That's true. At every job I have worked most of my coworkers are guys in their 30s who are divorced and are barely getting by because of child support and alimony. I talk to them I am lonely and have been single for 6 years and they are like "bro these women now days aren't worth it." They also tell me if I do really want to meet someone to leave the country. These American women are really entitled and will most likely cheat eventually even if you find one.
now talk to a hot female friend/coworker who is happily married to an ugly guy half as competent as you and you are back at being depressed thinking why does a loser like that have someone so incredible and not you
Every girlfriend I have ever had has been stressful and made me less happy than when I was single. As you get older you realise how rare good women are
I'm pushing 50 and was married over 21 years. The first year being single again was rough, but now that I've been on my own for 5 years it is like having a new lease on life. Being single is much better than being married to the wrong person.
I'm 54....wife left me 5 months ago for a twice divorced dude. It was horrible for me the first 3 months.....now I am finally sleeping better...just bought a motorcycle,hitting gym more frequently.....I think I am finding myself....it feels weird because we were together for over 20 years....3 grown kids now. I do get lonely sometimes. Good luck to you.
@@digidrum2003 Oh yeah, it is very weird to think of yourself as a singular entity rather than as part of the marriage unit. You have to redefine yourself, since we don't have the luxury of just popping back into the person we were decades previously. Good luck to you, too.
Loneliness hits hardest in the early 20s. It’s when you’re out of high school/college, and no longer surrounded by people in your same demographic. It starts to resonate that everyone is on their own path now. You get used to it as you get older and become more engaged with your individual path.
@@anorourke8682 Well I did a lot of dating in my 20's so I was rarely lonely. But it is a midlife crisis when you realize it's your last chance to find a good wife or be alone the rest of your life. Hopefully you continue to feel fine, I wish I did. But it wasn't until 39 when the peak loneliness crept in.
@@ModelJames13 Well sht… I’m dealing with a very messy breakup at the moment so that’s what’s occupying me right now. Don’t wanna be too naive or lose sense of urgency, but I see myself getting back out there pretty soon (had some success online dating despite current drama). And we have a little bit of an advantage as guys where we don’t have the biological now-or-never factor like women. Just have to make sure we’re not obnoxiously old where we’re dead before the kid turns 20. EDIT: doesn’t bother Pacino or DeNiro though 😆
I used to say this exact thing, but in retrospect, it was an excuse for hiding and not putting any effort into anything. By the time I realised that dating gets so much better when you make an effort, I had already wasted most of my fun years. Make sure you understand what you are letting go before you do.
@@darkmater4tmt's so easy to fall in that trap. Whether you date or not, i think it's vital to have a person in your life who you have a very intimate connection with - not necessarily sexually but it's even more rare to have such a close relationship with a friend i think. And maybe if you havent had a romantic relationship like that before it's hard to know what that even means.
@@jayc1676 as a person who loves their alone time in a bed, there's nothing like waking up to your partner kissing you on your forehead before they leave
I used to feel the same way until I fell in love with someone…who ended up breaking my heart. Still, I gotta say being in love with someone is definitely one of the best feelings ever (and worst when it goes to shit). Now I just long for that feeling so badly. I just find it so hard to meet women I vibe with properly, so it’s rough as shit to find someone to truly love. Still, it’s a worthwhile endeavour to pursue ultimately. But be content in being single too.
I met this old dude, 60+ years old. Overly happy, asked him what’s the secret to his happiness. He said “I’m not married”. Perfectly sums it up, should have listened to him😂😢.
I got divorced when I was 64 after 14 years of marriage. The first few years of married life were pretty good but the last few years were hellish and so was the breakup but it was all completely worth it in the end. I now live my own life on my own terms and actively avoid relationships. Freedom! Peace! I don't look for happiness, but at times IT finds me and I don't regret one step of my escape from prison.
Im 42 and single the last 4 years. Never married, no kids. When it comes to relationships ive been a late bloomer at everything. First kiss, first relationship, losing virginity, etc. Now almost all of my friends are married with very young kids I can appreciate being single, because parenting sounds really tough. Id still like to meet someone and share the rest of my life experiences with. Unsure about kids. But if it doesnt happen, I think ill be ok. Right now im just treasuring any time I get to see my folks because they are noticeably aging and I have so much to be grateful to them for.
I think you’d be happier being with someone you love. People who say otherwise are in some denial. Kids is a whole “nutha” ballgame, very rewarding but stressful. Good luck.
I feel the same way as a 32 year old single dude who notices my mom getting old and me now starting to spot grays. I need to fully figure out my life and help my mom before I fully feel ready to get back in a relationship again because those can be full time jobs on their own lol
Being single is just so peaceful, you realize this after being in relationships. What am I jumping through all these hoops for? I'm not even happy doing all this.
You realise that after being in a bad relationship. Not too long into the next one you'll be looking forward to spending time with her and it'll brighten your days.
I gave up years ago, dating is nothing but judgement and stress. Having a partner is nice and all but worrying about finding someone is just gonna make life even harder.
@@AnimeReferencenot really. Even the best relationships are draining. They hinder productivity and they serve as a constant source of distraction. I’ve been single for a few years now and I can assure you that nothing compares to the peace and tranquility of the single lifestyle. I haven’t even gone on a single date in years and I’ve never been happier. I have more money than ever, my productivity is through the roof, I taught myself a new language, I traveled to 20 new countries, and I’ve gotten so much more work done now that I have all my time for myself. The longer I’m single, the more I enjoy it. I’ve even been flirting with religion and the Church for the first time in about a decade. I seriously doubt I’ll ever get into another relationship again.
I was in a 15 year relationship with a classic narcissist. Can't honestly tell you why or how I stuck around that long. But now that it is over I am just happy I can relax again and live in peace. There are worse things than being single.
I was about a year into a relationship about 25 years ago , this was after seven years of sitting around the firehouse listening to horror stories from all the divorced and miserably married men I worked with when I got into an argument with the girl I thought I was gonna marry , shortly after the small argument started she said “ I let you do whatever you want , I let you golf with your friends ….” I stopped her there and threw her out of my house right then and there and never looked back , I’m 58 years old now, never been married, no kids , and although I sit at my dinner table by myself and crawl under my sheets alone every night,.. I have absolutely no regrets . My brother asked me once “ how the hell do you do it “ , as I was trying to figure out what to say all I could think about was how he was on his second marriage to a woman who has cheated on him twice ( that he knows of ) who has also pulled a fake restraining order on him and had him removed from his house that he owned outright before he had even met her and I said “ I guess I’m just crazy “
Her mistake was saying "I let you..." Bitch, you're not my mother. I'm a grown ass man and I'll do whatever the hell I want. I'm too old to be told what to do by people who assume any degree of authority over me.
I might be heading there to be honest and while sometimes it can be sad, I look at the alternative and I've never been happy in a relationship but I've always ended up happy when I was by myself. There's a certain sense of happiness when you're living for yourself. Kudos man
I'm 65, been divorced 32 years, and not dated in over 25 years. I don't have a cell phone and I can't tell you how peaceful my life has been. My work and hobbies keep me going. Take your health seriously and having a good attitude is half the battle. Be safe out there!
I am 64 - been single since about 35 and no kids. Lonely.??? Are you kidding.??? I have my own space and nobody to argue with. I wouldn't give this up for anything else.
I'm loving the single life now. I got divorced by my Dutch wife via fax while on a business trip to get a small business financed and take care of my family. I lost my rights to be a father and had my residency permit revoked. The Dutch govt. couldn't care less if my family was broken up. Her family all closed ranks and declared me persona non grata and treated me like a contagious disease. It took 20 years to overcome the trauma, shame, guilt, loss and after witnessing a few unstable women in short relationships, I can honestly say it's great to be single. I don't have to worry about anyone but myself. I don't have to lie about anything I'm doing or have to make any excuses as to why I'm doing it. I'm finally debt free with a few digits in my savings. I can travel at will and don't have to ask permission to anything.
@@jaybreese7416 feels safer to not get too close to anyone cause the side effects if you lose them and as a loner I find most my drama exists because other people
I'm gunna be 34 this year and I still haven't had a girlfriend or got laid. It's interesting, seems like a lot of guys hit their lowest in their late 20's. I felt lonely my whole 20's but it was my very late 20's when it hit hard. Just knowing that everyone else in the world was dating and having sex, at least that's what I was assuming, I felt so left out. And that's the worst feeling...feeling left out. Like if everyone my age was intentionally leaving me out of all the fun/ life experiences. I was depressed all the way into my early 30's. Like really depressed, I gave up on everything. I stopped trying. I wanted to die. It wasn't until just recently that I started to get out of that horribly dark place, thank God. And realized that being home alone, in bed, being sad and mad at the world is no way to go about things. I'm a man and men don't act this way. Men do, men face the world head on, men accomplish, men conquer. I don't know how I managed to turn my mindset, I guess I just had to get all that sadness, anger, and depression out of my system. Honestly, watching a ton of motivational/ red pill/ manosphere content REALLY helped because it made me realize that I had to get my shit together and improve. It was the tough love that I needed desperately, men benefit from getting hit with the truth. Some times you need to get smacked upside your head and be told to snap out of it and get it togehter. Dont get me wrong, I still struggle but thankfully it's not on the same level as it was before where I say "fuck everything" and stay in bed for days and days, even weeks. I still struggle to keep job, that's my biggest thing. I think I've made progress but every job I get it's like "ok Im gunna better this time and not miss any days" but I always manage to miss days and then get fired. The one thing I can say that I've been doing consistently without fail is going to the gym. And even tho I got fired from my last job Im not letting it get me down, Im just gunna get me another job and do better this time around. And not gunna be mad at the world anymore, Im not gunna hate myself anymore, Im not gunna be resentful towards women, Im going to take full accountability and fix what I need to fix about myself and Im going to be on top of my shit.
It's all good dude. A man needs to be on his game before looking for a life partner anyway. Providing he feels compelled to give his life to a partner..........
Having sex for the first time is like drinking for the first time at 21; afterwards you're left thinking "why did I care about this so much? It's not as great as I thought it would be." You're not missing much there, honestly. It would be a good bucket-list experience to have though. The best part of a relationship is the support that person gives you when you're not doing well (sick, injured, lost job, grieving, ect.). They also share life costs with you making everyday things easier to afford, like a roommate. I'd personally like to get married and have kids someday, but I don't think it's worth the risk. Marriage is a contract where the other party is incentivized to break it. I'd rather live life on my own terms and be free
I'm 46, was married for 9 years before going through divorce last year. It's been an emotional rollercoaster but I've reached the point where I'm really enjoying being single. I have a good co-parenting relationship with my ex, my kids are amazing & there are days i miss seeing them, but I also think I'm a better Dad getting regular breaks from them to do my own thing. Everyone is different but for me personally I think being a single Dad is the best of both worlds.
Not that comedians that write their jokes and whole sets out aren’t funny but guys like Bill Burr are naturally hilarious and he can find humor in anything on the spot. 100% real. Respect that
The predicament is after a long duration of being single, sometimes people will no longer be enthusiasticly interested to find companionship like they had before. It gets more difficult the more you age in life so that's why it is worth the experience if your younger even if it doesn't work out or doesn't last that long as one would hope.
I was single for 12 years I used this time to develop myself and started taking on the philosophical approach of stoicism now I’ve met someone and I find our interactions are healthy and devoid of drama. If something Is a problem we get it out in the open and deal with it so it doesn’t fester I think I was ready for a relationship now that I’m more mature and so is she no drama no bullsh*t. Now we’re partners and mutually support each other
Yup I too study & work on employing stoicism in my life. Tho as a guy in NYC w/ his shiznit together, no reason at all for a gf let alone marriage. Not to sleep w/ as many women as possible, just a busy guy & a lot of interests, it’s the freedom. Good for you tho!
I've been single since 2010 and now I know I'm pretty much built for it. I LOVE solitude (alone but never lonely). I have hobbies that keep me busy and my mind working, I've joined a great Meetup group and have friends for social time. My married neighbors and friends often say how jealous they are of my freedom to do whatever I want whenever I want. It's not for everybody, especially extroverts, but for some people like me, single life is absolutely wonderful. Jettison your expectations of "needing" to be in a relationship, and go with the flow.
I've been single for about 5 years (12 year relationship), and I gotta tell ya, the first 3 years were flipping brutal! Fourth year I became numb to it, but now I feel like it was a necessary thing. Shit hurts, but I'm pretty good now. If there's one thing I 110% agree with on Billy boy here is to do your 'Bucket List': very cathartic. All the best to new strugglers out there, you got this!
My only real life experience jacked me up for 2 years probably would've been longer but I think it also helped me learn all sorts of lessons like letting go, how to better respond to situations when it feels like the world is collapsing and it also pushed me to work on myself before trying the responsibility it takes to handle a relationship. I realized I wasn't ready.
