One of my very close friends is part of an OSDD system, and she had a very similar experience to your friend: she knew she was anorexic before she even considered OSDD and it turns out her eating disorder voice is one of her alters. Thank you for talking about this, it's so important and not discussed enough!
This video made me feel so validated, thank you so much for making it. I never knew about any of this and I’ve been looking into DID and OSDD because I’m wondering if it could be an explanation as to why I feel so weird all of the time. My counsellor says she thinks I have DPDR but I really wonder if there’s more. I’m still exploring it with her. I can relate so strongly to everything you said you experience, it’s almost exactly what I experience. Plus I’m a vegetarian, have been my whole life, and I’m really struggling to get proper nutrition because I just can’t seem to eat. I really hope you’ll make more videos on this topic in the future, I’m really glad I found your channel! 😊
We have both ed and did and it has been hard. We dont have very many system friends we feel comfortable talking with this about. Thank you for making this video. We are currently dealing with alot of body weakness from our ed.
Someone doesn't have to be underweight to have an ED. Anyone can have an ED no matter the weight or physical presentation of the being. ED's are mental disorders as well as physical disorders. ED's are really dangerous so take care of yourselves and maybe look into the possibility if it's a concern :).
We have a few alters that have a hard time with food, because food was used as a way to control us during times of abuse (we had to "earn" our right to eat and it was awful). Thanks for making this video, i never really stepped back to think about how that aspect of trauma affected all of us to this day.
We're similar, both the host and I have an eating disorder, we've both started fronting less because our gatekeeper (Nia) is trying to protect the body. -Connor
thank you for making this video!!! it’s a topic i haven’t seen talked about very often online, so i’m glad someone said something. also, your guys’ hair fits you so well, i love it!
One tiny correction to the list of eating disorders. The DSM-V actually lists EDNOS as Other Specified Feeding and Eating Disorders (OSFED for short). It is still the catch-all category, just changed the name to describe it better.
I suppose since DID is caused by trauma... with us our "parents" would constantly critique our looks, saying we were fat and that led to some bad eating -Connor
I had no idea that ARFID was a thing along with all the things you said after that felt familiar. I literally walked away from my laptop. Thank you for making this video, it's very informative and eye opening.
We have struggled with bulimia nervosa for a long time, actively when the body was a teenager. That went on for several years. While we don't actively binge/purge anymore, the urge (need?) is still there, just not as often or as strongly. Thank you for talking about this.
Oh god saaaaame. God. One or two of us are very much restrictive eaters, then me and two more of us (I think), are bingers. I've got this one memory in the headspace of staring down one of the restrictors (who was fuming), and eating an apple. As a protector, binging is, in a weird convoluted way, one of the things I do to protect the body? Like, get it lots of sustenance quickly if the others haven't been treating it right? It's maladaptive, sure (I'm working on it in therapy n all), and I've got other self- care things that I'm working to use instead, but it is interesting how these mechanisms develop!
The way ballista speaks is so soothing- Like all of your voices are soothing but the way Ballista phrases things is just so calming and like oddly comforting. Anyways i love you guys and you’re all awesome!!
I deal a lot with binge eatting disorder, the experience of which can commonly be described as “going into an auto pilot-like state, and eatting excess amounts of food”. In a sense, a sort of dissociation. I would be very interested in any systems experience(s) with binge eatting disorder, as they possibly share commonality in terms of experiencing dissociation! (The two disorders experience it for different reasons, of course! Rather I mean I would be interested in the experiences of the systems/people that fit within that cross section!) Apologies if this made no sense, I just woke up and caught your upload lol.
