had a career change and a family... all because of that conversation and the realisation that I was using "being myself" as an excuse, like a shield to hide behind. I'm still being myself, just a better version.
Trying to imrove oneself is in itself a tremendous reward. All you need is a clear goal and a plan to get there.
"We cannot live better than in seeking to become better" - Socrates
"If a man knows not to which port he sails, no wind is favourable" - Seneca
This is an excellent video, very useful. In the mid 1990s I was in my 30s and I was always in a bad mood at work. One day a female intern came up to me and confronted me about it. I was startled over her blunt honesty, but I worked on improving myself. After that coworkers became more comfortable with me. I still have to keep an eye on my mood, but I’m grateful to that intern for setting me straight.
I love how there is that extra bit of depth to the stuff you say. I came for the style advice and stayed for the life lessons. Thank you and all the best from Vienna, Austria!
Hi Antonio Thanks for your Work here doing Videos .
Thumbs up.
Please keep doing what youre doing.
The key is self accountability. One can never improve until they learn to hold themselves accountable for who and where they are in the present. Too many people focus the blame outwards.
I will put this as simple as possible " Thank you very much for this video".
I was having a difficult time and somewhere in there, you helped somehow. So, thank you.
You can only truly be yourself and love yourself after you have worked on yourself and what do I mean by that? By getting rid of bad habits slowing you down, learning new skills, getting fit, getting more life experience and interacting with people. Without working on yourself, self love is just a band aid.
Very true. The "you can't judge me 'cos you don't know my story" brigade produces nothing more than toxic advice. We all have flaws, and no matter who we are, we can always make ourselves better.
Exactly what I needed to listen to. This channel is a BLESSING.
A big thing us men need to remember is that improvement can also take time. When we first identify the problem or struggle, not only do we need to make a game plan (and change it when necessary), but also remain consistent. There are certain things in my life I know that it took years for me to improve since they were such an impact on my life. Changing habits and behavior, will take time and consistency and that’s something that definitely needs to be remembered or we can fall into the trap of that phrase “be yourself”.
This boils down to the importance I try influence my friends to practice; at the start and end of everyday take a little time to reflect on yourself, how you feel how you interact and compare it to what you want to feel. Each honest moment will help you become a better, well... You.
Some people tend to shy away from meditation because it is, "too involving"; simply take a second before getting out of bed every morning, don't reach for your phone or check the time, just let your mind wander and find the peace that you would like to carry throughout the day.
I grew up as a young man with divorced parents, smokers, and constant trips to doctors to discover why I am so short (I have a mild form of dwarfism). I was told by several teachers and other adults I just was going to be able to be much because of all my "disadvantages". While I struggled for several years. I got married (25 years and counting) we have 3 great kids, moved through several industries, became a pastor, got my bachelors degree in business administration (at 46), and recently moved into a new job in Ohio (1400 miles from my home town in Wyoming) and bought a house. I state all of this not because I am a great person or to brag, but because I truly believe, no matter what your position in life or the cards you are dealt, you can always move forward. The choice is up to each of us. We can be defined by our circumstances or we can define them ourselves as we grow, develop, and change. Now I am preparing to attack my next challenge, a master's degree in management and leadership. Antonio, knowing a little about your background is inspiring as well. As I said, our circumstances do not define us, we can choose to define our lives in spite of, or through our circumstances. We can choose to stay put consumed by these experiences or we can choose to better our lives and those around us day by day. My motto, "Keep Moving Forward!"
Thanks for the help. I’m a 25 year old loser with a lot of self hatred and a tough past. But I’m going to look beyond that and go conquer.
It's truly is amazing how a well fit suit and a lot of tweaking to your social skills and your personality, you can become a beacon of hope and light for someone, and it's all thanks to you Mr. Centeno, you have helped me to grow more into the man I want and need to be, and I've started collage to be a E.M.T. and I'm gonna be getting a job soon.
