This weird cultural sentiment about certain men finally feeling empathy for women only after having a daughter needs to be examined and then exorcised.
Society infantalizes men. They're allowed to reach middle age without learning empathy or responsibility. They're allowed to develop disregulated emotions while claiming to be logical. They're encouraged to be self centered. The bar is deliberately set low. Why? Because society decided long ago that it was a good decision to pacify the physically stronger members for fear of being hurt. Also, not all men, before someone decides to respond with that.
1000% yes. having conversations with men and them defending it has been so frustrating… i’ve expressed this exact sentiment and heard “well it’s better than not at all it’s a beautiful thing that they can learn it’s better than not at all” like yeah… sure but why do they deserve praise when it’s just breadcrumbing, bare minimum empathy. it should not take something coming from you to gain love and understanding for girls and women.
Yea it reminds me of Chris Watts saying "those kids". My cat is my baby and imagining myself saying "I love that cat so much" feels weird. I would say his name or "my cat".
also him referring to himself as "that man" as he describes the awful things he's done in his past... sounds like he's still trying to deflect accountability in small ways
It’s depersonalization. Using her name shortens the emotional distance to her, which would make it harder to talk about and probably cause him to clam up entirely. He most likely doesn’t want to think about the things he did. No one wants to imagine themselves as a bad person, so when we know we’ve done bad things, or things we perceive as bad, we often try to deny them or find a target we can place the blame on.
Having a daughter isn't where empathy for women begins. Saying a toxic man should have a daughter and then it will change him perpetuates the "woman must fix a man" and people are making that woman "fixing/changing toxic behavior in a man" a daughter. Men are responsible for the things they do, good and bad, not women.
Being the daughter that "changed" the abusive man, it was the most terrifying heartbreaking experience finding out as an adult how evil my favourite person was prior to my birth and the evil things that kept happening behind my back my entire life
there's also zero guarantee that they will actually change, regardless of whether or not they think they will/have. wishing a daughter upon a man with a history of abusing women feels like dooming an innocent child to the very real possibility of abuse.
Also important to note on that interview, he said "that man" who abused her. He's distancing himself from the acts he perpetrated. Ugh I hate it, I hate it all
and the dismissive way he referred to fka twigs as "that woman"... he doesn't see her, or any of the other women who came forward, as deserving respect
I think both can be valid question to ask. I wish we empowered more woman to leave situations. As someone who grew up in a household where my father was abusive to both my mother and us children, at some point, I realised that I couldn't rely on my mother either. She complained about him but also made excuses for him. I've always felt, why don't you do something about it because us children growing up were completely powerless.
@autumwho I'm sure you understand it's not that simple. Sure, NOW you say that you would leave immediately, that you wouldn't "put up" with that, but this is something you truly have no idea how you will react in that situation if put in it. More scrutiny should 100% be put on the abuser
Why not both though? Because I just mentally also can't get my brain to understand why she didn't leave. I don't mean it as a gotcha or to put her down, I just actually genuinely do not understand why she didn't leave.
Can we please also not forget that Shia also abused tf out of Sia. She has wrote songs about that abuse she has faced from him. This is not an isolated incident.
Wow 😭😭😭 I’ve been fiercely advocating for D’Angelo’s content ever since ppl on Twitter claim the second channel is “lazy” and “for clicks.” This second channel informs ppl about important societal issues, and by offering his perspective, I think it teaches ppl empathy and understanding. I just went to FKA twigs’ Insta to like the story updates to show my support - this is what I want to see online, pure compassion 🫂
Shia depersonalizes Twigs, calling her "this woman" repeatedly in the interview people praise him for. Abuser 101 behaviour. There is an all too typically low bar for redemption for these abusers.
People always pull the whole "why didn't you leave?" crap as if leaving automatically means safe. There are women who were still killed by their abuser even after leaving.
Literally!!! W t f???💀 Vic tims are mur der ed when they leave! The FBI needs to help women in situations like these. Ab u se needs to be seen as a federal te rro ri za tion offense, but it’s not🤦♀️😞
This is horribly true, and like. It is a deeply horrible thing, that so many people would rather mourn a poor martyred victim who followed their advice and was lost to it, than *listen to them or reach out and hold their @bu$er accountable before that happens*
D’Angelo!!! I just saw twigs mention you and this video on her story!!! She applauded this video for the accuracy!!! So cool to see you grow and be acknowledged by others for your hard work
I saw this too and went to the video because of her repost! It's really lovely you were able to explain her situation with Shia with respect and justice.
And the f*cked up thing about it is that you can even be consciously aware of that fact, but it's an entirely different beast to make yourself _feel_ it's true. I hope there are happy days in your future, no matter your situation. P.S. Don't get married, kids.
Yeah. I personally understood that when after months of incessant stalking after running away it started to be quiet after they’ve found the next victim. I was unlucky to meet them, as the ones before, as the next ones, but it could’ve been anyone else, it just happened to be me in that moment with that specific person and situation. It kinda helps realizing it, even if it’s depressing knowing how many are and have been in the same situations and worse.
It's crazy how admitting you abused someone immediately means you're forgiven because the WAY people were SO quick to move on from what Shia had done was sickening. I hope Twigs gets her justice!!!
@@dylangriffin5514Its that, and also that the bar for men, especially cishet white men with money and power, is so far in the pits of hell that they get applauded for basic emotional awareness that we teach toddlers
Women's suffering doesn't matter for them, that's it, it's men they're the protagonists, it's their journey their growth their complexity so they get applauded for the bare minimum
The ppl forgiving him are either ppl who e never been abused an survived it, or people who are perps of abuse themselves and feel like it’s their place to accept shias bullshit apologies
I don't know... I was watching a video today where they were interviewing minority folks (black people, gay people etc etc) Trump supporters and a woman said "free R Kelly!" so even he is not completely cancelled which is horrifying.
what she said about not being special to your abuser as an abuse victim is so incredibly true. i remember how bizarre it felt when i found out my abuser had already found someone else she treated the exact same way she treated me just a few years after i finally ditched her. i felt a deep sense of empathy for that girl who was now constantly hanging around my abuser, looking like she truly didn't want to be there. as far as i am aware, she's no longer in contact with her. i hope that to be true. i already knew i'd been a replaceable victim to my abuser by then, it was just a whole different experience actually seeing it happening before me in person. thank you for covering this.
was gonna comment the same damn thing. it was a very particular punch to the gut to finally realize i could have been anyone; i was a means to an end, not a person with autonomy in a partnership. tough pill to swallow for sure, and rarely something people speak out on. massive respect to her for bringing it up, and massive respect to you for continuing the conversation. i hope you've gotten your peace since leaving.
This is something that still sticks with me years later. I remember the very moment I realized and I said “I’m not special to you, you would do this with anyone” and he said “yeah,” like it was obvious. That pain is great, I hope time brings us all healing
finally someone with a large platform is talking about this without bias towards Shai. He literally admitted it. The abuser and abused both claim abuse and for some reason the general public still has this idea that she's using him... Disappointing. I am so happy you made this. Thank you
Honestly I would be surprised if D'Angelo Wallace would not talk about something like this. On such serious issues. And yes it's good that someone with a wide range of audience is talking about this.
There's a certain type of man who says "I love women" when it's obvious that what they really mean is that they love having sex with them, not having actual relationships with them.
His use of the words "cold sores" instead of "Herpes" is incredibly disgusting. Everything about shia labeouf is deceitful as he seeks to downplay every aspect of his abuse. What a terrible person. I feel sorry for his daughter.
I was gonna say. Herpes can in fact break out on more intimate parts of the body instead of just the lips 💀 I feel sick to my stomach hearing him talk about that.
Yes, but also know that 70% of the population has hsv1, which causes cold sores...and most people have no idea. Abt 14% of ppl have HSV2 and only 10-20% of people know....but him knowing and not telling isn't right...but you probably have herpes and and don't know.
I haven’t gotten to that part of the video… As an HSV1 haver, I was raised to call them cold sores, raised to not understand the complexity of the virus. It was definitely a part of my journey coming to terms with it and learning about how disclosure works in new relationships
As someone who has had her husband almost kill her and currently going through the legal process of pressing charges and possibly suing. The fact that abusers cant admit what they did and then have enablers around them, we never EVER get justice. Then we get villainized. It is NEVER fair
It is disgusting how ready to forgive abusers we are if they shed a single tear - or even say one vague sentence about it :( also wanted to say that you are not alone in what you have experienced, I am so glad you survived and I wish you all the best not only with the legal process but also in healing
Great work here. Thanks for including our episode and social clips with twigs in your analysis of this. We're so glad we could help to support her, and so many other survivors, in this moment.
A lot of abusers are like that, "I'll only take responsibility if I can say that I'm also a victim". Reminds me of Diddy's apology, "There were hard times in my life." "I'm making steps to change"
It's also the people that protect the abusers too. Like Jon Bernthal tried to excuse away Roman Polaski brutally r-wording a 13 year old girl because "he'd gone through a lot in his younger years and it did some thing to him." Exactly the same excuse he used to hand wave away Shia's abuse. Makes me sick.
@@Bunn.B People like to say Hurt people, hurt people, but there are millions of people who were hurt in their childhood who chose to work on themselves and be better, so it's a poor excuse anyways.
I worked with a woman who told me her husband gave her HSV, knowing he had it, and their newborn child was diagnosed with neonatal herpes. Which can result in blindness, seizures, and other serious consequences. The fact this man was not telling his partners that he had cold sores, and then a partner had a child, is seriously seriously fucked. There is no shame in having an STI and even things that can't be cured can be treated and controlled. However there is no forgiveness for putting someone else and a baby at risk like that.
This is not victim blaming at all, but a warning and a lesson: *WE MUST BE OUR OWN HEALTH ADVOCATE.* There is no reason to take your partner’s word over LAB RESULTS. We cannot assume, even in MARRIAGE, that your partner or spouse will have your best interest in mind. Get tested NO MATTER WHAT.
