Let me say this for the people in the back! I want to emphasize this point once again! Vee approached ME during my show to seek suggestions on how to enhance her natural beauty. She CHOSE to be on the show, I didn’t ask or BEG HER. We all know she is already beautiful, but she has been curious before about ways to enhance her appearance. This doesn't mean she needs loads of makeup, high heels, or revealing outfits. It's about making small changes that make her feel more confident and empowered. It's disappointing to see this turning into something it's not. Our focus is on positivity and supporting women. Let's not pit us against each other! Y’all want woman empowerment but y’all being mean girls in the comments and actually learning from my videos! Lord
Worry not my sister, people will always talk. They say if people don’t talk about you, then you are dead, so you are very much alive and doing great things others can’t. Congratulations 🎉🎈🎊 Some are just negative beings. This is what we women need. I was really happy to come across your show, because as a woman it really bothers me to see women who are naturally beautiful, but step out and not care about their appearance. Please, keep this show going. I would also want more on women. We need to understand our bodies.😂👏🏽👍 it’s high time women learn to support each other by sharing views, fashion and many more.
You did a great job and said nothing wrong the truth is just the truth. We are not going to change men they like what they like. Like men are not going to change us we want a man with some money, some substance … it is what it is!!!! you spoke nothing but the truth kudos to you.
She dont have on no makeup and is absolutely beautiful. I love those curls. She wont need to do much to turn heads. Men are starving for natural beauty without all the extras
I'm the woman who wore no makeup and dressed comfortably in sweats and men thought i had low self esteem. Now i do make up and make an effort to look decent and they think im stuck up. Self love and confidence in yourself goes far 🥰 Love the advice btw
I agree. I used to be the same, now that I’m a little older I make sure even when I’m going to the store at night I’m looking decent. For example, at night: no make up but moisturized face,cute sandals, cute clothes, hair done, clean. And yes I do a mirror check before I leave. The older women I admire, those are the ones I imitate and set the example for my girls. Always slay when you’re not sick. Also, Keep your health your priority. Being Healthy is Being Wealthy.
Until “looking good” protects women from being abused, cheated on, gaslit, and taken for granted… you can’t convince me of any reason to ever factor them in to my fashion choices. They are, quite literally, never worth the effort. Do it for yourself…. That’s it… that’s all…
I wholeheartedly agree. Women have to find value in a higher source. Men can look dusty, but women MUST stay fashionable and attractive at all times. Until women start defining who they actually are, the world will never respect us. We are more than just beautiful objects.
Figure out what type of man you want to approach you then dress the way that man will attract. You can't look dusty and expect to attract a high quality man. I stay leveled up when ever I leave the house to keep the dusties away. It will protect you.
@@goddessinfinity1 I look my best EVERY time I leave the house… hell, I look cute INside the house… but that’s for me…. For my own satisfaction. That’s how my Mama raised me. I think I must not have communicated my point, so let me try again…. I couldn’t care less about them being attracted to me….☺️I’m not thinking about “what kind of man I want”….. what I “want” is for all of their a$$es to leave me TF alone as I cultivate the type of life I love to live…
@@lisakimberle That part. This idea that I’m supposed to always be mindful of how I look SIMPLY to dictate how these degenerate MF’s behave is beyond ridiculous…. I look good because that’s how I like to look…. Period.
I disagree. She doesn’t have to be glammed up to get a man’s attention because she’s already naturally beautiful. She just needs to date strategically and increase her numbers of potential suitors that’ll value her for her.
This……all of this!!!!!! I lived in a small suburban town for five years and I never saw those women glammed up yet they bagged wealthy high earning men and lived in huge beautiful houses and this was their second marriage and they came with kids from the previous marriage….oh and they were white women. The black community does too much and requires women to be unicorns when they don’t have to do any of that they simply need to get around better groups of people cause what they’re doing ain’t working.
@@iAMJM27 yea but all women with makeup and without aren’t the same. Lizzo with makeup versus Beyoncé with makeup, who do you think more men with choose? Gabrielle Union without makeup versus Wendy Williams with makeup, who do you think more men will choose?
To me it’s all about accessories. A graphic T-shirt and jeans can give the effort, effortless look if you wear the right accessories : cute sandal or loafer, crossbody bag, bold necklace, dainty earrings, your favorite fragrance 🤷🏾♀️ It’s can be as simply as you make it.
This is my go to. Graphic tee, jeans, either sneakers or sandals, cross body bag, cool earrings, nails polished (my natural nails) and a nice fragrance. Sometimes I literally have to speed walk out of places when I don't feel like being approached lol. I agree that it's as simple as you make it. It's not so much what's on you but what's in you. Confidence is everything 💜
If she’s comfortable in her own skin without the extras she will continue to be ok looking “natural”. I’ve tried fixing up and doing all the things but after I do it; it doesn’t fulfill me or make me happier. I’m extremely happy with being natural and I think this woman is as well. She’s doesn’t need all the additions. She’s naturally pretty. I’ve seen and met a lot of people who are beautiful without the extras; but they chose to get dolled up any way. It really just depends on the person.
I agree as I’ve been trying to enhance my own appearance, but I don’t get any “look good, feel good” behind it. The only thing I notice that changes is how people respond to me. I myself don’t change how I feel/act when I “dress up”. My mindset was also why am I dressing up, to impress who, why do I care what they think about me, but I’ve been listening in on these conversations quite often lately. I’m trying to beat it in my head that I need to look better. the world is going to judge you regardless. even though I don’t believe in “first impressions”, many like to front, I’m more intrigued by conversing than appearances. She’s naturally beautiful, I think every woman is, and we shouldn’t be judged based on appearance but it is the way of the world. Men will feed off your feminine energy when you “dress up” in good and bad ways. But I feel like men who appreciate a woman at her regular (even if not all the time), are just different. *sidenote: I also researched that “more attractive” people have higher health outcomes…
Ok yes bc I am a comfortable girl and now that I just had a baby I a extra comfortable but I Feel like I have to do extra bc I have a daughter and I want my daughter to be more high maintenance than me I don’t have trouble finding a man in Bball shorts I am good with men so I know how to get that male attention but I don’t want my daughter to be like me I want her to be more girly so that it will come more naturally for her to dress up bc for me it’s just too much I might be able to do it for a wedding or event but not everyday it just feels stupid for me to dress up sometimes but I am trying for my daughter
I agree with you, I don't wear makeup either. It's just not something that interests me. I don't think it's necessary for everyone, everyone has a preference.
I wish the conversation was more about being cute for yourself instead of being cute for a mate. I find that when you look good, you are more approachable and you get to have better interactions in general. I do like that they talked about the balance between comfort and presentation. I think it’s important to present yourself in a way that makes you feel comfortable to be approached by anyone. That can look like different things for different people.
But marriage is an important part of our lives. Why deny that we should put effort into that area to please one another. God made us for eachother. As a society we have become so anti-men!
@@jada-roshaybethea5350 I agree that in marriage you should consider how you show up for your significant other. If I’m understanding correctly, the woman in the video is single, no? That is the reason I wish it was more about how you show up for yourself instead of to get a man. Once you get married, please know that your man is going to desire what you presented to get him. I am not anti-man. Married 15 years to an amazing man. I actually think it’s quite strange that men and women are at odds on the Internet lol
Apperance is so much more than just attracting attention is shows how you feel about yourself as well. If you just walk around and slap just anything on your body and dont try to look nice for even yourself that says and shows alot about how you feel about yourself. Take care of yourself ladies! The more effort you put into your appearance the more you'll love yourself!
@@Nwakaego_ if you get dressed up for other people rather than yourself you got some healing to do. If you cant even put in the effort to give yourself the bare minimum of looking decent for yourself and feel good about yourself dont know what to tell you other than go heal and learn to love yourself
@@Nwakaego_ anyone with common sense knows that people who project not just confidence but self love look ALOT more presentable and clean and very well put together vs someone who would disagree just saying
Hi @Virtues444 it’s bold of you to assume that someone isn’t “healed” because they disagreed with the context of your comment. Everyone isn’t broken out here. I’m perfectly healed and happy. I do still disagree with the context of your comment. Have a wonderful day!😁
I think what would work based on what Ashley said in the first few minutes is that you can create a capsule wardrobe so that you still look great but you don't have to put effort into thinking about every single outfit.
She's naturally gorgeous! She only needs to address her attire. Many of these women are doing entirely too much. I swear, you can't tell the difference between transgender men and real women any more. The thick layers of makeup, the 2-inch bat lashes, heavy gloss w/ excessive weaves, are from the vogue "trans" area. I honestly didn't realize until a gentleman friend kindly pointed this out to me. For me now, less is more!
You are 100% correct. The trans women, and the women who wear thick, heavy make up, tarantula lashes, and falcon talon nails, really do look the same. I don’t understand why women emulate the drag queen aesthetic, because they are women. I can understand men plastering themselves with fakeness, in order to emulate women, because they’re men. Less really is more. I’m glad I’m of the generation where women use make up to enhance their beauty. Natural beauty is a conscious decision and action. Maintaining healthy, glowing skin, healthy natural hair and nails, whilst maintaining a healthy weight and toned body are signs of a woman taking very good care of herself. It’s easy to glue hair, nails and lashes onto your body, whilst the natural you is sub par. I thought the woman looked glowing and healthy and pretty. All she has to do is choose her wardrobe purposely, to suit her lifestyle.
I feel the same the natural honey is what men will be most attracted to becauss you really cant tell the difference. Heavy makeup is for clowns and the dead and like you said trans. Men need to see the difference.