I’m 36 and single. Been single for 10+ years and I love it! Never looked back and I’m building wealth and happiness! Men don’t need women. Men need to stop giving all their attention to women for free and ignore them. Stop simping!!!! I’m not lonely-I’m happy!
I've been single for 8 years, by choice. Most single women i approach aren't interested in me, and those that come to me are already in relationships. I didn't want to be "the other guy", because what i want is a loyal partner. I learned to enjoy my own company and spent my time and money pursuing other things that aren't romantic relationships. I'm 38 now and I have learned to love and accept myself without the need for a partner. I pray that other young men learn this for themselves and support other lonely friends.
going through a breakup and this is what i want for myself in the future. 35 now and haven't done much because i felt tied down. I am ready to feel free.
A lot of girls (guys too but I'm less familiar) are in bad relationships that really aren't so easy to get out of. Its more common for girls, offered relationships more than men, but it can happen to anyone. Im not talking about abuse necessarily. More of an unhealthy codependency where no one's happy but neither can go through with ending it. It's not the healthiest or nobelest solution, but often a "crush" or "fling" is what it takes to finally end it. Just saying it doesn't mean she's disloyal or "poor marriage material". I've had relationships start like that, still know both girls, and are about as far from disloyal as people get. So if you're looking for marriage one day, but dismissing girls you talk to for not being classified as "single" I guess I'm saying stop it? I dunno lol. Although if you realize you can't be ok with that and decided you're equally ok staying single? I'm dead serious when I say congratulations, and your decision deserves a medal and a TED talk.
I’m a male 23 & I’ve never had a relationship, I do get lonely sometimes but honestly all that romance stuff seems exhausting. Id rather just chill with my friends & do my hobbies. Hope everyone finds what they’re looking for out of life❤
I'm 66. Maybe you have more options than you think. I was surprised to learn how in demand American men are in many other countries. Living in the US is living in a bubble. Relationships are very different in most of world. Columbia, Brazil, Eastern Europe, Asia, SE Asia. In the US, for a guy in his 20's...nightmare. But say you get on a plane and spend 2 weeks in the Philippines. You'll likely find many women willing to talk with you and be nice. They'll give you a chance. And if a good woman sees you're serious she can fall in love very fast and hard. Scary fast. You may see a new option for yourself. A reason to put your head down, work hard, live poor to save and retire early in another country. Then look for a relationship, then have kids if you want. For nearly all Americans having kids past 40, 50, 60 is a horror. But that's the American view. Kids are super expensive and a lot of work...but that's only in the US. Even at my age I may marry and have kids because I have the resources to ensure their future and my freedom. A live-in housekeeper/nanny costs $100-200/mo USD plus food. A trained live-in caregiver for me would be $500-1000/mo. I don't plan to change any diapers. Know your options. They may inspire you for a different kind of life.
"Making a meal for somebody is one of the nicest things you can ever do" = FACT Socially, you can have a lot of things going against you, but if you invite people to eat at your table, and you put good food on it, you'll never be alone unless you want to be.
You missing the part where you make out and sleep together, best part for me is to cuddle all night with someone you love being with. You cant do that with your friends...
@@Pulsarr88grow a pair of balls. You can pay someone to do all of that. Think about if cuddling and sleeping with someone is worth risking your career, your security, your freedom, and your sanity
@@torachan23I feel it’s the age old adage of Shakespeare that is the most poignant reminder. “It is better to have truly loved and lost, then to have never known love before.”
I just turned 34 and am still single. I make six-figures, am good looking, have a good heart, am mature and like to have fun/travel and am still single. Contrary to popular belief, you can have everything going for you and still be single. I've been in two serious relationships spanning 1-2 years, my most recent one almost went to marriage but I bailed when I found some truths about her post-engagement that she kept from me. I've wondered if there was something wrong with me for being single this long, but after reading the comments I'm finding that it's more common to be single at this age than I thought.
Man, it's kinda the same for me. However I'm far from these income numbers (Central-Europe) I'm financially quite stable and the other aspects are like yours, I've never even made it to a damned first date however everyone liked me I asked out. Women are damaged in their minds and souls, with no self-respect, confidence and wisdom of what they want to do with their lives. I've had enough even though I haven't tried getting dates 100s and 100s of times, in that case I was probably insane by today.
@peterjenei1619 If every girl has rejected you, it might be time to evaluate yourself and find out why. I'm single too but I realize women are not the problem.
Considering how you seem to be making up your entire self-worth by how much money you make, and how you look, i'd probably reconsider the part about you being "mature".. Not that it's not fine to have a degree of outward confidence, but these bragging points mean literally nothing in the face of actual value.
Feminism is the problem, which is 100% of what datable females believe in. The attitude that females have is the problem, which makes females the problem. Yes, there are bad "men," but way less than what females like to carry on about.
I agree. I always felt worse in the months after a break up than I ever did not dating for months or years at a time. Loneliness seems to be one of those things that comes easier to people who date often. That’s not to say you shouldn’t date at all, but some people never remain single long enough for the wound to heal. It’s like a hangover that never quite goes away cause you can’t stop drinking.
Same...when you're single loneliness is a inconvenience. But when you have something and then you know you lost it it hits alot worse...if you try to rush into something after it'll just be fake. It's better to focus on picking yourself back up and doing what you need to do in life and being independent then before trying at another relationship. I say if it's easy for you to get girls still just do mutual hookup only no strings attached and make sure they know about it so theirs no guilt or motivation to chop off your 🌭 Make sure you're alright first because you also can't take care of someone if you can't take care of yourself
Only downside to remaining single is the people around you moving on. For me, this is happening more and more each year. Eventually you may be left with little to no friends unless they also remain single.
This is something I have pondered a few times as I enter into my thirties. I feel as my friends get married and/or begin to have kids, their families will begin to grow and their lives will become much more busy. They won't have as much time to hangout or I may lose them all together as I enter into old age. Their lives change, but mine stays fairly static.
I was a late bloomer, didn't get into my first proper relationship until I was 29. But then it was several years of bliss and loads of fun, but it fell apart dramatically after 8 years. Took quite a while to get over that but now I can feel very OK being single. I haven't found the The One yet, but I've been in decent relationships since then. Just after a while it wasn't quite it for me. Thinking more about what you actually want is good advice. I find that even in my 40s I'm still needing to learn that it's ok to be discerning and you don't need to commit to the first person who you have fun with. Yeah part of me wishes I had a stable family by this time but it is what it is. I can truly enjoy being by myself. Make sure you have one or two good friends and try to have good relationships with your family. Travel.
I'm in a very similar situation. 28 and never had a real relationship. Hell, I've never even managed to get a date. At this point it feels like it's too late for me. Like I'm so inexperienced that even if I _did_ manage to get a date, any girl who found out about my inexperience would see it as something wrong with me. How do I explain that my whole life I've been a combination of socially awkward and afraid of offending anyone, leading to me not even trying until I realized I was running out of time? So my question is: how did you do it? What did you do differently that changed things for you?
@@_Stormfatheryou need to get confident! Never show a women your weak side! I got confident through photography. I asked women on comic conventions (dont laugh😄) if i can take pics of them. Now i switched to videography. That helps A LOT. You get in a not sexual conversation. There you can train to be confident.
I think there’s a season for everything. Being on your own is fine. Being in a relationship is fine if it’s a good, healthy relationship. People should do whatever they want to do at whatever stage in life they’re at.
i’m 55 and was married and seperated by the time i was 27. I Spent 12 years as a single guy, i was not lonely, i went out regularly and met ladies and i’m not ashamed to say got laid on a sometime regular basis. Then i dated someone for 18 months and it was great, regular sex and someone to go to dinner with and parties. Been on my own now up to date and i’m happy, go out when i want, got a well paid job and i’ve actually holidayed on my own. If the times right it’ll happen, if not it’s no big deal!
I think you need to see both sides of the coin. If youre missing experience of one you will always wonder what it's like. Only when you fully understand both sides you can actually make an informed decision about how you want to live. Otherwise you're just guessing - but if youre genuinely happy with guessing then that is perfect too.
@@nightfighter7452people in that situation usually have a quality or qualities that keep them there. You cant complain about not being loved when you're unlovable.
I'm in my mid-50s. I've been single my whole life. And I can honestly say that I have never experienced a single day of loneliness. I just don't don't need to be attached to another person to feel good about myself or to enjoy life. I like people, but I do not need them. I don't need anyone's approval or validation.
I dated a lot through teens and early adulthood. I've been happily single now for over a decade. Maybe I'll find someone again, but if not, life is good like this.
Yeah I bet life is good you're able to just bang any chick you want. In my case it's fucking bullshit. The only chick I've been able to hook up with was this crazy chick who was on a bunch of medication clearly her kind wasn't right.
Just finalized my divorce in June after 8 years of marriage. I'm 41, and do not think I will settle down again. It's really not about sleeping around for me, it is all about finding peace and readjusting for the future. It's more than just finding a good woman, it is about compatibility and I will take advice from others and take time for me!
Or get on a plane to SE Asia. A place like the Philippines. It will open your eyes to what women were like in America before 1960. There are bad women there, but many are really great.Becareful though because most fall in love deeply very fast, like a couple days. Both of you. I suggest not falling in love. Just find out your options. Then you can return and have a goal to work toward. But few can not fall in love.
That’s a refreshing addition. Most military dudes (I know a couple) were the first to rush into marriage and to tye the knot again before hitting 30. Is there like peer pressure or money incentives to rush into a marriage? It’s practically a phenomenon.
@@jpined14 Money incentives. You don't have to live in the barracks. The barracks living does suck. Solution is, get married, move out and into an apartment. IN addition, you get BAQ, "Basic allotment for quarters", and Separate rations for your food. This adds up. And you have someone that you believe will give you sex. Divorce rate in the army is well over 60%, and the army can't figure out why. Most of my army buddies are on their 2nd marriage, some on their 4th. Well, we enlisted guys aren't known for our intelligence. Just a fact. I did 4 years straight in Korea, came back single and no one could believe it. I just like doing my own thing. I had to be "responsible", 12 hours a day, that was enough. I wanted the other 12 for myself.
@@dan6442 That makes sense and you seem very logical in your reasoning. Idk why so many men are eager for even more burdens outside of work. One of buddies is a military guy and rushed into a marriage with a woman he met thru an international dating site. Looks like it’s going to crap now but he admitted he’s just gonna go back to the same site and try again. Very foolish of him. 4th marriage? Yikes! These cats don’t learn a damn thing. I guess my friend’s idea shouldn’t surprise me.
Keep yourself busy and learn new things. And Bill is right about having interests and how they are important to you. I never mind seeing my boyfriends on the weekends because during the week, I can focus on myself and interests.
47 and single and don't actually mind it ive been in 3 long term relationships and a few shorter ones and now I enjoy my own time now i can cook clean and take good care of myself without someone doing my head in plus i get to watch and buy whatever i want to without the hassle of hiding whatever ive purchased for myself 😂 😂.
I'm 38 and recently realized I'm single because I just don't care about other people at all. People these days seem wayyy too self-involved and I really don't want to be a party to that behavior. If I had kids with someone I might try to make it work for them but really I'm glad I don't have kids. So I got a dog. She's my best bud; she has no ego, no social media, no onlyfans. All it took was a stupid dog for me to realize I care more about an animal than any "partner" has ever cared for me so that's why I stopped giving a shit about other people.
@@haydencoulson3389eriously. I know the comment means well but it can easily translate to: I’ve tried three goddamn times to make it work with someone but I’m 47 now and I’m just done putting in the effort. And I gave it three good tries too because there is nothing like a deep, intimate relationship with someone. I jerk off like I’m in high school again, and I watch a lot of TV and collect material objects to overcome the waves of depression I feel from being so alone.
My fiance who I loved more than anything in the whole world left me and moved in with a guy she claimed to hate and blamed it on me for not having a "dignified" enough job while I paid my bills and worked on a new career. As much as it hurts like hell I am going to take this time to be single and not even think of entering something that can hurt that much again. Maybe I'll find something good on accident, who knows. In the meantime I'm going to learn new things and thrive
she did you a big big favor, leaving you before you signed the paperwork. it stings in the short term, but it would have been a blood bath in the long term if you actually married her.
She wasn't a keeper, if someone dumps you for your job, you dodge a bullet. It's like it is divine intervention. Yes, the hurt and feelings are real. Give it time, mourn and move on, don't let the experience paralyze you for finding a person that appreciates you. Become or be, perhaps you are already, the right person for someone. Now is a good time to improve in yourself, go to the gym, unless you do already. Pick up a new skill, meditate, journal, enjoy nature, enjoy life and new company. If she comes back, I wouldn't look back at all. Just based on your comment, she had big red flags in her life. Love or infatuation can sometimes be blind. Learn to recognize red flags. I don't know, just wanted to throw something your way! Things will be better, don't lose hope or get stuck, good things are coming your way.
