The worst thing about the movie: His ex-wife has a new partner who is nice to the kids, nice to her, helps fly a plane which saves all of their lives later, has glasses. The main character is a failed author, a failed husband and a failed father, yet he gets himself back into contention by doing ABSOLUTELY FUCK ALL!!! Then the stupid mysogenistic portrayal of the weak and feable woman's new partner is killed horribly, and NO ONE GIVES A SHIT. What a fucking suprise!
Classic Roland Emmerich script. Awfully drawn characters. He seems to have contempt for his audience. The bloke has basic knowledge of flying a plane so we're meant to hate him?
Kermode is right to be skeptical. The Italian PM would have been first in the queue for a berth on one of the ships. And he would have brought half a dozen leggy girls for an on-board Bunga Bunga party.
haha i love the good doctor's platitudinous, patronising carl sagen-esque 'message voice', sums up the tone of these latter day effects movies brilliantly
Kim Newman (Empire) and Peter Bradshaw (The Guardian) both said that 2012 is somewhere between unwatchable and unmissable. Absolutely right, because its so fundamentally terrible, there is certainly a level of enjoyment towards the film. "It's Russian, eh?"
Worse... he was Ukrainian that then became Russian over the course of the movie. They clearly did not care as long as there was an accent of some sort.
He's right through that the 1970s disaster movie had some amazing stunts and sets, not a video game style graphics of a car driving through a glass building as it collapses.....
My only experience of this film was walking in on my older brother watching it, there was some stunt scene involving cars falling out of a plane "Wait for the manufacturer close-up" BOOOM Chrysler
I was working in a shop renting out DVDs when this movie was released on DVD. Oh all the hours spent watching this movie in the shop because we would screen new DVD releases... many many of my brain cells were sacrificed
I just got home from seeing it. I thought it was hilarious. All the action scenes are incredibly far over the top and beyond any semblance of reality, all the dialogue and characters are incredibly cheesy and dumb, and huge portions of the plot are nonsensical and idiotic. It really makes it feel that it is actually some kind of lampoon of big budget movies more than a genuine attempt at a real movie.
When CGI becomes just a crutch for lame films with no storyline, that's when I really get disillusioned with it, don't get me wrong, I was bowled over when CGI came out in films like Jurassic Park and IMHO it can still work wonders in films like LOTR, Pan's Labyrinth and some Pixar films, but for me Hollywood is relying on it to carry mediocre films far too much.
@maximuslaurius I disagree, Independence Day was a great blockbuster popcorn movie, it really was, it was the first of its kind to bring the destruction to Earth on such a level. Will Smith gave a charismatic, funny performance, the film never took itself too seriously, the plot was simple and uncomplicated and actually made sense, there was no bizarre backstory or long explanation bits. It was spectacular, well directed and really good fun, it did EXACTLY what a good disaster movie should!
I think you've more or less hit the nail on the head with your last sentence. It all boils down to "suspension of disbelief". Your right in saying that an obvious stunt is just as irritating as obvious CGI, but this is because anything that suddenly brings your mind out of the film and back into the reality that you're watching a movie amounts to bad story-telling on the directors part. This is why I hate bad (obvious) CGI, because it will look so out of place that it bursts the bubble...
The worst thing about the film for me was that everyone I knew suddenly kept talking about the stupid Mayan Prophecy, thinking that the world would end in three years time. And there was me just sitting there rolling my eyes and thinking, making a very underwhelming film is bad enough, but getting everyone worked up into believing the balderdash that conceived it is just Vomit-inducing.
Hey MrHokeykokey I couldn't agree with you more. I recently got the French Connection on DVD andwatched it for the first time in probably 15 years and the car chase was totally breathtaking and left me feling quite shattered (I am a professional driver so it has a more pointed effect,perhaps) On the other hand I recently watched Knowing and apart froma brief sharp intake of breath as the plane dropped out of the sky I found myself thinking"Nice CGI" not "Wow - how the hell did they DO THAT!!"