Thank you Mr. Centeno for all that you do for all of us.
saying "be yourself" is the easy way to level up your confidence, but indeed, can cause too many troubles, others say "be the best version of yourself" but how can you achieve that if dont know what to improve??, psychologist Jordan Peterson described a few points that could help in those aspect like "Pursue what is meaningful (not what is expedient)", "Make friends with people who want the best for you" "Tell the truth-or, at least, don’t lie" and of course "Treat yourself like someone you are responsible for helping" (there are many other topics too), working on this aspects it can help to transform anybody into a more conscious and better person.
Awesome video, the attachment to one's identity is the biggest blocker of development
Well said Antonio!👍🏻
I think “be yourself” though well intentioned becomes especially unhelpful if I don’t truly know who I am.
I also believe that when we most fully and accurately know God we most fully and accurately know ourselves because we are God’s self portrait.
Antonio just being Antonio - telling it how it is.
The 6 months we've worked together helped me a lot in growing as a person, simply because of you and the team being who you are, but in a good way, not like your friend. Which is why I'm always happy to see you put out a video od this type out - there's a lot of knowledge to consume!
Also the coins are amazing!
Great to hear from you Dom! :)
OMG. I needed this today! Thank you.
LOL, "Distracted by phone" you caught me right there! I was listening to you while scrolling through my social media.
Truly helpful video. Like to watch that kind. Someone said in the comments "Be the best version of yourself" and that statement can sumerize all the talking and even that video. Thank you Antonio
Okay, Captain, This is one of your best videos. I'm glad you show others the struggles you went through. On a side note, I'm still waiting for you to do a video at the Marine Corps Museum in Quantico. Although I'm a retired Army Officer, I think it is a great display of the Corps' history. Semper Fi!!
Be the man you know yourself to be! I like that. And it may even take some time as well. It doesn’t just happen overnight. It’s a process and it’s never too late. You decide who you are and don’t ever let mistakes of your past hold you back from being better.
I spent my first 20 years of my life thinking I knew it all, and the next 20 apologizing for it. I felt I finally had the wisdom to realize all I didn’t know, and the good sense not to make sure everyone else knew it. There’s a different perspective you gain when you care more about the relationship, and not about the championship. I’m just sorry it took me so long to learn. But happy I did.
Hi Antonio, right now I'm trying to help a guy who asked me for help with girls. I told him that he must not change his passions and who he is, but only present everything in a better way, valuing his strengths and putting his weaknesses in the background. You have to be the best version of yourself, but also present that version to your best.
This video came at the perfect time. Lately I've been trying to level up and pick up better habits. This channel really does help, as well as a few books I've been reading like the four agreements and becoming supernatural. The only limit is yourself. My dad always told me you can do anything you set your mind too. As people it's good to always be growing and improving. Be better today than you were yesterday. It's hard at first but it's not impossible. The payout is much more rewarding than you could ever imagine.
This really is one of your best videos you have made! And one of the most meaningful and important ones. (Also kudos to your editor for helping to keep it feeling light and fun even though the topic is quite deep)
As a kid I hated the fact teachers and adults said to me 'Just be yourself'. It worked the opposite way for me - I'm pretty extroverted - I always liked to entertain people and it almost felt like a way of putting me down "Kiddo, just be yourself you don't have to entertain people." Now, about 10 years later, I had some girls rejecting me and I started to blame myself for it. During the lockdown I picked up a new hobby reading books! I read the book '12 rules for life an antidote to chaos' by Jordan B Peterson. This book changed my perspective on being myself. It changed my way of thinking to 'be the best version of yourself'. If you are struggling with these kind of topics I suggest reading it. It changed me :D
Changing yourself is one of the most interesting things may happen in life.
Same here, raised by a single mom, never had a relationship with my father, (other then the night he left his DNA in her). She collected welfare, and was an alcoholic. I found my way into the Navy, then built upon that after reentering the civilian world. I got into management and had a very successful career. I'm now retired, and enjoying my life, still learning new things and putting in the work to be the best version of myself. Especially learning the finer points of men's fashion.
spot on brother. I'm happy to see you still killing it. let's do lunch soon.
