And let’s say that OP is dumb enough to take her back, who’s going to pay for her care when she finally goes downhill? She blew through their life savings. Does she think that money just falls out of the sky? Just self absorbed and dumb. 🤡
When she said that I went “so you really could’ve just wait 1 more year and went on that trip with your husband now he hates and divorced you, your kids are just as mad at you for abandoning them and their father all so you could go on a trip a year earlier then originally expected."
@@loganjoh1 I had the same reaction to "5-10 years left". Dementia is *heartbreaking* but a) not guaranteed she'd develop it, b) it's not like pancreatic cancer where you go downhill in a matter of weeks, and c) they already had a modified career/financial plan so she could sample the perks of retirement while still lucid. Running off alone just torched all the relationships she'll need to rely on if the dementia actually does affect her.
Something that people with family history of illnesses develop is the idea that it's a matter of when not if. Ex was already convinced she'd have dementia, and has seen what it can do to people. Instead of seeking help for her mental state, she basically turned her life into a ticking clock. She was already someone with a selfish personality, it just wasn't bad enough for OP to not be able to work with. The running off to travel thinking everyone would be supportive is the product of her selfish personality. It was magnified by her ticking clock mentality and seeing her mother get put in a mental care home.
@@Olimar92everyone has to be selfish to a point, if you arent, you are a doormat, but taking it to the opposite extreme just makes you someone people hate
Wouldn't it be... karma?...... if she ends up NOT getting dementia? Idk that's all could think of this whole story,... but what if you DON'T? then you've screwed up your relationships with everybody! Oh well. I guess she'll have to "visualize" a happy life with love ones.
Finally, an update to this story. I hope OP gets to enjoy the rest of his life without that selfish ex. How long is it gonna take for her to realize no one will be there for her because they now know what she really is like? She burnt so many bridges all for her selfishness.
@PrincessQ-fj9ly Even less time than that. Women have found dating in their 50's to be brutal. I give it 3 years max before she's back, less if he finds a serious partner. Then she'll flip the script with the "muh victimhood" "he gave up on us" " it was one little mistake " "he promised to love me forever " shtick. Perhaps a bit cynical but it's a reoccurring scenario I've seen as of late.
Narcissistic people like her have built an enabling network. The children may be angry now but will later be manipulated by her saying she has nothing left, and she will be sick and if they don't take care of her she has nothing left to do but unalive herself. And because the aunties don't want to be responsible for the witch they'll also pressure the children. And mommy dearest will then utilize the children to disturb op's life.
@@amandahanson8188 True, I bet she was always hot, and used to being able to manipulate men, (like OP) but a broke mid 50s woman with mental health issues is going to have a lot of dating options.
Yeah, in an appalling way. And by this point, their parents can't really be blamed much if at all(unless they've been coddled or abused by them their whole lives and even that doesn't excuse their behavior). It's all entirely on them now.
It's as if all the having to adult, working, raising a family, etc, causes them to resent their lost childhood. So they throw everything overboard and try to recapture/re-live it. Fair enough if it only affects them, but of course it doesn't. Then they expect everything to be back to normal and for everyone to forgive and forget after they've indulged themselves (because of course, that's how it was when they were children). Pathetic, really.
Wife was expecting OP to turn the other cheek but the thing is OP only has 4 cheeks to turn, her multiple acts of selfishness killed off any chance of working things out.
I get the feeling wife walked all over OP for years. It's the only reason I can think that anybody would be so delusional to believe everything would be okay after she abandoned her husband and children. Yes it's still abandonment even if they are legal adults. Being a parent doesn't suddenly stop when they turn 18.
Read this whole thing last night. And the ex really destroyed everything. Wasted their savings, potentially cost them their house and cars. I’m glad op is getting divorced but he’s gonna be in a tight financial position for years.
From what I gathered, everything she spent, plus some of the monthly bills got subtracted from her in the settlement. So OP might no longer be able to afford a house, but he would have half of the assets they initially had, while the ex-wife has spent most of her assets already.
OP's ex basically made all the choices that would guarantee, if she did develop dementia, she'd die of it alone and unloved. Parting will be such sweet schadenfreude.
It took less than a year for her to burn the money from their joint account. So the top comment on the final update is spot on when predicting the stbx would crawling back in the future begging for money or place to live or whatever. I hope OP,the kids and the rest of family just ignore her for good.
I think that after she did all this, she won't get dementia. The universe has an ironic way to work and I can see how she would be the exception just so she can experience and remember how alone and broke she is now.
Lost Genre Stories:She has comments turned off so OP can't make any comments. It's a one way communication. Good for OP starting a new life without his selfish ex-wife.
I've been waiting for the update of this story! How in the Hell did the wife think that running off for months and draining the accounts was going to work out okay? Those kids are going to see her as selfish. And if she does end up with dementia, they'll remember Mom's months long abandonment of dad while she got her groove on.
Imagine marrying, having and raising kids, and letting the father of your kids take care of your ailing mother for years, and support her too, only to then run off and milk him of all the resources you've built up, expecting to come back on your own time and continue to milk him for support until you die. The audacity. Where's her support for him?
Having a parent with dementia is very difficult and painful. My grandmother passed from it and it's incredibly taxing mentally and physically.. What the wife did is horrible. In sickness and in health. To be married all that time, stole from OP and left a damn Dear John letter and vamp is so selfish, just so selfish. I would be divorcing her too! There is no excuse for what she did. Wow, just wow.. Left him to pay all the bills while she's just State hoping, can't retire now, everything he planned and dreamed for us gone, she took it.. Wow
Both my parents were in their in their late 80's (dad) and early 90's (mom) when they passed. I was so, so grateful that, while they had many physical issues, they both kept their mental acuity until the end. Mom used to complain her memory wasn't as good as it was, but it was still way better than mine has ever been!
@@crichtonbruce4329 It's difficult telling the same story like it's the first time. Looking at me and not knowing who I am or thinking I'm someone else that she grew up with and calling me his or her name. Then, the sundowning. She was strong! Getting beat up by an elderly person is not fun at all. She was the most intelligent, classy amazing woman and to see her a shell of herself was also taxing.. When she was dying she was lucid and told me she can go now because she knows I'm going to be ok and be the best at anything I put my mind to, she loved me. Put her arm down, breathed 7 more times and then gone...
