self healing & the reality of being single in my late twenties
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- Опубліковано 29 вер 2024
- spend a week with me: self care, mental health routines, photoshoot prep, and more
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That guy is bad news. Not respecting your boundaries is a huge red flag.
My boyfriend (32m) and I (35f) live the slow life, its wonderful. We cook, we take long hikes, go to the beach, dinners, we workout, we snowboard, Ive always hated bars and going out, he loved the nightlife, but ended up loving the lifestyle I cherished, we’re now looking for homes together ❤ good men are out there, keep looking!
Sounds good✨
Awww Kendall you’re breaking my heart. It makes me sad to see you sad and trying to keep it together. Sometimes it’s ok to be by yourself for a while to really discover who you are as a person. You most certainly don’t have to settle for guys that cannot respect your boundaries. Also, you have an old soul which is fine because I myself have always had an old soul. You’re also introverted like me and probably don’t like to date, which is something I too struggled with and thought I would be alone forever. Just focus on you right now and love on yourself right now, and the right one will come into your life. Prayer also works, bring all your problems to the Lord Jesus and He can deliver you out of sadness and loneliness. Proverbs 3:5,6. If you feel like no one in the world loves you or understands you, just know that the Lord loves you and cares and wants you to depend on Him. God bless you! I’ll keep you in my prayers.
thank you for the love! i appreciate you so much
@@kendelkay you are very welcome
Love the grandma vibes 🥹 can totally relate. What helped me while dating was communicating that I would like a few date options to choose from or telling him what I liked/didn’t like doing. I’m not much of a drinker so I mentioned that as well. It gave me some control in the process so I wouldn’t get stuck in an uncomfortable situation like you did!
Also, just a thought, stress from dating or other life factors could be causing bloating :) our bodies are very wise!
Sending hugs
🎀✨️🫶🏻☀️💖
Are you still friends with cass?
Don’t be afraid to suggest day dates! That’s how my fiancée and I got to know each other when we started dating 💗
As she said, suggest day dates that don’t involve drinking or partying. Golfing, pitch & putt, surfing lesson, hike & lunch, beach walk & lunch, Theme park (silly but fun), bike a trail, sea-doo, etc
That guy and his boundary pushing ... no wonder you felt depleted. I'm sorry. Hopefully you get good people and good rest ❤
Definitely. You really shouldn’t have to say ‘no’ so many times.
Literally my thoughts the whole time. Socializing can actually be quite invigorating when it’s with the right person / people. Calling an uber back to his place without asking her first is a major turn off
No means no. That guy is a red flag!
When I was in my later 20's I had a bad breakup with a guy I had wanted to spend my life with too. I tried to make it work, tried to get back with him but I ultimately decided that, even though I had had such high hopes for our future, the people that we were were not maturing in the same direction and we were not going to be happy together. I was really upset by this breakup, cried a lot and felt really lonely all the time. I had always struggled with making good friendships because I am pretty introverted. The friendships I did seem to make were with people that treated me like shit for really no reason. After that breakup I decided that I needed to find happiness in myself, I needed to find joy in my loneliness. So I decided that I would no longer date until I felt like I could be perfectly happy being alone forever, that way I wouldn't be relying on getting all my happiness from the other person.
I took 4 years off of dating before I knew that I was going to be ok being alone. I used that time to try out new hobbies, new routines, try new foods, learn new skills, enjoy all the little joys in life, just reinvest in myself. I stopped telling myself "No" and "We shouldn't do that now" and I just started doing the things I wanted to do. It took a little while, maybe a year, to start really enjoying my time alone but once I did it was really great.
I did eventually meet my spouse. I really considered turning him down when he asked me out but I thought "eh. He's nice and I like being his friend. Why not?". We have now been together 10 years. If it ended tomorrow, I would be very sad but I know I would be ok. I love him a lot but he is not my main source of happiness, I am.
