My identity crisis has a first name: Stephanie Vicente at TEDxElginSt

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  • Опубліковано 15 лис 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 118

  • @theredqueen6911
    @theredqueen6911 6 років тому +179

    As having BPD, we tend to be chamleons. it takes so much therapy to find out who we are. it's so alien to us. Recovery is worth it!

    • @ZemplinTemplar
      @ZemplinTemplar 4 роки тому +6

      I've got a friend dealing with BPD, but she's making a very promising recovery. It's tough, not always straightforward, a long-term process and requires a lot of patience on her part. But she's achieved so much purely by her own willpower, her endearing stubbornness to not give up, all in a relatively short time, that I'm deeply impressed. She's a fighter, not a quitter. Coupled with her intelligence and kind heart, it's part of why I love her (platonically).
      Both her and me can honestly say to anyone suffering from BPD, but doubting anything could change: Please seek help, seek adequate forms of therapy (it can be very individual), and if necessary, also some medication. As you say, Redqueen, recovery is worth it. And in the case of BPD, it's actually highly probable. The majority of sufferers improve by middle-age, and if one starts therapy early, he or she can free themselves of most BPD issues in 10, at most 20 years time. I've even heard of cases, when BPD sufferers recovered after just a few years, even under five. Like this whole emotional disorder and its healing methods, the recovery rate can be really individual. Recovery is indeed worth it, entirely so.

    • @sauravgupta4103
      @sauravgupta4103 4 роки тому +2

      I have no/low sense of self either. But am not A BPD. Have consulted through psychiatrist she said I don't have BPD. Now, she's performing CBT on me. Will it help to regain it ? . Can I regain my sense of self ? One thing's for sure, I do not have BPD but low/no sense of self. All symptoms doesn't match. It's not necessary to have BPD if you have low/no sense of self . Will it help? Please reply man. I know how it feels. Please reply. Lots of love.Btw my age is 20 now. Will be 21 on 9DEC 2020.

    • @nicholaslandry6367
      @nicholaslandry6367 3 роки тому +1

      @@sauravgupta4103 you need 5/9 traits to be diagnosed but you could have up to 4/5 without diagnosis
      Cbt can potentially work though DBT aka dialectical behavioral therapy is the most commonly recommended for bpd
      America's diagnostic laws are weird but psychiatrists tend to be better trained but they may lean more towards medicinally treatable conditions
      Talk to the professional honestly about any concerns and questions you have and if you don't feel comfortable with that maybe that discomfort would actually be a good talking point to start with

    • @nicholaslandry6367
      @nicholaslandry6367 3 роки тому +1

      @@sauravgupta4103 I hope that helps

    • @kirsten1007
      @kirsten1007 3 роки тому +1

      Wow. I need to dig in because I don't feel at 53 that I know myself well

  • @thisismypointe
    @thisismypointe 6 років тому +75

    I'm happy to see BPD having more talk around it! we need people to talk about this desperately....I've met too many people with BPD who feel so so alone, because depression and anxiety are more socially acceptable to discuss :/

    • @annmarie6870
      @annmarie6870 2 роки тому

      Exactly and it still seems to be like this unfortunately

  • @heathergldwtr6997
    @heathergldwtr6997 7 років тому +72

    Thank you for sharing! I too suffer from the lived experience of BPD and I am just beginning to work things out through therapy. I drink these stories (of other people with the disorder) up like water. So soothing to know I am not alone. You inspire me. Thanks for being so brave.

    • @VioletGrell
      @VioletGrell 7 років тому +3

      Therapy had helped me a lot. It took time and it was not easy, but I'm finally starting to fight back against bpd. Don't give up!