@@galaxylucia1898unfortunately HSV doesn't usually show up on a standard blood panel- it generally relies on the presence of active sores to diagnose. So if the person doesn't disclose it or it's not visible at the time (which is most of the time), you are unlikely to know
Yes, but also know that 70% of the population has hsv1, which causes cold sores...and most people have no idea. Abt 14% of ppl have HSV2 and only 10-20% of people know....but him knowing and not telling isn't right...but you probably have herpes and don't know.....but you should be telling your partner if you do know still..and be doing everything to protect your child at a vulnerable age. That being said, you probably have herpes too.
@@galaxylucia1898 Yes, but also know that 70% of the population has hsv1, which causes cold sores...and most people have no idea. Abt 14% of ppl have HSV2 and only 10-20% of people know....but him knowing and not telling isn't right...but you probably have herpes and don't know.....but you should be telling your partner if you do know still..and be doing everything to protect your child at a vulnerable age. That being said, you probably have herpes too.
Thank you for this video. My abuser was finally indicted by a grand jury and charged last week and unfortunately all of his fans are now coming after me. It’s exactly like you said, people tend to believe the accused over the victim. It’s so horrible. This video is a great reminder that there are still decent humans who believe women.
🎉 congrats on the asshole being indicted! I'm so sorry you had to go through that. I'm at least very happy you got your day in court. I get it... similar situation happened to me, except my ex was in the same college and I ended up losing every friend... please don't let the changes and what people say bring you down. At the end of the day YOU know the truth and they have no right to say who should be affected by what, when, how...And take your time healing. It's gonna be hard, but you'll get there. I wish you peace, healing, and love ♡ ps- if you're ever anxious, purple noise is lovely.
@@kittym.h.1926Thank you so much for your kind and supportive message. I’m so sorry you went through something similar and I’m proud of you for telling the truth even if it meant losing people you thought were your friends. I hope you know you deserve SO much better than how you were treated ❤ sending you hugs 🫂
I am SO freakin proud of you!! You are so much braver and stronger than you think you are!! You are so amazing!! Bless your heart! I only ended up getting away from my abusive partner after almost 10 years because he passed away, which has led to it's own problems. I hope you're able to find the peace and happiness you deserve because you do deserve it sweetheart!
I hope you're okay and safe. Please don't let them get to you, they're all naive idiots for choosing to believe an abuser over the victim. You're the only one here whose feelings matter.
as someone with a deep love for fka Twigs since LP1 it is depressing to see the misogynoir running through headlines that treat her as if she's some nobody…she's a fucking legend in the experimental pop world and (like every other victim on Earth) never deserved to go through what she did. thank you for covering this 💜
What songs of hers would you recommend? I mostly listen to a lot of industrial and grunge music but she sounds cool and I’d like to give her music a listen.
Brb crying bc twigs saw this and I'm outraged and so happy you helped her be seen. My love for you and your content, even since you began, is boundless.
Women in abusive relationships are often told that if they leave it means they're cruel or disloyal or not trying hard enough to make things work all the way up until they actually do leave, at which point they're then told they're stupid for not leaving sooner and letting it happen to them. Sometimes they'll continue to be accused of both for the rest of their lives. There's just no winning.
@@Norcat10 We absolutely can and should judge abusers. There's reasons that influence people to be in a bad place, but that doesn't excuse their behavior. Being hurt doesn't give you the freedom to hurt other people.
@@meeomelovescookiesandhisto459 second that…leaving can be dangerous and it’s why you need to have a plan. She did mention how he was threaten to crash the car if she didn’t say “I love you”….thats a prime example of the shit victims deal with 😢😢
Only when it's a male, like amber heard was indeed abused but she added some lies and people have no empathy for her and they do for shia and many other men
I got forced to have a baby at 16 by my abusive older boyfriend. He then tried to kill me a few months after she was born. I literally felt like I couldn’t leave there was no way, until I realized he actually wanted to kill me and he tortured me for hours. I wish I left earlier. Anyone in an abusive situation please leave
I'm so glad u got away fam, it took a lot of courage & strength to leave but u DID IT and that's something worth being proud of. Good for u!! Heck yeah!!
My abuser denies everything, refuses to take a accountability, even though there are court findings of his abuse and criminality. These guys really think they can terrorize you in private but put on a mask around others to get what they want. They say all the right things, but their actions NEVER match up. Scary type of person
I AM SO GLAD THAT D’Angelo is PUTTING MORE OF A SPOTLIGHT ON TJIS. It has given me whiplash seeing people make excuses for Shia. FKA has been through so much. She is so brave, talented, and incredible for her resilience.
Her talent has nothing to do with any of this. No person deserves this, regardless of their talent. But it seems to me the only time there's outrage around this is when you have someone talented being treated inhumane.
i think it’s just hard for a lot of people to wrap their heads around how disorienting abuse is. i didn’t get it until i was abused. it’s like how people watch horror movies and say “i would just kick him!” like, would you?? it’s hard to imagine being in that state of primal fear. you can talk all you want about what the logical course of action is, but even if it really IS as black and white as you think, it’s so hard to see that when you’re in the thick of it.
I'm confused why people ask the victims why instead of the abusers. Its almost like people act like abusers don't have autonomy. They made the choice to abuse someone.
@@obanjespirit2895 It doesn't make sense. That’s what abuse does to a person. It warps the way you see the world and the people around you, to the point where you make decisions an outsider can't understand. Someone who hasn't experienced abuse can't understand what it's like to be broken down as a person to that extent.
I had a feeling she’d see this. D’Angelos videos have a history of making a real difference in public opinion…just checked, and FKA twigs posted clips from this video to her insta ❤
What's crazy is just last week I had to call the cops on a neighbor that had his gf trapped in a car, yelling "these windows aren't gonna save you!". No one was doing anything. Even tho everyone who was home could hear it. I am in a bad neighborhood, rife with meth, but man... It's not easy to call, so at the same time, I understand it. I had to make a written statement, but I'm terrified of the neighbor because I'm a woman that lives by myself, so I can't be seen making the report (even by any neighbors, they all hang out with each other), so I had to go meet the cops down the road. I have PTSD from abuse, so driving there was difficult from being shook up from what I was just subjected to be around. BUT I'm still glad I did it. No one else was going to. Always say something.
it's scary (esp being someone other than a cis man) to be the person to report, it makes you feel exposed and vulnerable, esp if you've been the victim of abuse yourself. what you did what very courageous and i hope you give yourself space and time to heal from that traumatizing experience.
Wild to think that Olivia Wilde, who knew all this information about Shia, still begged this man to be in her movie warning about the dangers of men being in too much control of their wives 😬
If it was written with him in mind, whether to drag him or not, I’m so, SO glad he didn’t end up in the part because he’d be getting PAID to be a piece of sh*t. It’s like what Jordan Teresa pointed out in her Substance video, it’s not the serve you think it is to cast a horrible man in a horrible role - they collect a check!!!
I'm so proud of you. To have FKA herself not only repost but genuinely share how grateful she was for an accurate and empathetic telling of her story. Wow! You really helped her feel understood and by proxy SO MANY OTHERS. Go off king!
"it's not about me- It's about food- I'm just supply- I could've been anyone" - The combination of disappointment that we were never special to this person we loved- while also the liberation in realizing the abuse wasn't our fault, there was nothing we could change about ourselves to please this person- it's their problem-- It's so true
She just wants to use Shia’s fame to boost her failing music career. Every fka twigs album so far has charted lower than the last. She’s a flop and this is her way of desperately trying to remain relevant 😂
@@BigOwl51 Even if she had nothing else going on and had no creative accomplishments, that doesn't excuse Shia's horrific, violent treatment of her. Very sad and twisted perspective that you have! Hope you keep it to yourself next time.
When I came across that clip from the podcast and she said “they all operate the same… I realized I wasn’t special I was just supply” I broke down crying. That’s really how it feels. Not only was the entire relationship a lie but that person never truly loved ME
it makes me sad even thinking about it briefly. the fact that not only did they not love or want me, but they didn’t even want to abuse ME specifically. i was just what was available. i know it’s kind of fucked up to think but. i wish i was something to them
@@Ladyfingers-333 I am so sorry. I don’t know how to deal with the loss, how to reconcile with the fact that I was never special to them. I’m not strong enough . The grief is so overwhelming. I feel like I can’t love myself to the point where I’m okay again, but no one else is coming and I have to stop looking for someone else to save me. It’s just so fucking hard to love yourself when you feel like you do it simply because no one else will. So much loss. I also feel like I’ve lost so many things, more than the years but the innocence. The openness to love and the openness towards other people, the unguarded-ness, the trust I had and hope I had that love was finally coming for me. I feel like I’ll never get that innocence back and I mourn it every day. Love to you and everyone who went through this. I would never wish this position on absolutely anybody .
This topic hits too close to home for me so I won’t be watching but thanks D’Angelo for putting your time into this to share these survivors stories ❤️
Her line about "it's not about you, you're just food" for the abuser really hit home. That's... yeah. I'm at a loss for words right now because of how true that is and how it's putting a whole new light on the abusive relationship I was in many years ago. I'm going to be thinking about that for a while.
Thank you for covering this and standing by Twigs. I feel like women are always told to “just leave it alone” or “not ruffle feathers” and it is so helpful to hear someone back up not only her but anyone else who chooses to stand up for themselves
I see a lot of people commenting on this, but on one hand is he gonna call her “FKA Twigs” (her full stage name) in such a serious moment? You can’t really shorten it to FKA or Twigs, and also using a stage name feels inappropriate when talking about such a serious topic. But also using her real name on a public platform feels like a violation as well? I think his use of “that man” is much more damning imo.
@nari5161 don't think it's in his "long term interest" either... he has opened up about being abusive, that's not a crime. When he he admits being abusive towards a specific person, them we're talking
I don't think he said those things as a real admission of guilt. He was, in my opinion, trying to see how much he could get away with. A lot of narcissistic abusers feel compelled to brag about their abuse as if it's an achievement, and being able to talk about it on a huge public platform and get away with little to no repercussions is a huge ego boost and source of satisfaction for them.