TWs for Fasting, Binge-Eating and Dissociation We don't have a binge eating disorder, but we've been diagnosed with atypical anorexia (it might be EDNOS in English, I'm not sure) long before we knew about the system because multiple alters were fasting while one fronted every few days to eat for the system. We always described it to our therapist as "a state of heavy depersonalisation in which I lose control over my body and won't stop eating" and have since realised that someone must have been co-con or observing an alter who was aware that we hadn't eaten for a while and tried to balance out our food intake. I hope this is at least somewhat helpful xD - Jason
A few of us have got BED!! 😅 although it's a lot more under control now. One sec, I just talked about this in another reply - I'll copy what I said there over here.
Here we go: one or two of us are very much restrictive eaters, then me and two more of us (I think), are bingers. I've got this one memory in the headspace of staring down one of the restrictors (who was fuming), and eating an apple. As a protector, binging is, in a weird convoluted way, one of the things I do to protect the body? Like, get it lots of sustenance quickly if the others haven't been treating it right? It's maladaptive, sure (I'm working on it in therapy n all), and I've got other self- care things that I'm working to use instead, but it is interesting how these mechanisms develop! But yeah, I 100% get what you're saying with the parallels between binging and dissociation. What a weird (yet very interesting) intersection!
We have ARFID too, and protein shakes have been such a lifesaver, and we also supplement with fruit/veggie drinks. Giving ourselves permission to switch to easier food/drink was so hard out of a misguided sense of shame, but the body is so much stronger now as a result, and that is something to be glad for
.Tw: Mentions of anx*ety and de*ression, mentions of being forced to do something. . . The "Voices you give nicknames could actually be alters" part is 100% true for our host! They thought they had severe anxiety/depression and felt like it was talking to them, telling them to do things they didn't want to. They thought everyone with anxiety experienced this before finding the DID community on UA-cam. Everything fell into place then. And here we are, an OSDD system of currently 22(? 22ish?). Thanks for the whole video though, it's really informational and has helped us understand more things!
Right so I heard the list of trigger warnings and was like - no way I'll get triggered by this topic. Well maybe there was a reason why I clicked on that video in the first place right? --' Anyways, thanks for the videos.
we have an alter named tweek who is the holder of extreme anxiety symptoms but he also has other qualities about him (hes not a fragment anymore). hes like this genius 8 year old who reads pubmed articles but he also is the protector of anyone else from the our host, hunter, from panic attacks.
I dont know the history behind your logo so apologies if I seem insensitive. I redrew your guy's icon and I was wondering if you guys would like to see it and which way I could send it to you so you could see it. I'm always willing to redraw it if you would like me to ( I'll even do it free of charge ) with any suggestions and changes you would like
We don't have an eating disorder but we do have to be EXTREMELY careful about food additives that also show up in meds (horrific migraines otherwise). Our osdd system also started off as personality characteristics with proper names. Interesting video as always!
Here I am! I hate eating so much food it is disgusting just as the body is I mean cmon this body has a BMI of 24! Tryin to get it to an BMI of 18 or below ^^ I feel way more comfi when the body is slightly underweight but there are other personalitys binging when they're fronting or they don't exercise and stuff wich is really annoying and then I have to fight with em because they wanna front and I am like "I know you'll binge so I won't let you". Nobody will ever understand that I have an eating disorder but the body is normal weight because noone will ever understand that we are a system and that we are completely diffrent personalitys with diffrent body images and diffrent needs and stuff... And I will never understand how you actually would like to have DID like WTF is wrong with you if you wanna have DID. It is just annoying and exhausting and stuff
I have a problem that I hope somebody can provide some insight in. I have DID, and our system's Caretaker is gone. I do not know what happened, but she just disappeared one day. Our Little has no idea what happened. Her and the Teen altars are getting upset, I have explained that the caretaker "went on vacation" but I don't know if she will ever come back. Anybody have any possible ideas on how to explain or what to do? Or even what might have happened to the caretaker? Thanks. - Oscar
Thank you for talking about this. I'm a singlet, so it's really nice to get input on how systems and eating disorders affect each other. I'm watching these videos kinda backwards in time so I know that you mentioned having autism. I know that autism can affect the sensitivity to taste. Bitter and sour things can be difficult to eat for some. I've noticed in my family, introducing veggies peeled is important since a majority of bitter flavors are found in the skin. Adding sugar can cut the flavor too but that works more for sour and not bitter flavors. If you like to bake, many foods that tend to be slimy when cooked, like squash, can be neutralized when made into a cake or bread like consistency (canned pumpkin or pre cut squash works if the texture of cleaning a pumpkin can be difficult). Also mayonnaise, if sauses are okay texture, mixed with other things like sriracha, ketchup, or other condiments can help cover up certain flavors like those found in broccoli. I hope this info maybe of use to you. Thank you for sharing your personal experiences and knowledge.
