Taking it Slow • Life update from my messy room, living w sadness, & new friends 🌳VLOG
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- Опубліковано 22 сер 2024
- Hello Friends, thank u for being part of my journey 🍃 This video is sponsored by BetterHelp. click here for 10% off your first month - www.betterhelp... 🌷
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it feels nice to be caught up on work, in my slightly cleaner home (finally mopped yesterday) and see the first leaves begin to turn yellow. autumn is my favorite season, and i can't wait to spend it in nyc for the first time. what are some videos you'd like to see from me? i'm brainstorming... as i'll still be doing vlogs, but want to switch it up once in a while.
happy mid-autumn moon festival❤️this year will be the first in so long that i'm celebrating. i'll vlog and be sure to share w you. until next time, take care lovely 🌞 Love, Annabelle
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as tender as it may be to share i'm so touched by your words about your dad. my mom is terminally ill and her sadness becomes my sadness a lot of the time. you have such a wonderful presence on youtube i'm so glad to share this space with you!
I send you much tenderness and courage 💗
been anxious since last week, today i spent the whole day feeling awful. the moment she said "being sad is not weakness" i boiled up to tears. i wish i could finish the video now but i'm still too anxious, my attention span is little. but thank you annabelle, for always sharing and making us feel warm and understood. learning to be okay with taking space and accepting my emotions. i am happy you're doing good.
I completely understand. I'm moving out tomorrow and I've spent the last week repeatedly breaking down from fear and overthinking everything to the point that I can't breathe. I read in a book about dealing with anxiety that you should treat it like a friend that's just trying to protect you rather than something you need to push away. I found it a comforting concept so hopefully it can help you too, even just a little 🥰
@@darcyjohnson871 I moved out in May so I can only imagine your anxiety. But you'll have so much fun and discover so much about you, also you should be proud you were able to take such step! I am currently starting therapy again with a new doctor and I love her already so much so I'm working slowly to be better, we can do this. I'll remember to treat it as a friend.
this resonated with me in a weird way as i’ve been grieving future loss of my loved ones since I was a kid even though there’s no sickness or death happening in my life it’s just an anxiety that i’ve dealt with since i understood mortality. watching you go through this is hard to watch as it brings up my own fears however hearing you talk about how you’re creating something beautiful from this brings me hope and peace. wishing you the best
this; the anxiety over mortality is so overwhelming sometimes, it just feels better if I could just go together at the same time as my friends and loved ones T_T
I feel this all the time! It's crazy to me that all of us humans go about this life without acknowledging/accepting our inevitable ends. It's such a difficult thing to live with and I feel like it would be a lot easier if it wasn't such a taboo subject (at least in American culture because that's my own perspective).
this... this is exactly how i feel, and you've put it into perfect words. often i wonder how different my life would (could) be if my heart and mind weren't so fixated on my grief of the future loss of my parents; i feel so selfish this way? and yet i know all my loved ones would want for me is to go out and fully live my life. but still that anxiety and fear lives with me every day. the uncertainty the past 2 years has brought certainly hasn't helped any. it's all very odd, and quite hard to express... anyway, i hope to gather courage and peace along the way, and hope the same for you as well.
just got to the part talking bout your dad.. I'm really struggling with the loss of my dad. He was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and then 2 months later was gone - I wish, so badly, that I'd known how to tell him what he meant to me beyond a simple 'I love you' - I'm not sure I could've known until he was gone. He was my best friend and everything I do marks me with grief: going to see a movie I'd have watched with him, playing board games I'd have played with him, eating nice food that he no longer gets to enjoy... I'm glad you're no longer afraid and I too think in its own way, it's a good thing to be sad - your dad knows how much you ove him for it - wishing you all the best x
Thank you for sharing yourself with us.