The most important thing is to flow from your spirit not to put on an outfit/exterior. If you’re doing it to catch a man, you will not be able to sustain it and it won’t really be you.
It doesn't matter what you look like. If you get glammed up or not or how well you take care of yourself. These men are not worth it. If you dress up or fix yourself up make sure that you're doing it because you want too. Not for a man because even if you get approached by a man 9 times out of 10 he's with someone else. He's dealing with someone else. Staying single and unapproachable is ok.
SABRINA I NEED YOU TO SAY THAT LAST PART LOUD AF ABOUT THE LOOKING GOOD FOR YOURSELF AND NOT A MAN IT'S SAD THAT WHEN A WOMAN LOVES HERSELF AND HOW SHE CARRIES HERSELF ITS ALWAYS WHO ARE YOU TRYING TO LOOK CUTE FOR LMAOOO LIKE MY DAMN SELF DEF NOT INTERESTED IN THESE CHOICES OF MEN NOWADAYS🤢🤢🤢🤢😂😂😂😂😂😂😂💅💅💅💅
Preach! These male worshipping Pickme’s get on my nerve! Put the effort into how you show up FOR YOU! These Dusty’s are not worth it! Stop coaching wm to believe they NEED a man!🤦🏽♀️
She's a natural beautiful woman. I'm all for her staying natural in her looks. I've also learned to appreciate putting a little thought into clothing. I'm a sweats girl myself, but I have noticed that if I simply put on a little flowy dress (nothing sexy at all) just to run to the grocery store, it does make a difference. Men are visual. The average man loves to see women be womanly. There's nothing wrong with that. It's the same for women (at least for me) love to see a man be manly. 🙂
People are visual. What one wears to the club does not an interview outfit make. That being said, there is nothing new about this conversation, which sneakily pits women against each other for their willingness to conform to what men say is feminine. If we learned about marketing, we would really not be confused about this at all. A woman is a woman is a woman 24/7. We have been duped into peacocking for men when it’s the reverse for every other species. 😂
@@cmg25It's not just men, women treat me better as well when I put effort into how I'm dressed. I've received tons of benefits just from throwing on a little 25 dollar Amazon midi dress to run my errands in, instead of sweats or jeans and a t-shirt. In my opinion it's in our best interest to look put together, so we can receive all the perks and benefits that we can, but I understand it's not a popular opinion.
@@cmg25 Lol!@peacocking. In my normal life, I'm too busy to be thinking about men and looking nice. I go for all practicality. I cycle, hike, swim, do a manual job and play women's soccer-football. We are getting sweaty, dirty, wet, muddy and a ball to the face or boob or falling on our asses. We do not be looking pretty! But I'll tell you that when I do dress up, it's nice to see the men completely speechless, their jaws on the floor and their eyes bulging. Lol! I go to bars and clubs and restaurants and social events where I do dress up but doing that every day is way too much when I'm more focused on my health and wealth. Even if women do this to get married to a man what happens when you have kids and they are constantly throwing up and pooping and peeing on you?..in public..Most husbands I know do not dress up to go to the grocery store. They have one child in the stroller, the other child on their shoulders and are in shorts, a hoodie a t-shirt, and crocs..Lol! The single dads get more time to look after themselves but the dads that live with their kids and the mom 24/7 do not have that time.
I honestly think she looks fine. She’s naturally pretty. Her hair is beautiful and looks styled and clean. Her skin is clear, radiant and looks clean with little to no makeup. Nails look clean. She’s wearing jewelry. She said she knows how to do it up for special occasions like recitals and dates. She’s fine. I think there’s very few men who would have an issue with her dressing like so to go to the supermarket. Most millionaire celebrities and models look like she does while going to the supermarket. If she wants to put in more effort for herself then sure. But I don’t think she has to change a thing about her appearance to get a good quality man.
Well…..it weeds out the fakes and shallow hearted….this is how I look on the real. Plastic attracts plastic. Nothing wrong with improving your looks…..absolutely, self care and love is a must, but real is real.
I agree because if you’re not going keep that up. At least attract a man that is okay with how you dress. I will add this caveat. Naturally beautiful women do no need makeup and all the extras hall the time. Hence naturally beautiful. I would say it’s a balance. Like to the bodega where them sweats if that’s in your heart. Maybe going grocery store or Walmart throw on the comfy dress.
@@kadimr.2894If a women doesn't naturally resort to wearing a dress but do it to catch a man's attention it's a facade. When se get comfortable in the relationship she'll resort back to wearing what she normally wear. Plastic!
You can get stylish track pants, etc... it's all about how you put yourself together. ... Ashley is right have your items stylish and comfortable so whatever you put on looks put together. Maybe get a stylish friend to help you put looks togeter.
I love this !!! I have gotten so many nasty looks or comments about why I put on clothes to do simple errands. But making it a habit to put myself together before leaving the house has boosted my confidence so much. Also, I’m a single woman I never know who I may bump into. Thanks for the convo these are the things grandmothers use to teach.
If it works for you keep doing it. It doesn't work for me all of the time so I don't dress up all of the time. I'm physically active a lot so I need practical sports clothing and a lot of it comes from the men's section! Most of it is black, blue or grey which are the colours men wear and it also makes laundry sorting easier. Sure I would love to dress like a fitness influencer but the majority of the clothing that they wear is not technically sound. It's for light gym exercises that you barely break a sweat in. I also wear practical swimwear because I don't want to worry about a boob, butt cheek or labia slipping out and scaring the elementary school kids at the local pool. A cute flowy maxi dress is something I'll wear on a date or to a summer soiree not my local grocery store where half the people are in their pajamas....and people say where I live is posh....(i.e. not too many lace fronts, 3 inch nails or Russian lashes but the housing is ridiculously expensive). These rich people who are not celebrities be walking around in loungewear at the supermarket while driving their BMWs, Porsches, Teslas, and Mercedes. At heart I'm an island girl...and island people do not care about any of that. We literally all wear the same thing regardless of class,- shorts, t-shirt and flipflops. There are dressier versions of this but it's the same. I have a friend who plays golf and he just finished playing a golf tournament and everyone else was in golf shoes and he was there in flip-flops. As soon as he came of the course he was back in flip flops. 🤣🙈
If you catch a man while wearing makeup, u gotta KEEP wearing the make-up for him... I believe in doing lite touches to my faces lashes , lip gloss , and of course having a bomb skin care regime, but alot of women look DIFFERENT DIFFERENT when they take that make-up off. Natural always wins!
People in the comments keep saying tge first girl doesn't need to do anything she's naturally pretty in sweats and a tee. But the look hasn't been working for her. The men might see her but they aren't approaching her. So should she keep doing something that hasn't been working or should she switch it up a bit. I believe when you feel good about how you look you attract people who think you you look good as well.
What she needs is a few outfits for different reasons like the grocery store outfit mentioned and ORGANIZE YOUR CLOSET WITH CERTAIN OUTFITS IN CERTAIN AREAS OF IT FOR DIFFERENT PURPOSES because it really does help. Example- night out date night sexy dresses are hung up in the back of closet and simple ready to go dresses that needs no ironing and etc are in the front.
Let me just say this, I put effort into being well put together for me. Because I feel good about myself when I take care of me. I agree with her that it’s a different type of man one attracts with sweats vs a nice casual dress or skirt .
All she needs is a tinted gloss and mascara. She's so pretty! And it's really easy to have a couple easy/cute dresses to throw on for errands. Or a great-fitting pair of jeans and a cute top. It will make you feel so confident wherever you go.
When the young lady said she has to get in the right head space she is unconsciously acknowledging there is an issue. It's something deeper when we don't put effort into our appearance.
I think she meant the extra added efforts...A beat face, is not the same as not brushing your teeth. She's talking about being jazzy when you are just running to the corner store. She's also talking about the entire concept around "effortless" which in reality is a lie. Most aesthetic habits take effort and people have varying degrees as to how much they want to put in, depending on the task.
No, I do get being in the right head space. I definitely identify with her with cute and comfort and just throwing it on. Some women make it look effortless, beat face and all. The more mindful I'm becoming of what I'm wearing, the easier it becomes. It definitely becomes a habit. Even small changes make a difference as well. No more just throwing it on unless I'm in the back yard.
The superficiality😭 I hate it here. I hate it so much. If you care to get dolled up and don’t have the energy, sure there’s a disconnect worth investigating. But if you genuinely don’t care, it’s fine. 🤦🏾♀️ it’s all so spiritually vacuous. Sweats, dress who caresssss😩
A lot of people deal with depression and don't even know it. Most just think they have developed this mindset of thinning is a new habit or they are just more comfortable. However I've learned that there's levels to depression and we have to understand that after Covid a lot of people slipped into without realizing it and they just think they feeding they self non sense. How you want to feel is what you really want to do but sometimes we just say I'm not feeling like it even though I want. Check your mental health EVERYDAY to make sure your mentally okay cause how you feel is how's you present yourself.
The girl with the curly hair is pretty. Honestly she looks better than the girl with the stiff bob, excessive face paint, and cartoon glasses. This girl is thinking she has to change her style and approach to her style and she doesn't. effortless works for her because shes so attractive already. I wonder how much work it took to maintain her curly hair. It prolly wasnt completely effortless.
