The universe can work in some magical ways. One year later I went to China and I found my biological family. I still cannot believe it. Check out my video ➡ ua-cam.com/video/HOi5rhTDX_A/v-deo.html
I was also born during the one-child policy in china. I was the second child in the family and only had my first passport when I was four because our family decided to move to Canada. I'm so glad I was never caught and I couldn't imagine my life with another family and away from my biological parents. I'm so glad you're adopted by wonderful people because if not, who knows what happens.
Born in 90s, went to elementry, middle, high school in a city in China, each class has 1-4 people that have siblings. Their family are usually higher middle class so they pay a fine. In 2001, the fine was about
They must have paid the fee if they were able to get you a passport. Many second children were never able to be registered and therefore couldn't attend school or get basic services. Getting a passport definitely wouldn't have been possible.
My daughter I adopted from Guiping Guangxi. I tell my daughter she is adopted due to one child policy. We pray everyday for her birth parents. She’s my daughter and the greatest of my life.
Thank you so much for sharing your story. I'm so glad that you had a good childhood. I am unable to have children. I adopted my son 37 years ago. I am so grateful to his birth mother for trusting me to raise her baby. He means the world to me and I love him with all my heart. In the adoption process the child is obviously the most important person. That being said the birth mother has also done something so brave to give up her child. She loves this child more than she loves herself. There are no words to adequately express my thanks and admiration to birth mothers everywhere. ❤
You're absolutely right. Although I'm not a mother myself, I cannot imagine how it must feel to give up your own baby. All I know is that it takes immense courage and bravery. As you said, the child itself is the most important person, however, there are more parties involved in this complicated process. Those other parties also deserve recognization. You sound like a great mom. I wish you and your family the best! 💖
This is a bit of a random takeaway but in your childhood videos, it looks like your sister just adored you. I’m glad you were treated like a blessing. Thank you for sharing your story!
@@chennabay ah man, I can definitely relate, when my little sister was born I was so so so so so happy and wanted to be her mini mom haha. It's so sweet that you have these videos showing how excited she was ❤️
I was born in Urumqi, China and adopted to American parents at almost 3 years old. My story is the exact same as yours…no knowledge of my birth parents or past life. It’s so interesting to see where many of us orphans ended up due to the one child rule…I am so grateful to be adopted to a wonderful family since I often think about the children who weren’t as lucky. Glad you had a loving childhood as well!
Both of my sisters were adopted from China as babies during the one child policy. Ive always felt so mixed up about the policy because it was horrible and resulted in so much pain, but without it my sisters wouldn't have been a part of the family. I couldnt imagine growing up with anyone else. People always told us that we (my parents) blessed them by adopting them, but i dont think thats true. They were the ones that blessed us.
I like to believe, a protective factor of sorts, birth is nature's way, adoption is gods way. However we know that's not really true. I was born in the myth that was 'enforced adoption.' Fortunately, hundreds and thousands of us were adopted within 10 days of birth. We were all basically told that our young single mums wanted us to have a better life. And our mums picked us from all the other babies in the many hospital nurseries. Hence we felt special. As the conspiracy was more widely known, around 10 yrs ago, we found out our birth mothers had no choice, many drugged and forced to sign us away. Having said that, being adopted at birth and having a closed adoption meant we were safe and only knew one mum, my mum, my kids and grand kids beautiful Nana, I was so blessed, not always easy though, we will always, as adolescents, have questions and anger around many painful issues, I'm just so glad I lived in the mythical bubble of having a 'selfless birth mum' and her desires for me to have a better life. I met my brother when he was 62, I was 64, I loved him immediately, but we don't really feel like fam. He had a good family too, challenges of course, as such is life. I have a sister raised by birth mum, a jealous sister I will never meet. The phone conversation was not kind at all. And another brother I haven't met or spoken to, in a different state. I loved hearing your story, and understand, while different, the complexity of your feelings, it must be so difficult wondering, especially when your parents likley had no choice. I hope one day they meet thier magnificent daughter. Much love to you.❤
I knew this was gonna make me cry but when you said you maybe your biological parents were praying for you and wondering about you, and then when you said that you were doing the same for them, really hit me in the feels. I'm so happy you got to grow up in a happy home and become such a wonderful person.
I am watching this. I am also adopted from China around 2002 at 3 years old to United States. Your video so accurate. We basically the same age. We just live in different country. I was adopted at 3 years old, happy you have good life in Netherlands.
As a Chinese adoptee, your story hit close to home. I’m in Orange County, California now where I’m always surrounded by Asian people who assume I have Asian parents. Your story is relatable and I wish I could like your video a million times over! Thank you for sharing your story!
I am also a Chinese adoptee and lived 10 years in Orange County, California. Unfortunately, my adopted parents both passed away when I was 19. I am almost 27 now and have had to go through the journey on my own. I am just now unpacking what it means to me to have been adopted at the age of 3 from China when it was really never talked about in my American family. It is comforting to know that I am not the only one out there. And that there are many who have found a positive outlook of their adoption story.
I live in OC and have two children adopted from China. When my older daughter started kindergarten, she was so excited to tell me that there were lots of other children adopted from China at her school. I gently explained that most lived with their birth families and were likely of Vietnamese descent, although they could be of Korean, Chinese, Japanese, etc. descent. She ended up making a very good friend whose parents came from China, and I was grateful they taught her some of the traditions of her homeland. Lovely people! We thought long and hard before adopting, and with a large Asian-American population here, we knew our daughters wouldn't feel like they didn't fit in to the larger society. We have been highly blessed to have both of them (now in college) in our lives.
I was adopted from China at around the same age you were (to an American family). The part where you said you don’t self pity and that sometimes you even forget… I can relate to that so much:’-) Thank you for sharing your story and touching on the One Child Policy aspect, I feel like this is something that impacted so many people and yet so many people don’t really know about it. The positive feelings you give out towards your biological parents is very similar to how I feel, you articulated things I agree with in my own experience. The part you said about it helping you understand yourself when you were younger… I had such a similar experience, being exposed to things like what makes a family and what it means to be “real” as soon as I was old enough to talk and understand… man, I love my family so much. Just… Thank you
Thank you so much for your comment! I am very glad to hear that you can relate and happy to hear that you have positive feelings toward your biological family. And as you said about the One Child Policy, I agree. Not enough people are aware of this and understand the immense impact it had on the lives of so many people... I wish you the best! 🥰❤
I love your story. So many people think it's a requirement to reunite with birth parents and demonize birth parents who don't want to reunite with the birth children. You were safe, loved and happy. Many people were safe, loved and happy. And that is enough.
I teared up at your reflections on how your parents must wonder about you daily. And how you hope for their wellbeing also. Yes people have commented you were lucky given the situation, but every child deserves a safe and loving home. I'm glad you got that, and you are at peace enough to have compassion for your birth family. It can't always be easy, but I personally think feeling complete and content with with who you are is the foundation for true happiness. Thank you for sharing your story.