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First time commenter, but longtime viewer! I was especially taken with your bravery in expressing how vulnerable and anxiety-inducing it can be to make space in the world for you to be sad or to feel grief. I found you my first year of college four years ago when my mom was diagnosed with terminal brain cancer. I also didn’t know what to do with the heavy weight of the fear and sadness that came with that news, but watching you go through college and share the heavy weight you were carrying (in no matter how brief a clip or scene) gave me so much strength. You make me feel not so alone and we’re a huge part in me finding the strength to carry the weight of my sadness. Anyways, before I ramble on too much, I just really want to thank you for being vulnerable with us and no matter how you choose to express it, if you do, know that I am forever grateful. 💛
i sent the quote "what is grief if not love persevering?" when you asked for quotes on your ig! im glad you used it and it resonated with you, im so happy you are going through this growth phase and that you are finding and learning healthy ways to cope with your emotions ♡
Isn’t that from Wandavision
yes!
I never really watched your videos before but for some reason you seem really alive in this video and I really like that. btw I work at MoMA PS1 glad that you visited! :)
Covid made me realise how much i actually depend on people around me mentally 🥲 randomly sharing it's kinda sad to feel this lonely alone
you're not alone! I reach out to my friends more so during covid lockdown than ever. vice versa. I think its normal to feel this way, so pls don't feel bad about needing to rely on others
@@Tiffany-dw1yp 🫂💓🌼
It’s hard. I feel you ❤️🩹
I just lost my dad less than 2 months ago. He was also ill for a long time. Kidney failure. He was in and out of the hospital for treatments and dialysis and eventually had to be on a wheelchair due to an ankle injury. My papa was a big guy who was so independent and happy and lovable. It was really difficult coz he still wanted to do a lot of things himself, with the pride that dads have. I'm just glad I got to spend the last few years with him at home (since he used to work abroad) so I don't have a lot of regrets.
Thank you for reminding me it's okay to feel sad. With everything going on in the world, it felt selfish to care about myself but this grief is just a testament of how much love I have for him.
What I can say though, is that no matter how much we prepare for an ill loved one to pass, it's never as we expect it to be.
I hope you all get to spend time with your loved ones more. Stay safe always. 😢💜
September is the month when my father tragically went into a coma after cardiac arrest just after turning 45 to die 4 months later.
I cry every time you talk about your father. I would cry even if my father didn't die, because it seems like he loves you so much. Something I've never known. It's beautiful.
Thank you for sharing with us, as always.
Since March of this year I've been going through what I like to call my early 20's reset. Now that I'm out of college and trying to exist in the adult world and all this craziness is happening at the same time, I am also experiencing high amounts of anxiety, was depressed for nearly a year, and had to remove alot of toxic people from my life and get out of situations that I sat in because I didn't want to 'disrupt' anything. I feel like so many of us early 20's new adults are changing the game, we are healing our anxieties, our patterns that no longer serve our higher self, and facing our sadness and uncomfortable feelings head on and saying "nope, this shit is going to get fixed now". It feels like a energetic reset. It feels like cleansing. I wish you so much luck and peace in your journey
my grandfather died due to cancer 2 months ago. your words about your dad really helped me. i just want to say thank you
i love that butterfly light, "your lack of energy isn't laziness you are over your bandwidth"... I think i really need that.
I'm always incredibly awkward with comments but I couldn't leave the video without saying how much I enjoy and appreciate every single one of your videos
Even though my current situation is totally different from yours (teen student , still living with my family), I can relate to most of the things you said. For years I've been bottling up emotions and feeling guilty about showing to others my "not so happy side", but only recently I started to notice how bad this is for my health. I'm glad that you realised it too before it became a habit that you cannot control anymore.
I've also been following you for years now, and seeing that you're accepting your emotions and giving space to your personal growth almost makes me proud (and you should be prud of yourself too for what you've become).
Please never stop being so human and honest, and feel free to share your ups and downs with us.
Sending love from Italy
thank you for this
I've been feeling very anxious, stressed, and just sad lately. In the past few days I've had some self realizations that have helped me out. This video was comforting and made me realize that other people are worried about the same things I am. It was very nice and calming to take a few minutes out of my day and watch this. Thank you, as always, Annabelle.