@@fashionwithoutlabels the girl herself is pretty alone, but IN MY OPINION. the way she has styled herself looks clownish. notice I pointed out the things I did not like which are her make up, hair and exaggerated glasses. not her face or body or skin tone. It's not about being black. it's about the fact she feels the need to do all that and it just looks overdone and unattractive to me. I'm sure this girl is pretty under all this overcompensation too. she is telling this girl who looks totally fine that she must do more.... if more means look like her, I totally disagree. it's a video about LOOKS. I can state MY opinion on her looks! being black don't mean u can't have an opinion.
I think she's beautiful! I think it takes confidence to go out naturally and appropriate. I think insecurities send you to the store looking like “I need you to see me and what I’m working with.” Be yourself. That’s when you will attract the right and feel good attention that you deep down desire! I’m going to save the look for the first date, to show him, his reward for his confidence for respectfully approaching me ❤
I was just talking to a friend of mine about how I'm going to change my appearance and style. I was explaining how I need to change my wardrobe that way even when I throw on clothes I look like I put some thought into it. You literally just stated that in the first few minutes of the video. I'm glad to know I'm heading in the right direction.
I’m like the lady that called in. I don’t wear makeup most of the time and if I do it’s only eyeliner and I get called beautiful/pretty all the time. Me being called pretty while I’m not putting in effort has made me want to put in effort cause I’m like if dudes is hollering about me at the bare minimum imagine if I put in the work lol.
I’ve always been a fashion girly. I love to dress up and do my hair and makeup and I have a pretty unique style. I used to always want to wear things that flatter my figure and accentuate my best asserts. But this past year, I’m learning that I also enjoy the effortlessness of wearing whatever I want, regardless of if it think it’s flattering or not. There’s something about it that makes me feel more free in the moment, as opposed to thinking so hard about my appearance. Maybe that’s because all my life I dressed for the male gaze, but now I’m dressing to feel like a human, rather than something to be objectified. This is my personal experience. And this is not to say that wearing clothes that look and feel good on you is dressing for attention but for me, it was always in the back of my mind that people will know how good I look if I dress a certain way. I’m in my faze of just being in my body and not thinking about how I appear to others. It’s kinda like when you shave your head and have no choice but to stop worrying about judgement from others. It’s a good feeling.
Honestly, as long as we shower, dress to impress ourselves...men flock. I'm a tomboy at heart as well but girl, I dress comfortable but show my personality with it. If I want to wear sweatpants, I wear male-looking high waisted joggers with fun colors and enjoy my statment shirts. You can style your shirt up and down and pair with jewelry. I do love my dresses though... not because of the look but because it makes getting dressed easy lol. She needs to feel comfortable and confident in her outfit first and show her personality.😊
I think it's time, occasion, and priority. I'd rather have my health, body, mind, and behavior in good standing first instead of worrying about who sees me in my clean and simple clothing. Trust that what's for you will follow
Sometimes I get complimented on my looks whether it's my natural hair, my clothes or my shoes. Not too long ago, I was at the parking lot getting grocery bags out to shop and this older guy stopped his car and said "you look good", I said "Thank you." I don't even let these compliments gas my head up, I like that I'm acknowledged and don't even be expecting it. I try my best to put matching clothes together to go with the shoes. I do it to impress me and I look in the mirror before going out. Should I show my belly? Is this too dressy for a doctor's visit? Should I be casual to this type of event? Stuff like that.
SABRINA ABSOLUTELY AND A LOT OF TIMES IT'S SAD BECAUSE THESE WOMEN GO OUT LOOKING A MESS WITH THE BONNETS AND ALL KINDS OF FOOLISHNESS ON AND REFUSE TO LOOK PRESENTABLE SO WHEN THEY SEE A BEAUTIFUL WOMAN LOOKING FABULOUS THEY APPRECIATE THE SELF CARE AND AWARENESS OF HER APPEARANCE
so many of us (admitting or not) are like the woman who called in… i loved that a solution and starting point was given of just having 2-3 slip on running out the door dresses… another thing that has helped me, is having a makeup “tint” cream & mascara when im just not in the mood for a full face of makeup.. i need a hair solution lolol… 😂❤
I’m the total opposite of the woman who called in. I beat my face everyday, and I love a cute outfit🥰 I feel so good with my makeup done, hair nice, outfit clean and nice, along with my nails and toes done. You can’t tell me nothing😂😂 I just feel so good, I love getting ready it’s refreshing
Ofc you are getting laid. You are married... The lady here however wasn't asking how to dress for a man though, the host was the one who inserted that I'm the convo. BTW, getting laid is easy for both married and unmarried folks esp nowaday in this oversexualized culture.
It’s soo crazy but watching this was like a revelation for me. I recall reading someone speak about manifestation and being intentional in life. For example if you want to go on vacation or manifest a move, you arrange things in your everyday life, like small visuals to keep yourself in that mindset, ie you start cleaning up your space as if you’re going on vacation soon, start packing a suitcase and leave it by the door or somewhere where you can see it, etc. I immediately applied this to the idea of looking your best on a daily basis even when single. It’s like moving like you’re already in that relationship, like you got dressed for your man today, etc. That way, when that man comes into your life, he’s simply coming into your life and you coming into his, it’s a blending as opposed to an overhaul of your lifestyle. Operating from a place of, I’m already there and I don’t have to jump to change things when that day comes, I can put things into practice right now so it becomes second nature. Now I don’t advocate for the makeup and what not, we are beautiful in our natural state. But I definitely agree on shifting our perspective and implementing different things into our current daily routine that we would normally do in relationships, ie buying dresses like you suggested to the first woman, something so simple can go a long way and you feel more feminine and girly too.
I’m with the girl on the right. That’s my style & I’ve never had problems attracting men. As a matter of fact, when I do “dress up”, it often attracts the wrong energy which is why sweats is more comfortable than a dress. Plus we’re fly without all that shit lol. At the end of the day, dress for yourself. If they don’t like you, they’re not for you.
I love a good sweatpants and t shirt combo too. What I’ve done to make my look a bit more upscale is trade my sweatpants for linen pants and flowy tops or even t shirts that are thicker/better quality with no graphics, a good sandal and you’re good to go. Then you have that effortless, no makeup look.
I just found this video, and this is so me. I don't put a lot of effort in the way I dress unless I'm going somewhere special. It never fails that I see a handsome guy when I'm looking a mess.
I would wear booty shorts/sweatpants and T-shirts for 2years. Just recently this year I decided to put on a dress and sandles whenever I'm going out. Keep my nails done and hair retwisted (dreads). It really improved how I viewed myself and how others view me. A dress can be as comfortable as sweatpants atp.
This was definitely on time. I am in the same space as the guest and I’ve been trying to get out of this space. I’ve come up with a solution that I’ve started implementing and just taking it one day at a time.
@@True253 I have had the most men speak to me when I wasn't dressed up. I don't know why, but if a man likes what he sees, then he'll go for it. She just can't go after men who like a certain esthetic 🤷🏾♀️
@@neteruhathor Well I certainly don't think you are wrong. Yes, some guys will hit on girls still even when they're overweight as well. But I think it's important to acknowledge that just because a dude is willing to entertain you or sleep with you doesn't mean he's going to take you seriously, as in vetting you for marriage. And even if does, is it a high-quality dude? Likely not. Guys who have something going for themselves and who are attractive usually go for the best. I always say if you want to attract the best you need to be the best. Those are just my thoughts. Have a blessed day :)
Been with my dude for 10 years and I’m only 27 . I’ve never been into makeup or anything like that and never have had a problem getting any man’s attention .
The dressing part is easy it’s the shaving and waxing part that is cubersome. I’m a hairy girl and I want to put in a cute dress to go to the store but my legs would go from clean shaven at 8am to werewolf at 1pm. I need to find the energy to shave every day.
Oh the hairy legs can just ruin your cute dress ideas sometimes, I solve this by shaving once the stubble pops out, that way it’s not as time consuming as a full grown patch of grassland on my legs 😆 about every two days I run a swipe of my razor and I’m good to go.
If you cant keep up what ever look your trying to give, don't do it. But also don't complain if only certain types of men are attracted to you because of the way you present yourself. You only get out of life what you put into it, women seem to understand this concept when it comes to there careers, but for some reason yall think its ok to do the bare minimum when looking for a partner and still believe you should receive the best men society has to offer.
Many men prefer to meet women not glammed up, so they know what they'll wake up to in the morning. I've been approached the most when I'm dressed down. I do like to put on a little makeup daily, or even just lashes, because that's what I like. Don't just do it for a man..IMO
It’s a mindset. Looking nice is for you. How you dress is ultimately how you feel about yourself. Didn’t use to believe it but now I do. We put effort into everybody and everything else. Why not try a little bit with your appearance? When running errands, I wear cute workout clothes and a little foundation. Or a loose fitting dress with sandals (summer time) like Ashley said. Keep my nail done and do a little skin care every week…keeps me looking hydrated and healthy It’s not that serious. It’s quite simple. Care about how you look at all times, event at home!
Me too. Since Covid I work from home and can’t get past being comfy. I think about wearing regular clothes but then I think again and go for comfort. My hair is just in homemade twists so I look kinda homeless but I can’t seem to do better. 🙃
Idk how your channel ended up in my feed bc I don’t follow “femininity” coaches or “soft life” content but I’m glad the algorithm was gracious. I dress really well for work, events and of course when the occasion calls for it but in my everyday life I’m much the bball shorts and T-shirt kind of gal (my sis has been going at my neck for years but I’m stubborn lol)…. Anyway, thank you for your insight and advice bc even though I’ve kind of opted out of dating for now, I do recognize that I feel a lot better about myself when I look nice 😊
I can tell that you are giving this advice from a good space and you're not talking down to the women who called in. I'm going to revamp my wardrobe soon and I'll take these suggestions into account. Thank you for sharing these tips!
