Are Women Attracted To Muscles? Lex Fridman On The Ideal Male Physique
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- Опубліковано 4 лип 2024
- Lex Fridman Original Video: • Are women attracted to...
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I think when it comes to attracting women, just do 3 sets of being tall, 3-5 sets of handsomeness, and lots of bank account building, about 7 days a week.
Oh, and don't skip personality day.
You missed the fame/ pre selection part which is the ultimate equalizer
This is 100% correct
Yeah being tall really helps tbh. I dont care about my length. Im 178cm so average at best where I live, however its day and night difference for my taller friends (190-192cm). No amount of muscle will top that.
Lesson I take from this is life be always be fair, and if you are truly in peace with yourself women will come anyway as long as you maintain your physique, social status, money etc.
I can say being 6'5" is definitely a greater benefit to me. I'm decent looking enough. I see a lot of guys around my height or taller who lucked out with height but just look goofy or are excessively overweight. My socisl awkward ass as lost many chances that were basically handed to me otherwise, because I don't have social skills.
I may or may not be high functioning autistic. Lol I was told I should get tested, by a therapist I saw specifically for my social anxiety and dating issues. Because I've never actually been in a real relationship. Not one long enough to be considered one, any way.
@@kronaperthro Social anxiety requires more exposure to social shit. You have to try out stupid stuff and get rejected a lot to get out that awkward shell.
Ive slept with a good amount of women within these last 2 years, before that I was INCREDIBLY awkward and anxious. I think the only thing stopping me from getting into a relation nowadays is my ego lol
"Drug abuse as a result of insecurity" is one of the truest things you have said.. This is why Derek is a real one!
true, but if all things I can literally understand why someone would abuse over insecurities. Not saying it's right but insecurities have negative effects on life as well, so I can't doc someone for having a desire to work on it. I don't juice but I'm just saying if it's from insecurities, I get it lol. ❤
If he would at least admit that he is /was very insecure then it would be respectable
@@rokanza2293 Him saying that steroids is for insecurity, while also taking steroids is enough said. I don't think he physically needs to say those things when he falls into the categories of what he is talking about.
@@Zakkary Disagree
@@Zakkary hes on trt and he barely works out be takes for well being Knucklhead
Starting with lifting weights, I thought I would get compliments from women. 96,5% of all compliments I got for my gains were from dudes 😂
Women do not compliment you unless you pay them
50% of all my compliments i get from my mother, the other 50% is from dudes online lmfao
Same
Yes, being good looking is mostly genetic, but the gym enhances your overall attractiveness
same
This is spot on. What I consider “out of shape” for myself, still no problem on dates. Exact same results as “in shape” for myself.
If I get bigger, maybe I get more dudes asking for my splits. That’s about it.
What feels better, scoring on a date or helping a bro get gains?!?
What's your split?
the fact that there is even discussion and debate on whether secondary sexual characteristics are attractive makes me wonder how unintelligent modern humans have become. this is like the most basic common common sense stuff. yes, muscles make you attractive, if just has to be within the normal resembling ranges. roid physiques are obviously not natural.
Haha i have always said that men build big muscles for other men, just like women wear a ton of make up for other women.
I have noticed the same thing and it drove me CRAZY. I used to ask myself, "What's the friggin point of training then if I can attract female attention?!"
And the point is what everyone else here is saying quite well. To say the same thing but in my own words, "It is because I want to attract my best self to be manifested as often as I can through this very short life. And I want to show any children I might have how to do the same."
It’s crazy how I started lifting to improve myself and to attractive a female. But now I’m at a point in my life where I just don’t care anymore what women think. So, now I just hit the gym to improve myself. This goes out to all my kings. Hit the gym for yourself don’t go to the gym to impress a chick because it’s not worth it.
Agreed. You'll never be able to stay consistent long term if you don't enjoy it yourself.
I do it for both. Ofc I love lifting for lifting sake, but it's also cool that it makes me more attractive to girls.
@@noahmcelravy7743 yup
@@noahmcelravy7743 saaaaaame
@@noahmcelravy7743 Much agreed, love lifting for the sake and the benefit of being more attractive to girls is great!
I clicked on this video so fast it’s embarrassing
same, sadge
LOL
Same fml
Same, but mostly because the universes im curious about are intertwining.
Yep
i was a competitive bodybuilder who won several shows. the part i hated the most was being onstage. it felt so weird and unnatural, like some warped beauty pageant, not a sport. i sometimes really enjoyed the heavy weightlifting and camaraderie in the gym. but competition day, even after winning, kinda sucked to me. and of course the incessant pounding of food was a slog and felt really unhealthy at times. there were periods i wished i had never gotten into bodybuilding. quitting was traumatic, but once i got over the trauma i was glad it was over
"...drug abuse as the result of insecurity...". Just broke the whole industry. Damn. Haha. So perfectly succinct.
I believe it was in men’s health magazine where I saw an article about a large study done to find the male body type women are most attracted to. I was in my early 20’s so this knowledge stuck with me. The preferred hip to shoulder size falls in line with the golden ratio. 1:1.618. The closer you can get to that the better. Desired body fat was thin enough to have visible abs, but not dry and vascular. That could be anywhere in the 8-15% range depending on the person. Muscle size was big enough that you can differentiate between muscle groups(you can see here are the delts, here are the triceps, here are the biceps, here are the pecs, etc...). But as Derek pointed out, not so big that they appear to be on steroids.
Basically athletic build
@@cbot375 yeah basically
But for men it’s ‘diced to the fucken socks’ knife emoji times two biceps emoji
Brad Pitt in Fight Club, having his face is also a bonus
@@bencook5468 his face would be the main factor for most women
Being lean is much more important than being muscular if you’re doing this to be attractive. Muscle does help, but really you’ll get more compliments from men than women about muscularity.
Lean is the key for sure!
Spot on.
True but coming from a super skinny background makes me cringe every time i hear that. You gotta have a good chunk of muscle too.
That perception is pretty skewed though because random women usually don't compliment you, whereas men do pretty often.
You gotta have some muscle on you too. Get big and lean.
