Hey y'all it's Drea, here's a few articles that provide research of growth mindsets vs. fixed mindsets.. There has actually been plenty of research to prove that your mindset can improve your life. I can always provide more, since I always just "disagree just to disagree" lol lindagraham-mft.net/change-your-mindset-change-your-life/ www.charlesleon.uk/blog/mindset-how-growth-or-fixed-mindsets-can-create-success-or-failure352020 Also here's the link to the book.. www.amazon.com/Courage-Be-Disliked-Phenomenon-Happiness/dp/1501197274/ref=asc_df_1501197274/?tag=hyprod-20&linkCode=df0&hvadid=245369089410&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=4243357920827245647&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=m&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9010928&hvtargid=pla-554722105364&psc=1&mcid=7998615c9b39374ca3944e98c8ff5c00&gclid=Cj0KCQiA2KitBhCIARIsAPPMEhIQLXJMrwMihmpKv4lpTMZ3XmgprkzPTelZCdEduO-EraA_xDq0vx8aAlg9EALw_wcB
I am currently reading a book called “doing the work” by a holistic psychologist and the author shares countless stories of research of how it’s really all in our mind
It’s easy for somebody that’s never been homeless, in poverty, depressed etc to tell someone to just “change their mindset”. People that have known real, heart breaking, soul crushing struggle know what’s up. Nothing to argue about.
I don’t think she was being offensive by saying this either. it’s simply true sometimes you cannot let your situation confine you for life…like she said…sometimes that DOES still happen…but she was more so motivating and pushing the thought of “rise above”…or did I only catch those vibes 😂I truly don’t think she was being insensitive and you don’t have to go thru someone’s EXACT struggle to feel them. nothing to argue about. 💖💖💖💖💖💖
I love how lex always gives reasonable knowledge to support her opinions and how she’s understanding multiple point of views! Instead of disagreeing and repeating the same claim. nice video to the both of you❤
It's Drea.. Here's a few articles that provide research of growth mindsets vs. fixed mindsets.. There has actually been plenty of research to prove that your mindset can improve your life. I can always provide more.. lol lindagraham-mft.net/change-your-mindset-change-your-life/ www.charlesleon.uk/blog/mindset-how-growth-or-fixed-mindsets-can-create-success-or-failure352020 Also here's the link to the book.. www.amazon.com/Courage-Be-Disliked-Phenomenon-Happiness/dp/1501197274/ref=asc_df_1501197274/?tag=hyprod-20&linkCode=df0&hvadid=245369089410&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=4243357920827245647&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=m&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9010928&hvtargid=pla-554722105364&psc=1&mcid=7998615c9b39374ca3944e98c8ff5c00&gclid=Cj0KCQiA2KitBhCIARIsAPPMEhIQLXJMrwMihmpKv4lpTMZ3XmgprkzPTelZCdEduO-EraA_xDq0vx8aAlg9EALw_wcB
Lex was pulling teeth during the mindset topic trying to get drea to understand her point . I def agree some ppl are wired differently. & the past does matter to an extent
I agree with Lex on the hardships of getting out of certain circumstances. It’s more work someone may have to put in to get out than maybe the next person, such as someone who naturally knows finesse.
The "mindset" conversation was constructive dialogue a lot of people need to hear. This dialogue also helps people understand how to communicate regardless of whether they agree or disagree. I like this.
LEX WAS SPITTIN DURING THE MINDSET SEGMENT! I love how she was born into a soft life but is down to earth enough that she can understand how your past up bringing's can have an effect on your mindset, future and future self! Love her down!
Both of yall are right! Research says that if “the cards you are dealt” are full of different traumas like financial trauma and homelessness it is very influential for your life path and also actually changes brain chemistry, but regardless of that foundation everyone has the personal ability to succeed
I think your past doesn’t dictate your future, but your past has an impact on your journey. To expand, certain decisions an individual makes is based on their knowledge or circumstances from their past experiences. In a sense, you both are right, just speaking from different perspectives!
Ehhh I agree with lex. Everyone doesn’t have the same thought process or emotional intelligence. Yes, some people do make excuses bc they don’t want to change their behavior BUT the past shapes who we are. It easy to say the past doesn’t matter and we have to choose to move on but unless you have the tools, resources, support, and/or knowledge your past can cripple you. IMO life is hard, some people don’t get dealt the best cards in life. It’s not fair to say that people just need to stop making excuses and change their mindset. Just my opinion but im interested to see what everyone else thinks!
Ayooo Lex P you are a fucking star! It’s very rare that I bust out laughing at anything and you get me every episode. I think that Emmy is closer than you think girl.
