I'm not Vietnamese, I'm not German, and I'm not in a relationship but for whatever reason this is my favorite channel and love when you release long form content. ❤
As a German you're video inspired me to join the tandem club at my local meeting club for foreigners. They are in need for natural speakers to talk to them in. And may be I will finally come out of my shell and just do it.
Please do! I'm sure German learners would appreciate it. I have noticed over 40 years of travelling in Europe that it's so much harder now to practice any language. Everyone speaks better English than my level of European languages so that it feels silly if not churlish to not revert to English.
@@YO-wanna Hi! There are different organizations... In my area it is the AWO. Sonetimes the local VHS or the Familienbildunsstätte provide a Tandem Program. Depending on how big your town is, it can be that a University has a program.... Mine takes place in the local Begegnungsstätte which is a name for a place where all kind of people can meet, where courses take place or where you can just meet every now and than to play board games with locals and foreigners. Depending on your personal liking the churches might be the right place. In the Gemeindehäusern of the churches often meetings like this take place. So there can be many different possibilities. May be you just ask someone at your local Familienbildunsstätte. Even if they don't provide a course, usually they might know another organization who does. Hope that helps 🤗
Yes, Germans are quite direct compared to other cultures. Never tell a German that you would like to meet him or stay in contact with him if you don't mean it. He will be confused, very disappointed and take it personally. If a German tells you that he would like to meet you again, this is a big step for him because he is opening up to you and taking the risk of being rejected. So, if he does, then he really likes you 😊
Same with Ukranians and Russians. In America they are very casual about that and saying “I love you” to people that they barely know. To those of us from Europe and Eastern Europe, they’re dishonest, and it hurts. Americans don’t see anything wrong with their fake and misleading behavior.
yeah americans say a lot of stupid things thinking they are being 'nice' but it is not nice at all. I had a french friend living in the USA and he barely spoke english. He was a big mountain bike enthusiast and had brought his fancy bike from France. He met an american neighbor who also did mountain biking and the neighbor said "oh we should go biking together. I will show you the best places" This made my french friend so happy and he told the neighbor that he would put his bike together and then they could go. Well, he got his bike ready and let his neighbor know and the neighbor then avoided him from then on. My french friend was so hurt and disappointed. And it is stupid. Why set people up with invitations that you dont intend to follow through on ? The neighbor could just have said he likes biking and left it at that.
@@anastasia10017 I would be so annoyed if I were that French friend! I'm American but spent a lot of time in Europe / have European friends -- and my personality is much more European than it is American. I also HATE how Americans are super flakey and wishy-washy, often saying things they don't mean. I literally had someone from my apartment building (we met at an event) get sooo excited when she found out that I'm a writer, and I go to poetry events. I was also excited that I finally made a friend in my building! She asked to come with me next, and even texted me excitedly to ask me about the next upcoming event. I responded to her, and no reply. The day before I was going, I let her know, and no reply. She ghosted me lol! Even though we live in the same building. I have no idea what they get out of it... like why?? lol I feel like Americans just often aren't in touch with their emotions and say/do whatever they feel like in the moment, and then change their mind as soon as they don't feel up for it. It's such a disappointing lack of accountability. (Same in dating too but that's a different story hah)
I am German and have lived in the US for 40 years now and still feel this way! I've never gotten used to this fake "friendliness." I usually warn coworkers, etc, that I have a resting-bitch face and not take it too personally. 😂
It will get better! And what a great growing experience you will have, that will help you the rest of your life. My daughter went to a foreign country to work. It made a positive impact on her life. You got this! ❤
I just wanted to let you know, that I recently entered a relationship with someone who moved to Germany from a quite different culture. And while they didn't come from southeast asia nevertheless your videos helped a lot to navigate my blindspots for the struggles they face which I as a German wouldn't notice. And I noticed they faced in many ways similar struggles like you. So I just want so say thank you to you! (And this is my first time ever to comment on a UA-cam Video as far as I know, so you know it is very important to me ) 😅❤
@@JohnDoe-yq9rt No its not? A friend is a friend, a partner is a partner. Do you want me to say: May female friend visited ne today while my male partner went shopping? The gender doesn't change the kind of story told. You know what is weird? Asking about the gender of a persons partner you don't know and which isnt necessary at all to understand what they wanted to tell us
It’s not just western versus eastern. As an American, who came to Europe, I had the same culture shock. I’d go for a walk, and be thinking, everybody hates me!😂
Hate is not binary. You would be typically hated much more if you were nonwhite American. I know an Asian-American who worked (effectively for free) as a Professional English teacher in a business school. The German students were immediately underwhelmed and felt short changed when they found out that the teacher was not Anglo-Saxon. She claimed to be endlessly bullied by the students, something she had not experienced in her previous stints in France. But irrespective of race, they hate American go-getter attitude, and expect subservience as a foreigner.
Within Europe we are all very different, country to country. In Germany for example, although many people speak English, they refuse to use it so when I was there it was really uncomfortable because I’m used to ask for things in a polite manner (like ordering a coffee) and I got dirty looks instead of “Here you are, have a nice day” . I think they have the worst customer service skills and they look at you like you’re asking things for free not buying them…as soon as you open your mouth and they hear another language.
Why do you assume they cared if he/she was white or not? British and American already makes a difference. May I ask if this person had English as their first language? Because I am German and would not care at all which "color" the teacher was as long as they spoke proper English.
@@drefk1973 You Scandinavians are also distant (in general) but not in a rude way, it feels more like respect for personal space rather than rudeness. It might be just my personal experience but Finns (although not technically Scandinavian) are quite friendly people.
Personally I feel like our "coldness" is often more a very German feeling of "awkwardness" hiding behind that kind of facade. From personal experience I can attest that in circles that meet often, like coworkers, neighbours or sports club mates, closeness and openness usually happens VERY quickly and naturally - but at the same time we (I) don't want to bother others who may not want to be bothered and we don't want to intrude into other people's private lives, either. Like, I'd personally love to help out people moving here, being friends with them and showing them the ropes of living in Germany, but maybe they wouldn't want to be bothered? What if they find that weird? It's a silly thought process but what can we do. If you and your hubby want to make more connections though: Hit me up if you ever come to visit my hometown of Dresden and I'll be the perfect tour guide!
@WorldisArt. Me too! :D...cause many people don't know how precious that is...many women don't pay enough attention to how men can change around them when their heart is involved...but Uyen knows. :)
Uyen, du machst das super. Je mehr du Deutsch im Alltag benutzt, um so einfacher wird es mit der Zeit. Sei geduldig und zäh. Gut, dass du immerhin zum Deutschunterricht gegangen bist, auch wenn du am Ende feststellen musstest, dass es wieder nicht gut gelaufen ist. Du wirst das schon packen, wenn du nur ehrgeizig bleibst! Ich mag deine Videos sehr! Weiter so!
Und mit der "silly little goose" auf deutsch reden! Ich weiß, dass man schnell wieder in die einfachere Sprache verfällt, aber wie sagen wir hier so schön: "Übung macht den Meister!" Als ich in Kambodscha war und keine andre Wahl hatte als mit den Leuten englisch oder Khmer zu reden, hat sich mein englisch auch extrem verbessert. 👍
I love your sweaters, they‘re so cute and suit your personality! Regarding language levels, you express yourself so well in a second language, which is a brave feat by itself. Learning yet another language (that’s so different from your native language) is tough!! You should be proud that you can speak (at least) 3 languages!
Hey Uyen, I am from Hanoi and moved to Australia nearly 10 years ago for university. It is the same cultural shock here, where everything takes much much longer for the final results. I noticed two big reasons for that in Australia. Firstly, Australia has a much smaller population than Vietnam (26 million vs 98 million), so our workforce is also tiny. Secondly, most people prioritise their personal lives better than Vietnamese here. For example, I work with many mothers who work from 8.30am to 1pm because they need to pick up their children at 2.30/3pm from school. Australian culture does not have multigenerational households like Vietnamese, so couples have to raise their children themselves and struggle to manage work-life balance.
This wasn't a problem before Jews encouraged women to take up feminism and start earning their own incomes. It's done so much harm to families. In Australia it used to be the man was the sole provider and the woman was able to stay at home looking after the kids. Now thanks to the Jews who invented feminism, we have way less mothers and way more girl boss wine aunts who are miserable.
Coming from the us, i have to mentally prepare myself shopping with Germany and recite this mantra: “the cashier doesn’t hate you, she’s just german” . It’s the things you don’t realize you’re accustomed to that really catch you by surprise. I’m spoiled with cheery cashiers.
what you have to understand is: being cheery or overly friendly has another meaning in germany/europe. it does not mean "i do not hate you, everything is fine", it would actually mean "i am super excited to see you!" or "i am interested in being friends with you and i really like you!" and that is a bit much for a supermarket situation, don't you think? also: if someone hates you they would let you know. so if someone does nothing, everything is peaceful and fine. that actually makes me sad, that americans need constant reassurance that things are fine at any moment. must be so stressful! you should be happy to have to worry less now!
If the legends are to be believed, you probably won't have time to think about whether or not the cashier hates you because you'll need all your energy to frantically pack things as they are scanned.
Ha, yes! My boyfriend mentioned coming from Germany to the US that all the store employees here were so enthusiastic and friendly and they must LOVE their jobs. I had to explain to him that's just American customer service, whether they like their jobs or not!
actually being forced to constantly smile in your job can lead to mental problems and more emotional exhaustion, so maybe the experience for the customer is better when the cashier smiles, but the cashier has a heavier burden to bear in their job. As long as they are not actively saying anything bad to you you can count that as friendly
i'm in a similar situation to you... I've moved to the Netherlands and my partner is Dutch. What really helped me improving my language skills is telling him to stop using English with me. At the beginning of was difficult and I've cried a lot... But! In 3 months I improve so much in Dutch (more then in the 2.5 years I've spent in class trying to learn the language) At first we spoke one day a week Dutch and gradually we increased it. Now I'm proud to say, I'm a teacher in a Dutch primary school, teaching Dutch children in Dutch. I've been living here for 13 years, and I've only accomplished this, 2 years ago. But still, it's a dream come true. Good luck learning German! ❤
That is excellent advice. I hope Yuen reads it! *Speaking German once a week together would be an excellent way to start.* It sounds as if she may be somewhere between A1 and A2 level, and it's time to do something dramatic. I would also advise doing live classes with people who don't speak English. I moved to France with somewhere between A1 and A2 level, and what enabled me to eventually become fluent was taking a French class 90 minutes every day for nine months. And my classmates were from Chile, Japan, Poland... so when we chatted, we didn't have English to fall back on. In Germany it will be hard to find people who DON'T speak English, and that is an impediment to learning the native language for an anglophone.
Uyen, you are so lovely. Don’t forget that you already speak English very well so don’t be hard on yourself about the German language, although I suspect you are better than you think ❤
Agree about the German pens. German and Japanese have some similar traits and one of this is precision. Their pens and stationary are superb, just that the Japanese ones are cuter.😊
I'm so sorry you had the experience of being isolated and lonely. It can be really hard to make German friends if you don't know how to. I haven't watched enough of your videos to know when you started school and what year you were in but I believe especially in the beginning of a semester making friends as a student is very easy because of all the new people moving to a town, being away from friends and family and looking for new friends themselves. And there are usually so many first semester and newcomer activities. You do have to know about them though. Going to a sports club can be extremely helpful as well. There you can find locals that share an interest with you which is always a great topic to talk about.
