WRITE THE BOOK!! The simple fact that you want to write one , the fact that you have the desire to write it, its the only reason why you should. I don’t want to write a book. Get me? Its your gift to the world 💖
I have ask what powder is your favorite for under eye and what loose powder is your favorite if you’re setting your entire face. Also what concealer did you use in this video? I definitely have aspects of imposter syndrome. I am afraid to put myself out there at all really because I am so afraid of failing. I think that stems from so much criticism when I was a kid. I actually just placed an order for a few new clothing item and one of them is a shirt that says the power of yet. I would look it up because I fell in love with it
I worked in a hosptal lab for 30 years. I moved to a position working to improve all areas of the healthcare system. So, I literally have to walk into a room full of doctors, nurses, or other leaders and help them with their work - when I know a small fraction of what their specialty does. It can be scary but I need to remember that my knowledge is different, not "less than".
Thanks for sharing your perspective. I am a biller & coder & sometimes I am nervous when I have to speak to physicians about documentation but I like what you said about my knowledge being different not lesser
As someone who's old enough to be your mom I have to say how much I appreciate when you do these very thoughtful videos. Your generation has plenty of challenges. Shining a light and sharing your experiences with these subjects, when you could just talk about makeup all day (not that there's anything wrong with that! 😉) shows what a mature young woman you are. I've been watching since you were teaching and yours is one of very few beauty channels I still spend time with. Keep up the good work and God bless. 😊❤️
I feel like such an imposter at work. I’m in a higher position than I feel I deserve. Any raise or promotion I get, I feel like my peers won’t think I deserve it. I simultaneously feel confident in my work and that I don’t know enough. This is so relatable.
I was putting off applying for a job because I’ve never worked in this field BUT I meet all of the qualifications listed.. finally applied this morning. This video speaks to me a lot.. thank you for posting!
I feel like such an imposter being a nurse. I work in outpatient oncology and I feel so inferior to my friends who do “the real work” in the ER and ICU. I worked in the NICU for less than a year and everyone was so shocked when I suddenly left. They were like “but you’re doing so well”, “you seem like you really love it”, and I was like AHA I fooled you! Jess, I totally felt you when you said “I’m the teacher”. I felt that way at my first job going into patients’ rooms like “Hi, I’m in charge of your care for the next 12 hours” and I look like you plucked me out of high school. I also can’t get my picture taken, especially fake candid photos. My friends get so frustrated with me when I get embarrassed and say I can’t do it
jess i love how you always talk about social anxiety and show and talk a lot about your introverted/shy traits yet you’ve had the most extroverted jobs on the planet. i love that about you. another note, imposter syndrome hits at work the most, even after i succeed over and over again. and at home i walk around my house thinking how did i make this happen? i’m too young/little to run my own household 😂
As a clinician in mental health, I see imposter syndrome as a clue to someone’s beliefs about themselves. If someone is suffering from anxiety, depression, PTSD and such, therapy can only go so far if the disordered belief system is not addressed. Belief systems develop through our whole lives, but start when we are kids. Even a “harmless” comment from our parents of “You always get good grades. You don’t cause me stress like your brother does” can have profound effects on a child’s belief system of “not being the trouble maker”. Family dynamics are so interesting and I loved taking the family therapy classes. I think all of us have a little bit of imposter syndrome going on. Even in my current job I sometimes look around and wonder who let me into my college programs and allowed me to graduate. Who signed off my clinical hours? Who thought it was a good idea for ME of all people to help others through their life struggles? Didn’t they all notice that I’m not good enough? But I’ve learned to challenge those disordered thoughts from my childhood and feel confident in my abilities but also humble enough to always want to learn more. ❤
In terms of causes, don't forget actual hard life experiences. Kids who are first generation in a country are often forced to perform high whether because of the culture they came from or because of a family expectation they will achieve high to carry the family as an adult or to make the previous generation's sacrifice to move there "worth it." Then, you have the kids who were in some way neglected: nobody at home could help them with homework, their emotional needs were neglected (so they learned they had to do it all themselves), they were forced to parent their parents or siblings (because of health or substance issues or because of cultural precedents that say the oldest/oldest girl's job is to be a second mother to their siblings), or their sibling was medically fragile leading to them having to "go it alone" as the unseen sibling. Then, you have the undiagnosed/late diagnosed neurodivergent people who spent their lives white-knuckling through everything; they feel like they have to figure out the unspoken rules of society while trying to do what feels almost impossible to them...while getting the message at home or from society in general that you don't ask for help and you don't make yourself a problem for others. The whole "make yourself small" and "avoid being a burden to society" messages that have been sent, especially to girls, play a role in this too. You're not supposed to get a big head when you do well, but you're also not supposed to have needs. Of course the "impostor syndrome" experience is so common!
I've been a dance teacher for 10 years and I still feel like an imposter at times. I'm in a wheelchair and I work at a studio where everyone is able bodied and got degrees in dance while I do not. On the one hand, It has led me to compare myself to the other teachers and put myself down because my choreography isn't as intricate as the other teachers. On the other hand, I'm showing people that there are different ways to move our bodies and you don't have to look a certain way to be a dancer.
I feel this a lot. I’m in a job that I honestly feel like I’m just winging it every day and I got all these people fooled into thinking I know what I am doing.
Jess please keep doing this series, I've learned so much from each of your videos and I always feel so seen. Thank you so so much for putting yourself out there 💜💜💜.
Loved the thoughtful reflection of this topic. One thing that I have been working on this past year, which relates to this, is to “get out of my own way.” Meaning, don’t let your own mind be the thing that stops you from getting started or disqualifies you from the job before you even apply. Make someone else deem you “unqualified.” Chances are, you’ll achieve more than you thought possible. On the other hand, I have come up short a couple times, so that means that I’ve had to become more comfortable with rejection. As a perfectionist and high-achiever, rejection was agonizing, but overtime, I’ve gotten more and more comfortable with it. I’ve even made a little game of trying to get rejected once a week. Usually something small, but it’s a good way to practice dealing with that emotion.
The teacher in you is showing!!!! As a 19 year veteran teacher- it is so obvious that make up alone does not satisfy your high intellect- so these videos are you true creative outlet!! That’s why I love your vids!! I think perfectionism comes from your childhood and how you were raised.
I am a licensed clinical mental health counselor. I practice CBT. With that said, I believe this is more of a thought d/o. In regard to the causes, the idea behind too much praise or too much criticism is the same concept for NPD. Essentially, that’s more of a universal concept. I believe it’s likely rooted in shame and/or low self-esteem, but that doesn’t explain why or how a person came to the point of carrying shame or having low esteem. So you have to go deeper. However, with someone looking for short-term therapy and faster results, I would have them “look at the facts.” When people are very set on holding onto a thought or belief, I ask them to come to session prepared to argue their case to me. They have to present each thought or belief and have evidence to prove this. Almost every time it ends in the person, laughing and deciding, I can’t argue this. And then we go, ok, then can you let it go? Can you stop believing this? Can you start telling this thought or belief this is not true? This is a lie! You are not renting space in my mind anymore and I am letting you go!