Does the Past Matter? The answer is Yes. The hardwork from YOUR PAST matters just as much as the trauma. Not acknowledging that you have been traumatized will hold you back. Trauma causes psychological damage diagnosis or not. I agree with Lex. A lot of the times people don’t know where the root cause of their problems stem from and it’s not just a lack of motivation. It typically stems from something from their past. It must be acknowledged before you can solve the problem. Healing is necessary and Memory is key.
As a person who has actually struggled due to the position my mom was in…I agree with Drea. I watched my mom struggle and blame everyone and everything around her. Nothing was ever her fault and she swore she was doing everything she could. I ran away @18, got pregnant @19 and I’m now 24 working for myself and working on a second business. I also provide for my mother, who is yet still struggling. I could’ve used what I went through as a crutch , instead I used it as motivation for what I didn’t want. It’s not easy. If it was easy , everyone would be successful, it’s definitely mindset!
I think you’re both right about the first topic. Eventually, if the smoke doesn’t clear , you have to make it ‼️ your pain isn’t your fault, but you’re responsible for your healing 🫶🏾
Regarding the first topic (Drea please share the name of the book!): Both of your viewpoints can be wrapped up with the understanding that *no one* handles *anything* the same way. You can believe in the power of choices while also accepting that, for a plethora of reasons, everyone may not have the capacity or knowledge to make the best/most courageous choices. What you consider an excuse may be someone else’s biggest obstacle. Empathy can put a lot of things in perspective.
Yesss I agree. You’re right, “what you consider an excuse may be someone else’s biggest obstacle.” Everyone isn’t wired the same. IMO when you’ve lived a “easier” life, you won’t understand that sometimes it’s wayyy more complex than a person just making excuses.
Trauma definitely plays a role in someone’s character or even personality because it’s an event that wasn’t resolved or forgotten, and now it’s a part of you. As adults, it’s our job to attend, treat, and try our best to resolve that trauma so that it it doesn’t hinder us in the future
Mindset discussion was great but as someone with major social anxiety that came from self isolating while depressed, even when I get into the mindset of dressing up, going out, and trying to socialize, I run into people who trigger me constantly. Being socially anxious and awkward can attract some negative attention. Life is so unserious though so I just take it one day at a time. Love Lex’s perspective. Everyone is wired different so not everyone can adapt the same mindset like ever..
Anger is a secondary emotions. There is a negative emotion attached like shame, pride, or even sadness. I used to didn’t believe that until I learned to sit in my emotions
I completely agree with Drea on the first topic. Eventually you gotta stop feeling sorry for yourself. It wasn't about how people view you from the outside, it's how you view yourself from the inside. That's why God and keeping in faith is so powerful
I am from Maryland where the crabs are covered in Old Bay and special seasonings. You gotta go home and shower or risk pulling up to the next function smelling like a bag of chips. I’m with Lex on this one. Lol
Idk I think that Drea should open her mind up more when it comes to mental illness, how it develops, how trauma and ptsd affects our development and adulthood etc… then she’ll understand where lex was coming from. There’s more than just depression, everybody can’t just get up and do things. There’s literally changes that happen in your brain when traumatic things happen and it may take a while for someone to heal from it. If you never been in it you’ll never understand it.
Hey boo.. My mind is open to it and idk why y'all are not comprehending that I'm obviously acknowledging mental illness and I understand how it can affect someone's ability to cope and maneuver through life.. I literally said that in the episode, so those are not the people I'm referring to.. It's like y'all are purposely choosing to hear what y'all want because y'all don't like the message..
@@DreaAndLexselective hearing. Selective picking on what to run with. Drea, you are understood in what you said. You’re not wrong. Even homeless/addicts people will tell you their choices led them to where they are. People are dealt bad hands (As Lex said) but a lot of things are accessible now more than ever to start somewhere. Love y’all. Them ppl in the comments really bogus.