I loved this video, but I'm actually loving these positive responses to the video from Germans and everyone else even more! Cannot wait for our family to visit Germany next year, from Australia. ❤
I'm German and lived here all my life. I visited many countries including Vietnam and the US and think every country and society has its pros and cons. German people are in many ways more relaxed than they used to be. For example making noise on Sundays or not separating your trash may annoy some people but there are very few who get angry. Most people just don't care. And there are more chatty people than you might think. They may be surprised at first, but my husband for instance can easily talk to almost everyone. I'm more reserved though and need more time but that's my personality and has nothing to do with my German origin 😊
The no reaction to noise on Sunday is probably a misconception on your part. It's not that people don't care, they just don't want to bother getting out of their house and having their time wasted telling someone else to keep it the fuck down. So they try to ignore it, but it's always done with a clenched fist.
I love your videos. It is a mammoth task to leave your country and take on normal life challenges like study and a new relationship. You have done well, and I admire your relationship. I love your videos. You have a great sense of humour, and you have great insight, and what you lack, your boyfriend seems to make up. Keep up the great work. I hope you both can come to visit Australia one day.
I went to Germany when I was 17…after I finished school…After 26 years I can say it was not easy but it was the best experience of my life 🥰🥰🇩🇪🇩🇪🥰🥰…just try to improve your German!😅
In my experience the biggest difference with Europe compared to other countries (including southern Europe actually) is that if for whatever reason you end up very poor there's a limit on the deprivations and misery you can end up in (which has a huge impact on crime, mental health, corruption, etc) but yeah it's definitely difficult to notice as a foreigner because generally foreigners do not have access to such basic income welfare
I gotta say out of all videos that I have watched about moving to Germany, yours are the one that I can relate the most. Thank you for sharing your story. Hopefully my time here in Germany will get better as the time passes by! I am taking my DSH exam soon and hopefully I will pass it and stay longer here in Germany. It is a beautiful country but it takes time to see its true beauty.
I'm a bit more outgoing and, for a German, quite talkative. I often talk to strangers, on the train, on the street, in a shop, whereever - and of course there a people who find that weird, I don't really care. More often people actually seem interested in a small talk. I suggest to start conversations with questions about things or procedures, most will be comfortable about that. And don't ask about how they are doing - if you don't want to get told in great length and detail! In contrast, if you ever have the chance to go northern Europe you will see how much more open Germans are. I was traveling in Denmark last month and always felt like I was too loud, too fast, too colourful and my gestures and facial expressions were also kinda too much for the Danes. It felt like no breathing room whatsoever...
In USA, North Georgia mountains. I have so enjoyed listening and watching your videos, the humor, hearing your difficulties, and your triumphs. It must have been very strange transitioning from Vietnam to a place like Germany! I am an immigrant (N. Ireland to USA) and while I did not experience having to learn another language, still, the cultural differences were epic! Our family was more formal and strict and American families the opposite - as a result, in school, the other children would call me and my siblings "stuck up" - our Irish schooling was far superior and at a young age, we were reading classical literature, while here, it was deplorable and American children were far behind us. My teachers in US would make me read to the class - which made the other children hate me! LOL Having said all that, there is definitely a cultural divide, differing ways of communicating and differing acceptable behaviors. So, long story short, I feel for you! You have done amazingly well. Good for you - sometimes being ignorant of the challenges ahead is all for the better! Thanks for your videos - I do enjoy them all!
Im German and I think we can be chatty if you talk to us in the right circumstances. We wont like being randomly stopped outside to be talked to, but if your joining some sort of hobby group or class people will be more open. Or if your a student there are usually a lot of events where you could go to chat to people
Yeah I think setting is everything.. don't expect to find friends in a grocery stores or during your daily commute, seek friends specifically at hobby groups, sports and other things, where people are going to seek company! Smalltalk and meeting people will be easy and fun there.
Coming from a small community, I would often visit on walks and in the grocery store because I don’t enjoy being inside amongst crowds and it became worse with COVID.
I agree! I always like to bring the example of dog owners. Even I, a very shy person and massive introvert, have no problem chatting with other dog owners that I meet on walks. The reasons seem obvious: we already have something in common and the focus is not on ourselves, but on the dogs. I think that definitely helps. :)
I am not German but I find it so normal that people make new connections only in the right circumstances. To my advantage though I come from Northern Europe myself. I know it’s partly luck but I had nearly only good experiences here in Germany. I must say, however, I think that speaking German well or at least a bit is a very important factor. Personally I find it normal. And most Germans react very sweet when they are impressed with your language skill 😊 und mein Deutsch ist überhaupt nicht das Gelbe vom Ei 😅
It was interesting to hear how you found "The West" as a Vietnamese. I had the opposit experience living in Vietnam as a Hungarian. It was so dishartening and frustrating that everyone always said yes or what they thought you wanted to hear and you never knew what they ment or what they will actually do. I never met as many pathological liars as I did in Hanoi😂 Also, bureaucracy is slow in Vietnam as well, except when you know the right people and have money, just like everywhere else BUT they do deliver whole ass fridges on the backs of the skinniest guys on a motorbike right away😂
I wouldn’t call them liars. It’s just culture. They are just very private with their thoughts and feelings and prefer to put the feelings and needs of the group above themselves. At least they are expected to. The US has an issue with directness, particularly if it’s from a person of color. And with everyone in competition with each other, being direct with your thoughts and feelings put you in a disadvantage. It’s a power thing too.
A lot people in Asia actually not gonna saying they hate you in your face. They gonna making bombastis side eyes, avoid you, making it clear that they never want to see you etc.
@@hermitwatcher8997 I didn't mean the patholigical liars as a joke, or a generalization. I ment 5 actual ppl, 1 I dated and me and all his friendgroups knew him as a different person, the other was the girl he ended up marrying because he got her pregnant and another was a fellow Hungarian. Never met such twisted ppl before BUT that is not the norm for Viet ppl. I met many really friendly and unbeleavably kind/generous individuals. However, overall I was tired and jaded from living in Vietnam as a student and also as a white woman open to dating. I respect their hustle, but I wasn't cut out for navigating their way of doing things.
There's a reason why the hashtag #hanoiing exists. They have a reputation for "chặt chém" overcharging and ripping off customers. While I've met many Hanoians who've been kind and friendly, I've never come across as many overtly mean and impolite people as I've met in Hanoi. It's bizarre because everywhere else in VN, people are generally warm and friendly and helpful. Also, no matter where I've been in VN, the Hanoians seem to have a reputation for being jerks, even amongst Hanoians themselves. When I try and figure out the root of some of the negative stereotypes I've come across (harsher northern environment, a longer history of deprivation cf. the south etc), my local friends and family will say, "No, it's just cause they're jerks."
"Pathological liars" - ditto for Bangladesh! People always say whatever sounds good to you without meaning it. Also extremely shady & passive-aggressive.
Love your honesty in this video Uyen! I watch a video just yesterday about a French girl who studied Norweigian and lived in Norway for only 3 years and she was fluent in Norwegian. She explained that she spent a lot of time listening to the language through podcasts and radio in every spare moment or when her hands were busy and her mind was free. She read books with audio and practiced repeating after them, she watched tv/movies with Norwegian subtitles, it sounded super intense, but it worked well for her. I'm sure you will do well too with German Boyfriend's help 😊
I enjoy German honesty, as an autistic person I can handle a direct way of speaking so much better and find it actually so helpful compared to the more superficial and polite communication styles.
I recently moved to a foreign country. Although my situation is not exactly like yours, I feel the same about many things you said...and it's reassuring to know that there are many people like us trying the best to learn, adjust, and make the most of it!
unrelated but i've been really enjoying your longer videos lately! especially the one where you talked abt cultural differences between between living in the 2 different countries + eating german bf's german food for a day! :D there's just a very comfy vibe
I don't know what it's like over there, but where I live there are groups for practicing English as well as language exchange groups for French, Spanish, Italian etc. It's a nice way to practice without feeling the pressure of a class and it's honestly the best way to improve listening which I'd consider to be the hardest language skill.
Oh - and here in Poland, I love your Germany colored pencils. Quality is great! Also markers. I'll have to check into those pens. A nice pen brightens any day!
It’s never easy to build a new home on the foreign ground. And I know what I’m talking about 😁 Just keep going, make new friends, learn the language, create your emotional maps of the cities, fill them with your memories and one day you’ll have YOUR Germany 😉
What I do not understand about all the complaining here: she really has it much easier than other foreigners, having a German boyfriend who can explain everything to her, who certainly has German friends who are willing to befriend her too, and she should definitely start practising her German with him then it would improve really fast. By the way I as a German know the feeling of living in a foreign country as I studies for half a year in France and I had nobody to explain the rules to me!
I'm an Australian who married a Finn and moved to Finland, and I was a little prepared for the culture shocks as I've visited here several times before actually moving, but a lot of the struggles seem quite familiar! It's hard to make friends with Finns as they tend to be fairly withdrawn, and I live in a small town so there aren't as many organised social things I could attend, and not everyone is confident in English. I do speak some Finnish but Finnish is even harder to learn than German so I'm pretty ropey at it (I'm a German citizen and learned German for 3 and a half years in school, although you couldn't exactly say I was fluent - it's just an easier language to learn as a native English speaker). And the darkness really messes with your circadian rhythm. Probably the warnings I'd give people moving to Finland are a) Finnish bureaucracy can be really stupid and very difficult to navigate if you don't have a native Finnish or Swedish speaker to help you as quite a lot of services aren't available in English. I'm lucky enough to have my wife to help me. b) It can be quite difficult to find work here if you aren't a fluent Finnish speaker. So far I haven't found any, although in my case it's because I live in a small town. I'm sure it's nice to come and study here as a lot of the universities are English language, and cost of living and rent are lower than they would be in Australia, the immigration policy is considerably kinder than it is in Aus and you get a better standard of housing than you would in Australia. So I still feel very lucky and happy to be here, but it's not the easiest country to move to.
First, in Finland and the rest of the nordic countries it is expensive for the governement to reach out in a language that is not a legal obligation. Translation of all the different papers and such is expensive. Sweden has five minority languages and English is none of them. It can be very risky if anyone guides you in a language that might set you up in a legal conundrum. Why should countries that doesn't speak English serve you in your native language? Should we also translate our laws to French, German, Spanish and Mandarin? Second, do your best to learn Finnish, both writing and speaking. So you can manage on your own instead of relying on your partner for everything. And go on a roadtrip alone in the summer, visit the museums, learn about the history and the people.