I’m in my 5th year of teaching and I definitely feel this sometimes. Especially when we go to professional development. Hearing from other teachers, how much they know, and how knowledgeable they sound makes me feel like I am not worthy enough for my job. But then, I see the growth in my students when I work with them, and I feel so proud of myself. It’s a mental rollercoaster for sure!
This video resonated so hard it brought tears to my eyes. I am a teacher and have been for 22 years, coming from a very pushy family constantly putting pressure on me to improve. Even now, things like performance management meetings fill me with such anxiety. I have an extremely challenging class this year and I feel like a failure that I haven’t mastered their behaviour because surely I should know what I’m doing after 22 years?! And I’m a soloist as asking for helping is the epitome of failure… (both in work and with my current mental health) thank you for voicing this x
You saying you dont really fit in with the rest of the youtube world YES i do get what you mean and thats exactly why ive been subscribed to your for 10 or so years! Because you are so genuine and real it comes across the screen. You arent trying to be better then everyone else you just show up as yourself and we love you for it! You are literally our online bestie! Haha love this series
I like your channel because you actually talk about life and you share your actual opinions and views on life, religion etc UA-camrs/influencers just talk crap most of the time killing your brain cells! And i think people are getting tired on this now. Videos like this one makes you actually think and you can learn something. Love all your videos.
This definitely speaks to my soul. I'm a combination of a perfectionist and a soloist. I went to Johns Hopkins business school and constantly felt like an imposter because my grade school teachers made me feel stupid - I was just extremely shy. What's worse is that a supposed "friend" I met at Johns Hopkins told me I don't deserve the things I have in my life (none of what she said was true or even my insecurities - those were hers). Also its none of my business what other people think of me. In any case, we all have insecurities, but that doesn't mean we don't deserve to be where we are. No one really talks about this, so thank you Jessica!
I needed to hear this message today. NEEDED! Thank you so much for making yourself vulnerable and making this video. You need to write the book and I need to make my move.
Me liking this video during the ad because I already know it’s going to be a good one!! These are my fave videos you do!!!! (But also I love all of your videos so no pressure to keep them coming or anything!)
I'm at the part of your video where you are talking about writing a book, and it really resonates with me. I wrote a children's book a couple years ago and decided this year that I want to be able to hold it and share it with my daughter, even if it gets zero sales. So I found an illustrator and actually received the author proofs this week. I want to share that I am immensely proud of myself for going through with it. If nobody else buys it, at least I will still be happy to own it and share it with my daughter. Recently, I saw a video where someone said "Embarrassment is the price you have to pay for greatness," and I want to hold onto that.
I work in logistics. I have a degree in supply chain management, and accounting. I have done this for almost 12 years. Still convinced someone is going to find out I'm a fraud.
Trust me, if you've spent that long working in logistics, your skills are REAL. If they weren't, you'd have been discovered well before your initial 3 months probation period ended and cut loose! You are a professional and highly capable. 💕
This was exactly what I needed to hear. I am going to be 37 in November and am going back to school to get my teaching degree in January. Talk about feeling behind, not good enough and questioning literally everything, including my sanity! You have to start somewhere, though. 🤷♀️ BUT that doesn't mean I'm not absolutely terrified!
Yes, that was me as a kid. Then I couldn’t compensate enough for my adhd. It comes from insecurity and in my case trauma as well. Add in Autism and not being able to predict how people will react and that makes you more anxious of people perceiving you anything other than competent. Thinking it’s just a matter of time until I will be found out and rejected for not being good enough or normal again. I am all of the above types. I am currently in autistic burnout from a job I quit a few months ago.
Thank you Jessica for your videos, you helped me get throught the pandemic and isolation times. I still love watching your videos! ♡ Love from Canada 🇨🇦/Québec
I work in the healthcare field within Psychiatry/ Mental Health. Imposter Syndrome, interestingly, impacts women on a much larger scale than men. Some of the research even shows that women will only apply for jobs where they meet 95-100% of the preferred qualifications, whereas men will apply even if they meet 0-5% of the requirements. Thank you for covering this one!
The aspect of wanting to see the end of the idea fully fleshed out before doing “the thing” made me think of the Bible verse from Psalm 199:105 “your word is a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path.” The lamps they would’ve been using then would have only been enough light to literally show -The next step. That’s it. So often I think we determine the “right” thing to do based on our perceived outcome that may or may not happen. Just an encouragement that only being able to see -The next step-is enough. Especially with the Lord 🫶🏽💗
I feel like I work in a company that actually promotes imposter syndrome in a way because it benefits them to keep you feeling like you’re not quite good enough, so that way they don’t need to promote you or compensate you properly. They give you just enough encouragement to keep you working there, but constantly make you feel like you could do better and that no matter what you achieve there’s more that you could or should be doing. I feel like this really messes with your confidence /self-esteem and even though I recognize it, it is very hard to get out of because it makes you feel like you can’t go to any other company because you’re not good enough, so therefore this mentality keeps you stuck in a company that is holding you back while benefiting from it. I also feel like this is something that probably affects women more so than men and I know that it has been shown that statistically, women will hold themselves back from things they can do because they don’t feel like they can be perfect at it where men will go for things that they are underqualified for without the same hesitation . I think this really plays into the industry that I work in because it has some very antiquated male dominated ego driven tendencies and it fuels that sense of imposter syndrome in those who aren’t running on ego. Thank you so much for sharing this topic, your thoughts and opening up a conversation about this - clearly this is very relevant in my life. 😊
absolutely!! I work in fintech on all male team (aside from me) and I feel like I'm constantly doubting myself despite having 8 years of experience. I also feel like the amount of 'fire drill' type tasks exacerbate this because you don't have time to work to the level that you want and eventually you feel like you'll never do good enough work..
@@laurenneely645 I am a designer at an architectural firm and the amount of work I have on my plate consistently is enough for 3 people to be full time so I never feel like I am doing a good job on anything because I am constantly bouncing from one thing to another on top of lacking confidence in my design work. I have had very little help over the years and my company actually told me that I am not good at delegating and am a perfectionist who won’t let others help (as a reason to bother promote me) while it has been them that has never allowed me to have any real help or junior staff to mentor….so yeah imposter syndrome mixed with unhealthy corporate mind games and a does of perfectionism can really make feeling positive about yourself a challenge!!!
Interesting chat today! So excited on your prospect of writing a book, go for it if that’s what your gut tells you I related to this deep dive, thank you!
I relate to you so much & that is why I love your videos. I found myself agreeing with everything & talking out loud to you in this video in particular. Thank you for always being so real & honest with us. Also, I would 100% buy your book 💖💖🫶🫶
I was not successful in school. Until I got to grad school. However I am very very successful in my career. I never had pressure on me academically so I've never suffered from imposter syndrome. I've always been super confident. I just buckle down until I do it.
