Successful Blended Families | Marriage Today | Jimmy Evans, Karen Evans, Ron Deal
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- Опубліковано 13 тра 2012
- Parenting is hard enough, but if you're a step-family there are additional challenges. Blended family expert Ron Deal shares his insights on creating a successful step-family.
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My stepdad was HEAVEN SENT! He was a friend to my brother and I and always fair, he brought fun to our home, and
loved us and brought stability to our family ...that was way back in the 70s ...He is in heaven now, but gosh I miss him so much,
his kindness and patience made my childhood so HAPPY .......Stepfathers shouldn't try and take over as boss, but just love those kids, thats your job and everything will turn out GREAT!
He mentions early that the natural parent may be soft but then says that the discipline has to come from the natural parent, it becomes hard when that natural parent has been the softy good cop for time and then blame may come to the step parent from the child - hey you never cared before but now you're with him/her now you do. Would love to know how to get over that hurdle.
Just recently came across this man because of my Bible app. He definitely hits my feelings right on the head about being the outsider. It's so hard emotionally being the step-parent and keeping that marriage healthy. Love my Bible app.
I hear you. It is sometimes intensely tough
This is my exact situation currently... I’m done though.... tired of the tug of war... just best to move on...just don’t have the energy... they both manipulate each other... make excuses etc... her hormones are raging... what does that have to do with being a constant brat!!!
Sure it is hard being in a blended family. But it is do-a-ble. It i very important during the dating process to make every effort to pay attention to your soon to be spouse during conflict with your or their children to see how issues are handled. Then you will have an idea of what you may be marrying into.
why didn't I learn this sooner..
I agree with most of what is said, but you don't EVER EVER badmouth the biological parent-especially in front of the kids. Respect goes both ways and if the stepparent lies to the biological parent about what the child is doing, you have a major problem. A couple who is thinking of marrying with kids from a previous marriage should get counselling, not enter into the marriage selfishly, and try to treat the spouses's children as if they were their own sticking to it.
The Phantom Philosopher, You insinuate that all natural fathers are deadbeats. This is simply not true. I am a natural father who's wife divorced me due to her getting involved with a High School flame on Facebook after 9 years of marriage. I love my children, I never wanted to be away from them. I didn't get a choice. Now I have to live with the fact that a man who left his wife to be with my wife is now involved with my kids more that I am. Again I don't get a choice because the court gave her physical custody and she moved them far away from me knowing that by the time it made it to court she would be established where she is and the court would not make her come back. This situation makes be bristle at all step parents but I know that they are not all to blame. I am sorry that you feel challenged, Maybe you could try to change your attitude and just be thankful that you have the chance to be involved.
Hang in there Chris. Stay focused on this. You have to figure out how to be the best positive piece in a larger puzzle now. Your piece matters more than you know! Stay in prayer for the other people, and dig in to make your family a success. Now that there are step-parents, they have become family as well. I know that is tough to grasp. You're not alone. Remember, there are others of us out here trying to win successful families also, so keep your head up and focused on the ever-growing family. "Lord, I pray victory over Chris and his extended family right now. Amen."
If you can move to live closer to your children, that will help. Stay positive always. ♥️
Just another reason God hates divorce and remarriage. What a mess
Amen! God never intended for a married couple to divorce. Statics show blended families have a much greater chance of divorce than a traditional family have.
Which is why it is important to marry who you are evenly yoked with/helpmeet.
@@crystalbishop6971 You people have no idea, so much judgment, my mum and dad fought like cat and dog and they split...... I thank God they split up....My stepdad was HEAVEN SENT! He was a friend to my brother and I and always fair, he brought fun to our home, and
loved us and brought stability to our family ...that was way back in the 70s ...He is in heaven now, but gosh I miss him so much,
his kindness and patience made my childhood so HAPPY .......Stepfathers shouldn't try and take over as boss, but just love those kids, thats your job and everything will turn out GREAT!
It's just fucked up
Yeah... Leaving an abusive relationship is the most selfless thing you can do for yourself. You must really be ok with abuse in relationships. What if the person you married was an alcoholic or abused you? You would stay???! You only have one life. Live it happy with a spouse who loves you! I'm not saying give up easily and divorce, NO! But goodness if your not happy, leave. God forgives you and loves you. Nobody is perfect.