Thank you so much for your sweet comment 🥰 !! I totally agree, being 100% comfortable and content with who you are will bring you peace and happiness. It does take some time and hard work tho haha but in the end it's worth it. I wish you the best!
This was very uplifting to see… Oftentimes we as human beings tend to focus on those events or stories that „went wrong“ - while the opposite, events that resulted, eventually, in happiness and a good life, are just as important and worth hearing. Wishing you and your family (actually, both of your families) all the best and bright times ahead.
Bedankt voor het delen van je verhaal. Als iemand die ook geadopteerd is uit China vind ik het altijd mooi om te leren hoe anderen tegen de adoptie kijken!
In third world countries there are many children in danger, extremely poor, abused, ... ; To have had a beautiful childhood, protected, cared, ...it is a blessing.
There is no such thing as a third world country or frist world country anymore. This label was used during the cold war to describe what type of system a coutry used. Frist world country: capitalist industrialized countries that sided with the USA (Canadá, Austrália, and England), Second world countries: Socialists countries allied to the URSS (East Germany, and the URSS) and third world countries: capitalists countries that industrialized late and remained neutral or on the side of the US (Brazil,México, Argentina, South Africa). The right term NOW is develop, developing or underveloped country.
This also happend in the so called "first world" too. Don't think just brcause you live in a developed country your moral standards are higher than ours. I know personally of multiple histories of mothers doing the close to impossible to feed their children and to keep them safe. Also, isn't the U.S. The country with the highest rate of missing people?
Hi! I'm adopted Mother, and listening your story, has really helped me, to understand many facts about my girl, and what is comming in her heart, I love her so much, I will be there for her in her process of acceptance ❤
I got really surprised when I found that you began your very early life in my hometown, Huanggang. I grew up in a small and distant village of Huanggang e lived there for 18 years before going to university in Wuhan. I am happy to know that you are not resentful to your biological parentes and have a positive mentality to the past and to life. As time passes by, we get wiser, more peaceful and more considerate to others, including our parentes. All my best wishes to you!
I'm an adoptee from China, your story is very similar to mine, it's very touching. A Canadian family adopted me from Jiangsu, in Gaoyou. That's has much I know about where i'm from. I have been curious to know about my ancestry for many years, curiosity get to me quite often so i might try a DNA test soon. My biological parents probably has their reasons and all i hope is for them to be well and safe. Knowing about my birth doesn't mean that I don't love my adoptee family, I love them.
Thank you for your comment ❤️. I totally agree, wanting to know more about your birth has nothing to do with not loving your adoptive parents/family! I wish you all the best ✨️
Life is not lived for reasons, nor for answers, which only lead to trouble. Learn to accept things and be grateful for the help and people who are kind to you, and your life will be full of light.
Thank you for sharing your story. I was born in one child China also. But I was the firstborn as the child that came before me died in our mother’s womb when our father pushed her down the stairs during a fight. I wasn’t given up for adoption, though after seeing stories like yours, I kind of wish I was. I was physically and psychologically abused until I moved out of home as a teenager, though the psychological abuse continued until I finally cut my birth family off, painfully, last year at the age of 37. It wasn’t a decision I took lightly at all, especially as I have a younger half brother (born in New Zealand, where we ended up eventually) who was loved much more than I was (and I was constantly reminded that it’s because he’s a boy and I was born a girl). And I now have two very young children of my own that I wanted to raise knowing the Chinese side of their heritage. But things are so toxic with my family that I decided not to teach my children Chinese so they wouldn’t understand what my mother and aunt says in front of them. Your family seems like wonderful people, from travelling all the way to China to adopt you, to the amazing welcome party at the airport where your extended family came to greet you and show their acceptance of and support for you. I hope you have a great connection with them still, and that you can go through life knowing that regardless of what happened before the age of 2, you are and will always be very loved and very wanted and very much a part of a family. ♥️
My heart goes out to you. Your parents had problems before you were born. You certainly didn't cause them to be the way they were. I can tell that you are giving your 2 children the safe and loving home that you wished you could have had. And loving your own children will fill your heart and help replace some of what your parents were unable to provide for your own happiness while growing up. Sadly, many parents are not whole inside when they bring children into the world. And they inadvertently pass in their instability to their children. God bless you and the love in your home. One loving mama can change the world for her children. 🙏
Hey, thank you so much for sharing your own story. I am sorry to hear about the abuse you went through. I cannot imagine how it must have felt to be treated so differently only based on your gender. Family relationships can be complicated, and I can understand the struggle of wanting to pass on your own heritage (language) to your children, without passing on the family trauma (your children being able to understand your mom and aunt). I hope that they eventually will come around. I wish you the best! ❤
As an adoptee from china also (now in 🇨🇦), I could relate a lot to your story. Great video you made. If you ever plan on trying to find your biological family, I hope you’ll make a video about it since I myself would like to look for them one day. Hope you the best! 😊
There are unwanted kids. And then there is you. Your parents wanted you beyond their biological limits and beyond their country frontier. And your biological parents who took the risk to have you instead abortion wich is a very dark chapter on that country history You are beyond wanted and loved 👍🏻✨ a whole new epic level, loved by two sets of parents who did the best for you
Thank you for sharing your story! I think that parents who adopt children and devote their time, finances, energy and love to their adopted kids are hero’s even though the birth situation is not easy of such kids.
I am in tears seeing how very sweet child You were and how beautifull it is to witness the beautifull bound and unity that developed between you and your Parents❤. Thank You for sharing with us .
UA-cam recommended me the video. Glad I watched it. The video was beautifully made and very touching. Thank you for letting us hear your story. I resonated with the part about acceptance; it can be hard but it's so freeing.
Hello there! Beautiful story, which I also relate to. And it also makes me tear a bit. Being born in China, Dongguan and adopted by Dutch people. I wss 2.5 years old. Now living a happy life in the Netherlands (Amsterdam). 🇱🇺 With almost every sentence I could relate: not knowing your parents, not knowing where being born exactly, and all. The one child policy, girls being less worth than boys. I was born with a cleft in my upper lip. I guess poverty also played a role. Giving me away for someone to find me and give me a surgery.