Men get fly for women and other men don’t bash them… Ashley, I love your content 😍😍 Let’s be real Vee and gorgeous and your scared of the competition ladies !! Y’all shame people who wear makeup, and shame women who don’t do enough! The everyday self-care will help her build habits that just is for her !!!! Vee you deserve to invest in you! Have fun ❤
Honestly she's already pretty. Some women do so much that they look like completely different people. This lady needs very little. I work out daily and keep myself neat but I'm not going to do all this stuff that makes people look unrecognizable when they're bare face.
Look how she it to heat her face to be beautiful You woke up like that aannnnd your energy is a vibe. My opinion a man would propose to you and love you genuinely for being authentically yourself before he would propose to ol’girl. You don’t have to be superficial to be classy.
These responses range from “I don’t care what people think of me” to “women who look nice get (g)raped, so I like being ugly”. Ashley is putting out positivity and it is being converted to negativity. Hold your head Ms Ashley. I see the struggle. 🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾
Gurl we don’t need makeup on your face everyday just chill yes be comfortable in yourself and your skin. Pick and choose for yourself hunni don’t overthink it!❤
Im with her. I only wear makeup going out, not for work and anything past lip gloss is glam for me 😂 Give me a pair of retro Js any day. I hate dresses.
I'm like the first woman I'm very comfortable but im attracting dirt balls I also have rbf. I notice just now when I went to the circle k for coffee in a dress I'm more approachable I feel more feminine and pretty and turning different type of heads thank you. I'm subscribing
Exactly, my daddy always said look presentable when you step out, because you don’t know who you will meet. If you are single, could be your husband to be, if you are a business person, you could meet a potential client ….. and that makes sense to me today.
God’s word says Women must not let their beauty be something external.. This new age modern thing is so corrupt … The lashes and the weave and the long nails and the make up is all bull crap. Natural beauty and the feminine, Godly spirit and aura you hold is most important.
I disagree with your interpretation of scripture. I believe that scripture is talking about the importance of internal beauty; not suggesting that our looks don’t matter. Queen Esther spent time getting glammed up, in addition to praying, before she approached the king on behalf of her people.
The lady on the right looks far better than the lady on the left and only one is dressed up 🤷🏾♀️ there’s beauty in simplicity and less is more. Looking over done up can sometimes look like you’re trying too hard. Nails, lashes, lace fronts, big glasses, skin tight clothing, strong perfumes, etc. Can just be too much tbh. Casual or sporty attire can be cute if done correctly and still attract quality men.
You dont need to bring down the other woman to uplift the other. Thats HER personal perspective and shes right. The type of effort you put into yourself is the type of people you will attract. If you look like you dont love yourself wearing stained clothes mix matched socks hair a mess you will attract a man that will treat you exactly how you present yourself. And as a woman having that stuff your nails and hair nails done is a HUGE confidence booster and puts the icing on the cake for a outfit and she also already said you can wear a cute workout fit and still make it look presentable. So you bringing her down yet praising someone who looks "simplistic" shows that you just walk out of the house any type of way.
Crazier part is the girl on the right ALSO unconsciously acknowledged she has self esteem issues. Thats straight proof that the way you dress and carry yourself is exactly how others will view you. Take care of yourself ladies
Agree to disagree. Girl on left looks way over done. At best she’ll probably get a ball player or a dusty disguised as HV. You’ll see that men are very simple and to carry yourself well and look put together doesn’t mean you have to be over the top or wearing pounds of makeup, lashes and nails. Do you see how the women actually winning in the dating/marriage game are usually what people call “plain janes” and not the baddie look type of chicks. It’s all in your energy and confidence. Slapping on a bodycon dress, contouring your nose, and putting on ten inch nails doesn’t automatically breed confidence. If your aura and energy is still off, that’ll still project in your interactions
@@rachelesmith3342 the "plain janes" that are so called "winning" are with men that dont invest in their women so they can continue to look like "plain janes" they are with the 50/50 men that cant fully provide and the women that look like they don't care for themselves or an "investment" attract that so yeah it makes sense that some men think "plain janes" are "winning" because they cannot afford a woman that looks like ashley. Ashley is the perfect example of feminine. She goes to the gym, she is self aware, she doesn't tolerate any b.s and knows what man she wants to attract. So no she wont attract just any man because she not only had high standards but is also self aware so you thinking she'll attract a dusty man or a ball player just because she holds herself to a high standard shows you have problems yourself. Men are not just "simple" creatures they are just visual... simple and visual are two different things. Men date by the situations they are in. If he is poor has low self esteem he will for for the girl on the right a high value man will go for ashley. She is kept up and knows her worth and value. Only masculine women think that just being "plain" and not caring for their appearance attracts a stable good man. That only attracts a man who sees "oh she doesnt have her nails done/ hair done i wont have to worry about keeping up her maintenance" he will see you and treat you exactly how you make yourself appear and the quicker you notice and learn this the better
@@rachelesmith3342 it's proof everywhere all on social media and in reality if you present yourself a certain way you will get that. You present yourself looking dusty a hot mess Thats exactly what you will get. You think lowly of yourself and dont put in any effort once so ever thats what yourself going to get just like you stated thats how energy works. You are what you attract. And the ones that have an issue with what shes saying not only have issues of their own but they dont think of themself as valuable enough to even care to do anything about their appearance. Wounded feminine and extremely masculine
I love Vee. And im happy to have met her on Tiktok. I do believe she will attract a certain type of man with her sweatpants because she already has a high percentage of masculinity to her. Not in a bad way. We are just more tomboyish. So by putting more effort in leaving the house and wearing a dress, I believe she will feel more soft. Consequently attracting the type of man Ashley is hinting at. This was good advice. She didnt call Vee ugly. She just kept it real. Your appearance can definitely make certain type of men shy away even if they think you’re a pretty plain jane.
Let me say this for the people in the back! I want to emphasize this point once again! Vee approached ME during my show to seek suggestions on how to enhance her natural beauty. She CHOSE to be on the show, I didn’t ask or BEG HER. We all know she is already beautiful, but she has been curious before about ways to enhance her appearance. This doesn't mean she needs loads of makeup, high heels, or revealing outfits. It's about making small changes that make her feel more confident and empowered. It's disappointing to see this turning into something it's not. Our focus is on positivity and supporting women. Let's not pit us against each other! Y’all want woman empowerment but y’all being mean girls in the comments and actually learning from my videos! Lord
I TOTALLY UNDERSTOOD YOU!!!!! I AM A VEE AND I STARTED DOING BETTER….NOW LISTENING TO YOU…..YOU CONFIRMED IT!!!! Thank you!!!!
Us women need to do whatever it takes meaning whatever works for you to feel confident....yes more effort for ourselves.
Worry not my sister, people will always talk. They say if people don’t talk about you, then you are dead, so you are very much alive and doing great things others can’t. Congratulations 🎉🎈🎊 Some are just negative beings. This is what we women need. I was really happy to come across your show, because as a woman it really bothers me to see women who are naturally beautiful, but step out and not care about their appearance. Please, keep this show going. I would also want more on women. We need to understand our bodies.😂👏🏽👍 it’s high time women learn to support each other by sharing views, fashion and many more.
You've always been positive and motivating. Keep doing the good work.
You did a great job and said nothing wrong the truth is just the truth. We are not going to change men they like what they like. Like men are not going to change us we want a man with some money, some substance … it is what it is!!!! you spoke nothing but the truth kudos to you.
She dont have on no makeup and is absolutely beautiful. I love those curls. She wont need to do much to turn heads. Men are starving for natural beauty without all the extras
True
No lies
Yes SIS is!! She doesn't have to do much!!
Yes agreed
Men really don’t give a damn. They’ll go after you dressed up or dressed down. It’s all about confidence.
I'm the woman who wore no makeup and dressed comfortably in sweats and men thought i had low self esteem. Now i do make up and make an effort to look decent and they think im stuck up.
Self love and confidence in yourself goes far 🥰
Love the advice btw
Same
I agree. I used to be the same, now that I’m a little older I make sure even when I’m going to the store at night I’m looking decent. For example, at night: no make up but moisturized face,cute sandals, cute clothes, hair done, clean. And yes I do a mirror check before I leave. The older women I admire, those are the ones I imitate and set the example for my girls. Always slay when you’re not sick. Also, Keep your health your priority. Being Healthy is Being Wealthy.
Can not win! It is the men not us
Moral of the story you can't win....sad
@aqueenceereid4249 No, the moral is love yourself and don't look for validation of others 🥰
Until “looking good” protects women from being abused, cheated on, gaslit, and taken for granted… you can’t convince me of any reason to ever factor them in to my fashion choices. They are, quite literally, never worth the effort. Do it for yourself…. That’s it… that’s all…
This !!!!
I wholeheartedly agree. Women have to find value in a higher source. Men can look dusty, but women MUST stay fashionable and attractive at all times. Until women start defining who they actually are, the world will never respect us. We are more than just beautiful objects.
Figure out what type of man you want to approach you then dress the way that man will attract. You can't look dusty and expect to attract a high quality man. I stay leveled up when ever I leave the house to keep the dusties away. It will protect you.
@@goddessinfinity1 I look my best EVERY time I leave the house… hell, I look cute INside the house… but that’s for me…. For my own satisfaction. That’s how my Mama raised me.
I think I must not have communicated my point, so let me try again….
