Yeah, it's a healing. What could be more valuable than that. Let's not forget about all these people that open their heart and share those painful raw things that resonate with us as viewers. Tells us "hey, you're not alone".. I especially appreciate those that dare share their uglyness/ things they're not proud of.. For me personally, it is MUCH harder to be faced, let alone talk about my ugly side, then it is to talk about the uglyness that was done to me.. Thoraya has created a healing platform where we can all feel human and recognize we're not alone. It's MAJOR.
but like some people REALLY have great relationships w their family siblings and have real friends and idk but i always wish they had a kinda sad thing in their life ik it's a really bad thing to wish for this is probably because they literally look like they're having the best times of their life i wanna be there someday
@@august-bl1jh I understand but trust me every one has some thing or the other shit, no one has it all. It's just hard man, Idk you reap what you sow please be careful of what you wish for others.
"Healing from trauma is not linear ", might be the most perfect insightful reminder I've ever known to touch my path from utube especially! Thank u Thoraya thank u so much sister! 💓
True.. Bcus ive went thru the same shit with ex bf. But i left him for my mental well-being (otherwise i wudve killed myself first) and he's still alive.😌🙂
Unfortunately it's not always just a manipulation tactic. When I was in highschool and broke up with my boyfriend he overdosed and although he survived he went from being an honors student to being mentally retarded for the rest of his life and that burden is alot to live with. When I visited him in the hospital he was so messed up that he tried to read the card I got him upside down. It was heartbreaking.
@@Alessastarz fuckkkk! 😳 that's sucks. I stayed with the guy who said he would kill himself if I left after only about 4 mnts together in 10th grade. 9 1/2 years and every punch, slap, push, cheating, sexual assault, verbal abuse, locked in room, gun pointed at me, and so much more. I wish I would've left when I wanted to at 4 mnts. I never told anyone. Not my family bc I was scared my dad would kill him. I didn't even tell my best friend not even now 12 yrs after. Please remember that you don't control what others think or do. It was his choice to do that not yours. At such a young age we tend to try and protect one another from getting into trouble by parents or authorities so we don't say anything I hopes nothing goes wrong. If you have kids please always let them know that they can come to you about anything even if they think it will cause trouble. So how you react to them when they themselves do something will pave the road of if they fill safe in telling you in some cases maybe. I never told my parents bc I didn't want them to be disappointed in me for some reason for not coming to them when it first happened. Also I didn't want them to carry that pain of knowing their little girl was going thru something like that or guilt for not knowing. I was good at hiding everything. I'm with a good man now who shows me everyday what love is suppose to feel like from a man. He is my best friend. Now you know my secret. Thanks for sharing your story. 🤗 hugs and love from me!!!
@@Alessastarz His suicide attempt was actually the ultimate in manipulation. As long as you feel guilt in regards to him he is still manipulating you. His current state is on him not you
I really loveeeee this project, allowing people telling things they are not comfortable or are scared saying out loud, gives them, I think, some sort of relief!! Keep this amazing work up, Thoraya❤️
If anyone is staying in a relationship (or friendship) with someone who threatens or implies they would kill themselves or "not be alive without you/this relationship" you need to leave that relationship/friendship. It will NOT be your fault if they do something to themselves, and a lot of the time they're using it to manipulate you. It is not fair of them to put their issues and things they refuse to manage on their own, onto you. That THEIR stuff to handle, not yours.
Question, do we have to just left or like talk to them first and then leave? I have been told this advice very often but im really scared to actually leave them because i actually care about them :(
@@mixzoe6228 well, have you talked to them already about this? Do they listen and try to get help or do they solely depend on you for everything? Often people try to downplay the significance of things, but it becomes very obvious and very clear they do not want anyone but you to help them and they're either staying the same or getting worse and it becomes more taxing on you. You keep trying harder and become more exhausted because you think YOU'RE not doing enough to help them and that's why they're not changing or that's why they're getting worse. If it's getting to that point, if your needs (not wants literally your needs) are not being met but they're making sure theirs are, that's a problem. No talking about it is going to change things. You can care a lot about them, but if they're not reciprocating or respecting you, and are instead gaslighting you or manipulating you into dropping your own life and needs to take care of just them, that's unhealthy.
Unfortunately it's not always just a manipulation tactic. When I was in highschool and broke up with my boyfriend he overdosed and although he survived he went from being an honors student to being mentally retarded for the rest of his life and that burden is alot to live with. When I visited him in the hospital he was so messed up that he tried to read the card I got him upside down. It was heartbreaking.
@@Alessastarz yeah that’s tough but it’s not your fault. You wanted to leave and that’s enough of a reason to leave. He could have 100% gotten help from someone else, his decisions are his, not yours.
@@ana8182 thankyou for your kind words. I tend to self blame in these circumstances but I also kept the boundary and didnt get back together with him bc I knew it would only further complicate things.
Oh wow at 6:57, I completely relate. I have two best friends, and they are the closest friends that I've ever had. They aren't friends with each other, but both of them are friends with other people. Like lots of other people. And I only have them. So I feel guilty about wanting so much of their time at school (only one of them goes to my school) or just in general, but I miss them so much when they are with their other friends for a long time because to me it feels like forever but to them it's nothing because their having fun with others. And I would make other friends but I feel like I don't know how anymore. I just feel like I don't have enough energy to even try making friends anymore, which sounds dumb but it's the best way I can describe it. (And to top it off, my best friend that does go to my school might move an hour and a half away soon. I hope she doesn't, and I'm trying to help her find houses close by but she thinks they will most likely move farther away).
i used to be just like you and surprisingly it didn't end like i thought it would. i thought our friendship was over at some point because i cared too much. once i let them go and started to put myself first our relationship got stronger. i still don't know why maybe my expectations changed and im happy with what i have now.
As a young 30 year old I can say with certainty, the younger generations are smarter, more intune with themselves than my generation and those before them. Realise the Greatness within YOU. Continue to Love Yourselves, acknowledge your higherself and know you are more powerful then you can imagine. Life gets easier as you mature. No one is alone. Including YOU ❤️ We are all loved firstly by ourselves and by many people along the journey of life. 🤗
If you don't have friends, no one can hurt you, and you can't hurt them. I try to make friends, but it never works. I do live my life in kindness, and that helps a lot. It becomes easier over the years. I'm in my 50s now.
These are great as always and a reminder that you're not alone but I would love to see you asking these questions to people in their 30-40s or even 50s and what are their thoughts and feeling about life. Are they happy in their jobs? Are they where they told themselves they would be when they were younger like these people in colleges? Are they happy in their marriage life? Are they married to the person they once wished for? What would you tell younger people to do since they've crossed that phase? Idk just people a little older and their view. Great work Thoraya!
Yes!!I love how these videos give such a sense of solidarity!!🥰 BUT as someone who's not in her 20s anymore,I couldn't agree any more with you on how great it'd be to hear perspectives and issues from people from older age groups too. Cos while yeah majority of viewers may be students,would still be great to know that even as slightly older people,we're not alone.Cos when I relate to some of these issues,it's awful to have"You're too old to still be struggling with that wtf?"mentality after viewing😥😖
@@mikajulius8148 Yes, you are never too old or young to have issues, mentally or any other forms of issues has no age, it can happen to anyone and everyone has their own pace and needs time to heal from me. it's just part of life. Hopefully Thoraya sees this and makes one, that'd be awesome.