Thank you so much for sharing this. While my parents never faded mentally, several very close relatives and friends have, so I know the experience. The heartbreak and helplessness we feel is indescribable. @@Swnsasy
@@SwnsasyI’m so sorry & I can empathize we went through the same thing with my dad. The wife’s actions horrified me. I worry about getting dementia (Parkinson’s related) myself but would never want my children to go through what I went through with my dad. Yet this wife & mother’s go to plan seems to be leave it for everyone else to deal with. I hope that you are healing & doing well. It’s such a difficult thing to experience.
@@tishjanuary7379 Thank you so much! Yes, she passed on my birthday, it was right after midnight. I met my now husband the next year on my birthday and so 2yrs later we married on my birthday so our anniversary we celebrate us and her. Next month will be 10yrs and at times, I don't know, I feel like she's telling me so this, not that type things. ❤️
My story is very similar to this... Right up until I didn't leave, but I thought about it. Not because I wanted to be away from everyone but because I wanted to go somewhere I could scream, cry and process the ten years of hell without freaking anyone out. Interesting to see the path not taken. I'm glad I stayed.
Oh to be a fly on the wall when that STBX got served the divorce papers. I just feel soo bad that OP will have to work his ass off in order to recover from the selfishness of his ex even with the ex getting her salary garnished to pay him back for her “finding herself” trips. Now my grandpa had Alzheimer’s so I sympathize with what she went through with her mom but this IS NOT how you should respond
I'm so glad OP is moving on with his life. I'm also glad that he told off his ex-wife for abandoning her marriage vows. And thank goodness he hasn't wavered in his journey to move on. Bonus he's doing so with most of his family and finances intact. Sounds like poetic justice to me. 😊 Shame on his selfish, narcissistic ex-wife. 😡 She got exactly what she deserved. I bet she'll regret leaving OP when she's old and frail and needs someone to take care of her. But by then, it'll be too late.
THANK GOD, we FINALLY got an update to this story. Been wanting one for soooo long. What a selfish woman, really glad Op had a semi-happy ending and i hope he lives a happy rest of his life.
Side question: Soooo.... OP said he's back in the dating pool and had success despite being 50 and with adult children. Did he ever mention where he was finding these ladies? Just asking.... for a friend.... :D
She is in for a rude awakening when she needs others and they turn their back on her. Good on OP for sticking up for himself while being an amazing father. I hope he finds a lady who treats him right.
I’m glad there’s an update to this story, she’s beyond selfish and put OP in a financial hole for probably quite some time now and he’ll have to scrape everything back together, just because she was incredibly selfish, I just hope OP can keep a roof over his head. Nobody will be there for her, it’ll be interesting to see how she behaves when she realises that.
Lost Genre is really quickly, because OP updated this story yesterday. Anyway, I think the wife still didn't realize how she fucked up big time and threw all of her chances of being together with her family in the future. It's a matter of time she crawls back to OP and her daughter again, she will blame her mental state etc. However, all of her BS is due to her pure selfishness. She so selfish that OP quickly fed up with her and moved on fast.
@@DrownedInExile Why not? That is some limited thinking you have there. Maybe you can manipulate the younger ones better, and you don't have enough game for the older women.
At least OP is free from this burden now, but I fear for the kids. I hope they don’t let their mother con them into caring for her when she goes downhill. She will likely use the dementia to gaslight her kind hearted daughter. Let’s hope the Daughter has a strong backbone. This is the type of burden that you carry for someone love, and not someone who ditches you when things get tough.
Imagine squandering any chance of having your family love and care for you because you’re worried over the CHANCE of developing an illness. And it’s worse that everything was planned and set to take that big trip together soon, ALL of this could have been avoided but no. Selfishness.
I don't understand how she was allowed to spend all the joint savings. My ex had an attorney put a restraining order on all our joint assets and neither of us could touch any of it. She did this while I worked out of town. I had no idea she had a plan to divorce me. OP's lawyer did a poor job with this one.
She was allowed because she took it BEFORE Op knew anything. It is perfectly legal for one person on the signatory card to withdraw without the other's signature.
My dad never spoke poorly of my mom, and always tried to make me feel like she love me. That’s not how it went on the other side, and it had a big effect on my brother. When you say things mean about the other parent, you’re not hurting the other parent you’re hurting your child, and their relationship.
Isn’t that crazy. She robbed you blind, abandoned you and the kids, drives you into insane debt, and still she gets more handouts. What a crazy world to live in.
Thanks for sharing, LG. I really appreciate the effort you put into these stories, and your own thoughts are generally very insightful and show a wisdom beyond your years. Again, thanks for sharing.
Absolutely have the divorce papers ready and waiting for her when she gets back. Would it be possible to move into a smaller house/apartment and rent your house out for extra income? Even if you have to rent yourself? I think I would go ahead and change the locks if they lawyer agrees. UPDATE 1: She clearly knows what she's about by not posting while she's at a given location. At least OP has one bill off his plate with her doing her own phone line. It's a start. FINAL UPDATE: OP, I'm glad things seem to be working out for you. You've been incredibly patient in a very harsh situation. I'm glad the divorce appears to be going well and that you seem to be getting most of what you want and need. Take care of yourself and your kids. Best wishes.
The hardest part of dementia is how you forget your loved ones and they have to see your slow decline. So instead she alienated everyone so they won't care when she does forget them.
Glad it worked out for OP, his wife sounds so delusional. "I'll ditch my family for a year, take most of our money without talking about it to my husband. I'll have fun wandering around and come back to the loving arms of my husband and children'
I know in my state you can request leave from the court for alternate service. The firm I work at has served ppl via FB. You have to show a good faith effort to personally serve the person and the proposed alternate service method must be reasonably calculated to let the person know (i.e. an active account or to someone who is in contact with her). That way you cannot duck service forever and someone doesn't have to stay married if they don't want to.
I hope for her sake that she doesn't develop dementia because if she does she is going to be in a lot of trouble. Fractured relations with her kids and family plus the complete loss of her husband, means no-one to help. Travelling aimlessly with no friends of roots means even more trouble when she starts to get confused but doesn't have anything familiar around her. She could end up alone and homeless in a strange town, with no idea where she is or where her family are.