I think it's important to note how our physique affects how we fit in our clothes. Most guys aren't walking around with their shirts off in public. Your level of fitness dramatically affects your fashion and that's what people notice. Not necessarily how lean or bulky you are especially depending on your outift choice. Shit matters man
For a natural guy, a little fat can make you look bigger and better in clothes (within reason… you should have a flat stomach, etc.).
@@FreedomFox1 You're way better off with abs than a flat stomach, your face gains and arm veins will signal attractiveness without having to take your shirt off, your abs will seal the deal
i think that's mostly because you develop a taste for beauty, because as a bodybuilder you start to look at things differently because you're contstantly busy sculpting your body and thinking of the next move.
This is a seperation of that what is ugly and that what is beautifull, so you end up evolving that too in your sense of fashion.
@@signs80 abs are overrated as fuck. If your face looks shit at 17% it won't look good at 10. Actually will look worse, like some thin malnourished smeagol. If you like being lean, go be lean, but chicks truly don't give a fuck. You should look somewhat big in clothes (which is easier too with higher BF) but at the point where she sees you naked, it really doesn't matter at all if you have abs or not. Just put ur dick inside her and let her scream lol.
The only reason to have abs is to gain men's attention on the beach/contests/raves/instagram. And idk about u, but I think IG is toxic and my 14% bodyfat physique looks better than 90% of other guys' physiques without even trying that hard
Hi there, woman here.
Here are my 2 cents.
I tend to be attracted to athletic men. As in men who do athletic things. Maybe its weight lifting, or it could be swimming, rock climbing, dancing, various sports. All of those physiques will look different.
I agree on shoulder to hip ratio- but it really does not need to be extreme.
I have never dated a tall guy. But that being said- I dont want to feel bigger than my partner. So even if you are short, having some musculature can really make up for that.
When I have been attracted to weight lfiters, they have historically have some extra fluff to them. I eat ice cream. I dont really wanna date someone who wont ever have dessert with me bc they need single digits.
Mirror selfies with flexed biceps are like the male version of duck face selfies.
At the end of the day, every one of my partners have looked totally different. But they have all been awesome people. So make sure you are working on self development in tandem with developing your physique.
But thats just me.
In my opinion, muscle to women is like boobs to men. Absolutely none, we got a problem. A wheel barrow full of them, we also got a problem… but there’s a sweet spot in the middle. Now… of course, there are some weirdo outliers that have extreme fetishes but those are very few and far in between. In conclusion, your peak natural physique will do far more for you on the dating market than an enhanced one.
Funny as it is thats a great analogy
I agree lol
I like them big so maybe I guess I’ll get bigger 😭😭😭
EXACTLY 🤙🏻
This... makes sense.
I remember a post I saw once, made my day.
A chick was posting a pic of Henry Cavill. She was using him as an example of a guy that “goes to the gym once or twice a week, doesn’t think about working out too much”. 💀
Henry Cavill? That’s a dad bod bro
Lmao. Yeah, the average woman won’t know that to reach your genetic limit in terms of physique requires immense dedication. However, there is something to be said about how easy it is to maintain once you get there. 2 full body sessions per week, going hard, would be enough to minimally stimulate the muscle just barely to prevent atrophy. But, Henry Cavill is a gym rat, and I respect that.
Women find 85% of men to be below average in attractiveness 😂
After 4 to 5 years of going to the gym 6-7 days a week I tried 3 or 4 days a week for a month now and seen way better gains even though my gains were insane with more volume they were even better with less. I PR every workout with either +1 rep or more weight. High intensity low volume has been working very well for me. My gains with a high volume workout came fast but plataeud fast. And they're going back up now with 3 to 4 days of rest. My genes give me leeway to train as frequently as I want but if you have the discipline to rest you'll get more gains in the gym and in life as well since you have more energy ans time to work on other things. I don't even track my diet properly and Def not a high protein diet
Yeah I noticed women think it's easy for men to get jacked because they see some dude online that's on the sauce claiming he works out a few times a week and has a IIFYM diet. But if you go around telling women you like bikini models they'll look at you like you're unrealistic for expecting something that's nearly impossible to attain.
Having a lean body with visible musccle definition definitely adds a significant amount to overall attractiveness, after my first year of working out i didnt gain a lot of size but i gained a lot of muscle definition and when i went to the beach i noticed women just staring at guys who were shredded and when i would walk past them i could see out of the corner of my eyes them just looking me up and down. Women are just as attracted to bodies the same way men are
Yess! Guys appreciate shed as much as a woman. It takes discipline
@@martinezjames83 I do like a good shed.
I honestly think that good posture is seriously underrated. If you stand up straight, correct your forward head posture and anterior pelvic tilt, you will see a dramatic improvement. Everything else is just icing on the cake.
Honestly don’t care i don’t workout to please women I workout to stop myself from depression and jumping off a bridge 👍🏼
Haha facts bro
This is it.
Working out saved my life.
But Jackie chan can survive bridge jumping so....
Nailed it...
@@chaboi7 what is a Jackie Changed?
I’ve been bodybuilding for 10 years and the majority, like 90% of the compliments and comments I get are from guys 😂
It’s like driving a sport car.. majority of the compliments I get are from guys.. woman really don’t give a shit.
swole, thic, tight
that's coz men are more attracted to muscles than women
@@brandoncarroll9155 true, they don't give a shit. if they care about anything, it's that you have the ability to earn such a car but not the car itself
Past a certain point of musculature, you are lifting for and to compete with the bros. It’a a fact. Same way girls are critical and can be admirers of each other’s fashion choices. Whereas us guys don’t give two shits if some girl’s shoes match her outfit. I don’t even notice her shoes
Man i just love Derek, dude takes 2:30 minutes length clip and makes a 25 minutes reaction video, never change (fire emoji)
🐐
Lol does your phone not have a fire emoji
As natural dude who is 36 and have lifting for 15 years, yes muscles matter. I get way more looks from women than I did when I was younger but I've never been overly muscular just lean and shredded.
Yep
Yep.
It matters as you get old (over age 30) a lot more than it does when you're young. Being lean is really 98% of having a nice body though, you don't even need much muscle mass at all
As a natural dude that trains for specific sport based on relative strength, so is lean and shredded, but small af - not sure you can even tell by my physic in clothes if i trained a day in my life.