@@sweetwarmblanket 100% true about how age doesn't place"boundaries"on issues of any kind.Yeah & tbh I feel like Thoraya's playform in general actually helps quite greatly with the healing process for people featured as well as viewers.So I'm crossing my fingers tightly that she does see it so that healing for older folks' can take place more easily too🤞🏽🌟
I really love, "Read a secret, leave a secret", it HAS TO b cathartic, especially to college students away from home & close friends, to get their true feelings out even if it's thru writing!!! Writing itself can be liberating and you could release a lot of angst built up inside. Remember, EVERYONE, u r as important as the person next to u, there's a reason u r here, and u will find it one day!!! I promise, there ARE BETTER DAYS AHEAD!!! Treat, care, and respect people, the way u would like to b...and the you and the world will start healing!!!
When you feel like your existence or life is pointless, remember this: “Do you really have to be special? Do you really need people's recognition? I don't think so. When it comes to my child... He doesn't need to become great. Why would he have to be better than anyone else? After all, just look at him... He's so cute. He's already great. Because he was... born into this world.” ~ Carla Jaeger
This is a horrible quote. If you aren't special or great, or trying to be either of those things then there really is no point to life. I think one of the reasons so many people struggle with existential questions/depression is because society pretty much conditions you to do nothing of note with your life so most people just drift on through the years and end up becoming empty soulless husks, who in turn make society worse.
@@Weird_dude265 i mean if everyone is special then no one is, right? the point of living life is to enjoy it- special or not special. you don't have to do anything grand when you don't want to. im not saying that you should just do nothing either. just don't feel pressured to please others or to meet what other people's expectations of what special is. and like the quote said, you're already great. just being here right now is enough
@@hymph7357 The point of living life is not to enjoy it. If it was then you would either get high and have orgies all day, be a hermit, or try to be the best in the world at the things you're passionate about, and I'm assuming you don't do those things. Hitler was here, the same way the bum down the street is there. Were they great? No. One was a racist and the other gave up on life. Being here right now is not enough. Do something with your life. Everything I said in my previous comment still stands.
I think it’s true to some extent as to be able to truly love others, you have to be at peace with yourself so that the love you are giving is pure and doesn’t have any dependant or insincere connotations, whether it’s conscious or unconscious.
i love love love when someone mentions how healing isn't linear. it's such an honest misconception, but you never understand until you're there. healing is just life; it's a rollercoaster.
This is an amazing way for people to see that problems are faced by everyone. The best way to get through it is together and with love and compassion!❤️🧡💛💚💙💜
These videos make me feel so human And happy to be human. Sometimes I think we get lost in the pain of the world and forget to enjoy the fact that we’re living. Thank you, Thoraya.
Here's a little list containing some important triggers or hard subjects that are discussed in this video : 0:09 - / 0:47 - / 1:20 - Abuse, (Incest ?) 2:13 - / 3:10 - / 4:01 - Abortion 4:31 - / 5:12 - / 5:15 - / 5:20 - / 5:26 - Emotionally abusive teacher 5:35 - Suicide attempt 5:49 - / 5:59 - / 6:01 - / 6:23 - / 6:28 - / 6:57 - / 7:45 - / 8:17 - / 9:00 - / 9:55 - Sexual trauma I just hope this list might help the ones who need it ♥
these videos give me so much comfort, I don't even really know why. maybe because it shows that a lot of people struggle with the same issues, even tho they don't show it.
These responses were brilliant!! The balance of love, pain, vulnerability and empathy each person showed here is beautiful and I appreciate each person sharing with respect
Gosh, all these young people are sooo kind and wise! You are all just wonderful, how you can relate and try to comfort each other. I feel that in the end, we are all in this together..
One of these secrets was actually exactly the same as my secret. It really hit me hard. I really hope the person who wrote it can get to where I've gotten to because they will feel alot better when they do ❤ healing takes time.
9:56 made me think about how healing from trauma never really stops. It comes in waves. then the person mentioned the same concept after reading the secret. I'm glad I'm not the only one who deals with this issue, it can make you feel kind of guilty for backtracking on progress.
@@wwehht It’s alright, I know that feeling very well. Tho I’m not near that age, i had extreme anxiety to the point I had a panic attack because I was too scared to answer the door. I’m not quite sure how I got past it so I can’t offer too much advice, but having someone there to help push you can help. You’ll freak out at the time but I’m sure you won’t regret it. It’s like exposer therapy, subconsciously put yourself in a situation where you have to talk, y’know?
@@sheilasanchezherrera3064 not much different to be honest, I’m still majorly depressed but I seem to be a lot more aware of my surroundings. Everything used to just feel like a foggy dream that I’d walk through. It’s so weird and I feel bad saying this…but I miss it. If I have to feel this way, I at least want my reality to be blurred-
I just today found this channel but I love it. I recently went to a seminar about aggression and harmony, as I have trouble standing up for what I want. One of the most important messages I brought home from there was that, just because you couldn’t do something or slipped a bit into old patterns, that doesn’t mean you can’t do it and never will, it just means that you will get there, just not yet. Sometimes taking a look back instead of ahead and reminding yourself how far You have come instead of how far you have to go is all you need.
I honestly appreciate this channel and the work you do.. specially for those who are on this... I guess it helps them to get their feelings out there... But I would never ever be able to do this for long.. all the pain and heartbreak will destroy me .
I don’t know why…scratch that I know why…but when strangers tell me they love me or stuff like that it doesn’t do anything for me. It’s super nice and sweet and i love that people are kind enough to try but, you don’t know me. Your supposed “love” for me, is empty. No one wants nor deserves empty love.
I have two secrets that I can't share: 1) my really good friend is being mentally abused at home and I'm one of the only people that she feels safe enough to talk to, It used to be physical and I'm really worried that her or her younger brother will get physically hurt again and I can't help it 2) I came out 4 years ago as non-binary and my grandma keeps on sending me messages saying that "a grandmother and granddaughters love is forever" and I can't help but feel guilty about being non-binary, it feels bad to say but she makes me feel inhuman, but at the same time I feel bad that we can't have that love because of who I am.
I try really hard to convince myself my life is worth something simply bc I’m here. There’s not a degree, amount of money, title or any box I need to check. I’m here, figuring things out the best I can, loving the people who love me, and that’s good enough. I hope that will help someone else too.
I really hope you come to Sacramento or I run into you some where because this would relieve so much. I love you’re videos. I felt so alone for so long but hearing so many relatable things comforts those thoughts. Please don’t ever stop doing these.
This project is so amazing... maybe it helps some of these people to just write it down. Sometimes I just need to share a problem with somebody to deal better with it, talking helps guys ❤️
In my experience the best you can do when you don't feel loved & validated by other people is to always be your best so that you can love and validate yourself while striving to be becoming better!
The first one really got to me. Im afraid to leave my boyfriend too because he might commit suicide. Im only 21 he's 22 and we've together for 3 yrs and im already tired, I feel stuck, im just unhappy. He's tried killing himself 2 times now but did not succeed. I'm what's keeping him alive which is why I cant leave him even though I want out of the relationship. I really don't know what to do, I want to choose me and my happiness but wont be able to live with myself if he hurt himself because of me. Sometimes I wish I could just disappear and never return.