    • @ZemplinTemplar
      @ZemplinTemplar 4 роки тому

      Heather and José, good luck to both of you. As José correctly states, BPD is entirely treatable. It's a long-term process, but not forever. Therapy is key. Don't be afraid of it, "go for it", as they say. Best wishes. :-)

  • @ilykmicoffey
    @ilykmicoffey 6 років тому +23

    Thank you for sharing this! I've been recently diagnosed with BPD so it restores a lot of hope in me to see such a successful woman holding herself together after going through what I'm currently going through, and that my illness will not deter me from my goals if I keep going with my treatment ♥️

  • @patriciafaithfull6360
    @patriciafaithfull6360 5 років тому +10

    I agree with her statement, "no help if you want to live and get better; only crisis management."

  • @juanpablomedina5924
    @juanpablomedina5924 9 років тому +40

    You're such an inspiration. You give me me bit of hope in what seems to be a life sentence with this issue. I need people like you around me, who can understand.

    • @ZemplinTemplar
      @ZemplinTemplar 4 роки тому

      J. P., nowadays, it's not a life sentence. Recovery rates, while individual, are very good. It's not an issue you need to be saddled with for your whole life. But the sooner you seek good, experienced therapists for it, the better.

  • @eh4235
    @eh4235 6 років тому +40

    Is there a cure? I keep thinking that true love will heal it , but I can't experience true love when everyone avoids me for being so emotional or talkative or hurtful or negative. I have been successful in my life, it doesn't make me less empathetic or smart, but just now, by doing therapy and doing something outside my box, and working with people in health care, is helping overcome this trauma or negative or denying sense of self. I am rebuilding it. It's what I should have done long ago, but suffered. Even now my therapists are not treating me for bpd, but trauma. I never been diagnosed because I am up to pursuing education and not suicidal. But I constantly have to keep myself in check. The struggle is real when you try hard to act normal but inside is like fire.

    • @emfromthechi
      @emfromthechi 6 років тому +4

      I think unconditional love is the cure. Before i got a dog, my bpd was really bad. Now, even though I still suffer a lot, my dogs help me feel loved and my suicidal thoughts arent as frequent. When i do think about suicide, I always think of my dogs and how they need me. Sometimes I do think theyd be better off without me, but I love them so much I could never do to them what I fear the most, which is to abandon them.

    • @perxu2329
      @perxu2329 6 років тому +5

      i’ve experienced unconditional love as someone with bpd and as i can’t simply escape my symptoms, i was overwhelmed with paranoia, fear of abandonment, and feelings of being unworthy the entire time. as nice of an idea as love cures all is, the best way to treat bpd is through cognitive behavioral therapy. having support from others plays a key role in recovery but it isn’t the Cure.

    • @user-ll5vv7rv9p
      @user-ll5vv7rv9p 5 років тому

      There is not.

    • @TheMrsRayban
      @TheMrsRayban 5 років тому +2

      I'd say yes, true love, but self-love.

    • @ALCRAN2010
      @ALCRAN2010 5 років тому +2

      There is..
      Manage less than 5 of the 9 symptoms,
      You will then not be bpd.
      The less symptoms the better.

  • @taliafornari9386
    @taliafornari9386 6 років тому +6

    Thank you for talking about this. It inspired me, as I meet the criteria of BPD. Just knowing you aren’t alone, feeling that shared humanity, is so profoundly important.

  • @ellieboehmcarter5041
    @ellieboehmcarter5041 6 років тому +16

    I believe I’ve always had BPD, or at least developed it at an young age.
    Now, my emotions are all over the place..I react inwards so many see me as very cold.
    Facial expressions isn’t my strongest side, which means, I’m not really “talk appeal”. Alone. I’ve gotten used to it, so it doesn’t hurt me like it used to do. I don’t feel like I exist, honestly haven’t for a very very long time. Everything feels like a dream, and I’m just floating, through the crowd of people, browsing the stores and smoking cigarettes. Transparent to the world, I do what I love. I’m happy.

    • @annmarie6870
      @annmarie6870 2 роки тому +2

      I’m going through this now. Time means nothing to me which is really weird I’ll look at the clock and think well another day has gone by or where did the time go? It’s awful. People see me as happy or angry.