@@signs80 Completely false. The more muscle you have, the bigger and more threatening you look when wearing clothes. If you have an otter mode type of physique, you might look good but you won't look intimidating.
This was vintage Derek. Even though your channel is super successful now, this was like a trip down MPMD memory lane. Love you bro!
Yeah! His new videos don't interest me as much this was the first one I've watched in ages
Yup. The algorithm knew I would love this one. First video of his on my feed in almost a year lol
Facts man
@@jacobshalvey yes bro he knows 💯
Women typically don’t like a guy with muscles because they aren’t in shape themselves. They don’t like to have to chase or feel the need to keep up visually. If you both work out then you both set your standards higher. In my humble opinion.
Yeah this facts I stay 12-12.5 year round and occasionally cut down to 11% and I really only go for fit girls (I’m definitely picky), unless they thick in the right places 😂 BUT approaching women I always get good responses
The first thing my gf said when I started getting into shape was “stop because you’re going to leave me”
@@manilowgamer she said stop because she knows that other women are going to start sliding through lol. You girl doesn't want the competition and motivation to be better
thats the most retard reason i've seen so far lmao
I'm hitting the gym for the mirror. That shit is the best feeling. Seeing progress and being proud of yourself and having no need for others verification
The physiques demonstrated in the ancient Greco-Roman and Renaissance statues are what I believe are the ideal in terms of male attractiveness. They are lean, muscular ( but not too big), and generally give off an athletic vibe. Basically, they look like an in-shape hunter/warrior who could fight well in hand-to-hand combat, run at distance if needed, and protect himself, his tribe, and his woman and children.
Having a lower body fat percentage is by far most important. How much muscle mass you have barely matters unless you’re at the extremes. Just workout how you like
def not. skinny and shredded is worthless
@@RampFisha to you. There's def a demographic of women into that body type
@@RampFisha skinny ANS shredded is more than enough if you’ve got any other decent feature about yourself
@@rsspartanz Facts. You can do better by adding some mass for but there is an army of skinny guys who could get into relationships fairly easily if they just put any effort into social skills, grooming, any kind of ambition, even if minor etc... but have sold themselves that adding mass is a magic ticket.
@@themarathoncontinues4211 shredded is more off-putting than a guy being really overly muscular
I always say "healthy" is attractive. Healthy body, healthy financially, and healthy emotionally. Those will always be the most attractive features, but it doesn't ensure a connection and lasting relationship! Stay healthy my friends!
Well in these times “healthy financially” is asking for too much since you be lucky to even have a part time nowadays. Tough times
@@theworldisimmense true shit
True healthy is the bar
I couldn't give a shit what women think of my body, in fact when a woman says she finds men who workout unattractive, that often gives me the incentive I need to get me into the gym.
Fortunately my wife loves the way I look and encourages me to go to the gym if I'm feeling tired and unmotivated. That's the only person on the planet I need to impress.
Just because you're married doesn't mean you should ever slack and get lazy with your looks. Always remember that.
@@LeeEverett1 cant neglect anything in merriage. Its like a good campfire. You cant lay back once lit or it will die out, or someone else will poke it for you.
I think not just women but anyone who thinks working out is lame or makes you unattractive are mostly spoiled brats or lazy fucks who don’t know value of hard work. As someone who has been working out with kidney issues, it takes a lot of work just to get basic V shape, having defined muscles takes years of work if you are natural.
@@LeeEverett1 so you're saying I should quit working out, and take up tennis, to be the physique the average woman prefers. Even though my wife won't find me so attractive anymore. Sounds like a good plan, I'm assuming you're not married.
I'm really happy someone as respected as you in the community has said it, i've done so for years. Dudes need to stop blasing steroids for no reason, a naturally attainable physique can be as, if not much more attractive to most women.
You dont even need a bodybuilder physique to attract women. A natural swimmer/fighter body is enough for them. But 2 things that u cant change about yourself (height + face) are I think primordial for them.
We gym bros start from insecurity, lol. I looked to young for my age and wanted some more giggity action, getting ID'd despite being quite far in age, so I developed a bigger body to look more manly. Eventually, you learn women also don't care about your muscles, other men find it attractive, lol. So, if you're gyming, got to do it for your own personal reasons.
Literally my reason is the same, I also did boxing so I knew how to fight. And sometimes I just want to smack the shit out of some for treating me like a kid. So I go gym for a little bit added mass. For a manly look. I'm blonde with a baby face so the frustration just got to me
Idk man when i used my first cycle i definitely got a shit load more attention from women. Dudes as well but women liked the muscle, guys were more impressed by benching.
@9λ Yeah i agree. When i started lifting i honestly was unaware of how skinny i really was until people started saying "i remember when you were super skinny". When I started training i was more anxious than anything, maybe a little bit of insecurity. This is embarrassing but I was genuinely intimidated and afraid of the free weight section for like 2 weeks when i started lifting.
I went from getting ~20 matches on tinder w/in a couple days to 90+ once I got a solid shredded physique. They 100% care dude, at least in terms of pure physical attraction
You did not start from insecurity, you simply wanted to perform and increase your odds of having the most control over/broaden your reproductive options. That is strategy, not insecurity.
So well put. Very big respect for the willingness to be clear and honest by putting your own experience into your opinions Derek. Deepest gratitude for making this channel.
In general Derek is correct - I am 6'3" & decent looking older dude (40) but pretty underweight by weightlifting standards at ~155lbs who struggled with attracting women until I became more of my goofy/joking self. Women aren't as into super handsome dudes as you would think. They actually dig charisma, humor, ambition, high character & calling them out on their BS way more than I thought.
A good book to help with doing that is "Seduce Her with Text: The Gentleman's Guide to Texting Her All the Way to the Bedroom" by Matt Artisan but I don't do the creepy over sexualized stuff and I do great with women these days. It's all about getting past the anxiety & learning the tools that help you display more of your personality in a more confident fashion. I hope this helps some random dudes out there trollin the comments!
Thanks Matt
After wanting to be a mass monster for years and years, I finally came to the conclusion some time back ago that a lean 190-200 at 5'11" is the ideal body type for me as I care more about attracting women and being healthy than stepping on stage. Women just care about the abs and cuts on your arms and around you collar bone while not being a skinny little twink. It took some time for me to get rid of the mindset that I need to be as big as humanly possible, and just like Derek talked about that desire came from insecurities.