I live in the Netherlands, a guy I knew once told me his neice is adopted from China. Hope life is not throwing me surprises by showing me a video from her, in a way I also want you to be her, because I have thought of the neice many times later. Have a good day 🙂
I wish your parents see one day your video. You are right, they did nothing wrong, and certainly prayed every day for you to be safe and happy🙏 I ve been abandonned at birth and adopted too, but not from 🇨🇳, I have met my biological Mother, once, when I was 23( she died since, may her rest in peace⭐), she told me exactly what you have said about your parents somewhere, praying for you, and loving you, everyday, she did it too🙏 This link is unbreakable❤ I want to go to my biological country, but I am scared, only my mother knew my existence, and I dont speak the language. But I feel I must go there, to find me. I wish you a good life🌈
I absolutely enjoyed this video. Although I’m not adopted, your childhood clips made me realized that I was loved by my parents even though I felt outcasted because I had 6 other siblings fighting for their attention. I’m so happy you are loved and was raised by wonderful caring parents. 🥲🥹
I'm another adoptee but my parents adopted me at 8 months. I was a baby and I do not know anything about my time in China. I was born in Fengcheng, a city in Jiangxi, and nowadays I live in Spain. I would like to go to China one day to see the place I was born in ❤ I love watching these videos as they make me feel I'm not alone and there are a lot of adoptees who lived the same story as me
Thank you for sharing your story. I have had a fascination with watching ‘adoption videos’ on you tube. It is good to see the story from the other side! I am so pleased that you can view your adoption as a real positive & that it has given you a good start in life. May your life continue in a positive direction!❤️
Lovely video. A lot of young people go through a time of feeling lost and angry without being adopted. It’s nice to see that you have worked through it and become a good person. The only possible downside I can see is not knowing medical history, but I guess there are DNA tests to take care of that now.
What an amazing young woman you've grown up to become. While it's sad for you to think that your birth parents were unable to care for you at that time, it must also be lovely to know that your parents loved you so much they picked you to be their daughter.
My second child is 2,5 ys old and sleeps upstairs next to my 5yo. She has a similar hair cut to you in your early years. My heart breaks for your biological mom and what she must have gone through giving up her baby girl. 💔 I am so blessed to get to keep my babies and see them grow up.
A friend of mine has pretty much the same story as you. She was found on the streets in China (I don’t know if she even knew the city) and got adopted by a Dutch couple too!
Hi Chenna, I admire you to make this Video. I was also adopted from china when I was 6 years old. I stayed in a orphanage for a year. I know exactly how you feel. I think it is very nice that you share your story with us 💓💓💓
Hi Xixin, thank you so much for your comment ❤️. It's great to hear that you can relate to it. Six years is quit old! Can you still remember a lot of your time in China? And have you ever gone back?
Definitely. Because adoptive parents who pay $20K to get a kid from China, and even go to the country to get the baby, absolutely want the child. How many of the rest of us here grew up unloved, neglected, just one more kid that was maybe not even wanted at all
Thank you for sharing your story here on UA-cam Chenna! Adoption is special and unique for everyone involved. I was adopted myself and share my own journey but it still continues. I am still trying to find more of my extended birth family but like me I am sure you agree, a journey never stops. Thank you for sharing!
Chenna, wat een schattige (!) wangetjes, wat een verhaal om te delen. Wat een zachte wijsheid. Ik denk dat je familie en omgeving waarschijnlijk een heel positive inbreng hebben gehad en dat jij een krachtig & prachtig iemand bent. Dank voor die wonderbaarlijke resiliance, die er toe leidde dat jouw story hier op youtube geboren en gedeeld werd.
They did it because they loved you and knew you would find a new family. You are a treasure to your adoptive family and to your real family because they knew you would find your way. I’m so happy that you’re happy, and that your new family loves you. My family had a custom. I don’t know where it came from but I learned it when a doctor friend of the family used to visit. My parents said Dr. Brooks(now long passed away) is your Dutch Uncle. Well I’m not Dutch I’m American, and I already had an uncle, my father’s brother. I don’t know where the expression came from. But in our family, a Dutch relative is a person you’re close to, thought of as blood, treated like blood, considered family. So in a way my family adopted Dr. Brooks as a member. He passed away while I was still a child and when he did I mourned him like he was a blood relative like my real uncle whose also passed on. I have a neighbor whose like a grandmother to me. I love her like a grandmother. It doesn’t matter that she’s not my race. I love her with all my heart and she loves me. Not exactly like a relative but as a loved friend. She’s like a third grandmother to me. When you’re loved by others that’s family. Doesn’t matter whether you’re born into it. When you have a close friend or friends, they’re family.
Hi, thanks for your comment and for sharing your story. Beautifully said. Family is not only based on blood. Everyone can become family, as long if there's enough love, respect, and understanding ❤️. I wish you the best!
Thank you for sharing your story with us, it brought tears to my eyes, may you continue in this path, being loved and being strong, blessings to both of your families.
U r a very resilient n smart person. U shared from the heart n appreciates ur position n took it positively n has become a very matured person with empathy. U will hv ur own family n shares ur joy with others n one day hv ur own family. Hopefully one day ur mum or dad will be brave enough to come forward. Looking forward is the best thing in ur life. Keep up the open attitude n love for ur adopted parents n children. U r loved too....n regardless its unconditional love being given when they chose to adopt. So study hard n be somebody n help others to be better...❤❤❤
❤❤❤ thank you for sharing your story. We just adopted our son from South Korea almost 3 months ago. We vlogged the experience as well. It amazing to hear your experienced and feelings. Thank you again. New subscriber and follow!
I'm sure every person who had to made such a difficult decision to abandon its own child would be very happy to know that the child grew up like you did .
I knew a woman who was adopted after being airlifted out of Vietnam after the fall of Saigon, she was one of the children in “Operation Baby Lift” during the US Embassy evacuation. It took years before her parents could get out of the country and eventually found her in the USA, as she was finishing high school. Her adoptive family was very good to her, so she enjoyed having two sets of parents. She was my oldest sister’s classmate.
I'm also adopted from China and I have quite a few friends who are adopted too. I don't really know much about anything from that period of my life, and I also don't know my biological parents. It's good to know that even if we, who have been adopted from China or any other country can have a family, even thought it might not be the biological one. ❤
Many baby girls were killed or dumped. Not all baby girls ended up in the orphanage. We adopted a son from China, he was abandoned at a hospital because he had special needs. You were lucky.
@E ".. I don’t know everything but something about this comment comes off kind of dismissive and just weird honestly I feel like the only people who really have the authority to comment on an Chinese adoptees relative luck in being adopted is that adoptee themselves or other people who were in a similar position. It’s very easy to sit on the sidelines (even as parents or family members of those who are adopted) and comment about how lucky or fortunate that person is to have us.. but it just doesn’t sit right. it’s actually quite self serving in it’s own way. (And I say this as someone who has adopted family members & said similar things and now wish I didn’t bc it was insensitive and rude of me)" @E I didn't say anything rude, offensive or dismissive. I will not apologize for my comment. If you are offended by my words, the problem is clearly with you, not with anything that I said.
Infanticide is such a difficult topic. While I don’t think that you are ill intentioned in the slightest with your comment, I struggle with how casually infanticide is mentioned. For so many people, this question of luck can be haunting and cause sever mental and emotional trauma. From personal experience, I know what it is like to contemplate my “luck” in this way. I know what it is like to come so close to that fate, but escape it because of luck. This comment- It comes across to me as insensitive and overly simplistic. While, yes, she may be lucky, she also has a right to the complexities of her journey, its ups and downs, the anger and the love. I just don’t see the utility in being so blunt about how you see this person as lucky or unlucky when what she has shared is her gratitude and acceptance throughout a complicated, painful, and beautiful journey. “You were lucky” doesn’t capture that nuance.
