How a son learned to enjoy caring for his father | Living inside with dementia

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  • Опубліковано 21 тра 2024
  • Follow us on UA-cam: bit.ly/FollowST
    Daniel Lim became the sole caregiver to both his parents in 2009, when his father Peter was diagnosed with dementia, and mother Elizabeth with breast cancer. Despite his initial struggles with his new role, he found success in empowering his father through his daily routine, and making improvements to his home to make it more dementia-friendly.
    His caregiving journey also prompted him to co-found Enable Asia, to provide support to people with dementia and their caregivers.
    For Daniel, his model of ‘personalised care’ helped to slow down his father’s dementia progression, and has brought his family closer together.
    VIEW THE INTERACTIVE: str.sg/dementia-inside
    FIND OUT MORE:
    Supporting caregivers of persons with dementia:
    www.aic.sg/body-mind/dementia...
    360 Virtual Reality Dementia-Friendly HDB Home Design Guide:
    cloudexpo.hiverlab.com/DFHome/
    The fifth edition of the Enabling Festival, by Enable Asia, runs from Sep 23 to Oct 16 2022.
    www.enableasia.org/
    RELATED VIDEO
    Building a more dementia-friendly society: • Building a dementia-fr...
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КОМЕНТАРІ • 55

  • @lilapillay4284
    @lilapillay4284 Рік тому +41

    Daniel is indeed a blessed soul. Taking care of his parents and putting their needs above his, is highly commendable. Sad to say not everyone will be able to do it willingly and happily.

    • @imdaniellim
      @imdaniellim Рік тому +4

      Good morning Lila, Daniel here, thank you for watching, hoping to share a glimpse into our crazy world.

  • @WWK186
    @WWK186 Рік тому +24

    Such a filial son, financial help should go to such families.

    • @imdaniellim
      @imdaniellim Рік тому +2

      Thank you Wendy, for highlighting this, financial is truly a challenge for us. Thank you for watching.

  • @musico3415
    @musico3415 Рік тому +13

    Hearing him sings touches my heart. I was told that all dementia patients could remember their younger days favorite songs. This uncle sings well.

    • @imdaniellim
      @imdaniellim Рік тому +1

      Daddy loves to sing, it allows him to express himself in ways he can no longer articulate.

    • @musico3415
      @musico3415 Рік тому +1

      @@imdaniellim When I was studying overseas, an elderly landlord (90 years old) of mine once told me that his wife (89 years old) with dementia couldn't remember him. And she always calls him 'uncle', 'brother' or something else. However, she could remember all the hymns she sang before in her younger days in church. She also loves to sing. She lives in a nursing home nearby his house. He would bring her to church every Sunday so that she could have some social life outside of her nursing home. She seems happy when in church.

    • @imdaniellim
      @imdaniellim Рік тому +1

      @@musico3415 Totally, emotions stay with us, Daddy can express his love for us through music.

  • @acky3000
    @acky3000 Рік тому +12

    salute to you daniel for all the hard work you put in

    • @imdaniellim
      @imdaniellim Рік тому +1

      Hi Alastair, thank you for the support and for watching this. It warms my heart knowing that there are people who care.

  • @lilycool2601
    @lilycool2601 Рік тому +13

    Daniel your parents are seeing the fruit of their labour. You will be bless n rewarded for your piety filial. You are such a good son. Not easy job..alot of patience, understanding n love is needed. Do take care of yourself too.

    • @imdaniellim
      @imdaniellim Рік тому +1

      Thanks LilyCool, it's about doing the best we can for as long as we can for the ones we love so dearly.

  • @vichelletacliad9399
    @vichelletacliad9399 Рік тому +6

    I salute you Mr.Daniel Affirm

    • @imdaniellim
      @imdaniellim Рік тому

      Good morning Vichelle, thank you for watching, please help to spread the word and generate greater awareness of persons living with dementia and caregiving.

  • @anytoh
    @anytoh 10 місяців тому +1

    Jia you Daniel….
    Daddy & mummy appreciate u .

  • @ymaster8719
    @ymaster8719 Рік тому +3

    Your parents are blessed to have you as a son. I wish I could turn back time and understood the disease better so that I could devote more time to look after mum before her passing.

  • @Ana-tz5nz
    @Ana-tz5nz Рік тому +2

    What a story. So beautiful and positive in so many ways. God bless this family, strength and good health to all of them.

  • @meloon5876
    @meloon5876 Рік тому +4

    Thks for highlighting the need to ask how a dementia parent would wsnt to be cared for vs how we the children wants to do it.
    Also, a good tip is to know our parent eg play up his ego in order to get him to do stuff.