Imagine having very good evidence that you’re about to be helpless and confused very soon for the rest of your life, and you think, “You know what I’m going to do? I’m going to betray everyone who cares enough about me to make sure I’m cared for when I can’t care for myself anymore, to the extent they won’t want to have anything to do with me.” She’s concocted the perfect plan to make sure there’s nobody to care when she’s wandering around the RV park alone and lost, or to make sure when she’s committed to a nursing facility that she’s not sitting in her own diaper so long that there are ants crawling in and out of her living body. This woman is a genius. So glad she didn’t just throw away any ounce of goodwill she had built up over the years with one astoundingly stupid (and compounding) decision.
OMG... She was soooo worried about her mother, that she decided to leave her... And why not? Steals from her husband, travel freely and expects that he and their kids will be there to take care of her in case she gets sick... I agree with another comment that says that she's already has dementia.
My boyfriend’s family went through something similar earlier this year, and their first course of action was to make sure all family and mutual friends understood what was going on before the story could be twisted.
Story 1: The OP's wife could be going through a grieving process, but this doesn't mean she gets to be an a**hole to her spouse. A lot changed for her over the past year, people can grieve anything. Or she had a mental break, she quit her job and this wasn't discussed in advance🤔 I'd see if the police could track her down for a wellness check and get a divorce. The wife is bordering on missing. Also, tell her that you're done, divorce will happen. Did the wife only hear what she wanted before her mum went into the home or is this new🤔 And yeah, paint the narrative as accurately as possible with everyone who cares🤓 Update: That sounds like a great lawyer🥳 So the wife's mental health was like this for a long time😮💨 It sounds like the OP is getting all his ducks in a row. So the wife's smart, she only posts after she leaves a location. She didn't think that talking to the OP about life plans would help her figure things out🤬 The wife sounds more and more like a narc, selfish and just "making things happen" that benefits herself and ignores everyone else's needs.
IF she really thought it was "OK with you", she WOULDN'T have Turned off everything. And the fact she's just BLOWING everything off is really shitty AF. WORST thing ANY spouse can do.
You can test for pre-senile dementia which wife is afraid of...there are tests that show whether you are going that route or not. She needs to get tested and deal with whatever the truth is instead of going scorched earth with everyone around her.
Get finance sorted make sure kids know that you plan to divorce her and let the world via the Internet that she has abandoned you and stole money from you.
I'm glad there was a conclusion to this. That ex-wife is going to deeply regret this in about 3 years. After the money and novelty of traveling wear off. She's going to be alone and she did it to herself. Such a selfish, self-centered person. Doubtful she'll get to have much of a relationship with her kids or future grandkids after this. Feel bad for OP. But hope he finds happiness
Taking care of a demented relative for years, th having to put them in a care home, becoming depressed, and fearing developing dementia yourself is completely understandable. Anyone would want to take all their money, quit their job, and travel while they still could. Make lots of fun memories and experiences. Perfectly reasonable..... That being said, F her sideways! A loving wife and mother would talk to her family about these feelings, and get some therapy to figure out what to do with your golden years together. You don't just think "I'm afraid of developing dementia, and I don't know what I want my life with my husband to look like as we grow older. I know, I can take most of our money, leave him, and decide what we're going to do with our empty nest without my husband input!! He'll just go with whatever I want, right?.. Right?.. Hello?!" Pure selfishness, mixed with apparent narcissism!
When she is dying, she will be alone. I hope it was worth it. In a couple of years, she will realize her mistake. And I pray no one lets her back into their lives...because she will only hurt them.
You most likely did the right thing by closing everything down & getting whatever you could in your own name. Ask your attorney if you can claim her behavior is a sign of mental illness. It could help your case. Install as high end security as possible. See about the legality of changing locks. Get everything that’s of value to you into a secure place so she can’t come back & steal them. In spite of everyone’s ad vice, do NOT tell her that you’re divorcing her yet. She may decide to stay in hiding so you can’t have her served.
Glad I wasn't the only one who originally heard this story. I was worried about OP. Thank god he got that self-centered B out of his house; with the kids on his side. Nobody does that to 'find themselves'. They take therapy, they communicate, and they get support from family; or friends.
I hope he doesn't fall for a romance scammer, they target men like that. But if he's interested in a woman in his own age range he will probably be very popular. A lot of divorced lonely women out there who's kids are out of the house.
What is it with people thinking everyone will forgive them for being an asshole? I'd have made sure she had no access to anymore money, and just not tried to contact her. Just a single text "We will be divorced", because there is no excuse for those actions.
Finding my self is just code for I found someone else better but just in case I need you to sit at home and look after the kicks and these why she doesn't need to deal with the stress of cheating
As someone who cared for both parents with dementia until death, I have compassion for the Ex losing her mind and just running away. But hurting her husband is not OK.
My late wife developed dementia. I took care of her but she fell and had spinal injuries that affected her able to hold up her weight and walk. She had to go to a nursing home and I visited her at least 3 times a week until she passed.
First story : Fully sympathise, OP. Your wife has drawn a line in the sand and then absolutely crossed it. She has broken your marriage. She has shown you who she truly is. You are paying for two cars unnecessarily, because your wife did not care about the mess she left you in when she went off on her dream trip. A court can rule that she has abandoned management of her financial responsibilities and award you possession of her car (etc.) so you can dispose of it. Possibly the same with the house. Ask your solicitor about the possibility of asking for a court ruling as you are in financial difficulties as a result of your wife's elective actions. Keep all her communications posted wherever, while she is away. There may be action you can take for 'spousal abandonment' or similar. Find a specialist lawyer to discuss this with. Good luck.
I don't blame OP, but OP stay away from 30 year old women who have not had a family yet or young kids unless you really really love her or she is infertile. Your soon to be ex wife was selfish. She didn't want your input and simply wanted you to follow her and have fun until you had to care for her. I wonder what happens when she develops dementia, not remarried and OP is off the hook? Pray that one of her kids take her in?
"I will wait until she gets back." WHY??? I wouid think her leaving in itself would be enough for any judge to declare the marriage over with. Does she really need to be there for that? Isn't the fact that she ISN'T there enough? I challenge any judge to look at this and declare her a person that wants to stay married.
This is giving me the same vibes as the wife with uterine cancer who wanted a hall pass. The delusional selfishness in both are wild af This wife killed OPs future and chance at having a trip like this
Yeah, I was kind of surprised there was nothing about some friend of hers encouraging her to do this, reinforcing the whole "selfishness is a virtue" mindset, like there was in that "hall pass" story. Maybe there was and she just never felt the need to bring it up. But I guess there doesn't always have to be a singular person acting as that bonus devil on somebody's shoulder. It doesn't take all that much to inspire the human animal to return to its default state of navel gazing. Still, that "visualize my future" crap does sound like the kind of rhetoric she would've gotten from listening to someone like that. Maybe someone she was following online or something.