I don’t know if we have an eating disorder or not but some of us have a difficult time forcing ourselves to eat. It feels like a chore to some of us when it should be something we want to do. Most of us love food but just don’t want to eat when we’re hungry. Speaking of... we need to eat so we’ll end this comment with the question, “Is some of our inability to eat when hungry normal or a symptom of an ED?”
This is really eye-opening and interesting as I never thought about this before, but well for starters our system isn't professionally diagnosed, but well- pretty hard to try and deny 5 or so others in the head. anyway I sometimes take notice of lots of candy and junkfood being bought. Food was always a problem and i almost always find myself thinking of some snappy comeback i can spout if someone dares question what i'm eating and of how much. becuase that was always a problem. snarky comments made by family members to degrade me and make me feel like shit for what i'm eating. and often our body would have to go long periods without proper sustinance because of lack of money. so when the time comes that we can eat normally, we often get fuller faster and have a hard time eating normal portions because the body gets used to that lack of proper nutrients and normal portions become too much. Yet when we have money of our own it seems to most often go towards junk food. i'm unsure if that's because of old habits, or some sort of eating disorder. but it's quite an interesting thing to think about when it comes to our own experiences.
This is such a good topic to inform people about. I have one alter who has anorexia and she was our host for years. She fronted for years so the effects were visable. However, when we went to treatment, it was usually me (current host) who was out and I didn't know why I could get motivated to gain weight during therapy, but still kept losing weight and had a hard time getting food down my throat. Later, when we got to a very low point in our lives due to the anorexia, another alter stepped up, who had binge eating disorder. These two alters constantly battled with one another and tried to compensate eachother. I had no idea what was going on and no therapy seemed to work. Things started to get better once we found out we were a system and we learned to communicate internally. This whole hell costed us more than 18 years of our lives and it's still a struggle sometimes, but it got sooo much better after the communication got better. There's no use in threating me if it's them who need to be treated. But since their eating disorders made them push me to the front, so they could stay hidden, that was a difficult thing to do. Yet I'm glad they gave it a chance and now see how they need to work together to maintaine the balance in our eating habbits. If one of them falls of the wagon, the other will too. I wouldn't wish these struggles for anyone, but I've learned there's hope and things can really get better.❤
Tbh I don't know much at all about EDs, but I'm worried because we realised one of us is very...picky? About the foods he eats. He's scared of the feeling of heaviness in our stomach, scared of feeling full or eating anything too heavy. I didn't realise it was something he dealt with, and I don't think even he realised because he's not usually out around mealtimes. And it's weird because he avoids eating, but I'm a comfort eater. So not only is it like "oh, I didn't realise you might have a disordered relationship with food" but now I'm realising /I/ might have one too. But the exact opposite. So it's all new territory for me :/
🔷🔹 Lmao there's a small one Tw for ED . Edit: that arfid ed??? I didn't know it existed and I fit the criteria and some of the symptoms you discribed? It explains a lot, ty for the info. Im gonna have to do more research about it.
M (the host) has suffered from a variety of eating disorders over the course of about 4 years, and only recently went into recovery. We really needed this. Thanks guys!