@@winyonzentrada I appreciate your words. I'm doing all of that and trying to become the best me and thrive. I'm not looking back no matter what she says
Don't be too hard on yourself . When I was unemployed and a heavy drinker I had more one night stands because I think women are attracted to the 'waster' not caring archetype. It's a counter intuitive process. Still focus on being the best you can be, however.
I remember a line from a movie that said, " a man is born as a single individual, yet he dies as many men". It's very true that we live as many personalities throughout our life depending who our audience is at the moment. Along that path we share time with lovers and sometimes find "the one". Then life interferes and we lose her. Now we have to return to where we were when we met. It's very difficult to move on from that moment as we have attached so much of ourselves to that person. I am facing that now at 73. Been a long road, but still here. Thought I found the one. 9 years later,single again. Understand what most would feel after the loss of those feelings of contentment. It's difficult to lose, shared emotions that only a lover can provide. And when she leaves, a hole is left in your heart and a world that seems insurmountable. Probably will be others that come along but each time it takes a toll. Guess you have to learn to always maintain that you are the priority and they are the guest in YOUR life.
40. 2 kids. Separated almost 3 years. I don't have the energy to start over again and get hurt. I still kinda want someone but just don't have it in me right now. Focusing on myself and my kids.
I'm 39, single and not dating. I am 100% focused on my craft but sometimes I would like someone to share this life with. I'm content though and feel blessed to be healthy.
I'm in a relationship of nearly 4 years. Never felt quite so lonely. I felt better being alone. Every single move I make is met with conflict and I'm not allowed to be myself without being accused of trying to attract other women, which I don't want. I don't want anyone, not even the one I have. Sad thing is, this is not an isolated thing. A few relationships have been like this and I'm just over it. I don't have a need to be with anyone. I can do everything and provide for myself just fine, I don't get lonely when I'm alone. Looking back all my life high points have been when I was single which then attracted a lady, we got together, and then the downward spiral begins. I know many that feel this way. I believe the real pandemic in the USA is codependency. It's just not worth it.
You may have to realize that the type of women you seek out for relationships are just a toxic profile. Many of us have that problem - women talk about dating hot jerks all the time and regretting it. Men are no different and we have this bad tendency to keep expecting women to be awesome while finding out they aren't. Solution is, have better standards, be patient, and run when you see red flags. Don't be desperate and end up making concessions because that leads to misery, with nobody but to blame but ourselves. Being "hot" is not a standard of women. Chasing "hot" women means you're not thinking whatsoever what it is that you REALLY want (unless you're up front and just want a fling). The fact that men repeatedly do this and then hate all women (like women hate all men) makes it all a self-fulfilling prophecy. Give women a chance, the types who maybe don't quite fit your profile. See what happens - you may be surprised.
@@unconventionalguitarist9129 agreed, this seems like something i would've said a few years ago. both of those dudes are pretty much resting on their laurels now.
@@sosaysthelegend Exactly Bill way better Dave says mostly Shock Value and I'm a black guy I love black comedians LOL Bill and the late Robin Williams Patrice O'Neal and Robin Harris always seem to be down to Earth funny
He's definitely right about going out and do what you want when your single because once you are with another person you won't have that luxury anymore or as much
I'm 31. Never married, no kids, and I've been single for 3 years. I prefer the freedom of not being in a relationship. You can live life on your own terms. I would be wirh someone if the right person came along, but I'm not looking...! Keep doing your thing, single fam.
It's different if you're a pretty girl and have a lineup of probably about 5-6 guys that are already into you. You can virtually choose when you want to pickup where you left off and jump back in. If your a guy and you're socially awkward it takes a lot more effort than "if the right person comes along...", It's months if not years going through the revolving door of dating trying to find someone decent.
@@WeiserBenYep. It is absolutely not the same as a woman. You have your pick of plenty of candidates nonstop, and women, especially pretty ones, will never know the utter aloneness most men face.
It gets easier as time goes by. I'm at 8 years solo now. I go do things I love because I'm absolutely passionate about them. I'm out living life as we all should be. A man's peace of mind is everything. Something to be grateful for once you achieve it. I'm always hearing stories of men getting played from friends, coworkers, etc. and listening to BS women talk nonsense entitled shit. Just solidifies each passing day that going on alone ain't all that bad. I'm all good. Hope you fellas find a contentment among yourselves...✌️
I got divorced 5 years ago after being married for 15. When my ex left I thought it was horrible but as time went on I learned that single living is much better than intertwining my life another person. At least for me it is.
U got like 10 years til time to look to settle down. Use this time to develop yourself, get good at something, make money, get jacked etc. Don´t waste time on playing the relationship game that young, it´ll be a waste of time as ur not yet even the man ur really gonna be. And by that time you will also know better how to recognize a good quality woman that u really want in ur life. I mean date, hook up and have fun, but don´t put significant time on it yet. Unless ofcourse u rly just stumble on the love of ur life, then go for it ofc. Falling in love is fun too.
So what i mean is that some times we might have this idea in our heads, that we have to do something a certain way, like we have to have a gf or a relationship and live this way. But thats rather a false image put in our heads by movies an so on.
@@marsvai2410 I appreciate the advice dude. I’ve put off getting into relationships since I got out of my last one a little over a year ago, the thing is watching everyone around you have relationships you feel oddly pressured to get into one. I’ve realized I’ve got a life to live and nows the time to do it.🙏🏻
I'm 37 and have been single for three years. It's just not worth the risk of being taken to court and losing half your shot and only seeing the kids every other weekend. 18 years 18 years got u for one of your kids got u for 18 years. The current court system is a tragedy.
I‘m 41 and my Wife left me for one of her Clients(she owns a dog school) after 11 years (7 of them married). Basically I lost everything and it hit me real hard. This happend in September 22. I‘m still kinda messed up, takes time I guess. I‘m tryin to find my mental point of origin to find peace of mind again.
Being single and being in a relationship isn't any different. At the end you still suffer equally, just in different ways. So pick your poison. And always be aware, that the human mind longs for things it doesn't have. If you are single, you long for a partner. If you have a partner, you long for freedom. Both of these longings are instinctive and illusionary. Both will haunt you forever.
I feel lonely all the time. ALL the time. It’s great! The best thing about it is that I expect nothing from anyone and, even better, no one expects anything from me! It’s the best. It’s selfish, but it’s the best.
@@ItsAllAboutGuitar This reminds me of that Louis CK bit about sitting and how if someone says he needs to get up for any reason, he needs to be given all the information before he gets up.
@@seerstone8982 I’m not sure, but I’m about 70% certain that only guys shave people off their lives to avoid having to deal with them because men won’t leave women alone. Women, even if they are as sick of people as I am, even if they want to be left alone, they can’t. Women don’t pursue men anywhere near as much as men pursue women. I wonder if that tends to make things easier or harder on women?
Been single for a good while. It was difficult getting past the separation at first but in time it came. I honestly don’t remember when it happened but ever since I’ve been able to truly enjoy my time with myself. I still enjoy the company of people like family but real friends are hard to come by and possible girlfriends are even harder. I’ve never actively searched because I don’t require it but I’m very much open to coming across the right person and taking a chance. Thing is the “right” person is REALLY hard to come by. I’m sure one day the opportunity will present itself but until then I’m gonna enjoy the freedom I have and I hope the “right” person is doing the same because that’s when you truly get to understand yourself and what you want in life. Too many people rush into companionship because they’re too afraid not to be a part of something. Point is, find yourself before you try finding someone else!
I’m 41, single, never married, no kids. I used to get really lonely. I felt like marriage was this ultimate goal that would be truly fulfilling and without it I was broken or lacking somehow. These days I’m terrified to get married, looking at divorce rates etc. I don’t want to lose my house and have to start over again. I have a good life. I work part time, hike, snowboard tons, have plenty of hobbies etc. What I find difficult is that most people my age ARE married with kids. So it can be difficult to spend time with friends because they have family commitments. It’s been fun being adopted as ‘uncle’ to so many of my friends kids but it’s not the same. It’s also recently started to bother me that my blood line will end with my death. That’s something that was never important to be until now. The best things in life are your relationships with friends and family. Period. Not motorbikes or careers or money etc (don’t get me wrong, I love motorbikes!) It’s your relationships. I think our culture sets us up for failure when it comes to marriage. I also don’t see a lot of women that I would consider making that kind of commitment to. I still have hope though. But it’s a good thing to create your own life, your own meaning, achieve your own goals. The grass is always greener. I’ve felt just as alone in a crowd as on my own. And married people still experience loneliness at times. Anyway. I don’t really have a point but just wanted to share. Some really good comments here.
Get out of your community, possibly your country. If your culture is letting you down find a new culture. The world is bigger than your neighborhood man
36 years, never had a girlfriend, the loneliness pains me every day. If I allowed myself unhelpful introspection, that feeling would physically clench my heart and sink it like you're in a car in that peak jump moment before the drop. I mastered the skill of ignoring that feeling the best I can and simply enjoy the rest of life. This is not an advice, it would be a shitty advice if it would. It's just a description. Freedom is fine, it has great benefits, but I'm simply not built that way, it's who I am and not what I value the most.
I'm sorry man, I know how that feels. I had only one gf in highschool for a few weeks then nothing all during my 20s. Got into a relationship at 29 that lasted 8 years. Was devastated when that ended. But since then I've learned that a relationship doesn't make you happy and you can be very happy by yourself too. But I can understand that perspective is hard to get when you've never had the experience first. So I hope you do find that relationship, but maybe also to experience the breakup and finding yourself again after that ;) But really, loneliness is something you create in your head. Plenty of married guys (and women) are fucking lonely. Hopefully you have some friends or family. Even a pet or a good neighbour. You can be "alone" but not lonely.
Just remember that being in a relationship with the wrong person can be hell. My last relationship lasted 4 months. It got to a point where she was complaining about everything and she made me feel very unappreciated. So I broke it off with her. Now I have all this freedom, and just as important, peace and quiet.
I’m 50 live in the NYC area and got married at 37 and still happily married with 2 kids. I met a lot of women being single and had a bunch of relationships. I always tell my single young friends that are dating when you think you are missing out on something (a good time, a more attractive person or wanting to do something else) and find the person you are with is a drag it’s over. Move on. Don’t try and make it work bc it never will. Many think marriage is something you have to do. It’s not!!!
I LOVED being single after i left my woman of 16 years. She treated me like shit and i dipped tf out. Now I'm with the most incredible woman who gives me everything I needed that my ex wasn't giving. It's great. Someone will come along but you need to put yourself out there.
I’ve been on and off in relationships for many years. I’m in a relationship again now, and I’m fairly happy. I just say there’s pros and cons to both. I love being single, I do everything I want to do, live however I want to live, it’s awesome. And hooking up with some random chicks from time to time is great. The biggest issue I would have was when the weekend would come, sometimes I wish there was someone there to spend the day with, and the night with, and there could be times of loneliness. I would never have these feelings during the week, between work, gym, and everything else I needed to do, I didn’t need anyone else around. But being in a relationship has all kinds of challenges you need to deal with.
I'm 23 and feel the pain. I'm still really young, haven't watched porn in 3 or 4 months I can't remember. Going to work everyday, karate 3 times a week. It sucks because I still haven't had a girlfriend. No kiss, still a virgin, haven't done anything with a girl, and just imagining it frightens me. Not as if I'm scared, but more extremely nervous. Chicks aren't scary I know (well some of them are), but since I was a kid, having crushes on girls and so on, seeing friends of mine in highschool getting girlfriends, losing their virginities and so on. You feel left out. It makes you depressed, because you want that. You wish you could be lying in bed next to a beautiful women, waking up in the morning and turning over and seeing her there. Going out places, holding hands, having a laugh together, singing to rock n roll and 80s pop music in the car; eventually settling down and having kids, getting married, or the other way round. It's just really hard and nerve racking the thought of going on a date, meeting a complete stranger, worrying what you say, how to impress her. And then how does it evolve into a relationship? When do you start kissing her, eventually having sex. How do you get there? It worry's me almost everyday. At work I'm a vehicle detailer, and I clean motorhomes, vans, cars etc. I see customers come in who are these beautiful women from overseas; a lot from sweden or wherever. A lot of blonde women. Either my age or older, or possibly a tiny bit younger. How do I struck up a conversation with a girl, how do you ask for her number without sounding like a nervous wreck, potentially turning her off you because of you being really nervous. A lot of people my age and even younger mostly have already experienced relationships and so on; and it feels like you're on your own. I understand there are most definitely girls out there in the same position as me. But when you're by yourself, alone with your thoughts, and surrounded by people, especially your mates who can just chat to chicks so easily. Those girls like them. There have been girls that have liked me in the past of course. As kids. And possibly girls who liked me when I was a teen, but didn't tell me about it, or no one else told me they liked me. And now with all the crap nowadays with people in my generation acting all weird and so on. Sleeping around. It's hard to find a genuine girl. Wish it was the 50's or something, when love meant something. Relationships meant something. Marriage meant something. People used to actually, properly fall in love back then. You meet a beautiful girl, and that's it. You grow old together. I hope I meet a girl someday. As I am currently going through mental health issues right now. OCD issues and so on. Still recovering from a decade and long porn addiction. I'm sure there is a girl out there. And I'll be looking back on this as a memory. I'd be with a girl, married, kids, looking back on my earlier years, thankful that I found someone. I hope others my age are in the same boat. From Melbourne, Australia :)
I'm 22 and im just same as you brother.I'm lost while people are having fun,socializing,sharing their life with their friends and bonding, getting into relationships and kissing,hugging,having sex etc.I do not know what to do I think I just lost interest in life and just suffering in this cold ditch of loneliness.