I couldn’t care less about them being attracted to me….☺️I’m not thinking about “what kind of man I want”….. what I “want” is for all of their a$$es to leave me TF alone as I cultivate the type of life I love to live…
@@lisakimberle That part. This idea that I’m supposed to always be mindful of how I look SIMPLY to dictate how these degenerate MF’s behave is beyond ridiculous…. I look good because that’s how I like to look…. Period.
Her real dilemma is shes naturally pretty. She looks good as she is. Not everybody can do this
Exactly when you are that pretty you feel you don’t need to do too much
I disagree. She doesn’t have to be glammed up to get a man’s attention because she’s already naturally beautiful. She just needs to date strategically and increase her numbers of potential suitors that’ll value her for her.
This……all of this!!!!!! I lived in a small suburban town for five years and I never saw those women glammed up yet they bagged wealthy high earning men and lived in huge beautiful houses and this was their second marriage and they came with kids from the previous marriage….oh and they were white women. The black community does too much and requires women to be unicorns when they don’t have to do any of that they simply need to get around better groups of people cause what they’re doing ain’t working.
Unfortunately men as visual.
@@iAMJM27 yea but all women with makeup and without aren’t the same. Lizzo with makeup versus Beyoncé with makeup, who do you think more men with choose? Gabrielle Union without makeup versus Wendy Williams with makeup, who do you think more men will choose?
@@mothershipother1425 Hey, im on your side. Just stating the unfortunate fact.
@@christinag1998 Yea, life ain’t fair :/
To me it’s all about accessories. A graphic T-shirt and jeans can give the effort, effortless look if you wear the right accessories : cute sandal or loafer, crossbody bag, bold necklace, dainty earrings, your favorite fragrance 🤷🏾♀️
It’s can be as simply as you make it.
All of those things look cheap
This is my go to. Graphic tee, jeans, either sneakers or sandals, cross body bag, cool earrings, nails polished (my natural nails) and a nice fragrance. Sometimes I literally have to speed walk out of places when I don't feel like being approached lol. I agree that it's as simple as you make it. It's not so much what's on you but what's in you. Confidence is everything 💜
@@PlaywithDaisyin your opinion, some ppl like the look.
@@PlaywithDaisylook cheap? have you ever been to Soho NYC? lol
@@ToriUptown it’s not about where you bought your items. It’s about the quality of the items you bought.
If she’s comfortable in her own skin without the extras she will continue to be ok looking “natural”. I’ve tried fixing up and doing all the things but after I do it; it doesn’t fulfill me or make me happier. I’m extremely happy with being natural and I think this woman is as well. She’s doesn’t need all the additions. She’s naturally pretty. I’ve seen and met a lot of people who are beautiful without the extras; but they chose to get dolled up any way. It really just depends on the person.
Well said! My thoughts exactly! 👏🏾👏🏾
I agree as I’ve been trying to enhance my own appearance, but I don’t get any “look good, feel good” behind it. The only thing I notice that changes is how people respond to me. I myself don’t change how I feel/act when I “dress up”. My mindset was also why am I dressing up, to impress who, why do I care what they think about me, but I’ve been listening in on these conversations quite often lately. I’m trying to beat it in my head that I need to look better. the world is going to judge you regardless. even though I don’t believe in “first impressions”, many like to front, I’m more intrigued by conversing than appearances. She’s naturally beautiful, I think every woman is, and we shouldn’t be judged based on appearance but it is the way of the world. Men will feed off your feminine energy when you “dress up” in good and bad ways. But I feel like men who appreciate a woman at her regular (even if not all the time), are just different. *sidenote: I also researched that “more attractive” people have higher health outcomes…
Ok yes bc I am a comfortable girl and now that I just had a baby I a extra comfortable but I Feel like I have to do extra bc I have a daughter and I want my daughter to be more high maintenance than me I don’t have trouble finding a man in Bball shorts I am good with men so I know how to get that male attention but I don’t want my daughter to be like me I want her to be more girly so that it will come more naturally for her to dress up bc for me it’s just too much I might be able to do it for a wedding or event but not everyday it just feels stupid for me to dress up sometimes but I am trying for my daughter
I agree with you, I don't wear makeup either. It's just not something that interests me. I don't think it's necessary for everyone, everyone has a preference.
Yes, we’ll said.
She is beautiful. She doesn't need to do much to dress it up. Those curls...Love.
Looking like your best self daily (whether in glam, chic, athletic or comfy wear) is a necessity for YOUR SELF WORTH. When we look good we feel good
Not true at all. Alot of people are out here faking the funk and crying real tears behind closed doors
@@gamingmom6164You’re talking about the outliers. On average, a person who is healed, when dressed in something nice feels even better.
Perfect comment
I wish the conversation was more about being cute for yourself instead of being cute for a mate. I find that when you look good, you are more approachable and you get to have better interactions in general.
I do like that they talked about the balance between comfort and presentation. I think it’s important to present yourself in a way that makes you feel comfortable to be approached by anyone. That can look like different things for different people.
I agree. I think the message will be better received if we take doing it for men out of it and focus on self development.
But marriage is an important part of our lives. Why deny that we should put effort into that area to please one another. God made us for eachother. As a society we have become so anti-men!
@@jada-roshaybethea5350 I agree that in marriage you should consider how you show up for your significant other. If I’m understanding correctly, the woman in the video is single, no?
That is the reason I wish it was more about how you show up for yourself instead of to get a man. Once you get married, please know that your man is going to desire what you presented to get him.
I am not anti-man. Married 15 years to an amazing man. I actually think it’s quite strange that men and women are at odds on the Internet lol
Apperance is so much more than just attracting attention is shows how you feel about yourself as well. If you just walk around and slap just anything on your body and dont try to look nice for even yourself that says and shows alot about how you feel about yourself. Take care of yourself ladies! The more effort you put into your appearance the more you'll love yourself!
I agree 100%
I disagree.
@@Nwakaego_ if you get dressed up for other people rather than yourself you got some healing to do. If you cant even put in the effort to give yourself the bare minimum of looking decent for yourself and feel good about yourself dont know what to tell you other than go heal and learn to love yourself
@@Nwakaego_ anyone with common sense knows that people who project not just confidence but self love look ALOT more presentable and clean and very well put together vs someone who would disagree just saying
Hi @Virtues444 it’s bold of you to assume that someone isn’t “healed” because they disagreed with the context of your comment. Everyone isn’t broken out here. I’m perfectly healed and happy. I do still disagree with the context of your comment. Have a wonderful day!😁
I think what would work based on what Ashley said in the first few minutes is that you can create a capsule wardrobe so that you still look great but you don't have to put effort into thinking about every single outfit.
🎯
yesssss!!! thank you for this!
Agreed!!! 🙌🏾
She's naturally gorgeous! She only needs to address her attire.
Many of these women are doing entirely too much. I swear, you can't tell the difference between transgender men and real women any more.
The thick layers of makeup, the 2-inch bat lashes, heavy gloss w/ excessive weaves, are from the vogue "trans" area.
I honestly didn't realize until a gentleman friend kindly pointed this out to me.
For me now, less is more!
😅
You are 100% correct. The trans women, and the women who wear thick, heavy make up, tarantula lashes, and falcon talon nails, really do look the same. I don’t understand why women emulate the drag queen aesthetic, because they are women. I can understand men plastering themselves with fakeness, in order to emulate women, because they’re men.
Less really is more. I’m glad I’m of the generation where women use make up to enhance their beauty.
Natural beauty is a conscious decision and action. Maintaining healthy, glowing skin, healthy natural hair and nails, whilst maintaining a healthy weight and toned body are signs of a woman taking very good care of herself.
It’s easy to glue hair, nails and lashes onto your body, whilst the natural you is sub par. I thought the woman looked glowing and healthy and pretty. All she has to do is choose her wardrobe purposely, to suit her lifestyle.
I feel the same the natural honey is what men will be most attracted to becauss you really cant tell the difference. Heavy makeup is for clowns and the dead and like you said trans. Men need to see the difference.
BEEN MARRIED FOR 35 YEARS AND THIS WOMAN IS RIGHT !!😊
The most important thing is to flow from your spirit not to put on an outfit/exterior. If you’re doing it to catch a man, you will not be able to sustain it and it won’t really be you.
Agree! Though she didn't mention me until the host did.
It doesn't matter what you look like. If you get glammed up or not or how well you take care of yourself. These men are not worth it. If you dress up or fix yourself up make sure that you're doing it because you want too. Not for a man because even if you get approached by a man 9 times out of 10 he's with someone else. He's dealing with someone else. Staying single and unapproachable is ok.
SABRINA I NEED YOU TO SAY THAT LAST PART LOUD AF ABOUT THE LOOKING GOOD FOR YOURSELF AND NOT A MAN IT'S SAD THAT WHEN A WOMAN LOVES HERSELF AND HOW SHE CARRIES HERSELF ITS ALWAYS WHO ARE YOU TRYING TO LOOK CUTE FOR LMAOOO LIKE MY DAMN SELF DEF NOT INTERESTED IN THESE CHOICES OF MEN NOWADAYS🤢🤢🤢🤢😂😂😂😂😂😂😂💅💅💅💅
Yessssss. That part.
don’t let that be your mindset sis , you will continue to attract the ones that ain’t worth it if you just assume they all ain’t shit.
Preach! These male worshipping Pickme’s get on my nerve! Put the effort into how you show up FOR YOU! These Dusty’s are not worth it! Stop coaching wm to believe they NEED a man!🤦🏽♀️
@@emsyourlifeall she said was women love yourself, don’t live for men …
Wow, she’s so naturally pretty!