That was said beautifully. I'm in my being alone stage right now, trying many new hobbies and finally finding joy in activity. Never been better. ❤
A List of Sober Dates-
push for dates in the day time that involve NATURE: Grab ice cream/coffee/smoothies & hit up a nature trail at a public park, beach & lunch date. Museum (history art science), aquarium, picnic in the park. Petting farm, strawberry picking, an outdoor yoga class, outdoor food/art festival, or a a fair/carnival, botanical gardens.
Hi Kendel! Will there be more episodes of sitting pretty podcast?
hi yes hoping to do a season 2 this fall!
Kendel, I've been wanting to ask something for some time now and hesitated to. If you don't answer it's ok. Do you no longer have a friendship going on with Cassie?
This is such a mature and thoughtful vlog. Thanks kk!
I got married at 22, divorced at 28. Now I’m 39 and found the most perfect man who proposed to me after two months. Looking back, you seriously change SOOO much from your 20’s to your 30’s. You have so much time. Dont rush and you’ll find the right guy so you hopefully don’t have to go through a divorce. I would say make sure you know yourself, are happy with yourself and can take care of yourself before dating anyone seriously. Without those 3 things, you’ll most likely end up in an unhealthy relationship or with an unhealthy dynamic.
thank you for your wisdom
Come unto me, all ye that Labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light. Matthew 11:28-30
Girl you shouldn’t agree to go over to a man’s house before you have at least dated him for a month. Then they respect your boundaries and value you more. Ask for a car or for them to drive you there and back. There’s nothing wrong with saying no. That’s not okay if he was trying to pressure you so much.
Makes you be seen as more wifey in my opinion. Someonetimes if you hold out on giving them cookies for 1month-3 then they really fall for you.
Do what feels right to you. I don’t always do that but when I do it makes the right guy want to commit to you if you want that with him.
Also saying I love to cook and nurture. If you really want to be a wifey you can say I only will cook all of the time /be feminine/ move in with a guy that is intentional about dating me and proposes. I hope this helps you ❤ there’s nothing wrong with no being the nice girl but the kind girl.
You are so beautiful and have a big heart. You deserve healthy boundaries and love that is good and values you.
I do this / sometimes wear baby pink. Always have deep vulnerable conversations. Men always tell me they “think I’m the one” and talk about proposing.
I would recommend hinge people are more serious about finding a life partner on there. Don’t be afraid to share who you really are with people. The deep feelings and thoughts you dont normally share with everyone if that person feels safe. It helps people to fall in love ❤with
I hate living alone too I know how you feel. I feel like it is worth holding out for the right one who you fall in love with and treats you the way you deserve ❤
there's definitely a guy out there that would love to live a healthy life with you and go to bed early, and avoid drinking too much! ❤ I feel like a guy a little younger than you might be more like that. so many millennials are big drinkers but gen z is way more into health
Will the podcast be coming back?
Congratulations on 25k🎉 Love your vlogs Kendel❤
Why aren't you friends with Lindsay and Marli?
love your honesty and transparency in your vlogs, and your efforts to keep taking care of yourself through this hard year is so admirable. hope things get better and things often feels the hardest just before it gets amazing. last six months i have dealt with an extremely tough breakup and what i learned is that everything happens for a reason and life tends to let go of things to make space for even better things. you got this ❤️
Maybe you should date older, guys who are past the party stage. I mean if a prospect offers plans that include the word "DJ" it already sounds like it's outside of your boundaries lol I enjoy...no...require my quiet time 🙂You'll have to find a guy who's chill, sometimes they act all go-go-go because they think that's what the girls want. We're complex...ugh...lol :-))))))
lol you are so right!
Hi kendel, I love your vlogs 💖 always look forward to watching them. Don't be afraid to try dating. Grandma's time is fine, but also give yourself time for meeting someone. It could be the best decision you make. ❤ try pen pals 😊 it's also a good way of making friends. ❤
Traditional Medicines Everyday Detox tea is amazing. I use the Lemon one and it has a bunch of amazing herbs that debloat me after 1 cup!