@@Mjao519 I think western countries should be obliged to have everything also in English. We live in a very globalized world, and English has become, at least in this part of the world, the true lingua franca. And as such, we need to use it. I am from the Czech Republic, and I used to teach the Czech language to foreigners coming to our country because I think it is great to be able to communicate, read the news and literature, enjoy chats with locals, etc., in the language of the country you are visiting. And, let's be honest, parts of the Czech (or any other native) culture cannot be passed to other people without the language in which it originated. I have also translated books from English to Czech, and I am busy communicating science to our general public, mostly in Czech, because I know that not everyone here is able to enjoy these things in English. However, I also believe that my country should be able to communicate in English in every vital area of their citizen's and visitors' lives and that all of our children should be taught English in schools. And we should be encouraged and have more possibilities to learn the English language well. Having one language brings us closer together, and it is criminal to ignore it. I have nothing against learning other languages (I am a native Czech speaker, I mostly communicate in English on the internet and partly at work, but I also studied French, and I am now taking Duolingo classes in Polish (for work reasons), German and Spanish (I find it useful) and Korean (just for fun)), and especially the language of the country you are coming to (I might be living in Poland for a few years, if everything goes according to plans, hence the Polish - although I can speak solely in English with my colleagues), but still, it should be a "nice to have", not "absolutely have to have". English is the latter.
@@JelenaBraum Thank you for your opinion. I disagree. Nordic countries have passed through hundreds of years, never forgetting their own language. But the lingua franca has changed. Medieval? Latin. Hanseatic? German. Romantic? French. Why English? Why should our adminstrators, judges, politicans, be chosen on bases of how well they can translate our daily administration and lawpractice, to English? We do not speak English in our offices, on our lunchbreaks or in the printer room on our workplaces. Just notice how bad I can present myself, just here and now! Not dignified.
I applaud you for having the diligence to learn other languages. I’m from the Detroit, Michigan in the United States. Friends in my circle have attended universities and have traveled but most visit English speaking countries despite having studied a foreign language in high school or in college. I have observed that Americans are very resentful of people who have pronounced foreign accents when speaking English. It is because in our vast country one can travel from one coast to another and only speak English. A great many people have not travelled outside if the US. Many years ago when I visited German many signs at bus/train station were in multiple languages. Even in New York, our most cosmopolitan city, it is rare to find signage in multiple languages.
@@Squidwardsangryface Just because someone is not smiling and not open to talking to people, it doesn't mean they are unfriendly, it's neutral. There is friendly, neutral, and unfriendly. In order to become friendly or unfriendly, something has to shift the mood to those things. If nothing shifts the mood, then neutral is the default state. This is how I often try to explain things as a Romanian person living in the US - I'm not mad, but nothing major has happened to shift my mood to overtly friendly. Something about the neutrality seems to bother people here and I am not sure what it is?
Americans can be very friendly. Not all Amercians are friendly or extroverted. Canadians are very friendly. English are friendly with their mates(friends), but they won't approach strangers for a chat like Americans and possibly Canadians. Really Amercians are the only ones I know that will approach strangers and chat for the sake of chatting.
@@ivylovesrunning we are friendly and Just chat and hug people and welcome everybody...when I went to Vienna recently I wanted to cry people where so coollld🥲
If you want really friendly(sometimes to the point of being kind of uncomfortable) Canadians, then you're looking at Newfoundlanders. Those people will invite a stranger in to have dinner and stay the night, chat with anyone they meet, and are responsible for everyone thinking we say "Eh!" all the time.
Funnily enough, you only have to go hiking on a mountain in Bavaria and you are in a completely different German society. Every person you meet on the way greets you and you talk about how far you still have to go. When you get to the top, you share the same table at the mountain hut and get into conversation. I love the feeling of experiencing so much warmth every time. It's so strange that when you get to the valley, hardly anyone is like that. Especially not in cities.
My Italian husband and I (British) immediately noticed how much more Bavarians smile, even in towns, compared other Germans. He always insists it's because they're catholic!
Hello Uyen, thanks for this honest video ❤my heart is with you, i can understand your feelings about the germans. But i must say, the most important thing to make friends here is to speak our language. I tell you this because i made the same experience in Spain. I love Spain, but to connect to the people, speaking their language is the most important thing. So much people think that speaking english is the best solution, because we learn this in school, but that’s not true. maybe i think this way, because learning spain since a few years opened up my eyes, how difficult it is to learn a different language as an adult. Te best greetings from a German woman, it would be an honor for me to know such a strong woman as you❤Take care of yourself
I've heard people say "It's hard to make friends with a German, but if you do, you have a friend for life". Overall I think it's just a different communication style and Germans mostly do tend to want to form deeper, long lasting relationships.
Just leaving a comment to say I love your videos and you can be really proud of yourself! I’m from the German speaking part of Europe and spent some time in China and another East Asian country. During my first trip in China I felt like for the first time in my life I understood what it must mean to be a foreigner in Europe and how hard it is. So many unwritten rules, different habits and customs one is not yet familiar with, and so many traps one can walk into!
I don't think Germans are cold, I'm Asian in Germany too, if you know how to use your sense of humour or be friendly I think they can be very funny & nice. I made so many German friends here. Plus those Asian fakeness of always smiling made me tired. I appreciate strangers in public say hello or giving a smile to me here
It's interesting hearing your struggles with learning German! I have a very hard time learning new languages, and German made the most sense to me- but I think it's because my native langauge is English, which borrows heavily from German. I took it for 4 years back in college. It's been a long time, but I still remember a good bit of it! Keep it up, you’ll get there 💪
I think nobody should feel bad for having a wrong image of any place from the media you consume. It's hard to accurately portray a place diversely in the first place, and of course you have a hard time to understand it within the parameters you know. Thats how it works for all of us, and it's not just "east" and "west", it is a phenomenon that happens between lots of parts in the world and even countries that aren't even far apart like Germany and Italy. We're all different, things are diverse and we shouldn't feel bad about needing time to understand and adjust.
This is so relatable to all of us who moved halways across the world as a student and build a life from scratch away from all of our loved ones. You're lucky you had your boyfriend there already and that was supportive in a time of huge change in your life
Thank you so much for all of your videos! My gf wants to move to Germany where I live and she's from the US - this is gonna be quite the wild ride I suppose. She's very good with picking up on learning German though! Your videos really help us get a better idea of how it might be like, it's very helpful!
I'm from the UK where the need for niceties and politeness can make it hard to read people's genuine feelings. I love germans for their directness, it's much easier to navigate relationships when people are honest and upfront!
My sister lived in Germany for 20 years and somehow adopted their directness, not a great thing when she joined me to live in Canada 😂 people here are very very polite and kinda reserved when it comes to express their feelings and most of the times my sister is misunderstood. Does it affect her daily socializing? Not at all, people who get to know her love her, she has more Canadian friends than I do..(I have been in Canada since 2000) What I’m trying to say is just be yourself and people will like you for your genuineness..
Of course it would be good to be fluent in German, but your English is great, and you are using that to earn a living, so don't be hard on yourself because you only have basic words in German, Well done for learning ANOTHER language at all!
Think about how much or rather how little Vietnamese foreigners who live in Vietnam speak. I think you're doing great with your German! And yes I agree, there's so many things one wishes one knew before moving to a country with a different culture. You live, you learn!
Also, 4 years isn't that long as far as learning languages go. If I try to think about what I was able to say and understand in English after 4 years of class, it really wasn't a lot. Of course, I didn't live there, but still, the beginnings are always kind of slow, and we tend to forget them when we are fluent after 10, 15 or 20 years. Once you reach the point where you can confidently have conversations in German and watch TV, it becomes easier to practice without noticing it, but getting to that point is hard and takes a lot of time and effort for most people (I met two persons in my life who were able to reach a super impressive level in less than a year, but, well, us mere mortals don't seem to be able to do that, and that's OK).
“It’s never too late to start something.” Thanks Uyen, that means a lot for me. I finished my Master degree in 2022 then I took a “break” because of the stress of the pandemic and my father died during that time while I couldn’t even visit him because of the hard choices: visit him, or not getting any degree at all (my masters got from aboard also). I was so burnt out such that I don’t even know what to do. Yet still managed to work as freelance for my own bill. Now, it almost 2 years prior. I already set my mental readiness to continue pursuing my doctorate degree in Germany. I hope I can be there during spring 2024 at Stuttgart (Max Planck Institute). Salam, _Moch From Indonesia 🇮🇩
As a westerner who wants to move to Vietnam this is really useful actually! Realizing that there are other people taking the leap to live abroad and that it’s not easy for anyone makes me feel better about my own worries.
It has been so great to watch how much your content has matured. It was fun in your earlier work, but now I am more interested in your insight. Best to you and your sweetheart.
Uyen, I totally understand the thing about German classes and trying desperately not to cry in class. I can't count the amount of times I signed off, or went home, and went immediately to wherever my husband was and just sobbed. "I can't do this! I'll never be able to speak this language! I'll never understand anything!" I can promise you that, although it doesn't really get any easier, it's totally possible. I just got my C2 earlier this year, so I'm living proof. It's a lot of work, sweat, and tears, but I believe in you. You can do this!
I really love your videos. You are so down to earth and funny and you seem to have such optimism about everything even when it seems hard or disappointing. It just makes me feel good to see a couple that are clearly in love and so supportive of each other. Thank you for bringing a bright spot and optimism to my days.
I love your channel because you are honest about how things are the good the bad and the ugly side of things and that is why i think your content is so interesting and YES you are funny on top of it. For me I see you as brave for leaving your country and starting a new life, keep going you are on the right path.♥
I am sure you will learn German. One day you will suddenly have a full conversation without feeling stressed. 😊 Du schaffst das! Also when it comes to things happening fast: That changed in the past couple of years. I am German, but moved abroad about 9 years ago and appointments taking ages is one of the things I noticed had changed. It used to be much shorter waiting times to see a specialist. Your videos are always so funny 😅
You’re amazing, you’ve achieved so much!! I think this video is good for westerners going to Vietnam too! Or, in my experience, going to many Asian cultures- especially about being indirect, in Australia we’re not as direct as Germans but also I’ve found that Asian people can be difficult to read their true feelings sometimes. ❤
I love your dinosaur jumper. So cute. And I agree - good on you for showing up consistently to your German classes and not crying, even though it is so difficult.
The best thing about your videos is that I can understand every word! this is how I improve my English! And of course I like your topics too. You're adopted...uh, no, what was that called? oh yes, subscribed.lg
You are spot on with your observations. I just returned to Germany after two decades in the US and experienced all this in reverse culture shock. The bureaucracy has no rival in the western world. I do feel at Home here, though, and will have to learn again to cope.
Be proud. You deserve it. You’re the one that’s adorable. Your ability to share quips off the cuff show a wonderful gift of gab. As a wife if a Dutchman, I understand the directness you describe. Also, I’m a smiler to strangers so what you mentioned in just walking around would be depressing. I also cycle and say hello to pretty much everyone I pass by on the trails. Keep up the honest content. All the best!