I had a similar experience to your friend! I had a serious eating disorder as a teen/early adult, with a "nickname" (hi there, Cassandra). When I got pregnant with my first kid, the eating disorder vanished. Now, I understand Cassandra couldn't cope with our body being pregnant and went dormant for a while. Fast forward about 10 years and I ended up in inpatient trauma and substance abuse treatment (I was there for trauma, with the top Trauma Fellows in the field). We took the MMPI and were SHOCKED to find out that disordered eating popped up in a big way. I was so mad to be forced into ED Anon groups and therapy track. I didn't understand that even though we hadn't had active behaviors for a decade, Cassandra still had(has) issues with food and our body. I am surprised the campus I was on didn't know much about dissociative disorders at all. We, as a system, slipped through. Though we had an intense experience with experiential therapy that we now recognize as a Little fusing/integrating with the whole system. They didn't catch the DID but they sure caught the ED! We were diagnosed with DID in April. We have just started working through our stuff but I know we will have to help Cassandra deal with her food related traumas. She wants nothing to do with any sort of treatment at ALL right now, so we'll see what happens when we get there.
I mean no harm, just wanted to know little bit more, do u people know the reason behind eating disorder, i saw ur previous vedios, u guys were healthy, although now also u people look good, but just wanted to know the reason
Hi Ballista! ☺️ I’ve never had an eating disorder but I have always felt the need to wanna look a certain way because I get *very* self-conscious about my body, my weight, pretty much anything. I doubt it’d ever go away, but I’m working on it! ALSO! I like: 🟪 EDIT: Congrats on 19K subscribers!! 😱💜
Odwalla's are great for me. They cost more than making your own smoothies or protein shakes, but they're easy. And I can convince myself that they're healthy.
Oh crap! 😣😭😭😭😭 Every time I accept what I know to be true, I run across some more truth. This is not fun. Thank you for the video... Appreciate you guys. 💚✌
watching any of you guys’ videos is like getting a long-needed never-found hug. so validating for experiences that i didn’t know needed validating. thank you for being so open, calm, and kind with every topic that you cover. it really has helped so much as i find out more about myself (including things i had previously tried to not know about myself). so, thank you. -nico
One of my very close friends is part of an OSDD system, and she had a very similar experience to your friend: she knew she was anorexic before she even considered OSDD and it turns out her eating disorder voice is one of her alters. Thank you for talking about this, it's so important and not discussed enough!
I experienced the same thing!
we don't have an ed but smoothies are wonderful for headmates that have trouble with making food
This video made me feel so validated, thank you so much for making it. I never knew about any of this and I’ve been looking into DID and OSDD because I’m wondering if it could be an explanation as to why I feel so weird all of the time. My counsellor says she thinks I have DPDR but I really wonder if there’s more. I’m still exploring it with her. I can relate so strongly to everything you said you experience, it’s almost exactly what I experience. Plus I’m a vegetarian, have been my whole life, and I’m really struggling to get proper nutrition because I just can’t seem to eat. I really hope you’ll make more videos on this topic in the future, I’m really glad I found your channel! 😊
We have both ed and did and it has been hard. We dont have very many system friends we feel comfortable talking with this about. Thank you for making this video. We are currently dealing with alot of body weakness from our ed.
I’m the host and lots of our alters say I have an eating disorder but I don’t think I do.
And the actual body isn’t underweight either
- Vi 🌦
Someone doesn't have to be underweight to have an ED. Anyone can have an ED no matter the weight or physical presentation of the being. ED's are mental disorders as well as physical disorders. ED's are really dangerous so take care of yourselves and maybe look into the possibility if it's a concern :).
arfid adjacent
We have a few alters that have a hard time with food, because food was used as a way to control us during times of abuse (we had to "earn" our right to eat and it was awful). Thanks for making this video, i never really stepped back to think about how that aspect of trauma affected all of us to this day.
One of our headmates suffers with anorexia. But our body itself doesn't if that makes sense?