He would be hurting himself because of him not you. Your never at fault for the choices someone else chooses to make. Your boyfriend sounds like he needs serious help he isn’t getting and that sucks. But it’s not on you to give that help to him. Especially at your age.
thats a very heavy situation to be stuck in. i strongly recommend speaking with a mentor or person of trust about it. then it'll also feel less like it only weighs on your shoulders
Each person is responsible for his or her own health and well-being. It is not your job to stay with him for the rest of your natural life to keep him from killing himself. That’s all on him. You should be contacting his family and friends to let them know what he has said and done if they don’t already know about it. Maybe a trusted parent or friend can talk him into pursuing psychiatric treatment or calling a suicide hotline. I know you said he attempted suicide twice already, but I just can’t help thinking that a certain percentage of his actions are just emotionally manipulative BS to keep you from going anywhere. Anyway, his mental health is not your job. Frankly, his threats of violence, even just toward himself if not others, feels like “the biggest red flag in the red flag factory.” He is emotionally abusing you. So put the choice to live or die where it belongs - on your partner. As for you, please consider getting counseling or even just calling a domestic violence hotline. What he’s doing to you is a form of domestic abuse. If you choose to leave him, block him from your life completely, disappear and make sure he doesn’t know where you went. Keep in the back your mind that you might want to get a restraining order against him should you leave.
You need to do what is best for you. He sounds tortured, and by staying with him you’ll only being torturing yourself. He needs help, and you need to love yourself first. Staying with someone out of fear is not okay. & if he threatens to harm himself if you leave, that is emotional abuse. It’s best to get out while you can.
7th grader here. 6:57 I relate to that shit so much. It's insane how you could repress a human emotion like jealousy and just call it a day. I always end up thinking "They have other friends, and so do I.", or "They can be independant, so I can, too." However, I realize that it isn't normal to just stop thinking about it. I like getting things off my chest. It's just a natural thing for me to be able to just talk about something that's troubling me with SOMEbody, but I know it isn't that way for everyone. Whenever I do ask about something that's troubling me (like jealousy, or emotional hurt) with my friends, it feels like a weight has been lifted off of my chest.
what arises in me as I watch this video, is just how much emotional pain, I'm in. I'm dying inside. I'm lonely. I am forever: perpetually alone. never the desired one, never the chosen one, never the wanted one. I'm in hell. suicidal hell. despair rapes my soul. I have nothing to live for. I am raped by the past, and I am terrified of the future. I cannot bear this hell anymore. I am suffocated and drowning: in despair and grief and guilt and regret and rage...
I am going to share my secret here because I feel like I have nobody to talk to. My entire family (extended included) is Mormon but I am a lesbian. I am really afraid to come out to them because I worry that nobody would be accepting, but I really love them and I would actually miss them if I had to run away. I haven’t been diagnosed but I think I’m depressed. It was worse last year and hardly a day would pass before I though about killing myself. I think the only reason I didn’t was because I promised my mom I would never kill myself. I am afraid that it will get worse here again. And everyday I am scared that my dad will find out I like girls and try to change me or something. Once he talked to me about “agendas” and how he doesn’t want me to be manipulated into doing something I don’t want to do (I think he meant being gay) and I really tried not to start crying right in front of him. And again, I truly do love him so I would be devastated if when he finds out, he disowns me or something. And I know for a fact my mom doesn’t think he loves her anymore. I think my whole family needs therapy but there is such a stigma around it, I’m afraid to even bring it up. All the time I tell myself that it would just be easier to kill myself and then I won’t have to worry about anything and I don’t even know what’s keeping me here anymore. (Im sorry this is so long)
I’m so sorry that you are feeling so alone. I hope it helped that you were able to speak this into the world and know that people are here and listening. In my experience the first step to dealing with my own sexuality was accepting it for myself. I don’t have experience being brought up in a religious environment but I remember being terrified of people realising I was gay. What helped me the most was to have a friend that I could be myself with. I looked for someone who was open minded and I told them when I was around 16 years old. Telling this person and them accepting me changed my life. For the first time I allowed that secret part of myself just to be, just to exist and not in my head. The heavy cold feeling i carried around with me felt lighter and for those moments I was with that person I was able to not feel dirty, strange or wrong. It was exhilarating. I then told another person, and another. Slowly I built up a group that knew who I really was, and I realised they loved me as a person and not as a straight person. I was able to get my feelings out, and I spent less and less time trying to hide or trying to pretend. It made me stronger and stronger. Then it went around school, and I was so terrified I tried to run away. I packed a bag stole money from my mom and ran away on a train. This is how my family found out. I was humiliated for a while and they didn’t understand why I reacted that way. But I’ll never forget the feeling. It was sheer terror. I was afraid of the rejection from my family I was afraid a stopper had been removed that I couldn’t put back in. I spoke to my grandad when I first got home and he said to me and I’ll never forget it: “it doesn’t matter what you do, you should never be ashamed of who you are”. I know you may never hear these words from your family so I wanted to share these words with you because I’ve never forgotten that moment. This is who you are, and you can’t change it. But you can change who you allow to love you, and as you grow as a person and the real you starts to come alive, you will draw in new people around you who will love that real you that you are holding inside afraid. And that type of love beats everything you’ve known before, because it makes you feel powerful and brave, and makes your life complete again. I’m so sorry that you’re going through this, but know that I read this, I thought about you and I sent you my strength and my words and extended my hands of friendship. All the best x
@@Asherz1 I do not know how to tell you how much this means to me. Not only what you said, but the fact that you would take the time to help me even though you have no idea who I am. Thank you so much
I feel you. I’m omnisexual and am terrified to tell my parents. I know that they think it’s a sin. Everyday it gets harder to keep this secret. I think eventually the pain of telling will be less than the pain of being silent. I hope both of us find a happy ending ♥️🏳️🌈 I don’t know you and you don’t know me I am your sister and you are mine You are loved and to lose such a beautiful young mind would be a devastation
Look, don't worry too much. I know it's easier for me to tell you that cause i'm not you and i'm here writting this on my computer. If you have a secret, it's ok to keep to yourself. You are not a criminal. You're just a person which is worried about yourself and your family. About the depression, maybe if you live always worried about your sexuality, it will create even more anxiety, fear and nightmares that doesn't exists. First you need to take care of yourself. You're not a burden to anyone!! I say that because i have anxiety, i get depressive and such. We start to imagine situations which might never happen, but it creates inside of us a feeling of despair, lack of air, too much worries and so on. All this pressure needs to go somewhere else. If you feel very sad, very depressive, try to write it all down, doesn't matter what. Try to create an account on Blogger.com. There you can make your private diary. Don't ever think, just write it down. If you like, you could write some poetry, make some music. Look, you can still love your parents and live your life. I don't know how old are you, but whenever you feel very idependent and you know you have a job, rent a house maybe. If you want to date another girls, just do it lady. Just try to be as discreet as you can, have some fun, don't be afraid to be yourself. If you have friends, try to stick with them, have some fun as well. Look, out lives are already short unfortunatelly. We don't need to make it shorter than it is. Just try to be as honest as possible FIRST to yourself. Like i isaid, you like some one, just kiss her, ok? Be discreet and enjoy!! Don't live your life just based on the others opinions. I hope you are ok, i wish you the best! Sorry for something!
Hmm that's a really hard spot. I have many friends who are in the same situation as you. I'm a member too so I can help you from what I have seen my friends do. First off, no one should change their love for you at all. Your worth is the same no matter what and I'm sure your parents will see that. Second I understand the part about wanting to die. I have been there a few times and I know. Please don't do it. Im not really sure how to help but I really wish I could, even if it's just talking with you :)
This makes me feel like I need someone to open up to I don’t think there are any people who will love me the the same way that I love them, I feel far away despite treating people with love
7:30 this one is way too relatable to me, I'm not even jealous of my friend's friends but I feel more like our friendship is slowly disappearing and I see that I'm almost the only one trying to keep the group together and it doesn't work much.... I guess it's one of those moments in life when you better let it go or it will keep hurting you, trynna just think about the good memories you had together and find your own new friends (?) Now I have this one friend, he's korean and I'm brazilian but even with the distance and cultural differences I feel like he's more blood of my blood than anyone else I've met before. I've never seen someone like him, I admire him and I wish that he lives the happiest life this world ever witnessed.
