Struggling to Choose What You Want in Life?
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- Опубліковано 31 тра 2024
- On today’s show, we hear about:
- A woman wondering if anxiety can cause hoarding
- A dad debating whether to help his son or preserve their finances
- A young woman worried she’s spending too much time with her boyfriend
Send John your questions. Leave a voicemail at 844.693.3291 or reach out via this page: Ask a Question - Ramsey (ramseysolutions.com) We want to talk to YOU!
As heard on this episode:
- BetterHelp - bit.ly/3seoBCe
- DreamCloud - dreamcloudsleep.com/delony
- Hallow - www.hallow.com/delony
- Thorne (25% Off Orders) - www.thorne.com/u/delony
Resources:
• Building a Non-Anxious Life - bit.ly/3EL5ubR
• Anxiety Test - bit.ly/460QXUp
• Own Your Past, Change Your Future - bit.ly/47q7Skm
• Questions for Humans Conversation Cards - bit.ly/472lIKd
• John's Free Guided Meditation - bit.ly/3MAGpEV
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This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at www.betterhelp.com/delony and get on your way to being your best self.
The Dr. John Delony Show is a caller-driven show that offers real people a chance to be heard as they struggle with relationship issues and mental health challenges. John will give you practical advice on how to connect with people, how to take the next right step when you feel paralyzed, and how to cut through the depression and anxiety that can feel so overwhelming. You are not alone in this battle. You are worth being well-and it starts by focusing on what you can control. Let us know what’s going on by leaving a voicemail at 844.693.3291 or visiting johndelony.com/show. We want to talk to YOU!
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I started a D&D group that meets at my house on Sundays so my son can see and hear our silliness.
First caller, please get in with a trauma therapist who also understands hoarding and grief. Yes, that niche does exist. Blessings to you.
I am always decluttering/ downsizing... it's a chore but well worthwhile.
Lori didn’t call for advice. She called to talk about herself and tell some stories 😂
She needs a therapist. She needs a professional to talk through all of these anxieties coming up two times a week for an hour, not 15 minutes on a call.
There is none so blind as those who WILL NOT SEE! Shut up and listen.
Second caller’s son sounds so similar to my eldest’s experience in high school. Turned out that his first girlfriends mother was essentially grooming him, continuing a relationship AFTER her daughter broke up with him. Manipulating him and keeping him tied emotionally to her daughter who was sleeping around with multiple “friends” of his. We solved for this by reporting the woman to the police, filing a protection order. Pulled him out of school, homeschooled him for a year, then to college. He’s 22 now and married, with a child on the way. Don’t take anything at face value and do NOT trust anyone❤
💯👍 You protected your kid.
First caller was the most anxious human who’s called the show in a long time! Her anxiety got more and more intense with every minute she talked (often over Dr. Delony’s advice) 😞 my heart hurts for her and prays she finds relief from the pain and suffering
then his advice was not very professional or helpful to say the least, what kind of doctor would add fire to an already mess of hell?
@@framestomind7548Why do you say his advice wasn't helpful?
I came looking for this comment. It was hard listening to her. She's so anxious she won't even take a breath to stop and listen. It's also like she's bringing up her issues then proceeding to answer them herself (talking over John).
Can't imagine what she is like in her daily interactions.
Hope she finds the help she needs - if she is even willing to stop and listen over her own loud thoughts to hear anyone else.
I found Dr Deloney from Dawn as well. They are both awesome!
I am so sorry! I was a wreck sharing something really embarrassing in front of 100 thousand viewers! I know Italk really fast when I get nervious but my friends encouraged me to go for it. The letters to my mom were really helpful. Thanks for you well wishes!
I love Dawn, The Minimal Mom!
First caller was proving his point during the call that she needs a REAL support group & not just fb or online. She wouldnt stop talking & being a story teller to hear what he had to say & that is exactly why she needs actual ppl she can see standing in front of her to listen to her long winded self. Lord it was too much! He is so patient bc i could NEVA! Call for advice then tell him why he isn't right? Smh
Good Lord, I've never heard word "Yeah" so many times as in that call with Christine...
I rent a small studio flat, and have very little storage space, so it feels cluttered super easily. I’ve just cleared out loads of stuff I don’t use, don’t wear etc, and it feels so much better! It also meant some good donations to a local charity shop, which is a bonus.