Definitely! Sargon in our system is the same way
-Ballista
We're similar, both the host and I have an eating disorder, we've both started fronting less because our gatekeeper (Nia) is trying to protect the body.
-Connor
I really wanted to watch this but I stopped and I feel bad but I need to take care of myself first
Self-care must always come first. Stay Safe, Carrie
I love u normalizing these topics!!
The body’s hair gives me LIFE
Katie Polhamus 🥰
thank you for making this video!!! it’s a topic i haven’t seen talked about very often online, so i’m glad someone said something. also, your guys’ hair fits you so well, i love it!
One tiny correction to the list of eating disorders. The DSM-V actually lists EDNOS as Other Specified Feeding and Eating Disorders (OSFED for short). It is still the catch-all category, just changed the name to describe it better.
I never thought abt how ppl with DID have more than DID (ik that sounds dumb)
I know, right?? A lot of people with DID have a bunch of other disorders as well, including us lol
-Ballista
I suppose since DID is caused by trauma... with us our "parents" would constantly critique our looks, saying we were fat and that led to some bad eating
-Connor
I had no idea that ARFID was a thing along with all the things you said after that felt familiar. I literally walked away from my laptop. Thank you for making this video, it's very informative and eye opening.
Our host deals with anorexic tendencies but the rest of us don't. It's strange definitely
We have struggled with bulimia nervosa for a long time, actively when the body was a teenager. That went on for several years. While we don't actively binge/purge anymore, the urge (need?) is still there, just not as often or as strongly.
Thank you for talking about this.
Oh BOY! here we goooo!
You are so cute :D freaking adorable
Some of us have binge eating and some have restrictive eating. Some weeks we yo-yo all over the place!
Oh god saaaaame. God. One or two of us are very much restrictive eaters, then me and two more of us (I think), are bingers. I've got this one memory in the headspace of staring down one of the restrictors (who was fuming), and eating an apple.
As a protector, binging is, in a weird convoluted way, one of the things I do to protect the body? Like, get it lots of sustenance quickly if the others haven't been treating it right? It's maladaptive, sure (I'm working on it in therapy n all), and I've got other self- care things that I'm working to use instead, but it is interesting how these mechanisms develop!
The way ballista speaks is so soothing-
Like all of your voices are soothing but the way Ballista phrases things is just so calming and like oddly comforting. Anyways i love you guys and you’re all awesome!!
Hope you got purple teal ribbons via mail
We did!!!! We just picked them up in the mail today and we love them!! And the blue stuff 😆🥰 thank you so much!!!!
-Ballista
I deal a lot with binge eatting disorder, the experience of which can commonly be described as “going into an auto pilot-like state, and eatting excess amounts of food”. In a sense, a sort of dissociation. I would be very interested in any systems experience(s) with binge eatting disorder, as they possibly share commonality in terms of experiencing dissociation! (The two disorders experience it for different reasons, of course! Rather I mean I would be interested in the experiences of the systems/people that fit within that cross section!) Apologies if this made no sense, I just woke up and caught your upload lol.
TWs for Fasting, Binge-Eating and Dissociation
We don't have a binge eating disorder, but we've been diagnosed with atypical anorexia (it might be EDNOS in English, I'm not sure) long before we knew about the system because multiple alters were fasting while one fronted every few days to eat for the system. We always described it to our therapist as "a state of heavy depersonalisation in which I lose control over my body and won't stop eating" and have since realised that someone must have been co-con or observing an alter who was aware that we hadn't eaten for a while and tried to balance out our food intake. I hope this is at least somewhat helpful xD - Jason
@@HopelessCaseLP Oh that was definitely helpful!! And very interesting, thank you so much for sharing your experiences!
A few of us have got BED!! 😅 although it's a lot more under control now. One sec, I just talked about this in another reply - I'll copy what I said there over here.