OP Dodged the bullet he was probably going to have to look after her in the future anyway. Should have left her for having the potential to have dementia lol
Dementia runs in the women in my family. I am 52, and I'm already dealing with mild cognitive dysfunction. So, . I understand the fear and the desire to do as much as possible before I potentially get dementia. But, i want to do that things with my husband and family.
In what world can one STEAL your savings for a selfish “discovering me” vacation and expect things to be ok when they get back. Someone has been watching too much of the delusional Dora’s on TikTok. I’ve seen too many stories of now ex wives saying “TikTok made me do it.” 😂
This is my honest opinion about the whole entire story beginning to end can you imagine being an OP shoes along with his kids as well realizing that this is the most selfish person they've had in their whole entire life who did not even hesitate by the drop of a hat to just take off on them because they feel that their life wasn't happy enough or this wasn't their best life so they need to go find themselves which was just as selfish excuse to do the things that they did plus almost financially damaging OP and the kids And look I understand of the wife felt unhappy and stuff like that she could have just gone the therapy with the OP and if she still wanted to do this she could have just asked him for one half of their savings where they could have eventually come to a compromise where she had time to travel the world and you know get herself together and figure things out about herself and if she felt that something about like them divorcing or splitting was the best way for her to go forward and feel like she could do things that she's never done before cuz so much was holding her back but even then it still just sounds so selfish to me on the wife's heart even if that was logically even a little more better for her to like put it into words that way because it's like dude you chose to have kids with this person you chose to settle down and marry you chose to have your life going the way it is so you can't blame your spouse you can't blame your kids and even though I get to this person could probably be blaming themselves that doesn't still give them the right to just disappear the way they did basically but I just feel bad for the OP and I just feel bad for those kids of his because you know imagine all that that was constantly on their mind about the wife and wondering if she was dead or alive I think that's the saddest part of what this woman doesn't get on how badly she affected OP and the kids like I get it you know everybody has that mid-life crisis young middle age are even old and you start to wonder thank you more in life but you know you shouldn't be selfish about it
My grandfather had dementia. He and I were close when I was younger, so him thinking I was my mom while my sister was me however broke my heart. But there were days he remembered and we sat together and talked a bit while he was in the care home. She's a selfish bitch, that ex wife of his. She at least got to say goodbye to her mother. I never got to because the fucking facility refused to answer my mother's calls and emails to get updates. We found out he died around my birthday last year through my uncle. Don't be like the selfish ex, folks. Be depressed, be upset, be mentally unstable, but love the person at your side. and know they will be there to catch you.
I wouldn't be surprised if a year from now the wife tries to get back with OP after realizing that being a "digital nomad" isn't that cool in your 50's.
@@DarkPascualI agree she will tire of being a digital nomad, but I don't think she will try to get back with him. She knows that ship has sailed, and Op might actually BE sailing somewhere when she realizes she has no one. She burned all her bridges with her amily.
"I have 5-10 years left before I get dementia"
And now you have no one to love you, visit you and take care of you...great job 😂
And let’s say that OP is dumb enough to take her back, who’s going to pay for her care when she finally goes downhill? She blew through their life savings. Does she think that money just falls out of the sky? Just self absorbed and dumb. 🤡
When she said that I went “so you really could’ve just wait 1 more year and went on that trip with your husband now he hates and divorced you, your kids are just as mad at you for abandoning them and their father all so you could go on a trip a year earlier then originally expected."
At least she'll be too demented to care.
@@loganjoh1 I had the same reaction to "5-10 years left". Dementia is *heartbreaking* but a) not guaranteed she'd develop it, b) it's not like pancreatic cancer where you go downhill in a matter of weeks, and c) they already had a modified career/financial plan so she could sample the perks of retirement while still lucid. Running off alone just torched all the relationships she'll need to rely on if the dementia actually does affect her.
She was just grasping to any excuse that would be good enough that she could go and live single life with their savings and cheating on her husband.
We can't know if the (ex)wife will ever develop dementia, but she sure developed an extreme case of selfishness.
Something that people with family history of illnesses develop is the idea that it's a matter of when not if. Ex was already convinced she'd have dementia, and has seen what it can do to people. Instead of seeking help for her mental state, she basically turned her life into a ticking clock.
She was already someone with a selfish personality, it just wasn't bad enough for OP to not be able to work with. The running off to travel thinking everyone would be supportive is the product of her selfish personality. It was magnified by her ticking clock mentality and seeing her mother get put in a mental care home.
@@Olimar92everyone has to be selfish to a point, if you arent, you are a doormat, but taking it to the opposite extreme just makes you someone people hate
Wouldn't it be... karma?...... if she ends up NOT getting dementia? Idk that's all could think of this whole story,... but what if you DON'T? then you've screwed up your relationships with everybody!
Oh well. I guess she'll have to "visualize" a happy life with love ones.
She was expecting to come to a forgiving husband? She already has dementia.
It's not dementia it's delusion
Finally, an update to this story. I hope OP gets to enjoy the rest of his life without that selfish ex. How long is it gonna take for her to realize no one will be there for her because they now know what she really is like? She burnt so many bridges all for her selfishness.
If I had to guess it'll be when she's old and frail and needs someone to take care of her. But by then, it'll be too late.
@PrincessQ-fj9ly Even less time than that. Women have found dating in their 50's to be brutal. I give it 3 years max before she's back, less if he finds a serious partner. Then she'll flip the script with the "muh victimhood" "he gave up on us" " it was one little mistake " "he promised to love me forever " shtick. Perhaps a bit cynical but it's a reoccurring scenario I've seen as of late.
And just imagine if the husband found himself sick or unable to care for himself fully. She would've up and left him in an even worse situation.
Narcissistic people like her have built an enabling network. The children may be angry now but will later be manipulated by her saying she has nothing left, and she will be sick and if they don't take care of her she has nothing left to do but unalive herself. And because the aunties don't want to be responsible for the witch they'll also pressure the children.
And mommy dearest will then utilize the children to disturb op's life.
@@amandahanson8188 True, I bet she was always hot, and used to being able to manipulate men, (like OP) but a broke mid 50s woman with mental health issues is going to have a lot of dating options.
