The Onion Reviews 'Rogue One'

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  • Опубліковано 2 лют 2025

КОМЕНТАРІ • 239

  • @roninreturns
    @roninreturns 5 років тому +330

    To be fair Peter K. Rosenthal, the box clearly stated, "8 Years and Up", and you finished it in only 5 1/2 years.

  • @BoffinGrusky
    @BoffinGrusky 8 років тому +993

    I couldn't put that damned puzzle together either. But mine had a picture of a tiger on the box and said "frosted flakes". What a ripoff.

    • @jimeponcho
      @jimeponcho 8 років тому +19

      bravo!

    • @FatYggdrasil
      @FatYggdrasil 8 років тому +19

      Quality

    • @roninreturns
      @roninreturns 5 років тому +7

      Imagine my shock when the puzzle came with a picture of Bruce Jenner on the box, and said "Wheaties". It looked nothing like either 'Rogue One' or Bruce when I finally managed to figure out where the extra pieces went, and I still had pieces left over.

    • @redpug5042
      @redpug5042 2 роки тому +1

      yeah, those ones are notorious for breaking while trying to assemble the puzzle. I've personally only gotten half the thing done, and it all looked the same. The thing doesn't even look like the tiger on the front!

  • @raythegardener
    @raythegardener 8 років тому +472

    This review should contain a "spoiler alert" warning. There are a number of things he says about the puzzle that I wouldn't want to know until I tried it. Now I don't even want to try. And I had deliberately avoided all of the jigsaw reviews. : (

    • @Mineav
      @Mineav 7 років тому +11

      Don't even attempt the puzzle. Not even once! It will ruin your life, as it has mine. I hope this message hasn't come too late, and you're living as a hobo like me as a result of that damn puzzle.

    • @SmittySmith14
      @SmittySmith14 8 місяців тому +1

      @@Mineav I actually got this puzzle after watching this video. It is as Peter describes it. It took my wife and I 3 hours to complete the boarder... THE BOARDER! All the pieces are the same and we still arn't sure all the pieces of the boarder are in the right spot because the pieces beside each other are identical and we will find out when we go into the puzzle if the boarder needs to be moved around..... It is a nightmare. Do NOT buy!!!!
      I hope this message saves one soul from this spawn of hell!

  • @Master_Therion
    @Master_Therion 8 років тому +857

    The problem is that you *tried* to complete the puzzle: Try not. Do... or do not. There is no try.

  • @MoovySoundtrax
    @MoovySoundtrax 8 років тому +430

    That puzzle is so dense. Every piece has so much going on.

    • @scottg4520
      @scottg4520 8 років тому +37

      It's sorta like poetry. It rhymes.

    • @csdude35
      @csdude35 7 років тому +2

      Greatest comment ever

    • @mudsky
      @mudsky 6 років тому +11

      VERY cool

  • @0mikeisonfire0
    @0mikeisonfire0 8 років тому +273

    Seriously though, the plot of that puzzle made no sense!

    • @krombopulos_michael
      @krombopulos_michael 8 років тому +32

      0mikeisonfire0 this puzzle was just a complete rehash of the original puzzle!

    • @Mineav
      @Mineav 7 років тому +6

      Still had a better love story than 'Twilight.' Well it did, okay! I'm just sayin'.

  • @squiddie96
    @squiddie96 4 роки тому +34

    My favorite thing about Peter's title "Onion Head Film Critic" is the implication that they have multiple film critics at the Onion

    • @nedludd7622
      @nedludd7622 2 роки тому +4

      Maybe it is meant to read "Onionhead Film Critic".

    • @sliceofheaven3026
      @sliceofheaven3026 Рік тому +2

      With Peter does one even need multiple critics? No one else can top Peter.

    • @gustavolopes5094
      @gustavolopes5094 3 місяці тому +1

      I mean... He can be the head critic with no other critics. It makes his resume look better.

  • @ComCodex
    @ComCodex 8 років тому +62

    That Darth Maul hologram puzzle still gives me chills to this day.