Bro I struggle ok the daily with deciding if I want to be a horrifying mass monster of a lean gymnast type
@@specialknees6632 Do you want to attract the eyes of women or the eyes of dudes? If you prefer women, go for the lean gymnast/athlete look.
i accidentally read this as "wanting to be a mass shooter" 😂😂🤣🤣
Even a lean 190-200 is rather large. You could probably be a lean 175 at that height and still be muscular enough by normal/romantic standards (190-200 is still pretty high end on the aggregate but not overkill). Good for you, it takes a lot of work to get there.
@@specialknees6632 Lol so true bro. One day i want to be Unholy Unfathomably humongous, other days i just wanna be lean and look good
Female perspective:
Agree with shoulder to hip ratio for sure, I just want to feel like I can disappear in the arms/hug. Also agree with "not too vain" there's just too much to get done in life. Look after yourself, go work out, but if you have time for 3hr gym sessions daily, some other part of your life might be missing out..
I'd liken it to.. you probably want girl to look good, don't mind hair and make up, but do you want high maintenance to the point she takes 4 hrs a day to get ready to go out?
Literally me. I lift 3 hours every day but not necessarily because I have nothing better to do but because I love doing it. I actually sacrificed other aspects of my life because I just didn't enjoy them as much as lifting. I just enjoy lifting maybe more than the results of lifting. Maybe I should get some other hobbies and I agree with you 100%. Also it's worth to mention that I don't really lift for looks or girls even though it's definitely a nice part of lifting.
I lift 3hrs a day becase it keeps me sane, and i hate being mediocre at what I do, who the fuck are you to judge how much time a person puts into what they love. By the way, my gf takes AT LEAST 2 hours to get ready and it's okay, she loves her make up, it's her hobby. If somebody puts 3hrs a day into something, it most likely isn't out of vanity, it's out of passion, and if you can't fathom that, then you are the one missing something in life. "evuiting in modeuation" is a motto developed by mediocre people to keep the awesome at their level.
@@RagingRugbyst 2h to get ready. Are you 16?
@@Oscarhagsjo she's 27, I am 25, both have jobs, what's your point.
I have No idea how some people lift 3 hours in a session, like i take at least 5 minutes rest between sets, but it won't last 3 freaking hours!
I am very impressed Derek you made a 24 minutes video out of 2 minute video looool reallly scrapping the barrel there
I started working out for a specific purpose of getting into special operation for the military. It was all performance based (run time, swim time, max push ups etc). I honestly didn't care about my physical appearance. People saw a physical change in me and I got a lot of attention. I'd have guys asking me how did I do it, how did I get in such good shape. I had girls turning there heads and looking at me. I was attracting more women because of my look and my confidence level was much higher. I still work hard but my focus has changed as time as passed. I want to perform, be healthy, and looks is still last...but I definitely care much more about how I look now then before.
I read a study somewhere a couple years back where women were shown silhouettes of various men and were tasked to rate their attractiveness. The ideal body came out to be 24.5 BMI at 12.5% body fat.
that bmi with that bodyfatpercentage seems pretty ripped not gonna lie
@@marshmallowmann20 Yeh it indicates quite a high level of muscle mass
thats me
Yeah not happening :D thats like 6 weeks out bodybuilder tier physique. If you are exactly 6ft (183cm) and 187lbs (85kg), you are 0.5 points away of being slightly overweight with 12.5% bodyfat lol. Thats the stupidest study there is.
12.5% fat sounds easy if you are not an american but a european as average european seem to have low body fat naturally but having that body fat with that bmi sounds kinda hard as someone who is naturally around 12% body fat will most likely be way thinner than that and will have hard time gaining weight and someone at that bmi with high body fat(say around 18-20%) will have hard timem staying at 12% fat .
You could beat any topic to death and I’d listen. I think a large majority of us just like to listen to you talk. Keep up the good work Derek!
Haven't been in a relationship or really otherwise in over 5 years. Sexual relations, sure. Learning to stop to focus on myself has been one of the biggest things i've ever done with my life. Women are a dime a dozen, your time, your life, and your health, are priceless.
@Ivan Living in countless, worthless relationships over the years because i didn't understand myself...isn't a flex. Taking the time to work on one self, is a total flex and youre a d-bag if you think otherwise
@Ivan partner lmao, you mean husband or wife?
Paying for it doesn’t count bud. 😆
@@channelbree you look like Ed from Ed, Edd and Eddy
Single men die younger though.
I'm not a feminist or something but it's quite ironic to see a man commenting on two other men talking about how women feel and what they like. Maybe just ask the girls directly lol
Problem is, girls will lie in order to avoid looking shallow and because of social implications around certain men. It's like asking someone about their political beliefs, it's much more accurate to see how they act and react than it is to ask them directly
It depends on which type of woman you're pursuing for, some wants muscles, some wants looks as in looking gorgeous, some wants both. Mine doesn't care as long as I remain healthy.
Do women care if a dude is super hot but isn't on social media?
@@nihilistdurden5559 If you're going with an old school type of women, (yes there is such women like that) that sees you regularly at: library, gym, grocery shopping and etc.
u forgot money, some wants money
@@msascuinonducorduco what about college girls, like 20 year old chick's?
@@nihilistdurden5559 In general no.
I’m ugly as hell and I’m married to someone way out of my league.
She’s cheating sorry bro
Dude, you’re at worst average as far as looks go. Definitely not ugly as hell lol
Just get rid of that goofy hat and you're good bro, you're not a ugly guy 👌🏻
beauty is in the eye of the beholder... so your wifes probably not all that
I mean you’re not a ten that’s for sure but you’ve got cool guns f it
Telling the truth straight once again brother. I definitely started training just to look better and just get big. Now I'm older, I'm very happy with being leaner but still holding a decent amount of muscle.
Agreed. Some of my friends used to train for size and not athleticism. It was kinda funny to see them struggle to keep up when we played recreational soccer. Everyone thought they they gonna dominate when we showed up.