Awesome topic! Specially now that i been reading into Stoicism. we were given two ears and one mouth for a reason: to listen more than we talk. And since we have two eyes, we are obligated to read and observe more than we talk as well
Humility is what truly every man needs every now and then. We need to improve ourselves constantly, because this world is constantly changing.
If I'm gonna give an advice of ''Be yourself'' I usually give it in the dating situations. Lots of men try too hard for this stuff and show a persona which is not them. And then they get what they want and curtains fall off, that usually results in a broken relationship and sad people. Do not hide your true colors.
I use myself as an example. If you look at me from outside/from socials yeah I'm always working, traveling, taking photos, trying new things but inside I'm just a guy who loves anime and sci-fi movies/series, who goes out sometimes to do different stuff. And in the beginning of the dates, usually this turns people off because they have created their expectations for me. Be yourself is the working advice here.
But in life, you need to better yourself in every aspect, so when you spend time alone, you feel proud of yourself. If you don't, you will just feel regret; or you will be ignorant, which is double bad.
Sitting here at work on a different continent and all I can say is "truer words haven't been spoken", we are constantly changing and evolving or devolving dependant on what we tell ourselves and what we surround ourselves around. Think of the age old saying "show me your five best friends and I'll show you the next five years of your life.
I, myself, took 5 months of my life and left my entire world and immersed myself in an entirely different culture and broadened my view as well as found areas of my life which I could improve on.
Point is, we can all be ourselves, but the core question should actually be "Is the person you are right now going to move you forward, keep you stagnant or bring you down?"
Great advice Antonio! I hate wearing suits, but I always get compliments when I wear one. I'm definitely not "being myself" when I wear one, but life is about results, not how I feel.
There's always room for improvement. Staying yourself will keep you stagnant. For example, I'm currently working as a school janitor. If I be myself, I'll forever stay at a position like that. Instead, I'm working at improving myself and upgrading so I can go back to school for a degree in environmental science. Thus, I need to be someone else to change into the person I want to be. As you mentioned at the end of the video, being authentic to yourself is better advice than being yourself. That way you can always grow as a person.
The common thread is always to be your BEST self. Basically who do you admire most, identify why you admire them, and try to improve in developing the qualities you admired.
In my opinion almost everything comes down to choice. You choose to believe that you can't change because it's easier. I really hate it when someone sais once a cheater always a cheater or if he served a sentence thats it that person will be a criminal his whole life. There are a lot of people that think like that and it is just false because that person has seen the consequences of his actions and he is more likely not to do them again. The point is that "being yourself" is choosing a life style or an action you can change or improve.
Loving the memes in between. Making fun of ourselves is the best humor out there.
Man, I needed to hear this.
Thank you, RMRS!
I love the way you bring stories in conversation .
Be yourself harsh for you as the man who is your boss , but you don't like him is an good example .
I'm myself by always improving myself and ask people to poke holes in what I say and do, so I'm more aware of my presence and can grow further
“Be the best version of yourself” is slightly better than “be yourself”, but not by much. It’s not like you can wake up each day and choose to be a great person, as if you were choosing what to wear from your closet. Building character takes time and dedication, and it’s a sliding scale from bad to good. You have to work towards it, you can’t just “will” it to happen.
I greatly appreciate these videos. I am def a “it’s who I am man” and have been trying to change that. This video is a great way to help me improve on that and pass on some help to my friends that fall into the same trap.
Awesome editing and really good subject! Please keep them coming
Salutations from Mexico
Ps your porch looks incredible as a Mexican that has lived all his life here, I love the architecture of US houses like that
I didn't know I needed to watch this today; until I watched it. Thanks mate!👍
Antonio, I have been following you for three years now, and I am truly impressed with the level and the depth of content you deliver.
This type of self image talks is really something we really need, esprcially in rough times such as these.