SO. MANY. PEOPLE. have not been in a relationship and that's NORMAL. But I do know it's hard, you feel like an alien, and become jaded with the world because you feel like there's something wrong with you. But there's tons of people just like you who truly want to connect. Just go and do activities you love, surround yourself with things you're passionate about and that's the best way to find people you resonate with. If it's truly making you miserable consider going to therapy because sometimes we self-sabotage and look for people who are not available because we're afraid to be loved and love back (ironically). You do the inner work, find places where you feel comfortable, and happy you will find amazing people who want to be with you. Hang in there!!
I like this channel it’s like a mental health check type of vibe . It need to be encouraged more I wish people opened up more and let out their feelings and I know it’s hard since I’m the same way as well I have a really hard time expressing myself
Wow the first one was me but several years ago! You care about them enough to not want them to k*ll themselves but also mentally can’t take it. It has left a long lasting impression on me and was hard when I was in healthy relationships after that.
her channel seems both sad and cool at the same time cuz she gets to meet so many cool and interesting people but so many of them have a deep sadness and loneliness within them
Lately I’ve been experiencing depression for the first time and it doesn’t help that my connection with my friends has been getting worse and worse. I want to talk to someone about it but I have no one to talk to and I don’t think i’d be able to talk when the time comes.
I experienced depression for the first time some months ago. Same about the part with friends. Therapy really improved everything. Do have any chance of getting it?
@@arunaschraut2839 I feel you 100%, have you ever tried being pen pals with a stranger? I do know times have changed a lot and is difficult to trust people nowadays. A lot of evil goes around but also good decent people. Let me know if you're up to it. I'm a female, Dominican, lawyer, and 36, my display name is not my real name but if you reach out I'll gladly share my contact info with you :) Don't ever feel like you don't have people to talk to or confide in. Anyway, I do not know why your comment hit differen than those of others but it did. Take care of yourself. 🤍
Real therapy helps people develop tools to help themselves. A therapist, a counselor, or whatever mental health professional isn't supposed to hold all the answers. They're just meant to guide people along their own journey of healing, which is scary for some because they don't feel confident enough to make decisions or want someone to tell them what to do to fix whatever is wrong. Therapy is about helping people find the strength within to overcome their own demons. If you haven't been helped in that way, I hope you find a professional who DOES help you find your strength within. It's there; it just might be deeply buried beneath other things. 🤗
@@HouseMDaddict i dont want a professional. They are indoctrinated mouth pieces and drug pushers for big pharma. You have no idea what hell their drugs put me through. Never again.
@@MeRiaNevaMynd the problem that those drugs cannot fix your problems or change how your mind process reality and ideas ,, they may calm you down a little or make your mood a little bit better and you had to stay on them while trying to fix your mind to accept living
To the person who's thinking about their ex: it's okay to look back fondly on the nice things an abuser did. Those are YOUR memories, and you're allowed to enjoy them, even while acknowledging that they're a bad person who really hurt you. In my case, I'm now at a point where I can laugh and remember the good times with my abuser (a parent), all while knowing I will never let them back in my life again. It took years, but I can now see them as a complicated person who wasn't all bad or all good, and I can hold that complexity. But it definitely takes time to get there.
‘Healing doesn’t happen in a straight line’
My goodness I felt that so deeply!
@@alexpolon8822 Hey thanks! I had never head this song. It was pretty good.
I really loved the production though! Like a lot actually! Haha.
Life rarely happens in a straight line. We all walk a crooked mile.
Ameeeeeennnnn!!! Healing can take years. I wish I had heard that sooner. When I was suffering with things.
Same here. I was close to tears, that's for sure
“i miss myself, i don’t know where i am” … that hit differently
Yeeeees
People really don’t appreciate this channel enough. Her art,her craft. It’s exquisite. ✊🏿.
Yeah, it's a healing. What could be more valuable than that. Let's not forget about all these people that open their heart and share those painful raw things that resonate with us as viewers. Tells us "hey, you're not alone".. I especially appreciate those that dare share their uglyness/ things they're not proud of.. For me personally, it is MUCH harder to be faced, let alone talk about my ugly side, then it is to talk about the uglyness that was done to me..
Thoraya has created a healing platform where we can all feel human and recognize we're not alone. It's MAJOR.
I know...it's soothing, and Thoraya's making this world a better place, one person at a time.
Beautifully expressed, and so true.
2M ain't enough?
Actually we really do
from a person suffering with depression, this video helped me
Her videos always help me. I’ve struggled with depression for along time.
Does it help to feel like u are not the only one who suffers in this world .... Thats cruel
@@vlinder0108 this is not related to the topic but your music taste is *chefs kiss*
UK: hope you're having an easier time now
her videos increase depression but i like them 😔
It is so incredibly sad that literally every one is sad. Sad.
but like some people REALLY have great relationships w their family siblings and have real friends and idk but i always wish they had a kinda sad thing in their life ik it's a really bad thing to wish for this is probably because they literally look like they're having the best times of their life i wanna be there someday
@@august-bl1jh I understand but trust me every one has some thing or the other shit, no one has it all. It's just hard man, Idk you reap what you sow please be careful of what you wish for others.
@@jasminekaushal400 yeah true but idk it's a thought that crosses my mind when i'm not in the best of moods thank you tho :)
I am happy
That’s existing for ya
"Healing from trauma is not linear ", might be the most perfect insightful reminder I've ever known to touch my path from utube especially! Thank u Thoraya thank u so much sister! 💓
Exactly when she said that I read your comment!!!
“It’s a very human feeling” that’s such a nice solid validating comment
The person staying bc they are afraid the gf will kill themselves is being manipulated.
True.. Bcus ive went thru the same shit with ex bf. But i left him for my mental well-being (otherwise i wudve killed myself first) and he's still alive.😌🙂
@@poojjeii You chose you. That's empowering. Good for you. That takes strength.
Unfortunately it's not always just a manipulation tactic. When I was in highschool and broke up with my boyfriend he overdosed and although he survived he went from being an honors student to being mentally retarded for the rest of his life and that burden is alot to live with. When I visited him in the hospital he was so messed up that he tried to read the card I got him upside down. It was heartbreaking.
@@Alessastarz fuckkkk! 😳 that's sucks. I stayed with the guy who said he would kill himself if I left after only about 4 mnts together in 10th grade. 9 1/2 years and every punch, slap, push, cheating, sexual assault, verbal abuse, locked in room, gun pointed at me, and so much more. I wish I would've left when I wanted to at 4 mnts. I never told anyone. Not my family bc I was scared my dad would kill him. I didn't even tell my best friend not even now 12 yrs after. Please remember that you don't control what others think or do. It was his choice to do that not yours. At such a young age we tend to try and protect one another from getting into trouble by parents or authorities so we don't say anything I hopes nothing goes wrong. If you have kids please always let them know that they can come to you about anything even if they think it will cause trouble. So how you react to them when they themselves do something will pave the road of if they fill safe in telling you in some cases maybe. I never told my parents bc I didn't want them to be disappointed in me for some reason for not coming to them when it first happened. Also I didn't want them to carry that pain of knowing their little girl was going thru something like that or guilt for not knowing. I was good at hiding everything. I'm with a good man now who shows me everyday what love is suppose to feel like from a man. He is my best friend. Now you know my secret. Thanks for sharing your story. 🤗 hugs and love from me!!!