D'Angelo - Thank you for jumping straight into this topic without the intro. Immensely appreciate your efforts in reporting on and relaying nuanced topics such as this with such care xx
@@ivzypetthat's what I was worried about seeing too! I'm glad it seems like most people realize she could be in just as bad and confusing a situation as FKA was.
I don't think Mia has to worry, sounds like she's a bit of a scrapper too. She did get sued for assault after all. She might be the perfect one to put Shia in his place.
Thank you for making this video. This comes at a time when I’m currently in the middle of separating from a DV situation. And it feels like I am being seen and spoken to. Abuse is spirit breaking, but seeing how many people can actually see past the abuser’s bs makes me feel that the world is better than I think. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
the degree this man and his lawyers have gone to belittle and demonize her makes my fucking blood boil. the amount of cases I see like this and yet the victims still lose in the end, I seriously hope that someday the world will take these people seriously, because I don't want another person to die because no one listened to their pleas for help.
When I left my relationship after the worst assault and was looking into legal options, I read a case about a woman whose partner landed her in the hospital and judge and jury ruled "you can't prove she didn't want that"
He’s a narcissistic emotional black hole thats detrimental to anyone that comes in contact with him, leaving them for the worse after his wake. I watched the entire podcast when it came out, but it made me view John B differently as he never challenged Shia’s lack of accountability and it was the “boohoo Shia show”. JB just nodded open mouthed most of the time. I have no clue why anyone platforms this human trashcan, or why he’s allowed to orbit celebrities that have influence especially with kids and YA. He’s had so many ppl want help him, but he refuses said help, thinking an admission of weakness.
definitely frustrating. he doesn't deserve admiration. lying and hurting others while people champion this idea that he's taken accountability because he carefully chose his words... gross.
@@borkingsnark He’s a narcissistic emotional black hole thats detrimental to anyone that comes in contact with him, leaving them for the worse after his wake. I watched the entire podcast when it came out, but it made me view John B differently as he never challenged Shia’s lack of accountability and it was the “boohoo Shia show”. JB just nodded open mouthed most of the time. I have no clue why anyone platforms this human trashcan, or why he’s allowed to orbit celebrities that have influence especially with kids and YA. He’s had so many ppl want help him, but he refuses said help, thinking an admission of weakness.
@@deeksha611I will literally never forgive the internet for making Cellophane a meme with that annoying version of Miss Piggy. Like can she catch a break?!
I highly recommend listening to FKA Twigs interview with Louis Theroux on his podcast back in 2020 if you want to know more about her life story. Her art, her childhood, and she also speaks a bit about her experience with Shia Leboeuf. She seems like such a beautiful soul. Wishing her all the best ❤
Thank you for doing this video. I just reported my childhood abuser and all people have said to me is "you're ruining his life". Like what about the 7 yr old girls life he decided to ruin?
No, he ruined his own life by doing what he did, as well as trying to ruin the life of a literal child. I HATE it when people say this and I'm sorry people are saying this to you.
Didn't realized Mia Goth married Shia and they even had a kid together. This is really sad. I hope her and her daughter are okay. People who are so abusive like Shia are all about taking power away from people and formatting them to be how they want, I don't see a world where he won't be pulling that kind of shit with his child either. I really hope Twigs and any person that Shia abused will get justice and healing. I've been a fan of Twigs for a while and she's an amazing artist and seem like an amazing person too. She's been inspiring in more ways than one and I hope she wins this one. I'm sick of seeing disgusting men like Shia get away with heinous shit because the justice system is so broken.
Him saying how he was competitive and comparing himself to other people actually made something made sense. When I was in an abusive relationship I couldn't understand why he wanted everyone to hate me. Don't you want your friends to like your partner? He would try to turn people against me but they would see how horrible he was to me and called him out. That made him really mad and accused me of turning people against him.
That is such a good point, my abusive ex was very competitive too. It makes sense that for a narcissistic competitive abuser, the victims are treated as disposable accessories to boost the abusers image
@@Stressymessy That's not competition. Siblings and athletes are competitive. Thats vengeance. What's happening, *most likely,* is he's tryna make u "pay" for some "transgression" against him from way before u met each other.
My dad set me up financially in life so I was completely financially dependant on him (a car he bought for me in HIS name etc, a fuel card in HIS name, an apartment he bought for me to let me stay FREE) I though he was the most generous man on earth. Around age 25 I started doing self development and finding my self confidence. I started to become aware of how toxic and draining his energy was to me. When I started practicing a healthy expression of personal boundaries, thats when I first saw his mentally abusive and intimidating side. Its impossible to be an empowered person in an co-dependant relationship. If you are healthy and practicing self love, they are angry and violent towards you, they sense that cant have emotional control over you. If you are insecure, low vibration and submissive, they train you to think you are doing very well in life, but when you feel lower than them, you don't notice their evil.
As a woman who suffered abuse, I don't believe him for a split second. LaBeouf is disgusting and needs serious jail time. He's a danger to everyone around him. These poor women deserve so much support.
This is what pisses me off with predators like Shia and diddy. These men deserve jail and not grace or sympathy. The amount of sympathy that people have for these disgusting human beings angers me. If you excuse this behavior what else would you excuse?
I hope she wins, and I hope that she is able to drown out the hate, and simply live her life. I hope she finds a relationship that is truly loving and respectful. Nobody should have to go through that kind of manipulation.
How dare these victims of domestic abuse be victims of domestic abuse! Why, if I were a person who was constantly being destroyed to the point I had no self-worth, no self-esteem, and possibly little to no physical health I would obviously also be a person who valued myself enough to save up enough money to move where my abuser couldn't find me (because my abuser also let me have a job and financial independence) and if we had kids I would just take them because the legal system is totally cool with that and if the abuser told me constantly that they'd kill me and they could get away with it and proved that point by not being punished at all by the system when I called the cops, I would just leave.
How dare these people have children with abusers and then have to struggle even more because now they have another HUMAN BEING (who they feel responsible for) that is weaponized against them. They should have just left. I certainly would have just left. It's definitely not like I'm saying the same thing as their abuser - that if the kid is hurt, it is obviously their own stupid fault and they should just be better.
The thing is that the people who really think like this just believe they would never get to the point of feeling like they had no self worth or self esteem. In their minds it's a character flaw and personal failing to be susceptible to those things, like they're something that the abused person could have, _should_ have, prevented. The fact that they don't leave their abuser as soon as the first sign shows is a failure in courage. The fact that they don't see the very first signs that something might be wrong as soon as they occur is their own failure in diligence. The rationalizations go on and on ad nauseam.
@@Avendesora Just to clarify, you are saying that this is incorrect thinking right? Like, it's not actually a failure of courage but a terrible result of consistent and intense abuse.
They're incomparable. One is a nasty abusing narcissist and one has a legacy - critically acclaimed singer, songwriter, actor, dancer, model, director she's the real deal and can do everything and i mean *EVERYTHING*. She deserves Shia's level of fame and 100X more.
@ I love you girl, you know what’s uppp! Magdalene was the soundtrack of my life for years, she literally went through so much and she’s the most committed artist to her craft honestly 🤍 these people are missing out on her art.
I’m a physician and it was incredibly difficult to leave an abusive marriage. They slowly grind down your confidence until it is dust. Death by a thousand small insults. They start out as perfect and your dream person, and they find ways to blame you when they start acting cruel. It’s amazing. Everyone should read “Why Does He Do That” by Lundy, it will open your eyes to abuse, helped me leave my abusive marriage.
I’ve followed twigs since 2014. She’s said time and time again that she’s not a fan of the spotlight (e.g., Video Girl). The courage that she’s shown is awe inspiring. Her work with advocacy groups for women that have been abused is amazing. I’m so proud of her for speaking out
I mean, we literally live in a world where someone can stand up in front of a stadium full of people and say "I'm a bad person" or "I'm a racist" or "I'm a fascist" and people will still follow them. I don't understand what happened to us. Or maybe this is just the internet exposing what was broken in us all along. Idk
exactly: remember we are just NOW at a time where people are openly and vehemently against child labor as its inherently exploitative. people like to say we are worse now more than ever when in reality good people are given much more of a louder voice than ever while the exploitative systems that have been normalized are finally being heavily criticized.
A fear of mine is that my ex is going to have a baby anyday. I thank my lucky stars I didn’t. Poor Mia with Shias baby. She will be trapped for a very long time. The poor baby. Awful.
Justice delayed is justice denied 😢 My heart goes to my fave twigs and I hope she can receive some sort of justice and her abuser can be held accountable. There's so many simultaneous abuser stories in the headlines right now (this, Diddy, Tory, Chris Brown) that I really pray for every victim and extend compassion to everyone involved. Believe survivors 💜
"um....i'm slightly sorry....but it's NOT my fault because i had addiction problems....but like i was a bad person only because uhhh....only because i did. a drug and an alcohol. I HAVE A DAUGHTER" wow. stunning accountability
10:05 That was the BEST straightforward answer to this question I’ve ever heard. As someone who suffered from the pattern of abuse from multiple partners starting at the age of 16 (& finally ending in my late twenties), thank you.
i feel so bad for mia goth honestly, i feel like she was groomed into being ok with his insanity and with how abusive he is even towards her, and the fact that they have a kid together is just even worse
I don't know if it explains it, but it certainly doesn't excuse it, but I'm not surprised someone in a relationship with him is kicking extras and getting them fired. Either she's lashing out because he's abusing her (still does not excuse her actions) or she's just like him and that's what drew them together. It's sad either way.
Being the child of celebrities is really a rough fate. Sure, you get to live a wealthy life, but everything your parents do is under a spotlight and cameras everywhere. You don't even get to enjoy privacy and will continue to hear about this sort of thing as you get older. And people just remind you about it. And etc...