She's a natural beautiful woman. I'm all for her staying natural in her looks. I've also learned to appreciate putting a little thought into clothing. I'm a sweats girl myself, but I have noticed that if I simply put on a little flowy dress (nothing sexy at all) just to run to the grocery store, it does make a difference. Men are visual. The average man loves to see women be womanly. There's nothing wrong with that. It's the same for women (at least for me) love to see a man be manly. 🙂
People are visual. What one wears to the club does not an interview outfit make. That being said, there is nothing new about this conversation, which sneakily pits women against each other for their willingness to
conform to what men say is feminine. If we learned about marketing, we would really not be confused about this at all. A woman is a woman is a woman 24/7. We have been duped into peacocking for men when it’s the reverse for every other species. 😂
@@cmg25It's not just men, women treat me better as well when I put effort into how I'm dressed. I've received tons of benefits just from throwing on a little 25 dollar Amazon midi dress to run my errands in, instead of sweats or jeans and a t-shirt. In my opinion it's in our best interest to look put together, so we can receive all the perks and benefits that we can, but I understand it's not a popular opinion.
@@cmg25 preach!!
@@cmg25 Lol!@peacocking. In my normal life, I'm too busy to be thinking about men and looking nice. I go for all practicality. I cycle, hike, swim, do a manual job and play women's soccer-football. We are getting sweaty, dirty, wet, muddy and a ball to the face or boob or falling on our asses. We do not be looking pretty! But I'll tell you that when I do dress up, it's nice to see the men completely speechless, their jaws on the floor and their eyes bulging. Lol! I go to bars and clubs and restaurants and social events where I do dress up but doing that every day is way too much when I'm more focused on my health and wealth. Even if women do this to get married to a man what happens when you have kids and they are constantly throwing up and pooping and peeing on you?..in public..Most husbands I know do not dress up to go to the grocery store. They have one child in the stroller, the other child on their shoulders and are in shorts, a hoodie a t-shirt, and crocs..Lol! The single dads get more time to look after themselves but the dads that live with their kids and the mom 24/7 do not have that time.
I honestly think she looks fine. She’s naturally pretty. Her hair is beautiful and looks styled and clean. Her skin is clear, radiant and looks clean with little to no makeup. Nails look clean. She’s wearing jewelry. She said she knows how to do it up for special occasions like recitals and dates. She’s fine. I think there’s very few men who would have an issue with her dressing like so to go to the supermarket. Most millionaire celebrities and models look like she does while going to the supermarket. If she wants to put in more effort for herself then sure. But I don’t think she has to change a thing about her appearance to get a good quality man.
If you stay ready you don’t have to get ready!
Well…..it weeds out the fakes and shallow hearted….this is how I look on the real. Plastic attracts plastic. Nothing wrong with improving your looks…..absolutely, self care and love is a must, but real is real.
❤ Facts
How does a dress instead of sweatpants = plastic?
@@kadimr.2894these people are crazy
I agree because if you’re not going keep that up. At least attract a man that is okay with how you dress. I will add this caveat. Naturally beautiful women do no need makeup and all the extras hall the time. Hence naturally beautiful. I would say it’s a balance. Like to the bodega where them sweats if that’s in your heart. Maybe going grocery store or Walmart throw on the comfy dress.
@@kadimr.2894If a women doesn't naturally resort to wearing a dress but do it to catch a man's attention it's a facade. When se get comfortable in the relationship she'll resort back to wearing what she normally wear. Plastic!
You can get stylish track pants, etc... it's all about how you put yourself together. ... Ashley is right have your items stylish and comfortable so whatever you put on looks put together. Maybe get a stylish friend to help you put looks togeter.
A cute flowy maxi dress & a simple, 5-minute makeup routine can make all the difference!
❗️
Yeah then my face broken out for the next week😩
I love this !!! I have gotten so many nasty looks or comments about why I put on clothes to do simple errands. But making it a habit to put myself together before leaving the house has boosted my confidence so much. Also, I’m a single woman I never know who I may bump into. Thanks for the convo these are the things grandmothers use to teach.
If it works for you keep doing it. It doesn't work for me all of the time so I don't dress up all of the time. I'm physically active a lot so I need practical sports clothing and a lot of it comes from the men's section! Most of it is black, blue or grey which are the colours men wear and it also makes laundry sorting easier. Sure I would love to dress like a fitness influencer but the majority of the clothing that they wear is not technically sound. It's for light gym exercises that you barely break a sweat in. I also wear practical swimwear because I don't want to worry about a boob, butt cheek or labia slipping out and scaring the elementary school kids at the local pool. A cute flowy maxi dress is something I'll wear on a date or to a summer soiree not my local grocery store where half the people are in their pajamas....and people say where I live is posh....(i.e. not too many lace fronts, 3 inch nails or Russian lashes but the housing is ridiculously expensive). These rich people who are not celebrities be walking around in loungewear at the supermarket while driving their BMWs, Porsches, Teslas, and Mercedes. At heart I'm an island girl...and island people do not care about any of that. We literally all wear the same thing regardless of class,- shorts, t-shirt and flipflops. There are dressier versions of this but it's the same. I have a friend who plays golf and he just finished playing a golf tournament and everyone else was in golf shoes and he was there in flip-flops. As soon as he came of the course he was back in flip flops. 🤣🙈
If you catch a man while wearing makeup, u gotta KEEP wearing the make-up for him... I believe in doing lite touches to my faces lashes , lip gloss , and of course having a bomb skin care regime, but alot of women look DIFFERENT DIFFERENT when they take that make-up off. Natural always wins!
People in the comments keep saying tge first girl doesn't need to do anything she's naturally pretty in sweats and a tee. But the look hasn't been working for her. The men might see her but they aren't approaching her. So should she keep doing something that hasn't been working or should she switch it up a bit. I believe when you feel good about how you look you attract people who think you you look good as well.
What she needs is a few outfits for different reasons like the grocery store outfit mentioned and ORGANIZE YOUR CLOSET WITH CERTAIN OUTFITS IN CERTAIN AREAS OF IT FOR DIFFERENT PURPOSES because it really does help. Example- night out date night sexy dresses are hung up in the back of closet and simple ready to go dresses that needs no ironing and etc are in the front.
Let me just say this, I put effort into being well put together for me. Because I feel good about myself when I take care of me. I agree with her that it’s a different type of man one attracts with sweats vs a nice casual dress or skirt .
All she needs is a tinted gloss and mascara. She's so pretty! And it's really easy to have a couple easy/cute dresses to throw on for errands. Or a great-fitting pair of jeans and a cute top. It will make you feel so confident wherever you go.
When the young lady said she has to get in the right head space she is unconsciously acknowledging there is an issue. It's something deeper when we don't put effort into our appearance.
I think she meant the extra added efforts...A beat face, is not the same as not brushing your teeth. She's talking about being jazzy when you are just running to the corner store. She's also talking about the entire concept around "effortless" which in reality is a lie. Most aesthetic habits take effort and people have varying degrees as to how much they want to put in, depending on the task.
No, I do get being in the right head space. I definitely identify with her with cute and comfort and just throwing it on. Some women make it look effortless, beat face and all. The more mindful I'm becoming of what I'm wearing, the easier it becomes. It definitely becomes a habit. Even small changes make a difference as well. No more just throwing it on unless I'm in the back yard.
Therapy is the answer!
@@Sweetheart0189 this therapist agrees 100%
The superficiality😭 I hate it here. I hate it so much. If you care to get dolled up and don’t have the energy, sure there’s a disconnect worth investigating. But if you genuinely don’t care, it’s fine.
🤦🏾♀️ it’s all so spiritually vacuous. Sweats, dress who caresssss😩
But when you naturally have it, you don’t have to do all that! When it’s in you but not on you👌
💜💜
Fact!!!!
this that bull. You guys aren’t any better than women who wear makeup or dress up. Some just want to look good.
A lot of people deal with depression and don't even know it. Most just think they have developed this mindset of thinning is a new habit or they are just more comfortable. However I've learned that there's levels to depression and we have to understand that after Covid a lot of people slipped into without realizing it and they just think they feeding they self non sense. How you want to feel is what you really want to do but sometimes we just say I'm not feeling like it even though I want. Check your mental health EVERYDAY to make sure your mentally okay cause how you feel is how's you present yourself.
Here we go with another internet educated therapist.
@Cymplicity-yd2lo they're not lying. Why would you not care about your presentation?
The girl with the curly hair is pretty. Honestly she looks better than the girl with the stiff bob, excessive face paint, and cartoon glasses. This girl is thinking she has to change her style and approach to her style and she doesn't. effortless works for her because shes so attractive already. I wonder how much work it took to maintain her curly hair. It prolly wasnt completely effortless.
Stop putting women looks against each other…thats the problem with black women now. Both are pretty in their OWN way.
@@fashionwithoutlabelsThank you for this response cuzzzz
@@fashionwithoutlabels the girl herself is pretty alone, but IN MY OPINION. the way she has styled herself looks clownish. notice I pointed out the things I did not like which are her make up, hair and exaggerated glasses. not her face or body or skin tone. It's not about being black. it's about the fact she feels the need to do all that and it just looks overdone and unattractive to me. I'm sure this girl is pretty under all this overcompensation too. she is telling this girl who looks totally fine that she must do more.... if more means look like her, I totally disagree. it's a video about LOOKS. I can state MY opinion on her looks! being black don't mean u can't have an opinion.