  • @SmiileySmiiles
    @SmiileySmiiles Рік тому +7

    Amazing effort Daniel! ❤❤❤

    • @imdaniellim
      @imdaniellim Рік тому +2

      Thank you for watching, much appreciated. Please do help us to share this with more people whom you think might would be keen to watch.

  • @jameslee8608
    @jameslee8608 Рік тому +3

    There is a Chinese idiom which says, 你们养我大,我养你们老!
    Watching this documentary brings back many memories of my experiences and encounters, caring for mum who passed on, on mid-March this year, aged 101. Yes, it was daunting, really daunting to see her deteriorating conditions and other multiple complications throughout her remaining days of her life. At that time, what came to my mind was to sustain her life by doing all possible to care for her wholeheartedly.
    My only wish now is that I hope I can live my aging life's normalcy without dementia so as not to let my loved ones to care for me during the remaining time of my life's journey.

  • @laylinglim6833
    @laylinglim6833 Рік тому +3

    加油!加油!Daniel 👏

  • @lilykejia
    @lilykejia Рік тому +2

    A beautiful video and story that touched my heart.

  • @crystalyi1759
    @crystalyi1759 Рік тому +2

    Daniel, i hv prayd for u n yr parents n wl cntinue to pray for ur fam n work needs. Thank you for openly sharing as u r indirectly helpg new care givers too. In these 13yrs of filial piety n love, u hv bcm also a more attentv, undrstandg, listeng, observant individual. # u cd cnsidr a 2nd future career as a med socisl worker or sm career in health+patient care.

  • @nurmah.mohdyusoff2163
    @nurmah.mohdyusoff2163 Рік тому +2

    Subscribed., you've made my day. If you ever cried, silent the hurts and may times passing and heal slowly yet leave you with the tiniest spot for your rememberance of your dearly parents in next thousand years ahead. Remarkable journey.Tq for sharing publicly.

    • @imdaniellim
      @imdaniellim Рік тому +3

      Thank you watching, when working on this with the production team, something we coined is that, memories are frozen in photography, videos and in handwritten manuscripts. It is a legacy piece of work for daddy and mummy and something for me to remember them when it is all said and done.

    • @nurmah.mohdyusoff2163
      @nurmah.mohdyusoff2163 Рік тому +1

      a true good friend won't leave you during your struggle for help and that hurts, even a dog walking and running after you and cuddle you like mummy and daddy and that bring back all the joyfull memories back to those days when you were newly born. Stay strong.

    • @imdaniellim
      @imdaniellim Рік тому

      @@nurmah.mohdyusoff2163 Thank you for your kind words. Will treasure our moments.

  • @StarrySunnie
    @StarrySunnie Рік тому +4

    🥲🥲🥹 Mr. Daniel with friends s’ support have made much better progress in His Daddy, Mr. Peter’s to reduce worsening of Dementia…Commendable act with endless perseverance for his family 🙏🏽🙇🏻‍♀️❤️❤️❤️ The video touches me deeply and for a while, the problem is diminished. I Love Mr. Peter’s quote that he likes to sing and certainly agree singing does help to live up our spirits and reduce the problems impact 🥹🥹 Love the family portrait.
    One should definitely learn to be a caregiver like Mr. Daniel. May I wish Mr. Daniel and Family are always been blessed with Happiness.

    • @imdaniellim
      @imdaniellim Рік тому +3

      Morning Yessika, thank you for your kind words, for daddy, alot of it is about him being able to age-in-place among the community, especially within our very estate where we stay. Quality of life and dignity when ageing.

    • @StarrySunnie
      @StarrySunnie Рік тому +1

      @@imdaniellim I am very happy to receive your reply. You are right about it 🙏🏽🙇🏻‍♀️

    • @imdaniellim
      @imdaniellim Рік тому +2

      @@StarrySunnie Happy to engage in meaningful conversations. Person-centred care is important. In today's day and age, we administer the care we think they need, how often do we ask them, how they like to be cared for?.

    • @StarrySunnie
      @StarrySunnie Рік тому

      @@imdaniellim Thank you very much. You really touch my inner sense deeply 🥲 as I am still self-Centered

  • @sarayoung5281
    @sarayoung5281 Рік тому +1

    I’m also the sole caregiver for my dementia mom, I’ve been through all the struggles/soul searching & politics with the nursing home 🤧🤕

  • @ledamaria1825
    @ledamaria1825 Рік тому +4

    Wonderful !