Here we go: one or two of us are very much restrictive eaters, then me and two more of us (I think), are bingers. I've got this one memory in the headspace of staring down one of the restrictors (who was fuming), and eating an apple.
As a protector, binging is, in a weird convoluted way, one of the things I do to protect the body? Like, get it lots of sustenance quickly if the others haven't been treating it right? It's maladaptive, sure (I'm working on it in therapy n all), and I've got other self- care things that I'm working to use instead, but it is interesting how these mechanisms develop!
But yeah, I 100% get what you're saying with the parallels between binging and dissociation. What a weird (yet very interesting) intersection!
We have ARFID too, and protein shakes have been such a lifesaver, and we also supplement with fruit/veggie drinks. Giving ourselves permission to switch to easier food/drink was so hard out of a misguided sense of shame, but the body is so much stronger now as a result, and that is something to be glad for
Your description of arfid was straight on, I have it, and that’s how I’d describe it
.Tw: Mentions of anx*ety and de*ression, mentions of being forced to do something.
.
.
The "Voices you give nicknames could actually be alters" part is 100% true for our host! They thought they had severe anxiety/depression and felt like it was talking to them, telling them to do things they didn't want to. They thought everyone with anxiety experienced this before finding the DID community on UA-cam. Everything fell into place then. And here we are, an OSDD system of currently 22(? 22ish?). Thanks for the whole video though, it's really informational and has helped us understand more things!
Right so I heard the list of trigger warnings and was like - no way I'll get triggered by this topic.
Well maybe there was a reason why I clicked on that video in the first place right? --'
Anyways, thanks for the videos.
Oooh, this'll be a very interesting one. It's wild how these kinda thinks work for us.
I’ve been trying to find stuff on this for a long time so I’m rly glad u made this video!! Would love more on this subject
we have an alter named tweek who is the holder of extreme anxiety symptoms but he also has other qualities about him (hes not a fragment anymore). hes like this genius 8 year old who reads pubmed articles but he also is the protector of anyone else from the our host, hunter, from panic attacks.
You are super cute/handsome!
I dont know the history behind your logo so apologies if I seem insensitive. I redrew your guy's icon and I was wondering if you guys would like to see it and which way I could send it to you so you could see it. I'm always willing to redraw it if you would like me to ( I'll even do it free of charge ) with any suggestions and changes you would like
Absolutely!!! We’d love that ❤️ Instagram is a good way to send us stuff if you’ve got that :)
We don't have an eating disorder but we do have to be EXTREMELY careful about food additives that also show up in meds (horrific migraines otherwise). Our osdd system also started off as personality characteristics with proper names. Interesting video as always!
Here I am! I hate eating so much food it is disgusting just as the body is I mean cmon this body has a BMI of 24! Tryin to get it to an BMI of 18 or below ^^ I feel way more comfi when the body is slightly underweight but there are other personalitys binging when they're fronting or they don't exercise and stuff wich is really annoying and then I have to fight with em because they wanna front and I am like "I know you'll binge so I won't let you".
Nobody will ever understand that I have an eating disorder but the body is normal weight because noone will ever understand that we are a system and that we are completely diffrent personalitys with diffrent body images and diffrent needs and stuff...
And I will never understand how you actually would like to have DID like WTF is wrong with you if you wanna have DID.
It is just annoying and exhausting and stuff
I have a problem that I hope somebody can provide some insight in.
I have DID, and our system's Caretaker is gone. I do not know what happened, but she just disappeared one day.