@@Alessastarz His suicide attempt was actually the ultimate in manipulation. As long as you feel guilt in regards to him he is still manipulating you. His current state is on him not you
I really loveeeee this project, allowing people telling things they are not comfortable or are scared saying out loud, gives them, I think, some sort of relief!!
Keep this amazing work up, Thoraya❤️
If anyone is staying in a relationship (or friendship) with someone who threatens or implies they would kill themselves or "not be alive without you/this relationship" you need to leave that relationship/friendship. It will NOT be your fault if they do something to themselves, and a lot of the time they're using it to manipulate you. It is not fair of them to put their issues and things they refuse to manage on their own, onto you. That THEIR stuff to handle, not yours.
Question, do we have to just left or like talk to them first and then leave? I have been told this advice very often but im really scared to actually leave them because i actually care about them :(
@@mixzoe6228 well, have you talked to them already about this? Do they listen and try to get help or do they solely depend on you for everything? Often people try to downplay the significance of things, but it becomes very obvious and very clear they do not want anyone but you to help them and they're either staying the same or getting worse and it becomes more taxing on you. You keep trying harder and become more exhausted because you think YOU'RE not doing enough to help them and that's why they're not changing or that's why they're getting worse. If it's getting to that point, if your needs (not wants literally your needs) are not being met but they're making sure theirs are, that's a problem. No talking about it is going to change things. You can care a lot about them, but if they're not reciprocating or respecting you, and are instead gaslighting you or manipulating you into dropping your own life and needs to take care of just them, that's unhealthy.
Unfortunately it's not always just a manipulation tactic. When I was in highschool and broke up with my boyfriend he overdosed and although he survived he went from being an honors student to being mentally retarded for the rest of his life and that burden is alot to live with. When I visited him in the hospital he was so messed up that he tried to read the card I got him upside down. It was heartbreaking.
@@Alessastarz yeah that’s tough but it’s not your fault. You wanted to leave and that’s enough of a reason to leave. He could have 100% gotten help from someone else, his decisions are his, not yours.
@@ana8182 thankyou for your kind words. I tend to self blame in these circumstances but I also kept the boundary and didnt get back together with him bc I knew it would only further complicate things.
Oh wow at 6:57, I completely relate. I have two best friends, and they are the closest friends that I've ever had. They aren't friends with each other, but both of them are friends with other people. Like lots of other people. And I only have them. So I feel guilty about wanting so much of their time at school (only one of them goes to my school) or just in general, but I miss them so much when they are with their other friends for a long time because to me it feels like forever but to them it's nothing because their having fun with others. And I would make other friends but I feel like I don't know how anymore. I just feel like I don't have enough energy to even try making friends anymore, which sounds dumb but it's the best way I can describe it. (And to top it off, my best friend that does go to my school might move an hour and a half away soon. I hope she doesn't, and I'm trying to help her find houses close by but she thinks they will most likely move farther away).
i used to be just like you and surprisingly it didn't end like i thought it would. i thought our friendship was over at some point because i cared too much. once i let them go and started to put myself first our relationship got stronger. i still don't know why maybe my expectations changed and im happy with what i have now.
Wow its exactly the same things as me and it helped me to know that someone gotten the same problem as me so thank you really
I love to hear people talking and sharing and loving logically because sometimes I can’t think logically
The guy at 3:10 sounds like he held back his tear
When he said
"I HAD a friend" I tear up, cuz man i kinda can relate with that
As a young 30 year old I can say with certainty, the younger generations are smarter, more intune with themselves than my generation and those before them. Realise the Greatness within YOU.
Continue to Love Yourselves, acknowledge your higherself and know you are more powerful then you can imagine. Life gets easier as you mature.
No one is alone. Including YOU ❤️
We are all loved firstly by ourselves and by many people along the journey of life. 🤗
9:36 I love the guy in the back whos clearly lost and then you see him walking into the building behind them
If you don't have friends, no one can hurt you, and you can't hurt them. I try to make friends, but it never works. I do live my life in kindness, and that helps a lot. It becomes easier over the years. I'm in my 50s now.
It hurts me to be alone. I have a hard time making friends but I have a few.
@@Catlily5 I should have mentioned my daughters. I have two wonderful daughters, 20 and 23.
@@tammystratford7079 I am glad you have them!
These are great as always and a reminder that you're not alone but I would love to see you asking these questions to people in their 30-40s or even 50s and what are their thoughts and feeling about life. Are they happy in their jobs? Are they where they told themselves they would be when they were younger like these people in colleges? Are they happy in their marriage life? Are they married to the person they once wished for? What would you tell younger people to do since they've crossed that phase? Idk just people a little older and their view. Great work Thoraya!
Yes!!I love how these videos give such a sense of solidarity!!🥰
BUT as someone who's not in her 20s anymore,I couldn't agree any more with you on how great it'd be to hear perspectives and issues from people from older age groups too.
Cos while yeah majority of viewers may be students,would still be great to know that even as slightly older people,we're not alone.Cos when I relate to some of these issues,it's awful to have"You're too old to still be struggling with that wtf?"mentality after viewing😥😖
@@mikajulius8148 Yes, you are never too old or young to have issues, mentally or any other forms of issues has no age, it can happen to anyone and everyone has their own pace and needs time to heal from me. it's just part of life. Hopefully Thoraya sees this and makes one, that'd be awesome.
@@sweetwarmblanket 100% true about how age doesn't place"boundaries"on issues of any kind.Yeah & tbh I feel like Thoraya's playform in general actually helps quite greatly with the healing process for people featured as well as viewers.So I'm crossing my fingers tightly that she does see it so that healing for older folks' can take place more easily too🤞🏽🌟
"Are they married to the person they once wished for?" this is an amazin question
She just puts up the sign and people choose to stop or not. My guess is older ppl are busy or with their kids,etc. and may not be able to stop.
Making my Saturday more optimistic and to not stress over things in life that I can't control.
I hope every day brings you optimism and peace ❤️
“It eventually works out and I know it’s gonna work out for me too.”
It made me think: She’s strong.
Very relatable and thank you for sharing.
I really love, "Read a secret, leave a secret", it HAS TO b cathartic, especially to college students away from home & close friends, to get their true feelings out even if it's thru writing!!! Writing itself can be liberating and you could release a lot of angst built up inside. Remember, EVERYONE, u r as important as the person next to u, there's a reason u r here, and u will find it one day!!! I promise, there ARE BETTER DAYS AHEAD!!! Treat, care, and respect people, the way u would like to b...and the you and the world will start healing!!!
Love that, “ healing from trauma isn’t linear.”
This kind of content should be everywhere. We have different stories to tell and I hope we all heal from those secrets we don't talk about.
When you feel like your existence or life is pointless, remember this:
“Do you really have to be special? Do you really need people's recognition? I don't think so. When it comes to my child... He doesn't need to become great. Why would he have to be better than anyone else? After all, just look at him... He's so cute. He's already great. Because he was... born into this world.” ~ Carla Jaeger
The fact that knew exactly where this is from before I finished reading.
This is a horrible quote. If you aren't special or great, or trying to be either of those things then there really is no point to life. I think one of the reasons so many people struggle with existential questions/depression is because society pretty much conditions you to do nothing of note with your life so most people just drift on through the years and end up becoming empty soulless husks, who in turn make society worse.