The amount of people in their 30's and 40's still acting like children is amazing
Yeah, in an appalling way. And by this point, their parents can't really be blamed much if at all(unless they've been coddled or abused by them their whole lives and even that doesn't excuse their behavior). It's all entirely on them now.
It's as if all the having to adult, working, raising a family, etc, causes them to resent their lost childhood. So they throw everything overboard and try to recapture/re-live it. Fair enough if it only affects them, but of course it doesn't. Then they expect everything to be back to normal and for everyone to forgive and forget after they've indulged themselves (because of course, that's how it was when they were children). Pathetic, really.
@@laurieharper1526 I think you just described a midlife crisis
@@andredunbar3773 sounds like my father
Peoples like to say that wisdom come with age, that BS.
Wife was expecting OP to turn the other cheek but the thing is OP only has 4 cheeks to turn, her multiple acts of selfishness killed off any chance of working things out.
I get the feeling wife walked all over OP for years. It's the only reason I can think that anybody would be so delusional to believe everything would be okay after she abandoned her husband and children. Yes it's still abandonment even if they are legal adults. Being a parent doesn't suddenly stop when they turn 18.
Read this whole thing last night.
And the ex really destroyed everything. Wasted their savings, potentially cost them their house and cars.
I’m glad op is getting divorced but he’s gonna be in a tight financial position for years.
From reading the update this morning, it sounds like OP will be fine. The ex, on the other hand, is screwed sideways.
@@murdock94 Sounds like poetic justice to me. 😊
From what I gathered, everything she spent, plus some of the monthly bills got subtracted from her in the settlement. So OP might no longer be able to afford a house, but he would have half of the assets they initially had, while the ex-wife has spent most of her assets already.
Ex had better line up a new sugardaddy. She'll need one. 🤨
50 year old woman getting a sugar daddy? Yeah right! She’s gonna die alone
OP's ex basically made all the choices that would guarantee, if she did develop dementia, she'd die of it alone and unloved. Parting will be such sweet schadenfreude.
Better schadenfreude would be that she didn't get dementia, and has to remember as she lives with the repercussions of her decisions.
@@lauralfreeberg2179And the broke future.
@@lauralfreeberg2179 exactly I’m hoping she doesn’t get it for that reason exactly.
One question. What does schadenfreude mean?
@@WeaponXSigma happiness at the misfortune of others it's German.
It took less than a year for her to burn the money from their joint account. So the top comment on the final update is spot on when predicting the stbx would crawling back in the future begging for money or place to live or whatever. I hope OP,the kids and the rest of family just ignore her for good.
I think that after she did all this, she won't get dementia. The universe has an ironic way to work and I can see how she would be the exception just so she can experience and remember how alone and broke she is now.
That would be true poetic justice and I support this. Her karma should be being painfully aware of how bad she f'ed up
Lost Genre Stories:She has comments turned off so OP can't make any comments. It's a one way communication. Good for OP starting a new life without his selfish ex-wife.
Screenshots?
@@robinkholmes7127how will they share screenahots with you on UA-cam? Lmao
I've been waiting for the update of this story! How in the Hell did the wife think that running off for months and draining the accounts was going to work out okay? Those kids are going to see her as selfish. And if she does end up with dementia, they'll remember Mom's months long abandonment of dad while she got her groove on.
They’ll also remember that when grandma had dementia mom left her in a nursing home and didn’t visit her for months at a time if at all.
Imagine marrying, having and raising kids, and letting the father of your kids take care of your ailing mother for years, and support her too, only to then run off and milk him of all the resources you've built up, expecting to come back on your own time and continue to milk him for support until you die. The audacity. Where's her support for him?
It has always and only ever been about her
"I wanted to go before my mental health got worse" Lady you lost your whole damn mind somewhere earlier.
I’m glad he had a fairly good resolution to his situation, and she is facing consequences for the crap she pulled.
Having a parent with dementia is very difficult and painful. My grandmother passed from it and it's incredibly taxing mentally and physically.. What the wife did is horrible. In sickness and in health. To be married all that time, stole from OP and left a damn Dear John letter and vamp is so selfish, just so selfish. I would be divorcing her too! There is no excuse for what she did. Wow, just wow.. Left him to pay all the bills while she's just State hoping, can't retire now, everything he planned and dreamed for us gone, she took it.. Wow
Both my parents were in their in their late 80's (dad) and early 90's (mom) when they passed. I was so, so grateful that, while they had many physical issues, they both kept their mental acuity until the end. Mom used to complain her memory wasn't as good as it was, but it was still way better than mine has ever been!
@@crichtonbruce4329 It's difficult telling the same story like it's the first time. Looking at me and not knowing who I am or thinking I'm someone else that she grew up with and calling me his or her name. Then, the sundowning. She was strong! Getting beat up by an elderly person is not fun at all. She was the most intelligent, classy amazing woman and to see her a shell of herself was also taxing.. When she was dying she was lucid and told me she can go now because she knows I'm going to be ok and be the best at anything I put my mind to, she loved me. Put her arm down, breathed 7 more times and then gone...
Thank you so much for sharing this. While my parents never faded mentally, several very close relatives and friends have, so I know the experience. The heartbreak and helplessness we feel is indescribable. @@Swnsasy
@@SwnsasyI’m so sorry & I can empathize we went through the same thing with my dad. The wife’s actions horrified me. I worry about getting dementia (Parkinson’s related) myself but would never want my children to go through what I went through with my dad. Yet this wife & mother’s go to plan seems to be leave it for everyone else to deal with. I hope that you are healing & doing well. It’s such a difficult thing to experience.
@@tishjanuary7379 Thank you so much! Yes, she passed on my birthday, it was right after midnight. I met my now husband the next year on my birthday and so 2yrs later we married on my birthday so our anniversary we celebrate us and her. Next month will be 10yrs and at times, I don't know, I feel like she's telling me so this, not that type things. ❤️
Glad to see OP got a good conclusion to his story. Thanks LG for bringing the updates to us (always wondered if she came back). 😊
My pleasure :)
Coffee
My story is very similar to this... Right up until I didn't leave, but I thought about it. Not because I wanted to be away from everyone but because I wanted to go somewhere I could scream, cry and process the ten years of hell without freaking anyone out. Interesting to see the path not taken. I'm glad I stayed.