@@Bloooopp I have a Chinese friend who was abandoned on a street corner when she was 6 years old. So it hurts my heart so much to hear about this sort of thing.
She's not lucky. She was born into a society where loving parents could not keep her due to factors out of their control. Instead, more privileged people came and had more power due to money and they essentially bought her. Instead of doing what's best for the child, they took her because they only wanted to help her if she was theirs. That's not luck. Most people know their birth story, they can observe the mannerisms in their family, they know where they came from and how they got their health and their traits. While being adopted might have been better to the alternative of spending a life in an orphanage, it doesn't mean her parents didn't want her, didn't love her, or don't long to be with her. Most parents who give away their kids would keep them if they had more money and childcare support, and not being prosecuted by the government or religion. There are rare cases when it's not true, but most of the time children wouldn't have to grow up outside their biological families.
If you feel comfortable talking about it, I’d be really interested whether you’ve ever had a desire to reconnect with the culture of your birth country, and whether you speak or want to learn Chinese (and if so, what variety)? Background: My situation is completely different to yours, I’m Swiss & Finnish and was raised in Switzerland by my biological parents. When I was younger my mother would speak Finnish with me and I mainly grew up watching Finnish-language TV shows. But when I started school we completely switched to (Swiss) German at home, because I struggled a lot in school and a school psychologist told my parents that it may be due to me growing up bilingual (which is, scientifically speaking, bullshit) so I don’t speak Finnish fluently anymore, which has left me feeling estranged from Finnish culture and most of my extended family. I can’t imagine how much more complicated that relationship to one’s culture would be if you were initially raised completely removed from it, so I would be really interested in hearing your thoughts - of course only if you feel comfortable sharing them :)
Hi Krisse, thank you for your comment and for sharing your experience! 😊 It's really interesting to hear how you can relate to me, although the context is different. My desire to reconnect with Chinese culture has been kind of fluctuating. There were times when I was young that I didn't want to have anything to do with it and that I would hate it if someone would link me to Chinese culture. This was partly because I used to get bullied for being 'Chinese', but also because I wasn't familiar with the culture since I didn't grew up with it or got exposed to it. But as I grew older and wiser, I now am totally fine if people connect me with Chinese culture. It just doesn't bother me anymore. Also, I love to travel and learn about different cultures, including Chinese culture. I wish I understood and spoke the language, but sadly I don't. But, I know I'm never too old to learn and I just started to learn the basics of Mandarin haha! So I guess I do have the desire to reconnect with my birth country, the culture, and the people 😉.
Scientific results are not scientific when it comes to psychology. There may be some research showing those children were not impacted by growing up bilangual, but that's not a given for the world population. I hope you can understand how the school psychologist did the best they could. And who knows how much joy you'll get from learning Finnish at a later age. 😊
Thank you so much to share your journey, I will show your vidéo to my daugther, she is born in china in 2012 with a disabillity, we adopt her when she was 4, she is a happy child, we talk a lot about her history, her birth parents, the situation in china when the was born, and we thanks them every year to give birth, at our adoption anniversary, may be some day we will be able to find them...we try our best to support her to be resilient and so far it works : ) even if some times she's got a lack of self confidence. I am so proud of her ! Adoption is also a journey for the parents and in our case it make us to increase our skills as humans being.
When your a child you don't know all the difficulties the both set of parents lived through with your birth ,then having to face letting you go & new beginning with your now family pray u find some blood relatives to help you grow as a adult..
The universe can work in some magical ways. One year later I went to China and I found my biological family. I still cannot believe it. Check out my video ➡ ua-cam.com/video/HOi5rhTDX_A/v-deo.html
I was also born during the one-child policy in china. I was the second child in the family and only had my first passport when I was four because our family decided to move to Canada. I'm so glad I was never caught and I couldn't imagine my life with another family and away from my biological parents. I'm so glad you're adopted by wonderful people because if not, who knows what happens.
Im touched by your story and it's wonderful❤
Born in 90s, went to elementry, middle, high school in a city in China, each class has 1-4 people that have siblings. Their family are usually higher middle class so they pay a fine. In 2001, the fine was about
They must have paid the fee if they were able to get you a passport. Many second children were never able to be registered and therefore couldn't attend school or get basic services. Getting a passport definitely wouldn't have been possible.
My daughter I adopted from Guiping Guangxi. I tell my daughter she is adopted due to one child policy. We pray everyday for her birth parents. She’s my daughter and the greatest of my life.
Thank you so much for sharing your story. I'm so glad that you had a good childhood. I am unable to have children. I adopted my son 37 years ago. I am so grateful to his birth mother for trusting me to raise her baby. He means the world to me and I love him with all my heart. In the adoption process the child is obviously the most important person. That being said the birth mother has also done something so brave to give up her child. She loves this child more than she loves herself. There are no words to adequately express my thanks and admiration to birth mothers everywhere. ❤
You're absolutely right. Although I'm not a mother myself, I cannot imagine how it must feel to give up your own baby. All I know is that it takes immense courage and bravery. As you said, the child itself is the most important person, however, there are more parties involved in this complicated process. Those other parties also deserve recognization. You sound like a great mom. I wish you and your family the best! 💖
This is a bit of a random takeaway but in your childhood videos, it looks like your sister just adored you. I’m glad you were treated like a blessing. Thank you for sharing your story!
Thanks for your comment! Haha, yes she was very happy when I arrived and she finally got to meet her new little sister 🥰
@@chennabay ah man, I can definitely relate, when my little sister was born I was so so so so so happy and wanted to be her mini mom haha. It's so sweet that you have these videos showing how excited she was ❤️
I was born in Urumqi, China and adopted to American parents at almost 3 years old. My story is the exact same as yours…no knowledge of my birth parents or past life. It’s so interesting to see where many of us orphans ended up due to the one child rule…I am so grateful to be adopted to a wonderful family since I often think about the children who weren’t as lucky. Glad you had a loving childhood as well!
Thank you for your comment! I also find it very interesting to see where us adoptees ended up. I wish you the best! 💕
Both of my sisters were adopted from China as babies during the one child policy. Ive always felt so mixed up about the policy because it was horrible and resulted in so much pain, but without it my sisters wouldn't have been a part of the family. I couldnt imagine growing up with anyone else. People always told us that we (my parents) blessed them by adopting them, but i dont think thats true. They were the ones that blessed us.
Beautifully said ❤️❤️
I like to believe, a protective factor of sorts, birth is nature's way, adoption is gods way.