They should teach a class in high school about core values for successful relationships. Nothing religious or virtuous just teach kids how to spot a compatible partner and how to respect others. A lot of these people calling seem to have rushed into marriage or ignored obvious red flags.
Yeah that would turn out great. Spoiled little communists who’ve never actually worked a day in their lives teaching our children about “core values” and principles for a “successful relationship”… taught by those who have never had a relationship. Would literally be like that single girl/nutjob Pearl teaching married women how to be a wife.🫤
Do we really want the government to teach kids about relationships?
Amen! They should also teach money management.
Problem is how do kids deal with their problems when the parent or guardian isn't even dealing with their own stuff and avoids it all? That's telling kids they should stop being a kid and be an adult because the adults don't feel like doing their job as parent.
ll
I can appreciate the chat with the last caller. Your friends have seasons sometimes and it was refreshing to hear that others go through it. I had a friend from 1st grade and at 35 it shifted bc I had a third child and all she would say when we got together was, "That's why we only had 2 kids." She was choosing to not be in relationship with me. It was hard to step out of it but it was a healthier choice in the end.
I didn’t loose friendships, but I had people say over and over, “Why are you having a third,” (and we are Catholic) or even worse, “Oh, you’re trying for a girl now?” (We had two boys first.)
I truly do not think people realize how rude it is!!! My second pregnancy had a test come back that there was a good chance of chromosomal issues with the baby. Turned out to be a false positive, but it made me brave when pregnant with my third child! I would answer, “No, we prayed to God for a healthy child, not the sex of the child.”
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If Lori says Dawn, The minimal mom one more time, Im gonna scream.
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OMG I am so sorry! I was so nervous sharing my problems in front of thousands of people. it's just Dawn was the only time I even thought possible to heal a hoarding disorder I have been living with for years. I can't believe I'm finally free.
@@loritawde3972Congratulations 🎉🎉🎉
@@loritawde3972I followed Dawn too. You're doing great.
Yes, straight A's can be a trauma response. That's why, in my past life as a middle school teacher, I worried about my students with good grades too. They usually were ignored by most everyone else because they had good grades and did not have behavior issues, but they could be just as much at risk as the other kids.
My Mama died in 2005 and I’m still not over it. I don’t know how to let go. Maybe I don’t want to.
Love that you ended with My chemical romance 😍😭😭😭
Omg me too!
It’s so sad when she said “the Demons are so big I can’t think about them quotes when she doesn’t realise those demons are making it very very difficult to not listen, but hear what you were saying. It’s like all the pores of her inward self are closed to any input.
in 10 years, you won't be friends with ANYONE OF THEM... the guys i considered my brothers are now only an acquaintance ...
Looking forward to this information.
💗Preordered!
Almost 200k subs!!
So grateful for you Dr. John, enjoy your videos❤
Grateful for dr John 😊
Caller 2 Son's life sounds exhausting. Prayers for him. Depression sucks and makes everything hard. Does he have ADHD, Anxiety, OCD and or Dyslexia? Life was an uphill for me, wish I had known about the above when I was in school.
It sounds totally like ADHD and the anxiety that often goes with it to me. And they are putting WAY too much pressure on him for grades and homework. He most likely needs ADHD treatment.
Love when Dr. Delony quotes a MCR song! 😭🙌🏻
You rock, Dr. Delony! I pre-ordered your book about a month ago and I can't wait to get it. Thank for all you do. Keep partying. haha
Hey bud. I'm 30 with a 8 6 and 2 year old. My wife has done alot of things over are relationship. To me marriage is a legality. The relationship is everything. Lately over the past few years she has drank an abused me heavily. The physical I can get past. But the emotional and mental things I can't. She's cheated, abused, lied, etc. I want to love and forget but I can't. What you got?
Oo, flip this around and it's me. The physical I cant get past though because he is so much stronger, he could kill me. I feel like it's over but that depresses me for so many reasons. I really did love him. But it only takes one person self destruction to break up a marriage and family.
💃💃💃💃as far away as possible
Females naturally cheat by nature. Make the next female submit. Easy fix
Write her a letter… you’ll probably need to make a couple drafts before getting just right.
Let her know, calmly and without name calling etc … what is required to stay married to you and live in the house with the kids. Rehab etc. AA …
Keep track of any evidence you currently have in case you need it for court.