I give you a lot of credit! Moving to such a different place than your used to has to be difficult in so many ways. Good luck with your German classes! Your videos are great. I've learned a lot about both Vietnam and Germany from you. The kitchen thing blows my mind😂
Love your videos and your insights into both German and Vietnamese culture, and your relationship with German boyfriend. Id love to hear more about your progress in learning German. Especially if you considered making shorts or something in German for those of who are also learning. I find a lot of stuff designed for language learners a bit disheartening bc the people who are in them are so good, so I think it would be cool to listen to someone who is also learning, and maybe it would be good practice /confidence boosting for you too 😊😊 Thanks for all the great stuff you make, look forward to watching more regardless of where you take the channel ❤
German classes only bring you so far, I recommend to joins activities or classes on things you like (maybe arts, or sports) where you are forced to speak and only listen to German. That will give you the feeling of the language. When I lived in Paris for a year I did not improve my skill much until I joined the university and I was sitting in lectures, it was so hard the first 6 months but in the end you make immense progress
From my perspective as a German one negative consequence of indirect communication is that it makes me sort of think that it can turn people hypervigilant, so not smiling means a lot more in other cultures than here. I personallywould feel uncomfortable knowing someone is just smiling at me because they think I am expecting them to smile or be friendly. Especially when I don’t know them, they don’t owe anything to me. But I do see conversations going smoother and sometimes situations being handled quicker when everyone is just a little more polite to each other.
Great video! I have been following along silently for several months from Oklahoma USA. I love your videos. It gives me something to laugh and smile over!
I came to Germany with my family at age 5. I went to Kindergarten and School here and German is in fact my second language but in reality my first. I think, I am fully integrated but in spite of everybody saying that I am practically German, I assure you, I am not. My parents come from Southamerica and we came here as refugees. I learned German culture in school which is different than having German family history and roots. I am influenced by the German way of thinking and I am not good at the indirect way of communicating. My mom still communicates that way and it either goes over my head or it makes me grumpy and impatient because I don't understand why she cannot just say what she wants and expects me to read her mind or guess what she means. Over the years I have met many Southamericans who came to Germany to study or find a new life with their German partners and my observation has always been that not learning German from the beginning makes it so much more difficult to adapt to the different culture. Of course, it is a shock and the "coldness" gets to you. Also, families are much closer in my country than in Germany and friends are often like family members. Everybody just comes by whenever they want or need to, nobody calls first. If you are eating and get unexpected visitors you just invite them without hesitation or feeling disturbed. This sounds warm and cozy, friendly and peaceful BUT when you are used to Germany you can also see the negative side of it: everybody is in everybodies business, you are never alone and surrounded by different people all the time and it is difficult to plan anything. For me that is quite stressful. I need my alone time and I want to be able to plan my time and I don't want everybodies opinion on my life choices 🙂. This is just one aspect of it. There is also a different emotional world behind German and Spanish and I need to be flexible. So, as much as I understand the difficulties of people from other countries having to adapt to a perceived harsher environment, "colder" temperaments and feeling lonely when no longer surrounded by family and friends, I would love to tell everybody in that situation: The sooner you learn German (and you don't need to be perfect, just fluent enough to express yourself and understand other people) the sooner you will start to feel more at home. You will find friends, even if it takes some time, and you do not need to let go of your individuality as a person from another country. Most Germans I have met really appreciate to learn about other countries, try different food and they will embrace you being different and let me tell you: Germans are very lovely, considerate and loyal friends!
As a German that lived abroad in Latin America for a while, I totally understand what you mean. After coming back to Germany I had quite a hard time communicating directly again.
I definitely relate to the visa issues, medical waits, and the improved relationship with parents moving abroad.. love your videos, theyre my comfort vids ❤
You should have come to Ireland. We have our own problems but only one of those you mentioned - you will wait forever for furniture/appointments with specialists etc. But almost everybody smiles and it's natural to us, most people are eager to talk to strangers, few of us are confrontational and, of course, we speak English.
Agree. I'm a huge Ireland fan and have visited your beautiful island at least 15 times. Was just there in October and chatted with so many people. At the local market, pub, grocery store, lol. Irish people are really friendly and love to chat, but at the same time, have a polite manner to them. 💚🤍🧡
I have to say I really love your long form videos. It’s so great that you can ger much more in depth with the topics of the videos. Thanks a lot Uyen :)
im from the US and moved to the German part of Switzerland 12 years ago. I can relate to a lot from this video. the only way I found to really improve German was to avoid English speaking people and force myself on the Swiss haha. was not easy, figuratively or emotionally, but it worked out well!
Another FUN and WONDERFUL and INFORMATIVE video from Uyen. I think that this type of video would be sooop helpful for anyone thinking of moving to Germany.
I didn't intend it. Growing up I liked ping-pong. I went to college 10 hours from my house, didn't know anyone and so went to game rooms to play table tennis. Instantly all my friends were from very different cultures. Normal American high school and I had zero knowledge to tell apart someone from Laos, Malaysia, Mymar, Thialand...so now if you are looking for others in different cultures, perhaps look to what hobby would put you with a more diverse selection of people.
do you live in a bigger city in a non-english speaking country? then you can try to find classes that teach a skill that interests you in english. that usually means that people from different countries will join. i did a coding course in english here in berlin and since then i have so many international friends from all over the world, it's really cool!
I feel so at home with you! I think you are actually a Californian! I feel for you and am so happy you have a loving boyfriend to help you have warmth and closeness and laughter! You remind me of what it was like growing up with my German grandparents in the US. So scary! Mean faces. Harsh voices. Scolding all the time. Spanking. Obsessed with bowel movements! So many rules to remember. Always afraid I was breaking one I didn't know about. Good at criticism and expecting perfection. Great at expressing disapproval but not good at expressing vulnerable emotions. Sentimental was as close as they got. Real gratitude and forgiveness were not in their toolbox. Compassion is not a thing. Empathy is weakness. Etc. Now after much therapy, I have l learned to see that is how I was treating myself and to find the opposite qualities that I needed within my self. I now have so much compassion for those poor emotionally armored people. They too learned to protect themselves from coldness by becoming even more impenetrable. I also learned to hide my real feelings and thoughts in a SE Asian way, being indirect, non-confrontational and accommodating.(One friend describes it as "never ripple the pond") These are all survival strategies that have been perfected over 100's of years. As you so adorably and wisely and humorously illustrate, we are here to let these strategies go at last. Time to be our true loving tender and caring selves. And help others to break free!!! Imagine, you are melting German resistance to the very thing they long for and are terrified of. Warmth!❤
I think learning the language will help a ton with making friends and talking more to strangers. I moved to the Netherlands to study and when I only spoke english I hardly had any dutch friends. Once I really, really put in an effort to learn the language I made many friends here. People want to speak their native language, especially when hanging out in a group. If one person only speaks english, the whole group has to accommodate them. Many germans also do not actually speak english that well or are self conscious about it. Try to get your boyfriend to only speak german to you, read german (childrens) books or comics, take some more classes. There is always the awkward stage of not being able to express yourself well when learning a new language. But to get better you have to power through and it WILL get better. Best of luck to you with everything!!!
And that is exactly why we need people like you to come here. To tell us what is not as good as we might think and, maybe, to help us make it better. Thank you for being with us. But the story of German efficiency is a tale of yore... it has been devoured by bureaucracy.
Yes. Since both can be accessed via internet, not owning the device does not mean that you don't have to pay the tax. So you all pay it. It's cheaper, however, if you live in a WG - a shared apartment. Basically- there are different tax categories even for our radio tax@@morgianasartre6709
@@morgianasartre6709 , it is true. Sometimes I think Germans are like soldats. They don't claim in demos that don't agree with such payments or do anything against it. There should be many that can afford it. I personally find it bad.
@@julsmatka4313 Yeah it's still a weird and rather expensive fee for something that many people might not utilise at all. And I don't really see how it can guarantee unbiased media, as long as it is run by people there will always be a level of bias.
Uyen, I am very proud of you as that is a huge culture shock coming from Vietnam to Germany, but in my opinion you are doing incredible and it's a joy watching you grow and blossom to who you are today vs four years ago. I can relate to you when it comes to leaving family and friends and hoping to maintain good contact thanks to technology but as for you it did not work out for me either - so you are not alone. German is a hard language to learn but remember it's the fact that you haven't given up is what makes you a winner, I do recommend Duolingo which will help in between your German class! Keep on smiling and with time everything will fall into place :)
I'm not Vietnamese, I'm not German, and I'm not in a relationship but for whatever reason this is my favorite channel and love when you release long form content. ❤
We are the same
me too
She is so likable. Love her authenticity. 🌸
It's very educational 😊.
Me to
As a German you're video inspired me to join the tandem club at my local meeting club for foreigners. They are in need for natural speakers to talk to them in. And may be I will finally come out of my shell and just do it.
That's wonderful! Good for you! 🙂
I have tandem partners who are helping me to learn German. You will be greatly appreciated!
Please do! I'm sure German learners would appreciate it.
I have noticed over 40 years of travelling in Europe that it's so much harder now to practice any language. Everyone speaks better English than my level of European languages so that it feels silly if not churlish to not revert to English.
That's really kind We immigrants really appreciate being seen
@@YO-wanna Hi! There are different organizations... In my area it is the AWO. Sonetimes the local VHS or the Familienbildunsstätte provide a Tandem Program. Depending on how big your town is, it can be that a University has a program.... Mine takes place in the local Begegnungsstätte which is a name for a place where all kind of people can meet, where courses take place or where you can just meet every now and than to play board games with locals and foreigners. Depending on your personal liking the churches might be the right place. In the Gemeindehäusern of the churches often meetings like this take place. So there can be many different possibilities. May be you just ask someone at your local Familienbildunsstätte. Even if they don't provide a course, usually they might know another organization who does. Hope that helps 🤗
My life motto is, "Be the person you needed when you were younger." This is such a great display and that!!
Great motto! I am trying to be that to my nieces and nephews.
Thats what i do, beeing a good mam, but tying also to be that person for my girl
I love that motto!
Yes, Germans are quite direct compared to other cultures. Never tell a German that you would like to meet him or stay in contact with him if you don't mean it. He will be confused, very disappointed and take it personally. If a German tells you that he would like to meet you again, this is a big step for him because he is opening up to you and taking the risk of being rejected. So, if he does, then he really likes you 😊
Same with Ukranians and Russians. In America they are very casual about that and saying “I love you” to people that they barely know. To those of us from Europe and Eastern Europe, they’re dishonest, and it hurts. Americans don’t see anything wrong with their fake and misleading behavior.
yeah americans say a lot of stupid things thinking they are being 'nice' but it is not nice at all. I had a french friend living in the USA and he barely spoke english. He was a big mountain bike enthusiast and had brought his fancy bike from France. He met an american neighbor who also did mountain biking and the neighbor said "oh we should go biking together. I will show you the best places" This made my french friend so happy and he told the neighbor that he would put his bike together and then they could go. Well, he got his bike ready and let his neighbor know and the neighbor then avoided him from then on. My french friend was so hurt and disappointed. And it is stupid. Why set people up with invitations that you dont intend to follow through on ? The neighbor could just have said he likes biking and left it at that.
Exactly they mean what they say unlike Asians and Americans and British!!
@@anastasia10017 I would be so annoyed if I were that French friend! I'm American but spent a lot of time in Europe / have European friends -- and my personality is much more European than it is American. I also HATE how Americans are super flakey and wishy-washy, often saying things they don't mean.
I literally had someone from my apartment building (we met at an event) get sooo excited when she found out that I'm a writer, and I go to poetry events. I was also excited that I finally made a friend in my building! She asked to come with me next, and even texted me excitedly to ask me about the next upcoming event.