@@TEWMUCH chile i dont read long paragraphs, my attention span aint that good…but have a nice day 😁
No one told her she has to beat her face but instead look a little more put together. Lipgloss and mascaras never hurt anyone.
I think she's beautiful! I think it takes confidence to go out naturally and appropriate. I think insecurities send you to the store looking like “I need you to see me and what I’m working with.” Be yourself. That’s when you will attract the right and feel good attention that you deep down desire! I’m going to save the look for the first date, to show him, his reward for his confidence for respectfully approaching me ❤
I agree with Ashley - Men are VISUAL
I was just talking to a friend of mine about how I'm going to change my appearance and style. I was explaining how I need to change my wardrobe that way even when I throw on clothes I look like I put some thought into it. You literally just stated that in the first few minutes of the video. I'm glad to know I'm heading in the right direction.
I’m like the lady that called in. I don’t wear makeup most of the time and if I do it’s only eyeliner and I get called beautiful/pretty all the time. Me being called pretty while I’m not putting in effort has made me want to put in effort cause I’m like if dudes is hollering about me at the bare minimum imagine if I put in the work lol.
That’s true
Exactly! Love you 😍
I feel the same I can attract good quality men without all the extra they actually appreciate me more
Some people need more make up than another’s need🤷🏾♀️🤷🏾♀️🤷🏾♀️ energy and swag definitely matter
I’ve always been a fashion girly. I love to dress up and do my hair and makeup and I have a pretty unique style. I used to always want to wear things that flatter my figure and accentuate my best asserts. But this past year, I’m learning that I also enjoy the effortlessness of wearing whatever I want, regardless of if it think it’s flattering or not. There’s something about it that makes me feel more free in the moment, as opposed to thinking so hard about my appearance. Maybe that’s because all my life I dressed for the male gaze, but now I’m dressing to feel like a human, rather than something to be objectified. This is my personal experience. And this is not to say that wearing clothes that look and feel good on you is dressing for attention but for me, it was always in the back of my mind that people will know how good I look if I dress a certain way. I’m in my faze of just being in my body and not thinking about how I appear to others. It’s kinda like when you shave your head and have no choice but to stop worrying about judgement from others. It’s a good feeling.
Well said.
Same.
Honestly, as long as we shower, dress to impress ourselves...men flock. I'm a tomboy at heart as well but girl, I dress comfortable but show my personality with it.
If I want to wear sweatpants, I wear male-looking high waisted joggers with fun colors and enjoy my statment shirts. You can style your shirt up and down and pair with jewelry. I do love my dresses though... not because of the look but because it makes getting dressed easy lol. She needs to feel comfortable and confident in her outfit first and show her personality.😊
This lady is absolutely gorgeous WITHOUT makeup! So I can’t relate … 🤷🏽♀️
Seriously she’s so gorgeous!❤
Yes tf you CAN!
I think it's time, occasion, and priority. I'd rather have my health, body, mind, and behavior in good standing first instead of worrying about who sees me in my clean and simple clothing. Trust that what's for you will follow
Sometimes I get complimented on my looks whether it's my natural hair, my clothes or my shoes. Not too long ago, I was at the parking lot getting grocery bags out to shop and this older guy stopped his car and said "you look good", I said "Thank you." I don't even let these compliments gas my head up, I like that I'm acknowledged and don't even be expecting it. I try my best to put matching clothes together to go with the shoes. I do it to impress me and I look in the mirror before going out. Should I show my belly? Is this too dressy for a doctor's visit? Should I be casual to this type of event? Stuff like that.
SABRINA ABSOLUTELY AND A LOT OF TIMES IT'S SAD BECAUSE THESE WOMEN GO OUT LOOKING A MESS WITH THE BONNETS AND ALL KINDS OF FOOLISHNESS ON AND REFUSE TO LOOK PRESENTABLE SO WHEN THEY SEE A BEAUTIFUL WOMAN LOOKING FABULOUS THEY APPRECIATE THE SELF CARE AND AWARENESS OF HER APPEARANCE
@@meka8953 😊🥰😊 I understand.
You respect and love yourself!
The woman in the right with no makeup looks just as pretty as interviewer without trying … I’m sure men notice her either way
Yet she's single
so many of us (admitting or not) are like the woman who called in… i loved that a solution and starting point was given of just having 2-3 slip on running out the door dresses… another thing that has helped me, is having a makeup “tint” cream & mascara when im just not in the mood for a full face of makeup.. i need a hair solution lolol… 😂❤
❤❤
😇💕👌🏾Thanks for the tint cream tip! What’s a good brand?😇💕👌🏾
For hair, braids or short hair.
A bun is always timeless. Slick your hair back and go🤗
I’m the total opposite of the woman who called in. I beat my face everyday, and I love a cute outfit🥰 I feel so good with my makeup done, hair nice, outfit clean and nice, along with my nails and toes done. You can’t tell me nothing😂😂 I just feel so good, I love getting ready it’s refreshing
I love clothes and getting dolled up when I’m actually doing something or going somewhere with some type of importance
I’ll never understand this. I’m married and I wear whatever tf I want and I’m still getting laid 🤷🏻♀️
Ofc you are getting laid. You are married... The lady here however wasn't asking how to dress for a man though, the host was the one who inserted that I'm the convo. BTW, getting laid is easy for both married and unmarried folks esp nowaday in this oversexualized culture.
Quality.
Same sis
The best effort is to do it naturally and she already got it I hope to God she sees this message.
She is absolutely drop dead gorgeous the way she is. The specific guy she will find in sweats is one that will love her for her.
It’s soo crazy but watching this was like a revelation for me. I recall reading someone speak about manifestation and being intentional in life. For example if you want to go on vacation or manifest a move, you arrange things in your everyday life, like small visuals to keep yourself in that mindset, ie you start cleaning up your space as if you’re going on vacation soon, start packing a suitcase and leave it by the door or somewhere where you can see it, etc. I immediately applied this to the idea of looking your best on a daily basis even when single. It’s like moving like you’re already in that relationship, like you got dressed for your man today, etc. That way, when that man comes into your life, he’s simply coming into your life and you coming into his, it’s a blending as opposed to an overhaul of your lifestyle. Operating from a place of, I’m already there and I don’t have to jump to change things when that day comes, I can put things into practice right now so it becomes second nature. Now I don’t advocate for the makeup and what not, we are beautiful in our natural state. But I definitely agree on shifting our perspective and implementing different things into our current daily routine that we would normally do in relationships, ie buying dresses like you suggested to the first woman, something so simple can go a long way and you feel more feminine and girly too.
I’m with the girl on the right. That’s my style & I’ve never had problems attracting men. As a matter of fact, when I do “dress up”, it often attracts the wrong energy which is why sweats is more comfortable than a dress. Plus we’re fly without all that shit lol. At the end of the day, dress for yourself. If they don’t like you, they’re not for you.
This
I love a good sweatpants and t shirt combo too. What I’ve done to make my look a bit more upscale is trade my sweatpants for linen pants and flowy tops or even t shirts that are thicker/better quality with no graphics, a good sandal and you’re good to go. Then you have that effortless, no makeup look.
The lady is naturally beautiful her being comfortable is not a problem she’s beautiful ❤
I just found this video, and this is so me. I don't put a lot of effort in the way I dress unless I'm going somewhere special. It never fails that I see a handsome guy when I'm looking a mess.
Sis is an unencumbered beauty. All the accoutrements are unnecessary. Curls just over there poppin🤩
She’s naturally beautiful. If she were to do anything, maybe some mascara to make her eyes pop but otherwise, she looks good.
Baby mascara can go such a long way.
@@cassius4177 yes!! It’s definitely my go to
@@cassius4177yes, most of us look tired without it. I guess that's why women love lashes so much.
I would wear booty shorts/sweatpants and T-shirts for 2years. Just recently this year I decided to put on a dress and sandles whenever I'm going out. Keep my nails done and hair retwisted (dreads). It really improved how I viewed myself and how others view me. A dress can be as comfortable as sweatpants atp.
Because men are visual doll. She is already pretty and a simple flowy dress would only enhance her.😊
I love all those women that came on today. They were so honest and so real. Not faking for the Internet and their beauty shines through.
This was definitely on time. I am in the same space as the guest and I’ve been trying to get out of this space. I’ve come up with a solution that I’ve started implementing and just taking it one day at a time.
Find a man who likes you for you girl. Don't bait and switch..💯
But the problem with that is a man won't even bother talking to you if he doesn't like what he sees. Men are visual. You have to put in some effort.
@@True253 I have had the most men speak to me when I wasn't dressed up. I don't know why, but if a man likes what he sees, then he'll go for it. She just can't go after men who like a certain esthetic 🤷🏾♀️
@@neteruhathor Well I certainly don't think you are wrong. Yes, some guys will hit on girls still even when they're overweight as well. But I think it's important to acknowledge that just because a dude is willing to entertain you or sleep with you doesn't mean he's going to take you seriously, as in vetting you for marriage. And even if does, is it a high-quality dude? Likely not. Guys who have something going for themselves and who are attractive usually go for the best. I always say if you want to attract the best you need to be the best. Those are just my thoughts. Have a blessed day :)
@@True253 you as well😊
The host looks so stylish and futuristic 💎
Been with my dude for 10 years and I’m only 27 . I’ve never been into makeup or anything like that and never have had a problem getting any man’s attention .
The dressing part is easy it’s the shaving and waxing part that is cubersome. I’m a hairy girl and I want to put in a cute dress to go to the store but my legs would go from clean shaven at 8am to werewolf at 1pm. I need to find the energy to shave every day.