Our Little has no idea what happened. Her and the Teen altars are getting upset, I have explained that the caretaker "went on vacation" but I don't know if she will ever come back. Anybody have any possible ideas on how to explain or what to do? Or even what might have happened to the caretaker? Thanks. - Oscar
Thank you for talking about this. I'm a singlet, so it's really nice to get input on how systems and eating disorders affect each other. I'm watching these videos kinda backwards in time so I know that you mentioned having autism. I know that autism can affect the sensitivity to taste. Bitter and sour things can be difficult to eat for some. I've noticed in my family, introducing veggies peeled is important since a majority of bitter flavors are found in the skin. Adding sugar can cut the flavor too but that works more for sour and not bitter flavors. If you like to bake, many foods that tend to be slimy when cooked, like squash, can be neutralized when made into a cake or bread like consistency (canned pumpkin or pre cut squash works if the texture of cleaning a pumpkin can be difficult). Also mayonnaise, if sauses are okay texture, mixed with other things like sriracha, ketchup, or other condiments can help cover up certain flavors like those found in broccoli. I hope this info maybe of use to you. Thank you for sharing your personal experiences and knowledge.
I don’t know if we have an eating disorder or not but some of us have a difficult time forcing ourselves to eat. It feels like a chore to some of us when it should be something we want to do. Most of us love food but just don’t want to eat when we’re hungry. Speaking of... we need to eat so we’ll end this comment with the question, “Is some of our inability to eat when hungry normal or a symptom of an ED?”
This is really eye-opening and interesting as I never thought about this before, but well for starters our system isn't professionally diagnosed, but well- pretty hard to try and deny 5 or so others in the head. anyway I sometimes take notice of lots of candy and junkfood being bought. Food was always a problem and i almost always find myself thinking of some snappy comeback i can spout if someone dares question what i'm eating and of how much. becuase that was always a problem. snarky comments made by family members to degrade me and make me feel like shit for what i'm eating. and often our body would have to go long periods without proper sustinance because of lack of money. so when the time comes that we can eat normally, we often get fuller faster and have a hard time eating normal portions because the body gets used to that lack of proper nutrients and normal portions become too much. Yet when we have money of our own it seems to most often go towards junk food. i'm unsure if that's because of old habits, or some sort of eating disorder. but it's quite an interesting thing to think about when it comes to our own experiences.
So so glad someone else has researched and is talking about this! My lovely girlfriend will love to hear from not just us that she's not alone! 😆☺❤
This is such a good topic to inform people about. I have one alter who has anorexia and she was our host for years. She fronted for years so the effects were visable. However, when we went to treatment, it was usually me (current host) who was out and I didn't know why I could get motivated to gain weight during therapy, but still kept losing weight and had a hard time getting food down my throat. Later, when we got to a very low point in our lives due to the anorexia, another alter stepped up, who had binge eating disorder. These two alters constantly battled with one another and tried to compensate eachother. I had no idea what was going on and no therapy seemed to work. Things started to get better once we found out we were a system and we learned to communicate internally. This whole hell costed us more than 18 years of our lives and it's still a struggle sometimes, but it got sooo much better after the communication got better. There's no use in threating me if it's them who need to be treated. But since their eating disorders made them push me to the front, so they could stay hidden, that was a difficult thing to do. Yet I'm glad they gave it a chance and now see how they need to work together to maintaine the balance in our eating habbits. If one of them falls of the wagon, the other will too.
I wouldn't wish these struggles for anyone, but I've learned there's hope and things can really get better.❤
Could you have one with completely different disorder
I especially love Aether's educational videos.
Hey!!!!! ✌✌✌✌✌🙌🙌🙌 a new video yeyyyy 🤗🤗
Do all of you have some sort of eating disorder
Tbh I don't know much at all about EDs, but I'm worried because we realised one of us is very...picky? About the foods he eats. He's scared of the feeling of heaviness in our stomach, scared of feeling full or eating anything too heavy.
I didn't realise it was something he dealt with, and I don't think even he realised because he's not usually out around mealtimes.
And it's weird because he avoids eating, but I'm a comfort eater. So not only is it like "oh, I didn't realise you might have a disordered relationship with food" but now I'm realising /I/ might have one too. But the exact opposite.
So it's all new territory for me :/
I'll tell him about smoothies though. He loves vitamin drinks too which is good. I think he'd live off supplements if he could
Was the audio really low for anyone else?