Thanks for this video, Antonio! I've always had a problem with the idea of "Just be yourself" but didn't know how to explain it until now. I much prefer "Be the best possible version of yourself".
I wholehearted agree with you,, Antonio. I have not listened to the "be yourself" advice since I was in high school, because at the time, I was still trying to figure out who I wanted to be as a person and what I wanted to do in life. Fast forward to now, I am a completely different and better person I was just 4 years ago. What I say is don't be yourself, but find a person or group of people you aspire to be like, and work towards living in their lifestyle professionally, personally, and physically. It takes years to become the person you aspire to be, whether that is wanting to become a lawyer or being the best body builder at the gym. Growing a family or becoming a successful business owner, and along the way, you will figure out that there is something else that you can do to improve yourself, so therefore it truly takes a lifetime to become the best you know yourself to be and it is the journey to get there that defines us individually.
Edit: I go for a walk a few times a week at the park and sit at a park bench to get some fresh air and be able to really think. A forward thinker like me is always thinking about how to do something to make tomorrow a day of success. I went to a brief a few weeks ago and the presenter said something I will never forget. "Today will be the worst day of your professional life because you will come back to your job tomorrow and use something you learned today to make a better tomorrow."
COIN WINNER - Reach out to me via my contact form at RealMenRealStyle.com with your address!
In my opinion the only way to be happy in this life is by accomplishing something. This is why successful people and people that you recognize as always being happy are so goal oriented, not only that, but they are always actively doing something to improve themselves. Be yourself? No. Be true to your morals and beliefs, but never stop refining yourself and becoming a better version of yourself.
This is why I struggle with the idea of the self love/body movement that is going on right now. Loving yourself and loving your body doesn't mean that you should be okay with being overweight and unhealthy... if you love your body, you should take care of it.
As you point at, “be yourself” is at best a euphemism for “be lazy”. It is NEVER good advice. Personally, being self-aware and willing to take on the challenge to improve is part of a winning long term strategy. In the short term, use all the illusion and guile it takes to win. Keep in mind, that you ultimate HAVE to make whatever illusion the reality (“fake it till you make it”), or be prepared to separate your heart from your mind. Note that failure to do this is why many relationships fail (personal, employment, etc…)
Separating your heart from your mind is much easier on the job (hey, many sales advocates do this). In personal relationships? Well, this is a large part why people cheat.
Remember too, that changing oneself is independent from changing the behavior (the mind) and beliefs (the heart) of others. Those that tell you, “You can’t change others”, are feeding you a similar lie. You can. It is all part of the game of life.
Of course, there are bad cards dealt. These can include behaviors of others that are often just socially engineered and reinforced (e.g. racism). Just “being yourself” is not enough to make the difference (be it personally, or systemically) in those cases. Don’t be propagate the problem with apathy.
Be the difference.
Maaann this is one thing me and my friends are missing...I am excited to share this video with them🔥
I've always thought that people don't really change.
We just grow, learn and live on top of our unwanted behaviors.
So what I would say is "Go make a difference"
I'm a very shy dude so I try to stand out by being well dressed. If I just stayed the same and been myself I'd still be the quiet kid nobody cared about. But dressing well gave me the self confidence to change who I am and thereby helped a lot at getting less shy and more open.
Antonio , point well made. Sometimes we have to get a little uncomfortable to grow. It’s inspirational to see those that take that opportunity! See you on the next one!
My advice take small steps and step outside your comfort zone. Try different things and go to different places. Start small like going to a coffee shop and reading a book. Say hi to random people in public. Make a connection with people you work with. Just relax and get out of your own head. Try dressing different, if you feel confident and relaxed people will approach you. Example for me. Yesterday I attended a rally that had a sizable crowd. I attended the rally to provide security for the protesters. I was part of a group that carried firearms has a show of force. Many people approached us and thanked us for being there. Normally I avoid crowds. I stepped out side my comfort zone and actually enjoyed myself, my confidence grew and it showed.