  • @sofiehampton
    @sofiehampton 8 років тому +7

    You're not alone ! Thank you for talking about this :) and showing you're success ! Xx

  • @airidaspele
    @airidaspele 5 років тому +4

    Thanks for sharing, Stephanie ❤

  • @blue10880
    @blue10880 2 роки тому +1

    This is my narrative...from diary at 5 to the film. Industry and meds.. Thankyou 💙 I'm 41 now and my daughter is struggling at 16 ❤️

    • @blue10880
      @blue10880 2 роки тому

      Honestly I can't express the healing you create 💙

  • @jessisamess969
    @jessisamess969 6 років тому +8

    I’m so glad I found this

  • @사이다-v5l
    @사이다-v5l 4 роки тому +11

    Can I ask why this does not have as many views as the other Ted videos?
    It deserves all the credit it can get it is very hard to come out like this.

    • @krystalk1840
      @krystalk1840 Рік тому

      Because she doesn't actually have BPD but just wants clicks

  • @JPinthe719
    @JPinthe719 2 роки тому +1

    Having BPD, BP 2 and RAD, I suffered for so many years because I was taking Anti-depressants and they wrecked my life and stole everything while I was a narcissistic zombie...It's harder now that I have to live in reality, but I really have a handle on myself and who I am. God and my self awareness are key to survival. Maybe they help others, but I tell everyone I know to stay away from medications for these disorders. I was high functioning, family, masters degree, way up there in management and then I threw it all away - including my marriage. It takes work every day to rebuild my life and not be tempted by old demons - I will never go back on medications. 2 years free after having poison pumped in me by docs for 23 years.

  • @tinkerbelle143
    @tinkerbelle143 7 років тому +20

    I wish I knew other BPDS in Ottawa. It would be nice to have a support group.

    • @Renae12234
      @Renae12234 7 років тому +1

      I don't know where one at either but I find support groups online such as facebook some of them are nice to be apart of

  • @penelopek9645
    @penelopek9645 5 років тому +1

    Super strong young lady she has become good for her !

  • @brittany5416
    @brittany5416 3 роки тому

    I have BPD and I’m so happy to see it talked about on TED talks!

  • @krystalk1840
    @krystalk1840 Рік тому +2

    Wasn't it nice when Ted Talks actually meant something and were by reputable sources who actually educate and "enlighten"? This is NOT borderline personality disorder.

  • @cheekysheiky1000
    @cheekysheiky1000 8 років тому +80

    Strangely I started having severe anxiety right around 19 as well. I have bpd.

    • @aversiteacuerdas
      @aversiteacuerdas 8 років тому +10

      same shit, but my anxiety attacks dont let me breathe , make me feel nauseous... last between 30 min to hours and they still here.

    • @netentiny
      @netentiny 8 років тому +6

      started my anxiety attacks when i was like 18, have bpd too

    • @aversiteacuerdas
      @aversiteacuerdas 8 років тому +4

      same bdp was diagnosed before but my anxiety started getting worse around 18...

    • @VioletGrell
      @VioletGrell 7 років тому +10

      I lived with bpd for many years without knowing it. It wasn't until I begin having therapy that I got aware of this pathology. It is so stressing and scary. Not knowing how to fit in society. Thinking that your ideas won't help anyone in any way. The ambiguity of a most likely sad future. Fortunately, I am now able to do something against my bpd. It's not easy. Anxiety still attacks me. But at least I can fight back now.

    • @majd9187
      @majd9187 7 років тому +1

      Cheekysheiky same!

  • @felix52282
    @felix52282 5 років тому +6

    Im thinking that this explains alot of what i have went through since i was a child. I wish as a child this was more recognized. At 37 i feel like a scolded child always alone and afraid.