@Ryanmiller70 I respect your opinion as well, but apart from the visuals the film lacked everything. As I have started to devlop an intrest in film, I've become more critical of them.
can roland emmerich make a movie apart from stargate that is not about disasters??? independance day, the day after tommorrow, 2012, even dean devlin made the abysmal geostorm, how many times can you recycle the same idea?
He did Anonymous, an ungodly boring and stupid movie about the weird theory that Shakespeare didn't write his plays. Instead they were written by some guy who was Elizabeth I's lover or something. I managed to get through about half of it before I couldn't take anymore of the absolute stupidity of this story.
I liked the Russian oligarch. And I really liked the cynical US politician played by Oliver Platt. It was a pity that the failed-author-and-failed-everything-else character survived. What I noticed most was the sheer paranoia and conspiracy-mongering in the film: if the same old loonies survive, what is the point of beginning again ?
Hi padster123, you make alot of good points re people's expectations of movies (annie hall, etc), but I thought I should point out that I personally wasn't belittling CGI as an art. I agree it takes alot of skill to create the effects in blockbuster movies, and I do enjoy the visual effects, but the point i was making was that you just don't get that same instant gut reaction, that heart-in-mouth feeling, from a CGI stunt that you do from a "real" stunt...
the effect were even ruined because of characters making one liners when skypscrapers were about to fall on them and Cusack suddenly turning into a stunt driver... it was contrived crappy nonesense. 2001: A Space Oddysey has miles better effects and is actually a great film in itself.
Hi MartinandFreddie, yeah thats exactly what I was trying to describe: That physical, gut-reaction is what always seems to be missing whenever I see an obvious CGI scene in a movie.
...(cont) e.g. If I see a CGI car chase I will be enjoying the scene and appreciating the visual spectacle but no matter how inventive or over the top it is it won't make me react physically, whereas if you watch the car chase scene in French Connection for example, not only are you enjoying the scene but your pulse starts racing and your body tenses because you know that the risky driving that you're watching did actualy happen in reality to a certain extent, do you see what I mean?
I agree, though considering that the Coens and P.T. Anderson and Scorsese and (to a lesser extent) Quentin Tarantino are still around I don't think it's as hopeless as it seems. :)
For a while they were genuinely talking about doing a TV spin-off/sequel set after the end of the film narrative, but ABC opted not to proceed with the idea. Probably a good idea given the film was more than a bit naff
"How much time do we have Dr. Helmsley?" Thank you Worst Actor in the World. You are the final seal of approval on my prejudicial review of this film being terrible. I will NOT be going to see this.
By the way that made me think of another point re CGI....I feel really sorry for all those professional animatronics experts and professional stuntpeople who spent years perfecting their skills only to be made redundant by the growing CGI industry over the past decade. I know people have to move with times etc etc, but it must be gutting for someone who dedicated their life to animatronic special effects only to find their career destroyed by producers who nearly always opt for CGI nowadays.
I hate myself for saying it, but I loved it XD I wouldn't watch it at home, but .. it was mainly the CGI! The plane flying thru the carnage was just awesome! I've very much not worried about the Mayan calendar ending ... Nice to see it all ends up fine :P
This film was just a mish-mash of other disaster films. You have the day after tomorrow, the core, the posidon adventure, volcano, dantes peak, Armadgeddon & deep impact. Watch the film and you will see just an endless parade of cut'n'paste scenes from those previous films, films which could are actually better (yes, even the core!).
The 2012 London Olympics DO GET MENTIONED, how could you forget this, Mark Kermode?! Anyway, loved the movie. Oscar for best special FX. Gorgeous destruction and great exploitation movie. And ignorant people, it's not all CGI, there are some great practical FX.
This film is great. Go to the cinema, switch off your phone and disconnect your brain and you'll enjoy it if you don't think too deeply. It is a bit long though.
the only real shock to me is that Mark Kermode can review this crap in a kind of academically rigorous way. He is very funny but you can't help but think that sometimes you may be in the mood for a crap movie after a couple of beers on a Friday night. You don't necessarily want 'an important' film or a 'thought provoking' film - you just want some tat to pass the time. Films are for entertainment - documentaries or boos are for information. Rant over !