Oh to be a fly on the wall when that STBX got served the divorce papers. I just feel soo bad that OP will have to work his ass off in order to recover from the selfishness of his ex even with the ex getting her salary garnished to pay him back for her “finding herself” trips. Now my grandpa had Alzheimer’s so I sympathize with what she went through with her mom but this IS NOT how you should respond
I'm so glad OP is moving on with his life. I'm also glad that he told off his ex-wife for abandoning her marriage vows. And thank goodness he hasn't wavered in his journey to move on. Bonus he's doing so with most of his family and finances intact. Sounds like poetic justice to me. 😊 Shame on his selfish, narcissistic ex-wife. 😡 She got exactly what she deserved. I bet she'll regret leaving OP when she's old and frail and needs someone to take care of her. But by then, it'll be too late.
THANK GOD, we FINALLY got an update to this story.
Been wanting one for soooo long.
What a selfish woman, really glad Op had a semi-happy ending and i hope he lives a happy rest of his life.
Side question: Soooo.... OP said he's back in the dating pool and had success despite being 50 and with adult children. Did he ever mention where he was finding these ladies? Just asking.... for a friend.... :D
Church, friends’ parties, interest groups, grocery stores….
I've been following this story since the first post several months ago, I have been waiting to see how it ended once Christmas passed.
This is an absolute nightmare. I can't imagine my wife doing this. The hatred would be unbearable. Hedonistism is destroying our society.
She is in for a rude awakening when she needs others and they turn their back on her. Good on OP for sticking up for himself while being an amazing father. I hope he finds a lady who treats him right.
I remember the first part of this! I'm really glad it got an update, ty!!!❤
I’m glad there’s an update to this story, she’s beyond selfish and put OP in a financial hole for probably quite some time now and he’ll have to scrape everything back together, just because she was incredibly selfish, I just hope OP can keep a roof over his head. Nobody will be there for her, it’ll be interesting to see how she behaves when she realises that.
This story is nuts, I'm so glad there is an update.
She figured it was easier to ask for forgiveness than permission. I hate people who do that. It’s a cop out.
Lost Genre is really quickly, because OP updated this story yesterday.
Anyway, I think the wife still didn't realize how she fucked up big time and threw all of her chances of being together with her family in the future. It's a matter of time she crawls back to OP and her daughter again, she will blame her mental state etc.
However, all of her BS is due to her pure selfishness. She so selfish that OP quickly fed up with her and moved on fast.
And she will go nuclear if/when OP trades up for a better younger woman. He needs to be prepared to be utterly ruthless in the divorce.
Ewww "better and younger"? Why the Younger 👀@@DrownedInExile
@@Fingerscrossedout Do you think a woman in her 50s is more desirable than a woman in her 40s or 30s?
@@DrownedInExile Why not? That is some limited thinking you have there. Maybe you can manipulate the younger ones better, and you don't have enough game for the older women.
@@shells500tutubo I'm just going to roll my eyes at you. Your accusation towards me reeks of a confession.
At least OP is free from this burden now, but I fear for the kids. I hope they don’t let their mother con them into caring for her when she goes downhill. She will likely use the dementia to gaslight her kind hearted daughter. Let’s hope the Daughter has a strong backbone. This is the type of burden that you carry for someone love, and not someone who ditches you when things get tough.
Imagine squandering any chance of having your family love and care for you because you’re worried over the CHANCE of developing an illness. And it’s worse that everything was planned and set to take that big trip together soon, ALL of this could have been avoided but no. Selfishness.
I don't understand how she was allowed to spend all the joint savings. My ex had an attorney put a restraining order on all our joint assets and neither of us could touch any of it. She did this while I worked out of town. I had no idea she had a plan to divorce me. OP's lawyer did a poor job with this one.
She was allowed because she took it BEFORE Op knew anything. It is perfectly legal for one person on the signatory card to withdraw without the other's signature.
@@shells500tutubo But how is it any different in his story? his divorce wasn't finalized
@@shells500tutubo You’re right. She took most the savings when she left. I don’t know how I missed that.
Damn, you jumped on this. Update came out like 15 hours ago
My dad never spoke poorly of my mom, and always tried to make me feel like she love me. That’s not how it went on the other side, and it had a big effect on my brother. When you say things mean about the other parent, you’re not hurting the other parent you’re hurting your child, and their relationship.
Isn’t that crazy. She robbed you blind, abandoned you and the kids, drives you into insane debt, and still she gets more handouts. What a crazy world to live in.
Hope we get another update detailing woe and realization for the former wife.
Im really glad she came back so Op could get a divorce from her and really get closure.
He could’ve if she didn’t it’s calls absentia.
@@Dragonmaster0118 but it would have been way more expensive and she ran away with the savings
OP "She's always been self-centered" Sounds like OP fell into the "staying for the kids" trap.
If OP's kids forgive her than they suck too. This woman is garbage.
Thanks for sharing, LG. I really appreciate the effort you put into these stories, and your own thoughts are generally very insightful and show a wisdom beyond your years. Again, thanks for sharing.
Thank you Samuel :) Glad you like my videos!
Absolutely have the divorce papers ready and waiting for her when she gets back. Would it be possible to move into a smaller house/apartment and rent your house out for extra income? Even if you have to rent yourself? I think I would go ahead and change the locks if they lawyer agrees.
UPDATE 1: She clearly knows what she's about by not posting while she's at a given location. At least OP has one bill off his plate with her doing her own phone line. It's a start.
FINAL UPDATE: OP, I'm glad things seem to be working out for you. You've been incredibly patient in a very harsh situation. I'm glad the divorce appears to be going well and that you seem to be getting most of what you want and need. Take care of yourself and your kids. Best wishes.
The hardest part of dementia is how you forget your loved ones and they have to see your slow decline.
So instead she alienated everyone so they won't care when she does forget them.
Glad it worked out for OP, his wife sounds so delusional. "I'll ditch my family for a year, take most of our money without talking about it to my husband. I'll have fun wandering around and come back to the loving arms of my husband and children'
Finally, I’ve been waiting for an update for this story I remember hearing it last year from another UA-camr
I know in my state you can request leave from the court for alternate service. The firm I work at has served ppl via FB. You have to show a good faith effort to personally serve the person and the proposed alternate service method must be reasonably calculated to let the person know (i.e. an active account or to someone who is in contact with her). That way you cannot duck service forever and someone doesn't have to stay married if they don't want to.