  • @shizzle1903
    @shizzle1903 5 років тому +1

    Good for her.
    Thanks for your talk

  • @brittanygilliam5391
    @brittanygilliam5391 5 років тому +7

    I just want to get better ...😔

  • @grey6253
    @grey6253 7 років тому +5

    Ottawa is still a dead zone for helpful resources. If you do find some the waitlist is like months or years.

  • @catyad7661
    @catyad7661 6 років тому +5

    She's inspiring !

  • @rayashleigh494
    @rayashleigh494 6 років тому +11

    Wish i could overcome this :(

  • @abdulrahmanmagdy8884
    @abdulrahmanmagdy8884 7 років тому +6

    I am moving through the same symptoms 4 years till now :(

  • @planetofether5462
    @planetofether5462 9 років тому +10

    I live in Ottawa, and I've never found a psychiatrist who sees people more than once a month. Where did she find this person???

    • @stephanievicente4784
      @stephanievicente4784 8 років тому +5

      Heya!
      So what happened was I asked my family doctor to refer me to someone if she had any other patients that might have a psychiatrist. Honestly, it was probably just luck and timing. :(
      But my psychiatrist is really great and he not only sees me as often as I need him to, but he does talk therapy as well (which is rare for a psychiatrist).

  • @fatsiddog
    @fatsiddog 6 років тому +25

    BPD a mazel tov cocktail inside your brain. Have it, hate it.

  • @TaraMae212
    @TaraMae212 Рік тому

    Wow! Love this so much!

  • @David-od4vw
    @David-od4vw 8 років тому +1

    so powerful. thank you.

  • @ZemplinTemplar
    @ZemplinTemplar 4 роки тому +1

    Good work, Stephanie ! :-) (Sorry for the direct adress, just leaving this here as a general note.)
    I agree 100 % that too much mutual exclusivity is becoming the bane of modern civic society. We keep retreating into our own pockets and clicques and then people just distance themselves from each other, and the coldness in society grows. It's even worse for people with mental issues, because they then feel they need to stay in their communities and no one will pay attention to them. And it's not just a Canadian problem, at all. In my own country, I'm planning a project to get people communicating again, rather than just retreat into a particular community and shut themselves off, because that's the easier thing to do. I know it won't be easy, but then, I've had a good friend with BPD, not unlike your case, and that friend has used her experiences for good and is now working in both art and mental health activism. She still has it tough, but she's recovering well, all things considered, and her successes in activism are a joy to behold. Very inspirational, just like you and many others.
    Best of luck to you in continuing to improve your situation with BPD, as well as with the cultural efforts in the capital. Every little good development counts and is meaningful.

  • @loriann2692
    @loriann2692 2 роки тому

    I have bpd. I struggle a lot with not being attached to life. I constantly ask myself "who am i?", "why am I here?"

  • @nancywysemen7196
    @nancywysemen7196 6 років тому +3

    Nice surprise. Hearing the success of a younger person and positivity. Thanks "adopted" niece. I like "nut case" as use full banter.

  • @kittykatBflat
    @kittykatBflat 8 років тому +7

    Was this the outpatient day program at the civic hospital? I'm in this program right now and I have BPD too.

  • @care736
    @care736 5 років тому +3

    this is literally my exact experience with anxiety disorder, i dont know who i am

  • @visualjottings5626
    @visualjottings5626 3 роки тому

    I think, she Should've received more stronger applause.... Wonderful Insights👍

  • @ihavealotoftimeonmyhands4166
    @ihavealotoftimeonmyhands4166 7 років тому +3

    good points

  • @pratyushjha1817
    @pratyushjha1817 5 років тому +3

    Is it normal for guys to have Bpd? I was diagnosed with this two years back. Man it sucks.

    • @christophertuite7200
      @christophertuite7200 5 років тому +1

      Yes. Completely normal although it's reported in girls more than guys which could be down to the fact guys don't always reach out.