I have a child who attends a gifted boarding high school. They talk a lot about imposter syndrome. The students were all the "smartest kids" in their classes. Now they are being challenged and are just "average" in their classes, because they are all gifted academically. The support staff help the students process this change.
The timing for this video is CRAZY. I just got back from a day of teaching (middle school). I had to teach electricity and electromagnetism today and WOW did I feel like an imposter. I certainly overprepared, and sadly it still was not good enough. I find it so challenging to be knowledgeable in all these different subjects (science, history, languages, math...). After 5 years, I still find it so difficult. I can really see myself being the "expert" category here! There has to be a point when enough is enough. I don't want to look back on my life and regret worrying so much. But then I feel like I owe my students to give them the best lessons.
Very vulnerable and informative video, great job! It would have been interesting if you explored the link between ADHD and imposter syndrome as well as neurodivergence in girls and women can manifest as anxiety, insecurity, overthinking, etc and is closely linked due to all the negative messages they get over time. Thanks for bringing light to this topic ❤😊
OMG!! This is me! I'm a teacher too but my worst time is Parent Teacher Conferences! I am convinced one of my parents is going to look at me as I'm talking about their kid and tell me "You have no idea what you are talking about!" I've been a teacher 29 years and I still expect this every time!! I too have always wanted to write a children's book but I don't because I feel like I know nothing about it. Wow!!! It's like you were talking directly to me! Everything you said rang true for me!! So interesting! Thank you for the insightful informative video! 😊
I feel this. I wanted to start my UA-cam channel 10yrs ago. Filmed several things and never uploaded it. Finally, I got to the point where I said nope I am gonna do it. I started my YT and TT last year and even though it's such a small channel I enjoy it.
Omg I quit my job after a burnout and always felt I wasn't good at my job, especially after (and despite) a promotion. This makes so much sense. Still trying to deal with it now as I feel like I'm not good at anything.
Hey Jess! Therapist and also imposter syndrome sufferer here. Loved this video. I think its also interesting that women are more prone to imposter syndrome than men. To me it speaks to an attachment thing both from what I've witnessed and experienced of "getting it right " or being "enough " which are also tied to anxiety. Treatments for this really would be exactly as you mentioned cognitive approaches to change our thinking around situations! Thanks for sharing your experience!
For me I started to see it as not imposter syndrome, but newbie nerves. We often get it when we start a new job and don't know everything that it entails, but over time you grow that confidence as you learn more. I start a new job in a few weeks and I feel like I'm at the stage of life where now I'm excited to learn new things this job will entail. People know you won't know everything when you start, just jump in and have fun!
I love this series, and I think it is so extremely important to talk about challenges like this we all face… and how to survive and even thrive despite, or maybe even because of them. I applaud you for starting conversations that enlighten, and ultimately help to empower us all 💗
I’ve never thought of myself as an imposter but oh my gosh, I relate to “the natural genius” so much. I feel far from a genius though; I actually feel like an idiot most of the time. Because school and activities came so naturally to me in adolescence, I feel so stupid or incompetent if I don’t instantly succeed now in my 20s. Being a “gifted child” really has been a challenging experience as an adult!
As a life-long perfectionist (at 60 years old), I’ve realized that sometimes it’s about the journey not the end result. We are meant to be life-long learners. It’s what keeps our brains active. That feeling of not knowing something just means we are challenging ourselves, growing and learning. Like you said about Genevieve, you praise the process not the end result. So write the dang book! Even if only for yourself…but I bet you your audience will be excited to read it too 🙋♀️
I just wanted you to know that you are still the only beauty content creator I watch but your vlogs are my favorites I think you're probably the only thing I do watch on UA-cam a few cooking channels but not many So if I'm watching UA-cam I'm watching you you've grown your channel into something that I thoroughly enjoy So continue making all the vlogs you want because I will continue to watch them thank you for your hard work
Oh man I totally relate to this topic - just spent 2 days in a working group meeting and questioning my abilities and why I was in the same room with everyone else. Write the book!
I suffer "Full Blown" from it! 42 years of teaching, singing, and acting. I never felt worthy of any of the compliments or praise. Ever! I never knew what it was. Even though I've been retired for 3 years, it helps to give it a name. Thank you, so much for bringing this to my attention. I love your videos!
I love the content of this series! But the most impressive thing is - you can powder your face and keep the words coming out as sentences that make perfect sense😂 good job! Love it❤❤
when you were saying about your kids growing up and time going fast It made me think of a song by Rush ‘time stand still’ Summer's going fast, nights growing colder Children growing up, old friends growing older Freeze this moment a little bit longer Make each sensation a little bit stronger Experience slips away Experience slips away The innocence slips away I think we can all relate
I could relate in a weird way. This gave me a lot to think about. Thank you for sharing this and being vulnerable enough to share and end up helping me in ways you don’t even know.
I relate so much to the thoughts you have. I don't think of myself as a fraud but often inadequate. I really Love this series ! I love hearing your thoughts because you have a good head open your shoulders. Your authenticity is very relatable and makes me feel seen.
I was a preschool teacher for 16 years and then a Nanny for 5 years. Now that I have my own daughter I sometimes feel imposter syndrome like “no really I promise I AM a mom, really!” It’s all I’ve ever wanted and it feels surreal sometimes.
Wow, Jessica. I really needed this video. Especially one coming from someone I’ve admired for years. I’ve known for years that I’ve suffered from Imposter Syndrome, and up until this very moment really thought I understood what it meant. But the research you discussed made me feel so much more understood. One day, I was thinking about it and felt it hard being a mom of 3. Am I doing any of this right??Then I thought harder and felt like a fraud of a violin player. Am I really even that good? (Been playing since I was 5) then a fraud of a nurse. Why should people listen to me? Am I simply just rehearsing what I’ve learned or do I really understand what I’m talking about? And finally it boiled down to a fraud of a HUMAN. Do I deserve to take up any space on this Earth? 😫 This video really helped me out. Made me cry, even! Cause I’m a perfectionist who excelled in school and now I question most everything and it’s exhausting. Thank you for making this a topic. It’s made me more interested in learning about it and coping with it! Face it till you make it. Love that. ❤
I resonate with this so much. I have been sewing for most of my life and hide most my projects bcecause of their imperfections. I sewed myself a dress a few weeks ago and when someone asked me what I did that week, I did not tell them about the dress I made. It had consumed most of my week and I worked so hard, but I didn’t want to draw attention to myself. Why am I unable to talk openly about my hobby?! Makes no sense. Lol
You just shared about your hobby with us (and it didn't hurt you). I'm impressed by your skills. I encourage you to start proudly sharing with others! 🧵 💕
Jess, I think this a great branching out and I am glad I caught it. I remember visiting my retired Aunt and she would say " the house is a mess". There might have been a magazine turned crooked on the table! She was always saying things like " these cookies are dry", when she was offering 4 different kinds of delicious home baked cookies she had in the freezer. She was Amazing as a homemaker, wife and mother, as well as a church memeber and food bank volunteer. There seemed to me that there was nothing she couldn't do. And I look back now and ask, was it due to never feeling that there was enough? Was it to be modest for apperances? Was she ever at peace and satisfied with her seemingly perfect life?Having her as my example of perfect womanhood, I never measure up. I have tried to let the perfectionism go and I try to accept the things I am good at. So often we are uncomfortable in our own skins and relaxing into self acceptance can alleviate many symptoms. And I strongly believe in a Doctors help if needed for anxiety and depression. Be well, Jess and thank you for sharing your research.