I started in order to fix my insecurities but i fell in love with the Competetive Side and now seek to get on the stage. I love this sport, i love to watch the mens open, i dont care what others think of me. Positivity
A nice body sends a message or signal that you’re able/successful enough to have enough free time to dedicate yourself to something difficult or time consuming, something extra, on top of having a job. Being average or a fat slob sends the message that you’re lazy and/or don’t have enough free time or dedication/work ethic to go the extra mile.
My view is formed from being on both sides of being fit and later become a slob because life got too hectic. If I see a girl who is in great shape I see someone who has energy and free time, someone who cares about their body, and that is attractive. If you’re fat and stressed out and poor you are not attractive
Your body is an outward reflection of your inner standards
might also mean you're on unemployment benefits.
I absolutely love Lex's podcast, I was really hoping you would do an episode with him, cant wait for it to be released
I think it needs to be recorded before it can be released. 🤣
Emotional blackmail😂
@@InDisskyS131 it's in lex's studio so I assume that they are making a podcast
@@danielzelov2615 Am I missing something here, or do you think Derek morphed into David Buss?
Two of the most long winded guys on the internet, podcast will be 5 hours long minimum
I do 3 full body workouts a week and do not count calories. Got up to 185 lbs (starting from 160) at 6'. I was already getting some attention from women but since my arms fill my sleeves it's a different game. It helps so much with confidence and I don't see the point of getting any bigger!
Same dude, though I'm still working on filling the sleeves
I do 2-3 full body sessions a week, so even if I only do one session in a week, I've hit every body part, unlike if I just do chest and tris in that single session, then everything else misses out. Over years you can build a fantastic physique this way.
get a bigger shirt and you will see the point 😜 I always wear xl instead of l as motivation
I also train 3 times a week...full body workout. Takes 70-90 minutes each time. I also spar in kickboxing twice a week and do BJJ once a week. So, technically I train/work out 6 times a week. I am 6'3" and I started at 211 lbs. Now I wake up at 230 pounds. It made no sense to me for a while. I didn't put on a lot of fat. Then I realized that I gained mostly muscle. Just a little bit more, but everywhere. It adds up, especially on a long frame like mine. I want to fight at LHW in MMA, a.k.a. 206 pound weight limit. So I now have to get to as close to that number as I can, so that the water cut will be as easy as possible.
@@stickyrubb one tip is to use a sewing machine to tighten your sleeves. This has helped me track gains and now some shirts I don’t have to sew.
I’m 5’4 and I used to work out when I was 12 -17 doing push ups and a little bit of weights. I a wide back for my Height probably from working out at a young age .I was never super huge but was lean and cut with abs.despite my height I was surprised at how women would react to my body. I had hot girls clawing at my abs multiple times . Women definitely care about looks although making them laugh is also a huge factor. I think people severely underestimate how much a lean muscular body can make.
Nothing worse then gassing out in bed. I stopped all cardio after highschool and only lifted. Didn’t really notice it until like halfway through my 2nd year of college 😭😭
Damn bro rip. Do some jump rope
So u saying cardio irl helps cardio in gym?
@@TeemoForLife I played sports in high-school as cardio then just lifted in the gym on college and noticed getting tired having sec for the first time
Bruh she turned around with sweat dripping on her back to see Dan bilzerians twin when he was coked on three pills of viagara
@@calebbrown1677 i've done both lifting and long runs, when i started running the sec improved soo much it was like i became superman, a good balance is really good, i lift 2-3 times a week and i run twice 7km in like 27 minutes, having stamina and strength feels amazing,.
Respect you man. I love your perspective on things as you have been through a lot of experiences. Your experience made you who you are and I appreciate your perspective.
i think i can speak for most people is that we hit the gym to impress the opposite sex, but than we end up not caring much if at all about it and we just fall in love with ourselves and focus on self-improvement rather than attraction.
the appearance is the side benefit. I just like seeing my body get stronger over time. Feeling the natural potential of your own body is a awesome feeling.
They're attracted to the algorithm
Women have a far more static and idealized preference when it comes to male beauty than men will ever have for females. Women have always universally preferred strong jawline, V-taper abs, six pack, pecs, shoulders, and good arms. There was never a “Rubenesque Period” for men. All women will universally agree on the similar features that make a man beautiful. Whereas, men are FAR more variable in their preferences for idealized female beauty (hence why there are so many niches of Porn ebony, Asian, blue hair, red head, midgets, whatever). Women love muscle because muscle is dominance, and dominance is masculine. Masculine is sexy.
I like skinny toned women with pert breasts and ass, and smooth from the eyebrows down.
Only men care about muscles lol. The hottest fitness chicks are hooking up with some skinny pot head or dad bod dude. Trust me….I have seen it going to an uni gym and working at bars
Just be tall with sharp jawline and high cheekbones that's all women want
Just reincarnate bro.
@@lol69203 Chad is eternal. He does not reincarnate. He just is. You must embrace the Chad within. We all have it, you just must strip the outer shell of soy that is preventing it from breaking through.
I used to think I was fat and ugly, then I got broken up with and started to put myself out there again.
I actually did well with girls and many thought I was an athlete or muscular, mind you I’m 5’8 at 25% bodyfat.
Essentially, y’all look better then you think. Be confident and be you.
6'1 225 pounds, jog, calisthetics and heavy lifting. they used to think im on gear and I was always depressed despite looking above average.
for most of us it's like u called in your comment. it's a mental game.
Honestly just have healthy habits and don’t give a shit. If someone can look at you and tell that you are fit and take care of yourself that’s the goal.
I'm 5'8 and a bit over 30% bodyfat, you are telling the truth.
Lol
There’s a line for raw mass I’ve never crossed even though my genetics allow it. The perfect blend between athletic performance and size is best, look athletic in clothes and a beast without them. As soon as you look like you might be on steroids to the untrained eye, you’ve blown it. IMO most women like muscles when they look natural and athletic
I started lifting as of 1 year and half. I am 20. Before I was skinny but what help me was I dress good and wasn’t shy. I would say now that I have more muscles I attract older women, not but a lot but I think it’s because I look a bit older. So my point is just work on yourself and you’ll see great results.
I think Derek's advice is very good here. IME you can get quite puffy as long as you are relatively muscular. So even 25-30% can work if you are closer to your genetic limit of muscle size. If you have less sub-cutaneous fat (i.e. more visceral fat), you can have a higher bodyfat percentage. Because you look more defined (face, arms etc.) all else equal.