  • @adam145
    @adam145 8 років тому +208

    Has anyone realised that galaxy went into turmoil once Jar Jar stopped taking care of stuff?

    • @DonBarracuda117
      @DonBarracuda117 8 років тому +27

      Dude smoked too much weed.

    • @Dermaa
      @Dermaa 7 років тому +6

      George Lucas did say the JarJar is the key.

    • @yalkn2073
      @yalkn2073 6 років тому +2

      @@Dermaa No. Memory is the key

  • @okrajoe
    @okrajoe 8 років тому +98

    Rats, now I have to go buy that puzzle to see if Peter's review is fair.

  • @rojm
    @rojm 8 років тому +285

    contrary to popular opinion, i thought the puzzle was great. even though it was cryptic and hard to understand, the overall visuals soared beyond the boundaries of my imagination. thrilling, exciting, beautiful. 10/10

    • @albee1000
      @albee1000 7 років тому +6

      Personally, I think it was the best Star Wars puzzle since 2011's Empire Strikes Back 550 pc. release.

    • @r-zeatlfilms
      @r-zeatlfilms 4 роки тому +4

      Fuck you

  • @Moscato_Moscato
    @Moscato_Moscato 8 років тому +203

    I love the part when Jyn Erso looks at the camera and says "Trump is stupid"

    • @krombopulos_michael
      @krombopulos_michael 8 років тому +13

      Deebo Molina yeah definitely worth doing those last minute reshoots.

    • @deniseduran5180
      @deniseduran5180 8 років тому

      Deebo Molina u would

    • @VoodooV1
      @VoodooV1 8 років тому +25

      That bit where Darth Vader goes on EmpireTwitter and tweets about the unfair press distortions in regards to the Empire and that the Death Star totally wasn't destroyed, it's just a hoax perpetrated by the Hutts. Sublime!

    • @mantistoboggan5171
      @mantistoboggan5171 7 років тому +3

      oh my god, why hasn't there been a darth trump video, found somewhere on youtube, yet?
      at least a "darth vader reads trump quotes" video.
      i need to find james earl jones!

    • @ncc1701deee
      @ncc1701deee 7 років тому

      Yes, I noticed and admired that part also.

  • @1simo93521
    @1simo93521 8 років тому +87

    I feel your pain Peter, no man should have too suffer an uncompleted jigsaw (life).

  • @GregoryTheGr8ster
    @GregoryTheGr8ster 6 років тому +15

    This review isn't a parody. ITS PURE TRUTH! The puzzle is a travesty, and PETER DESERVES AN AWARD HERE!

  • @SeanUCF
    @SeanUCF 7 років тому +7

    The clever analogy of the puzzle being The Force Awakens had me in tears! 🤣🤣🤣

  • @Rwededyet
    @Rwededyet 8 років тому +58

    This review was very puzzling.

  • @RikerLovesWorf
    @RikerLovesWorf 8 років тому +54

    These videos are the reason I still subscribe to The Onion

    • @shilelea
      @shilelea 8 років тому +1

      Do they even make any other videos anymore

    • @Parmetheus
      @Parmetheus 8 років тому +2

      I think they were bought out or something and all the writers are now over at Clickhole

  • @solidsnake58
    @solidsnake58 8 років тому +36

    I was initially disappointed by premise of this one but then Rosenthal got me in the end. That does look like a frustrating puzzle. XD

  • @krombopulos_michael
    @krombopulos_michael 8 років тому +26

    I can't believe they did a last minute redesign of the puzzle to say "whiteI supremacy sucks" in large read test across the image of the death star. I was angrily shaking my white hooded robes at the news!

  • @superfisto
    @superfisto 8 років тому +22

    I want a jigsaw mosaic of Peter Rosenthal for Christmas!

  • @b.055-bot6
    @b.055-bot6 8 років тому +34

    the Onion Nevers fails to surprise me with it's film reviews.