Jess I love this series you’re doing! I think being mindful about our lives is so incredibly important. And you should definitely write a book if you want to!!!! I’d read that so quick! ❤
I feel like it is lack of confidence and for me I think it is from a traumatic childhood, lack of love/support from parents. Im almost 48 and still working onbfeeling worthy of good things.
Jessica, as someone who was always good at school but struggled to feel like I was good enough while applying to grad school, and then throughout my adult life with my career, this video is so relatable! I wish we could just have a chat about this bc I resonated so much with everything you said. ❤❤❤
Just want to say how much this video helped me today. I see so much of myself in everything you said in the video, and hearing you put it into words felt so validating. PLEASE do write a book - I think we would all love it!
Jen, I noticed on Amazon, they have great L’Oréal Age Perfect Radient Serum Foundation in Rose Ivory in stock right now, $14.17. I know you love that shade as I do too.
The quiz may be broken 😂 I was rated much lower than what I thought I’d be, BUT I feel this in my bones. I work in a field, in an office with a lot of people much younger than me and I look at them, their independence, ability to take risks, etc and wonder why I can’t be more like them. Then, when I do get my chance, I’m scared to death to take it. Make it make sense!
I totally understand being good at something when you’re a kid and it being harder has an adult. I struggle with this now that I’m in college at 32 😂 it’s a hard thing to face and get over.
Yes to all of this. The thing is I think most people that suffer from imposter syndrome know that we suffer from imposter syndrome but think that we are perfectionists and are not good enough to not suffer from it. I’m a NICU nurse and I still constantly worry that parents will think that I’m not good enough to take care of their baby and fire me. Sometimes the fear of having such a tiny life in my care scares me. I’m working on it though and I’m now at the point in my career where younger nurses on my floor are coming to me for help. Helping them has actually helped me feel more confident and competent and validates my previous experience when they need help with similar things that I did when I was newer.
Hi Jess I feel you 😅 as an international pianist I know that it's very hard to understand and receive compliments. Thanks for talking about this subject, you're the best ! Much love to you and your dear family ❤❤❤
Teaching was this 100% for the first 10 years. And I also see this in my daughter who is a new mom - she questions her ability to be a good parent. I try to remind her that the fact that she is worried about it shows she cares and is doing great. Thanks for this!
Thanks for talking about this topic. This makes me realize that i have had imposter syndrome so badly in the last decade, in some times more severe than others. I have the imposter syndrome traits of the perfectionist, expert and natural genius, and you described it perfectly. I feel that no matter what i achieve its not something i celebrate internally, and proudly, but more felt the ‘ufff boy thats over with, i survived, i did it, and nobody knows i still feel like i still dont measure up or are criticizing myself. In hindsight, i was always the top grade in my classes, but as a CPA, attorney and notary public, i have struggled so much with imposter syndrome in my job in the corporate legal field. It has led me to burnout and anxiety definitely. There is this constant feeling that i would never know enough and could get fired or be exposed at any time, even though my bosses praise me alot. Its a struggle, specially since i work with people that have 15 years of experience in the industry and i am just in my first year. But at the same time deep down i know that it hasnt hold me back from pursuing what I want and helps me have attention to detail and excel, but it shouldn’t be at the expense of our joy. Also I tend to get overwhelmed thinking of new things and dreams because i struggle with this in my job and don’t want to feel like this in other areas. I believe that pushing through and facing it till you make it is the approach i have taken, and it works but sometimes it creeps back in. I have been practicing doing things imperfectly even though i know deep down i did the best of my ability at that momento but ignore the voice and do only the best i can but without over preparing and being ok with it no matter the result. Not letting the imposter thoughts win. It has worked a lot too.
I totally relate to this! I’ve been in my field for almost 17 yrs, but I changed jobs about 2 yrs ago and I still feel like I only know enough to just get by. My supervisor even moved me to a harder position about 6 months in and I almost didn’t want to take it. I was like, “do you think I can do it?”. 😂 Some days I think I sound so stupid in meetings, but they haven’t fired me yet, so I must be doing ok! lol
I’ll be one of the first to pre-order your book! Keep writing girl! It’s a dream for me too, and hearing it is for you gives me encouragement. ✨ As always, absolutely loving this series. Thank you for all of the helpful insights 💕
Maybe the teeniest bit of imposter syndrome in its best way is actually humility. It’s all about balance I guess. I mean, have you ever encountered someone who might actually have benefited from realizing they are not qualified? Have you ever had someone, say a boss, for example, who very much should not have held a position of power and yet here they are? Someone who is under prepared, under qualified and yet holds great sway over a situation? It can be awful for everyone around them!
WRITE THE BOOK!! The simple fact that you want to write one , the fact that you have the desire to write it, its the only reason why you should. I don’t want to write a book. Get me? Its your gift to the world 💖
I squealed hearing that!!! I hope she does write a book ❤ I’m so intrigued on what genre it’d be and the topic
I have ask what powder is your favorite for under eye and what loose powder is your favorite if you’re setting your entire face. Also what concealer did you use in this video? I definitely have aspects of imposter syndrome. I am afraid to put myself out there at all really because I am so afraid of failing. I think that stems from so much criticism when I was a kid. I actually just placed an order for a few new clothing item and one of them is a shirt that says the power of yet. I would look it up because I fell in love with it
Yes, Jessica, just write your book. Don’t let anything stop you. Just go for it!
I worked in a hosptal lab for 30 years. I moved to a position working to improve all areas of the healthcare system. So, I literally have to walk into a room full of doctors, nurses, or other leaders and help them with their work - when I know a small fraction of what their specialty does. It can be scary but I need to remember that my knowledge is different, not "less than".
Thanks for sharing your perspective. I am a biller & coder & sometimes I am nervous when I have to speak to physicians about documentation but I like what you said about my knowledge being different not lesser
As someone who's old enough to be your mom I have to say how much I appreciate when you do these very thoughtful videos. Your generation has plenty of challenges. Shining a light and sharing your experiences with these subjects, when you could just talk about makeup all day (not that there's anything wrong with that! 😉) shows what a mature young woman you are.
I've been watching since you were teaching and yours is one of very few beauty channels I still spend time with.