IDK how you've gone so long without a car! I'd be depressed without a car!
side note: I know you were popular in HS, super social in college, I'm not sure what your life was like 2019-2021 in LA/OC, but I know you've said you dropped your life and all of your friends to live with your BF in PR, now he broke up with you and you are where you are. You even said in your podcast that you should put your bf over your friends, which is not healthy. You don't always need a bf in your 20's, but you always need friends. PLEASE take this as a learning lesson moving forward to never put your BF before everyone else and become solely emotionally dependent on him. I've been there and I've seen my other girlfriends do that same and it never ends well, you end up lonely and sad. So please try to be social and make friends...AND when that next guy comes around, DON'T drop everyone else just for him. A boyfriend should complement your life, not be your entire life.
thank you love
She got that perfect body!
Heading to Encinitas tomorrow.....first stop is Juanita's!! 😜
I love your vlogs, back when you were viral for the stay-at-home gf vlogs it’s because it was you. You’re the one that makes the vlogs so good. You have a great way of enriching your life and taking good care of yourself. Really enjoy your ideas and lifestyle choices.
thank you love! this means so much to me. i was afraid i would lose my audience when i was no longer a SAHGF. thank you for sticking around and im glad you enjoy the vlogs :)
I met my husband when I was 29 so there is still so much time!! We met on a day date just for a coffee 🌸
Lovely vlog to listen & watch as I stare out at my last week of renovations on a home of 7 years I will list. The unknown future is rather undaunted but I thought of a metaphor.
Gardens are like life with Spring starts so energetic and focused on flowering. Bountiful flowers, fruits, veggies grow vigorously. Fall is where we are as the gardens slowly change to rest. The mood you feel is natural especially with your sustained and intentional focus on natural living.
Introvert can be lonely in a room of 100 or 1. This is our “normal “ Kendall. Do not feel down or gramma like but embrace this chance to rejuvenate for fall & winter activities. You love skiing !! Great to see you get stronger for the slopes!!
Women change body shapes in a beautiful way much like melons or squash. Feeling bloated is different than growing in a stage of being female that protects our womb area. Because you are involved in photo shoots does not mean giving up on becoming a shapely Woman. Embrace!
90% of Teachers & entertainers are introvert. Not everyone can be on “stage” 24/7 but that’s why you can give so much back to your followers. You are becoming a wonderful Teacher. I thank you.
I love Ana Luisa, I have some pieces from a year ago that I still love
they really last!
Already, I love you so so much❤❤❤❤.
thank you for watching!
You look so elegant!
Thank you so much for your sharing~~ You are so beautiful and elegant in the robe! ❤❤
KK ❤ I just wanted to let you know how much I love your videos-I can't get enough of them! Your food hauls are my favorite, and I really wish you would create a dedicated channel just for that and the meals you eat. I recently watched the Dietitian Reviews FOOD COMBINING DIET with Kenzie Burke, and I found that Kenzie's take on the science was not very accurate. Personally, I’ve found following your way of eating to be much more helpful for me. Keep up the amazing work! Love you to bits!! ❤
I definitely don’t have any friends and I’ve come to be okay with it. Everyone I know has kids and apparently they don’t have a place in their life for anyone who doesn’t have kids so cool fine by me 👋🏻. You are your own best company ❤️
. you and I went through the break up the same exact month and I thank you for helping me get through this! Thank you for being a friend of mine Kendall, I'm serious your videos have taught me better eating habits, exercise, best advice for clothing and looks, you truly are my role model. I'm serious a few months back I gave up hope that I could ever lose weight and I followed all of your recipes and I lost 25 lb so far I'm moving to California I hope I run into you just to say thank you and hand you a crispy $100 bill for all you've done for me.