  • @duanemiller5606
    @duanemiller5606 6 років тому +3

    Funny thing about this review it reminded me of a time when a restaurant critic reviewed a McDonald’s. This really happened. No joke. He complained that he didn’t get a parking space by the door and as a result he almost hit a kid. What did he think McDonald’s was going to do, have an employee stand in a space all day holding a sign that said saved for restaurant critic. And how was it McDonald’s fault that he almost hit a kid? Did he expect another employee to act as a crossing guard so no kids would run between the cars in a McDonald’s? Dude you’re at a McDonald’s you should know to watch for young kids. Seriously this really did happen and I laughed my butt off for years after. still laughing now at the stupidity of this food critic so thank you onion for reminding me of that food critic with this insightful review of this movie.

  • @spacecadet2827
    @spacecadet2827 8 років тому +16

    this is the only review that counts, lets face it

  • @Skaxarrat
    @Skaxarrat 8 років тому +8

    Still today, I wake up in the middle of the night screaming in cold sweat. My wife tries to cheers me up but nothing, nothing can vanquish the sorrow and nothingless that this fricking puzzle has brought to my life.
    The movie is cool.

  • @Klockwork13
    @Klockwork13 8 років тому +3

    It's just so funny when at 2:27 he breaks and admits that he just can't complete the puzzle

  • @The482075
    @The482075 2 роки тому +1

    Wasn't expecting this puzzling experience.

  • @TalesofStories
    @TalesofStories 8 років тому +2

    That "God Damn it" at the end sold it!!

  • @aardvarkmindshank
    @aardvarkmindshank 8 років тому +1

    He spoke now and still holds his piece.

  • @telmovaz
    @telmovaz 8 років тому +5

    this guy is a comedy genius. his delivery and timing is just perfect

  • @johnsmithfakename8422
    @johnsmithfakename8422 8 років тому +9

    I'm demanding more Onion news.

  • @sushanalone
    @sushanalone 7 років тому +4

    The cruel jokes that fate plays upon us, none more articulately manifest, when great pillars of tenacity like Peter Rosenthal crumble to dust against the ceaseless weathering of strong winds carrying minute grains of sand that chip away piece by piece, until nothing but an hollow husk of frustration and disappointment of a monument to endurance and willpower is left, full of hopeless dejection and a bottomless void, where once a fountain of hope, confidence and light once stood, feeding the fertile soils upon which the tender shoots of future would have sprouted.

  • @kharris3352
    @kharris3352 8 років тому +1

    The puzzle is so dense. Every piece has so much going on in it.

  • @Sebastian1786
    @Sebastian1786 8 років тому +6

    I wish more people would take cross media stuff as serious as Peter here, there constantly is an onslaught of good/mediocre/bad cartoons, video games, comics, sex toys, pajamas etc. made of any franchise and no one bats an eye, but as soon as another movie hits cinemas, everybody looses their minds.
    (I'm not just talking Ghostbusters, but in general. People seem to be fine ignoring 99% of the stuff, until that one new product hits that society has arbitrarily decided is canon even if most people don't like it).

  • @StingrayOfficial
    @StingrayOfficial 8 років тому +14

    Dude, dude...dude. You are so fucking funny I can't even handle it. Thank you for spreading happiness and laughter to the world that has internet and subscribed to The Onion or maybe people that have friends that share this kinda shit.

  • @lyssakate
    @lyssakate 6 років тому +1

    You are just a real treat Peter. I am binge watching all your reviews now sir

  • @CountObvious
    @CountObvious 8 років тому +1

    That holographic puzzle actually seems pretty cool

  • @codyolsen6373
    @codyolsen6373 7 років тому +1

    That last "Goddamnit!" is so good

  • @undertyped1
    @undertyped1 8 років тому +6

    I've tried to complete this puzzle as well, I spent every waking moment for 2 months on it. Turns out it wasn't a puzzle at all. Life can become a mystery with a mountain of meth and a few fridge magnets.