Getting down towards 15-20% is more ideal. I don't see that sub 10-15% is necessary. Just lean to the point where you don't have a gut, basically.
If you don't lift weights, it helps to be leaner (closer to 15%). Also, there will be an optimum in terms of how your face looks in terms of being chiseled vs gaunt.
I find that women appreciate a body that is in proportion, i.e. the small muscle groups are not neglected. e.g. forearms, brachialis, rear delt, various smaller muscles in the back, abs and obliques. It's like appreciating Michaelangelo's David... it's aesthetic. And I think you get some of that if you do sport, but you can also do it in the gym.
Definitely, different women have different types, and you will attract different types depending on your appearance.
Male selection by females on/off birth control also matters.
Several peer reviewed studies showed that women on birth control “Hormonal Pregnancy” sought more agreeable, less-aggressive males than non-BC groups.
They noticed a stark decline in attractiveness to their male partners, when off of BC, if they were agreeable & less-aggressive
I read the same study. Women were finding their husbands unattractive when they went off birth control to have kids. What a wake up to find out your wife only found you attractive because she was on the pill.
Sad
Appreciate you Derek. As a dude attempting to grow into his own you voice a lot of the things I know systemically but don’t know how to connect or put into words.
Best immutable attribute = Tall (6ft+)
Best attainable attribute = Fit
Not really much more to it imo.
Only tall woman prefer tall men, most of the time. I am 6'0 and I would not want to be taller that is for sure. Because you look like a stick when you are much taller than that, 999 out of 1000 times. Alot of woman don't want tall men if they are short. I know a ton like that. 5'2-5'6chicks don't want 6'8 men hahha.
My ex gf really liked my muscles, being able to hold on to something nice during seggs was a plus for her. But she did say she didn't want me to get too big. Which is crazy because the kind of big I think she thought I was going to be, would be impossible for me without drugs. Also yes other women do notice muscles. I've heard it, seen it and experienced it. Btw I'm not big. Athletic.
What is a seggs? Aaaah.. sorry, now I understand, having read again, it is "sex" :)
.
@FeO2 FeS Oh, and svagina!
.
@@Detvanliga bruh....
My ex loved my back being large and her being able to lay on me like some sort of bed (both stomach down)
The largest contributing factor to this is AGE. In both men and women, women will tend to seek tallness and largeness in their late teens early 20s (perhaps it’s due to those years being their most fertile) But I think if a woman goes into her mid to late 20s without finding a steady partner or they are by whatever circumstances not in a relationship, they will focus on maturity of mind. People with steady jobs or a descent amount of assets and ambition. This isn’t a blanket statement but in my experience fairly accurate. What do you think ?
I think late teens early 20's are when women are finding their partners and after that if a guy hasn't had a woman by 30 they will be single for life
@@dr.foxysocks2459 me single and about to turn 28 lol
who cares about women who hit the wall? they can stay alone with cats
I'm a woman. I agree with you
I think you should stop assuming what women want, women don't know what women want, they go with feelings.. they are irrational. you are trying to use logic where there is no logic in this at all. I am short, I reckon I have been in the top 10% easy compared to guys with girls. I have had girls with boyfriends stalk me after I chatted them up... if I told you what I said to one of them, you would think all sorts of negative assumption but guess what, she tried hunting me down for weeks after. I realised she had a bf and avoided the situation. Just one of many situations I could talk about. Stop thinking for Women or trying to figure them out, I do not believe we are meant to be able to figure them out. A big backbone and set of balls mentally is far more superior to height and whether you have muscles.
“No guy that is completely dialed in and no perfect individual.”
*Laughs in Patrick Bateman*
After a period of time you discover you train for yourself and your own goals. Not someone else's acceptance.
Big cope
maybe it'll take me longer but after 3 years my motivation is still me wanting to get a gf xD. I've been single my whole life and I'm sorta picky so thats my motivation and I'm a pussy.
All of the research I have read on muscularity and attractiveness has used photos of men with relatively average physiques. I have not seen any that use highly muscular natural, or enhanced, physiques.
Yet we consistently see physiques at the end of the upper natural range, as well as enhanced physiques, in popular depictions of what is attractive for a male body. For example, we see these kinds of physiques on romance novels intended for women, in advertisements for clothing and cologne, as well as the physiques of popular social media influencers.
I think there's reason to believe that physiques at the high end of what is possible naturally, as well as enhanced physiques that do not go into the "mass monster" range, are more attractive to women. However, I don't think we can conclude that from the research that has been done using very average physiques. I would love to see a study that uses actual bodybuilders at different levels of musculature and see which of those are rated most attractive, as well as how they are compared to average men.
As someone who just cameback from a cruise filled with women; I can undoubtedly, 100% say women love muscles. Lol
Cruise women is such a specific group though. IRL its only a certain age group that care about male physique as a priority (23 and under). Once they hit 25, the main priority for women is that the man is a good provider.
We get it Chad, no need to brag.
@@Romans8-9 women always care about a good physique…this is why when their husbands let go of themselves they seek a guy who still takes care of themselves.
@@LeeEverett1 bro you’re on lifting channel. Stop hating.
@@nickismia Yeah the women that commit adultery, if they're the ones you are aiming for. lol
Correct start to finish.
I've always stressed that it's not one skill/attribute comparing to another person's equivalent, women see the whole package, and we should be comparing packages (let's be mature here guys...) instead.
Fitness wise, just be as big as you naturally can while being 10-15% bf.
Be as financially successful as you can, as free as you can, smell as good as you can, get the right hair for you.
The majority of men could actually all be a 9 if they wanted to be. I know we hear a lot online of 5'5 guys or men with abnormally bad jawlines, etc, but this is not actually typical.
I'm 5'7 but the women in my life have been stunning, who I never thought my younger self would so naturally get to know, because I prize my intellect, humour, style, ethics, fitness, ambition etc all in one, I don't let non-super attributes get in the way. Yeah I wish I was taller, better beard, better muscle genetics, but... is it making a difference in the end, with everything in the balance? Minuscule difference probably.