It's so true what he says about CGI v real stunts. I'm left totally unmoved by action scenes nowaday's cos you just think to yourself "Thats all basically just a big 3D drawing, big deal!" There are no "WOW, how did they do that?!!" moments in films anymore like there used to be. e.g: a) "Roger Moore" ski's off the edge of a mountain, removes his skis, and opens a parachute... WOW!!! v.s b) Piers Brosnan FAKE surfs on top of a FAKE tidal wave while holding a FAKE parachute. BOLLOCKS!
Independence day is quite old. And it had more verve than this. Besides it being a complete rip off of all disaster movies before it, it has been the modern template of the genre (Day After Tomorrow, 2012, Armageddon, Volcano, and all that jive). Another example is Battle For L.A. Crap borefest, another raging patriotic hard-on. There are ways to make cliche movies entertaining (The Raid, Cabin In The Woods, Alien, which is a monster movie in space, Pitch Black, Ong Bak, ...).
Between this film and the new Gerard Butler one along with countless others, it seems to me that Hollywood has one hell of a hate-on for pleasant, inoffensive ex-partner's new other halfs.
The worst thing about the movie: His ex-wife has a new partner who is nice to the kids, nice to her, helps fly a plane which saves all of their lives later, has glasses. The main character is a failed author, a failed husband and a failed father, yet he gets himself back into contention by doing ABSOLUTELY FUCK ALL!!! Then the stupid mysogenistic portrayal of the weak and feable woman's new partner is killed horribly, and NO ONE GIVES A SHIT. What a fucking suprise!
Classic Roland Emmerich script. Awfully drawn characters. He seems to have contempt for his audience. The bloke has basic knowledge of flying a plane so we're meant to hate him?
Mark is the only critic I know of who has mentioned Daleks: Invasion Earth on multiple occasions.
Yea they really nicked the idea from that me hole
My kind of critic.
I love the way he's widely gesticulating and getting animated whilst Mayo is barely paying any attention ha ha.
Kermode is right to be skeptical. The Italian PM would have been first in the queue for a berth on one of the ships. And he would have brought half a dozen leggy girls for an on-board Bunga Bunga party.
@@stevenborg102 To be fair all those people were Chinese so even in the Ark the Chinese will be in majority like the earth’s population.
Dara O’Brian’s skit on this movie is absolutely legendary.
The LATINOS are MUTATING
Three-headed hydra coming out of the back of a jet plane - that actually sounds pretty awesome...
Godzilla KOtM
"I'll just draw it on a computer" I think there is a bit more to it than that Mark.
haha i love the good doctor's platitudinous, patronising carl sagen-esque 'message voice', sums up the tone of these latter day effects movies brilliantly
9:27 Regarding Live and Let Die, the car stunt was fantastic, then they played a frigging slide whistle over the top and totally ruined it.
Dog getting out of teh fire was also showcased in Independence Day.
phuturephunk that was my first thought too
Kim Newman (Empire) and Peter Bradshaw (The Guardian) both said that 2012 is somewhere between unwatchable and unmissable. Absolutely right, because its so fundamentally terrible, there is certainly a level of enjoyment towards the film.
"It's Russian, eh?"
Worse... he was Ukrainian that then became Russian over the course of the movie. They clearly did not care as long as there was an accent of some sort.
'There's no skill in CGI' I imagine it's not easy to master that technology.
He's right through that the 1970s disaster movie had some amazing stunts and sets, not a video game style graphics of a car driving through a glass building as it collapses.....
My only experience of this film was walking in on my older brother watching it, there was some stunt scene involving cars falling out of a plane
"Wait for the manufacturer close-up"
BOOOM
Chrysler
Actually the Olympics do get mentioned.
You mean the poll tax riots or clashes.
'The neutrinos hav?e mutated.'?
This film is actually a LOT worse than Mark makes out. He didn't even mention all the praying.
I was working in a shop renting out DVDs when this movie was released on DVD. Oh all the hours spent watching this movie in the shop because we would screen new DVD releases... many many of my brain cells were sacrificed
You were on the front line there Rachel. :)
😂😂
My favourite Mark quote was from Back to the Future 2, describing Marty's jet boots as "rockety hoverboots."