It's amazing how gentle you are with your grief. When I knew my mom was dying, I bottled up all this sadness and didn't acknowledge it at all, it made everything so much more difficult. It'll be two years without her today, but love is indeed persevering
Any time I see your father on camera, it’s always some kind of precious moment of him. The same with the rest of your family and friends. Even though he’s been sick since I’ve followed you the last several years, hearing you speak about it still just makes my chest feel tight, like I could just sob. It’s like the father of a friend to me, even though I just watch you on UA-cam. I’m so happy for you that you’re figuring out your feelings with his illness and how to cope. You’re a very strong person that I admire for many reasons (that being one of them). Thinking of you this week and thank you for sharing with us as always, Annabelle. I know you will only continue to go from where you are now. 💞
9:10 "I'm being more comfortable with saying 'hey yeah I need help'". A strong reminder to us all that we probably collectively thought 'you amazing, strong person, I'm so proud of you'.
Thank you for being open and sharing your thoughts with us. You inspire me to be gentle with myself and to accept the journey with all its bumps 💕
Curentlly went back to college after one and a half years and feeling lonely as heck, needed this 💞
Oh college loneliness is so rough, you are surrounded by people but don't have any close relationships! But awesome that you are doing college I'll be an internet friend if you need one❤️💜❤️❤️
@@kathrynhull3257 ay les be internet friendos 😆
My dad is terminally ill as well, its really helps to hear you speak about your experiences so opently. I might as well look for help from a psychologist, thanks for this insight. Really enjoy watching your volgs! All the best! 🐱🍀
"It doesn't come naturally to me, it doesn't mean I don't enjoy it." I don't know why, but that line really stuck with me.
My dad is also terminally ill, and at age 25 I never thought I would be grappling with my dad dying. It is such a complex issue, and I really resonated with the process you shared about leaning into the sadness about your dad. I am on my own journey with it, but being away from him while he is struggling is still really hard for me. Sending you and your dad love, I know how hard it is
this made me tear up a bit to be honest. but not in a bad way, kind of like in a comforting way.
9:53 literally made me burst into tears
these words are so, so true.
Pyper you will probably not realize how much I needed this video. Thank you for addressing sadness ❤️
hi, Annabelle. I used to watch all of your vlogs and felt so inspired by your humanity and candor, this was for years. Then, we kind of fell appart for months (lol). Today, I have found you again and I'm really happy I decided to click on a video of yours and get to be in your company for awhile. I've been through a rough patch, but actually yesterday i re-began therapy so maybe it was the moment for me to find your internet corner again! Everything falls into place!! Much love xx
it feels really reassuring to know that we’re not alone in our experiences. I think the therapy part hit me most because I’m going through a lot of self-discovery too and admitting that sometimes I might not always be in the right or that I’m more closed off than I realized… but I know we’ll see this through and grow and learn more! I’m sure this wasn’t easy, so thank you so much for sharing with us, annabelle ;;
Annabelle, when I realized keeping up my habits streaks was making me anxious I thought something was wrong with me. Like, why do I feel pressured if it's supposed to be encouraging to see the streak rising? :( it made me feel less alone when you said you deal with this too, thank you for opening up! so simple, yet heartwarming
idk why but these vlogs always make me cry. like i long so much for having my own place one day and being able to take my time with growth and projects and have a cute cat and try to take care of a plant and have my stupid little print shop. i live vicariously through these vlogs kind of. i really like them, thank you for making the content that you make ;)
thank you for sharing. got emotional when you were talking about your dad. made me called my dad who i’m kind of distant with.
When you showed the black tie I was like 😲 "Yo you work fast, how did you get black belt already?"
I'm having a hard time for a few months now and your channel is my safe space. Thank you so much for sharing this wonderful video, take care always! I love you.
You're not alone, I've been feeling the same way but medication is helping me a bit so fingers crossed !