FKA twigs is seriously one of the most talented and multifaceted artists I could think of and the fact that despite this she has done so much and still isn't as recognized as she should be is beyond criminal. This is so horrible to hear
I love her music and artistic genius soooo much, ive beenna day one fan. I'm glad to learn more details about what she went through, dangelo is right for calling attention to it!!! I hope she will have a lot of the public rallying behind her when the trail finally starts. Just want to give her a big hug :(
Thank you for making a vid about this… ive been a big fka twigs fan and always knew this story and told it to ppl who like shia , he’s an absolute monster who needs to face justice
People falling for Shia's fake "realness" in that Jon Berthal interview is disappointing but not surprising. FKA Twig is so brave, while he* is a coward and a monster. 💔
I love that you focused on her courage, not his pain. I feel like this could as easily been called 'Brave'. Thank you so much for giving folks a voice with your platform. So impressed by your unique flourish.
also, note in that interview that shia distances himself from the horrible things he did to twigs by referring to himself as "the man that was involved in that relationship." using the third person makes it seem like he's explaining that he's grown and is a better person now, he's not that awful man anymore--if, like d'angelo says, you're not listening.
I’m really grateful for FKA Twigs not giving up and for you D’Angelo, for giving more coverage of this. This is an exhausting thing to have to deal with. I have been in her shoes, been choked, held in a room, not aloud to see friends, threatened constantly with violence, been told I should be grateful I wasn’t getting treated worse. And always his behavior was my fault. I went to court for a restraining order and got lucky that the female judge could see right thru his act which was him desperately trying to redirect and control the courtroom narrative and infact even trying to claim he didn’t know where the home he owned for 10 years was on a map (!!?). I got lucky that I was listened to by this judge. I had called the cops twice before and they didn’t help at all. It’s not easy to stand up for yourself and pursue justice, keep going woman, you got this!!
thank you so much for speaking about this d'angelo. as a survivor, seeing stuff like this play out so publicly can be so triggering, esp when people doubt what you've been through. It means a lot that a male creator is using their platform for this so thank you so much.
I thought about it too. Male creators should push these stories about topics that a lot of woman experience. It's a great way to bring awareness of issues that are so complex and yet still, usually overlooked. Also, from an abused person to another abused person, I hope you're doing well now 💗
It's so crazy to me seeing how a man can get away with abuse just by admitting he is an abuser and saying, "Sorry." Pathetic doesn't even begin to describe the state of this situation
@@nari5161and it shouldn't be, it takes so many past youtubers ended up being a bad guys, for me to actually not put anyone especially male youtubers on a pedestal
@@nari5161 listen. We are in a world with constant attacks on our healthcare, sexually harassed every time we go outside, devalued by almost every man out there from politians to family members, treated like trash from internet commenters like you to the point where we wonder “ is it better to just be quiet?”, and hurt by our partners. So, I’ll take a man speaking out for women wherever i can. It’s pathetic that it has to be a UA-camr, but that is because men today are pathetic.
Your lighthearted videos are a lot of fun, but man oh man, it felt validating to hear someone else saying this online, and you handled the topic with outstanding empathy and intelligence. Thank you.
"Why didn't she leave?" She did. "Why didn't she call the cops?" SHE DID. I guess there's no credit to be had if she doesn't do it quick enough for the red pill bros (let's be honest - she could literally never leave fast enough for them to be satisfied). Thank you for covering this, D'Angelo. From someone who has experienced domestic violence, it means a lot to see a man with such a large platform cover this sensitive issue with such grace and compassion.
The fact that people were literally praising him like: HE is a real man, accepted his mistakes on camera. LIKE WTF. He ain't no real man! A real man would never hit a woman in the first place!
Ya know, i dated a guy for a couple years when we were both active alcoholics. We were terrible to each other at times. He wasn't abusive in this systematic sort of way but sometimes was physically abusive. Between 1-2 years after we broke up, he called and gave a very nice apology. He didn't blame his work or feelings or even alcohol (though i don't believe he'd do these things sober). He said basically that he was wrong and he did it and it should never happen. It was great. We haven't really talked since but we're both sober, ive heard he has a kid and at least from a distance, it seems hes changed. I fully believe he has or could. You have to admit your faults and its so sad these podcast fans have fallen for this false "accountability".
This! I really believe people can change, but change requires him to actually face what he did. If he was actually sorry, he would say it in court, it frustrating.
THANK YOU SO MUCH for LOUDLY advocating for survivors. This means the world to some of us who will never see justice. Fr thank you for calling Shia's bs out
![the [failed celebrity] to [trump supporter] pipeline is wild 🥴](/img/n.gif)
This weird cultural sentiment about certain men finally feeling empathy for women only after having a daughter needs to be examined and then exorcised.
THIS
Society infantalizes men. They're allowed to reach middle age without learning empathy or responsibility. They're allowed to develop disregulated emotions while claiming to be logical. They're encouraged to be self centered. The bar is deliberately set low. Why? Because society decided long ago that it was a good decision to pacify the physically stronger members for fear of being hurt. Also, not all men, before someone decides to respond with that.
Thank you. Even if they genuinely have that kind of awakening… keep it to yourself because you’re outing your past self. Yuck.
1000% yes. having conversations with men and them defending it has been so frustrating… i’ve expressed this exact sentiment and heard “well it’s better than not at all it’s a beautiful thing that they can learn it’s better than not at all” like yeah… sure but why do they deserve praise when it’s just breadcrumbing, bare minimum empathy. it should not take something coming from you to gain love and understanding for girls and women.
And then there’s the men who have daughters but can’t make the connection of treating women different/better
"That woman" "this woman" is very telling. The distancing language is disrespectful of Shia
Yea it reminds me of Chris Watts saying "those kids".
My cat is my baby and imagining myself saying "I love that cat so much" feels weird. I would say his name or "my cat".
It’s so telling, like that was your partner for nearly a year and now he’s speaking about her like she’s some crazed stalker
also him referring to himself as "that man" as he describes the awful things he's done in his past... sounds like he's still trying to deflect accountability in small ways
true, what a degrading way to address someone.
It’s depersonalization. Using her name shortens the emotional distance to her, which would make it harder to talk about and probably cause him to clam up entirely. He most likely doesn’t want to think about the things he did. No one wants to imagine themselves as a bad person, so when we know we’ve done bad things, or things we perceive as bad, we often try to deny them or find a target we can place the blame on.
Having a daughter isn't where empathy for women begins. Saying a toxic man should have a daughter and then it will change him perpetuates the "woman must fix a man" and people are making that woman "fixing/changing toxic behavior in a man" a daughter. Men are responsible for the things they do, good and bad, not women.
Being the daughter that "changed" the abusive man, it was the most terrifying heartbreaking experience finding out as an adult how evil my favourite person was prior to my birth and the evil things that kept happening behind my back my entire life
can't believe the smartest man in this comment section has a South Park pfp
@@ornamentalhermit333 You just made me laugh my ass off! It's my own dad's South Park creation. My brother & I haven't ever changed it lol
Exactly! He's holding a literal baby responsible for if he makes any more of these terrible choises.
there's also zero guarantee that they will actually change, regardless of whether or not they think they will/have. wishing a daughter upon a man with a history of abusing women feels like dooming an innocent child to the very real possibility of abuse.
Also important to note on that interview, he said "that man" who abused her. He's distancing himself from the acts he perpetrated. Ugh I hate it, I hate it all
and the dismissive way he referred to fka twigs as "that woman"... he doesn't see her, or any of the other women who came forward, as deserving respect
@@Norcat10Rage bait used to be believeable 😐
@@Norcat10congrats do you want us to clap
@@Norcat10congrats, want a lollipop?
He’s using the Shame Dawson technique for deflecting blame
Instead of asking: "Why didn't you leave?", why not ask the abuser why they treat the person they claimed to love like trash?
I think both can be valid question to ask. I wish we empowered more woman to leave situations. As someone who grew up in a household where my father was abusive to both my mother and us children, at some point, I realised that I couldn't rely on my mother either. She complained about him but also made excuses for him. I've always felt, why don't you do something about it because us children growing up were completely powerless.
@@arnitaxavier9446 Yeah… because while you are abused by them, you are also made responsible for their feelings and behaviour. Truly devious
But also, leave. Id rather sleep on a sidewalk than be in a home while im being abused
@autumwho I'm sure you understand it's not that simple. Sure, NOW you say that you would leave immediately, that you wouldn't "put up" with that, but this is something you truly have no idea how you will react in that situation if put in it. More scrutiny should 100% be put on the abuser
Why not both though? Because I just mentally also can't get my brain to understand why she didn't leave. I don't mean it as a gotcha or to put her down, I just actually genuinely do not understand why she didn't leave.
I hope you saw that FKA Twigs shared your video and thanked you 💜 This video is so respectfully done.
As a formerly abused woman, I’m sure she balled her eyes out watching this.
I’m so glad she saw it and had some much needed public validation. 🥹
Can we please also not forget that Shia also abused tf out of Sia. She has wrote songs about that abuse she has faced from him. This is not an isolated incident.
Wow 😭😭😭 I’ve been fiercely advocating for D’Angelo’s content ever since ppl on Twitter claim the second channel is “lazy” and “for clicks.” This second channel informs ppl about important societal issues, and by offering his perspective, I think it teaches ppl empathy and understanding. I just went to FKA twigs’ Insta to like the story updates to show my support - this is what I want to see online, pure compassion 🫂
what did she say?
@@animenome308one of those songs wouldn’t happen to be waving goodbye would it? I
Shia depersonalizes Twigs, calling her "this woman" repeatedly in the interview people praise him for. Abuser 101 behaviour. There is an all too typically low bar for redemption for these abusers.
Agreed! Plus He is still being abusive tbh.
@@Norcat10yikes
@@Norcat10 you're the problem
It also protects him from legal consequences, because "that woman" could refer to multiple people.
I never heard anyone refer to exes by their name in podcasts... stay on topic.
People always pull the whole "why didn't you leave?" crap as if leaving automatically means safe. There are women who were still killed by their abuser even after leaving.
Literally!!! W t f???💀 Vic tims are mur der ed when they leave! The FBI needs to help women in situations like these. Ab u se needs to be seen as a federal te rro ri za tion offense, but it’s not🤦♀️😞
This is horribly true, and like. It is a deeply horrible thing, that so many people would rather mourn a poor martyred victim who followed their advice and was lost to it, than *listen to them or reach out and hold their @bu$er accountable before that happens*
Some are even killed BECAUSE they left.