  • @baddiecentral22
    @baddiecentral22 8 років тому +9

    the next movie then. I hope we get new puzzles and better source material. I swear these people from Hollywood are slacking off these days

  • @bitspacemusic
    @bitspacemusic 8 років тому +1

    The hint to what tool you need in order to solve it is hidden in the name, 'jigsaw puzzle'.

  • @madnessbydesignVria
    @madnessbydesignVria Рік тому +2

    I'm so grateful Peter saved me the time I'd have wasted on this garbage. I'm returning the box unopened! Thanks, Peter! :)

  • @flipzilip7138
    @flipzilip7138 8 років тому +5

    Peter Rosenthal is my spirit animal.

  • @hellavadeal
    @hellavadeal 8 років тому +21

    Puzzling ain't it?

  • @matman000000
    @matman000000 7 років тому

    The puzzle gets a lot better the second time you piece it together.

  • @SophiaAphrodite
    @SophiaAphrodite 7 років тому +3

    I once put together a puzzle of Han Solo. It was very intimate and exciting. I never finished it because Han shot first. Ruined the whole thing.

  • @metalname69
    @metalname69 4 роки тому +2

    this review really needs a follow up

  • @comstr
    @comstr 8 років тому

    We had a copy of this picture. It was missing 6 pieces, had 3 duplicates and 1 piece that does not belong anywhere in the picture. I feel your pain.

  • @niallharrington3636
    @niallharrington3636 4 роки тому

    i just got that the 2011 puzzle was a reference to the fact the prequel trilogy and og trilogy got blu ray releases that year

  • @aguyfromnz537
    @aguyfromnz537 5 років тому +3

    i still refuse to watch any star wars movies after that fucking puzzle.

  • @NeoRipshaft
    @NeoRipshaft 6 років тому +2

    Photo-mosaic puzzles are pretty brutal in general, really.

  • @otter-pro
    @otter-pro 8 років тому +1

    Just found this on Amazon and the reviews also indicate the frustration of the puzzle pieces.

  • @HarbesonEarl
    @HarbesonEarl 8 років тому +2

    Great analysis as always, Peter.

  • @pernus5856
    @pernus5856 8 років тому +1

    Dont even get me started on my 1999 Jar Jar Binks puzzle! I STILL haven't completed the border on that fucking monstrosity.

  • @AbnormalWrench
    @AbnormalWrench 8 років тому +1

    I hope there is a follow-up for this review. I think he'll finish the puzzle. He's committed.

  • @bruhbruhhh6592
    @bruhbruhhh6592 2 роки тому

    As someone who suffered through the han solo and chewey mosaic puzzle for several months with my entire office I completely agree with this review.

  • @JurassicTrek
    @JurassicTrek Місяць тому

    A classic review that can never be tarnished…

  • @DjBaapreB
    @DjBaapreB 2 роки тому

    Puzzles come and go. The backstory of the mouse droid on the death star is eternal.

  • @613aristocrat
    @613aristocrat 2 роки тому

    How did it take me so long to note that Jan Urso is Kyle Katarn's pilot?

  • @CinematicAnimeTrailers
    @CinematicAnimeTrailers 8 років тому

    lmao the ending when he gets pissed!

  • @jonovankirk
    @jonovankirk 4 роки тому

    I want to make a 500 thousand piece puzzle with a blank box. The puzzle ends up spelling Drink Your Ovaltine

  • @scotchbonnet7
    @scotchbonnet7 4 роки тому +1

    One of the only film critics I trust.

  • @Gredddfe
    @Gredddfe 4 роки тому +1

    This guy can't be a Star Wars fan. He's rambling, he's incoherent, gets angry about the slightest details and can't move on from them, and references obscure things without explanation assuming that you're as deep into Star Wars as he is. Star Wars fans aren't like that.

    • @Gredddfe
      @Gredddfe 3 роки тому

      Come on man. That was so obviously sarcasm. Do I really need to point it out?

    • @Gredddfe
      @Gredddfe 3 роки тому

      @@Ignis_Infinitus_Infernus Keep talking pls.