@@Weird_dude265 i mean if everyone is special then no one is, right? the point of living life is to enjoy it- special or not special. you don't have to do anything grand when you don't want to. im not saying that you should just do nothing either. just don't feel pressured to please others or to meet what other people's expectations of what special is. and like the quote said, you're already great. just being here right now is enough
@@hymph7357 The point of living life is not to enjoy it. If it was then you would either get high and have orgies all day, be a hermit, or try to be the best in the world at the things you're passionate about, and I'm assuming you don't do those things. Hitler was here, the same way the bum down the street is there. Were they great? No. One was a racist and the other gave up on life. Being here right now is not enough. Do something with your life. Everything I said in my previous comment still stands.
I don’t believe the statement “you can’t love others if you don’t first love yourself.”
I think it’s true to some extent as to be able to truly love others, you have to be at peace with yourself so that the love you are giving is pure and doesn’t have any dependant or insincere connotations, whether it’s conscious or unconscious.
i love love love when someone mentions how healing isn't linear. it's such an honest misconception, but you never understand until you're there. healing is just life; it's a rollercoaster.
This is an amazing way for people to see that problems are faced by everyone. The best way to get through it is together and with love and compassion!❤️🧡💛💚💙💜
These videos make me feel so human
And happy to be human.
Sometimes I think we get lost in the pain of the world and forget to enjoy the fact that we’re living.
Thank you, Thoraya.
“I tell people I got in a knife fight with a crazy bitch but the crazy bitch was me”… wow. 😔
That makes mine not so bad
Here's a little list containing some important triggers or hard subjects that are discussed in this video :
0:09 - /
0:47 - /
1:20 - Abuse, (Incest ?)
2:13 - /
3:10 - /
4:01 - Abortion
4:31 - /
5:12 - /
5:15 - /
5:20 - /
5:26 - Emotionally abusive teacher
5:35 - Suicide attempt
5:49 - /
5:59 - /
6:01 - /
6:23 - /
6:28 - /
6:57 - /
7:45 - /
8:17 - /
9:00 - /
9:55 - Sexual trauma
I just hope this list might help the ones who need it ♥
Thank u sm for doing this
I don’t think 1:20 is necessarily incest, that’s an assumption. Never said he sexually abused her
This comment is honestly the best
I wish it was pinned
Thank you for that, it is awesome
these videos give me so much comfort, I don't even really know why. maybe because it shows that a lot of people struggle with the same issues, even tho they don't show it.
These responses were brilliant!! The balance of love, pain, vulnerability and empathy each person showed here is beautiful and I appreciate each person sharing with respect
This video made me tear up. I'm so proud of the people that wrote all these. You are gonna get through this!
Gosh, all these young people are sooo kind and wise! You are all just wonderful, how you can relate and try to comfort each other. I feel that in the end, we are all in this together..
One of these secrets was actually exactly the same as my secret. It really hit me hard. I really hope the person who wrote it can get to where I've gotten to because they will feel alot better when they do ❤ healing takes time.
9:56 made me think about how healing from trauma never really stops. It comes in waves. then the person mentioned the same concept after reading the secret. I'm glad I'm not the only one who deals with this issue, it can make you feel kind of guilty for backtracking on progress.
We need an online version of this, ive always wanted to be in one 👍🏻
@@wwehht i attempted suicide 5 times and no one knows because I failed miserably and just woke up on the floor 😃
@@wwehht It’s alright, I know that feeling very well. Tho I’m not near that age, i had extreme anxiety to the point I had a panic attack because I was too scared to answer the door. I’m not quite sure how I got past it so I can’t offer too much advice, but having someone there to help push you can help. You’ll freak out at the time but I’m sure you won’t regret it. It’s like exposer therapy, subconsciously put yourself in a situation where you have to talk, y’know?
@@LordOfElysium ooooh how are you now?🥺
@@sheilasanchezherrera3064 not much different to be honest, I’m still majorly depressed but I seem to be a lot more aware of my surroundings. Everything used to just feel like a foggy dream that I’d walk through. It’s so weird and I feel bad saying this…but I miss it. If I have to feel this way, I at least want my reality to be blurred-
@@LordOfElysium I’m so sorry you had to go through that. Wishing you all the best through your healing process ❤️❤️
I just today found this channel but I love it.
I recently went to a seminar about aggression and harmony, as I have trouble standing up for what I want. One of the most important messages I brought home from there was that, just because you couldn’t do something or slipped a bit into old patterns, that doesn’t mean you can’t do it and never will, it just means that you will get there, just not yet. Sometimes taking a look back instead of ahead and reminding yourself how far You have come instead of how far you have to go is all you need.
I find this very healing, it's feels good seeing people listen to the secrets and empathising and supporting people
Thoraya, these videos keep me going. It gives me some things to relate too. Thank you ♡
You and many other strangers keep me going. Thank you as well ❤️
@@Thorayaa Aww, I didn't expect you to reply. You've made my day ❤
Excellent way to make people realize that they are not the only suffering in this world!
I feel for these people, I hope that writing the secret brings some sort of relief and I hope that they see these responses 🙏🧡
I honestly appreciate this channel and the work you do.. specially for those who are on this... I guess it helps them to get their feelings out there... But I would never ever be able to do this for long.. all the pain and heartbreak will destroy me .
Thoraya- I hope you never stop making these videos. I love them all. So real. I love hearing about other people's lives.
I love the kindness of the responses to each secret, you really know how to bring the best out in people, Thoraya. ❤️
I don’t know why…scratch that I know why…but when strangers tell me they love me or stuff like that it doesn’t do anything for me. It’s super nice and sweet and i love that people are kind enough to try but, you don’t know me. Your supposed “love” for me, is empty.
No one wants nor deserves empty love.
Thank you Thoraya for gifting a platform to the youth and to anyone who needs freedom of expression. ❤️💜👍🏽
Those people are sooo rich in their words. I'm proud I'm living on one planet with them.
Leave a secret to be included in this series at this link: www.thoraya.com/pages/leave-a-secret
Come out to the University of Tennessee in Knoxville!
Thank you so so much Thoraya, I didn't realise how liberating that would be till I did it. Thank you! 😩💖
Thank you for doing this. I sent in something I haven't had the strength to say out loud yet and it feels nice to know that my pain will be seen.
Thanks, I had no idea how it would feel.
Love you're videos. Makes me realize that we all so similar but yet so fare apart . We all need someone to not judge us. Thank you for being you
THIS!! ✨I'm in love with this video and the kind spirits that spoke up here ✨ Thank you for this! Thank you so much!
I have two secrets that I can't share:
1) my really good friend is being mentally abused at home and I'm one of the only people that she feels safe enough to talk to, It used to be physical and I'm really worried that her or her younger brother will get physically hurt again and I can't help it
2) I came out 4 years ago as non-binary and my grandma keeps on sending me messages saying that "a grandmother and granddaughters love is forever" and I can't help but feel guilty about being non-binary, it feels bad to say but she makes me feel inhuman, but at the same time I feel bad that we can't have that love because of who I am.
10:41 "Healing from trauma isn't linear". Thank you so much, I shall try and remember that.
It's incredible to see how much sympathy and empathy these people can have for people they don't know not something you get to see a lot.
Your channel and your videos are just such a special part of UA-cam
I try really hard to convince myself my life is worth something simply bc I’m here. There’s not a degree, amount of money, title or any box I need to check. I’m here, figuring things out the best I can, loving the people who love me, and that’s good enough. I hope that will help someone else too.
I really hope you come to Sacramento or I run into you some where because this would relieve so much. I love you’re videos. I felt so alone for so long but hearing so many relatable things comforts those thoughts. Please don’t ever stop doing these.