@@DreaAndLex No babe I heard that part, it’s not about comprehension at all. I just feel like you didn’t notice you were contradicting yourself by saying you understand mental illness but then saying “but ___ did it, why can’t you?” Or that you did it why can’t someone else. We know that some people made it and was able to figure it out, others just cannot, literally. You only really spoke about depression when speaking about mental illness as if it was the only thing that can affect someone’s ability to get up and get their life together. Some people’s trauma have affected them way worse than I think you know it can affect someone. That’s what I meant by open your mind to different illnesses not just depression and anxiety. I don’t think you were understanding what Lex was trying to say about that. I love the message I just love the right message because a lot of people who haven’t been able to get up and figure it out may have heard that and it could’ve put them down
You ladies are so intelligent. I love this podcast, very versatile topics! I definitely enjoy it more when you guys are solo. Also Lex I’m glad you mentioned the hair because I’ve been wondering the entire show lol! Love y’all ❤❤
Long time listener/viewer first time commenting lol! This is my favorite podcast. Y'all deserve your flowers ❤ So entertaining and relatable. I do prefer the solos over guests but I love all the episodes honestly
Drea isn’t budging on her opinion. There are lots of people that have gone through extreme traumas and/or dealt a bad hand and their past is also their present. But everyone is entitled to their opinion even if it’s harsh
Ooo Chile Dreaa you almost had me turn off the podcast 😂 you had me tight girl and I usually agree with you! You made the comment “I guess I believe in God.” Some people struggle to believe and it’s not because they don’t want to it can be complicated finding a way to build a relationship with the lord. Ultimately people are wired differently, both perspectives are valid. Same time… you have some people who never understand how to control their narrative and some who do yeaaars down the line or even soon. In regards to diagnosed depression and those who self diagnose is a thin line. I spent my first 2-3 years losing friendships, impulsive isolation and decision making. I knew something was off with me but couldn’t call it. By year 4 I had an intense mental breakdown was admitted to the doctor and they told me I had depression. So sometimes people can feel something is off doesn’t always have to be diagnosed immediately. Even so people do not have resources to health care or a support system (good friends, family) to check on them, help them figure stuff out along the way. I can say so much more. I get where you are coming from but there are some blind spots you aren’t seeing.
I love y’all so much and you’re both speaking facts. I just had this conversation with my mom about her choosing to stay in her house yet she complains about always being in the house and being alone. She states that’s where she feels most comfortable due to her health fears. She’s partly making excuses however, just because I don’t understand how her brain works and what her thought processes are, I can see that I need to lay off of her and give her grace. I don’t know what she’s going through and I can’t let my emotions of frustration create a wedge between us. It’s her choice to stay in the house
I LOVE to see mental health topics being discussed in black spaces! But I will say that there is a responsibility one has to make sure that their opinions aren’t damaging to the greater community. If someone goes through something traumatic, it is not just a matter of choice. As Lex stated, there is a physiological response that occurs that affects one’s ability to think logically. On the other hand, growth mindsets are beneficial and healthy as well. I love that y’all’s topics are thought provoking! I’m a therapist and most ppl I see get their info/insight about mental health from the “culture” (social media) first before they see me.
27:49 I still agree with Drea, The discussion definitely has a open perspective of hindering progression and obstacles that occur in the journey. But definitely believe in the impossible! However it’s not always dealt the same and the outcome isn’t dictated by us!
Lex is Hilarious 😂 that baby conversation had me in pieces lol.. drea made a good point about how it’s hard to love someone when you first meet them .. but Drea plz stop cutting Lex off 🙈 you do it a lot lol
1st topic I agree with lex ppl handle situations differently and others shouldn't have a time frame for your trauma! How are you rushing my healing. Drea speaking from a cushioning place its not the same but I understand both.
I appreciate the rawness in y’all content! ❣️ y’all really get me thru some days, always change my perspective & help me be more conscious & hold myself accountable. Thank y’all for the vibes!!! Don’t EVER take out karaoke segment 😭😭😭 def ate
tbh, you can’t speak on anyone else’s personal experience but your own bc it’s a personal experience. you can’t invalidate someone else’s truth. it’s their truth, it doesn’t have to be yours.
sometimes you have to experience it for yourself (like how they say “put yourself in their shoes,” if you were them, you’d do exactly what they do… and bc you’re you, you move how you move).
This was such a great episodes! Idk why the people stressed out about the debate. Yall both had great points.The bed topic was hilariouss And yall read my youtube post on the show 🥹that was such a great surprise. This year is our year bookies ❤love yall
I definitely understand what drea was saying just as much as lex. Sometimes..BOTH people are correct in various ways‼️💯sometimes you have to agree to disagree! They BOTHHH were being understanding of each other…💯😂idk WHAT yall be talking about fr.
I’m in agreement with Drea. Nothing is infinite so I think what Lex is sayin is the exception but we absolutely will let things in our past or life woes be an excuse to not do or the reason why something isn’t happening. It’s easier to find excuses than solutions . I’m def also a believer and I think if ppl had a greater belief and faith folks lives would be different. Mine included. It’s def something I had to work on but it’s given me clarity on my life and self awareness. So I do think that it’s a mindset thing and the choices we make for most of us.
The past does affect your future until you realize ‘how’ it’s affecting you. Then you can make changes and adjustments to become the person you were always meant to be. It starts with awareness and brutal honesty with yourself .
I agree with Drea on people playing victim of their situations . Some people like being the victim and use that as an excuse as to why things don’t work out .
Everybody is not the same. !! Ppl move different and everyone does not have the same 24 hours….. lex tried her best. But prime example that some ppl just don’t get it . But I understand Drea too, but, that out the mud mindset, it’s not likely that in most cases. Which is why it’s highly respected because it’s rare, ppl get that big opportunity.