    • @ashtenchambliss284
      @ashtenchambliss284 4 роки тому +1

      Yes. Men underreport because anger is socially accepted in men and strong emotional expressiveness is not. Symptoms can be more commonly dismissed by the self or others. It's a huge problem. Take care 🌙

  • @boodiabed6414
    @boodiabed6414 6 років тому +3

    i used to have ativan1mg for 1 month worste medicine i ever had 2 weeks of half a mg i feel you i also take salipax i used to take zoloft 100mg

  • @morgancunningham9230
    @morgancunningham9230 5 років тому +9

    Who else thinks they’re borderline but all they are missing is a diagnosis??

    • @taylorbarnett1199
      @taylorbarnett1199 5 років тому

      Morgan Cunningham keep trying. Don’t stop searching for one

    • @ashtenchambliss284
      @ashtenchambliss284 4 роки тому +1

      Proud of you. BPD symptoms are hard for patients to accept because of the stigma surrounding the disorder. You're already doing so much good for yourself.

  • @Sidvlogs31
    @Sidvlogs31 2 роки тому +1

    Being a tennager I can't even go to counsellor

  • @mandapandamonium8675
    @mandapandamonium8675 Рік тому

    Mine is so complicated and therapy is a luxury i cant afford

  • @kovesh8979
    @kovesh8979 6 років тому +2

    Relatable.

  • @tman5066
    @tman5066 7 років тому

    Is she saying "Involvement with Community or something GREATER than yourself" ???

  • @sentimentalsediment3000
    @sentimentalsediment3000 5 років тому

    Look at her Edie Sedgwick earrings

  • @isabellavaxquez2983
    @isabellavaxquez2983 5 років тому +2

    Oh I’m on ativan

  • @KeithMakank3
    @KeithMakank3 5 років тому +1

    WTF why do people prescribe adavan?

  • @nefelibata4190
    @nefelibata4190 7 років тому

    the 2nd pic is better than the first

  • @Handle-i2q
    @Handle-i2q 7 років тому +13

    this girl need a man who love her unconditionaly

    • @beyondbeauty6921
      @beyondbeauty6921 6 років тому +9

      Amar Zakwan
      You dont understand borderlines they damage anything or anybody good.
      Unstable relationships is a criteria for bpd.

    • @Happy-Me.
      @Happy-Me. 6 років тому +9

      Yep I've been there with my first love who I met up with again after over 30 years! I tried so hard but eventually it would have burned me out. I hope that she can find peace. I feel I have also damaged her as I was her favourite person and I discarded her in the end as I previously had all those years ago!

    • @michellelemos6920
      @michellelemos6920 6 років тому +12

      Amar Zakwan no don't romantacize this please

    • @Happy-Me.
      @Happy-Me. 6 років тому +4

      Mic Lemos I'm not trying to romanticise it's as it was bit yes I agree. These people will destroy you as well as themselves eventually that's why I walked away. She was a quiet borderline bit I'm waiting for the hoover and stalking.

    • @michellelemos6920
      @michellelemos6920 6 років тому +2

      Umm I was replying to the first comment. N these ppl really? I suffer from BPD. N ya it's absolutely your choice. So welp

  • @beyondbeauty6921
    @beyondbeauty6921 6 років тому +1

    🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩

    • @raylaughlan5324
      @raylaughlan5324 4 роки тому

      Funny, but come on, that wasn’t necessary man

  • @satan6169
    @satan6169 6 років тому +2

    As a man who was physically and mentally abused by a female bpd sufferer all I can say to u is get help if u have bpd and if u are dating someone who has it run away as far as u can now.

    • @cynthiasynosch3259
      @cynthiasynosch3259 5 років тому +1

      Amen

    • @froggi3942
      @froggi3942 4 роки тому +8

      Yo it's totally fine that you got away from someone abusing you like, congrats, but it's not good or healthy to group all people with bpd together. Everyone deserves love.

    • @daisysummer514
      @daisysummer514 3 роки тому

      Ok, crybaby