Keep up the good work and God bless. 😊❤️
I feel like such an imposter at work. I’m in a higher position than I feel I deserve. Any raise or promotion I get, I feel like my peers won’t think I deserve it. I simultaneously feel confident in my work and that I don’t know enough. This is so relatable.
Wow literally how I feel at work as well.
I was putting off applying for a job because I’ve never worked in this field BUT I meet all of the qualifications listed.. finally applied this morning.
This video speaks to me a lot.. thank you for posting!
Librarian here who's been watching for........9 years. I would be so excited to see a book with your name!!
I feel like such an imposter being a nurse. I work in outpatient oncology and I feel so inferior to my friends who do “the real work” in the ER and ICU. I worked in the NICU for less than a year and everyone was so shocked when I suddenly left. They were like “but you’re doing so well”, “you seem like you really love it”, and I was like AHA I fooled you! Jess, I totally felt you when you said “I’m the teacher”. I felt that way at my first job going into patients’ rooms like “Hi, I’m in charge of your care for the next 12 hours” and I look like you plucked me out of high school. I also can’t get my picture taken, especially fake candid photos. My friends get so frustrated with me when I get embarrassed and say I can’t do it
jess i love how you always talk about social anxiety and show and talk a lot about your introverted/shy traits yet you’ve had the most extroverted jobs on the planet. i love that about you. another note, imposter syndrome hits at work the most, even after i succeed over and over again. and at home i walk around my house thinking how did i make this happen? i’m too young/little to run my own household 😂
As a clinician in mental health, I see imposter syndrome as a clue to someone’s beliefs about themselves. If someone is suffering from anxiety, depression, PTSD and such, therapy can only go so far if the disordered belief system is not addressed. Belief systems develop through our whole lives, but start when we are kids. Even a “harmless” comment from our parents of “You always get good grades. You don’t cause me stress like your brother does” can have profound effects on a child’s belief system of “not being the trouble maker”. Family dynamics are so interesting and I loved taking the family therapy classes.
I think all of us have a little bit of imposter syndrome going on. Even in my current job I sometimes look around and wonder who let me into my college programs and allowed me to graduate. Who signed off my clinical hours? Who thought it was a good idea for ME of all people to help others through their life struggles? Didn’t they all notice that I’m not good enough?
But I’ve learned to challenge those disordered thoughts from my childhood and feel confident in my abilities but also humble enough to always want to learn more. ❤
I love these deep dive discussions! It’s helpful to talk about subjects you care about. I think we can all grow from these conversations
Jessica is can listen to you talk for hours! Girl im so thankful to have found you in this you tube world ❤
In terms of causes, don't forget actual hard life experiences. Kids who are first generation in a country are often forced to perform high whether because of the culture they came from or because of a family expectation they will achieve high to carry the family as an adult or to make the previous generation's sacrifice to move there "worth it." Then, you have the kids who were in some way neglected: nobody at home could help them with homework, their emotional needs were neglected (so they learned they had to do it all themselves), they were forced to parent their parents or siblings (because of health or substance issues or because of cultural precedents that say the oldest/oldest girl's job is to be a second mother to their siblings), or their sibling was medically fragile leading to them having to "go it alone" as the unseen sibling. Then, you have the undiagnosed/late diagnosed neurodivergent people who spent their lives white-knuckling through everything; they feel like they have to figure out the unspoken rules of society while trying to do what feels almost impossible to them...while getting the message at home or from society in general that you don't ask for help and you don't make yourself a problem for others. The whole "make yourself small" and "avoid being a burden to society" messages that have been sent, especially to girls, play a role in this too. You're not supposed to get a big head when you do well, but you're also not supposed to have needs. Of course the "impostor syndrome" experience is so common!
I've been a dance teacher for 10 years and I still feel like an imposter at times. I'm in a wheelchair and I work at a studio where everyone is able bodied and got degrees in dance while I do not. On the one hand, It has led me to compare myself to the other teachers and put myself down because my choreography isn't as intricate as the other teachers. On the other hand, I'm showing people that there are different ways to move our bodies and you don't have to look a certain way to be a dancer.
I feel this a lot. I’m in a job that I honestly feel like I’m just winging it every day and I got all these people fooled into thinking I know what I am doing.
Jess please keep doing this series, I've learned so much from each of your videos and I always feel so seen. Thank you so so much for putting yourself out there 💜💜💜.
Loved the thoughtful reflection of this topic. One thing that I have been working on this past year, which relates to this, is to “get out of my own way.” Meaning, don’t let your own mind be the thing that stops you from getting started or disqualifies you from the job before you even apply. Make someone else deem you “unqualified.” Chances are, you’ll achieve more than you thought possible. On the other hand, I have come up short a couple times, so that means that I’ve had to become more comfortable with rejection. As a perfectionist and high-achiever, rejection was agonizing, but overtime, I’ve gotten more and more comfortable with it. I’ve even made a little game of trying to get rejected once a week. Usually something small, but it’s a good way to practice dealing with that emotion.
The teacher in you is showing!!!! As a 19 year veteran teacher- it is so obvious that make up alone does not satisfy your high intellect- so these videos are you true creative outlet!! That’s why I love your vids!! I think perfectionism comes from your childhood and how you were raised.
I am a licensed clinical mental health counselor. I practice CBT. With that said, I believe this is more of a thought d/o. In regard to the causes, the idea behind too much praise or too much criticism is the same concept for NPD. Essentially, that’s more of a universal concept. I believe it’s likely rooted in shame and/or low self-esteem, but that doesn’t explain why or how a person came to the point of carrying shame or having low esteem. So you have to go deeper. However, with someone looking for short-term therapy and faster results, I would have them “look at the facts.” When people are very set on holding onto a thought or belief, I ask them to come to session prepared to argue their case to me. They have to present each thought or belief and have evidence to prove this. Almost every time it ends in the person, laughing and deciding, I can’t argue this. And then we go, ok, then can you let it go? Can you stop believing this? Can you start telling this thought or belief this is not true? This is a lie! You are not renting space in my mind anymore and I am letting you go!
I’m in my 5th year of teaching and I definitely feel this sometimes. Especially when we go to professional development. Hearing from other teachers, how much they know, and how knowledgeable they sound makes me feel like I am not worthy enough for my job. But then, I see the growth in my students when I work with them, and I feel so proud of myself. It’s a mental rollercoaster for sure!
‘Why NOT me?’ has helped me so much since watching this video!! Thank you!!