@@Lina-jx5pt i'm happy that your medication is helping you, i hope you will feel better more ❤️
@@sinclaire2689 awh your response made me smile. Thank you so much for your kindness xx !
thank you for sharing & being vulnerable 💛
its okay to feel sad and vulnerable, especially when one of your loved ones is terminally ill. When my dad was sick, i also felt sad and a bit angry of the situation, bc i wanted him to be okay, and every days passing it felt like it was getting worse, until he finally passed away. Its just something we need to face and overcome with, and as hard as it can be, your dad knows that you love him so much and you know he loves you too. Im sending you loads of virtual hugs!! Thankyou for sharing this with us Annabelle! xx
As the main caregiver for my mom in her last few years, I felt so many emotions. In which, all that stem from the hurt I felt for her. Like, how could this person who gave me life and everything off her back, go through this? Witnessing her being ill and witnessing her death was so hard and there's no doubt that I still feel traumatized. Though I'm still sad, I appreciate the time I had with her. I appreciate the love and warmth she gave. And to know she's no longer in pain really helps me move on with life. Life is filled with many ups and downs and I commend you for showing us that💛
It feels so much as if im growing with & alongside you and your channel and it's a happy realisation
Your vlogs bring out so many emotions within me. Thank you for always having us on your journey
you have no idea how much strength you bring to me for years now, I admire your courage for living your life the way you do, your are an inspiration even though you are having hard times, sending hugs
thank you so much milica, for your years of viewership and support! it means so much. sending love
what a nice, comfortable space this community annabelle has created is
I'm really appreciate your openess and that you decided to show this facette of you and your life. It gives me comfort and makes me feel more okay with my not-okayness ♡ much love
I always look forward to your videos every week. I have anxiety and depression, watching your videos helps me calm my nerves. Your roadtrip videos especially allowed me to travel through you. I have been an avid viewer since your college days. Keep up the good work Annabelle. Love uu
I understand the switching counselors thing :/ the law switch sucks! As long as you keep going with your healing and self-wellness journey though, it’ll all be okay :) . I appreciate your vulnerability in your vlogs too.
In the description box it mentions to drop some video ideas. Your content is very nice how it is now, but I remember you have posted some every-blue-moon singing videos in the past. Maybe that would be nice in the rotation every once in a while?
You are a sweet, caring, and loving girl…..everything will be ok.
I don't know how to explain how this video saved my day day. I've been feeling sad all week I don't know why. But the moment I saw this on my recommend, I suddenly remembered OH SHIT! I FORGOT HOW MUCHO I LOVE ANNABELLE how could I forget how happy she made me feel.
It was like watching a long time friend it was so strange !! But I'm happy for her and I'm happy that I found her again I won't leave again I promise 🧚♂️.
I hope that you reading this comment is having a wonderful day/night and that it's okay to be sad too. You're valid 🌺
Annabelle!!!
the art pieces you showed at 10:34 are pieces by Niki de Saint Phalle - she's my favorite artist! (and I live in NYC) Do you know what the name of the museum was??
We are not alone, sending all my love to all of you xx!
Thank you for your vulnerability. I feel like I've grown so much side by side with you. And it's like I had a friend to accompany me along the way ❤️
Thank you Annabelle! Thank you for being open with us
it warms my heart to hear everything you said about becoming more open and softening, though i know you are going through a tough process right now. i am so proud of you and it's been an honor to be on this journey with you, i think i have evolved along with you. so many fun moments in this video as well, i'm leaving with a smile on my face! thank you and see you next time 🤍
thank u so much for your kind words! 🥲❤️ its a joy to share my journey with u. sending sm love your way.
@@annabellegao sending heaps of love your way in return as well 🥺❤️
I feel like since I have been watching you, since your move to New York you have really opened up to us in a new way! Also, you're making me feel better about my crazy coarse curly hair because I have always wanted straight hair. Your hair is so beautiful, and just know the grass is always greener on the other side!!!!
Thank you Annabelle for sharing your thoughts. I am going through the same thing with my dad and I am feeling the same way. Sending much love
after a stressful day at work this is exactly what i need to wind down
Ahhh the WandaVision quote gets me every time T-T
I can relate to you even more now because my almost 4 year relationship just ended and I just graduated recently, so I am trying to figure out who I am in this city, trying to make new friends and focus on hobbies like sewing. From the videos I have seen, I always thought you guys were such a perfect match, and I felt the same. My ex and I had the same age difference as you guys and started dating almost at the same time. He was a very tall guy too and got along so well with my family. I just never imagined it would end. We had future plans. But everything is gone now. It is almost harder to accept because none of us did anything wrong. I feel a bit lonely, but I am working through it. Also I have a very ill parent that has caused me a lot of trauma, but I also have to acknowledge that it is not their fault. It is hard.
oof the title hit me hard already. i too am sad and sitting in my messy room.