I responded to her, and no reply. The day before I was going, I let her know, and no reply. She ghosted me lol! Even though we live in the same building. I have no idea what they get out of it... like why?? lol
I feel like Americans just often aren't in touch with their emotions and say/do whatever they feel like in the moment, and then change their mind as soon as they don't feel up for it. It's such a disappointing lack of accountability. (Same in dating too but that's a different story hah)
I am German and have lived in the US for 40 years now and still feel this way! I've never gotten used to this fake "friendliness."
I usually warn coworkers, etc, that I have a resting-bitch face and not take it too personally. 😂
hello Uyen, just wanted to say that your videos make me less lonely in my student year in France as an Algerian. i love your videos !!. peace :) .
It will get better! And what a great growing experience you will have, that will help you the rest of your life. My daughter went to a foreign country to work. It made a positive impact on her life. You got this! ❤
@@traczebabe your comment makes me feel warm🥹✨
Studying abroad is an amazing choice and you shd be proud of yourself for doing this. Keep up
@@traczebabe thanks, i am learning alot everyday, there is alot of hard times here tho. Especially the papers !!!.
@@resta-kain thanks :)
I just wanted to let you know, that I recently entered a relationship with someone who moved to Germany from a quite different culture. And while they didn't come from southeast asia nevertheless your videos helped a lot to navigate my blindspots for the struggles they face which I as a German wouldn't notice. And I noticed they faced in many ways similar struggles like you. So I just want so say thank you to you! (And this is my first time ever to comment on a UA-cam Video as far as I know, so you know it is very important to me ) 😅❤
why don't you say the gender
@@JohnDoe-yq9rt why would anyone need to share details about them and their partners with complete strangers?
@@JohnDoe-yq9rtwhy would that be of interest to you?
@@heikesiegl2640 because it’s weird not to say the gender
@@JohnDoe-yq9rt No its not? A friend is a friend, a partner is a partner.
Do you want me to say: May female friend visited ne today while my male partner went shopping? The gender doesn't change the kind of story told.
You know what is weird?
Asking about the gender of a persons partner you don't know and which isnt necessary at all to understand what they wanted to tell us
We should change "German Boyfriend" to "Silly Little Goose".
😂😂😂
@@curatorconservator5170 gosling
@@curatorconservator5170A gander is still a goose, it's just a male one. But the species as a whole is a goose.
Technically... Isn't he "german fiancee"? 😅
this was the cutest little compliment. “we are in love so around me, he’s a silly little goose”
It’s not just western versus eastern. As an American, who came to Europe, I had the same culture shock. I’d go for a walk, and be thinking, everybody hates me!😂
Hate is not binary. You would be typically hated much more if you were nonwhite American.
I know an Asian-American who worked (effectively for free) as a Professional English teacher in a business school. The German students were immediately underwhelmed and felt short changed when they found out that the teacher was not Anglo-Saxon. She claimed to be endlessly bullied by the students, something she had not experienced in her previous stints in France.
But irrespective of race, they hate American go-getter attitude, and expect subservience as a foreigner.
As a Swede, I think the Germans are WAY too up close and personal. Just leave me alone
Within Europe we are all very different, country to country. In Germany for example, although many people speak English, they refuse to use it so when I was there it was really uncomfortable because I’m used to ask for things in a polite manner (like ordering a coffee) and I got dirty looks instead of “Here you are, have a nice day” . I think they have the worst customer service skills and they look at you like you’re asking things for free not buying them…as soon as you open your mouth and they hear another language.
Why do you assume they cared if he/she was white or not? British and American already makes a difference. May I ask if this person had English as their first language? Because I am German and would not care at all which "color" the teacher was as long as they spoke proper English.
@@drefk1973 You Scandinavians are also distant (in general) but not in a rude way, it feels more like respect for personal space rather than rudeness.
It might be just my personal experience but Finns (although not technically Scandinavian) are quite friendly people.
Personally I feel like our "coldness" is often more a very German feeling of "awkwardness" hiding behind that kind of facade. From personal experience I can attest that in circles that meet often, like coworkers, neighbours or sports club mates, closeness and openness usually happens VERY quickly and naturally - but at the same time we (I) don't want to bother others who may not want to be bothered and we don't want to intrude into other people's private lives, either.
Like, I'd personally love to help out people moving here, being friends with them and showing them the ropes of living in Germany, but maybe they wouldn't want to be bothered? What if they find that weird? It's a silly thought process but what can we do.
If you and your hubby want to make more connections though: Hit me up if you ever come to visit my hometown of Dresden and I'll be the perfect tour guide!
You sound like my husband explaining about the Swiss to me 😆I asked him "Why do you guys overthink so much!?"
Dresden is mine and my husband's very favorite city!
@@dawnforlife , I agree with you 100%
@@dawnforlifeit's not overthinking, it's cultural nuance that is hard to grasp for foreigners (which is completely understandable).
Rubbish. German coldness is xenophobia.
And I am not sorry for my directness. Germans claim to love it.
Vietnamese, English and German sort of, plus Masters Degree and UA-cam....woweee! I love your jumper!!
"... around me, he's a silly lil Goose!" made me put my hands on my chest out of how heartwarming that was ❤
@WorldisArt. Me too! :D...cause many people don't know how precious that is...many women don't pay enough attention to how men can change around them when their heart is involved...but Uyen knows. :)
Uyen, du machst das super. Je mehr du Deutsch im Alltag benutzt, um so einfacher wird es mit der Zeit. Sei geduldig und zäh. Gut, dass du immerhin zum Deutschunterricht gegangen bist, auch wenn du am Ende feststellen musstest, dass es wieder nicht gut gelaufen ist. Du wirst das schon packen, wenn du nur ehrgeizig bleibst! Ich mag deine Videos sehr! Weiter so!
Und mit der "silly little goose" auf deutsch reden! Ich weiß, dass man schnell wieder in die einfachere Sprache verfällt, aber wie sagen wir hier so schön: "Übung macht den Meister!"
Als ich in Kambodscha war und keine andre Wahl hatte als mit den Leuten englisch oder Khmer zu reden, hat sich mein englisch auch extrem verbessert. 👍
I love your sweaters, they‘re so cute and suit your personality! Regarding language levels, you express yourself so well in a second language, which is a brave feat by itself. Learning yet another language (that’s so different from your native language) is tough!! You should be proud that you can speak (at least) 3 languages!
I wish I could find sweater cardigans like hers.
Hey Uyen, I am from Hanoi and moved to Australia nearly 10 years ago for university. It is the same cultural shock here, where everything takes much much longer for the final results. I noticed two big reasons for that in Australia. Firstly, Australia has a much smaller population than Vietnam (26 million vs 98 million), so our workforce is also tiny. Secondly, most people prioritise their personal lives better than Vietnamese here. For example, I work with many mothers who work from 8.30am to 1pm because they need to pick up their children at 2.30/3pm from school. Australian culture does not have multigenerational households like Vietnamese, so couples have to raise their children themselves and struggle to manage work-life balance.
This wasn't a problem before Jews encouraged women to take up feminism and start earning their own incomes. It's done so much harm to families. In Australia it used to be the man was the sole provider and the woman was able to stay at home looking after the kids. Now thanks to the Jews who invented feminism, we have way less mothers and way more girl boss wine aunts who are miserable.
@@JohnDoe-yq9rt I wasn't aware that Jew is a synonym for French.
@@JohnDoe-yq9rtCongrats, that's the dumbest thing I've read this week. Poor little antisemite incel
@@JohnDoe-yq9rt is this satire highlighting antisemitism? Well played, I can barely tell the difference.
They always call you an anti-semite, but they never say you're wrong.@@wretchedrichard2955
Coming from the us, i have to mentally prepare myself shopping with Germany and recite this mantra: “the cashier doesn’t hate you, she’s just german” .
It’s the things you don’t realize you’re accustomed to that really catch you by surprise. I’m spoiled with cheery cashiers.
what you have to understand is: being cheery or overly friendly has another meaning in germany/europe. it does not mean "i do not hate you, everything is fine", it would actually mean "i am super excited to see you!" or "i am interested in being friends with you and i really like you!" and that is a bit much for a supermarket situation, don't you think?
also: if someone hates you they would let you know. so if someone does nothing, everything is peaceful and fine.
that actually makes me sad, that americans need constant reassurance that things are fine at any moment. must be so stressful! you should be happy to have to worry less now!
@@robopechathey just love happy chat ,they dont expect anyone to truly care ,sometimes just a smile and couple of warm words help 😊
If the legends are to be believed, you probably won't have time to think about whether or not the cashier hates you because you'll need all your energy to frantically pack things as they are scanned.
Ha, yes! My boyfriend mentioned coming from Germany to the US that all the store employees here were so enthusiastic and friendly and they must LOVE their jobs. I had to explain to him that's just American customer service, whether they like their jobs or not!
actually being forced to constantly smile in your job can lead to mental problems and more emotional exhaustion, so maybe the experience for the customer is better when the cashier smiles, but the cashier has a heavier burden to bear in their job. As long as they are not actively saying anything bad to you you can count that as friendly
i'm in a similar situation to you... I've moved to the Netherlands and my partner is Dutch. What really helped me improving my language skills is telling him to stop using English with me. At the beginning of was difficult and I've cried a lot... But! In 3 months I improve so much in Dutch (more then in the 2.5 years I've spent in class trying to learn the language) At first we spoke one day a week Dutch and gradually we increased it. Now I'm proud to say, I'm a teacher in a Dutch primary school, teaching Dutch children in Dutch. I've been living here for 13 years, and I've only accomplished this, 2 years ago. But still, it's a dream come true. Good luck learning German! ❤
Oh wow dat is echt geweldig hoor! ❤ Nederlands spreken is niet bepaald makkelijk. Dus petje af daarvoor.
@@mareldaal1455 Dankjewel! 💜
That is excellent advice. I hope Yuen reads it! *Speaking German once a week together would be an excellent way to start.* It sounds as if she may be somewhere between A1 and A2 level, and it's time to do something dramatic. I would also advise doing live classes with people who don't speak English.
I moved to France with somewhere between A1 and A2 level, and what enabled me to eventually become fluent was taking a French class 90 minutes every day for nine months. And my classmates were from Chile, Japan, Poland... so when we chatted, we didn't have English to fall back on.
In Germany it will be hard to find people who DON'T speak English, and that is an impediment to learning the native language for an anglophone.
Uyen, you are so lovely. Don’t forget that you already speak English very well so don’t be hard on yourself about the German language, although I suspect you are better than you think ❤
Agree about the German pens. German and Japanese have some similar traits and one of this is precision. Their pens and stationary are superb, just that the Japanese ones are cuter.😊
Not only do they similar traits in precision, bur also were on the same side in a war back in the 40's...💀
I'm so sorry you had the experience of being isolated and lonely. It can be really hard to make German friends if you don't know how to. I haven't watched enough of your videos to know when you started school and what year you were in but I believe especially in the beginning of a semester making friends as a student is very easy because of all the new people moving to a town, being away from friends and family and looking for new friends themselves. And there are usually so many first semester and newcomer activities. You do have to know about them though. Going to a sports club can be extremely helpful as well. There you can find locals that share an interest with you which is always a great topic to talk about.
I loved this video, but I'm actually loving these positive responses to the video from Germans and everyone else even more!