However we know that's not really true. I was born in the myth that was 'enforced adoption.' Fortunately, hundreds and thousands of us were adopted within 10 days of birth. We were all basically told that our young single mums wanted us to have a better life. And our mums picked us from all the other babies in the many hospital nurseries. Hence we felt special.
As the conspiracy was more widely known, around 10 yrs ago, we found out our birth mothers had no choice, many drugged and forced to sign us away.
Having said that, being adopted at birth and having a closed adoption meant we were safe and only knew one mum, my mum, my kids and grand kids beautiful Nana, I was so blessed, not always easy though, we will always, as adolescents, have questions and anger around many painful issues, I'm just so glad I lived in the mythical bubble of having a 'selfless birth mum' and her desires for me to have a better life. I met my brother when he was 62, I was 64, I loved him immediately, but we don't really feel like fam. He had a good family too, challenges of course, as such is life. I have a sister raised by birth mum, a jealous sister I will never meet. The phone conversation was not kind at all. And another brother I haven't met or spoken to, in a different state.
I loved hearing your story, and understand, while different, the complexity of your feelings, it must be so difficult wondering, especially when your parents likley had no choice. I hope one day they meet thier magnificent daughter. Much love to you.❤
I knew this was gonna make me cry but when you said you maybe your biological parents were praying for you and wondering about you, and then when you said that you were doing the same for them, really hit me in the feels. I'm so happy you got to grow up in a happy home and become such a wonderful person.
Thank you for your comment 💖
I am watching this. I am also adopted from China around 2002 at 3 years old to United States. Your video so accurate. We basically the same age. We just live in different country. I was adopted at 3 years old, happy you have good life in Netherlands.
Thanks for your response, wish you the best in the US as well 💗
@@chennabay Thank you !
I'm glad I watched this. Your adoptive parents clearly did an amazing job raising you and helping you to understand the world YOU live in.
As a Chinese adoptee, your story hit close to home. I’m in Orange County, California now where I’m always surrounded by Asian people who assume I have Asian parents. Your story is relatable and I wish I could like your video a million times over! Thank you for sharing your story!
Hi Yingyi, thank you so much for your sweet comment! Very glad to hear that you can relate to it 😊. Wishing you the best! 💕
I am adopted from Nepal and lived in Orange California for 17 years.
I am also a Chinese adoptee and lived 10 years in Orange County, California. Unfortunately, my adopted parents both passed away when I was 19. I am almost 27 now and have had to go through the journey on my own. I am just now unpacking what it means to me to have been adopted at the age of 3 from China when it was really never talked about in my American family. It is comforting to know that I am not the only one out there. And that there are many who have found a positive outlook of their adoption story.
I live in OC and have two children adopted from China. When my older daughter started kindergarten, she was so excited to tell me that there were lots of other children adopted from China at her school. I gently explained that most lived with their birth families and were likely of Vietnamese descent, although they could be of Korean, Chinese, Japanese, etc. descent. She ended up making a very good friend whose parents came from China, and I was grateful they taught her some of the traditions of her homeland. Lovely people! We thought long and hard before adopting, and with a large Asian-American population here, we knew our daughters wouldn't feel like they didn't fit in to the larger society. We have been highly blessed to have both of them (now in college) in our lives.
I was adopted from China at around the same age you were (to an American family). The part where you said you don’t self pity and that sometimes you even forget… I can relate to that so much:’-) Thank you for sharing your story and touching on the One Child Policy aspect, I feel like this is something that impacted so many people and yet so many people don’t really know about it. The positive feelings you give out towards your biological parents is very similar to how I feel, you articulated things I agree with in my own experience. The part you said about it helping you understand yourself when you were younger… I had such a similar experience, being exposed to things like what makes a family and what it means to be “real” as soon as I was old enough to talk and understand… man, I love my family so much. Just… Thank you
Thank you so much for your comment! I am very glad to hear that you can relate and happy to hear that you have positive feelings toward your biological family. And as you said about the One Child Policy, I agree. Not enough people are aware of this and understand the immense impact it had on the lives of so many people... I wish you the best! 🥰❤
Home is not a physical place,but it is where you are loved. Adoption is a journey and it is a journey of love and journey home.
For Christians, this world is not our home. We are just passing through. Our home is in Paradise, with the Lord. 😸
I love your story. So many people think it's a requirement to reunite with birth parents and demonize birth parents who don't want to reunite with the birth children. You were safe, loved and happy. Many people were safe, loved and happy. And that is enough.
I teared up at your reflections on how your parents must wonder about you daily. And how you hope for their wellbeing also. Yes people have commented you were lucky given the situation, but every child deserves a safe and loving home. I'm glad you got that, and you are at peace enough to have compassion for your birth family. It can't always be easy, but I personally think feeling complete and content with with who you are is the foundation for true happiness. Thank you for sharing your story.
Thank you so much for your sweet comment 🥰 !! I totally agree, being 100% comfortable and content with who you are will bring you peace and happiness. It does take some time and hard work tho haha but in the end it's worth it. I wish you the best!
As an adopted child I am delighted that you were able to make peace with your past and approach your present as you !
I wish you the best ! 💝
It’s lovely that your family made so many wonderful videos during your childhood! Thank you for sharing this piece of yourself with us.
This video brought me to tears. Thank you for sharing your story ❤
This was very uplifting to see…
Oftentimes we as human beings tend to focus on those events or stories that „went wrong“ - while the opposite, events that resulted, eventually, in happiness and a good life, are just as important and worth hearing.
Wishing you and your family (actually, both of your families) all the best and bright times ahead.
Bedankt voor het delen van je verhaal. Als iemand die ook geadopteerd is uit China vind ik het altijd mooi om te leren hoe anderen tegen de adoptie kijken!
In third world countries there are many children in danger, extremely poor, abused, ... ; To have had a beautiful childhood, protected, cared, ...it is a blessing.
Forget the third world. In first world countries are many children suffering the same.
@@cyberspace7208 thank you, is like they find relief in saying third world countries, while the same things happen in « first world « countries too
There is no such thing as a third world country or frist world country anymore. This label was used during the cold war to describe what type of system a coutry used. Frist world country: capitalist industrialized countries that sided with the USA (Canadá, Austrália, and England), Second world countries: Socialists countries allied to the URSS (East Germany, and the URSS) and third world countries: capitalists countries that industrialized late and remained neutral or on the side of the US (Brazil,México, Argentina, South Africa). The right term NOW is develop, developing or underveloped country.
This also happend in the so called "first world" too. Don't think just brcause you live in a developed country your moral standards are higher than ours. I know personally of multiple histories of mothers doing the close to impossible to feed their children and to keep them safe. Also, isn't the U.S. The country with the highest rate of missing people?
@@francanm8754 They think they are better and have highest morals to the people living in the so called "third world".