Thank you so much for this video, you don’t know how helpful it all was to hear. ❤
This video resonated so hard it brought tears to my eyes. I am a teacher and have been for 22 years, coming from a very pushy family constantly putting pressure on me to improve. Even now, things like performance management meetings fill me with such anxiety. I have an extremely challenging class this year and I feel like a failure that I haven’t mastered their behaviour because surely I should know what I’m doing after 22 years?! And I’m a soloist as asking for helping is the epitome of failure… (both in work and with my current mental health) thank you for voicing this x
I really enjoyed this talk. Very enlightening. Thanks Jess! 😊
You saying you dont really fit in with the rest of the youtube world YES i do get what you mean and thats exactly why ive been subscribed to your for 10 or so years! Because you are so genuine and real it comes across the screen. You arent trying to be better then everyone else you just show up as yourself and we love you for it! You are literally our online bestie! Haha love this series
I like your channel because you actually talk about life and you share your actual opinions and views on life, religion etc
UA-camrs/influencers just talk crap most of the time killing your brain cells! And i think people are getting tired on this now. Videos like this one makes you actually think and you can learn something. Love all your videos.
This definitely speaks to my soul. I'm a combination of a perfectionist and a soloist. I went to Johns Hopkins business school and constantly felt like an imposter because my grade school teachers made me feel stupid - I was just extremely shy. What's worse is that a supposed "friend" I met at Johns Hopkins told me I don't deserve the things I have in my life (none of what she said was true or even my insecurities - those were hers). Also its none of my business what other people think of me. In any case, we all have insecurities, but that doesn't mean we don't deserve to be where we are. No one really talks about this, so thank you Jessica!
I needed to hear this message today. NEEDED! Thank you so much for making yourself vulnerable and making this video. You need to write the book and I need to make my move.
Me liking this video during the ad because I already know it’s going to be a good one!! These are my fave videos you do!!!! (But also I love all of your videos so no pressure to keep them coming or anything!)
This rang so true for me, such an interesting topic ❤❤❤❤
Thank you for this, Jessica
I'm at the part of your video where you are talking about writing a book, and it really resonates with me. I wrote a children's book a couple years ago and decided this year that I want to be able to hold it and share it with my daughter, even if it gets zero sales. So I found an illustrator and actually received the author proofs this week. I want to share that I am immensely proud of myself for going through with it.
If nobody else buys it, at least I will still be happy to own it and share it with my daughter.
Recently, I saw a video where someone said "Embarrassment is the price you have to pay for greatness," and I want to hold onto that.
Really appreciated this video. There are so many points that I can relate to. This is a constant life battle though :(
⭐️another very well put together video that I didn’t know I needed until I saw it. ❤
Growing up is a big thing as well. The difference between 20 and 30 is truly, I feel, the biggest leap in adult life
I work in logistics. I have a degree in supply chain management, and accounting. I have done this for almost 12 years.
Still convinced someone is going to find out I'm a fraud.
Trust me, if you've spent that long working in logistics, your skills are REAL. If they weren't, you'd have been discovered well before your initial 3 months probation period ended and cut loose! You are a professional and highly capable. 💕
This was exactly what I needed to hear. I am going to be 37 in November and am going back to school to get my teaching degree in January. Talk about feeling behind, not good enough and questioning literally everything, including my sanity! You have to start somewhere, though. 🤷♀️ BUT that doesn't mean I'm not absolutely terrified!
Yes, that was me as a kid. Then I couldn’t compensate enough for my adhd. It comes from insecurity and in my case trauma as well. Add in Autism and not being able to predict how people will react and that makes you more anxious of people perceiving you anything other than competent. Thinking it’s just a matter of time until I will be found out and rejected for not being good enough or normal again. I am all of the above types. I am currently in autistic burnout from a job I quit a few months ago.
Thank you Jessica for your videos, you helped me get throught the pandemic and isolation times. I still love watching your videos! ♡ Love from Canada 🇨🇦/Québec
I work in the healthcare field within Psychiatry/ Mental Health. Imposter Syndrome, interestingly, impacts women on a much larger scale than men. Some of the research even shows that women will only apply for jobs where they meet 95-100% of the preferred qualifications, whereas men will apply even if they meet 0-5% of the requirements. Thank you for covering this one!
The aspect of wanting to see the end of the idea fully fleshed out before doing “the thing” made me think of the Bible verse from Psalm 199:105 “your word is a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path.”
The lamps they would’ve been using then would have only been enough light to literally show -The next step. That’s it. So often I think we determine the “right” thing to do based on our perceived outcome that may or may not happen. Just an encouragement that only being able to see -The next step-is enough. Especially with the Lord 🫶🏽💗
I feel like I work in a company that actually promotes imposter syndrome in a way because it benefits them to keep you feeling like you’re not quite good enough, so that way they don’t need to promote you or compensate you properly. They give you just enough encouragement to keep you working there, but constantly make you feel like you could do better and that no matter what you achieve there’s more that you could or should be doing. I feel like this really messes with your confidence /self-esteem and even though I recognize it, it is very hard to get out of because it makes you feel like you can’t go to any other company because you’re not good enough, so therefore this mentality keeps you stuck in a company that is holding you back while benefiting from it. I also feel like this is something that probably affects women more so than men and I know that it has been shown that statistically, women will hold themselves back from things they can do because they don’t feel like they can be perfect at it where men will go for things that they are underqualified for without the same hesitation . I think this really plays into the industry that I work in because it has some very antiquated male dominated ego driven tendencies and it fuels that sense of imposter syndrome in those who aren’t running on ego. Thank you so much for sharing this topic, your thoughts and opening up a conversation about this - clearly this is very relevant in my life. 😊
absolutely!! I work in fintech on all male team (aside from me) and I feel like I'm constantly doubting myself despite having 8 years of experience. I also feel like the amount of 'fire drill' type tasks exacerbate this because you don't have time to work to the level that you want and eventually you feel like you'll never do good enough work..
@@laurenneely645 I am a designer at an architectural firm and the amount of work I have on my plate consistently is enough for 3 people to be full time so I never feel like I am doing a good job on anything because I am constantly bouncing from one thing to another on top of lacking confidence in my design work. I have had very little help over the years and my company actually told me that I am not good at delegating and am a perfectionist who won’t let others help (as a reason to bother promote me) while it has been them that has never allowed me to have any real help or junior staff to mentor….so yeah imposter syndrome mixed with unhealthy corporate mind games and a does of perfectionism can really make feeling positive about yourself a challenge!!!
Interesting chat today! So excited on your prospect of writing a book, go for it if that’s what your gut tells you I related to this deep dive, thank you!
I relate to you so much & that is why I love your videos. I found myself agreeing with everything & talking out loud to you in this video in particular. Thank you for always being so real & honest with us. Also, I would 100% buy your book 💖💖🫶🫶
I was not successful in school. Until I got to grad school. However I am very very successful in my career. I never had pressure on me academically so I've never suffered from imposter syndrome. I've always been super confident. I just buckle down until I do it.
Great video. Love your humility and the way you deep dive into things and talk it out.
I have a child who attends a gifted boarding high school. They talk a lot about imposter syndrome. The students were all the "smartest kids" in their classes. Now they are being challenged and are just "average" in their classes, because they are all gifted academically. The support staff help the students process this change.