Yes Drea is right about the mindset part but Lex is right also when she's saying give people grace.. everyone is on their own spiritual journey.. I've had the answers for someone to change & others had the answers that I couldn't mentally grasp at that time because I allowed my emotions to direct my life instead of feeling them.. sitting with them and pushing through them. Some people become stuck which makes them stuck in life as well as their mind.
Love the girls so much Lex looking like she standing on business w her outfit Looking corporate baddie I love drea looks too. The makeup is so beautiful and inspiring
Hey Yall!! So I’m new to the podcast & I find the solo episodes more interesting only because yall remind me of my sister & I. But DREA, I am a seafood boil girly and that shit definitely lingers. My man doesn’t eat seafood and literally every single time, he will talk about me for a least a day or sometimes two, because the garlic smell is lingering around 😂
Hey Pretty ladies, Residooo 😂 and “oh now you wanna wear rubber” is taking me outttt. LOL I put my sister on to yall & both of you make me miss her so bad lol Hey jas I know you gonna see this lmao
1:04:00 😭 Lex you’re me I’m you. The things we say be so out of pocket. We never take life serious. But at the same time we’re very serious when it comes to getting task completed😂😂
(1st topic) I think that Lex is speaking from experience and emotions and Drea is speaking from a logical standpoint - hence she got the info from a male Arthur. Different POV. I agree with both - don’t let your past make you an asshole or hold you back, that’s what growth is for, to become a better version of yourself. However, it takes time and that person themselves can ONLY say when that time is. It’s not up to us to decide.
![[UA] NAVI vs MOUZ | BO5 | IEM Rio 2024](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/CMBYk0cbGoA/mqdefault.jpg)
Hey y'all it's Drea, here's a few articles that provide research of growth mindsets vs. fixed mindsets.. There has actually been plenty of research to prove that your mindset can improve your life. I can always provide more, since I always just "disagree just to disagree" lol
lindagraham-mft.net/change-your-mindset-change-your-life/
www.charlesleon.uk/blog/mindset-how-growth-or-fixed-mindsets-can-create-success-or-failure352020
Also here's the link to the book.. www.amazon.com/Courage-Be-Disliked-Phenomenon-Happiness/dp/1501197274/ref=asc_df_1501197274/?tag=hyprod-20&linkCode=df0&hvadid=245369089410&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=4243357920827245647&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=m&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9010928&hvtargid=pla-554722105364&psc=1&mcid=7998615c9b39374ca3944e98c8ff5c00&gclid=Cj0KCQiA2KitBhCIARIsAPPMEhIQLXJMrwMihmpKv4lpTMZ3XmgprkzPTelZCdEduO-EraA_xDq0vx8aAlg9EALw_wcB
We love a baddie wit receipts 😅💅🏽
Oop - well thanks for sharing 😂
Drea such a Taurus and I love it 😂
I am currently reading a book called “doing the work” by a holistic psychologist and the author shares countless stories of research of how it’s really all in our mind
@@deshaunademi8440🌚😭
Yall know who I want to see as a guest. Yall bartender ! That would be lit to get to know her more. She be vibing
I second this!
Yes!! And the people that be giggling behind the scenes 😂
@@ilovecalico2 yasss 😂 that would fun too.
I agree!
The new segment could be called "The Open Bar" when you read comments from us The Pour Crew!!!
Ooooooo
That would be hilarious 😂😂😂
I like this!!
@@DreaAndLex that's what's up! All I want is a Shoutout. Im proud of you 2 and Im looking forward to the future. *gives tall person hug* 💯💯💯💯
I LIKE DISSSSSSS
Lex was absolutely correct on the 1st topic. We’re all wired differently.
It’s easy for somebody that’s never been homeless, in poverty, depressed etc to tell someone to just “change their mindset”. People that have known real, heart breaking, soul crushing struggle know what’s up. Nothing to argue about.
I don’t think she was being offensive by saying this either. it’s simply true sometimes you cannot let your situation confine you for life…like she said…sometimes that DOES still happen…but she was more so motivating and pushing the thought of “rise above”…or did I only catch those vibes 😂I truly don’t think she was being insensitive and you don’t have to go thru someone’s EXACT struggle to feel them. nothing to argue about. 💖💖💖💖💖💖
@@mekellabuggs3994 Do you suffer from mental illness?