Reading this made me so sad because I completely relate. Just knowing that you’re far from the only one feeling this way makes me feel a little bit better
I am in the exact same situation as you are, I am 24. But for me not a single girl ever liked or even looked at me, not even 1 second in my life, and I feel like no girl ever liked me secretly, maybe I am wrong.
I have no idea, but your comment resonated with me. I'm 35 and still single, but if I'm honest I havn't really had my life together until recently. Joined the Navy at 18 basically because I would have been kicked out of the house (or that was the impression I got, at least) and have only had sex once in my life with a "lady of the night" (which I would not recommend, by the way). Got out of the Navy at 22 because it just wasn't my thing. From there I still kind of coasted off of the Navy (G.I. Bill allowed me to live for free as long as I was going to school) and basically did that off and on (switched degrees and jobs a bunch) until I finally finished a couple years ago and got my Associates in Health Science (which I'm not even using btw lol). I did odd jobs until a little over a year ago when I finally got a full-time with Citi Bank, which allowed me to get my own place. I have to say, after living at the mercy of the Navy and other people (family and an unrealiable roommate) it feels great to finally have my own place. Who knows, maybe some day I will have a woman, maybe not. Take it one step at a time.
there are many more out there than you can imagine. quick tips and advices: join different courses, such as dance courses, or other martial arts too, learn a musical instrument, cooking classes, etc. You will inevitably meet someone, and if you don't meet her there, you will meet some great people along the way that eventually know someone to introduce to you. I know this sounds like tabboo and i got stuck in that, but just try to enjoy the things in life, family, spend time with friends, visit places whatever you like and focus on worrying less on finding "the girl" because they usually appear when you least expect it! the more you expect it, the less likely you are to find her! weird but that's just life. Also, spending at least 1 hour of gym every day, it does help with mental anxiety/depression if you are having that, it really does after at least a few weeks of consistency you feel it. The best of luck! (and to anyone reading this!)
There is one problem with most modern men. They’ve been programmed to be dependent on women’s validation since their birth. - at home a boy’s behavior is evaluated by his mother and grandmother. - in kindergarten and later school it is evaluated by a female teacher. - later in the university and jobs there surely will be the female higher ups who’ll evaluate men’s behavior. Modern men due to lack of male role models were programmed to seek female validation and think they are worthless without it. I doubt that in the ancient times any Samurai, Viking or Spartan warriors really cared about female validation. The cult of the female validation in the modern world is artificial and men must overcome it.
I'm 30, never been in a relationship. I wasn't motivated to date in college, and then became motivated in my 20s when dating became much more difficult. My motivation these days comes and goes. I just tell myself that wherever my life goes, it will be a good life. Good family, good friends, good hobbies, good mood. Still somewhat trying to figure out my long-term career
The first time I felt lonely was also the first time I lost a girlfriend I actually cared about. It wasn't a habit. It was feeling appreciated and having something to look forward to, something you are building together. I travel and do things, but when they are over, I have to find something else to work toward. When you tell women what the deal is, most of them will walk away. Find someone who will take the deal or go it alone.
Crazy, my first seriously relationship was late 20s. Was total cool with being single up until I broke up with her. Been chasing that relationship feeling ever since
You can have women being single… the thing is, you don’t need all the drama and high costs of being in a relationship to get some love in your life. Let the woman choose you and fill your needs. If not just let them go.
Single for over 20 yrs no problems here I do what I want and totally happy every time I meet a girl, the craziness happens, we split and I'm back happy again !!
Checking off items on your bucket list before you’re in any serious relationship is fantastic advice. I also think by challenging yourself and overcoming obstacles, you’ll be a far better person AND partner if/when you do end up in a serious relationship.
62 and never been in a relationship or dated, I never get lonely or bored, Loner life is something I just accepted and will probably die this way, it's ok
@@Apachemiwokmexican777 No. Marriage is a ceremonial choice you do for whatever weird spiritual reasons. Being in a relationship is the alternative to being single.
I'm six years in and I've never been happier being single. I've kept my focus on self improvement. It makes a big difference. I enjoy my time alone. I guess I'm that weird guy. I swear I don't kill people.
As a creative person of 43 years I have never felt lonely until being around others. I have realised I wierd people out mostly with my depth of thought and constant ideagasms but perhaps the depth of inner space is the key to contentedness. People I help in my community profession who are deeply traumatised by loss of a partner (divorce to old age) also seem rather skin deep in the above described dimension. At this point in my life I feel I would experience the inverse of the usual reason for a broken heart if I were to "find" someone. A potentially never before realised freedom rising in the place of a tried and true one, just turned around from the usual experiences of people.
A lot of solid advice on his part, for sure. But me? In my early 50's and single for the last 8 years or so, I've come to realize I wasn't meant to be married or anything like. Had to learn that the hard way, sadly. But better to learn that and know it than to go about my life totally oblivious to it the way many if not most guys appear to be.
An important thing is to realise that being in a romantic relationship isn't the only way to connect with people. Also it's better to be lonely than unhappy in the wrong relationship I know a lot of people who are stuck in bad relationships because they are afraid to be alone it's BS. People assume that those who are happy being in their own company are weird loners it's just not true. I have plenty of positive interactions with people and I have some good friends but I'm much happier when I'm on my own.
Single and in my 50's. Friends no longer ask if I want someone in my life they they have (most of them see I am happier than them). I am not opposed to a relationship but I need to be careful. I am happy/content about 90-95% of the time and lonely about 5%. Too many men are willing to fill that 5% and throw away the 90-95% while I am not. Anyone that comes into my life needs to enhance what I already have and I would hope they would be looking to do the same for them.
Wow! I feel exactly the same! However, I couldn't have said it as well as you did. I'm 54 and, like you, friends have stopped trying to find someone for me. I'm sure their wives still are doubtful that I'm truly happy and "must" want to find someone to share my life, as my way of thinking is more rare. Meanwhile, although there are obviously pros and cons of a relationship, I am truly happy alone. Maybe it's that I've become set in my ways and more selfish, but, in my mind, a relationship sounds like it would be require sacrifices I'm not willing to endure.
@@michaelstanton5455 This reminded me of a conversation a friend in my situation had with an uncle of his. His uncle asked why he didn't want someone to share his life with and to have around the house. My friend asked his uncle if he was happy and the Uncle paused for a few moments and then said "well...happiness isn't everything.". My friend just smiled and changed the conversation. The uncle never asked him again.
I was in 3 long term relationships from the time I was 18 until I was 31. Losing the last girl devastated me like nothing ever has done before and I spent the next decade trying to find someone like her that I could hopefully marry. That 10 years was full of absolutely horrific women and misery. I’m now 45 and I never want to be in another relationship again. I frickin love being single, I have so many hobbies and I even started my own business, things I could have probably never done if I were married. It was the best thing that ever happened to me and I’ve never been happier. If men could just get the idea that they have to be with a woman to be happy out of their heads, so many dudes could achieve happiness and greatness. Nothing can stop you when you’re thinking clearly.
Being a bachelor my whole life there is so much societal hate from borrowing money all the way to bitter guy friends and their girlfriends/wives that know you are a threat.
I am 67yrs old never married dont have any family. I am never lonely. Loneliness is a taught emotion. If nobody teaches you about being lonely you wont be. I know that sounds crazy because everyone thinks loneliness is real. Its not. If you feel alone go out meet people. Done no more loneliness. For me it helps that I dont really like humans. Anyway my 2 cents.
I'm 36 too and although I'm with someone right now I'm gonna dump her today.. Don't need that drama and the bs in my life.. I was single for 7-8 years prior and I miss it. Going back to it
If you’re a single guy and are lonely, just talk to married men and you’ll feel way better after. 😂
HEH
That's true. At every job I have worked most of my coworkers are guys in their 30s who are divorced and are barely getting by because of child support and alimony. I talk to them I am lonely and have been single for 6 years and they are like "bro these women now days aren't worth it." They also tell me if I do really want to meet someone to leave the country. These American women are really entitled and will most likely cheat eventually even if you find one.
now talk to a hot female friend/coworker who is happily married to an ugly guy half as competent as you and you are back at being depressed thinking why does a loser like that have someone so incredible and not you
Or you can watch and read crap posted by the self-entitled thots on social media.
Lol that's so true 😅
Every girlfriend I have ever had has been stressful and made me less happy than when I was single. As you get older you realise how rare good women are
Very true words sir!
And they gaslight like crazy...these broads!
@@brandonclark2585 yes but from inside their delusion bubble it's unconscious...
Right on soo true brother i feel the same way.👍
@@zenden6564 yep. 'It's not me, it's you'
Hit the wall & go tell it on the mountain then.
I'm pushing 50 and was married over 21 years. The first year being single again was rough, but now that I've been on my own for 5 years it is like having a new lease on life. Being single is much better than being married to the wrong person.
I'm 54....wife left me 5 months ago for a twice divorced dude. It was horrible for me the first 3 months.....now I am finally sleeping better...just bought a motorcycle,hitting gym more frequently.....I think I am finding myself....it feels weird because we were together for over 20 years....3 grown kids now. I do get lonely sometimes. Good luck to you.
@@digidrum2003 Oh yeah, it is very weird to think of yourself as a singular entity rather than as part of the marriage unit. You have to redefine yourself, since we don't have the luxury of just popping back into the person we were decades previously.
Good luck to you, too.
ive been single 13 years n i wake myself up by fucking my own couch. Do u know how depressed that makes me feel? being lonely is no joke
Hell yeah…. Just turned 50…. Single since 2019. Happiest I’ve ever been.
@@scottyk5376ditto 😊
Loneliness hits hardest in the early 20s. It’s when you’re out of high school/college, and no longer surrounded by people in your same demographic. It starts to resonate that everyone is on their own path now. You get used to it as you get older and become more engaged with your individual path.
Gets a lot worse when you're 40.
@@ModelJames13 Well I’m gonna be 38 😅 so far loneliness hasn’t hit me like it did in early 20s. I thought 40s struggle was more midlife crisis.
I needed to hear this... Exactly what I'm in right now.. 22
@@anorourke8682 Well I did a lot of dating in my 20's so I was rarely lonely. But it is a midlife crisis when you realize it's your last chance to find a good wife or be alone the rest of your life. Hopefully you continue to feel fine, I wish I did. But it wasn't until 39 when the peak loneliness crept in.
@@ModelJames13 Well sht… I’m dealing with a very messy breakup at the moment so that’s what’s occupying me right now. Don’t wanna be too naive or lose sense of urgency, but I see myself getting back out there pretty soon (had some success online dating despite current drama). And we have a little bit of an advantage as guys where we don’t have the biological now-or-never factor like women. Just have to make sure we’re not obnoxiously old where we’re dead before the kid turns 20. EDIT: doesn’t bother Pacino or DeNiro though 😆
If you're truly happy being by yourself, dating is no big deal. If it happens it's great; if not, it's ok
I used to say this exact thing, but in retrospect, it was an excuse for hiding and not putting any effort into anything. By the time I realised that dating gets so much better when you make an effort, I had already wasted most of my fun years. Make sure you understand what you are letting go before you do.
@@darkmater4tmt's so easy to fall in that trap. Whether you date or not, i think it's vital to have a person in your life who you have a very intimate connection with - not necessarily sexually but it's even more rare to have such a close relationship with a friend i think. And maybe if you havent had a romantic relationship like that before it's hard to know what that even means.
Only psychos are happy by themselves forever
Great comment👌
@darkmater4tm - would you mind sharing how you had that ah-ha moment and knew your actions/mindset was just an excuse for hiding?
I enjoy being single more than a relationship. You just have so much freedom.
Yea…that bed gets lonely though. You might be fine with that but it bothers me
@@JohnnyDollar720 I'm gonna call bullshit on that .... I think having a bed to yourself is the most desired thing in a long term relationship.
@@jayc1676 as a person who loves their alone time in a bed, there's nothing like waking up to your partner kissing you on your forehead before they leave
I used to feel the same way until I fell in love with someone…who ended up breaking my heart. Still, I gotta say being in love with someone is definitely one of the best feelings ever (and worst when it goes to shit). Now I just long for that feeling so badly. I just find it so hard to meet women I vibe with properly, so it’s rough as shit to find someone to truly love. Still, it’s a worthwhile endeavour to pursue ultimately. But be content in being single too.