Loving this series you’re doing, so many interesting topics 😄💖
I loved this so much Jess, thank you! Please keep doing this series! ❤
You could turn this series into a podcast. These are the types of things that would be a wonderful listen in the car!
Love this series. I definitely struggle with imposter syndrome. It’s a nice reminder I’m not alone.
And please WRITE THE BOOK 🧡💙
The timing for this video is CRAZY. I just got back from a day of teaching (middle school). I had to teach electricity and electromagnetism today and WOW did I feel like an imposter. I certainly overprepared, and sadly it still was not good enough. I find it so challenging to be knowledgeable in all these different subjects (science, history, languages, math...). After 5 years, I still find it so difficult. I can really see myself being the "expert" category here! There has to be a point when enough is enough. I don't want to look back on my life and regret worrying so much. But then I feel like I owe my students to give them the best lessons.
Very vulnerable and informative video, great job! It would have been interesting if you explored the link between ADHD and imposter syndrome as well as neurodivergence in girls and women can manifest as anxiety, insecurity, overthinking, etc and is closely linked due to all the negative messages they get over time. Thanks for bringing light to this topic ❤😊
OMG!! This is me! I'm a teacher too but my worst time is Parent Teacher Conferences! I am convinced one of my parents is going to look at me as I'm talking about their kid and tell me "You have no idea what you are talking about!" I've been a teacher 29 years and I still expect this every time!! I too have always wanted to write a children's book but I don't because I feel like I know nothing about it. Wow!!! It's like you were talking directly to me! Everything you said rang true for me!! So interesting! Thank you for the insightful informative video! 😊
I feel this. I wanted to start my UA-cam channel 10yrs ago. Filmed several things and never uploaded it. Finally, I got to the point where I said nope I am gonna do it. I started my YT and TT last year and even though it's such a small channel I enjoy it.
I relate to the photo taking! Please do it! Photographers do it all day and know how to make you feel comfortable ❤
I love these deep dive topic videos you do, Jess! Thank you and God bless!
I feel so seen. Watching this was like releasing a big breath that I’ve been holding for decades. Thank you, Jess. You are such a blessing 🙏🏼
Omg I quit my job after a burnout and always felt I wasn't good at my job, especially after (and despite) a promotion. This makes so much sense. Still trying to deal with it now as I feel like I'm not good at anything.
Hey Jess! Therapist and also imposter syndrome sufferer here. Loved this video. I think its also interesting that women are more prone to imposter syndrome than men. To me it speaks to an attachment thing both from what I've witnessed and experienced of "getting it right " or being "enough " which are also tied to anxiety. Treatments for this really would be exactly as you mentioned cognitive approaches to change our thinking around situations! Thanks for sharing your experience!
I was just sitting here wondering, do I know any guys that would have this. I think no! 😊
@@alamryfarms754 I don't know the statistic off hand but it's a very small percentage of men who suffer from this compared to women
We can’t wait for your book!!! This was one of my favorite videos. Love your take on this common and not talked about enough subject. Thank you Jess!!
For me I started to see it as not imposter syndrome, but newbie nerves. We often get it when we start a new job and don't know everything that it entails, but over time you grow that confidence as you learn more. I start a new job in a few weeks and I feel like I'm at the stage of life where now I'm excited to learn new things this job will entail. People know you won't know everything when you start, just jump in and have fun!
Love this series Jessica😊
Insecurity, self-doubt. Comparison is the culprit. Just be you and be happy with your accomplishments.
I love this series, and I think it is so extremely important to talk about challenges like this we all face… and how to survive and even thrive despite, or maybe even because of them. I applaud you for starting conversations that enlighten, and ultimately help to empower us all 💗
This whole video was seriously eye opening for me!
I’ve never thought of myself as an imposter but oh my gosh, I relate to “the natural genius” so much. I feel far from a genius though; I actually feel like an idiot most of the time. Because school and activities came so naturally to me in adolescence, I feel so stupid or incompetent if I don’t instantly succeed now in my 20s. Being a “gifted child” really has been a challenging experience as an adult!
As a life-long perfectionist (at 60 years old), I’ve realized that sometimes it’s about the journey not the end result. We are meant to be life-long learners. It’s what keeps our brains active. That feeling of not knowing something just means we are challenging ourselves, growing and learning. Like you said about Genevieve, you praise the process not the end result. So write the dang book! Even if only for yourself…but I bet you your audience will be excited to read it too 🙋♀️
I just wanted you to know that you are still the only beauty content creator I watch but your vlogs are my favorites I think you're probably the only thing I do watch on UA-cam a few cooking channels but not many So if I'm watching UA-cam I'm watching you you've grown your channel into something that I thoroughly enjoy So continue making all the vlogs you want because I will continue to watch them thank you for your hard work
Oh man I totally relate to this topic - just spent 2 days in a working group meeting and questioning my abilities and why I was in the same room with everyone else. Write the book!
I suffer "Full Blown" from it! 42 years of teaching, singing, and acting. I never felt worthy of any of the compliments or praise. Ever! I never knew what it was. Even though I've been retired for 3 years, it helps to give it a name. Thank you, so much for bringing this to my attention. I love your videos!
I love the content of this series! But the most impressive thing is - you can powder your face and keep the words coming out as sentences that make perfect sense😂 good job! Love it❤❤
when you were saying about your kids growing up and time going fast It made me think of a song by Rush ‘time stand still’
Summer's going fast, nights growing colder
Children growing up, old friends growing older
Freeze this moment a little bit longer
Make each sensation a little bit stronger
Experience slips away
Experience slips away
The innocence slips away
I think we can all relate
I could relate in a weird way. This gave me a lot to think about. Thank you for sharing this and being vulnerable enough to share and end up helping me in ways you don’t even know.
I relate so much to the thoughts you have. I don't think of myself as a fraud but often inadequate. I really Love this series ! I love hearing your thoughts because you have a good head open your shoulders. Your authenticity is very relatable and makes me feel seen.
I was a preschool teacher for 16 years and then a Nanny for 5 years. Now that I have my own daughter I sometimes feel imposter syndrome like “no really I promise I AM a mom, really!” It’s all I’ve ever wanted and it feels surreal sometimes.
I’ve legitimately written a poem talking about how much I feel like an imposter in all aspects of my life.
Wow, Jessica. I really needed this video. Especially one coming from someone I’ve admired for years. I’ve known for years that I’ve suffered from Imposter Syndrome, and up until this very moment really thought I understood what it meant. But the research you discussed made me feel so much more understood.
One day, I was thinking about it and felt it hard being a mom of 3. Am I doing any of this right??Then I thought harder and felt like a fraud of a violin player.
Am I really even that good? (Been playing since I was 5) then a fraud of a nurse. Why should people listen to me? Am I simply just rehearsing what I’ve learned or do I really understand what I’m talking about? And finally it boiled down to a fraud of a HUMAN. Do I deserve to take up any space on this Earth? 😫
This video really helped me out. Made me cry, even! Cause I’m a perfectionist who excelled in school and now I question most everything and it’s exhausting.