I love how lex always gives reasonable knowledge to support her opinions and how she’s understanding multiple point of views! Instead of disagreeing and repeating the same claim. nice video to the both of you❤
Exactly
It's Drea.. Here's a few articles that provide research of growth mindsets vs. fixed mindsets.. There has actually been plenty of research to prove that your mindset can improve your life. I can always provide more.. lol
lindagraham-mft.net/change-your-mindset-change-your-life/
www.charlesleon.uk/blog/mindset-how-growth-or-fixed-mindsets-can-create-success-or-failure352020
Also here's the link to the book.. www.amazon.com/Courage-Be-Disliked-Phenomenon-Happiness/dp/1501197274/ref=asc_df_1501197274/?tag=hyprod-20&linkCode=df0&hvadid=245369089410&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=4243357920827245647&hvpone=&hvptwo=&hvqmt=&hvdev=m&hvdvcmdl=&hvlocint=&hvlocphy=9010928&hvtargid=pla-554722105364&psc=1&mcid=7998615c9b39374ca3944e98c8ff5c00&gclid=Cj0KCQiA2KitBhCIARIsAPPMEhIQLXJMrwMihmpKv4lpTMZ3XmgprkzPTelZCdEduO-EraA_xDq0vx8aAlg9EALw_wcB
Lex was pulling teeth during the mindset topic trying to get drea to understand her point . I def agree some ppl are wired differently. & the past does matter to an extent
😭 I feel like lex was actually trying to have a convo and drea wanted people to understand the book the same way it hit her when she read it. lol
I agree with Lex on the hardships of getting out of certain circumstances. It’s more work someone may have to put in to get out than maybe the next person, such as someone who naturally knows finesse.
The "mindset" conversation was constructive dialogue a lot of people need to hear. This dialogue also helps people understand how to communicate regardless of whether they agree or disagree. I like this.
Thank you ❤️😊
LEX WAS SPITTIN DURING THE MINDSET SEGMENT! I love how she was born into a soft life but is down to earth enough that she can understand how your past up bringing's can have an effect on your mindset, future and future self! Love her down!
Damn ANOTHER solo?! What did we do to deserve this?😭❤️
Man !!! They doing the Lord’s work with this
I completely feel Lex about the whole depression topic. Drea wasn’t being very open minded.
When Lex recalled the time she had lived in her car.. I could tell she spoke from experience, and it’s inspiring to say the least💗✨
Both of yall are right! Research says that if “the cards you are dealt” are full of different traumas like financial trauma and homelessness it is very influential for your life path and also actually changes brain chemistry, but regardless of that foundation everyone has the personal ability to succeed
I think your past doesn’t dictate your future, but your past has an impact on your journey. To expand, certain decisions an individual makes is based on their knowledge or circumstances from their past experiences. In a sense, you both are right, just speaking from different perspectives!
Ehhh I agree with lex. Everyone doesn’t have the same thought process or emotional intelligence. Yes, some people do make excuses bc they don’t want to change their behavior BUT the past shapes who we are. It easy to say the past doesn’t matter and we have to choose to move on but unless you have the tools, resources, support, and/or knowledge your past can cripple you. IMO life is hard, some people don’t get dealt the best cards in life. It’s not fair to say that people just need to stop making excuses and change their mindset. Just my opinion but im interested to see what everyone else thinks!
Ayooo Lex P you are a fucking star! It’s very rare that I bust out laughing at anything and you get me every episode. I think that Emmy is closer than you think girl.
Thank you ❤️❤️
Does the Past Matter?
The answer is Yes.
The hardwork from YOUR PAST matters just as much as the trauma. Not acknowledging that you have been traumatized will hold you back.
Trauma causes psychological damage diagnosis or not.
I agree with Lex. A lot of the times people don’t know where the root cause of their problems stem from and it’s not just a lack of motivation. It typically stems from something from their past. It must be acknowledged before you can solve the problem. Healing is necessary and Memory is key.
“Oh now you wanna wear a rubber” Lmao Lex is a fool
😂
Hey ladies! I like the intro. The evolution of this show from WineDown Wednesdays is such a telling story of how far you've come!! 💯💯💯💯💯💯
As a person who has actually struggled due to the position my mom was in…I agree with Drea. I watched my mom struggle and blame everyone and everything around her. Nothing was ever her fault and she swore she was doing everything she could. I ran away @18, got pregnant @19 and I’m now 24 working for myself and working on a second business. I also provide for my mother, who is yet still struggling. I could’ve used what I went through as a crutch , instead I used it as motivation for what I didn’t want. It’s not easy. If it was easy , everyone would be successful, it’s definitely mindset!
“Oh now you wanna wear rubber”
Lmaooo LEX!!
Dre and lex have this same debate on life and they literally agree to disagree every single time on this exact convo 🤣🤦🏽♀️
🤣🤣 I get both sides though
I think you’re both right about the first topic. Eventually, if the smoke doesn’t clear , you have to make it ‼️ your pain isn’t your fault, but you’re responsible for your healing 🫶🏾
Regarding the first topic (Drea please share the name of the book!):
Both of your viewpoints can be wrapped up with the understanding that *no one* handles *anything* the same way. You can believe in the power of choices while also accepting that, for a plethora of reasons, everyone may not have the capacity or knowledge to make the best/most courageous choices. What you consider an excuse may be someone else’s biggest obstacle. Empathy can put a lot of things in perspective.