You’re doing so well, I wish you all the best Annabelle ❤️❤️
this is definitely one of my favorite vlogs from annabelle 💛
Really moved by this video. Been following you since you started college and my fave videos are the ones where you are really raw
just thank you
❤️❤️❤️❤️
I know this is an older video, and I never comment online so this might be awkward lol but I just wanted to say thank you for sharing your feelings about your dad. My mom is currently terminally ill and I’ve also been dealing with the sadness that comes with that. I haven’t let her see me sad because I don’t want her to feel guilty or like she’s causing me to be sad. I’ve been dealing with it alone but this has me thinking I need to share it with her so that she knows how much she means to me. Thank you.
I completely get how you’re feeling. Adulthood can feel very lonely and it so so normal to wake up feeling meh. You’re doing great tho, and I have no doubt that this is apart of your blossoming. Also, ladybugs are very lucky! Good fortune is coming your way 🐞 sending love 💕
thank you for sharing these inner thoughts annabelle!
14:33 to 14:34 actually made me chuckle
Loved this one! ❤️ it’s ok not to be okay ✅ you can work hard and also rest and procrastinate, it’s all part of the process.
The part when you were talking about your dad was so touching, thank you for sharing that, vulnerability is strength, right?
ladybugs are signs of good fortune!
I know how you feel. My mother is dying slowly after being ill with bone marrow cancer almost 11 years now. Sending you lots of love Annabelle. Enjoy your life in a different city, even though you live apart from your family. Our own time apart helps us to get through the hard times. Even though we love our loved ones, especially our parents, we also need to continue our lives. Sadness is unavoidable part of the process. One needs to cry and be sad to be strong. Emotions vary each day. We need to live them through to be strong. Lots of hugs Annabelle.❤️
Sending love to anyone feeling down rn 💕 we can get through this
any day with Annabelle upload is a good day!
thank you! I always love your videos!
This felt really positive for me to watch. Thank you. Wishing you joy.
Yaaayyy nyc diaries continue 😍😍
Annabelle~ I so so appreciate all your vlogs and being so open with us. I just moved to NYC myself and don't have many friends so I feel some of the same feelings as u during these transitional times. thanks for capturing that feeling of living alone in the city so honestly.
thank you for sharing, makes me feel seen and not alone. i love you, i support you.
Thank you, I love you!
always a lovely time spent watching your vlogs
the way i was just watching your last video, now i cant wait to watch this one💘💘
hello from singapore at 2:42am HAHA
I've always loved the music you use on your vlogs, especially the last one on this one was so good. It would be lovely if you could share a playlist someday. 💗
Thank you so much for this video. Wishing you the best and cheering you on
ive been binging ur videos lately (starting with december dailies of 2018? or maybe 2017? lol) & next up is ur big moving to nyc video. it's nice to see where you are in real time tho
I love this, thanks for always sharing your beautiful thoughts. You are such a beautiful spirit
such a relaxing vlog
sending sm love to you
You really just made me tear up, haha. Your words really resonated with me and I just want to thank you for sharing your thoughts and feelings with us
Yayy new vlog
the whole video was very sincere but i laughed so hard when you pulled out that drawer and a cat was in there
HEHE yes, i love that part and crack up every time myself xD
Great video!
I’m saving your last vlog for a tough day the one with luke
big hug anna thoughts and prayers
thank you
I said ✨"loaf"✨ at the same time you did at 16:56
I like Claire de lune I used to listen to it
Much love from Mauritius 😍❤️
i love you!
❤
we have the same birth chart omg omg
I have super thick hair and I hate it. My hair is past my shoulders but when I braid it my braids looks so weird proportionally because they’re so thick. It also takes forever to air dry I’m talking 1-2 days if it’s up. I always ask hairdressers to thin it out but they never do it enough
Hi Annabelle, I don't think I was aware that your father is terminally ill. I am so sorry to hear it. Your words to your father certainly hit the spot. Of course you are sad, and I believe we should talk about it more often. Thank your for sharing your story!