Cannot wait for our family to visit Germany next year, from Australia. ❤
You're so charming, and this is such a wholesome channel. Thank you for sharing your experiences with us.
I'm German and lived here all my life. I visited many countries including Vietnam and the US and think every country and society has its pros and cons. German people are in many ways more relaxed than they used to be. For example making noise on Sundays or not separating your trash may annoy some people but there are very few who get angry. Most people just don't care. And there are more chatty people than you might think. They may be surprised at first, but my husband for instance can easily talk to almost everyone. I'm more reserved though and need more time but that's my personality and has nothing to do with my German origin 😊
The no reaction to noise on Sunday is probably a misconception on your part. It's not that people don't care, they just don't want to bother getting out of their house and having their time wasted telling someone else to keep it the fuck down. So they try to ignore it, but it's always done with a clenched fist.
@@Quotenwagnerianer I'm German too and depending on the type of noise I really don't mind.
I love your videos. It is a mammoth task to leave your country and take on normal life challenges like study and a new relationship. You have done well, and I admire your relationship. I love your videos. You have a great sense of humour, and you have great insight, and what you lack, your boyfriend seems to make up. Keep up the great work. I hope you both can come to visit Australia one day.
I like your bright outlook and encouraging sayings.
I went to Germany when I was 17…after I finished school…After 26 years I can say it was not easy but it was the best experience of my life 🥰🥰🇩🇪🇩🇪🥰🥰…just try to improve your German!😅
In my experience the biggest difference with Europe compared to other countries (including southern Europe actually) is that if for whatever reason you end up very poor there's a limit on the deprivations and misery you can end up in (which has a huge impact on crime, mental health, corruption, etc) but yeah it's definitely difficult to notice as a foreigner because generally foreigners do not have access to such basic income welfare
Hi Uyen and German boyfriend! Thank you for your videos. I enjoy them all and am grateful for you both! ❤
Ich liebe deine Videos so sehr. Danke, dass du sie mit uns mitteilst!
I love how excited you are about the stabilo
I gotta say out of all videos that I have watched about moving to Germany, yours are the one that I can relate the most. Thank you for sharing your story. Hopefully my time here in Germany will get better as the time passes by! I am taking my DSH exam soon and hopefully I will pass it and stay longer here in Germany. It is a beautiful country but it takes time to see its true beauty.
I'm a bit more outgoing and, for a German, quite talkative. I often talk to strangers, on the train, on the street, in a shop, whereever - and of course there a people who find that weird, I don't really care. More often people actually seem interested in a small talk. I suggest to start conversations with questions about things or procedures, most will be comfortable about that. And don't ask about how they are doing - if you don't want to get told in great length and detail!
In contrast, if you ever have the chance to go northern Europe you will see how much more open Germans are. I was traveling in Denmark last month and always felt like I was too loud, too fast, too colourful and my gestures and facial expressions were also kinda too much for the Danes. It felt like no breathing room whatsoever...
In USA, North Georgia mountains. I have so enjoyed listening and watching your videos, the humor, hearing your difficulties, and your triumphs. It must have been very strange transitioning from Vietnam to a place like Germany! I am an immigrant (N. Ireland to USA) and while I did not experience having to learn another language, still, the cultural differences were epic! Our family was more formal and strict and American families the opposite - as a result, in school, the other children would call me and my siblings "stuck up" - our Irish schooling was far superior and at a young age, we were reading classical literature, while here, it was deplorable and American children were far behind us. My teachers in US would make me read to the class - which made the other children hate me! LOL Having said all that, there is definitely a cultural divide, differing ways of communicating and differing acceptable behaviors. So, long story short, I feel for you! You have done amazingly well. Good for you - sometimes being ignorant of the challenges ahead is all for the better! Thanks for your videos - I do enjoy them all!
I live in the north Georgia mountains too. It's changed alot in the last few years. What county? I've lived here for about 10 years
Im German and I think we can be chatty if you talk to us in the right circumstances. We wont like being randomly stopped outside to be talked to, but if your joining some sort of hobby group or class people will be more open. Or if your a student there are usually a lot of events where you could go to chat to people
Yeah I think setting is everything.. don't expect to find friends in a grocery stores or during your daily commute, seek friends specifically at hobby groups, sports and other things, where people are going to seek company! Smalltalk and meeting people will be easy and fun there.
Coming from a small community, I would often visit on walks and in the grocery store because I don’t enjoy being inside amongst crowds and it became worse with COVID.
I agree! I always like to bring the example of dog owners. Even I, a very shy person and massive introvert, have no problem chatting with other dog owners that I meet on walks.
The reasons seem obvious: we already have something in common and the focus is not on ourselves, but on the dogs. I think that definitely helps. :)
I'm German too, and you're correct.
I am not German but I find it so normal that people make new connections only in the right circumstances. To my advantage though I come from Northern Europe myself. I know it’s partly luck but I had nearly only good experiences here in Germany. I must say, however, I think that speaking German well or at least a bit is a very important factor. Personally I find it normal. And most Germans react very sweet when they are impressed with your language skill 😊 und mein Deutsch ist überhaupt nicht das Gelbe vom Ei 😅
It was interesting to hear how you found "The West" as a Vietnamese. I had the opposit experience living in Vietnam as a Hungarian. It was so dishartening and frustrating that everyone always said yes or what they thought you wanted to hear and you never knew what they ment or what they will actually do. I never met as many pathological liars as I did in Hanoi😂 Also, bureaucracy is slow in Vietnam as well, except when you know the right people and have money, just like everywhere else BUT they do deliver whole ass fridges on the backs of the skinniest guys on a motorbike right away😂
I wouldn’t call them liars. It’s just culture. They are just very private with their thoughts and feelings and prefer to put the feelings and needs of the group above themselves. At least they are expected to. The US has an issue with directness, particularly if it’s from a person of color. And with everyone in competition with each other, being direct with your thoughts and feelings put you in a disadvantage. It’s a power thing too.
A lot people in Asia actually not gonna saying they hate you in your face. They gonna making bombastis side eyes, avoid you, making it clear that they never want to see you etc.
@@hermitwatcher8997 I didn't mean the patholigical liars as a joke, or a generalization. I ment 5 actual ppl, 1 I dated and me and all his friendgroups knew him as a different person, the other was the girl he ended up marrying because he got her pregnant and another was a fellow Hungarian. Never met such twisted ppl before BUT that is not the norm for Viet ppl. I met many really friendly and unbeleavably kind/generous individuals. However, overall I was tired and jaded from living in Vietnam as a student and also as a white woman open to dating. I respect their hustle, but I wasn't cut out for navigating their way of doing things.
There's a reason why the hashtag #hanoiing exists. They have a reputation for "chặt chém" overcharging and ripping off customers. While I've met many Hanoians who've been kind and friendly, I've never come across as many overtly mean and impolite people as I've met in Hanoi. It's bizarre because everywhere else in VN, people are generally warm and friendly and helpful. Also, no matter where I've been in VN, the Hanoians seem to have a reputation for being jerks, even amongst Hanoians themselves. When I try and figure out the root of some of the negative stereotypes I've come across (harsher northern environment, a longer history of deprivation cf. the south etc), my local friends and family will say, "No, it's just cause they're jerks."
"Pathological liars" - ditto for Bangladesh!
People always say whatever sounds good to you without meaning it. Also extremely shady & passive-aggressive.
Love your honesty in this video Uyen! I watch a video just yesterday about a French girl who studied Norweigian and lived in Norway for only 3 years and she was fluent in Norwegian. She explained that she spent a lot of time listening to the language through podcasts and radio in every spare moment or when her hands were busy and her mind was free. She read books with audio and practiced repeating after them, she watched tv/movies with Norwegian subtitles, it sounded super intense, but it worked well for her. I'm sure you will do well too with German Boyfriend's help 😊
Good job making it to class and not crying. We are all rooting for you. 😊
"He's a silly little goose" : that's so sweet. 💛
I enjoy German honesty, as an autistic person I can handle a direct way of speaking so much better and find it actually so helpful compared to the more superficial and polite communication styles.
I recently moved to a foreign country. Although my situation is not exactly like yours, I feel the same about many things you said...and it's reassuring to know that there are many people like us trying the best to learn, adjust, and make the most of it!
unrelated but i've been really enjoying your longer videos lately! especially the one where you talked abt cultural differences between between living in the 2 different countries + eating german bf's german food for a day! :D there's just a very comfy vibe
I remember having those pens in school! Never thought I'd see them brought up as a positive of living in Germany
These pens are the best!!
@@uyenninhI love how enthusiastic you are about the pens, good pens are a true joy 😍
what is the brand called. I hear it as gatzen and i get no hits!?
@@BoPeterssonit's Stabilo...
@@BoPetersson stabilo point
I don't know what it's like over there, but where I live there are groups for practicing English as well as language exchange groups for French, Spanish, Italian etc. It's a nice way to practice without feeling the pressure of a class and it's honestly the best way to improve listening which I'd consider to be the hardest language skill.
Oh - and here in Poland, I love your Germany colored pencils. Quality is great! Also markers. I'll have to check into those pens. A nice pen brightens any day!
It’s never easy to build a new home on the foreign ground. And I know what I’m talking about 😁
Just keep going, make new friends, learn the language, create your emotional maps of the cities, fill them with your memories and one day you’ll have YOUR Germany 😉
What I do not understand about all the complaining here: she really has it much easier than other foreigners, having a German boyfriend who can explain everything to her, who certainly has German friends who are willing to befriend her too, and she should definitely start practising her German with him then it would improve really fast. By the way I as a German know the feeling of living in a foreign country as I studies for half a year in France and I had nobody to explain the rules to me!
I'm an Australian who married a Finn and moved to Finland, and I was a little prepared for the culture shocks as I've visited here several times before actually moving, but a lot of the struggles seem quite familiar! It's hard to make friends with Finns as they tend to be fairly withdrawn, and I live in a small town so there aren't as many organised social things I could attend, and not everyone is confident in English. I do speak some Finnish but Finnish is even harder to learn than German so I'm pretty ropey at it (I'm a German citizen and learned German for 3 and a half years in school, although you couldn't exactly say I was fluent - it's just an easier language to learn as a native English speaker). And the darkness really messes with your circadian rhythm. Probably the warnings I'd give people moving to Finland are a) Finnish bureaucracy can be really stupid and very difficult to navigate if you don't have a native Finnish or Swedish speaker to help you as quite a lot of services aren't available in English. I'm lucky enough to have my wife to help me. b) It can be quite difficult to find work here if you aren't a fluent Finnish speaker. So far I haven't found any, although in my case it's because I live in a small town. I'm sure it's nice to come and study here as a lot of the universities are English language, and cost of living and rent are lower than they would be in Australia, the immigration policy is considerably kinder than it is in Aus and you get a better standard of housing than you would in Australia. So I still feel very lucky and happy to be here, but it's not the easiest country to move to.
First, in Finland and the rest of the nordic countries it is expensive for the governement to reach out in a language that is not a legal obligation. Translation of all the different papers and such is expensive. Sweden has five minority languages and English is none of them. It can be very risky if anyone guides you in a language that might set you up in a legal conundrum. Why should countries that doesn't speak English serve you in your native language? Should we also translate our laws to French, German, Spanish and Mandarin?