    • @Gredddfe
      @Gredddfe 3 роки тому

      @@Ignis_Infinitus_Infernus When I woke up this morning you know what I thought? I really need someone to say something dumb to me, then pretend they meant to say it all along. Nothing makes me happier than seeing someone say "It's just a prank bro" whenever they're caught out saying something stupid.

    • @Ignis_Infinitus_Infernus
      @Ignis_Infinitus_Infernus 3 роки тому

      @@Gredddfe glad I could help

    • @Ignis_Infinitus_Infernus
      @Ignis_Infinitus_Infernus 3 роки тому

      @@Gredddfe I don't say anything stupid you're just not smart enough wolf runs with feather

  • @Phantom-hy2ix
    @Phantom-hy2ix 8 років тому +1

    This is so stupid.
    I came here to give my opinion of Rogue One as it had a reference to the movie. So here is my statement in all honesty.
    Impressive. Most impressive.
    I am one with the Force. The Force is with me.

  • @jbonedowning2996
    @jbonedowning2996 8 років тому

    that maul puzzle is cool af

  • @meavid
    @meavid 8 років тому +2

    There are alternatives to puzzling.

  • @keyboarddancers7751
    @keyboarddancers7751 4 роки тому +1

    This review is more entertaining than all of the latter movies in the franchise!

  • @andreamagni8017
    @andreamagni8017 8 років тому +1

    Well, the first third of the puzzle was not bad at all. Also from that point onwards you can easely complete it, like if you had done a very similar puzzle before.
    Make star wars great again

  • @MrJohanBD
    @MrJohanBD 8 років тому +4

    On a serious note tho Rogue one really did get my faith back into Disney's starwars I thoroughly disliked episode 7 but man I freaking loved Rogue one. Gold leader

    • @FirstNameLastName-pr7hs
      @FirstNameLastName-pr7hs 8 років тому +1

      What made you think this wasn't serious?

    • @MrJohanBD
      @MrJohanBD 8 років тому +1

      Hey Dumbass what even is this comment? XD obviously the review isn't serious however my fucking comment is. There for "on a serious note" means that I'm not joking I wanted to come and laugh about the video and added a comment giving my actual thoughts on it. How is that not clear?

    • @FirstNameLastName-pr7hs
      @FirstNameLastName-pr7hs 8 років тому +3

      You probably haven't even tried the puzzle... smh

    • @MrJohanBD
      @MrJohanBD 8 років тому

      Hey Dumbass Delivery man stole the puzzle not my fault >-

  • @KevinSmith-qi5yn
    @KevinSmith-qi5yn 8 років тому +2

    I am so gonna enjoy Rogue One when it is released on network television 10 years from now. So please don't show any spoilers.

  • @deedeewhipple4668
    @deedeewhipple4668 3 роки тому

    Wow, the man has feeling!

  • @sergio_jose
    @sergio_jose Рік тому

    2:13 i know this is a comedy video but that darth maul puzzle is fuckin sick

  • @jackjones4248
    @jackjones4248 8 років тому +1

    dat shitty kick at 0:06

  • @ArtDekko
    @ArtDekko 7 років тому +1

    Before this video I didnt even know those puzzles existed. Now I am going to go out and buy one. Thanks for nothing!

  • @isjackin1or2
    @isjackin1or2 8 років тому +2

    i love this man .just perfect

  • @03Grunt-arrino
    @03Grunt-arrino 7 років тому

    God Dammint YOU ARE SO GOOD Mr Rosenthal

  • @qiai1750
    @qiai1750 8 років тому

    I got that puzzle done in 13 hours

  • @StRanGerManY
    @StRanGerManY 4 роки тому

    Change the "puzzle" for Disney sequels. Makes perfect sense.

  • @scottscott178
    @scottscott178 8 років тому +4

    Stand alone, you mean "disposable". What I don't understand is why, despite characters like general grievous, the droid clans, light sabre builders that are sith etc. Why are all the creative empire talent not scientists who can build a Death Star? Why does the Death Star creator need to be a good guy? Why capture the guy with the idea? Why not just capture the idea and use it as your own? There will be no faults with it, no Achilles heal. So did Star killer base get built by another captured good guy scientist? It sickens me that the empire has no scientific talent, that only a good guy held against his will has the idea to use a light sabre as a planet sized weapon. Did the empire not think they could build a planet sized blaster? Instead of a light sabre?