This project is so amazing... maybe it helps some of these people to just write it down.
Sometimes I just need to share a problem with somebody to deal better with it, talking helps guys ❤️
Absolutely love this. All the way from South Africa 🇿🇦
I just love you . Your content makes my day .
I love you back! ❤️
When I see the notification that Thoraya uploaded a video that makes my day
Lots of love from Somalia 🇸🇴❤
Thank youuuu! Sending you lots of love as well ❤️
I love the raw emotions coming from the speakers. I appreciate it so much.
Makes me feel like the raw emotions I show are valid and shared
It makes me wish I could've been there to tell mine, but I feel I'd probably be too embarrassed
In my experience
the best you can do when you
don't feel loved & validated by other people
is to always be your best so that
you can love and validate yourself
while striving to be becoming better!
Wow
I wish I could tell mine there, but I'd probably be too embarrassed
The first one really got to me. Im afraid to leave my boyfriend too because he might commit suicide. Im only 21 he's 22 and we've together for 3 yrs and im already tired, I feel stuck, im just unhappy. He's tried killing himself 2 times now but did not succeed. I'm what's keeping him alive which is why I cant leave him even though I want out of the relationship. I really don't know what to do, I want to choose me and my happiness but wont be able to live with myself if he hurt himself because of me. Sometimes I wish I could just disappear and never return.
He would be hurting himself because of him not you. Your never at fault for the choices someone else chooses to make. Your boyfriend sounds like he needs serious help he isn’t getting and that sucks. But it’s not on you to give that help to him. Especially at your age.
thats a very heavy situation to be stuck in. i strongly recommend speaking with a mentor or person of trust about it. then it'll also feel less like it only weighs on your shoulders
Each person is responsible for his or her own health and well-being. It is not your job to stay with him for the rest of your natural life to keep him from killing himself. That’s all on him. You should be contacting his family and friends to let them know what he has said and done if they don’t already know about it. Maybe a trusted parent or friend can talk him into pursuing psychiatric treatment or calling a suicide hotline. I know you said he attempted suicide twice already, but I just can’t help thinking that a certain percentage of his actions are just emotionally manipulative BS to keep you from going anywhere. Anyway, his mental health is not your job. Frankly, his threats of violence, even just toward himself if not others, feels like “the biggest red flag in the red flag factory.” He is emotionally abusing you. So put the choice to live or die where it belongs - on your partner. As for you, please consider getting counseling or even just calling a domestic violence hotline. What he’s doing to you is a form of domestic abuse. If you choose to leave him, block him from your life completely, disappear and make sure he doesn’t know where you went. Keep in the back your mind that you might want to get a restraining order against him should you leave.
how he attempts 2 times ?
You need to do what is best for you. He sounds tortured, and by staying with him you’ll only being torturing yourself. He needs help, and you need to love yourself first. Staying with someone out of fear is not okay. & if he threatens to harm himself if you leave, that is emotional abuse. It’s best to get out while you can.
7th grader here.
6:57
I relate to that shit so much. It's insane how you could repress a human emotion like jealousy and just call it a day.
I always end up thinking "They have other friends, and so do I.", or "They can be independant, so I can, too."
However, I realize that it isn't normal to just stop thinking about it. I like getting things off my chest. It's just a natural thing for me to be able to just talk about something that's troubling me with SOMEbody, but I know it isn't that way for everyone. Whenever I do ask about something that's troubling me (like jealousy, or emotional hurt) with my friends, it feels like a weight has been lifted off of my chest.
what arises in me
as I watch this video,
is just how much emotional pain, I'm in.
I'm dying inside.
I'm lonely.
I am forever: perpetually alone.
never the desired one,
never the chosen one,
never the wanted one.
I'm in hell.
suicidal hell.
despair rapes my soul.
I have nothing to live for.
I am raped by the past,
and I am terrified of the future.
I cannot bear this hell anymore.
I am suffocated and drowning:
in despair and grief and guilt and regret and rage...
I am going to share my secret here because I feel like I have nobody to talk to.
My entire family (extended included) is Mormon but I am a lesbian. I am really afraid to come out to them because I worry that nobody would be accepting, but I really love them and I would actually miss them if I had to run away. I haven’t been diagnosed but I think I’m depressed. It was worse last year and hardly a day would pass before I though about killing myself. I think the only reason I didn’t was because I promised my mom I would never kill myself. I am afraid that it will get worse here again. And everyday I am scared that my dad will find out I like girls and try to change me or something. Once he talked to me about “agendas” and how he doesn’t want me to be manipulated into doing something I don’t want to do (I think he meant being gay) and I really tried not to start crying right in front of him. And again, I truly do love him so I would be devastated if when he finds out, he disowns me or something. And I know for a fact my mom doesn’t think he loves her anymore. I think my whole family needs therapy but there is such a stigma around it, I’m afraid to even bring it up. All the time I tell myself that it would just be easier to kill myself and then I won’t have to worry about anything and I don’t even know what’s keeping me here anymore.
(Im sorry this is so long)
I’m so sorry that you are feeling so alone. I hope it helped that you were able to speak this into the world and know that people are here and listening. In my experience the first step to dealing with my own sexuality was accepting it for myself. I don’t have experience being brought up in a religious environment but I remember being terrified of people realising I was gay. What helped me the most was to have a friend that I could be myself with. I looked for someone who was open minded and I told them when I was around 16 years old. Telling this person and them accepting me changed my life. For the first time I allowed that secret part of myself just to be, just to exist and not in my head. The heavy cold feeling i carried around with me felt lighter and for those moments I was with that person I was able to not feel dirty, strange or wrong. It was exhilarating. I then told another person, and another. Slowly I built up a group that knew who I really was, and I realised they loved me as a person and not as a straight person. I was able to get my feelings out, and I spent less and less time trying to hide or trying to pretend. It made me stronger and stronger. Then it went around school, and I was so terrified I tried to run away. I packed a bag stole money from my mom and ran away on a train. This is how my family found out. I was humiliated for a while and they didn’t understand why I reacted that way. But I’ll never forget the feeling. It was sheer terror. I was afraid of the rejection from my family I was afraid a stopper had been removed that I couldn’t put back in. I spoke to my grandad when I first got home and he said to me and I’ll never forget it: “it doesn’t matter what you do, you should never be ashamed of who you are”. I know you may never hear these words from your family so I wanted to share these words with you because I’ve never forgotten that moment. This is who you are, and you can’t change it. But you can change who you allow to love you, and as you grow as a person and the real you starts to come alive, you will draw in new people around you who will love that real you that you are holding inside afraid. And that type of love beats everything you’ve known before, because it makes you feel powerful and brave, and makes your life complete again.
I’m so sorry that you’re going through this, but know that I read this, I thought about you and I sent you my strength and my words and extended my hands of friendship. All the best x
@@Asherz1 I do not know how to tell you how much this means to me. Not only what you said, but the fact that you would take the time to help me even though you have no idea who I am. Thank you so much
I feel you. I’m omnisexual and am terrified to tell my parents. I know that they think it’s a sin. Everyday it gets harder to keep this secret. I think eventually the pain of telling will be less than the pain of being silent.
I hope both of us find a happy ending ♥️🏳️🌈
I don’t know you and you don’t know me I am your sister and you are mine
You are loved and to lose such a beautiful young mind would be a devastation
Look, don't worry too much. I know it's easier for me to tell you that cause i'm not you and i'm here writting this on my computer.
If you have a secret, it's ok to keep to yourself. You are not a criminal. You're just a person which is worried about yourself and your family. About the depression, maybe if you live always worried about your sexuality, it will create even more anxiety, fear and nightmares that doesn't exists.