Seriously, thank you for making this point.
I know, but the chase makes it all the more fun 😍
D’Angelo!!! I just saw twigs mention you and this video on her story!!! She applauded this video for the accuracy!!! So cool to see you grow and be acknowledged by others for your hard work
I saw this too and went to the video because of her repost! It's really lovely you were able to explain her situation with Shia with respect and justice.
The way he admitted it! And still has a career is SO sickening.
simps gonna simp
Also still has supporters and fans
Agreed. It absolutely makes no sense
Many such cases, unfortunately
He's a White dude, she's a woman of color, no surprise there.
“It’s not about me… I could’ve been anyone.” Wow. That hit me like a ton of bricks. I needed to hear that.
me too, that part hit hard.
Hope you are doing ok
And the f*cked up thing about it is that you can even be consciously aware of that fact, but it's an entirely different beast to make yourself _feel_ it's true. I hope there are happy days in your future, no matter your situation.
P.S. Don't get married, kids.
@Narangarath marriage is not the problem lol that's crazy, abusive and toxic people are the problem.
Yeah. I personally understood that when after months of incessant stalking after running away it started to be quiet after they’ve found the next victim. I was unlucky to meet them, as the ones before, as the next ones, but it could’ve been anyone else, it just happened to be me in that moment with that specific person and situation. It kinda helps realizing it, even if it’s depressing knowing how many are and have been in the same situations and worse.
Reeks of "Look what you made me do" and unfortunately, I gotta tap out due to personal triggers, but thank you so much for making this
You called it 100%, he basically says exactly that later in the vid
He says those exact words ON TAPE. Complete POS
Same. But I do appreciate the effort they made to make the video and get this stuff out there
I hope you keep healing and growing on your journey lady❤
It's crazy how admitting you abused someone immediately means you're forgiven because the WAY people were SO quick to move on from what Shia had done was sickening. I hope Twigs gets her justice!!!
It makes me think that those people are either abusers themselves or have a tendency to abuse people or it’s someone who’s never experienced abuse.
@@dylangriffin5514Its that, and also that the bar for men, especially cishet white men with money and power, is so far in the pits of hell that they get applauded for basic emotional awareness that we teach toddlers
Women's suffering doesn't matter for them, that's it, it's men they're the protagonists, it's their journey their growth their complexity so they get applauded for the bare minimum
Because she’s black
The ppl forgiving him are either ppl who e never been abused an survived it, or people who are perps of abuse themselves and feel like it’s their place to accept shias bullshit apologies
More evidence that these men don't really get cancelled unless they're literally in prison.
I don't know... I was watching a video today where they were interviewing minority folks (black people, gay people etc etc) Trump supporters and a woman said "free R Kelly!" so even he is not completely cancelled which is horrifying.
Even then they're praised (wade Wilson for example)
That's because the bar is in Hell for men. If a woman did all that, she'd never have a career again
Not even then sometimes 😭
Not even prison cancels everyone. Tory Lanez still has his idiot stans.
what she said about not being special to your abuser as an abuse victim is so incredibly true. i remember how bizarre it felt when i found out my abuser had already found someone else she treated the exact same way she treated me just a few years after i finally ditched her. i felt a deep sense of empathy for that girl who was now constantly hanging around my abuser, looking like she truly didn't want to be there. as far as i am aware, she's no longer in contact with her. i hope that to be true. i already knew i'd been a replaceable victim to my abuser by then, it was just a whole different experience actually seeing it happening before me in person.
thank you for covering this.
was gonna comment the same damn thing. it was a very particular punch to the gut to finally realize i could have been anyone; i was a means to an end, not a person with autonomy in a partnership. tough pill to swallow for sure, and rarely something people speak out on. massive respect to her for bringing it up, and massive respect to you for continuing the conversation. i hope you've gotten your peace since leaving.
This is something that still sticks with me years later. I remember the very moment I realized and I said “I’m not special to you, you would do this with anyone” and he said “yeah,” like it was obvious.
That pain is great, I hope time brings us all healing
finally someone with a large platform is talking about this without bias towards Shai. He literally admitted it. The abuser and abused both claim abuse and for some reason the general public still has this idea that she's using him... Disappointing. I am so happy you made this. Thank you
Honestly I would be surprised if D'Angelo Wallace would not talk about something like this. On such serious issues. And yes it's good that someone with a wide range of audience is talking about this.
Even if she fucking left…..what? Don’t call him out? People just hate women bro. They are sexually attracted to them, but they hate them.
A lot of men literally don't even like women, they want sex and nothing else
perfectly said
Definitely
There's a certain type of man who says "I love women" when it's obvious that what they really mean is that they love having sex with them, not having actual relationships with them.
Truth
His use of the words "cold sores" instead of "Herpes" is incredibly disgusting. Everything about shia labeouf is deceitful as he seeks to downplay every aspect of his abuse. What a terrible person. I feel sorry for his daughter.
I was gonna say. Herpes can in fact break out on more intimate parts of the body instead of just the lips 💀 I feel sick to my stomach hearing him talk about that.
Yea I had to take a double take on that. Like “what does a dental hygiene issue have to do with anythi… oh he’s talking about Herpes.”
My guess is that he went down on her while knowing he had a cold sore and transmitted the herpes to her genitals.
Yes, but also know that 70% of the population has hsv1, which causes cold sores...and most people have no idea. Abt 14% of ppl have HSV2 and only 10-20% of people know....but him knowing and not telling isn't right...but you probably have herpes and and don't know.
I haven’t gotten to that part of the video… As an HSV1 haver, I was raised to call them cold sores, raised to not understand the complexity of the virus. It was definitely a part of my journey coming to terms with it and learning about how disclosure works in new relationships
nobody did anything when my ex attacked me in the street in broad daylight except one elderly lady who phoned the police. i totally believe her.
As someone who has had her husband almost kill her and currently going through the legal process of pressing charges and possibly suing. The fact that abusers cant admit what they did and then have enablers around them, we never EVER get justice. Then we get villainized. It is NEVER fair
sending you lots of love and support, i hope you are safe and doing well
It is disgusting how ready to forgive abusers we are if they shed a single tear - or even say one vague sentence about it :(
also wanted to say that you are not alone in what you have experienced, I am so glad you survived and I wish you all the best not only with the legal process but also in healing
Bless you ((Hugs))
Average straight couple
I’m so sorry, hun. Wishing you all the healing and justice you deserve 💚💚💚💚
Great work here. Thanks for including our episode and social clips with twigs in your analysis of this. We're so glad we could help to support her, and so many other survivors, in this moment.
do better
I hope “that woman” finally gets her justice because… what??
ME TOO!
nice pfp! let's all love lain!!
@@cerbie6781 lets all love lain
lets all love lain
lets all love lain
lets all love lain
lets all love lain
She won't. Cuz he's white.
@@cerbie6781 love the misa pfp tho
A lot of abusers are like that, "I'll only take responsibility if I can say that I'm also a victim". Reminds me of Diddy's apology, "There were hard times in my life." "I'm making steps to change"
It's also the people that protect the abusers too. Like Jon Bernthal tried to excuse away Roman Polaski brutally r-wording a 13 year old girl because "he'd gone through a lot in his younger years and it did some thing to him." Exactly the same excuse he used to hand wave away Shia's abuse. Makes me sick.
@@Bunn.B People like to say Hurt people, hurt people, but there are millions of people who were hurt in their childhood who chose to work on themselves and be better, so it's a poor excuse anyways.
Diddys non-apology.
@the_crypter
The problem with being a hurt person is that it how u deal with it can be a dice roll. Best thing to do is to just not hurt people.
or Drake Bell
I worked with a woman who told me her husband gave her HSV, knowing he had it, and their newborn child was diagnosed with neonatal herpes. Which can result in blindness, seizures, and other serious consequences. The fact this man was not telling his partners that he had cold sores, and then a partner had a child, is seriously seriously fucked. There is no shame in having an STI and even things that can't be cured can be treated and controlled. However there is no forgiveness for putting someone else and a baby at risk like that.
This is not victim blaming at all, but a warning and a lesson: *WE MUST BE OUR OWN HEALTH ADVOCATE.*
There is no reason to take your partner’s word over LAB RESULTS.
We cannot assume, even in MARRIAGE, that your partner or spouse will have your best interest in mind.
Get tested NO MATTER WHAT.
Yeah, I think as just going to point this out! God, that poor child. He’s definitely going to abuse her.
@@galaxylucia1898unfortunately HSV doesn't usually show up on a standard blood panel- it generally relies on the presence of active sores to diagnose. So if the person doesn't disclose it or it's not visible at the time (which is most of the time), you are unlikely to know
Yes, but also know that 70% of the population has hsv1, which causes cold sores...and most people have no idea. Abt 14% of ppl have HSV2 and only 10-20% of people know....but him knowing and not telling isn't right...but you probably have herpes and don't know.....but you should be telling your partner if you do know still..and be doing everything to protect your child at a vulnerable age. That being said, you probably have herpes too.
@@galaxylucia1898 Yes, but also know that 70% of the population has hsv1, which causes cold sores...and most people have no idea. Abt 14% of ppl have HSV2 and only 10-20% of people know....but him knowing and not telling isn't right...but you probably have herpes and don't know.....but you should be telling your partner if you do know still..and be doing everything to protect your child at a vulnerable age. That being said, you probably have herpes too.
Thank you for this video. My abuser was finally indicted by a grand jury and charged last week and unfortunately all of his fans are now coming after me. It’s exactly like you said, people tend to believe the accused over the victim. It’s so horrible. This video is a great reminder that there are still decent humans who believe women.
🎉 congrats on the asshole being indicted! I'm so sorry you had to go through that. I'm at least very happy you got your day in court. I get it... similar situation happened to me, except my ex was in the same college and I ended up losing every friend... please don't let the changes and what people say bring you down. At the end of the day YOU know the truth and they have no right to say who should be affected by what, when, how...And take your time healing. It's gonna be hard, but you'll get there. I wish you peace, healing, and love ♡ ps- if you're ever anxious, purple noise is lovely.