Hi boo, the book is called "The Courage To Be Disliked"
Yesss I agree. You’re right, “what you consider an excuse may be someone else’s biggest obstacle.” Everyone isn’t wired the same. IMO when you’ve lived a “easier” life, you won’t understand that sometimes it’s wayyy more complex than a person just making excuses.
@@dericamiller6126💯that’s real
Trauma definitely plays a role in someone’s character or even personality because it’s an event that wasn’t resolved or forgotten, and now it’s a part of you.
As adults, it’s our job to attend, treat, and try our best to resolve that trauma so that it it doesn’t hinder us in the future
i'm lovin how its been back to back videos of just ya two 🥰
Mindset discussion was great but as someone with major social anxiety that came from self isolating while depressed, even when I get into the mindset of dressing up, going out, and trying to socialize, I run into people who trigger me constantly. Being socially anxious and awkward can attract some negative attention. Life is so unserious though so I just take it one day at a time. Love Lex’s perspective. Everyone is wired different so not everyone can adapt the same mindset like ever..
I went to a Total Wine in MD and asked for LS Cream Liquor and they had it! I added it to my hot chocolate during this snowstorm and it was good!
that jumpsuit looks sooo good on lex, that would’ve been my faithful jumpsuit too😍🤣
Anger is a secondary emotions. There is a negative emotion attached like shame, pride, or even sadness. I used to didn’t believe that until I learned to sit in my emotions
I definitely think your past shapes you into who you are but it’s up to you how you move forward.
I completely agree with Drea on the first topic. Eventually you gotta stop feeling sorry for yourself. It wasn't about how people view you from the outside, it's how you view yourself from the inside. That's why God and keeping in faith is so powerful
Ya after watching this I’ve realized I REALLY MISS y’all SOLO episodes. This episode was So good 😌!
I am from Maryland where the crabs are covered in Old Bay and special seasonings. You gotta go home and shower or risk pulling up to the next function smelling like a bag of chips. I’m with Lex on this one. Lol
Idk I think that Drea should open her mind up more when it comes to mental illness, how it develops, how trauma and ptsd affects our development and adulthood etc… then she’ll understand where lex was coming from. There’s more than just depression, everybody can’t just get up and do things. There’s literally changes that happen in your brain when traumatic things happen and it may take a while for someone to heal from it. If you never been in it you’ll never understand it.
Hey boo.. My mind is open to it and idk why y'all are not comprehending that I'm obviously acknowledging mental illness and I understand how it can affect someone's ability to cope and maneuver through life.. I literally said that in the episode, so those are not the people I'm referring to.. It's like y'all are purposely choosing to hear what y'all want because y'all don't like the message..
@@DreaAndLexselective hearing. Selective picking on what to run with.
Drea, you are understood in what you said. You’re not wrong. Even homeless/addicts people will tell you their choices led them to where they are. People are dealt bad hands (As Lex said) but a lot of things are accessible now more than ever to start somewhere. Love y’all. Them ppl in the comments really bogus.
@@breadwinner8585It’s not selective hearing. The question is “Does the Past Matter” the answer is “Yes”. A diagnosis doesn’t change that answer.
@@DreaAndLex No babe I heard that part, it’s not about comprehension at all. I just feel like you didn’t notice you were contradicting yourself by saying you understand mental illness but then saying “but ___ did it, why can’t you?” Or that you did it why can’t someone else. We know that some people made it and was able to figure it out, others just cannot, literally. You only really spoke about depression when speaking about mental illness as if it was the only thing that can affect someone’s ability to get up and get their life together. Some people’s trauma have affected them way worse than I think you know it can affect someone. That’s what I meant by open your mind to different illnesses not just depression and anxiety. I don’t think you were understanding what Lex was trying to say about that. I love the message I just love the right message because a lot of people who haven’t been able to get up and figure it out may have heard that and it could’ve put them down
Drea! these colors are soooo pretty on you!
Thank you ❤❤
My hairstylist is @richlookhair on IG 🩵 this is the luxe curl
Y’all do deserve more subscribers I never noticed how many yall had!
This episode bringing me back to life...lex on one 😭😭
I kept refreshing & finally! Just in time for my mile walk/jog 🙌🏽
I really like this show because even though I agree with one of yall more on topics, the other still makes a great point.
Thank you ❤️❤️
You ladies are so intelligent. I love this podcast, very versatile topics! I definitely enjoy it more when you guys are solo. Also Lex I’m glad you mentioned the hair because I’ve been wondering the entire show lol! Love y’all ❤❤
I love this show. Once I actually start to build a social media brand I will be on this show. I’m speaking it into existence.