First you need to take care of yourself. You're not a burden to anyone!! I say that because i have anxiety, i get depressive and such. We start to imagine situations which might never happen, but it creates inside of us a feeling of despair, lack of air, too much worries and so on. All this pressure needs to go somewhere else. If you feel very sad, very depressive, try to write it all down, doesn't matter what. Try to create an account on Blogger.com. There you can make your private diary. Don't ever think, just write it down. If you like, you could write some poetry, make some music.
Look, you can still love your parents and live your life. I don't know how old are you, but whenever you feel very idependent and you know you have a job, rent a house maybe. If you want to date another girls, just do it lady. Just try to be as discreet as you can, have some fun, don't be afraid to be yourself. If you have friends, try to stick with them, have some fun as well.
Look, out lives are already short unfortunatelly. We don't need to make it shorter than it is. Just try to be as honest as possible FIRST to yourself. Like i isaid, you like some one, just kiss her, ok? Be discreet and enjoy!! Don't live your life just based on the others opinions. I hope you are ok, i wish you the best! Sorry for something!
Hmm that's a really hard spot. I have many friends who are in the same situation as you. I'm a member too so I can help you from what I have seen my friends do. First off, no one should change their love for you at all. Your worth is the same no matter what and I'm sure your parents will see that. Second I understand the part about wanting to die. I have been there a few times and I know. Please don't do it. Im not really sure how to help but I really wish I could, even if it's just talking with you :)
The person who read the one about someone coming out is the one I want to have around me in life. They seem so kind and caring
This makes me feel like I need someone to open up to
I don’t think there are any people who will love me the the same way that I love them, I feel far away despite treating people with love
Just love yourself..
9:40 I can't stop laughing at the guy in the back just completely teleported😭
Your life has value. You matter. You matter. You matter.
Amen
I love how the person who reads the secret relates to it.
Me too. I think that takes courage to admit.
7:30 this one is way too relatable to me, I'm not even jealous of my friend's friends but I feel more like our friendship is slowly disappearing and I see that I'm almost the only one trying to keep the group together and it doesn't work much.... I guess it's one of those moments in life when you better let it go or it will keep hurting you, trynna just think about the good memories you had together and find your own new friends (?)
Now I have this one friend, he's korean and I'm brazilian but even with the distance and cultural differences I feel like he's more blood of my blood than anyone else I've met before. I've never seen someone like him, I admire him and I wish that he lives the happiest life this world ever witnessed.
Hearing Thoraya say she loves me is one of my favorite things 🥺
Those were some heart touching secrets.
Love, peace and joy to everyone reading my comment❤️
9:50 everything he said, I'm taking into my heart cuz I felt the same as that secret.
Knowing that people also are in your situation really helps
This is my new guilty pleasure, thank you Thoraya
Everyone has so much sympathy for others but little for themselves
Oh yes, I wish I could tell mine there sometime but I'd probably be too embarrassed
Learn to become the people
that You need
So that when those people
are no longer present,
You can lift someone else up!😌
SO. MANY. PEOPLE. have not been in a relationship and that's NORMAL. But I do know it's hard, you feel like an alien, and become jaded with the world because you feel like there's something wrong with you. But there's tons of people just like you who truly want to connect. Just go and do activities you love, surround yourself with things you're passionate about and that's the best way to find people you resonate with. If it's truly making you miserable consider going to therapy because sometimes we self-sabotage and look for people who are not available because we're afraid to be loved and love back (ironically). You do the inner work, find places where you feel comfortable, and happy you will find amazing people who want to be with you. Hang in there!!
I understand that person. I tell others to love themselves but I don’t love myself
I like this channel it’s like a mental health check type of vibe . It need to be encouraged more I wish people opened up more and let out their feelings and I know it’s hard since I’m the same way as well I have a really hard time expressing myself
*Keep bringing these episodes*
Wow the first one was me but several years ago! You care about them enough to not want them to k*ll themselves but also mentally can’t take it. It has left a long lasting impression on me and was hard when I was in healthy relationships after that.
her channel seems both sad and cool at the same time cuz she gets to meet so many cool and interesting people but so many of them have a deep sadness and loneliness within them
"I can relate to this" is said at a curious frequency 🤔
We need to talk to strangers more now than ever. We are all so intimately human.
Lately I’ve been experiencing depression for the first time and it doesn’t help that my connection with my friends has been getting worse and worse. I want to talk to someone about it but I have no one to talk to and I don’t think i’d be able to talk when the time comes.
I experienced depression for the first time some months ago. Same about the part with friends. Therapy really improved everything. Do have any chance of getting it?
@@arunaschraut2839 I feel you 100%, have you ever tried being pen pals with a stranger? I do know times have changed a lot and is difficult to trust people nowadays. A lot of evil goes around but also good decent people. Let me know if you're up to it. I'm a female, Dominican, lawyer, and 36, my display name is not my real name but if you reach out I'll gladly share my contact info with you :)
Don't ever feel like you don't have people to talk to or confide in. Anyway, I do not know why your comment hit differen than those of others but it did. Take care of yourself. 🤍
Sorry my comment was actually meant for you.
These are more helpful than all the years of "therapy" in the medical system. These are real
Real therapy helps people develop tools to help themselves. A therapist, a counselor, or whatever mental health professional isn't supposed to hold all the answers. They're just meant to guide people along their own journey of healing, which is scary for some because they don't feel confident enough to make decisions or want someone to tell them what to do to fix whatever is wrong. Therapy is about helping people find the strength within to overcome their own demons. If you haven't been helped in that way, I hope you find a professional who DOES help you find your strength within. It's there; it just might be deeply buried beneath other things. 🤗
@@HouseMDaddict i dont want a professional. They are indoctrinated mouth pieces and drug pushers for big pharma. You have no idea what hell their drugs put me through. Never again.
@@MeRiaNevaMynd what did they prescribe you?
@@MeRiaNevaMynd
the problem that those drugs cannot fix your problems or change how your mind process reality and ideas ,, they may calm you down a little or make your mood a little bit better and you had to stay on them while trying to fix your mind to accept living
@@MeRiaNevaMynd Counselors cannot prescribe medication in the USA. They can recommend someone else to prescribe but they can't do it themselves.
Thank you for every one of your videos. I love you as one human to another and everyone in the videos who participate. Thank you 🙏 ❤️
Awe, the person who wrote “ I wish people loved me like I love them” made me cry. 😭 I felt that.
Such humanity, so much love. Great videos, your content is very uplifting!
This is hands down my favorite series on your channel! Obsessed with it 😍
If I were to be there I have endless things to write…. Which makes me a bit sad.
Yessss, healing is NOT linear, nothing is, but yh that's definitely something I can relate to and something I forget, too
This needs more episode. It feels easier to let go of secrets if you can stay anonymously after releasing it to others.
To the person who's thinking about their ex: it's okay to look back fondly on the nice things an abuser did. Those are YOUR memories, and you're allowed to enjoy them, even while acknowledging that they're a bad person who really hurt you.
In my case, I'm now at a point where I can laugh and remember the good times with my abuser (a parent), all while knowing I will never let them back in my life again. It took years, but I can now see them as a complicated person who wasn't all bad or all good, and I can hold that complexity. But it definitely takes time to get there.
Thank you for this project and your channel in general
Again, so powerful. Helps me with perspective. Thank you!
Amazing you are doing this. May God continue to heal others through your channel, love and humanity ❤
The last female keep it real and it made sooo much sense💯