Do you feel that the positive affirmations work/help? Not going to lie, I teared up for a second when I was listening to you do them and now I am wondering if that is something I am missing
“That’s what happens when you’re social!!!..” cracked me the heck UP!!! LOL I sooo relate to that & the occasional specialty party pants 🥰
It saddens me seeing you down like that 🥺 I hope you know you are worthy of love and you are so precious and helpful to others with your content, it always helps me to re center on my self, enjoy slow living and value my self so much more than I usually do
After watching your videos I'm always left inspired
Wish you know that and that your never forget about it ❤️
I am an introvert too I don't really like talking to people either.I have really bad social anxiety& panic attacks. I have so much going in my life .. A lot of drama in my life.
I adore the atmosphere of this vlog so much
your videos are my home, thank you for the videos
I love your brown workout set, you look so cute
too many jump into relationships, marriage and kids like a check off list without really checking if it’s what they really want and what makes them happy
You are doing way more than fine , enjoy every single thing without any guilt or fear 💛❤
Kendel, from another kendall ::) I am with you! girl i am introverted 27 and live with my parents! you are doing all the things. I appreciate your realness here. If you ever come to scottsdale hit me up! I believe in you and the work you are doing 💖
Can you Link the meal plan, I can‘t find the creator you were talking about.. what is her name?
Can you Link the meal plan, I can‘t find the creator you were Talking about..
You are doing so so good in terms of wellness routine. Really inspired me to be mindful today❤
Good vid Kendel and you’re cute
Enjoy every phase of life for what it is. Once you’re a busy wife and mum this chapter will be forever closed. It’s important to embrace where you are right now because life is constantly moving forward and you can’t rewind any of it. As much as skipping to the next part seems appealing it’s good to really enjoy where you’re at too and how far you’ve come, grown & learned, life should not be rushed. Your life looks very peaceful btw. I hope you can find a genuine & likeminded friend, put positive thoughts & energy towards that 🤍 everything will fall into place as it’s meant to, trust in the universe x
thank you for the reminder! my life is very peaceful yes and i should focus on how wonderful that is because it wont always be this way.
Kk🎀 you should consider normalizing either not rushing yourself … enjoy your single time! It sounds cliche but won’t last forever ! I also think you should maybe go on a date with an older guy - maybe they’ll be a bit more mature 💗
thank you for the advice
Where is your brown workout set from?
Dear, I just want to say. You are not alone. Currently I feel empty too as a introvert with very few friends. And doing all the right things. Working out taking care of self. You can still feel lonely 😢 Hope you will feel better soon.❤It is actually sad how few comments there are on caring about you mental health😢
thank you for the love and understanding! i hope you are well
this one - i mean edit - is worthy
Yes girl the bob is bobbing your glowingx
These vlogs are my favorite 🩷
I'm exactly the same ❤
Your robe is stunning , where did you get it from ? ❤
linked the blue one!
❤ early nights
I miss your TikTok
Is it hard to transition from being a stay at home girlfriend to being single? Do you have a job now? Can you afford living without him?
yes it is a hard transition. my job is creating content. and yes i can afford to live without him
What instant coffee do you use???
nescafe instant coffee!
The fact that he couldn’t be bothered to pick you up in retrospect maybe is something. To look out for in the future,, esp if you already knew him he doesn’t have the excuse of “I wanted you to feel safe “
Get a pet❤🐶
I am really looking forward to watching this vlog. Gonna have to save it for tomorrow morning while I get ready for work so I can enjoy my morning. Always wonderful to see a new vlog from you, Kendel.
You need to be happy being alone. There will never be a lack of men for you.
thank you
I would stay away from orange juices and some green juices, they have far too much unnatural and natural sugars. I would just buy oranges and squeeze them out as needed. Also to buy a juicer and make your own fresh juice. 🫶🏼
Recently bought a juicer one of my best buys in 2024. I also fill up glass bottles and put them in the freezer👌🏾
yes i have a juicer and try to buy juices with only greens :)