Same, 57 years and counting - I doubt I will ever be in a real LTR. Marriage never. Cohabitation maybe.
Being single sucks sometimes but not as much as being stuck with child support.
That's literally the only reasoning that keeps me going
@@will420high4 My brother is going through that.
I'm single, lonely, and stuck on child support. So, yeah...Lol
They need to change the wording. We all now know it's not really "child support".
@@jujackmarketing - well it is “child” support because women are essentially children w/ breasts
I met this old dude, 60+ years old. Overly happy, asked him what’s the secret to his happiness. He said “I’m not married”. Perfectly sums it up, should have listened to him😂😢.
I got divorced when I was 64 after 14 years of marriage. The first few years of married life were pretty good but the last few years were hellish and so was the breakup but it was all completely worth it in the end. I now live my own life on my own terms and actively avoid relationships. Freedom! Peace! I don't look for happiness, but at times IT finds me and I don't regret one step of my escape from prison.
I thinks that "old dude" was me. True dat anyways.
Im 42 and single the last 4 years. Never married, no kids. When it comes to relationships ive been a late bloomer at everything. First kiss, first relationship, losing virginity, etc.
Now almost all of my friends are married with very young kids I can appreciate being single, because parenting sounds really tough. Id still like to meet someone and share the rest of my life experiences with. Unsure about kids. But if it doesnt happen, I think ill be ok. Right now im just treasuring any time I get to see my folks because they are noticeably aging and I have so much to be grateful to them for.
I think you’d be happier being with someone you love. People who say otherwise are in some denial. Kids is a whole “nutha” ballgame, very rewarding but stressful. Good luck.
Stay single ad enjoy your kife my friend :)
I feel the same way as a 32 year old single dude who notices my mom getting old and me now starting to spot grays. I need to fully figure out my life and help my mom before I fully feel ready to get back in a relationship again because those can be full time jobs on their own lol
@@sanitary103he don’t need luck he got this it seems
Same here, I'm 48 never married no kids. I can do whatever I want and not have someone nagging me. I love the freedom I have being solo.
Being single is just so peaceful, you realize this after being in relationships. What am I jumping through all these hoops for? I'm not even happy doing all this.
You realise that after being in a bad relationship. Not too long into the next one you'll be looking forward to spending time with her and it'll brighten your days.
After a certain amount of time goes by and she can no longer keep up the facade.
I gave up years ago, dating is nothing but judgement and stress. Having a partner is nice and all but worrying about finding someone is just gonna make life even harder.
Knowing that you're a loser and you failed at life isn't peaceful.
@@AnimeReferencenot really. Even the best relationships are draining. They hinder productivity and they serve as a constant source of distraction. I’ve been single for a few years now and I can assure you that nothing compares to the peace and tranquility of the single lifestyle. I haven’t even gone on a single date in years and I’ve never been happier. I have more money than ever, my productivity is through the roof, I taught myself a new language, I traveled to 20 new countries, and I’ve gotten so much more work done now that I have all my time for myself. The longer I’m single, the more I enjoy it. I’ve even been flirting with religion and the Church for the first time in about a decade. I seriously doubt I’ll ever get into another relationship again.
I was in a 15 year relationship with a classic narcissist. Can't honestly tell you why or how I stuck around that long. But now that it is over I am just happy I can relax again and live in peace. There are worse things than being single.
I am a introvert. I am happy on my own to be honest.
Sorry to hear that dude
Because you were afraid of being alone. I stuck around for 7 years with a fucking nightmare myself
@@DeathrashWhiplash Not sure about that but narcissists are expert manipulators. They mess up people's minds so that they stay with them.
Good for you! Narcissists are the worst
I was about a year into a relationship about 25 years ago , this was after seven years of sitting around the firehouse listening to horror stories from all the divorced and miserably married men I worked with when I got into an argument with the girl I thought I was gonna marry , shortly after the small argument started she said “ I let you do whatever you want , I let you golf with your friends ….” I stopped her there and threw her out of my house right then and there and never looked back , I’m 58 years old now, never been married, no kids , and although I sit at my dinner table by myself and crawl under my sheets alone every night,.. I have absolutely no regrets . My brother asked me once “ how the hell do you do it “ , as I was trying to figure out what to say all I could think about was how he was on his second marriage to a woman who has cheated on him twice ( that he knows of ) who has also pulled a fake restraining order on him and had him removed from his house that he owned outright before he had even met her and I said “ I guess I’m just crazy “
Wholly crap! Same situation here, I’m 56, retired army medic, almost got married, now I’m set in my ways and happy…who needs marriage
Her mistake was saying "I let you..." Bitch, you're not my mother. I'm a grown ass man and I'll do whatever the hell I want. I'm too old to be told what to do by people who assume any degree of authority over me.
This sounds like extreme mental illness. Not the being single part, just how you carry yourself.
I might be heading there to be honest and while sometimes it can be sad, I look at the alternative and I've never been happy in a relationship but I've always ended up happy when I was by myself. There's a certain sense of happiness when you're living for yourself. Kudos man
Huge mistake
I'm 65, been divorced 32 years, and not dated in over 25 years. I don't have a cell phone and I can't tell you how peaceful my life has been. My work and hobbies keep me going. Take your health seriously and having a good attitude is half the battle. Be safe out there!
maybe get a cell phone for emergencies??
Good advice!
Spankbang and It’s fine
No kids either? What have you defined your purpose as?
I have 3 grown children and grandchildren. I still have a landline to communicate!
I am 64 - been single since about 35 and no kids. Lonely.??? Are you kidding.???
I have my own space and nobody to argue with. I wouldn't give this up for anything else.
Over 50, currently single, and have discovered it’s better to be single and lonely than married and miserable.
my thoughts exactly
I'm loving the single life now. I got divorced by my Dutch wife via fax while on a business trip to get a small business financed and take care of my family. I lost my rights to be a father and had my residency permit revoked. The Dutch govt. couldn't care less if my family was broken up. Her family all closed ranks and declared me persona non grata and treated me like a contagious disease. It took 20 years to overcome the trauma, shame, guilt, loss and after witnessing a few unstable women in short relationships, I can honestly say it's great to be single. I don't have to worry about anyone but myself. I don't have to lie about anything I'm doing or have to make any excuses as to why I'm doing it. I'm finally debt free with a few digits in my savings. I can travel at will and don't have to ask permission to anything.
Damn 20 years. But you are finally free now.
@@haunterdragon4580 that's what trauma does to you. It takes that long to recover.
@@jaybreese7416 feels safer to not get too close to anyone cause the side effects if you lose them and as a loner I find most my drama exists because other people
I'm gunna be 34 this year and I still haven't had a girlfriend or got laid. It's interesting, seems like a lot of guys hit their lowest in their late 20's. I felt lonely my whole 20's but it was my very late 20's when it hit hard. Just knowing that everyone else in the world was dating and having sex, at least that's what I was assuming, I felt so left out. And that's the worst feeling...feeling left out. Like if everyone my age was intentionally leaving me out of all the fun/ life experiences. I was depressed all the way into my early 30's. Like really depressed, I gave up on everything. I stopped trying. I wanted to die. It wasn't until just recently that I started to get out of that horribly dark place, thank God. And realized that being home alone, in bed, being sad and mad at the world is no way to go about things. I'm a man and men don't act this way. Men do, men face the world head on, men accomplish, men conquer. I don't know how I managed to turn my mindset, I guess I just had to get all that sadness, anger, and depression out of my system. Honestly, watching a ton of motivational/ red pill/ manosphere content REALLY helped because it made me realize that I had to get my shit together and improve. It was the tough love that I needed desperately, men benefit from getting hit with the truth. Some times you need to get smacked upside your head and be told to snap out of it and get it togehter. Dont get me wrong, I still struggle but thankfully it's not on the same level as it was before where I say "fuck everything" and stay in bed for days and days, even weeks. I still struggle to keep job, that's my biggest thing. I think I've made progress but every job I get it's like "ok Im gunna better this time and not miss any days" but I always manage to miss days and then get fired. The one thing I can say that I've been doing consistently without fail is going to the gym. And even tho I got fired from my last job Im not letting it get me down, Im just gunna get me another job and do better this time around. And not gunna be mad at the world anymore, Im not gunna hate myself anymore, Im not gunna be resentful towards women, Im going to take full accountability and fix what I need to fix about myself and Im going to be on top of my shit.
It's all good dude. A man needs to be on his game before looking for a life partner anyway. Providing he feels compelled to give his life to a partner..........
take a vacation to thailand.
Having sex for the first time is like drinking for the first time at 21; afterwards you're left thinking "why did I care about this so much? It's not as great as I thought it would be." You're not missing much there, honestly. It would be a good bucket-list experience to have though.
The best part of a relationship is the support that person gives you when you're not doing well (sick, injured, lost job, grieving, ect.). They also share life costs with you making everyday things easier to afford, like a roommate.
I'd personally like to get married and have kids someday, but I don't think it's worth the risk. Marriage is a contract where the other party is incentivized to break it. I'd rather live life on my own terms and be free
That was a good read, cheers and good luck
@@SaltBushCity thank you very much, brother.
I'm 46, was married for 9 years before going through divorce last year. It's been an emotional rollercoaster but I've reached the point where I'm really enjoying being single. I have a good co-parenting relationship with my ex, my kids are amazing & there are days i miss seeing them, but I also think I'm a better Dad getting regular breaks from them to do my own thing. Everyone is different but for me personally I think being a single Dad is the best of both worlds.
I think according to statistics it's not great for kids to come from a broken family.
Not that comedians that write their jokes and whole sets out aren’t funny but guys like Bill Burr are naturally hilarious and he can find humor in anything on the spot. 100% real. Respect that
The misery of being single can’t hold a candle to the hopelessness of a toxic relationship. You can’t put a price on freedom.
you can always leave a relationship though, unless you have kids it's not that difficult. Just leave.
The predicament is after a long duration of being single, sometimes people will no longer be enthusiasticly interested to find companionship like they had before. It gets more difficult the more you age in life so that's why it is worth the experience if your younger even if it doesn't work out or doesn't last that long as one would hope.
I was single for 12 years I used this time to develop myself and started taking on the philosophical approach of stoicism now I’ve met someone and I find our interactions are healthy and devoid of drama. If something Is a problem we get it out in the open and deal with it so it doesn’t fester I think I was ready for a relationship now that I’m more mature and so is she no drama no bullsh*t. Now we’re partners and mutually support each other
How old are you, if you don't mind?
You sound wise and practical.
Yup I too study & work on employing stoicism in my life. Tho as a guy in NYC w/ his shiznit together, no reason at all for a gf let alone marriage. Not to sleep w/ as many women as possible, just a busy guy & a lot of interests, it’s the freedom. Good for you tho!
@@marcust478 53, thanks
@@peterj.fallon4327 thank you!
I've been single since 2010 and now I know I'm pretty much built for it. I LOVE solitude (alone but never lonely). I have hobbies that keep me busy and my mind working, I've joined a great Meetup group and have friends for social time. My married neighbors and friends often say how jealous they are of my freedom to do whatever I want whenever I want. It's not for everybody, especially extroverts, but for some people like me, single life is absolutely wonderful. Jettison your expectations of "needing" to be in a relationship, and go with the flow.
I've been single for about 5 years (12 year relationship), and I gotta tell ya, the first 3 years were flipping brutal! Fourth year I became numb to it, but now I feel like it was a necessary thing. Shit hurts, but I'm pretty good now. If there's one thing I 110% agree with on Billy boy here is to do your 'Bucket List': very cathartic. All the best to new strugglers out there, you got this!
My only real life experience jacked me up for 2 years probably would've been longer but I think it also helped me learn all sorts of lessons like letting go, how to better respond to situations when it feels like the world is collapsing and it also pushed me to work on myself before trying the responsibility it takes to handle a relationship. I realized I wasn't ready.
I’m 36 and single. Been single for 10+ years and I love it! Never looked back and I’m building wealth and happiness!
Men don’t need women. Men need to stop giving all their attention to women for free and ignore them. Stop simping!!!!
I’m not lonely-I’m happy!
Haha great comment
Are you having sex during those years? Asking because I am scared of remaining celibate for 9 more years.
@@AlexZeBeastpay for it.. eithr way you’re paying with your time or money.
I've been single for 8 years, by choice. Most single women i approach aren't interested in me, and those that come to me are already in relationships. I didn't want to be "the other guy", because what i want is a loyal partner.
I learned to enjoy my own company and spent my time and money pursuing other things that aren't romantic relationships.
I'm 38 now and I have learned to love and accept myself without the need for a partner. I pray that other young men learn this for themselves and support other lonely friends.
going through a breakup and this is what i want for myself in the future. 35 now and haven't done much because i felt tied down. I am ready to feel free.
32 and on my way there..
35 and enjoying my life :)
That breaks my heart. Im 27 and terrified of never figuring romance out.