Second, do your best to learn Finnish, both writing and speaking. So you can manage on your own instead of relying on your partner for everything.
And go on a roadtrip alone in the summer, visit the museums, learn about the history and the people.
@@Mjao519 I think western countries should be obliged to have everything also in English. We live in a very globalized world, and English has become, at least in this part of the world, the true lingua franca. And as such, we need to use it. I am from the Czech Republic, and I used to teach the Czech language to foreigners coming to our country because I think it is great to be able to communicate, read the news and literature, enjoy chats with locals, etc., in the language of the country you are visiting. And, let's be honest, parts of the Czech (or any other native) culture cannot be passed to other people without the language in which it originated. I have also translated books from English to Czech, and I am busy communicating science to our general public, mostly in Czech, because I know that not everyone here is able to enjoy these things in English. However, I also believe that my country should be able to communicate in English in every vital area of their citizen's and visitors' lives and that all of our children should be taught English in schools. And we should be encouraged and have more possibilities to learn the English language well. Having one language brings us closer together, and it is criminal to ignore it. I have nothing against learning other languages (I am a native Czech speaker, I mostly communicate in English on the internet and partly at work, but I also studied French, and I am now taking Duolingo classes in Polish (for work reasons), German and Spanish (I find it useful) and Korean (just for fun)), and especially the language of the country you are coming to (I might be living in Poland for a few years, if everything goes according to plans, hence the Polish - although I can speak solely in English with my colleagues), but still, it should be a "nice to have", not "absolutely have to have". English is the latter.
@@JelenaBraum Thank you for your opinion. I disagree. Nordic countries have passed through hundreds of years, never forgetting their own language. But the lingua franca has changed. Medieval? Latin. Hanseatic? German. Romantic? French. Why English? Why should our adminstrators, judges, politicans, be chosen on bases of how well they can translate our daily administration and lawpractice, to English? We do not speak English in our offices, on our lunchbreaks or in the printer room on our workplaces. Just notice how bad I can present myself, just here and now! Not dignified.
I applaud you for having the diligence to learn other languages. I’m from the Detroit, Michigan in the United States. Friends in my circle have attended universities and have traveled but most visit English speaking countries despite having studied a foreign language in high school or in college. I have observed that Americans are very resentful of people who have pronounced foreign accents when speaking English. It is because in our vast country one can travel from one coast to another and only speak English. A great many people have not travelled outside if the US. Many years ago when I visited German many signs at bus/train station were in multiple languages. Even in New York, our most cosmopolitan city, it is rare to find signage in multiple languages.
As a German living in America you are right we do not smile and we do not need to smile for everyone , we are different with our friends and family
Yeah we can always tell the Germans because they look miserable
Complete 360. As an American, we are smiling and friendly to everyone. At least here in Florida.
@@Squidwardsangryface Same with Malaysia! I was shocked when I moved to Switzerland.
Yes I only smile to old ppl, Kids, Animals, Familiy and Friends
@@Squidwardsangryface Just because someone is not smiling and not open to talking to people, it doesn't mean they are unfriendly, it's neutral. There is friendly, neutral, and unfriendly. In order to become friendly or unfriendly, something has to shift the mood to those things. If nothing shifts the mood, then neutral is the default state. This is how I often try to explain things as a Romanian person living in the US - I'm not mad, but nothing major has happened to shift my mood to overtly friendly. Something about the neutrality seems to bother people here and I am not sure what it is?
Americans can be very friendly. Not all Amercians are friendly or extroverted. Canadians are very friendly. English are friendly with their mates(friends), but they won't approach strangers for a chat like Americans and possibly Canadians. Really Amercians are the only ones I know that will approach strangers and chat for the sake of chatting.
That because u dont know souther Italians 😊
@@serenaviolante917 I have to admit I haven't met any southern Italians. Maybe someday I will visit southern Italy.
@@ivylovesrunning we are friendly and Just chat and hug people and welcome everybody...when I went to Vienna recently I wanted to cry people where so coollld🥲
If you want really friendly(sometimes to the point of being kind of uncomfortable) Canadians, then you're looking at Newfoundlanders. Those people will invite a stranger in to have dinner and stay the night, chat with anyone they meet, and are responsible for everyone thinking we say "Eh!" all the time.
@@LucMarcelle we invite strangers to dinner too 😂😂😂
Funnily enough, you only have to go hiking on a mountain in Bavaria and you are in a completely different German society. Every person you meet on the way greets you and you talk about how far you still have to go. When you get to the top, you share the same table at the mountain hut and get into conversation. I love the feeling of experiencing so much warmth every time. It's so strange that when you get to the valley, hardly anyone is like that. Especially not in cities.
My Italian husband and I (British) immediately noticed how much more Bavarians smile, even in towns, compared other Germans. He always insists it's because they're catholic!
Yes Bavaria! Soo true much more outgoing and friendlier
Ever since i started to watch your chanell i noticed how many similarities there are with germany and macedonia 😂
Hello Uyen, thanks for this honest video ❤my heart is with you, i can understand your feelings about the germans. But i must say, the most important thing to make friends here is to speak our language. I tell you this because i made the same experience in Spain. I love Spain, but to connect to the people, speaking their language is the most important thing. So much people think that speaking english is the best solution, because we learn this in school, but that’s not true. maybe i think this way, because learning spain since a few years opened up my eyes, how difficult it is to learn a different language as an adult. Te best greetings from a German woman, it would be an honor for me to know such a strong woman as you❤Take care of yourself
Thank you for everything you do for this channel. I migrated to Germany during Covid and your experiences make mine feel much less lonely ❤
I absolutely adore Uyen❤This clever gal brings a smile to my face when she relays her experiences👍
I've heard people say "It's hard to make friends with a German, but if you do, you have a friend for life". Overall I think it's just a different communication style and Germans mostly do tend to want to form deeper, long lasting relationships.
When I was young my dad's boss here in Ireland was German. The nicest person, so was his wife.
But you need to do it while in kindergarten. After that most Germans are not excepting new friends any more :) my opinion after 10+ years here
@@tuilien Not really true.
@@yasmine4754yes it is
The same thing they say about Poland
Just leaving a comment to say I love your videos and you can be really proud of yourself! I’m from the German speaking part of Europe and spent some time in China and another East Asian country. During my first trip in China I felt like for the first time in my life I understood what it must mean to be a foreigner in Europe and how hard it is. So many unwritten rules, different habits and customs one is not yet familiar with, and so many traps one can walk into!
I don't think Germans are cold, I'm Asian in Germany too, if you know how to use your sense of humour or be friendly I think they can be very funny & nice. I made so many German friends here. Plus those Asian fakeness of always smiling made me tired. I appreciate strangers in public say hello or giving a smile to me here
It's interesting hearing your struggles with learning German! I have a very hard time learning new languages, and German made the most sense to me- but I think it's because my native langauge is English, which borrows heavily from German. I took it for 4 years back in college. It's been a long time, but I still remember a good bit of it! Keep it up, you’ll get there 💪
I think nobody should feel bad for having a wrong image of any place from the media you consume.
It's hard to accurately portray a place diversely in the first place, and of course you have a hard time to understand it within the parameters you know.
Thats how it works for all of us, and it's not just "east" and "west", it is a phenomenon that happens between lots of parts in the world and even countries that aren't even far apart like Germany and Italy.
We're all different, things are diverse and we shouldn't feel bad about needing time to understand and adjust.
Thank you so much for sharing your experience. You are an incredible woman, and think of having your business someday. You can do it! Go girl!
This is so relatable to all of us who moved halways across the world as a student and build a life from scratch away from all of our loved ones. You're lucky you had your boyfriend there already and that was supportive in a time of huge change in your life
I love watching you! Thank you for being so real and interesting! Love from Florida/US.
Thank you so much for all of your videos! My gf wants to move to Germany where I live and she's from the US - this is gonna be quite the wild ride I suppose. She's very good with picking up on learning German though! Your videos really help us get a better idea of how it might be like, it's very helpful!
I'm from the UK where the need for niceties and politeness can make it hard to read people's genuine feelings. I love germans for their directness, it's much easier to navigate relationships when people are honest and upfront!
My sister lived in Germany for 20 years and somehow adopted their directness, not a great thing when she joined me to live in Canada 😂 people here are very very polite and kinda reserved when it comes to express their feelings and most of the times my sister is misunderstood. Does it affect her daily socializing? Not at all, people who get to know her love her, she has more Canadian friends than I do..(I have been in Canada since 2000)
What I’m trying to say is just be yourself and people will like you for your genuineness..
Of course it would be good to be fluent in German, but your English is great, and you are using that to earn a living, so don't be hard on yourself because you only have basic words in German, Well done for learning ANOTHER language at all!
"Showing up and not crying in class" Yep. So true. From a fellow language learner 😊
This video was very relatable and made me laugh a lot! Especially the comment about Sundays! 😂😂😂
Think about how much or rather how little Vietnamese foreigners who live in Vietnam speak. I think you're doing great with your German! And yes I agree, there's so many things one wishes one knew before moving to a country with a different culture. You live, you learn!
Plus the accent thing. I went to Guatemala to learn Spanish and some of the people I learned the most from were Asians in Guatemala to learn Spanish.
Also, 4 years isn't that long as far as learning languages go. If I try to think about what I was able to say and understand in English after 4 years of class, it really wasn't a lot. Of course, I didn't live there, but still, the beginnings are always kind of slow, and we tend to forget them when we are fluent after 10, 15 or 20 years. Once you reach the point where you can confidently have conversations in German and watch TV, it becomes easier to practice without noticing it, but getting to that point is hard and takes a lot of time and effort for most people (I met two persons in my life who were able to reach a super impressive level in less than a year, but, well, us mere mortals don't seem to be able to do that, and that's OK).
Hi uyen!Your Vietnam content has made me realised that I'm not the only one that can relate to thank you ❤️
Parents in general change their attitude when you move out, me and my boyfriend moved to another city, and mine and his parents completely changed.
“It’s never too late to start something.”
Thanks Uyen, that means a lot for me.
I finished my Master degree in 2022 then I took a “break” because of the stress of the pandemic and my father died during that time while I couldn’t even visit him because of the hard choices: visit him, or not getting any degree at all (my masters got from aboard also).
I was so burnt out such that I don’t even know what to do. Yet still managed to work as freelance for my own bill.
Now, it almost 2 years prior. I already set my mental readiness to continue pursuing my doctorate degree in Germany. I hope I can be there during spring 2024 at Stuttgart (Max Planck Institute).
Salam,
_Moch From Indonesia 🇮🇩
As a westerner who wants to move to Vietnam this is really useful actually! Realizing that there are other people taking the leap to live abroad and that it’s not easy for anyone makes me feel better about my own worries.
It has been so great to watch how much your content has matured. It was fun in your earlier work, but now I am more interested in your insight. Best to you and your sweetheart.
Uyen, I totally understand the thing about German classes and trying desperately not to cry in class. I can't count the amount of times I signed off, or went home, and went immediately to wherever my husband was and just sobbed. "I can't do this! I'll never be able to speak this language! I'll never understand anything!" I can promise you that, although it doesn't really get any easier, it's totally possible. I just got my C2 earlier this year, so I'm living proof. It's a lot of work, sweat, and tears, but I believe in you. You can do this!