In the end it all comes to finding someone whose values, ideals and priorities align with yours. There are tastes and preferences for everything and everybody. Don’t worry if you’re “too muscular”, “too short”, “too skinny” or whatever is that bothers you king, the ONE will be the ONE and will love you and accept you by who you are. Just remember the most important thing is that you also accept and love yourself. Keep working on yourselves my brothers!!!
@Victor Arsov gets it.
Cope
This is feminine thinking crap lol. As a man, you're not a "king" you have to work for it. If you're too fat, or too skinny, THEN YOU'RE TOO FAT, OR TOO SKINNY. And it's 100% your fault.
There's not the "one" out there that will just accept you how you are. Take responsibility, change yourself, and become a high value man. STOP THINKING LIKE A WOMAN. Be a man
@@aidanhunter6195 did you read what I wrote? What I meant by “the one” loving you by who you are is that whoever you end up marrying will love your lifestyle and will have the same values and priorities as you. I also said THE MOST important thing is to accept and love yourself, by that I didn’t mean “go beat your meat and eat burgers all day”, no, by that I meant that we have to work on ourselves to become a version that we will love and subsequently somebody will end up loving us by who we are (the best version of ourselves). And also at the end of my message I said to keep working on yourselves so idk what the hell you’re talking about. People misread or misinterpret positive messages on purpose just to feel more “masculine” when in reality they’re just proving otherwise by being affected by every comment section on UA-cam hahahah
I think it depends on the demographic you want to attract. In my experience as a 6ft dude.
At 170-180lbs ~10 bf I attracted women age 18-20
At 190-200lbs ~15 bf I attracted women age 20's+
At 220+ fat bf I attracted cougars.
Younger hotter women are more superficial as they should be.
Amazing perspective my son
Really interesting perspective. I am really not sure what my bodyfat % is, it's probably in the 22-27% range judging by eye, scale and Navy estimates. I got it probably to 20% earlier.
I think you are right, if you are young you want to be leaner. For me, similar height, 215lbs or less and in shape was ideal. Around that weight I start to see a vague 4 pack if I squint. I guess key is that you don't have a gut at that point, you have a V taper, etc.
I think it's useful to develop a comprehensive physique, with the small muscles worked as well as the typical larger ones. It's more aesthetic. But anything is better than being out of shape.
@@executivelifehacks6747 similar height aka under 6ft
At 315 @ 12% bf I attract 15-67
Younger ones also don't like body hair or grey hairs lol. So I'm done with the under 30 women. That's impossible for me.
The answer is obvious...more plates, more dates
Your channel is exploding with subs. Love to see that!
This was a good video. It's also a refreshing break from the usual videos everybody puts out every single day. Good job ...
“Are women attracted to muscles?” “Is water wet??”
Well actually yesn't
man are, not woman.
Maybe you believe that's the case, but the answer is actually not that obvious, and you'd know this if you've talked to girls before. For instance, many have told me that they prefer 'dad bods'. I have also seen guys that have great physiques but are short/not handsome and believe me, having muscles didn't help them one bit.
@@erik6473 Dude, girls say that they like dad bods until they actually meet a person WITH a dad bod. Obviously, you'll be attracted to someone who's physically fit and takes care of himself.
@@erik6473 Dad bods are gross! Those girls that say that are just insecure and do not want to be with a man that looks better than them
A lot of people forget that 'dadbod' was never meant to describe out of shape people. It was supposed to be guys who had a fairly good amount of muscle mass and did workout, but not to the point of being jacked. And they had bodyfat levels that were average. So around the 15-20% range. Essentially, in shape but doesn't live at the gym.
Derek is a thoughtful guy. I like how he breaks shit down properly.
Soccer player Christiano Ronaldo ...his physique if compared in the pro body building world might be viewed as scrawny or tiny but most women would prefer that physique in a man compared to Ronnie Coleman who had a godlike physique in the body building world .
Most woman would never choose a huge roided up bodybuílder at 300-400 lbs over a guy in good shape at 200 lbs. This is nothing new.... Ask ANYONE who have been huge. At some point you scare the girls away instead of attracting them and they think your IQ is >80
Yeah Coleman more a freak
its sorta obvious women wont like mass monsters because its literally not normal just like they wont like extremely skinny men.
Existing evidence suggests that musculature-specifically, upper-body musculature-is a major component of men’s bodily attractiveness (e.g., Dixson, Dixson, Bishop, & Parish, 2010; Gray & Frederick, 2012; Sell, Lukaszewski, & Townesly, 2017).
I love when people cite peer reviewed evidence in this digital space of mindless conjecture. Thank you, Sir! Respect.
Significant "musculature" as research defines it is much different [lower] than online bodybuilding standards. This is one of those headlines thats really easy to misinterpret and misuse in various mens spheres.
@@TheGreektrojan Yes, it is somewhat relative and subjective.
You and Lex are both making excellent content !!
Sure when I first started it was about looking better and having more insecurities but after a few years it’s just about working out and getting stronger for my own goals
I'm just going to point out the interesting thing, that you completely missed @Derek : the psychologist said "Shoulders to Hips Ratio" and not "Shoulders to Waist" which is somewhat different, especially given the standard fat distribution for males.
I've been asked this by guy friends! Coming from a woman: I think you hit the nail on the head saying men's perception of themselves is important in how attractive women find men. I think the biggest turn off for women is the man who appears vain and/or insecure in themselves. When it comes to looking for a serious partner, it could also may be an indication that they will look for validation outside the potential relationship. Great video!
Nah women still go for the good looking guys even if vain
@@jamesball5743 I don’t think it’s as common if they are muscular bro. I think they go for vain pretty boys more, but I’m also younger to be fair.
@@jamesball5743 she's right
@@jamesball5743 I think it highly depends on what the woman is looking for, whether just a hookup or something more. I dont think women care so much *about their vanity* if just looking for a one-night or fling thing.
@@jamesball5743 facts, they go for milimeters of bone structures, not muscle heads lol, sure exercises reveal the jaw structure but that's it
I started not necessarily for girls but to feel more secure. But now i just do it for my self and for my health.
Not getting notifications of new videos since your return after your time off.
Face > Height > Muscle
It has always been that way, ofc being obese will make you lose several points but it's something you can change unlike the others points.