A lot of girls (guys too but I'm less familiar) are in bad relationships that really aren't so easy to get out of. Its more common for girls, offered relationships more than men, but it can happen to anyone. Im not talking about abuse necessarily. More of an unhealthy codependency where no one's happy but neither can go through with ending it. It's not the healthiest or nobelest solution, but often a "crush" or "fling" is what it takes to finally end it.
Just saying it doesn't mean she's disloyal or "poor marriage material". I've had relationships start like that, still know both girls, and are about as far from disloyal as people get. So if you're looking for marriage one day, but dismissing girls you talk to for not being classified as "single" I guess I'm saying stop it? I dunno lol.
Although if you realize you can't be ok with that and decided you're equally ok staying single? I'm dead serious when I say congratulations, and your decision deserves a medal and a TED talk.
I’m a male 23 & I’ve never had a relationship, I do get lonely sometimes but honestly all that romance stuff seems exhausting. Id rather just chill with my friends & do my hobbies.
Hope everyone finds what they’re looking for out of life❤
I'm 66. Maybe you have more options than you think. I was surprised to learn how in demand American men are in many other countries. Living in the US is living in a bubble. Relationships are very different in most of world. Columbia, Brazil, Eastern Europe, Asia, SE Asia. In the US, for a guy in his 20's...nightmare.
But say you get on a plane and spend 2 weeks in the Philippines. You'll likely find many women willing to talk with you and be nice. They'll give you a chance. And if a good woman sees you're serious she can fall in love very fast and hard. Scary fast.
You may see a new option for yourself. A reason to put your head down, work hard, live poor to save and retire early in another country. Then look for a relationship, then have kids if you want. For nearly all Americans having kids past 40, 50, 60 is a horror. But that's the American view. Kids are super expensive and a lot of work...but that's only in the US. Even at my age I may marry and have kids because I have the resources to ensure their future and my freedom. A live-in housekeeper/nanny costs $100-200/mo USD plus food. A trained live-in caregiver for me would be $500-1000/mo. I don't plan to change any diapers.
Know your options. They may inspire you for a different kind of life.
"Making a meal for somebody is one of the nicest things you can ever do" = FACT
Socially, you can have a lot of things going against you, but if you invite people to eat at your table, and you put good food on it, you'll never be alone unless you want to be.
Disagree
You missing the part where you make out and sleep together, best part for me is to cuddle all night with someone you love being with. You cant do that with your friends...
@@Pulsarr88grow a pair of balls. You can pay someone to do all of that.
Think about if cuddling and sleeping with someone is worth risking your career, your security, your freedom, and your sanity
Those people you invite to your table have to be bringing something to it as well.
Don’t invite and feed freeloaders just because you’re lonely.
@@torachan23I feel it’s the age old adage of Shakespeare that is the most poignant reminder. “It is better to have truly loved and lost, then to have never known love before.”
I just turned 34 and am still single. I make six-figures, am good looking, have a good heart, am mature and like to have fun/travel and am still single. Contrary to popular belief, you can have everything going for you and still be single. I've been in two serious relationships spanning 1-2 years, my most recent one almost went to marriage but I bailed when I found some truths about her post-engagement that she kept from me. I've wondered if there was something wrong with me for being single this long, but after reading the comments I'm finding that it's more common to be single at this age than I thought.
Man, it's kinda the same for me. However I'm far from these income numbers (Central-Europe) I'm financially quite stable and the other aspects are like yours, I've never even made it to a damned first date however everyone liked me I asked out. Women are damaged in their minds and souls, with no self-respect, confidence and wisdom of what they want to do with their lives. I've had enough even though I haven't tried getting dates 100s and 100s of times, in that case I was probably insane by today.
@peterjenei1619 If every girl has rejected you, it might be time to evaluate yourself and find out why. I'm single too but I realize women are not the problem.
Considering how you seem to be making up your entire self-worth by how much money you make, and how you look, i'd probably reconsider the part about you being "mature"..
Not that it's not fine to have a degree of outward confidence, but these bragging points mean literally nothing in the face of actual value.
@@Celeborn93 when that's what women judge you on, that's what's important to consider when thinking about why you're single.
Feminism is the problem, which is 100% of what datable females believe in. The attitude that females have is the problem, which makes females the problem. Yes, there are bad "men," but way less than what females like to carry on about.
I agree. I always felt worse in the months after a break up than I ever did not dating for months or years at a time. Loneliness seems to be one of those things that comes easier to people who date often. That’s not to say you shouldn’t date at all, but some people never remain single long enough for the wound to heal. It’s like a hangover that never quite goes away cause you can’t stop drinking.
Needed to see this
So true
Well said!
Same...when you're single loneliness is a inconvenience. But when you have something and then you know you lost it it hits alot worse...if you try to rush into something after it'll just be fake. It's better to focus on picking yourself back up and doing what you need to do in life and being independent then before trying at another relationship.
I say if it's easy for you to get girls still just do mutual hookup only no strings attached and make sure they know about it so theirs no guilt or motivation to chop off your 🌭
Make sure you're alright first because you also can't take care of someone if you can't take care of yourself
Only downside to remaining single is the people around you moving on. For me, this is happening more and more each year. Eventually you may be left with little to no friends unless they also remain single.
Damned if you do. Damned if you don’t.
That is not the only downside (obviously).
This is something I have pondered a few times as I enter into my thirties. I feel as my friends get married and/or begin to have kids, their families will begin to grow and their lives will become much more busy. They won't have as much time to hangout or I may lose them all together as I enter into old age. Their lives change, but mine stays fairly static.
@xslayerz3093 I don't plan to get married or have kids, kids especially not so I'm ok with it. But the friend situation may eventually get hard.....
I’ve noticed that too.
I was a late bloomer, didn't get into my first proper relationship until I was 29. But then it was several years of bliss and loads of fun, but it fell apart dramatically after 8 years. Took quite a while to get over that but now I can feel very OK being single. I haven't found the The One yet, but I've been in decent relationships since then. Just after a while it wasn't quite it for me. Thinking more about what you actually want is good advice. I find that even in my 40s I'm still needing to learn that it's ok to be discerning and you don't need to commit to the first person who you have fun with. Yeah part of me wishes I had a stable family by this time but it is what it is. I can truly enjoy being by myself. Make sure you have one or two good friends and try to have good relationships with your family. Travel.
I feel like I'll get over it easier when I'm not a virgin..I'm still going through that phase where I don't want to end up like Napoleon.
I'm in a very similar situation. 28 and never had a real relationship. Hell, I've never even managed to get a date. At this point it feels like it's too late for me. Like I'm so inexperienced that even if I _did_ manage to get a date, any girl who found out about my inexperience would see it as something wrong with me. How do I explain that my whole life I've been a combination of socially awkward and afraid of offending anyone, leading to me not even trying until I realized I was running out of time?
So my question is: how did you do it? What did you do differently that changed things for you?
@@_Stormfatheryou need to get confident! Never show a women your weak side! I got confident through photography. I asked women on comic conventions (dont laugh😄) if i can take pics of them. Now i switched to videography. That helps A LOT. You get in a not sexual conversation. There you can train to be confident.
Loneliness... At first it is weird, but then its addictive.
I think there’s a season for everything. Being on your own is fine. Being in a relationship is fine if it’s a good, healthy relationship. People should do whatever they want to do at whatever stage in life they’re at.
i’m 55 and was married and seperated by the time i was 27. I Spent 12 years as a single guy, i was not lonely, i went out regularly and met ladies and i’m not ashamed to say got laid on a sometime regular basis. Then i dated someone for 18 months and it was great, regular sex and someone to go to dinner with and parties. Been on my own now up to date and i’m happy, go out when i want, got a well paid job and i’ve actually holidayed on my own. If the times right it’ll happen, if not it’s no big deal!
Kind of a different experience than someone who's been alone and unloved up until their late 20s and counting
Yep-I was separated from the x at 28 and have been alone ever since. But being married was when I was the loneliest!
@@nightfighter7452yea i truly believe youre just not trying when youre in that position
I think you need to see both sides of the coin. If youre missing experience of one you will always wonder what it's like. Only when you fully understand both sides you can actually make an informed decision about how you want to live. Otherwise you're just guessing - but if youre genuinely happy with guessing then that is perfect too.
@@nightfighter7452people in that situation usually have a quality or qualities that keep them there. You cant complain about not being loved when you're unlovable.
I'm in my mid-50s. I've been single my whole life. And I can honestly say that I have never experienced a single day of loneliness. I just don't don't need to be attached to another person to feel good about myself or to enjoy life. I like people, but I do not need them. I don't need anyone's approval or validation.
"Bombs dropping on babies. That's probably a good way to end this."
- Bill's editor.
I dated a lot through teens and early adulthood. I've been happily single now for over a decade. Maybe I'll find someone again, but if not, life is good like this.
Yeah I bet life is good you're able to just bang any chick you want. In my case it's fucking bullshit. The only chick I've been able to hook up with was this crazy chick who was on a bunch of medication clearly her kind wasn't right.
Just finalized my divorce in June after 8 years of marriage. I'm 41, and do not think I will settle down again. It's really not about sleeping around for me, it is all about finding peace and readjusting for the future. It's more than just finding a good woman, it is about compatibility and I will take advice from others and take time for me!
Or get on a plane to SE Asia. A place like the Philippines. It will open your eyes to what women were like in America before 1960. There are bad women there, but many are really great.Becareful though because most fall in love deeply very fast, like a couple days. Both of you. I suggest not falling in love. Just find out your options. Then you can return and have a goal to work toward. But few can not fall in love.
I'm pushing 68 this year. Retired military. Never married and I can't even imagine having someone I have to check with before doing things.
That’s a refreshing addition. Most military dudes (I know a couple) were the first to rush into marriage and to tye the knot again before hitting 30.
Is there like peer pressure or money incentives to rush into a marriage? It’s practically a phenomenon.
@@jpined14 Money incentives. You don't have to live in the barracks. The barracks living does suck. Solution is, get married, move out and into an apartment. IN addition, you get BAQ, "Basic allotment for quarters", and Separate rations for your food. This adds up. And you have someone that you believe will give you sex. Divorce rate in the army is well over 60%, and the army can't figure out why. Most of my army buddies are on their 2nd marriage, some on their 4th. Well, we enlisted guys aren't known for our intelligence. Just a fact. I did 4 years straight in Korea, came back single and no one could believe it. I just like doing my own thing. I had to be "responsible", 12 hours a day, that was enough. I wanted the other 12 for myself.
@@dan6442 That makes sense and you seem very logical in your reasoning.
Idk why so many men are eager for even more burdens outside of work.
One of buddies is a military guy and rushed into a marriage with a woman he met thru an international dating site.
Looks like it’s going to crap now but he admitted he’s just gonna go back to the same site and try again. Very foolish of him.
4th marriage? Yikes! These cats don’t learn a damn thing. I guess my friend’s idea shouldn’t surprise me.
Keep yourself busy and learn new things. And Bill is right about having interests and how they are important to you. I never mind seeing my boyfriends on the weekends because during the week, I can focus on myself and interests.
The only advice : "Don't ever chase a woman that is not strongly attracted to you".
I'm addicted to being single. There isn't anyone out there worth losing this peace of doing exactly as I wish.
Whatever makes u sleep at night lil bro
@@MostL4DBoys exactly
47 and single and don't actually mind it ive been in 3 long term relationships and a few shorter ones and now I enjoy my own time now i can cook clean and take good care of myself without someone doing my head in plus i get to watch and buy whatever i want to without the hassle of hiding whatever ive purchased for myself 😂 😂.
You need to evaluate the underlying sadness in this comment
I'm 38 and recently realized I'm single because I just don't care about other people at all. People these days seem wayyy too self-involved and I really don't want to be a party to that behavior. If I had kids with someone I might try to make it work for them but really I'm glad I don't have kids.
So I got a dog. She's my best bud; she has no ego, no social media, no onlyfans. All it took was a stupid dog for me to realize I care more about an animal than any "partner" has ever cared for me so that's why I stopped giving a shit about other people.
@@haydencoulson3389eriously. I know the comment means well but it can easily translate to:
I’ve tried three goddamn times to make it work with someone but I’m 47 now and I’m just done putting in the effort. And I gave it three good tries too because there is nothing like a deep, intimate relationship with someone. I jerk off like I’m in high school again, and I watch a lot of TV and collect material objects to overcome the waves of depression I feel from being so alone.
@@mobucks555 THAT´S ME! Just need the dog, on the steps to get one! Thanks for confirming my thoughts buddy! Cheers!
@@Ezekial2517 A lot of projection going on here. Hillarious.
My fiance who I loved more than anything in the whole world left me and moved in with a guy she claimed to hate and blamed it on me for not having a "dignified" enough job while I paid my bills and worked on a new career. As much as it hurts like hell I am going to take this time to be single and not even think of entering something that can hurt that much again. Maybe I'll find something good on accident, who knows. In the meantime I'm going to learn new things and thrive
she did you a big big favor, leaving you before you signed the paperwork. it stings in the short term, but it would have been a blood bath in the long term if you actually married her.