He's a hoot to listen to.
Even when the mountains are falling and the seas are rising, HUMAN beings...
fuck me mark kermode can talk
Yes talks crap, its not to be taken seriously its a roller coaster ride of action mark only like mary popping
0:45 The exasperated stammering going into "here's a clip" 😂
I just got home from seeing it. I thought it was hilarious. All the action scenes are incredibly far over the top and beyond any semblance of reality, all the dialogue and characters are incredibly cheesy and dumb, and huge portions of the plot are nonsensical and idiotic. It really makes it feel that it is actually some kind of lampoon of big budget movies more than a genuine attempt at a real movie.
It was 'The Man With The Golden Gun', not 'Live & Let Die' by the way Mark
Mark being pissed off that 2012 stole its plot from Dalek Invasion... it just sustains me.
Terminator Salivation would have been a way better film than what we got.
That was actually "Man with the Golden Gun"
When CGI becomes just a crutch for lame films with no storyline, that's when I really get disillusioned with it,
don't get me wrong, I was bowled over when CGI came out in films like
Jurassic Park and IMHO it can still work wonders in films like LOTR,
Pan's Labyrinth
and some Pixar films, but for me Hollywood is relying on it to
carry mediocre films far too much.
@maximuslaurius I disagree, Independence Day was a great blockbuster popcorn movie, it really was, it was the first of its kind to bring the destruction to Earth on such a level.
Will Smith gave a charismatic, funny performance, the film never took itself too seriously, the plot was simple and uncomplicated and actually made sense, there was no bizarre backstory or long explanation bits. It was spectacular, well directed and really good fun, it did EXACTLY what a good disaster movie should!
The car flip was from MAN WITH THE GOLDEN GUN not LIVE AND LET DIE.
And yes, i agree with this review. Terrible movie.
👍
It wasn't Live and Let Die, it was The Man With The Golden Gun, and the scene was ruined by a whistle effect.
Terminator Salivation - one of the funniest thing's the good doctor has said.
I think you've more or less hit the nail on the head with your last sentence. It all boils down to "suspension of disbelief". Your right in saying that an obvious stunt is just as irritating as obvious CGI, but this is because anything that suddenly brings your mind out of the film and back into the reality that you're watching a movie amounts to bad story-telling on the directors part. This is why I hate bad (obvious) CGI, because it will look so out of place that it bursts the bubble...
The worst thing about the film for me was that everyone I knew suddenly kept talking about the stupid Mayan Prophecy, thinking that the world would end in three years time.
And there was me just sitting there rolling my eyes and thinking, making a very underwhelming film is bad enough, but getting everyone worked up into believing the balderdash that conceived it is just Vomit-inducing.
So right about Daleks' Invasion of Earth - 2150 AD.
Hey MrHokeykokey I couldn't agree with you more. I recently got the French Connection on DVD andwatched it for the first time in probably 15 years and the car chase was totally breathtaking and left me feling quite shattered (I am a professional driver so it has a more pointed effect,perhaps) On the other hand I recently watched Knowing and apart froma brief sharp intake of breath as the plane dropped out of the sky I found myself thinking"Nice CGI" not "Wow - how the hell did they DO THAT!!"
That's Man With the Golden Gun with a car not Live and Let Die.
@Ryanmiller70 I respect your opinion as well, but apart from the visuals the film lacked everything. As I have started to devlop an intrest in film, I've become more critical of them.
can roland emmerich make a movie apart from stargate that is not about disasters??? independance day, the day after tommorrow, 2012, even dean devlin made the abysmal geostorm, how many times can you recycle the same idea?
He did Anonymous, an ungodly boring and stupid movie about the weird theory that Shakespeare didn't write his plays. Instead they were written by some guy who was Elizabeth I's lover or something. I managed to get through about half of it before I couldn't take anymore of the absolute stupidity of this story.