Long time listener/viewer first time commenting lol! This is my favorite podcast. Y'all deserve your flowers ❤ So entertaining and relatable. I do prefer the solos over guests but I love all the episodes honestly
I love when the girls talk about serious smart topics. It doesn’t always have to be about men and I love that. The first topic is such a good topic
Drea isn’t budging on her opinion. There are lots of people that have gone through extreme traumas and/or dealt a bad hand and their past is also their present. But everyone is entitled to their opinion even if it’s harsh
I love y’all solo videos! It’s like listening to a conversation. ❤ I agree some people can talk themselves into some opportunities…
This was a good episode. I was at work listening and couldn’t stop laughing
Ooo Chile Dreaa you almost had me turn off the podcast 😂 you had me tight girl and I usually agree with you! You made the comment “I guess I believe in God.” Some people struggle to believe and it’s not because they don’t want to it can be complicated finding a way to build a relationship with the lord. Ultimately people are wired differently, both perspectives are valid. Same time… you have some people who never understand how to control their narrative and some who do yeaaars down the line or even soon. In regards to diagnosed depression and those who self diagnose is a thin line. I spent my first 2-3 years losing friendships, impulsive isolation and decision making. I knew something was off with me but couldn’t call it. By year 4 I had an intense mental breakdown was admitted to the doctor and they told me I had depression. So sometimes people can feel something is off doesn’t always have to be diagnosed immediately. Even so people do not have resources to health care or a support system (good friends, family) to check on them, help them figure stuff out along the way. I can say so much more. I get where you are coming from but there are some blind spots you aren’t seeing.
The nicest comments are always under a Pour Minds video. We love Drea and Lex
I love y’all so much and you’re both speaking facts. I just had this conversation with my mom about her choosing to stay in her house yet she complains about always being in the house and being alone. She states that’s where she feels most comfortable due to her health fears. She’s partly making excuses however, just because I don’t understand how her brain works and what her thought processes are, I can see that I need to lay off of her and give her grace. I don’t know what she’s going through and I can’t let my emotions of frustration create a wedge between us. It’s her choice to stay in the house
I LOVE to see mental health topics being discussed in black spaces! But I will say that there is a responsibility one has to make sure that their opinions aren’t damaging to the greater community. If someone goes through something traumatic, it is not just a matter of choice. As Lex stated, there is a physiological response that occurs that affects one’s ability to think logically. On the other hand, growth mindsets are beneficial and healthy as well. I love that y’all’s topics are thought provoking! I’m a therapist and most ppl I see get their info/insight about mental health from the “culture” (social media) first before they see me.
no but the get into the bop performance at the end ATE DOWN!🤣🔥🔥 thanks for another great episode ladies! ❤️
I Just KNEWWWW IT WAS DREA who said “decorum” lol 😂 before I even clicked on the episode I said yeah DREA said that shit 😂😂😂😂😂
Know me 😭😭
27:49 I still agree with Drea, The discussion definitely has a open perspective of hindering progression and obstacles that occur in the journey. But definitely believe in the impossible! However it’s not always dealt the same and the outcome isn’t dictated by us!
Lex is Hilarious 😂 that baby conversation had me in pieces lol.. drea made a good point about how it’s hard to love someone when you first meet them .. but Drea plz stop cutting Lex off 🙈 you do it a lot lol
1st topic I agree with lex ppl handle situations differently and others shouldn't have a time frame for your trauma! How are you rushing my healing. Drea speaking from a cushioning place its not the same but I understand both.
I appreciate the rawness in y’all content! ❣️ y’all really get me thru some days, always change my perspective & help me be more conscious & hold myself accountable. Thank y’all for the vibes!!! Don’t EVER take out karaoke segment 😭😭😭 def ate
On that first topic… Drea where’s your empathy 😭
Yes Lex is correct. Just like your upbringing can affect your relationships, it can affect anything in life.
Yall know we liveeee for the solo episodes ❤
Another solo i love love love this 😂😂❤️
"all about love" by bell hooks is good. A hard read.
Can we get a Pour minds x High Maintenance Tour? I love y’all down 🫶🏾🫶🏾🫶🏾
And im with lex im not going to party after juicy crab . Jumping all up and down garlic butter pootin on the dance floor . 😂
Right! 😂
Pootin on the dance floor is crazy 😭
tbh, you can’t speak on anyone else’s personal experience but your own bc it’s a personal experience. you can’t invalidate someone else’s truth. it’s their truth, it doesn’t have to be yours.
sometimes you have to experience it for yourself (like how they say “put yourself in their shoes,” if you were them, you’d do exactly what they do… and bc you’re you, you move how you move).