@@1MinuteFlipDoc my thoughts exactly. Only tremendous hell awaited me if I stayed with her. Good luck to that dude lmao
She wasn't a keeper, if someone dumps you for your job, you dodge a bullet. It's like it is divine intervention. Yes, the hurt and feelings are real. Give it time, mourn and move on, don't let the experience paralyze you for finding a person that appreciates you. Become or be, perhaps you are already, the right person for someone. Now is a good time to improve in yourself, go to the gym, unless you do already. Pick up a new skill, meditate, journal, enjoy nature, enjoy life and new company.
If she comes back, I wouldn't look back at all. Just based on your comment, she had big red flags in her life. Love or infatuation can sometimes be blind. Learn to recognize red flags.
I don't know, just wanted to throw something your way! Things will be better, don't lose hope or get stuck, good things are coming your way.
@@winyonzentrada I appreciate your words. I'm doing all of that and trying to become the best me and thrive. I'm not looking back no matter what she says
Don't be too hard on yourself . When I was unemployed and a heavy drinker I had more one night stands because I think women are attracted to the 'waster' not caring archetype. It's a counter intuitive process. Still focus on being the best you can be, however.
bill burr has the best unfiltered advice. Like that crazy uncle youve always wanted and never had.
I remember a line from a movie that said, " a man is born as a single individual, yet he dies as many men". It's very true that we live as many personalities throughout our life depending who our audience is at the moment. Along that path we share time with lovers and sometimes find "the one". Then life interferes and we lose her. Now we have to return to where we were when we met. It's very difficult to move on from that moment as we have attached so much of ourselves to that person. I am facing that now at 73. Been a long road, but still here. Thought I found the one. 9 years later,single again. Understand what most would feel after the loss of those feelings of contentment. It's difficult to lose, shared emotions that only a lover can provide. And when she leaves, a hole is left in your heart and a world that seems insurmountable. Probably will be others that come along but each time it takes a toll.
Guess you have to learn to always maintain that you are the priority and they are the guest in YOUR life.
40. 2 kids. Separated almost 3 years. I don't have the energy to start over again and get hurt. I still kinda want someone but just don't have it in me right now. Focusing on myself and my kids.
I'm 39, single and not dating. I am 100% focused on my craft but sometimes I would like someone to share this life with. I'm content though and feel blessed to be healthy.
Not lonely, no kids, no ex-wife, no alimony , loving life ,no fears of dying alone (we do anyway)
Never been happy being in a relationship. Being single has always worked better for me.
I'm in a relationship of nearly 4 years. Never felt quite so lonely. I felt better being alone. Every single move I make is met with conflict and I'm not allowed to be myself without being accused of trying to attract other women, which I don't want. I don't want anyone, not even the one I have.
Sad thing is, this is not an isolated thing. A few relationships have been like this and I'm just over it. I don't have a need to be with anyone. I can do everything and provide for myself just fine, I don't get lonely when I'm alone. Looking back all my life high points have been when I was single which then attracted a lady, we got together, and then the downward spiral begins. I know many that feel this way. I believe the real pandemic in the USA is codependency.
It's just not worth it.
You may have to realize that the type of women you seek out for relationships are just a toxic profile. Many of us have that problem - women talk about dating hot jerks all the time and regretting it. Men are no different and we have this bad tendency to keep expecting women to be awesome while finding out they aren't. Solution is, have better standards, be patient, and run when you see red flags. Don't be desperate and end up making concessions because that leads to misery, with nobody but to blame but ourselves.
Being "hot" is not a standard of women. Chasing "hot" women means you're not thinking whatsoever what it is that you REALLY want (unless you're up front and just want a fling). The fact that men repeatedly do this and then hate all women (like women hate all men) makes it all a self-fulfilling prophecy. Give women a chance, the types who maybe don't quite fit your profile. See what happens - you may be surprised.
Yep control freaks... My Ex I couldn't even walk through the shops without being told im perving!!!
A man doesn't know what true happiness is until he's married.........and then it's too late
🤣
😂😂😂
This dude is the most naturally funny comedian out there right now imo. Him and Dave Chapelle
You’re about 5 years late on this statement. But they’re still good
@@unconventionalguitarist9129 agreed, this seems like something i would've said a few years ago. both of those dudes are pretty much resting on their laurels now.
Bill is definitely better.
Unless you're talking about Chapelle's Show.
@@sosaysthelegend Exactly Bill way better Dave says mostly Shock Value and I'm a black guy I love black comedians LOL Bill and the late Robin Williams Patrice O'Neal and Robin Harris always seem to be down to Earth funny
Matt Rife?!?!?!
He's definitely right about going out and do what you want when your single because once you are with another person you won't have that luxury anymore or as much
I am 46, never been married, childless, I think I dodged a bullet.
my loser dad was married 9 times and one of his wives shot him in the back of the head when he was sleeping.
@@Jubdasbruh
I'm 31. Never married, no kids, and I've been single for 3 years. I prefer the freedom of not being in a relationship. You can live life on your own terms. I would be wirh someone if the right person came along, but I'm not looking...! Keep doing your thing, single fam.
It's different if you're a pretty girl and have a lineup of probably about 5-6 guys that are already into you. You can virtually choose when you want to pickup where you left off and jump back in. If your a guy and you're socially awkward it takes a lot more effort than "if the right person comes along...", It's months if not years going through the revolving door of dating trying to find someone decent.
@@WeiserBenYep. It is absolutely not the same as a woman. You have your pick of plenty of candidates nonstop, and women, especially pretty ones, will never know the utter aloneness most men face.
@@WeiserBenmaybe try to stop being such an anti social loser? Or just blame women
@@RegisteredNurse926cry harder, your hand will never tell you that you're weak and unmotivated
@@andreaholcock8992 spotted the bot.
The loneliest I ever felt was when I was "happily married".
Bill has always been giving very good relationship advices, and most impressing thing is his advices keeps getting better.
Shit I've been single 10 years now it taught me a lot about myself. I like being alone honestly no bullshit to deal with
It gets easier as time goes by. I'm at 8 years solo now. I go do things I love because I'm absolutely passionate about them. I'm out living life as we all should be. A man's peace of mind is everything. Something to be grateful for once you achieve it. I'm always hearing stories of men getting played from friends, coworkers, etc. and listening to BS women talk nonsense entitled shit. Just solidifies each passing day that going on alone ain't all that bad. I'm all good. Hope you fellas find a contentment among yourselves...✌️
Single is the new married. Married people were high status before now the tides are changing
I got divorced 5 years ago after being married for 15. When my ex left I thought it was horrible but as time went on I learned that single living is much better than intertwining my life another person. At least for me it is.
I’m literally nineteen. And watching this video has given me a great deal of insight and I appreciated this, thank you.
So sick sick of seeing dipsh*ts all over the internet unnecessarily use the word “literally”. Stfu
U got like 10 years til time to look to settle down. Use this time to develop yourself, get good at something, make money, get jacked etc. Don´t waste time on playing the relationship game that young, it´ll be a waste of time as ur not yet even the man ur really gonna be. And by that time you will also know better how to recognize a good quality woman that u really want in ur life. I mean date, hook up and have fun, but don´t put significant time on it yet. Unless ofcourse u rly just stumble on the love of ur life, then go for it ofc. Falling in love is fun too.
So what i mean is that some times we might have this idea in our heads, that we have to do something a certain way, like we have to have a gf or a relationship and live this way. But thats rather a false image put in our heads by movies an so on.
@@marsvai2410 I appreciate the advice dude. I’ve put off getting into relationships since I got out of my last one a little over a year ago, the thing is watching everyone around you have relationships you feel oddly pressured to get into one. I’ve realized I’ve got a life to live and nows the time to do it.🙏🏻
Relationships in First is sweet but success and brotherhood is much better.
I'm 37 and have been single for three years. It's just not worth the risk of being taken to court and losing half your shot and only seeing the kids every other weekend. 18 years 18 years got u for one of your kids got u for 18 years. The current court system is a tragedy.
Its ok to be single and not have kids.
Agreed. I'm 29 and always been single. I'm quite used to be lonely.
@@VidyaBros1you’re alone. Not lonely. 💯
54, never married. Haven't been on a date in 30 years. Don't regret that at all.
no it aint
@@agbradio5894sucks for you then
I‘m 41 and my Wife left me for one of her Clients(she owns a dog school) after 11 years (7 of them married). Basically I lost everything and it hit me real hard. This happend in September 22. I‘m still kinda messed up, takes time I guess. I‘m tryin to find my mental point of origin to find peace of mind again.
💪
Stay strong brother, someone or something better could be around the corner!
It takes time. I know this sucks. Stay strong and slowly you’ll get out of that hole and feel better.
"As long as you don't feel the need to hunt" LOL
Being single and being in a relationship isn't any different. At the end you still suffer equally, just in different ways. So pick your poison. And always be aware, that the human mind longs for things it doesn't have. If you are single, you long for a partner. If you have a partner, you long for freedom. Both of these longings are instinctive and illusionary. Both will haunt you forever.
Finally some true wisdom written.
I can’t believe so many men can’t comprehend this or how many of them are so needy for affection.
Kinda cringe.
33 and still single all the time
It's fine. Speaking to married friends cure any worry right away.
Same here!
I feel lonely all the time. ALL the time. It’s great! The best thing about it is that I expect nothing from anyone and, even better, no one expects anything from me! It’s the best. It’s selfish, but it’s the best.
I totally agree. I absolutely HATE obligations. Even obligations for things that I like. I prefer to do what I want when I feel like it.
@@ItsAllAboutGuitar This reminds me of that Louis CK bit about sitting and how if someone says he needs to get up for any reason, he needs to be given all the information before he gets up.
Love your comment.
@@seerstone8982 I’m not sure, but I’m about 70% certain that only guys shave people off their lives to avoid having to deal with them because men won’t leave women alone. Women, even if they are as sick of people as I am, even if they want to be left alone, they can’t. Women don’t pursue men anywhere near as much as men pursue women. I wonder if that tends to make things easier or harder on women?
Been single for a good while. It was difficult getting past the separation at first but in time it came. I honestly don’t remember when it happened but ever since I’ve been able to truly enjoy my time with myself.
I still enjoy the company of people like family but real friends are hard to come by and possible girlfriends are even harder. I’ve never actively searched because I don’t require it but I’m very much open to coming across the right person and taking a chance.
Thing is the “right” person is REALLY hard to come by. I’m sure one day the opportunity will present itself but until then I’m gonna enjoy the freedom I have and I hope the “right” person is doing the same because that’s when you truly get to understand yourself and what you want in life.
Too many people rush into companionship because they’re too afraid not to be a part of something. Point is, find yourself before you try finding someone else!
I’m 41, single, never married, no kids. I used to get really lonely. I felt like marriage was this ultimate goal that would be truly fulfilling and without it I was broken or lacking somehow. These days I’m terrified to get married, looking at divorce rates etc. I don’t want to lose my house and have to start over again. I have a good life. I work part time, hike, snowboard tons, have plenty of hobbies etc.
What I find difficult is that most people my age ARE married with kids. So it can be difficult to spend time with friends because they have family commitments. It’s been fun being adopted as ‘uncle’ to so many of my friends kids but it’s not the same. It’s also recently started to bother me that my blood line will end with my death. That’s something that was never important to be until now.
The best things in life are your relationships with friends and family. Period. Not motorbikes or careers or money etc (don’t get me wrong, I love motorbikes!) It’s your relationships. I think our culture sets us up for failure when it comes to marriage. I also don’t see a lot of women that I would consider making that kind of commitment to. I still have hope though. But it’s a good thing to create your own life, your own meaning, achieve your own goals.
The grass is always greener. I’ve felt just as alone in a crowd as on my own. And married people still experience loneliness at times.
Anyway. I don’t really have a point but just wanted to share. Some really good comments here.
Hey, thanks man
Got to keep busy
Get out of your community, possibly your country. If your culture is letting you down find a new culture. The world is bigger than your neighborhood man
36 years, never had a girlfriend, the loneliness pains me every day. If I allowed myself unhelpful introspection, that feeling would physically clench my heart and sink it like you're in a car in that peak jump moment before the drop. I mastered the skill of ignoring that feeling the best I can and simply enjoy the rest of life. This is not an advice, it would be a shitty advice if it would. It's just a description. Freedom is fine, it has great benefits, but I'm simply not built that way, it's who I am and not what I value the most.