The absolute disrespect with those social media posts. Hopefully the kids never forgive her.
I hope for her sake that she doesn't develop dementia because if she does she is going to be in a lot of trouble.
Fractured relations with her kids and family plus the complete loss of her husband, means no-one to help.
Travelling aimlessly with no friends of roots means even more trouble when she starts to get confused but doesn't have anything familiar around her.
She could end up alone and homeless in a strange town, with no idea where she is or where her family are.
Imagine having very good evidence that you’re about to be helpless and confused very soon for the rest of your life, and you think, “You know what I’m going to do? I’m going to betray everyone who cares enough about me to make sure I’m cared for when I can’t care for myself anymore, to the extent they won’t want to have anything to do with me.”
She’s concocted the perfect plan to make sure there’s nobody to care when she’s wandering around the RV park alone and lost, or to make sure when she’s committed to a nursing facility that she’s not sitting in her own diaper so long that there are ants crawling in and out of her living body.
This woman is a genius. So glad she didn’t just throw away any ounce of goodwill she had built up over the years with one astoundingly stupid (and compounding) decision.
She managed to spend HALF of their savings in a few weeks? My god
I was thinking of this story thinking that if she actually came back at Christmas, we should have an update soon.
I'm truly glad she had to pay everything back. Poor bastard never got his vacation thanks to her.
Op I'm glad you divorced your ex😂.
OMG... She was soooo worried about her mother, that she decided to leave her... And why not? Steals from her husband, travel freely and expects that he and their kids will be there to take care of her in case she gets sick... I agree with another comment that says that she's already has dementia.
My boyfriend’s family went through something similar earlier this year, and their first course of action was to make sure all family and mutual friends understood what was going on before the story could be twisted.
poor op, hope he has a great life without his awfully selfish ex wife
Story 1: The OP's wife could be going through a grieving process, but this doesn't mean she gets to be an a**hole to her spouse. A lot changed for her over the past year, people can grieve anything. Or she had a mental break, she quit her job and this wasn't discussed in advance🤔 I'd see if the police could track her down for a wellness check and get a divorce. The wife is bordering on missing. Also, tell her that you're done, divorce will happen. Did the wife only hear what she wanted before her mum went into the home or is this new🤔 And yeah, paint the narrative as accurately as possible with everyone who cares🤓
Update: That sounds like a great lawyer🥳 So the wife's mental health was like this for a long time😮💨 It sounds like the OP is getting all his ducks in a row. So the wife's smart, she only posts after she leaves a location. She didn't think that talking to the OP about life plans would help her figure things out🤬 The wife sounds more and more like a narc, selfish and just "making things happen" that benefits herself and ignores everyone else's needs.
Mark narrations covered this today too. I like you both so I gave you both a view and comment. The story is crazy!
IF she really thought it was "OK with you", she WOULDN'T have Turned off everything. And the fact she's just BLOWING everything off is really shitty AF. WORST thing ANY spouse can do.
You can test for pre-senile dementia which wife is afraid of...there are tests that show whether you are going that route or not.
She needs to get tested and deal with whatever the truth is instead of going scorched earth with everyone around her.
You can test for the gene, but that does not mean you will get the dementia.
Get finance sorted make sure kids know that you plan to divorce her and let the world via the Internet that she has abandoned you and stole money from you.
I'm glad there was a conclusion to this. That ex-wife is going to deeply regret this in about 3 years. After the money and novelty of traveling wear off. She's going to be alone and she did it to herself. Such a selfish, self-centered person. Doubtful she'll get to have much of a relationship with her kids or future grandkids after this. Feel bad for OP. But hope he finds happiness
Taking care of a demented relative for years, th having to put them in a care home, becoming depressed, and fearing developing dementia yourself is completely understandable. Anyone would want to take all their money, quit their job, and travel while they still could. Make lots of fun memories and experiences. Perfectly reasonable.....
That being said, F her sideways! A loving wife and mother would talk to her family about these feelings, and get some therapy to figure out what to do with your golden years together. You don't just think "I'm afraid of developing dementia, and I don't know what I want my life with my husband to look like as we grow older. I know, I can take most of our money, leave him, and decide what we're going to do with our empty nest without my husband input!! He'll just go with whatever I want, right?.. Right?.. Hello?!"
Pure selfishness, mixed with apparent narcissism!
How delusional do you have to be to think your family would still be there for you after stealing money and running around partying?! Ridiculous!
When she is dying, she will be alone. I hope it was worth it.
In a couple of years, she will realize her mistake. And I pray no one lets her back into their lives...because she will only hurt them.
You most likely did the right thing by closing everything down & getting whatever you could in your own name.
Ask your attorney if you can claim her behavior is a sign of mental illness. It could help your case.
Install as high end security as possible. See about the legality of changing locks.
Get everything that’s of value to you into a secure place so she can’t come back & steal them.
In spite of everyone’s ad vice, do NOT tell her that you’re divorcing her yet. She may decide to stay in hiding so you can’t have her served.
Glad I wasn't the only one who originally heard this story. I was worried about OP. Thank god he got that self-centered B out of his house; with the kids on his side. Nobody does that to 'find themselves'. They take therapy, they communicate, and they get support from family; or friends.
She didn’t want her husband to go with her so she could sleep around with other men.
"Finding myself" is Womanese for getting run through! I know from personal experience, "we are on a break," meant I got spit roasted.
I hope he doesn't fall for a romance scammer, they target men like that. But if he's interested in a woman in his own age range he will probably be very popular. A lot of divorced lonely women out there who's kids are out of the house.
this is why you do not put all your eggs in one basket. the eggs being your income the basket being one account.
Talk about selfish.
Selfish? That's putting it MILDLY, I'm afraid.
@@PrincessQ-fj9ly trying not to get banned on how I feel.
"Wanted to leave before her mental health got worse". Too late, I'd say. She's already in some kind of mental crisis state.
This is a first since I have been listening you and Mark Narrations uploading a video about the same story on the same day
It was a new and final update to a story that's already been covered.
Every time I hear about a women going to find herself it usually ends up involving multiple men
What is it with people thinking everyone will forgive them for being an asshole?
I'd have made sure she had no access to anymore money, and just not tried to contact her. Just a single text "We will be divorced", because there is no excuse for those actions.