The karaoke at the end had me weeaakk 🤣🤣
you know we love a good solo episode :)
This was such a great episodes! Idk why the people stressed out about the debate. Yall both had great points.The bed topic was hilariouss And yall read my youtube post on the show 🥹that was such a great surprise. This year is our year bookies ❤love yall
YALL DID SO GOOD IN KARAOKE 😫😫😫😫 CMON!!
The new segment should be called "Pour Talk"❤ love from East Oakland Ca / Bay Area
Fun fact Vitamin d? if you’re low on it you get depressed & it’s very common to be low in magnesium and vitamin d ;)
It’s the singing at the end for me🤣🤣 Lex is a fool! Love it!
The looks and the performance at the end 💋“chefs kiss”
The fact that Drea took Lex serious from 12:10 to 12:30 is why y’all so funny to watch.
I definitely understand what drea was saying just as much as lex. Sometimes..BOTH people are correct in various ways‼️💯sometimes you have to agree to disagree! They BOTHHH were being understanding of each other…💯😂idk WHAT yall be talking about fr.
Y’all should call the new segment pour it up
I’m in agreement with Drea. Nothing is infinite so I think what Lex is sayin is the exception but we absolutely will let things in our past or life woes be an excuse to not do or the reason why something isn’t happening. It’s easier to find excuses than solutions . I’m def also a believer and I think if ppl had a greater belief and faith folks lives would be different. Mine included. It’s def something I had to work on but it’s given me clarity on my life and self awareness. So I do think that it’s a mindset thing and the choices we make for most of us.
Tai always glowing looking beautiful too
I domt drink no more so vicariously drinking watching y'all and listening to the recipes ❤
The past does affect your future until you realize ‘how’ it’s affecting you. Then you can make changes and adjustments to become the person you were always meant to be. It starts with awareness and brutal honesty with yourself .
I agree with Drea on people playing victim of their situations . Some people like being the victim and use that as an excuse as to why things don’t work out .
I agree with both of the ladies because both things can be true at the same time. I believe it is situational for sure.
Everybody is not the same. !! Ppl move different and everyone does not have the same 24 hours….. lex tried her best. But prime example that some ppl just don’t get it . But I understand Drea too, but, that out the mud mindset, it’s not likely that in most cases. Which is why it’s highly respected because it’s rare, ppl get that big opportunity.
Yes Drea is right about the mindset part but Lex is right also when she's saying give people grace.. everyone is on their own spiritual journey.. I've had the answers for someone to change & others had the answers that I couldn't mentally grasp at that time because I allowed my emotions to direct my life instead of feeling them.. sitting with them and pushing through them. Some people become stuck which makes them stuck in life as well as their mind.
Love the girls so much
Lex looking like she standing on business w her outfit
Looking corporate baddie
I love drea looks too.
The makeup is so beautiful and inspiring
Hey Yall!! So I’m new to the podcast & I find the solo episodes more interesting only because yall remind me of my sister & I. But DREA, I am a seafood boil girly and that shit definitely lingers. My man doesn’t eat seafood and literally every single time, he will talk about me for a least a day or sometimes two, because the garlic smell is lingering around 😂
Happy Friday Ladies!🍾🥂
Whoever wrote the question about traveling solo. I’m interested in traveling also in the same situation!!
Hey Pretty ladies, Residooo 😂 and “oh now you wanna wear rubber” is taking me outttt. LOL I put my sister on to yall & both of you make me miss her so bad lol Hey jas I know you gonna see this lmao
hey sis heyyyyy haha love them and miss you so so much 🥹🤞🏽💕
The sister dynamics🩷
Yo , y’all funny asf😭😭😭 the no bib is sending me!
1:04:00
😭 Lex you’re me I’m you. The things we say be so out of pocket. We never take life serious. But at the same time we’re very serious when it comes to getting task completed😂😂
When Lex was describing heaven I diedddd 😂😂😂 (no pun intended)
A really great convo in this episode
Y’all ate that karaoke at the end 😂❤ I love y’all
Lex hit them falsettos at the end lol.
(1st topic) I think that Lex is speaking from experience and emotions and Drea is speaking from a logical standpoint - hence she got the info from a male Arthur. Different POV.
I agree with both - don’t let your past make you an asshole or hold you back, that’s what growth is for, to become a better version of yourself.
However, it takes time and that person themselves can ONLY say when that time is. It’s not up to us to decide.
Im enjoying the solo episodes ❤
Lex talking about Rod Wave has me cryinggg 😂
ayeeeeeee!!!! p.s. Lex, the black hair is EATINGGGGGGGGGGG
“I DONE TOOK YOU TO JUICY CRAB AND YOU CANT GIVE ME A LIL HEAD? ITS STRICT AROUND THESE PARTS” 😂😂😂😂