@@kittym.h.1926Thank you so much for your kind and supportive message. I’m so sorry you went through something similar and I’m proud of you for telling the truth even if it meant losing people you thought were your friends. I hope you know you deserve SO much better than how you were treated ❤ sending you hugs 🫂
I am SO freakin proud of you!! You are so much braver and stronger than you think you are!! You are so amazing!! Bless your heart! I only ended up getting away from my abusive partner after almost 10 years because he passed away, which has led to it's own problems. I hope you're able to find the peace and happiness you deserve because you do deserve it sweetheart!
I hope you're okay and safe. Please don't let them get to you, they're all naive idiots for choosing to believe an abuser over the victim. You're the only one here whose feelings matter.
Wow you are so brave. 😭 I never brought my abuser to justice. DO IT GIRL! For you, and for all of us!!!!!!
as someone with a deep love for fka Twigs since LP1 it is depressing to see the misogynoir running through headlines that treat her as if she's some nobody…she's a fucking legend in the experimental pop world and (like every other victim on Earth) never deserved to go through what she did. thank you for covering this 💜
hell, I'm barely cognizant of modern day music/artists and even I've heard of her
What songs of hers would you recommend? I mostly listen to a lot of industrial and grunge music but she sounds cool and I’d like to give her music a listen.
She deserves better 💔
Try the two newest ones, just crank your headphones super loud and enjoy the ride @@tortis6342
@@tortis6342 try tears in the club with the weekend and jealousy with Rema for a start. They’re more pop based but good songs imo.
Brb crying bc twigs saw this and I'm outraged and so happy you helped her be seen. My love for you and your content, even since you began, is boundless.
Women in abusive relationships are often told that if they leave it means they're cruel or disloyal or not trying hard enough to make things work all the way up until they actually do leave, at which point they're then told they're stupid for not leaving sooner and letting it happen to them. Sometimes they'll continue to be accused of both for the rest of their lives. There's just no winning.
@@Norcat10 nope. I’m gonna judge.
“a hard time” is never a fkn excuse. Maybe try reading what you said out loud, so you can hear how ridiculous it is.
@@Norcat10 We absolutely can and should judge abusers. There's reasons that influence people to be in a bad place, but that doesn't excuse their behavior. Being hurt doesn't give you the freedom to hurt other people.
Also, leaving poses a huge danger for victims, statistically it's the most dangerous time of an abusive relationship.
@@meeomelovescookiesandhisto459 second that…leaving can be dangerous and it’s why you need to have a plan. She did mention how he was threaten to crash the car if she didn’t say “I love you”….thats a prime example of the shit victims deal with 😢😢
@meeomelovescookiesandhisto459 as someone who almost died leaving hers I attest to that
That woman commenting on Shia's "change" on the pod and using it to justify her abuse was CHILLING. 12k likes. oh my god.
LMAO editing resets ur likes beuh
@@Chloceani think they were saying that the comment on the podcast episode had 12k likes
@@Chlocean the woman's comment had 12k likes
1.2k you forgot the decimal
@@leporiaanticwhat woman? What are you referring to?
Twigs just shared this thank you D'Angelo for all the work you do
The fact that abuser's suffering is more relatable to the general public than victim's is terrifying
Exactly. Is disgusting how the public think Shia changed just because he cried a bit in a podcast while they ignore FKA is disgusting.
Only when it's a male, like amber heard was indeed abused but she added some lies and people have no empathy for her and they do for shia and many other men
this. ty
@@zizojaezekeom3565 this a thousand times
That’s one of the rules of misogyny, anything males go through is worse than what females experience.
I got forced to have a baby at 16 by my abusive older boyfriend. He then tried to kill me a few months after she was born. I literally felt like I couldn’t leave there was no way, until I realized he actually wanted to kill me and he tortured me for hours. I wish I left earlier. Anyone in an abusive situation please leave
❤❤❤❤
I hope you're doing okay❤ just know that none of that will EVER be your fault
I’m so sorry this happened but I’m glad ur out ❤❤
I'm so glad u got away fam, it took a lot of courage & strength to leave but u DID IT and that's something worth being proud of. Good for u!! Heck yeah!!
I am so grateful you are still here with us. Sending you so much love ❤
My abuser denies everything, refuses to take a accountability, even though there are court findings of his abuse and criminality. These guys really think they can terrorize you in private but put on a mask around others to get what they want. They say all the right things, but their actions NEVER match up. Scary type of person
I AM SO GLAD THAT D’Angelo is PUTTING MORE OF A SPOTLIGHT ON TJIS. It has given me whiplash seeing people make excuses for Shia. FKA has been through so much. She is so brave, talented, and incredible for her resilience.
@@Norcat10 and you talk too much shush
Her talent has nothing to do with any of this. No person deserves this, regardless of their talent. But it seems to me the only time there's outrage around this is when you have someone talented being treated inhumane.
@@Kouvierl_Elliyse 🤡🤡🤡
@@Kouvierl_Elliyse 🤡🤡🤡
Anytime someone asks a victim why it disgusts me
but why tho? Shia aaand Elon?! make it make sense.
i think it’s just hard for a lot of people to wrap their heads around how disorienting abuse is. i didn’t get it until i was abused. it’s like how people watch horror movies and say “i would just kick him!” like, would you?? it’s hard to imagine being in that state of primal fear. you can talk all you want about what the logical course of action is, but even if it really IS as black and white as you think, it’s so hard to see that when you’re in the thick of it.
I'm confused why people ask the victims why instead of the abusers. Its almost like people act like abusers don't have autonomy. They made the choice to abuse someone.
@@obanjespirit2895 It doesn't make sense. That’s what abuse does to a person. It warps the way you see the world and the people around you, to the point where you make decisions an outsider can't understand. Someone who hasn't experienced abuse can't understand what it's like to be broken down as a person to that extent.
Agreed
I had a feeling she’d see this. D’Angelos videos have a history of making a real difference in public opinion…just checked, and FKA twigs posted clips from this video to her insta ❤
What's crazy is just last week I had to call the cops on a neighbor that had his gf trapped in a car, yelling "these windows aren't gonna save you!". No one was doing anything. Even tho everyone who was home could hear it. I am in a bad neighborhood, rife with meth, but man... It's not easy to call, so at the same time, I understand it. I had to make a written statement, but I'm terrified of the neighbor because I'm a woman that lives by myself, so I can't be seen making the report (even by any neighbors, they all hang out with each other), so I had to go meet the cops down the road. I have PTSD from abuse, so driving there was difficult from being shook up from what I was just subjected to be around. BUT I'm still glad I did it. No one else was going to. Always say something.
As a woman whose been in that situation before when no one did anything, thankyou ❤❤
Thank you
it's scary (esp being someone other than a cis man) to be the person to report, it makes you feel exposed and vulnerable, esp if you've been the victim of abuse yourself. what you did what very courageous and i hope you give yourself space and time to heal from that traumatizing experience.
Bless you, you are courageous and I hope you have nothing but better days ahead!
you’re a better person than most. hold onto that. and thank you.
Wild to think that Olivia Wilde, who knew all this information about Shia, still begged this man to be in her movie warning about the dangers of men being in too much control of their wives 😬
I mean it does sound like it was almost written to him.
If it was written with him in mind, whether to drag him or not, I’m so, SO glad he didn’t end up in the part because he’d be getting PAID to be a piece of sh*t. It’s like what Jordan Teresa pointed out in her Substance video, it’s not the serve you think it is to cast a horrible man in a horrible role - they collect a check!!!
@@atlantictigerwho is the horrible man in the substance?
@@any8574 dennis quaid i believe
@@any8574 my guess would be dennis quaid lol
I'm so proud of you. To have FKA herself not only repost but genuinely share how grateful she was for an accurate and empathetic telling of her story. Wow! You really helped her feel understood and by proxy SO MANY OTHERS. Go off king!
"it's not about me- It's about food- I'm just supply- I could've been anyone" - The combination of disappointment that we were never special to this person we loved- while also the liberation in realizing the abuse wasn't our fault, there was nothing we could change about ourselves to please this person- it's their problem-- It's so true
Why did Mia Goth stay with him? I think she’s just as bad. She’s probably a pedophile.
She just wants to use Shia’s fame to boost her failing music career. Every fka twigs album so far has charted lower than the last. She’s a flop and this is her way of desperately trying to remain relevant 😂
She’s just trying to save her failing music career. Caprisongs was the lowest charting album of her career. She’s a flop 😂
i love the way you worded this, ty
@@BigOwl51 Even if she had nothing else going on and had no creative accomplishments, that doesn't excuse Shia's horrific, violent treatment of her. Very sad and twisted perspective that you have! Hope you keep it to yourself next time.
When I came across that clip from the podcast and she said “they all operate the same… I realized I wasn’t special I was just supply” I broke down crying. That’s really how it feels. Not only was the entire relationship a lie but that person never truly loved ME
Omg babe that’s so true 🤯🤯🤯
The end of that comment was everything ❤❤
it makes me sad even thinking about it briefly. the fact that not only did they not love or want me, but they didn’t even want to abuse ME specifically. i was just what was available. i know it’s kind of fucked up to think but. i wish i was something to them
@@evanestewart7665 1000%. Ten years, my entire twenties. A total waste of life. Such a shame. Unquantifiable losses.
@@Ladyfingers-333 I am so sorry. I don’t know how to deal with the loss, how to reconcile with the fact that I was never special to them. I’m not strong enough . The grief is so overwhelming. I feel like I can’t love myself to the point where I’m okay again, but no one else is coming and I have to stop looking for someone else to save me. It’s just so fucking hard to love yourself when you feel like you do it simply because no one else will.
So much loss. I also feel like I’ve lost so many things, more than the years but the innocence. The openness to love and the openness towards other people, the unguarded-ness, the trust I had and hope I had that love was finally coming for me. I feel like I’ll never get that innocence back and I mourn it every day.