Where the f is My fckin mood booster lost genre? WHERE IS IT?❤
Hiiiiiii, LG! A wonderful week ahead to you and your family. ♥️🤗
Thank you :) You too!
So glad for OP and thanks LG🌷
Finding my self is just code for I found someone else better but just in case I need you to sit at home and look after the kicks and these why she doesn't need to deal with the stress of cheating
As someone who cared for both parents with dementia until death, I have compassion for the Ex losing her mind and just running away. But hurting her husband is not OK.
But it seems she was not the only one, since she had her husband there. Big difference.
Figures, taking a spouse is a terrible idea. They take and take and take, then get offended that you're not giving more.
Brilliant video LG! OP handled this as well as he could.
Thanks! :)
I's glad he didn't waste time blaming himself or trying to make t work out with them staying together.
Good morning all. Thank you for the video.
My late wife developed dementia. I took care of her but she fell and had spinal injuries that affected her able to hold up her weight and walk. She had to go to a nursing home and I visited her at least 3 times a week until she passed.
First story : Fully sympathise, OP. Your wife has drawn a line in the sand and then absolutely crossed it. She has broken your marriage. She has shown you who she truly is. You are paying for two cars unnecessarily, because your wife did not care about the mess she left you in when she went off on her dream trip. A court can rule that she has abandoned management of her financial responsibilities and award you possession of her car (etc.) so you can dispose of it. Possibly the same with the house. Ask your solicitor about the possibility of asking for a court ruling as you are in financial difficulties as a result of your wife's elective actions. Keep all her communications posted wherever, while she is away. There may be action you can take for 'spousal abandonment' or similar. Find a specialist lawyer to discuss this with. Good luck.
I don't blame OP, but OP stay away from 30 year old women who have not had a family yet or young kids unless you really really love her or she is infertile. Your soon to be ex wife was selfish. She didn't want your input and simply wanted you to follow her and have fun until you had to care for her. I wonder what happens when she develops dementia, not remarried and OP is off the hook? Pray that one of her kids take her in?
"I will wait until she gets back."
WHY??? I wouid think her leaving in itself would be enough for any judge to declare the marriage over with. Does she really need to be there for that? Isn't the fact that she ISN'T there enough? I challenge any judge to look at this and declare her a person that wants to stay married.
This is giving me the same vibes as the wife with uterine cancer who wanted a hall pass. The delusional selfishness in both are wild af
This wife killed OPs future and chance at having a trip like this
Yeah, I was kind of surprised there was nothing about some friend of hers encouraging her to do this, reinforcing the whole "selfishness is a virtue" mindset, like there was in that "hall pass" story. Maybe there was and she just never felt the need to bring it up. But I guess there doesn't always have to be a singular person acting as that bonus devil on somebody's shoulder. It doesn't take all that much to inspire the human animal to return to its default state of navel gazing.
Still, that "visualize my future" crap does sound like the kind of rhetoric she would've gotten from listening to someone like that. Maybe someone she was following online or something.
@@zardox78 I think she had been planning this adventure for years tbh.
OP Dodged the bullet he was probably going to have to look after her in the future anyway. Should have left her for having the potential to have dementia lol
Dementia runs in the women in my family. I am 52, and I'm already dealing with mild cognitive dysfunction. So, . I understand the fear and the desire to do as much as possible before I potentially get dementia. But, i want to do that things with my husband and family.
In what world can one STEAL your savings for a selfish “discovering me” vacation and expect things to be ok when they get back. Someone has been watching too much of the delusional Dora’s on TikTok. I’ve seen too many stories of now ex wives saying “TikTok made me do it.” 😂
This is my honest opinion about the whole entire story beginning to end can you imagine being an OP shoes along with his kids as well realizing that this is the most selfish person they've had in their whole entire life who did not even hesitate by the drop of a hat to just take off on them because they feel that their life wasn't happy enough or this wasn't their best life so they need to go find themselves which was just as selfish excuse to do the things that they did plus almost financially damaging OP and the kids And look I understand of the wife felt unhappy and stuff like that she could have just gone the therapy with the OP and if she still wanted to do this she could have just asked him for one half of their savings where they could have eventually come to a compromise where she had time to travel the world and you know get herself together and figure things out about herself and if she felt that something about like them divorcing or splitting was the best way for her to go forward and feel like she could do things that she's never done before cuz so much was holding her back but even then it still just sounds so selfish to me on the wife's heart even if that was logically even a little more better for her to like put it into words that way because it's like dude you chose to have kids with this person you chose to settle down and marry you chose to have your life going the way it is so you can't blame your spouse you can't blame your kids and even though I get to this person could probably be blaming themselves that doesn't still give them the right to just disappear the way they did basically but I just feel bad for the OP and I just feel bad for those kids of his because you know imagine all that that was constantly on their mind about the wife and wondering if she was dead or alive I think that's the saddest part of what this woman doesn't get on how badly she affected OP and the kids like I get it you know everybody has that mid-life crisis young middle age are even old and you start to wonder thank you more in life but you know you shouldn't be selfish about it
I don’t blame op filling for divorce because she might find another reason to leave and op still young enough to live the rest of his life
Wife will now join the legion of TikToker women complaining "Where are all the good men?"
Lol. He deserves it for getting married!!!!!!!! 😂
My grandfather had dementia. He and I were close when I was younger, so him thinking I was my mom while my sister was me however broke my heart. But there were days he remembered and we sat together and talked a bit while he was in the care home.
She's a selfish bitch, that ex wife of his. She at least got to say goodbye to her mother. I never got to because the fucking facility refused to answer my mother's calls and emails to get updates. We found out he died around my birthday last year through my uncle.
Don't be like the selfish ex, folks. Be depressed, be upset, be mentally unstable, but love the person at your side. and know they will be there to catch you.
She screwed him over so badly
This doesn't feel like a final update I think there's going to be at least one more.
I wouldn't be surprised if a year from now the wife tries to get back with OP after realizing that being a "digital nomad" isn't that cool in your 50's.
@@DarkPascualI agree she will tire of being a digital nomad, but I don't think she will try to get back with him. She knows that ship has sailed, and Op might actually BE sailing somewhere when she realizes she has no one. She burned all her bridges with her amily.
How many agree that she slept around?
👇
Don't agree. Sex is not the driving force for everyone, and in her case she may not have much left to give, even with hookups.
What a betrayal! I wish I could do something for this guy. I’m a broke college student but I’d send him some money if it would help