I liked the Russian oligarch. And I really liked the cynical US politician played by Oliver Platt. It was a pity that the failed-author-and-failed-everything-else character survived. What I noticed most was the sheer paranoia and conspiracy-mongering in the film: if the same old loonies survive, what is the point of beginning again ?
I now feel bad for being an American. Well as long as we have Clint Eastwood, there is some hope for cinema, and well other directors that know film.
Hi padster123, you make alot of good points re people's expectations of movies (annie hall, etc), but I thought I should point out that I personally wasn't belittling CGI as an art. I agree it takes alot of skill to create the effects in blockbuster movies, and I do enjoy the visual effects, but the point i was making was that you just don't get that same instant gut reaction, that heart-in-mouth feeling, from a CGI stunt that you do from a "real" stunt...
heh, the Olympics did get mentioned. Easy to miss of course.
Perfectly said my Friend, give me Daniel craig full impact Bond as opposed to Pierce in front of a green screen anyday
The Bond film car reference was The Man With The Golden Gun . .
He's wrong about the olympics. They were mentioned. In a CNN cut, it mentioned that the 30th olympics had been cancelled.
Still no sign of the Director's cut
excellent review - rubbish film
the effect were even ruined because of characters making one liners when skypscrapers were about to fall on them and Cusack suddenly turning into a stunt driver... it was contrived crappy nonesense. 2001: A Space Oddysey has miles better effects and is actually a great film in itself.
He was wrong about the dog, its from Independence Day.
Hi MartinandFreddie, yeah thats exactly what I was trying to describe: That physical, gut-reaction is what always seems to be missing whenever I see an obvious CGI scene in a movie.
"If the budget was less it'd be 2011" looooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooool
The dog jumps out of the way of an inferno in Independence Day. It's a retriever or a labrador.
Flippity-jibbit is a great phrase. People should use it more. Lol
Possibly the dumbest movie I've ever seen given how seriously it takes itself.
...(cont) e.g. If I see a CGI car chase I will be enjoying the scene and appreciating the visual spectacle but no matter how inventive or over the top it is it won't make me react physically, whereas if you watch the car chase scene in French Connection for example, not only are you enjoying the scene but your pulse starts racing and your body tenses because you know that the risky driving that you're watching did actualy happen in reality to a certain extent, do you see what I mean?
That car stunt was from The Man With the Golden Gun not Live and Let Die.
I think Brad Pitt may just be about to star in it. 2012 part Z
That flipped car 🚘 was The man with the golden gun and not live and let die !
You LIKED INDEPENDENCE DAY!?!? - ohhh dear Mark, what happened to you 🤨
2012 is just a mix of 2 movies. Day After Tomorrow and Deep Impact. That's it.
I agree, though considering that the Coens and P.T. Anderson and Scorsese and (to a lesser extent) Quentin Tarantino are still around I don't think it's as hopeless as it seems. :)
Next you will be telling me they should make a '2012 part 2'
For a while they were genuinely talking about doing a TV spin-off/sequel set after the end of the film narrative, but ABC opted not to proceed with the idea. Probably a good idea given the film was more than a bit naff
9:00 terminator salivation 🤤
The olympics actually do get mentioned
Yea a Doctor Who reference
"How much time do we have Dr. Helmsley?"
Thank you Worst Actor in the World. You are the final seal of approval on my prejudicial review of this film being terrible. I will NOT be going to see this.
...that Daleks Invasion of Earth plot seems similar enough to The Pirate Planet
Arianrhod Hyde tbf every Silurian and Sea Devils episode has the same plot. And most Dalek episodes have the same plot.
yeah they both have the same plot and keep in mind they where shown 1 after the other.
By the way that made me think of another point re CGI....I feel really sorry for all those professional animatronics experts and professional stuntpeople who spent years perfecting their skills only to be made redundant by the growing CGI industry over the past decade. I know people have to move with times etc etc, but it must be gutting for someone who dedicated their life to animatronic special effects only to find their career destroyed by producers who nearly always opt for CGI nowadays.
let's not forget the most odd product placement ever.
they do mention the olympics..according to the movie they happen in december ..i mean its one thing 2 be historically inaccurate
I hate myself for saying it, but I loved it XD I wouldn't watch it at home, but .. it was mainly the CGI! The plane flying thru the carnage was just awesome!