Hi! I'm adopted Mother, and listening your story, has really helped me, to understand many facts about my girl, and what is comming in her heart, I love her so much, I will be there for her in her process of acceptance ❤
Thank you for your sweet comment! I wish you and your daughter the best ✨️❤️
My daughter was 13 months old, and from Foshan. 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰
I got really surprised when I found that you began your very early life in my hometown, Huanggang. I grew up in a small and distant village of Huanggang e lived there for 18 years before going to university in Wuhan. I am happy to know that you are not resentful to your biological parentes and have a positive mentality to the past and to life. As time passes by, we get wiser, more peaceful and more considerate to others, including our parentes. All my best wishes to you!
The Dutch family is very caring. I think they really love you. I hope it helps with the acceptance of who you are. Take care and thanks for sharing
I'm an adoptee from China, your story is very similar to mine, it's very touching. A Canadian family adopted me from Jiangsu, in Gaoyou. That's has much I know about where i'm from. I have been curious to know about my ancestry for many years, curiosity get to me quite often so i might try a DNA test soon. My biological parents probably has their reasons and all i hope is for them to be well and safe. Knowing about my birth doesn't mean that I don't love my adoptee family, I love them.
Thank you for your comment ❤️. I totally agree, wanting to know more about your birth has nothing to do with not loving your adoptive parents/family! I wish you all the best ✨️
Life is not lived for reasons, nor for answers, which only lead to trouble. Learn to accept things and be grateful for the help and people who are kind to you, and your life will be full of light.
Thank you for sharing your story. I was born in one child China also. But I was the firstborn as the child that came before me died in our mother’s womb when our father pushed her down the stairs during a fight. I wasn’t given up for adoption, though after seeing stories like yours, I kind of wish I was. I was physically and psychologically abused until I moved out of home as a teenager, though the psychological abuse continued until I finally cut my birth family off, painfully, last year at the age of 37. It wasn’t a decision I took lightly at all, especially as I have a younger half brother (born in New Zealand, where we ended up eventually) who was loved much more than I was (and I was constantly reminded that it’s because he’s a boy and I was born a girl). And I now have two very young children of my own that I wanted to raise knowing the Chinese side of their heritage. But things are so toxic with my family that I decided not to teach my children Chinese so they wouldn’t understand what my mother and aunt says in front of them.
Your family seems like wonderful people, from travelling all the way to China to adopt you, to the amazing welcome party at the airport where your extended family came to greet you and show their acceptance of and support for you. I hope you have a great connection with them still, and that you can go through life knowing that regardless of what happened before the age of 2, you are and will always be very loved and very wanted and very much a part of a family. ♥️
My heart goes out to you. Your parents had problems before you were born. You certainly didn't cause them to be the way they were. I can tell that you are giving your 2 children the safe and loving home that you wished you could have had. And loving your own children will fill your heart and help replace some of what your parents were unable to provide for your own happiness while growing up. Sadly, many parents are not whole inside when they bring children into the world. And they inadvertently pass in their instability to their children. God bless you and the love in your home. One loving mama can change the world for her children. 🙏
Hey, thank you so much for sharing your own story. I am sorry to hear about the abuse you went through. I cannot imagine how it must have felt to be treated so differently only based on your gender. Family relationships can be complicated, and I can understand the struggle of wanting to pass on your own heritage (language) to your children, without passing on the family trauma (your children being able to understand your mom and aunt). I hope that they eventually will come around. I wish you the best! ❤
Your feelings towards both your families show you were well raised and loved ❤. More strength to you!
As an adoptee from china also (now in 🇨🇦), I could relate a lot to your story. Great video you made. If you ever plan on trying to find your biological family, I hope you’ll make a video about it since I myself would like to look for them one day. Hope you the best! 😊
Thank you for your comment ❤️ Yes, if I hopefully ever find them I will definitely make a video about it! Wish you the best as well 😘
"сколько волка не корми, он все равно в лес смотрит"... есть такая пословица(
Bonne chance.
I'm so happy you had a good up bringing with parents that loved you.
There are unwanted kids. And then there is you. Your parents wanted you beyond their biological limits and beyond their country frontier. And your biological parents who took the risk to have you instead abortion wich is a very dark chapter on that country history You are beyond wanted and loved 👍🏻✨ a whole new epic level, loved by two sets of parents who did the best for you
Awww ❤ that’s beautiful!
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Thank you so much for sharing. As an adoptive parent, it makes me so grateful to see successful adoption stories.
So glad you posted your story. So many times we hear the horror stories nice that you are able to be at peace with your life
Thank you for sharing your story!
I think that parents who adopt children and devote their time, finances, energy and love to their adopted kids are hero’s even though the birth situation is not easy of such kids.
I am in tears seeing how very sweet child You were and how beautifull it is to witness the beautifull bound and unity that developed between you and your Parents❤.
Thank You for sharing with us .
UA-cam recommended me the video. Glad I watched it. The video was beautifully made and very touching. Thank you for letting us hear your story.
I resonated with the part about acceptance; it can be hard but it's so freeing.
What a cute Kid you were! Looks like you were very very wanted by your adopted family.
Good luck with life.
You seem incredibly emotionally mature and self-aware.
Family who adopted you seem very loving and caring. You were lucky and blessed to be with them. Hope you will find your birth family someday
Thank you so much for your kind comment!❤I hope too!
Hello there! Beautiful story, which I also relate to. And it also makes me tear a bit. Being born in China, Dongguan and adopted by Dutch people. I wss 2.5 years old. Now living a happy life in the Netherlands (Amsterdam). 🇱🇺
With almost every sentence I could relate: not knowing your parents, not knowing where being born exactly, and all.
The one child policy, girls being less worth than boys. I was born with a cleft in my upper lip. I guess poverty also played a role. Giving me away for someone to find me and give me a surgery.
Thank you for your comment and for sharing your experience! I'm really happy to hear that you can relate to it ❤️. Wishing you the best! ✨️
I live in the Netherlands, a guy I knew once told me his neice is adopted from China. Hope life is not throwing me surprises by showing me a video from her, in a way I also want you to be her, because I have thought of the neice many times later. Have a good day 🙂
Very inspirational, as an adopted person myself it is very cool and relateable the story you tell. Keep making videos❤
💞
Agree
Thank you for taking good care of her and God blessed you and your families for all you've done, amen.
I wish your parents see one day your video. You are right, they did nothing wrong, and certainly prayed every day for you to be safe and happy🙏
I ve been abandonned at birth and adopted too, but not from 🇨🇳,
I have met my biological Mother, once, when I was 23( she died since, may her rest in peace⭐), she told me exactly what you have said about your parents somewhere, praying for you, and loving you, everyday, she did it too🙏
This link is unbreakable❤
I want to go to my biological country, but I am scared, only my mother knew my existence, and I dont speak the language. But I feel I must go there, to find me.
I wish you a good life🌈
❤
Who wouldn't be able to adopt that ADORABLE face!! ❤ God bless you and your family.