Thank you for making this a topic. It’s made me more interested in learning about it and coping with it!
Face it till you make it. Love that. ❤
I am loving there “real” videos Jess! Great job! Love you❤
Oh my word! I love this so much! Thank you so much for what you shared and all of the little points as well. So timely!🎉❤
I resonate with this so much. I have been sewing for most of my life and hide most my projects bcecause of their imperfections. I sewed myself a dress a few weeks ago and when someone asked me what I did that week, I did not tell them about the dress I made. It had consumed most of my week and I worked so hard, but I didn’t want to draw attention to myself. Why am I unable to talk openly about my hobby?! Makes no sense. Lol
You just shared about your hobby with us (and it didn't hurt you). I'm impressed by your skills. I encourage you to start proudly sharing with others! 🧵 💕
Thanks for this video...I related 100%❤
Jess, I think this a great branching out and I am glad I caught it. I remember visiting my retired Aunt and she would say " the house is a mess". There might have been a magazine turned crooked on the table! She was always saying things like " these cookies are dry", when she was offering 4 different kinds of delicious home baked cookies she had in the freezer. She was Amazing as a homemaker, wife and mother, as well as a church memeber and food bank volunteer. There seemed to me that there was nothing she couldn't do.
And I look back now and ask, was it due to never feeling that there was enough? Was it to be modest for apperances? Was she ever at peace and satisfied with her seemingly perfect life?Having her as my example of perfect womanhood, I never measure up. I have tried to let the perfectionism go and I try to accept the things I am good at. So often we are uncomfortable in our own skins and relaxing into self acceptance can alleviate many symptoms. And I strongly believe in a Doctors help if needed for anxiety and depression. Be well, Jess and thank you for sharing your research.
Jess I love this series you’re doing! I think being mindful about our lives is so incredibly important. And you should definitely write a book if you want to!!!! I’d read that so quick! ❤
I feel like it is lack of confidence and for me I think it is from a traumatic childhood, lack of love/support from parents. Im almost 48 and still working onbfeeling worthy of good things.
Jessica, as someone who was always good at school but struggled to feel like I was good enough while applying to grad school, and then throughout my adult life with my career, this video is so relatable! I wish we could just have a chat about this bc I resonated so much with everything you said. ❤❤❤
Just want to say how much this video helped me today. I see so much of myself in everything you said in the video, and hearing you put it into words felt so validating. PLEASE do write a book - I think we would all love it!
Jen, I noticed on Amazon, they have great
L’Oréal Age Perfect Radient Serum Foundation in Rose Ivory in stock right now, $14.17. I know you love that shade as I do too.
Had that when I took my first child home from the hospital 21 years ago. I was like "Don't make it seem like you don't have a clue what you are doing"
The quiz may be broken 😂 I was rated much lower than what I thought I’d be, BUT I feel this in my bones. I work in a field, in an office with a lot of people much younger than me and I look at them, their independence, ability to take risks, etc and wonder why I can’t be more like them. Then, when I do get my chance, I’m scared to death to take it. Make it make sense!
This was a great Getting Real video, can definitely relate. Just glad to hear I’m not the only one who thinks like this. Thank-you 🙏🏻
I totally understand being good at something when you’re a kid and it being harder has an adult. I struggle with this now that I’m in college at 32 😂 it’s a hard thing to face and get over.
Yes to all of this. The thing is I think most people that suffer from imposter syndrome know that we suffer from imposter syndrome but think that we are perfectionists and are not good enough to not suffer from it.
I’m a NICU nurse and I still constantly worry that parents will think that I’m not good enough to take care of their baby and fire me. Sometimes the fear of having such a tiny life in my care scares me. I’m working on it though and I’m now at the point in my career where younger nurses on my floor are coming to me for help. Helping them has actually helped me feel more confident and competent and validates my previous experience when they need help with similar things that I did when I was newer.
Hi Jess I feel you 😅 as an international pianist I know that it's very hard to understand and receive compliments. Thanks for talking about this subject, you're the best ! Much love to you and your dear family ❤❤❤
Teaching was this 100% for the first 10 years. And I also see this in my daughter who is a new mom - she questions her ability to be a good parent. I try to remind her that the fact that she is worried about it shows she cares and is doing great. Thanks for this!
I love that you covered this and I needed it so much! Thank you 🙏🏽
Thanks for talking about this topic. This makes me realize that i have had imposter syndrome so badly in the last decade, in some times more severe than others. I have the imposter syndrome traits of the perfectionist, expert and natural genius, and you described it perfectly. I feel that no matter what i achieve its not something i celebrate internally, and proudly, but more felt the ‘ufff boy thats over with, i survived, i did it, and nobody knows i still feel like i still dont measure up or are criticizing myself. In hindsight, i was always the top grade in my classes, but as a CPA, attorney and notary public, i have struggled so much with imposter syndrome in my job in the corporate legal field. It has led me to burnout and anxiety definitely. There is this constant feeling that i would never know enough and could get fired or be exposed at any time, even though my bosses praise me alot. Its a struggle, specially since i work with people that have 15 years of experience in the industry and i am just in my first year. But at the same time deep down i know that it hasnt hold me back from pursuing what I want and helps me have attention to detail and excel, but it shouldn’t be at the expense of our joy. Also I tend to get overwhelmed thinking of new things and dreams because i struggle with this in my job and don’t want to feel like this in other areas. I believe that pushing through and facing it till you make it is the approach i have taken, and it works but sometimes it creeps back in. I have been practicing doing things imperfectly even though i know deep down i did the best of my ability at that momento but ignore the voice and do only the best i can but without over preparing and being ok with it no matter the result. Not letting the imposter thoughts win. It has worked a lot too.
I totally relate to this! I’ve been in my field for almost 17 yrs, but I changed jobs about 2 yrs ago and I still feel like I only know enough to just get by. My supervisor even moved me to a harder position about 6 months in and I almost didn’t want to take it. I was like, “do you think I can do it?”. 😂 Some days I think I sound so stupid in meetings, but they haven’t fired me yet, so I must be doing ok! lol
I’ll be one of the first to pre-order your book! Keep writing girl! It’s a dream for me too, and hearing it is for you gives me encouragement. ✨
As always, absolutely loving this series. Thank you for all of the helpful insights 💕
Jess you overthink everything. Remember at the end of the day it’s what matters to you no one else.❤
Maybe the teeniest bit of imposter syndrome in its best way is actually humility. It’s all about balance I guess. I mean, have you ever encountered someone who might actually have benefited from realizing they are not qualified? Have you ever had someone, say a boss, for example, who very much should not have held a position of power and yet here they are? Someone who is under prepared, under qualified and yet holds great sway over a situation? It can be awful for everyone around them!
Haha I commented before seeing the very end 😂
Good thing that you talk about thing like that ! Love fashion, food and beauty....and psychology !