Love to you and everyone who went through this. I would never wish this position on absolutely anybody .
It’s so important that you talk about these subjects even more than the light hearted topics. Thank you for talking about this
This topic hits too close to home for me so I won’t be watching but thanks D’Angelo for putting your time into this to share these survivors stories ❤️
100% same
I hope you both are doing better 🫂
I really want to support him and I do, hopefully this engagement can make up for us politely bowing out
I'll watch this video 4 times. Once for each of us
Me too, I’ll have to skip it as well
Her line about "it's not about you, you're just food" for the abuser really hit home. That's... yeah. I'm at a loss for words right now because of how true that is and how it's putting a whole new light on the abusive relationship I was in many years ago. I'm going to be thinking about that for a while.
11:07 i literally burst into tears at this, my abusive ex used to talk to me so similarly its honestly eerie
twigs deserved so much better and the fact that the media constantly ignores her and gives shia chance after chance is INFURIATING
Caine, the trial being pushed is a plot to create lasting PTSD on her and it is giving elaborate r-acism .
Thank you for covering this and standing by Twigs. I feel like women are always told to “just leave it alone” or “not ruffle feathers” and it is so helpful to hear someone back up not only her but anyone else who chooses to stand up for themselves
Calling FKA Twigs “this woman” in the podcast was the first sign that this effort at accountability was bullshit
I see a lot of people commenting on this, but on one hand is he gonna call her “FKA Twigs” (her full stage name) in such a serious moment? You can’t really shorten it to FKA or Twigs, and also using a stage name feels inappropriate when talking about such a serious topic. But also using her real name on a public platform feels like a violation as well? I think his use of “that man” is much more damning imo.
Shia even has admitted to doing a lot of these abuses and so it's wild that he keeps trying to push back the court date. Like, man up!
If he was capable of "manning up" he wouldn't be abusive.
expecting a guy to act in a way that isn't in their immediate best interest is so foreign and unrealistic
@@frankreads8618Exactly.
@nari5161 don't think it's in his "long term interest" either... he has opened up about being abusive, that's not a crime. When he he admits being abusive towards a specific person, them we're talking
I don't think he said those things as a real admission of guilt. He was, in my opinion, trying to see how much he could get away with. A lot of narcissistic abusers feel compelled to brag about their abuse as if it's an achievement, and being able to talk about it on a huge public platform and get away with little to no repercussions is a huge ego boost and source of satisfaction for them.
I hate the victim blaming that happens when a man decides to be abusive. Absolutely vile! I hope FKA Twigs is healing from her trauma.
Was so touched to see Twigs shared your video on her Insta ❤
D'Angelo - Thank you for jumping straight into this topic without the intro. Immensely appreciate your efforts in reporting on and relaying nuanced topics such as this with such care xx
i hope mia goth is safe
the fact that she has a child with him…i just really hope they’re both safe
i’m happy to see more comments like this that support her instead of demonizing her for being with such a man. ❤️
@@ivzypetthat's what I was worried about seeing too! I'm glad it seems like most people realize she could be in just as bad and confusing a situation as FKA was.
I don't think Mia has to worry, sounds like she's a bit of a scrapper too. She did get sued for assault after all. She might be the perfect one to put Shia in his place.
@@Hiiiiiiiiieeee that just sounds like grounds for more trauma bonding to me but ok
Thank you for making this video. This comes at a time when I’m currently in the middle of separating from a DV situation. And it feels like I am being seen and spoken to. Abuse is spirit breaking, but seeing how many people can actually see past the abuser’s bs makes me feel that the world is better than I think.
Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
the degree this man and his lawyers have gone to belittle and demonize her makes my fucking blood boil. the amount of cases I see like this and yet the victims still lose in the end, I seriously hope that someday the world will take these people seriously, because I don't want another person to die because no one listened to their pleas for help.
When I left my relationship after the worst assault and was looking into legal options, I read a case about a woman whose partner landed her in the hospital and judge and jury ruled "you can't prove she didn't want that"
@@nari5161💀💀💀💀
@@nari5161 truly disgusting... I hope you and that lady on that case filed is doing well now
I don't understand how people still like him.
Same 🤦🏾♀️
He’s a narcissistic emotional black hole thats detrimental to anyone that comes in contact with him, leaving them for the worse after his wake. I watched the entire podcast when it came out, but it made me view John B differently as he never challenged Shia’s lack of accountability and it was the “boohoo Shia show”. JB just nodded open mouthed most of the time.
I have no clue why anyone platforms this human trashcan, or why he’s allowed to orbit celebrities that have influence especially with kids and YA. He’s had so many ppl want help him, but he refuses said help, thinking an admission of weakness.
definitely frustrating. he doesn't deserve admiration. lying and hurting others while people champion this idea that he's taken accountability because he carefully chose his words... gross.
@@borkingsnark He’s a narcissistic emotional black hole thats detrimental to anyone that comes in contact with him, leaving them for the worse after his wake. I watched the entire podcast when it came out, but it made me view John B differently as he never challenged Shia’s lack of accountability and it was the “boohoo Shia show”. JB just nodded open mouthed most of the time.
I have no clue why anyone platforms this human trashcan, or why he’s allowed to orbit celebrities that have influence especially with kids and YA. He’s had so many ppl want help him, but he refuses said help, thinking an admission of weakness.
One reason is because he's been lying about the allegations left and right. Another is probably misogyny
Twigs shared this video on her IG!! It would be incredible if this helps her case, you really do create some of the best videos!!
Didn't she also experience racism from Patterson's family? Can't this poor woman catch a break?
Not only his parents, but his fans as well! The Twilight fans were absolutely ruthless towards her.
Yes, ruthless misogynoir
I only knew about the fan's racism! Not his family too! 😮
It’s what the song cellophane is about, which then turned into a huge meme
@@deeksha611I will literally never forgive the internet for making Cellophane a meme with that annoying version of Miss Piggy. Like can she catch a break?!
I highly recommend listening to FKA Twigs interview with Louis Theroux on his podcast back in 2020 if you want to know more about her life story. Her art, her childhood, and she also speaks a bit about her experience with Shia Leboeuf. She seems like such a beautiful soul. Wishing her all the best ❤
tysm! i love me some Louis Theroux and had no idea they worked together. 😊
Thanks
No we don't want to know more about her
@EvanescenceEverythingOh shut up.
Thank you for doing this video. I just reported my childhood abuser and all people have said to me is "you're ruining his life". Like what about the 7 yr old girls life he decided to ruin?
No, he ruined his own life by doing what he did, as well as trying to ruin the life of a literal child. I HATE it when people say this and I'm sorry people are saying this to you.
Didn't realized Mia Goth married Shia and they even had a kid together. This is really sad. I hope her and her daughter are okay. People who are so abusive like Shia are all about taking power away from people and formatting them to be how they want, I don't see a world where he won't be pulling that kind of shit with his child either.
I really hope Twigs and any person that Shia abused will get justice and healing. I've been a fan of Twigs for a while and she's an amazing artist and seem like an amazing person too. She's been inspiring in more ways than one and I hope she wins this one. I'm sick of seeing disgusting men like Shia get away with heinous shit because the justice system is so broken.
Him saying how he was competitive and comparing himself to other people actually made something made sense. When I was in an abusive relationship I couldn't understand why he wanted everyone to hate me. Don't you want your friends to like your partner? He would try to turn people against me but they would see how horrible he was to me and called him out. That made him really mad and accused me of turning people against him.
That is such a good point, my abusive ex was very competitive too. It makes sense that for a narcissistic competitive abuser, the victims are treated as disposable accessories to boost the abusers image
@@Stressymessy
That's not competition. Siblings and athletes are competitive. Thats vengeance. What's happening, *most likely,* is he's tryna make u "pay" for some "transgression" against him from way before u met each other.
My dad set me up financially in life so I was completely financially dependant on him (a car he bought for me in HIS name etc, a fuel card in HIS name, an apartment he bought for me to let me stay FREE) I though he was the most generous man on earth. Around age 25 I started doing self development and finding my self confidence. I started to become aware of how toxic and draining his energy was to me. When I started practicing a healthy expression of personal boundaries, thats when I first saw his mentally abusive and intimidating side. Its impossible to be an empowered person in an co-dependant relationship. If you are healthy and practicing self love, they are angry and violent towards you, they sense that cant have emotional control over you. If you are insecure, low vibration and submissive, they train you to think you are doing very well in life, but when you feel lower than them, you don't notice their evil.
As a woman who suffered abuse, I don't believe him for a split second. LaBeouf is disgusting and needs serious jail time. He's a danger to everyone around him.
These poor women deserve so much support.
This is what pisses me off with predators like Shia and diddy. These men deserve jail and not grace or sympathy. The amount of sympathy that people have for these disgusting human beings angers me. If you excuse this behavior what else would you excuse?
i feel for mia ugh
I hope she wins, and I hope that she is able to drown out the hate, and simply live her life. I hope she finds a relationship that is truly loving and respectful. Nobody should have to go through that kind of manipulation.
D'angelo, Tahliah watched your video!! So so proud of you! Thank you for this! 🙏🏽👏🏽
When this man says pathetic. You know it's serious
How dare these victims of domestic abuse be victims of domestic abuse! Why, if I were a person who was constantly being destroyed to the point I had no self-worth, no self-esteem, and possibly little to no physical health I would obviously also be a person who valued myself enough to save up enough money to move where my abuser couldn't find me (because my abuser also let me have a job and financial independence) and if we had kids I would just take them because the legal system is totally cool with that and if the abuser told me constantly that they'd kill me and they could get away with it and proved that point by not being punished at all by the system when I called the cops, I would just leave.