Congratulations! I'm german and I think C2 is something You can be really proud of! Good Job!
@@Kosty19 Thank you! ♥️
I really love your videos. You are so down to earth and funny and you seem to have such optimism about everything even when it seems hard or disappointing. It just makes me feel good to see a couple that are clearly in love and so supportive of each other. Thank you for bringing a bright spot and optimism to my days.
This lady is a cure for everything mean on the internet. Thank you Uyen for being your lovely self :)
I love your channel because you are honest about how things are the good the bad and the ugly side of things and that is why i think your content is so interesting and YES you are funny on top of it. For me I see you as brave for leaving your country and starting a new life, keep going you are on the right path.♥
I am sure you will learn German. One day you will suddenly have a full conversation without feeling stressed. 😊 Du schaffst das!
Also when it comes to things happening fast: That changed in the past couple of years. I am German, but moved abroad about 9 years ago and appointments taking ages is one of the things I noticed had changed. It used to be much shorter waiting times to see a specialist. Your videos are always so funny 😅
You’re amazing, you’ve achieved so much!!
I think this video is good for westerners going to Vietnam too! Or, in my experience, going to many Asian cultures- especially about being indirect, in Australia we’re not as direct as Germans but also I’ve found that Asian people can be difficult to read their true feelings sometimes. ❤
I love your dinosaur jumper. So cute. And I agree - good on you for showing up consistently to your German classes and not crying, even though it is so difficult.
The best thing about your videos is that I can understand every word! this is how I improve my English! And of course I like your topics too. You're adopted...uh, no, what was that called? oh yes, subscribed.lg
You are spot on with your observations. I just returned to Germany after two decades in the US and experienced all this in reverse culture shock. The bureaucracy has no rival in the western world. I do feel at Home here, though, and will have to learn again to cope.
Be proud. You deserve it. You’re the one that’s adorable. Your ability to share quips off the cuff show a wonderful gift of gab. As a wife if a Dutchman, I understand the directness you describe. Also, I’m a smiler to strangers so what you mentioned in just walking around would be depressing. I also cycle and say hello to pretty much everyone I pass by on the trails. Keep up the honest content. All the best!
I give you a lot of credit! Moving to such a different place than your used to has to be difficult in so many ways. Good luck with your German classes! Your videos are great. I've learned a lot about both Vietnam and Germany from you. The kitchen thing blows my mind😂
Love your videos and your insights into both German and Vietnamese culture, and your relationship with German boyfriend. Id love to hear more about your progress in learning German. Especially if you considered making shorts or something in German for those of who are also learning. I find a lot of stuff designed for language learners a bit disheartening bc the people who are in them are so good, so I think it would be cool to listen to someone who is also learning, and maybe it would be good practice /confidence boosting for you too 😊😊
Thanks for all the great stuff you make, look forward to watching more regardless of where you take the channel ❤
German classes only bring you so far, I recommend to joins activities or classes on things you like (maybe arts, or sports) where you are forced to speak and only listen to German. That will give you the feeling of the language. When I lived in Paris for a year I did not improve my skill much until I joined the university and I was sitting in lectures, it was so hard the first 6 months but in the end you make immense progress
I really enjoy the videos of your perspective. You get an A++ for bravery.
From my perspective as a German one negative consequence of indirect communication is that it makes me sort of think that it can turn people hypervigilant, so not smiling means a lot more in other cultures than here. I personallywould feel uncomfortable knowing someone is just smiling at me because they think I am expecting them to smile or be friendly. Especially when I don’t know them, they don’t owe anything to me.
But I do see conversations going smoother and sometimes situations being handled quicker when everyone is just a little more polite to each other.
Great video! I have been following along silently for several months from Oklahoma USA. I love your videos. It gives me something to laugh and smile over!
I came to Germany with my family at age 5. I went to Kindergarten and School here and German is in fact my second language but in reality my first. I think, I am fully integrated but in spite of everybody saying that I am practically German, I assure you, I am not. My parents come from Southamerica and we came here as refugees. I learned German culture in school which is different than having German family history and roots. I am influenced by the German way of thinking and I am not good at the indirect way of communicating. My mom still communicates that way and it either goes over my head or it makes me grumpy and impatient because I don't understand why she cannot just say what she wants and expects me to read her mind or guess what she means.
Over the years I have met many Southamericans who came to Germany to study or find a new life with their German partners and my observation has always been that not learning German from the beginning makes it so much more difficult to adapt to the different culture. Of course, it is a shock and the "coldness" gets to you. Also, families are much closer in my country than in Germany and friends are often like family members. Everybody just comes by whenever they want or need to, nobody calls first. If you are eating and get unexpected visitors you just invite them without hesitation or feeling disturbed. This sounds warm and cozy, friendly and peaceful BUT when you are used to Germany you can also see the negative side of it: everybody is in everybodies business, you are never alone and surrounded by different people all the time and it is difficult to plan anything. For me that is quite stressful. I need my alone time and I want to be able to plan my time and I don't want everybodies opinion on my life choices 🙂.
This is just one aspect of it. There is also a different emotional world behind German and Spanish and I need to be flexible.
So, as much as I understand the difficulties of people from other countries having to adapt to a perceived harsher environment, "colder" temperaments and feeling lonely when no longer surrounded by family and friends, I would love to tell everybody in that situation: The sooner you learn German (and you don't need to be perfect, just fluent enough to express yourself and understand other people) the sooner you will start to feel more at home. You will find friends, even if it takes some time, and you do not need to let go of your individuality as a person from another country. Most Germans I have met really appreciate to learn about other countries, try different food and they will embrace you being different and let me tell you: Germans are very lovely, considerate and loyal friends!
As a German that lived abroad in Latin America for a while, I totally understand what you mean. After coming back to Germany I had quite a hard time communicating directly again.
I definitely relate to the visa issues, medical waits, and the improved relationship with parents moving abroad.. love your videos, theyre my comfort vids ❤
You should have come to Ireland. We have our own problems but only one of those you mentioned - you will wait forever for furniture/appointments with specialists etc. But almost everybody smiles and it's natural to us, most people are eager to talk to strangers, few of us are confrontational and, of course, we speak English.
Agree. I'm a huge Ireland fan and have visited your beautiful island at least 15 times. Was just there in October and chatted with so many people. At the local market, pub, grocery store, lol. Irish people are really friendly and love to chat, but at the same time, have a polite manner to them. 💚🤍🧡
@@erato7140 Really glad you enjoyed Ireland. Hope you come back soon.
I have to say I really love your long form videos. It’s so great that you can ger much more in depth with the topics of the videos. Thanks a lot Uyen :)
im from the US and moved to the German part of Switzerland 12 years ago. I can relate to a lot from this video. the only way I found to really improve German was to avoid English speaking people and force myself on the Swiss haha. was not easy, figuratively or emotionally, but it worked out well!
Another FUN and WONDERFUL and INFORMATIVE video from Uyen. I think that this type of video would be sooop helpful for anyone thinking of moving to Germany.
I wish I had more friends from different cultures.
I didn't intend it. Growing up I liked ping-pong. I went to college 10 hours from my house, didn't know anyone and so went to game rooms to play table tennis. Instantly all my friends were from very different cultures. Normal American high school and I had zero knowledge to tell apart someone from Laos, Malaysia, Mymar, Thialand...so now if you are looking for others in different cultures, perhaps look to what hobby would put you with a more diverse selection of people.
do you live in a bigger city in a non-english speaking country? then you can try to find classes that teach a skill that interests you in english. that usually means that people from different countries will join. i did a coding course in english here in berlin and since then i have so many international friends from all over the world, it's really cool!
@@robopecha I live in a very small village. I do speak relatively good english.
I feel so at home with you! I think you are actually a Californian!
I feel for you and am so happy you have a loving boyfriend to help you have warmth and closeness and laughter!
You remind me of what it was like growing up with my German grandparents in the US. So scary! Mean faces. Harsh voices. Scolding all the time. Spanking. Obsessed with bowel movements! So many rules to remember. Always afraid I was breaking one I didn't know about. Good at criticism and expecting perfection. Great at expressing disapproval but not good at expressing vulnerable emotions. Sentimental was as close as they got.
Real gratitude and forgiveness were not in their toolbox. Compassion is not a thing. Empathy is weakness. Etc.
Now after much therapy, I have l learned to see that is how I was treating myself and to find the opposite qualities that I needed within my self.
I now have so much compassion for those poor emotionally armored people.
They too learned to protect themselves from coldness by becoming even more impenetrable.
I also learned to hide my real feelings and thoughts in a SE Asian way, being indirect, non-confrontational and accommodating.(One friend describes it as "never ripple the pond")
These are all survival strategies that have been perfected over 100's of years.
As you so adorably and wisely and humorously illustrate, we are here to let these strategies go at last.
Time to be our true loving tender and caring selves.
And help others to break free!!!
Imagine, you are melting German resistance to the very thing they long for and are terrified of. Warmth!❤
This is a nice video, thank you so much for sharing with us 😍❤️
I think learning the language will help a ton with making friends and talking more to strangers. I moved to the Netherlands to study and when I only spoke english I hardly had any dutch friends. Once I really, really put in an effort to learn the language I made many friends here. People want to speak their native language, especially when hanging out in a group. If one person only speaks english, the whole group has to accommodate them. Many germans also do not actually speak english that well or are self conscious about it. Try to get your boyfriend to only speak german to you, read german (childrens) books or comics, take some more classes. There is always the awkward stage of not being able to express yourself well when learning a new language. But to get better you have to power through and it WILL get better. Best of luck to you with everything!!!
And that is exactly why we need people like you to come here. To tell us what is not as good as we might think and, maybe, to help us make it better. Thank you for being with us.
But the story of German efficiency is a tale of yore... it has been devoured by bureaucracy.
Is it true that you have to pay a tv and radio tax regardless of whether you even have one of those and everyone is just ok with that? 😭
Yes. Since both can be accessed via internet, not owning the device does not mean that you don't have to pay the tax. So you all pay it. It's cheaper, however, if you live in a WG - a shared apartment. Basically- there are different tax categories even for our radio tax@@morgianasartre6709
@@morgianasartre6709 , it is true. Sometimes I think Germans are like soldats. They don't claim in demos that don't agree with such payments or do anything against it. There should be many that can afford it. I personally find it bad.
@@julsmatka4313 Yeah it's still a weird and rather expensive fee for something that many people might not utilise at all. And I don't really see how it can guarantee unbiased media, as long as it is run by people there will always be a level of bias.
@@julsmatka4313 Well, at least you say the selection is ok, is it enough that one doesn't have to buy additional tv channel package if they watch tv?
Uyen, I am very proud of you as that is a huge culture shock coming from Vietnam to Germany, but in my opinion you are doing incredible and it's a joy watching you grow and blossom to who you are today vs four years ago. I can relate to you when it comes to leaving family and friends and hoping to maintain good contact thanks to technology but as for you it did not work out for me either - so you are not alone. German is a hard language to learn but remember it's the fact that you haven't given up is what makes you a winner, I do recommend Duolingo which will help in between your German class! Keep on smiling and with time everything will fall into place :)