Haha, thank you 😊💞
I absolutely enjoyed this video. Although I’m not adopted, your childhood clips made me realized that I was loved by my parents even though I felt outcasted because I had 6 other siblings fighting for their attention. I’m so happy you are loved and was raised by wonderful caring parents. 🥲🥹
I'm another adoptee but my parents adopted me at 8 months. I was a baby and I do not know anything about my time in China. I was born in Fengcheng, a city in Jiangxi, and nowadays I live in Spain. I would like to go to China one day to see the place I was born in ❤ I love watching these videos as they make me feel I'm not alone and there are a lot of adoptees who lived the same story as me
Thank you for your comment! I'm so happy to hear that you enjoyed the video ❤️ Yes, we all share the same story and you are definitely not alone!
Asi que vives en España, tu segundo nombre es curioso, chino me imagino.
Thank you for sharing your story. I have had a fascination with watching ‘adoption videos’ on you tube. It is good to see the story from the other side! I am so pleased that you can view your adoption as a real positive & that it has given you a good start in life. May your life continue in a positive direction!❤️
Thank you for your reaction! Very happy to hear that you enjoyed the video 🥰 I wish you the best as well ❤️
Lovely video. A lot of young people go through a time of feeling lost and angry without being adopted. It’s nice to see that you have worked through it and become a good person. The only possible downside I can see is not knowing medical history, but I guess there are DNA tests to take care of that now.
Oh my goodness you were such an adorable baby. So happy to hear that you have a loving family.
What an amazing young woman you've grown up to become. While it's sad for you to think that your birth parents were unable to care for you at that time, it must also be lovely to know that your parents loved you so much they picked you to be their daughter.
That little group hug 🥺❤️
My second child is 2,5 ys old and sleeps upstairs next to my 5yo. She has a similar hair cut to you in your early years. My heart breaks for your biological mom and what she must have gone through giving up her baby girl. 💔 I am so blessed to get to keep my babies and see them grow up.
You have parents that live you. That really is all that matters!! GOD BLESS YOU!!
Your story is so beautiful. You are so loved.
A friend of mine has pretty much the same story as you. She was found on the streets in China (I don’t know if she even knew the city) and got adopted by a Dutch couple too!
Nice to hear last words 😢really it must be very tough to live in orphanage and then adopted but you accepted and happy is good 😊
Hi Chenna, I admire you to make this Video. I was also adopted from china when I was 6 years old. I stayed in a orphanage for a year. I know exactly how you feel. I think it is very nice that you share your story with us 💓💓💓
Hi Xixin, thank you so much for your comment ❤️. It's great to hear that you can relate to it. Six years is quit old! Can you still remember a lot of your time in China? And have you ever gone back?
Even adoption can be more blessed than many growing up in biological family............... Love is what makes a family, not bloodline.
Definitely. Because adoptive parents who pay $20K to get a kid from China, and even go to the country to get the baby, absolutely want the child. How many of the rest of us here grew up unloved, neglected, just one more kid that was maybe not even wanted at all
True that!
I watch the one video "Meet me on the bridge"where one adoptee found her blood parents.Very heart felt story .
Thank you for sharing your story here on UA-cam Chenna! Adoption is special and unique for everyone involved. I was adopted myself and share my own journey but it still continues. I am still trying to find more of my extended birth family but like me I am sure you agree, a journey never stops. Thank you for sharing!
Thanks for your kind comment, always great to hear from fellow adoptees! Wishing you the best and good luck on your journey 🙏🏽✨️
Chenna, wat een schattige (!) wangetjes, wat een verhaal om te delen. Wat een zachte wijsheid.
Ik denk dat je familie en omgeving waarschijnlijk een heel positive inbreng hebben gehad en dat jij een krachtig & prachtig iemand bent. Dank voor die wonderbaarlijke resiliance, die er toe leidde dat jouw story hier op youtube geboren en gedeeld werd.
Bedankt voor de lieve reactie! 🥰
I am adopted although not international adoption I always enjoy hearing other peoples journey ❤
Congratulation you were adopted by good Family...God cares with you so deeply, JBu more🙏✨
I'm blessed to have a chance to hear your story. Bless you.
They did it because they loved you and knew you would find a new family. You are a treasure to your adoptive family and to your real family because they knew you would find your way. I’m so happy that you’re happy, and that your new family loves you.
My family had a custom. I don’t know where it came from but I learned it when a doctor friend of the family used to visit. My parents said Dr. Brooks(now long passed away) is your Dutch Uncle. Well I’m not Dutch I’m American, and I already had an uncle, my father’s brother. I don’t know where the expression came from. But in our family, a Dutch relative is a person you’re close to, thought of as blood, treated like blood, considered family. So in a way my family adopted Dr. Brooks as a member. He passed away while I was still a child and when he did I mourned him like he was a blood relative like my real uncle whose also passed on.
I have a neighbor whose like a grandmother to me. I love her like a grandmother. It doesn’t matter that she’s not my race. I love her with all my heart and she loves me. Not exactly like a relative but as a loved friend. She’s like a third grandmother to me.
When you’re loved by others that’s family. Doesn’t matter whether you’re born into it. When you have a close friend or friends, they’re family.
Hi, thanks for your comment and for sharing your story. Beautifully said. Family is not only based on blood. Everyone can become family, as long if there's enough love, respect, and understanding ❤️. I wish you the best!
@@chennabay you’re welcome and thanks.
You are very wise. Not everyone has all the answers no matter who, or where they were born. I do hope you find the answers you are looking for.
Thank you ✨️!
I think your parents found the most brilliant baby girl in China yo bring home with them.
I love your story.
Big hugs from 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸
Thank you for sharing. I'm glad you are doing well and well loved by your new family. God bless them for having a kind heart.
Thank you for sharing your story with us, it brought tears to my eyes, may you continue in this path, being loved and being strong, blessings to both of your families.
U r a very resilient n smart person. U shared from the heart n appreciates ur position n took it positively n has become a very matured person with empathy. U will hv ur own family n shares ur joy with others n one day hv ur own family.
Hopefully one day ur mum or dad will be brave enough to come forward.
Looking forward is the best thing in ur life. Keep up the open attitude n love for ur adopted parents n children. U r loved too....n regardless its unconditional love being given when they chose to adopt.
So study hard n be somebody n help others to be better...❤❤❤
Thank you for your comment and your encouraging words! 🙏🏽❤️
My god!!!I had no idea that this was the 1 child policy in china.How brave from all of you🙏👏💫
Thank you for sharing your story. I was adopted from South Korea by an American family. I relate to your story. ❤ Namaste ❤
Thank you for your comment! Happy to hear you can relate ❤️ Wish you the best!
❤❤❤ thank you for sharing your story. We just adopted our son from South Korea almost 3 months ago. We vlogged the experience as well. It amazing to hear your experienced and feelings. Thank you again. New subscriber and follow!