Alaska Young No. But! If it was low for you, it’s okay to turn it up a little bit ☺️
yeah it was ://
🔷🔹
Lmao there's a small one
Tw for ED
.
Edit: that arfid ed??? I didn't know it existed and I fit the criteria and some of the symptoms you discribed? It explains a lot, ty for the info. Im gonna have to do more research about it.
its so calming listening to you guys talk. (im listening to the intro right now)
Can you do q video about age sliding
We have a video on age sliding
M (the host) has suffered from a variety of eating disorders over the course of about 4 years, and only recently went into recovery. We really needed this. Thanks guys!
I had a similar experience to your friend! I had a serious eating disorder as a teen/early adult, with a "nickname" (hi there, Cassandra). When I got pregnant with my first kid, the eating disorder vanished. Now, I understand Cassandra couldn't cope with our body being pregnant and went dormant for a while. Fast forward about 10 years and I ended up in inpatient trauma and substance abuse treatment (I was there for trauma, with the top Trauma Fellows in the field). We took the MMPI and were SHOCKED to find out that disordered eating popped up in a big way. I was so mad to be forced into ED Anon groups and therapy track. I didn't understand that even though we hadn't had active behaviors for a decade, Cassandra still had(has) issues with food and our body. I am surprised the campus I was on didn't know much about dissociative disorders at all. We, as a system, slipped through. Though we had an intense experience with experiential therapy that we now recognize as a Little fusing/integrating with the whole system. They didn't catch the DID but they sure caught the ED!
We were diagnosed with DID in April. We have just started working through our stuff but I know we will have to help Cassandra deal with her food related traumas. She wants nothing to do with any sort of treatment at ALL right now, so we'll see what happens when we get there.
I mean no harm, just wanted to know little bit more, do u people know the reason behind eating disorder, i saw ur previous vedios, u guys were healthy, although now also u people look good, but just wanted to know the reason
Do you mean in general, or for us in specific? 🤔
@@AcrylicAndAether for you guys, actually when i had depression i couldnt eat, so i was kind of curious about you guys specifically, not in general
For us, it’s a few reasons. It’s from our genetics, trauma, a form of self harm, and dysphoria
Thank you for making this video. Always learning things from you guys. Hope you're doing well. Take care.
Hi Ballista! ☺️ I’ve never had an eating disorder but I have always felt the need to wanna look a certain way because I get *very* self-conscious about my body, my weight, pretty much anything. I doubt it’d ever go away, but I’m working on it!
ALSO! I like: 🟪
EDIT: Congrats on 19K subscribers!! 😱💜
Eey!
Odwalla's are great for me. They cost more than making your own smoothies or protein shakes, but they're easy. And I can convince myself that they're healthy.
Oh crap! 😣😭😭😭😭
Every time I accept what I know to be true, I run across some more truth. This is not fun. Thank you for the video... Appreciate you guys. 💚✌
Thank you for making this video. We really needed it! Hope you are doing well. Take care.
-Alice
Thank you so much for the warning, I've been able to come back and now watch this when I'm more able to cope
I'm gonna save this video for later cause of the TWs but sending love and support and thank you for continuing to upload 🙏
I love your channel because it helps us learn about thing that no one talks about and that we deal with. We dont feel alone watching your channel
Thank you for making this I learned alot just from it was are horrific on their own I can't begin to imagine what adding d.i.d does to the mix
watching any of you guys’ videos is like getting a long-needed never-found hug. so validating for experiences that i didn’t know needed validating. thank you for being so open, calm, and kind with every topic that you cover. it really has helped so much as i find out more about myself (including things i had previously tried to not know about myself). so, thank you. -nico
Thank you for this content! Very educational and soothing at the same time!
That was very interesting keep being yourselves
Love your Chanel❤️
Great to meet you Ballista!
Well, I think we have ARFID now.