If she doesn’t adhere to not abusing and controlling her drinking… tell her she has to move out.
You may consider separation … she leaves and you keep the kids. If she doesn’t see that as a wake up call you may need to file for divorce.
Good luck!
a couple of things:
Not long-term solutions
YOUR Health and safety are crucial. Think critically.
Stay ALERT!! (Don't get hammered. Steer clear of anything that could impair you at all.)
Be absolutely Clear in your language and word choice - even if you have to run it past someone. Spoken, Texted, Posted, whatever.
You, Look in the Mirror.
Don't let your female relatives post anything socially.
Consider thoughtfully your resources. People, funds, available services.
There will be meltdowns. Breathe and keep it together.
45:03 😂🎉😂😂😂 Hilarious! This WAS awesome.. "Happiness Intervention" ❤ We have decided you are too happy & don't prioritize your time with us. How about instead, "We miss you!"
It's not s phase. It's a lifestyle! Hey can Dr. John do an interview with Brent Smith, lead vocalist for Shinedown?💯
Love your videos! Dawn is also how I discovered you. ❤️ I read your book Own your Past and already got your new book on order.
The second caller that dad doesn't want to connect to his kid
Id buy your book but it only ships in the u.s. i would pay the 20 for the audible and ebook supplement though so you dont need to ship! Is that an option???
When’s the times ppl can call in. Got some things to deal with. You know what your talking about and id love your advice
From what i understand, people email the show on the website and the producers set up a time for them to call in.
As a man I can give you proper guidance.
Ok thanks. Il look into it
You can email or they have a voicemail number
Words of wisdom from the great Scott Rouse. Don't go down the hole with him because then you're both in the hole! Get help for you.
I have clinical depression caused by absolutely no outside factors whatsoever. I didn't even know that's what was wrong because I have a great life. My brain just doesn't know! 🤣
Why do her friends have to be labeled as selfish because they miss their friend? What if she has abandoned her friends? There are three sides to every story (hers, the friend, and the truth). Let's be honest. We all have that one (or more) freind who gets into a relationship and then ghosts their friend group. Then inevitably, the friend's relationship ends and they come crawling back to the friend group. You can be in a happy, healthy relationship and not be totally consumed by it at the same time. Don't be a 👻. Figure out how to be a decent friend and have a healthy relationship.
I was thinking the same thing. Based on what was said on the call it's hard to tell if her friends are just being unreasonable/unsupportive or on the flip side could they be getting caught up in young love and neglecting important relationships that they need, which is easy to do. Yes, if you are in a serious committed relationship that should be the priority. Friendships will shift with life changes, but you still need to tend to the other relationships in your life too. When the relationship is young it's easy to think you only need each other, but there will come a day when you are happily married but still in need of other friendships.
I got married at 20 delony, I was an adult!! Taylor swift 15/16 whatever the song is lol
Joking about bathroom stuff, especially in public, isn't grown up. It's absurdly popular, even in kids movies, which is less than appropriate. In fact, it's a socially acceptable grooming method. If you talk about certain body parts for one kind of function that's supposed to be private to anyone, even in church, then discussing the same parts doing other types of private functions becomes perfectly normal, too. Our words have power, let's use them wisely.
Is she advertising for minimal mom?
U
John's interrupting and yelling is stressing me out.
Same, I love his videos but he does that so often 😩
She is not listening
Kind of annoying that this first caller just rambling on and on and not listening to Doctor John. It’s his show and other people are listening you have to respect everyone’s time and not just go on and on
I am so sorry! I talk really fast when I get nervous, I totally apologize for being a wreck. It was super scary but my friends said to go for it.
@@loritawde3972You are amazing! What John said about how proud he was of you is so true. You are changing your family tree. Good luck with continued healing and peace! ❤️
@@loritawde3972 We all do things when we get nervous. Hey, identifying a problem is the first step to changing it if you so desire
@@loritawde3972You did a great job. Don’t listen to the negativity.
Submit to the Superior gender.
Dude you got time just to troll every video 😅. I'm jealous.
@@blueseptember2174since wen is giving life changing advice trolling?
I will gladly accept the role as the superior gender….this woman can survive and thrive!
@@texasrodeogirl3814 you would unfortunately have to transition to a man.
Great advice… you should take it🤣