Oh the hairy legs can just ruin your cute dress ideas sometimes, I solve this by shaving once the stubble pops out, that way it’s not as time consuming as a full grown patch of grassland on my legs 😆 about every two days I run a swipe of my razor and I’m good to go.
Would it be possible for you to look into laser hair removal? It’s a bit of an investment but it should save you a lot of time in the long run
I love how Ashley said THAT you gotta have grocery store outfits + you need to look ATTRACTIVE to ATTRACT a guy
If you cant keep up what ever look your trying to give, don't do it. But also don't complain if only certain types of men are attracted to you because of the way you present yourself. You only get out of life what you put into it, women seem to understand this concept when it comes to there careers, but for some reason yall think its ok to do the bare minimum when looking for a partner and still believe you should receive the best men society has to offer.
I get the guest👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾It’s hard to be real in a world made of plastic…
this woman reminds me of so much, i love being comfortable but im learning to jazz it up a bit
omgosh the interaction between you and the last beautiful young lady who came on was everything, it made me smile so big!
Judge Lynn Toler didn't do all of this stuff people advised but had someone extremely good to her.
Many men prefer to meet women not glammed up, so they know what they'll wake up to in the morning. I've been approached the most when I'm dressed down. I do like to put on a little makeup daily, or even just lashes, because that's what I like. Don't just do it for a man..IMO
YES Ashley is giving me EDNA! 😍🔥🔥🔥
Ashley I love your advice, it’s really made me upgrade not just my thinking but the way I take care of myself overall ❤️🔥❤️🔥❤️🔥
It’s a mindset. Looking nice is for you. How you dress is ultimately how you feel about yourself. Didn’t use to believe it but now I do. We put effort into everybody and everything else. Why not try a little bit with your appearance?
When running errands, I wear cute workout clothes and a little foundation. Or a loose fitting dress with sandals (summer time) like Ashley said. Keep my nail done and do a little skin care every week…keeps me looking hydrated and healthy
It’s not that serious. It’s quite simple. Care about how you look at all times, event at home!
I stumbled across this channel..and I'm total this lady in the video..my wardrobe is literally leggings and graphic tees. And love to be comfortable
Me too. Since Covid I work from home and can’t get past being comfy. I think about wearing regular clothes but then I think again and go for comfort. My hair is just in homemade twists so I look kinda homeless but I can’t seem to do better. 🙃
I love THISSSS interaction between my sisters
Thanks for the soft, kind delivery to encourage them❤ I’m going to follow you!!!!
I agree it matters how we show up in the world.
The one with no makeup looks so much better. She has natural beauty. And without makeup still outshines the other.
I like the way Ashley speaks. It sounds encouraging rather than humiliating. The lady with the curls is a natural beauty.
Idk how your channel ended up in my feed bc I don’t follow “femininity” coaches or “soft life” content but I’m glad the algorithm was gracious. I dress really well for work, events and of course when the occasion calls for it but in my everyday life I’m much the bball shorts and T-shirt kind of gal (my sis has been going at my neck for years but I’m stubborn lol)…. Anyway, thank you for your insight and advice bc even though I’ve kind of opted out of dating for now, I do recognize that I feel a lot better about myself when I look nice 😊
She’s drop dead and naturally beautiful.
I can tell that you are giving this advice from a good space and you're not talking down to the women who called in. I'm going to revamp my wardrobe soon and I'll take these suggestions into account. Thank you for sharing these tips!
Men get fly for women and other men don’t bash them…
Ashley, I love your content 😍😍
Let’s be real Vee and gorgeous and your scared of the competition ladies !! Y’all shame people who wear makeup, and shame women who don’t do enough!
The everyday self-care will help her build habits that just is for her !!!! Vee you deserve to invest in you! Have fun ❤
Honestly she's already pretty. Some women do so much that they look like completely different people. This lady needs very little. I work out daily and keep myself neat but I'm not going to do all this stuff that makes people look unrecognizable when they're bare face.
Look how she it to heat her face to be beautiful
You woke up like that aannnnd your energy is a vibe. My opinion a man would propose to you and love you genuinely for being authentically yourself before he would propose to ol’girl. You don’t have to be superficial to be classy.
She's beautiful! Her skin and curls are beautiful.
These responses range from “I don’t care what people think of me” to “women who look nice get (g)raped, so I like being ugly”. Ashley is putting out positivity and it is being converted to negativity. Hold your head Ms Ashley. I see the struggle. 🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾
Gurl we don’t need makeup on your face everyday just chill yes be comfortable in yourself and your skin. Pick and choose for yourself hunni don’t overthink it!❤
Im with her. I only wear makeup going out, not for work and anything past lip gloss is glam for me 😂 Give me a pair of retro Js any day. I hate dresses.
I only wear dressing when going somewhere special
I'm like the first woman I'm very comfortable but im attracting dirt balls I also have rbf. I notice just now when I went to the circle k for coffee in a dress I'm more approachable I feel more feminine and pretty and turning different type of heads thank you. I'm subscribing
Exactly, my daddy always said look presentable when you step out, because you don’t know who you will meet. If you are single, could be your husband to be, if you are a business person, you could meet a potential client ….. and that makes sense to me today.
Ashley is AMAZING!!! And she’s gorgeous ❤️❤️
God’s word says Women must not let their beauty be something external..
This new age modern thing is so corrupt … The lashes and the weave and the long nails and the make up is all bull crap.
Natural beauty and the feminine, Godly spirit and aura you hold is most important.
I disagree with your interpretation of scripture. I believe that scripture is talking about the importance of internal beauty; not suggesting that our looks don’t matter.
Queen Esther spent time getting glammed up, in addition to praying, before she approached the king on behalf of her people.
You absolutely don’t need much she’s gorgeous naturally just keep positive.
I appreciate this... I never leave the house looking crazy, but I don't always put in as much effort as I should. Especially as a single woman!
She is so beautiful and would obviously look great in anything
The lady on the right looks far better than the lady on the left and only one is dressed up 🤷🏾♀️ there’s beauty in simplicity and less is more. Looking over done up can sometimes look like you’re trying too hard. Nails, lashes, lace fronts, big glasses, skin tight clothing, strong perfumes, etc. Can just be too much tbh. Casual or sporty attire can be cute if done correctly and still attract quality men.
You dont need to bring down the other woman to uplift the other. Thats HER personal perspective and shes right. The type of effort you put into yourself is the type of people you will attract. If you look like you dont love yourself wearing stained clothes mix matched socks hair a mess you will attract a man that will treat you exactly how you present yourself. And as a woman having that stuff your nails and hair nails done is a HUGE confidence booster and puts the icing on the cake for a outfit and she also already said you can wear a cute workout fit and still make it look presentable. So you bringing her down yet praising someone who looks "simplistic" shows that you just walk out of the house any type of way.
Crazier part is the girl on the right ALSO unconsciously acknowledged she has self esteem issues. Thats straight proof that the way you dress and carry yourself is exactly how others will view you. Take care of yourself ladies
Agree to disagree. Girl on left looks way over done. At best she’ll probably get a ball player or a dusty disguised as HV. You’ll see that men are very simple and to carry yourself well and look put together doesn’t mean you have to be over the top or wearing pounds of makeup, lashes and nails. Do you see how the women actually winning in the dating/marriage game are usually what people call “plain janes” and not the baddie look type of chicks. It’s all in your energy and confidence. Slapping on a bodycon dress, contouring your nose, and putting on ten inch nails doesn’t automatically breed confidence. If your aura and energy is still off, that’ll still project in your interactions
@@rachelesmith3342 the "plain janes" that are so called "winning" are with men that dont invest in their women so they can continue to look like "plain janes" they are with the 50/50 men that cant fully provide and the women that look like they don't care for themselves or an "investment" attract that so yeah it makes sense that some men think "plain janes" are "winning" because they cannot afford a woman that looks like ashley. Ashley is the perfect example of feminine. She goes to the gym, she is self aware, she doesn't tolerate any b.s and knows what man she wants to attract. So no she wont attract just any man because she not only had high standards but is also self aware so you thinking she'll attract a dusty man or a ball player just because she holds herself to a high standard shows you have problems yourself. Men are not just "simple" creatures they are just visual... simple and visual are two different things. Men date by the situations they are in. If he is poor has low self esteem he will for for the girl on the right a high value man will go for ashley. She is kept up and knows her worth and value. Only masculine women think that just being "plain" and not caring for their appearance attracts a stable good man. That only attracts a man who sees "oh she doesnt have her nails done/ hair done i wont have to worry about keeping up her maintenance" he will see you and treat you exactly how you make yourself appear and the quicker you notice and learn this the better
@@rachelesmith3342 it's proof everywhere all on social media and in reality if you present yourself a certain way you will get that. You present yourself looking dusty a hot mess Thats exactly what you will get. You think lowly of yourself and dont put in any effort once so ever thats what yourself going to get just like you stated thats how energy works. You are what you attract. And the ones that have an issue with what shes saying not only have issues of their own but they dont think of themself as valuable enough to even care to do anything about their appearance. Wounded feminine and extremely masculine
I love Vee. And im happy to have met her on Tiktok. I do believe she will attract a certain type of man with her sweatpants because she already has a high percentage of masculinity to her. Not in a bad way. We are just more tomboyish. So by putting more effort in leaving the house and wearing a dress, I believe she will feel more soft. Consequently attracting the type of man Ashley is hinting at. This was good advice. She didnt call Vee ugly. She just kept it real. Your appearance can definitely make certain type of men shy away even if they think you’re a pretty plain jane.