I've very much not worried about the Mayan calendar ending ...
Nice to see it all ends up fine :P
I went to see an entertaining end of the world movie. Nothing more, no masterpiece. And I was surprised when I saw the big boats. So good enough.
didn't you listen to the rest of the show?...
Dr K obviously was out for a piss when they mentioned that the 2012 olympics were cancelled.
He's fundamentally right though, it's a shit film.
Kermode got it wrong. The Bond stunt is in The Man with the Golden Gun not Live and Let Die.
It's a bad disaster movie - but it's a pretty good comedy about disaster movies.
way to go mark right on
"flibbergibbet"
This film was just a mish-mash of other disaster films. You have the day after tomorrow, the core, the posidon adventure, volcano, dantes peak, Armadgeddon & deep impact.
Watch the film and you will see just an endless parade of cut'n'paste scenes from those previous films, films which could are actually better (yes, even the core!).
as far as disaster movies go, it was great.
Saw it twice in a move theater. Everybody dies, it was awesome.
BOOMER WILL LIVE... Oh, wrong movie.
Not bad at all on a rewatch. John Cusak always an easy watch.
LOL I've never even seen the movie and pray I never have to. But I do feel your pain..
So in a nutshell...."The Knowing" is better
The 2012 London Olympics DO GET MENTIONED, how could you forget this, Mark Kermode?!
Anyway, loved the movie. Oscar for best special FX. Gorgeous destruction and great exploitation movie. And ignorant people, it's not all CGI, there are some great practical FX.
I liked it. Especially the first hour.
This video gave me terrible anxiety
This film is great. Go to the cinema, switch off your phone and disconnect your brain and you'll enjoy it if you don't think too deeply.
It is a bit long though.
the only real shock to me is that Mark Kermode can review this crap in a kind of academically rigorous way. He is very funny but you can't help but think that sometimes you may be in the mood for a crap movie after a couple of beers on a Friday night. You don't necessarily want 'an important' film or a 'thought provoking' film - you just want some tat to pass the time. Films are for entertainment - documentaries or boos are for information. Rant over !
The film maybe well acted, visually intriguing & stylish, however the effects, script & direction are predictably poor. (40%) (2/5 stars) (mixed)
I like cheesy disaster movies, like Twister, The Day After Tomorrow, Dantes Peak and Deep Impact. But I thought 2012 was just incredibly boring.
It's so true what he says about CGI v real stunts. I'm left totally unmoved by action scenes nowaday's cos you just think to yourself "Thats all basically just a big 3D drawing, big deal!" There are no "WOW, how did they do that?!!" moments in films anymore like there used to be.
e.g: a) "Roger Moore" ski's off the edge of a mountain, removes his skis, and opens a parachute... WOW!!!
v.s b) Piers Brosnan FAKE surfs on top of a FAKE tidal wave while holding a FAKE parachute. BOLLOCKS!
Independence day is quite old. And it had more verve than this. Besides it being a complete rip off of all disaster movies before it, it has been the modern template of the genre (Day After Tomorrow, 2012, Armageddon, Volcano, and all that jive).
Another example is Battle For L.A. Crap borefest, another raging patriotic hard-on.
There are ways to make cliche movies entertaining (The Raid, Cabin In The Woods, Alien, which is a monster movie in space, Pitch Black, Ong Bak, ...).
9:00 Terminator: Salivation 😆
Feeble has three "e's" so before trying to use big words to make you feel better about yourself get the basics right.
Between this film and the new Gerard Butler one along with countless others, it seems to me that Hollywood has one hell of a hate-on for pleasant, inoffensive ex-partner's new other halfs.
CGI requires no skill eh? I think theres some digital animators who might have something to say about that...
... and you're going to get crust movement. So the pa- ... everything's goi- ... the thing go- ... oh ptshhhh, here's a clip that'll explain it.
@FakePlasticJames
It's a Labrador Retriever.
@merton8181 It's just another popcorn nightmare. No reason to analyze.