I'm sorry man, I know how that feels. I had only one gf in highschool for a few weeks then nothing all during my 20s. Got into a relationship at 29 that lasted 8 years. Was devastated when that ended. But since then I've learned that a relationship doesn't make you happy and you can be very happy by yourself too. But I can understand that perspective is hard to get when you've never had the experience first. So I hope you do find that relationship, but maybe also to experience the breakup and finding yourself again after that ;)
But really, loneliness is something you create in your head. Plenty of married guys (and women) are fucking lonely. Hopefully you have some friends or family. Even a pet or a good neighbour. You can be "alone" but not lonely.
Just remember that being in a relationship with the wrong person can be hell. My last relationship lasted 4 months. It got to a point where she was complaining about everything and she made me feel very unappreciated. So I broke it off with her. Now I have all this freedom, and just as important, peace and quiet.
I’m 50 live in the NYC area and got married at 37 and still happily married with 2 kids. I met a lot of women being single and had a bunch of relationships. I always tell my single young friends that are dating when you think you are missing out on something (a good time, a more attractive person or wanting to do something else) and find the person you are with is a drag it’s over. Move on. Don’t try and make it work bc it never will. Many think marriage is something you have to do. It’s not!!!
I LOVED being single after i left my woman of 16 years. She treated me like shit and i dipped tf out. Now I'm with the most incredible woman who gives me everything I needed that my ex wasn't giving. It's great. Someone will come along but you need to put yourself out there.
That's a fact. If you want to meet somebody, you're going to have to put yourself out there. And good for you man.
Big facts
I've never been lonely; and I been single for a long long time....was engaged twice but never married and now I cherish my time alone...
Dying alone isn't what scares me. It's all the years between now and then that pisses me off. Fast forward, please.
I’ve been on and off in relationships for many years. I’m in a relationship again now, and I’m fairly happy. I just say there’s pros and cons to both. I love being single, I do everything I want to do, live however I want to live, it’s awesome. And hooking up with some random chicks from time to time is great. The biggest issue I would have was when the weekend would come, sometimes I wish there was someone there to spend the day with, and the night with, and there could be times of loneliness. I would never have these feelings during the week, between work, gym, and everything else I needed to do, I didn’t need anyone else around.
But being in a relationship has all kinds of challenges you need to deal with.
I'm 23 and feel the pain. I'm still really young, haven't watched porn in 3 or 4 months I can't remember. Going to work everyday, karate 3 times a week. It sucks because I still haven't had a girlfriend. No kiss, still a virgin, haven't done anything with a girl, and just imagining it frightens me. Not as if I'm scared, but more extremely nervous. Chicks aren't scary I know (well some of them are), but since I was a kid, having crushes on girls and so on, seeing friends of mine in highschool getting girlfriends, losing their virginities and so on. You feel left out. It makes you depressed, because you want that. You wish you could be lying in bed next to a beautiful women, waking up in the morning and turning over and seeing her there. Going out places, holding hands, having a laugh together, singing to rock n roll and 80s pop music in the car; eventually settling down and having kids, getting married, or the other way round. It's just really hard and nerve racking the thought of going on a date, meeting a complete stranger, worrying what you say, how to impress her. And then how does it evolve into a relationship? When do you start kissing her, eventually having sex. How do you get there?
It worry's me almost everyday. At work I'm a vehicle detailer, and I clean motorhomes, vans, cars etc.
I see customers come in who are these beautiful women from overseas; a lot from sweden or wherever. A lot of blonde women. Either my age or older, or possibly a tiny bit younger. How do I struck up a conversation with a girl, how do you ask for her number without sounding like a nervous wreck, potentially turning her off you because of you being really nervous.
A lot of people my age and even younger mostly have already experienced relationships and so on; and it feels like you're on your own. I understand there are most definitely girls out there in the same position as me. But when you're by yourself, alone with your thoughts, and surrounded by people, especially your mates who can just chat to chicks so easily. Those girls like them.
There have been girls that have liked me in the past of course. As kids. And possibly girls who liked me when I was a teen, but didn't tell me about it, or no one else told me they liked me.
And now with all the crap nowadays with people in my generation acting all weird and so on. Sleeping around. It's hard to find a genuine girl. Wish it was the 50's or something, when love meant something. Relationships meant something. Marriage meant something. People used to actually, properly fall in love back then. You meet a beautiful girl, and that's it. You grow old together.
I hope I meet a girl someday. As I am currently going through mental health issues right now. OCD issues and so on. Still recovering from a decade and long porn addiction.
I'm sure there is a girl out there. And I'll be looking back on this as a memory. I'd be with a girl, married, kids, looking back on my earlier years, thankful that I found someone.
I hope others my age are in the same boat.
From Melbourne, Australia :)
I'm 22 and im just same as you brother.I'm lost while people are having fun,socializing,sharing their life with their friends and bonding, getting into relationships and kissing,hugging,having sex etc.I do not know what to do I think I just lost interest in life and just suffering in this cold ditch of loneliness.
Reading this made me so sad because I completely relate.
Just knowing that you’re far from the only one feeling this way makes me feel a little bit better
I am in the exact same situation as you are, I am 24. But for me not a single girl ever liked or even looked at me, not even 1 second in my life, and I feel like no girl ever liked me secretly, maybe I am wrong.
I have no idea, but your comment resonated with me. I'm 35 and still single, but if I'm honest I havn't really had my life together until recently. Joined the Navy at 18 basically because I would have been kicked out of the house (or that was the impression I got, at least) and have only had sex once in my life with a "lady of the night" (which I would not recommend, by the way). Got out of the Navy at 22 because it just wasn't my thing. From there I still kind of coasted off of the Navy (G.I. Bill allowed me to live for free as long as I was going to school) and basically did that off and on (switched degrees and jobs a bunch) until I finally finished a couple years ago and got my Associates in Health Science (which I'm not even using btw lol).
I did odd jobs until a little over a year ago when I finally got a full-time with Citi Bank, which allowed me to get my own place. I have to say, after living at the mercy of the Navy and other people (family and an unrealiable roommate) it feels great to finally have my own place. Who knows, maybe some day I will have a woman, maybe not. Take it one step at a time.
there are many more out there than you can imagine. quick tips and advices: join different courses, such as dance courses, or other martial arts too, learn a musical instrument, cooking classes, etc. You will inevitably meet someone, and if you don't meet her there, you will meet some great people along the way that eventually know someone to introduce to you. I know this sounds like tabboo and i got stuck in that, but just try to enjoy the things in life, family, spend time with friends, visit places whatever you like and focus on worrying less on finding "the girl" because they usually appear when you least expect it! the more you expect it, the less likely you are to find her! weird but that's just life. Also, spending at least 1 hour of gym every day, it does help with mental anxiety/depression if you are having that, it really does after at least a few weeks of consistency you feel it.
The best of luck! (and to anyone reading this!)
There is one problem with most modern men.
They’ve been programmed to be dependent on women’s validation since their birth.
- at home a boy’s behavior is evaluated by his mother and grandmother.
- in kindergarten and later school it is evaluated by a female teacher.
- later in the university and jobs there surely will be the female higher ups who’ll evaluate men’s behavior.
Modern men due to lack of male role models were programmed to seek female validation and think they are worthless without it.
I doubt that in the ancient times any Samurai, Viking or Spartan warriors really cared about female validation.
The cult of the female validation in the modern world is artificial and men must overcome it.
I'm 30, never been in a relationship. I wasn't motivated to date in college, and then became motivated in my 20s when dating became much more difficult. My motivation these days comes and goes. I just tell myself that wherever my life goes, it will be a good life. Good family, good friends, good hobbies, good mood. Still somewhat trying to figure out my long-term career
The first time I felt lonely was also the first time I lost a girlfriend I actually cared about. It wasn't a habit. It was feeling appreciated and having something to look forward to, something you are building together. I travel and do things, but when they are over, I have to find something else to work toward.
When you tell women what the deal is, most of them will walk away. Find someone who will take the deal or go it alone.
Crazy, my first seriously relationship was late 20s. Was total cool with being single up until I broke up with her. Been chasing that relationship feeling ever since
You can have women being single… the thing is, you don’t need all the drama and high costs of being in a relationship to get some love in your life. Let the woman choose you and fill your needs. If not just let them go.
Learn to enjoy your own company. You will never be lonely.
Single for over 20 yrs no problems here I do what I want and totally happy every time I meet a girl, the craziness happens, we split and I'm back happy again !!
Checking off items on your bucket list before you’re in any serious relationship is fantastic advice. I also think by challenging yourself and overcoming obstacles, you’ll be a far better person AND partner if/when you do end up in a serious relationship.
62 and never been in a relationship or dated, I never get lonely or bored, Loner life is something I just accepted and will probably die this way, it's ok
I don't have the emotional energy to sift through so many women until I find a good one all while risking knocking the wrong one up.
I'm 27 and I am happily single. Getting married isn't all what it's cracked up to be.
Being married isn't the alternative to being single :)
@@Celeborn93
Meh, whatever it is, it is wonderful.
Definitely, staying single is the alternative to being married.
@@Apachemiwokmexican777 No. Marriage is a ceremonial choice you do for whatever weird spiritual reasons.
Being in a relationship is the alternative to being single.
@@Celeborn93 I agree with that. What I am saying is if the person decides not to be married, the alternative is being single.
I'm six years in and I've never been happier being single. I've kept my focus on self improvement. It makes a big difference. I enjoy my time alone. I guess I'm that weird guy. I swear I don't kill people.
As a creative person of 43 years I have never felt lonely until being around others. I have realised I wierd people out mostly with my depth of thought and constant ideagasms but perhaps the depth of inner space is the key to contentedness. People I help in my community profession who are deeply traumatised by loss of a partner (divorce to old age) also seem rather skin deep in the above described dimension. At this point in my life I feel I would experience the inverse of the usual reason for a broken heart if I were to "find" someone. A potentially never before realised freedom rising in the place of a tried and true one, just turned around from the usual experiences of people.
A lot of solid advice on his part, for sure. But me? In my early 50's and single for the last 8 years or so, I've come to realize I wasn't meant to be married or anything like. Had to learn that the hard way, sadly. But better to learn that and know it than to go about my life totally oblivious to it the way many if not most guys appear to be.
An important thing is to realise that being in a romantic relationship isn't the only way to connect with people. Also it's better to be lonely than unhappy in the wrong relationship I know a lot of people who are stuck in bad relationships because they are afraid to be alone it's BS. People assume that those who are happy being in their own company are weird loners it's just not true. I have plenty of positive interactions with people and I have some good friends but I'm much happier when I'm on my own.
Single and in my 50's. Friends no longer ask if I want someone in my life they they have (most of them see I am happier than them). I am not opposed to a relationship but I need to be careful. I am happy/content about 90-95% of the time and lonely about 5%. Too many men are willing to fill that 5% and throw away the 90-95% while I am not. Anyone that comes into my life needs to enhance what I already have and I would hope they would be looking to do the same for them.
Wow! I feel exactly the same! However, I couldn't have said it as well as you did. I'm 54 and, like you, friends have stopped trying to find someone for me. I'm sure their wives still are doubtful that I'm truly happy and "must" want to find someone to share my life, as my way of thinking is more rare. Meanwhile, although there are obviously pros and cons of a relationship, I am truly happy alone. Maybe it's that I've become set in my ways and more selfish, but, in my mind, a relationship sounds like it would be require sacrifices I'm not willing to endure.
@@michaelstanton5455 This reminded me of a conversation a friend in my situation had with an uncle of his. His uncle asked why he didn't want someone to share his life with and to have around the house. My friend asked his uncle if he was happy and the Uncle paused for a few moments and then said "well...happiness isn't everything.". My friend just smiled and changed the conversation. The uncle never asked him again.
I was in 3 long term relationships from the time I was 18 until I was 31. Losing the last girl devastated me like nothing ever has done before and I spent the next decade trying to find someone like her that I could hopefully marry. That 10 years was full of absolutely horrific women and misery. I’m now 45 and I never want to be in another relationship again. I frickin love being single, I have so many hobbies and I even started my own business, things I could have probably never done if I were married. It was the best thing that ever happened to me and I’ve never been happier. If men could just get the idea that they have to be with a woman to be happy out of their heads, so many dudes could achieve happiness and greatness. Nothing can stop you when you’re thinking clearly.
Being a bachelor my whole life there is so much societal hate from borrowing money all the way to bitter guy friends and their girlfriends/wives that know you are a threat.
Yup!! Been there!!
I am 67yrs old never married dont have any family. I am never lonely. Loneliness is a taught emotion. If nobody teaches you about being lonely you wont be. I know that sounds crazy because everyone thinks loneliness is real. Its not. If you feel alone go out meet people. Done no more loneliness. For me it helps that I dont really like humans. Anyway my 2 cents.
36 and single. It's been 13 years since I've been in a relationship and later on I relised that I don't need that drama.
Ya just ain't found the right one yet
@@in2webelieve997 For some people there is no right one.
I'm 36 too and although I'm with someone right now I'm gonna dump her today.. Don't need that drama and the bs in my life.. I was single for 7-8 years prior and I miss it. Going back to it
37. same
Are you having sex during those 13 years?