I'm sure every person who had to made such a difficult decision to abandon its own child would be very happy to know that the child grew up like you did .
I knew a woman who was adopted after being airlifted out of Vietnam after the fall of Saigon, she was one of the children in “Operation Baby Lift” during the US Embassy evacuation.
It took years before her parents could get out of the country and eventually found her in the USA, as she was finishing high school. Her adoptive family was very good to her, so she enjoyed having two sets of parents. She was my oldest sister’s classmate.
Thank you for sharing! Wishing you the best in life and on your continued story.
I'm happy for you, and others were adopted, that's how God's show you HIS love. May you'll be bless always.
Thanks. For sharing your story!! 😊❤😊.. such an amazing journey!! From Northern California!!
This made me tear up, in a good way! ❤
Beautiful video! You are so loved!
Hey thanks for sharing! We’re here for you. Just more support from all over the world. You are loved. ❤❤❤👋🏻😊🧑🦳🤶
I love your history I'm a latin mother with struggles but I found hope in your words thank you ❤
I'm also adopted from China and I have quite a few friends who are adopted too. I don't really know much about anything from that period of my life, and I also don't know my biological parents. It's good to know that even if we, who have been adopted from China or any other country can have a family, even thought it might not be the biological one. ❤
As a Chinese, I'm truly happy for you.
Many baby girls were killed or dumped. Not all baby girls ended up in the orphanage. We adopted a son from China, he was abandoned at a hospital because he had special needs. You were lucky.
God bless you for loving him when no one else wanted to.
@E ".. I don’t know everything but something about this comment comes off kind of dismissive and just weird honestly I feel like the only people who really have the authority to comment on an Chinese adoptees relative luck in being adopted is that adoptee themselves or other people who were in a similar position. It’s very easy to sit on the sidelines (even as parents or family members of those who are adopted) and comment about how lucky or fortunate that person is to have us.. but it just doesn’t sit right. it’s actually quite self serving in it’s own way. (And I say this as someone who has adopted family members & said similar things and now wish I didn’t bc it was insensitive and rude of me)"
@E I didn't say anything rude, offensive or dismissive. I will not apologize for my comment. If you are offended by my words, the problem is clearly with you, not with anything that I said.
Infanticide is such a difficult topic. While I don’t think that you are ill intentioned in the slightest with your comment, I struggle with how casually infanticide is mentioned. For so many people, this question of luck can be haunting and cause sever mental and emotional trauma. From personal experience, I know what it is like to contemplate my “luck” in this way. I know what it is like to come so close to that fate, but escape it because of luck. This comment- It comes across to me as insensitive and overly simplistic. While, yes, she may be lucky, she also has a right to the complexities of her journey, its ups and downs, the anger and the love. I just don’t see the utility in being so blunt about how you see this person as lucky or unlucky when what she has shared is her gratitude and acceptance throughout a complicated, painful, and beautiful journey. “You were lucky” doesn’t capture that nuance.
@@Bloooopp I have a Chinese friend who was abandoned on a street corner when she was 6 years old. So it hurts my heart so much to hear about this sort of thing.
She's not lucky. She was born into a society where loving parents could not keep her due to factors out of their control. Instead, more privileged people came and had more power due to money and they essentially bought her. Instead of doing what's best for the child, they took her because they only wanted to help her if she was theirs. That's not luck. Most people know their birth story, they can observe the mannerisms in their family, they know where they came from and how they got their health and their traits. While being adopted might have been better to the alternative of spending a life in an orphanage, it doesn't mean her parents didn't want her, didn't love her, or don't long to be with her. Most parents who give away their kids would keep them if they had more money and childcare support, and not being prosecuted by the government or religion. There are rare cases when it's not true, but most of the time children wouldn't have to grow up outside their biological families.
This is so important, thank you for sharing 💚
Very brave of you to share your story. Cool to see the old footage from China!
Thanks!❤️ Appreciate it!
Thanks for sharing, of course you should not have self-pity, you are lucky and you are great!
If you feel comfortable talking about it, I’d be really interested whether you’ve ever had a desire to reconnect with the culture of your birth country, and whether you speak or want to learn Chinese (and if so, what variety)?
Background: My situation is completely different to yours, I’m Swiss & Finnish and was raised in Switzerland by my biological parents. When I was younger my mother would speak Finnish with me and I mainly grew up watching Finnish-language TV shows. But when I started school we completely switched to (Swiss) German at home, because I struggled a lot in school and a school psychologist told my parents that it may be due to me growing up bilingual (which is, scientifically speaking, bullshit) so I don’t speak Finnish fluently anymore, which has left me feeling estranged from Finnish culture and most of my extended family. I can’t imagine how much more complicated that relationship to one’s culture would be if you were initially raised completely removed from it, so I would be really interested in hearing your thoughts - of course only if you feel comfortable sharing them :)
Hi Krisse, thank you for your comment and for sharing your experience! 😊 It's really interesting to hear how you can relate to me, although the context is different.
My desire to reconnect with Chinese culture has been kind of fluctuating. There were times when I was young that I didn't want to have anything to do with it and that I would hate it if someone would link me to Chinese culture. This was partly because I used to get bullied for being 'Chinese', but also because I wasn't familiar with the culture since I didn't grew up with it or got exposed to it.
But as I grew older and wiser, I now am totally fine if people connect me with Chinese culture. It just doesn't bother me anymore. Also, I love to travel and learn about different cultures, including Chinese culture. I wish I understood and spoke the language, but sadly I don't. But, I know I'm never too old to learn and I just started to learn the basics of Mandarin haha! So I guess I do have the desire to reconnect with my birth country, the culture, and the people 😉.
Scientific results are not scientific when it comes to psychology. There may be some research showing those children were not impacted by growing up bilangual, but that's not a given for the world population.
I hope you can understand how the school psychologist did the best they could. And who knows how much joy you'll get from learning Finnish at a later age. 😊
May you live a happy life ahead.
Being loved must be a nice feeling
I grew up in the Netherlands and must admit I had a great childhood here.
Thank you for sharing a truly touching story.
Love the wisdom and the life lesson you share :)
Thank you so much to share your journey, I will show your vidéo to my daugther, she is born in china in 2012 with a disabillity, we adopt her when she was 4, she is a happy child, we talk a lot about her history, her birth parents, the situation in china when the was born, and we thanks them every year to give birth, at our adoption anniversary, may be some day we will be able to find them...we try our best to support her to be resilient and so far it works : ) even if some times she's got a lack of self confidence. I am so proud of her ! Adoption is also a journey for the parents and in our case it make us to increase our skills as humans being.
I love this so much
It’s very heartwarming.
When your a child you don't know all the difficulties the both set of parents lived through with your birth ,then having to face letting you go & new beginning with your now family pray u find some blood relatives to help you grow as a adult..
you are blessed to have loving adoptive parents. that's better than having abusive or irresponsible parents like some unfortunate kids grew up in.