    • @imdaniellim
      @imdaniellim Рік тому

      Thank you for watching, please help to spread the word and generate greater awareness of persons living with dementia and caregiving.

  • @168hugo
    @168hugo Рік тому +4

    This is a good video

    • @imdaniellim
      @imdaniellim Рік тому

      Thank you for watching. Cute little dog you have there.

  • @chopsticksforlegs
    @chopsticksforlegs Рік тому +2

    Husband material right there!!

    • @imdaniellim
      @imdaniellim Рік тому

      Thank you for watching and thanks for the compliment.

  • @peterzing7483
    @peterzing7483 Рік тому +5

    👍

    • @imdaniellim
      @imdaniellim Рік тому

      Thanks for the thumbs up. Means a lot to the family. You acts of kindness and affirmation, a simple symbol that no words can describe. Thank you!

  • @straitstimesonline
    @straitstimesonline  Рік тому +2

    WATCH: Building a more dementia-friendly society: ua-cam.com/video/rjzfHUu2-pk/v-deo.html
    VIEW THE INTERACTIVE: str.sg/dementia-inside
    For the latest news and videos follow ST on UA-cam: bit.ly/FollowST
    Turn on notifications 🔔 to stay updated.

  • @joanneng9145
    @joanneng9145 Рік тому

    I really pity such families, reminder to all of us to not burden children in financial and health aspects if possible

  • @crystalyi1759
    @crystalyi1759 Рік тому

    U also hv to learn fr tbe care gvr individuals hw to budget n b not shy in askg n learng abt budgetg eg. Biy panty/brief pampass for outg n cheaoer ones for home use frm tbe wholesalers.

  • @deelitetab1994
    @deelitetab1994 Рік тому

    Daniel ,you are a special being. We are the Foundera of
    CaringWheels, it's a social enterprise offering respite solutions for primary carers of dementia folks, like yourself. Our founders are sole carers of dementia mums over 90 years of age.. Can pm me privately.

  • @crystalyi1759
    @crystalyi1759 Рік тому +1

    When yr dad forgets the words of the songs, then u knw his disease has bcm worse.

  • @768jefiline7
    @768jefiline7 Рік тому

    No need friends, my experience, only money make me stress. I am a dementia care giver for ten years and now how many years more for a post covid? I love money only I am cool.

  • @crystalyi1759
    @crystalyi1759 Рік тому +4

    U r the only child, previously 2 adults look aftr 1 child but now its the reverse, one income to look aftr 2 elderly. U need to join a care giver support group n pwrhaps gt relief help fr yr relatvs n cousins who r more undrstandg esp teir siblgs bcos as the dmt disease progresses, tey wl keep askg you the same questn n u wl gt fedup repeatg the same answer eg. Where is so&so? # When ur $ is tight

  • @crystalyi1759
    @crystalyi1759 Рік тому +1

    Best let yr dad wear a silver bracelet w yr hp n address in case yr dad wandrs out n dnt knw hw to go hm or dnt knw hw to ring hm. So hopefully the public cd help call u. # for yr mum, slso let her wear a silvr bracelet tbat the public can see. # i did a chain for my 80+ aunt to wear as she gt lost. But she wore a button up samfoo blouse n the lady police officr didnt know abt her chain worn inside.

  • @crystalyi1759
    @crystalyi1759 Рік тому +2

    Daniel, u must b christian n filial. Fr age 29 n carg for yr aged parents for 13y, u r now 42y u now knw who r true frens r fr yr care gvg grp. Evn siblgs, cousins n relatvs can also disappt n shun u when tey knw u hv a tight budget need. # yr mum csn still help u take care of yr dad. But eventuslly u may hv to gt a maid for them whilst u work or put tbe more difficult parent in a subsidised nursg hm for a 5d wkly brief respite for yr own sanity. Its incnvenient as wkend u gt to vsit that parent, bit no choice, u cant taje care of 2 old babies.

  • @crystalyi1759
    @crystalyi1759 Рік тому +1

    Daniel, smtmes when u feel deoressd, sad or lonely n no one undrstands yr frustratns n difficulties, go for a cheap weekday cinema movie like a comedy to laugh n release yr stress. # also u can go funland n play those hittg games to vent yr frustratns or play squash, hit the ball as tho that is ur enemy, to release the stress.

  • @crystalyi1759
    @crystalyi1759 Рік тому +1

    For a man, u can still hgt marroed at 50yrs to a foreign bride, aftr yr parents r gone. But presently not advisable to fall in love or marry.