How dare these people have children with abusers and then have to struggle even more because now they have another HUMAN BEING (who they feel responsible for) that is weaponized against them. They should have just left. I certainly would have just left. It's definitely not like I'm saying the same thing as their abuser - that if the kid is hurt, it is obviously their own stupid fault and they should just be better.
fr I really hate this stupid rhetoric. the world sucks so incredibly much
I love your proficiency in sarcasm 👏🏼👏🏼
The thing is that the people who really think like this just believe they would never get to the point of feeling like they had no self worth or self esteem. In their minds it's a character flaw and personal failing to be susceptible to those things, like they're something that the abused person could have, _should_ have, prevented. The fact that they don't leave their abuser as soon as the first sign shows is a failure in courage. The fact that they don't see the very first signs that something might be wrong as soon as they occur is their own failure in diligence. The rationalizations go on and on ad nauseam.
@@Avendesora Just to clarify, you are saying that this is incorrect thinking right? Like, it's not actually a failure of courage but a terrible result of consistent and intense abuse.
Thank you for adding your truthful and empathic voice to this “dialogue” which seems like a monologue a lot of the time.
FKA Twigs is way above and beyond that mf✨🖤✨🦋🕊️
❤❤❤
They're incomparable. One is a nasty abusing narcissist and one has a legacy - critically acclaimed singer, songwriter, actor, dancer, model, director she's the real deal and can do everything and i mean *EVERYTHING*. She deserves Shia's level of fame and 100X more.
@ I love you girl, you know what’s uppp! Magdalene was the soundtrack of my life for years, she literally went through so much and she’s the most committed artist to her craft honestly 🤍 these people are missing out on her art.
I’m a physician and it was incredibly difficult to leave an abusive marriage. They slowly grind down your confidence until it is dust. Death by a thousand small insults. They start out as perfect and your dream person, and they find ways to blame you when they start acting cruel. It’s amazing. Everyone should read “Why Does He Do That” by Lundy, it will open your eyes to abuse, helped me leave my abusive marriage.
One of my favourite book. Everyone should read it”Why does he do that”! For me it was an abusive family member.
I’ve followed twigs since 2014. She’s said time and time again that she’s not a fan of the spotlight (e.g., Video Girl). The courage that she’s shown is awe inspiring. Her work with advocacy groups for women that have been abused is amazing. I’m so proud of her for speaking out
I mean, we literally live in a world where someone can stand up in front of a stadium full of people and say "I'm a bad person" or "I'm a racist" or "I'm a fascist" and people will still follow them. I don't understand what happened to us.
Or maybe this is just the internet exposing what was broken in us all along. Idk
exactly: remember we are just NOW at a time where people are openly and vehemently against child labor as its inherently exploitative. people like to say we are worse now more than ever when in reality good people are given much more of a louder voice than ever while the exploitative systems that have been normalized are finally being heavily criticized.
@@breathoffreshair7795this is such a hopeful take, thank you
@plushdragonteddy Sometimes we need those hopeful takes. ❤
@@breathoffreshair7795 Username checks out ♥
As a victim of both childhood and adult abuse, abusers having children is always the worst part to me.
A fear of mine is that my ex is going to have a baby anyday. I thank my lucky stars I didn’t. Poor Mia with Shias baby. She will be trapped for a very long time. The poor baby. Awful.
Agreed!
I saw that twigs promoted this on her instagram, props to you for getting her story out so eloquently!!!
Justice delayed is justice denied 😢
My heart goes to my fave twigs and I hope she can receive some sort of justice and her abuser can be held accountable. There's so many simultaneous abuser stories in the headlines right now (this, Diddy, Tory, Chris Brown) that I really pray for every victim and extend compassion to everyone involved. Believe survivors 💜
"um....i'm slightly sorry....but it's NOT my fault because i had addiction problems....but like i was a bad person only because uhhh....only because i did. a drug and an alcohol. I HAVE A DAUGHTER"
wow. stunning accountability
10:05 That was the BEST straightforward answer to this question I’ve ever heard. As someone who suffered from the pattern of abuse from multiple partners starting at the age of 16 (& finally ending in my late twenties), thank you.
i feel so bad for mia goth honestly, i feel like she was groomed into being ok with his insanity and with how abusive he is even towards her, and the fact that they have a kid together is just even worse
I know fr I hope she and the kid can escape.
I don't know if it explains it, but it certainly doesn't excuse it, but I'm not surprised someone in a relationship with him is kicking extras and getting them fired. Either she's lashing out because he's abusing her (still does not excuse her actions) or she's just like him and that's what drew them together. It's sad either way.
Being the child of celebrities is really a rough fate. Sure, you get to live a wealthy life, but everything your parents do is under a spotlight and cameras everywhere. You don't even get to enjoy privacy and will continue to hear about this sort of thing as you get older. And people just remind you about it. And etc...
@@BriarPatchNyra they're straights that's why. Practically in their blood to be horrible no matter if they've suffered or not.
@@BriarPatchNyra this isn't proven and was claimed by a man who has repeatedly lied in court btw
FKA twigs is seriously one of the most talented and multifaceted artists I could think of and the fact that despite this she has done so much and still isn't as recognized as she should be is beyond criminal. This is so horrible to hear
I love her music and artistic genius soooo much, ive beenna day one fan. I'm glad to learn more details about what she went through, dangelo is right for calling attention to it!!! I hope she will have a lot of the public rallying behind her when the trail finally starts. Just want to give her a big hug :(
Thank you for making a vid about this… ive been a big fka twigs fan and always knew this story and told it to ppl who like shia , he’s an absolute monster who needs to face justice
People falling for Shia's fake "realness" in that Jon Berthal interview is disappointing but not surprising. FKA Twig is so brave, while he* is a coward and a monster.
💔
Having a notif from D’Angelo saying pathetic. while I’m watching stardew videos is not something I had on my bingo card lol
heart sank n shit
This needs to be studied!
LMMMAOOO
He's judging you picking Shane as a husband.
@ incredibly accurate comment
This channel is so important !! Thank you for your videos
I love that you focused on her courage, not his pain. I feel like this could as easily been called 'Brave'. Thank you so much for giving folks a voice with your platform. So impressed by your unique flourish.
also, note in that interview that shia distances himself from the horrible things he did to twigs by referring to himself as "the man that was involved in that relationship." using the third person makes it seem like he's explaining that he's grown and is a better person now, he's not that awful man anymore--if, like d'angelo says, you're not listening.
I’m really grateful for FKA Twigs not giving up and for you D’Angelo, for giving more coverage of this. This is an exhausting thing to have to deal with. I have been in her shoes, been choked, held in a room, not aloud to see friends, threatened constantly with violence, been told I should be grateful I wasn’t getting treated worse. And always his behavior was my fault. I went to court for a restraining order and got lucky that the female judge could see right thru his act which was him desperately trying to redirect and control the courtroom narrative and infact even trying to claim he didn’t know where the home he owned for 10 years was on a map (!!?). I got lucky that I was listened to by this judge. I had called the cops twice before and they didn’t help at all. It’s not easy to stand up for yourself and pursue justice, keep going woman, you got this!!
thank you so much for speaking about this d'angelo. as a survivor, seeing stuff like this play out so publicly can be so triggering, esp when people doubt what you've been through. It means a lot that a male creator is using their platform for this so thank you so much.
❤❤
I thought about it too. Male creators should push these stories about topics that a lot of woman experience. It's a great way to bring awareness of issues that are so complex and yet still, usually overlooked.
Also, from an abused person to another abused person, I hope you're doing well now 💗
It's so crazy to me seeing how a man can get away with abuse just by admitting he is an abuser and saying, "Sorry." Pathetic doesn't even begin to describe the state of this situation
Yte men get away with eeeeeeverything .
The bar is so pathetically low for men.
thank you for making this video, she saw it and shouted you out! :,) i’m so happy she knows how supported and loved she is ❤
Thank you D’Angello for calling this out. You give me hope and make me not give up in all men.
The way my faith in men is based on select youtubers lmfao
@@nari5161and it shouldn't be, it takes so many past youtubers ended up being a bad guys, for me to actually not put anyone especially male youtubers on a pedestal
@@nari5161 listen. We are in a world with constant attacks on our healthcare, sexually harassed every time we go outside, devalued by almost every man out there from politians to family members, treated like trash from internet commenters like you to the point where we wonder “ is it better to just be quiet?”, and hurt by our partners. So, I’ll take a man speaking out for women wherever i can. It’s pathetic that it has to be a UA-camr, but that is because men today are pathetic.
fka twigs deserves so much love and kindness :( be gentle w her
FKA twigs shared this on her story and thanked you for covering it so well!!
Thank you so much for the immediate video warning! I unfortunately can not watch this content but the upfront TW is so appreciated!!
Your lighthearted videos are a lot of fun, but man oh man, it felt validating to hear someone else saying this online, and you handled the topic with outstanding empathy and intelligence. Thank you.
"Why didn't she leave?" She did. "Why didn't she call the cops?" SHE DID. I guess there's no credit to be had if she doesn't do it quick enough for the red pill bros (let's be honest - she could literally never leave fast enough for them to be satisfied). Thank you for covering this, D'Angelo. From someone who has experienced domestic violence, it means a lot to see a man with such a large platform cover this sensitive issue with such grace and compassion.
The fact that people were literally praising him like: HE is a real man, accepted his mistakes on camera. LIKE WTF. He ain't no real man! A real man would never hit a woman in the first place!
Ya know, i dated a guy for a couple years when we were both active alcoholics. We were terrible to each other at times. He wasn't abusive in this systematic sort of way but sometimes was physically abusive. Between 1-2 years after we broke up, he called and gave a very nice apology. He didn't blame his work or feelings or even alcohol (though i don't believe he'd do these things sober). He said basically that he was wrong and he did it and it should never happen. It was great. We haven't really talked since but we're both sober, ive heard he has a kid and at least from a distance, it seems hes changed. I fully believe he has or could. You have to admit your faults and its so sad these podcast fans have fallen for this false "accountability".
This! I really believe people can change, but change requires him to actually face what he did.
If he was actually sorry, he would say it in court, it frustrating.
As a twigs fan. Thank you. She’s been going thru so much. So so much. It’s been years, and I hate seeing this happen to her. She deserves the world.
THANK YOU SO MUCH for LOUDLY advocating for survivors. This means the world to some of us who will never see justice. Fr thank you for calling Shia's bs out