    • @willoliver8167
      @willoliver8167 6 років тому

      Scott Scott first of all this is the onion. Second of all, it is very common throughout history for fascist type empires to immediately get rid of many of their intellectual scientists and struggle to reconstruct their ideas. Case in point The Nazis, who in all of their antisemitism caused Albert Einstein to flee the country. Robbing them of the man who would go on to be crucial in the creation of the most powerful weapon in human history. It's highly likely the same thing is true in the empire.

  • @spiddyman0079
    @spiddyman0079 6 років тому

    This guy and will Ferrell should have a movie

  • @sonnyjimnajam
    @sonnyjimnajam 8 років тому +1

    LOL - This video makes life worth living again.

  • @louveteau3333
    @louveteau3333 7 років тому +1

    I hope one day The Onion will learn how to do comedy

  • @johnlee7164
    @johnlee7164 7 років тому

    subtle, Peter, very subtle.

  • @crypticraps
    @crypticraps 6 років тому

    I had that Darth Maul puzzle :)

  • @SocialWorkProfessor
    @SocialWorkProfessor 2 роки тому

    That puzzle ruined my childhood.

  • @kwijung
    @kwijung 8 років тому +1

    Good to see The Onion can still produce funny material!
    Too bad nobody is watching anymore because of... well, all that other stuff that happened.

    • @kwijung
      @kwijung 8 років тому +1

      The Onion was bought by a wealthy Hillary Clinton supporter and they quickly started pumping out painfully unfunny garbage and making pro-Hillary "jokes". For a while there it was looking like all of the funny people had left.

  • @Aldaboy
    @Aldaboy 8 років тому

    This video actually made me buy that puzzle.

  • @arcticwulf5796
    @arcticwulf5796 6 років тому

    Hahahaha the 100 piece puzzle was done wrong :D!

  • @busterhymen5203
    @busterhymen5203 8 років тому +1

    I laughed so hard I fell off my taun taun

  • @maxattax5390
    @maxattax5390 8 років тому +1

    I get it. Star wars puzzle started sucking asses when Disney got the market. Damn im pissed about it too.

  • @Xanofar
    @Xanofar 7 років тому

    If you're actually looking for a good puzzle, avoid a puzzle with large areas all the same color.

  • @spyczech
    @spyczech 4 роки тому

    In his defence a mosaic puzzle is a terrible idea

  • @SmashChachi
    @SmashChachi 8 років тому

    I've built one of those puzzles before:(

  • @glencannondr
    @glencannondr 7 років тому

    Peter Rosenthal = ok at speed dating

  • @moistnugget4147
    @moistnugget4147 4 роки тому

    I feel you Rosenthal

  • @thebeatles9
    @thebeatles9 8 років тому

    how?? how not more views?? People share ffs this is funny!!!

  • @safayi
    @safayi 8 років тому

    ok I have to get this puzzle!!!!

  • @downunder211
    @downunder211 7 років тому

    The way Peter's eyes switch focus from the camera to the script/teleprompter/etc. is slightly weirding me out lol. Maybe it's the intense, slightly wide-eyed and creepy gaze. Sorry the puzzle didn't go well dude. Better luck next time?

  • @masterthnag105
    @masterthnag105 8 років тому

    props to this.

  • @Jebu911
    @Jebu911 2 роки тому

    I love how the "puzzle" is just a reference to the shitty starwars 7

  • @Marchant2
    @Marchant2 8 років тому

    All this back and forth, sequel, prequel - is frustrating. But at least they didn't ruin it with a brand new reset button/timeline like they did to Star Trek. Nothing will ever equal the first 3 Star Wars when it comes to chemistry between the main characters and even between the secondary characters. The newer installments don't have that.