I find height more important but face is a close 2nd
Religion matters too imo.
@@fiat_ow7876 Height isn’t the most important at all. I knew a guy who was 203cm tall and had acromegaly. Yeah he didn’t really get laid lmao.
@@nihilistdurden5559 Only talking about physical attraction here
@@nihilistdurden5559 lol no it does not
19:20 exactly
So many girls say “no hook ups” but 100% hook up for the right guy.
They make these “rules” but it’s just to make them think they have standards. Most women will bend everything they believe in if a tall enough, rich enough, and hot enough guy comes along.
I’ve never met a girl that didn’t hook up on first date
Well fking done! Explaining the perception discrepancy makes the vid and pushes it above the rest! Great job. And I'm not even THAT interested in the topic...but I still learned interesting shit...
Fully agree. I was 5’10” and only 145 lbs in high school but I was like 7-8% body fat and good proportions and I had a lot of compliments on my body from women. Not so much these days cause I’m out of shape but I was a small guy and some women weren’t into that but most seemed to think that my body was attractive at least. Don’t worry so much guys.
One of the problems I have with a lot of these claims is that they're usually based on what women _say_ they find most attractive (men also lie at times about this as well). What people say often doesn't match what they actually do. There's also some data that women's preferences can shift based on their cycle, though that's a bit more controversial. I think additional muscle mass does better than what is normally said about it. Obviously prime Dorian Yates type mass monsters really is way too much.
Yeah way too much trust going into what women are choosing at any given moment. They're so whimsical especially when it comes to attraction
There’s so many factors. Fear of saying the wrong thing when asked. Peer pressure if they’re asked while in a group.
Hormones are a massive thing. Whether they’re their cycle. Whether they’re on birth control also makes a huge difference.
I've read the same thing regarding their cycle. Basically their preference for masculine traits like muscularity and facial hair goes up during, and then afterwards there is a shift away from that. Birth control also seems to make women favor feminine traits in men more than they normally would.
Preferences changing based on cycle is pretty much FACT based on my personal experience. A woman on 5g+ of total anabolics, tend to be attracted to men on the same level of cycle
I'd chalk this up under "more dates" and I appreciate seeing more of that side of content
I got a lot of attention from women when I was fat. It actually feels like I have much less attention now that I maintain somewhere between shredded and fit. Perhaps I'm intimidatingly good looking. Either way, fitness is a hobby and health goal for me so not changing for women
Derek spittin' facts from his cabin 😁
When I was a teenager ( on Birth control) I was attracted to tall slim boy band dudes up until my early 20s
The moment I got off it and started heavyweight lifting my attention went to the biggest dudes in the gym.
I think obviously girls who train will like muscles and those who don’t could care less
I live in a country where being jacked isn’t fashionable
so I usually get approached by extremely skinny guys with a lot of confidence lol
That’s good to hear as a gym bro that gym girls are more likely to be attracted to you
There’s plenty science between hormone changes from birth control and effects on all sorts of things including mating preferences.
People don’t understand how much birth control effects women.
As a guy we mostly like slim women under 23
Birth control made you attracted to boys. Now you're attracted to men.
Can they still get you.
I personally always thought that the ideal male physique to aspire to was prime Jean Claude Van Damme.
I used to workout with the sole purpose of attracting women thinking that if I got a lean muscular physique, I would get tons more attention compared to when I didn't. I never did, infact it only helped slightly. Truth is naturally good looking guys with good genetics don't even need to workout if they've got the face, hair, and height; they'll get attention from women regardless.
I accepted that realization and now I only workout for me to feel good and feel confident with my shirt off.
What if u are a man who likes men 🙂
@@pieceocake7766 Then you have no need to worry, there are a good number of gay guy categories that like every physique imaginable
I think the most "ideal" for most women according to most of my sisters and women friends is someone like Chris Evans. Athletic, good shoulder to waist ratio, not too muscular.
Not too muscular? Idk man hes pretty fucking big
@@RoganClipVaultYT well compared to Chris hemsworth n Henry Cavill, he's not as big. But they did say Chris Evans, not cap america. Could be he's regular physique outside of Cap.
You're really saying Captain America isn't muscular lmaoo
@@100navat he is, very muscular but not as big as the others the Chris Hemsworth, Kumail, Henry Cavill, the rock etc2. He looks more athletic than a unatural bodybuilder imo.
I have found from myself the bigger I get the more good attention from woman I get on a night out. Deffo gives you a step in the door but after that you need the talk as well
you have a top though meaning at some point you'll turn more off than on but that may be something most men can never achieve also
"but after that you need the talk as well" well there's your problem, or rather mine. Absolutely zero game
@@folkmarcmetal talk is easier than you think. Just tell them what they want to hear make them laugh and your there
I've a decent body but ugly face and no women has ever shown interest in me
@@tolom9258 I’m sure your face isn’t ugly you obviously just need to work on been more confident with it. I’m not the best looking person but the muscle deffo catch the ladies eye first and then my talk game does the rest
I did normal lifting for like 5+ years and then I started Calisthenics for 2 years now. My body definitely changed alot, from bulky /strong to athletic slim due to Calisthenics and to be honest my success with women is at it's peak. I am not that big, I am like 183 cm tall and weight 82 kg pretty lean, guess I am around 10-11 % bodyfat right now. Now I get compliments from women even though I am "smaller" then the years before, when I was bigger only men complimented me about it. Being lean makes your body look way better then being buff, your faces changes alot and your veins start to show off. When I was around 88-90 kg most women didn't even mind looking at me at the beach, yes you have big arms with more bodyfat but in my experience size doesn't matter at all in that context . 15-16 inch shredded arms will always look better than 18 inch fat arms. It's the lean and healthy body boys.
Switched to Calisthebics going after planche and front lever. Changed all lifting to achieve this , physique adapting amazingly with it too and I have the same experience as you. I also do a lot of cadsio to stay lean. Have girls just drop dead staring at me at gym
I mean you can lift weights and stay a low body fat %
It’s never absurd to make a counter point to anyone, regardless of their credentials. No one is infallible.
Derek! I’m so happy you touched on height. As a short guy I’ve been insecure about it my whole life and hearing you say that you can do other things that won’t make your height matter eased my mind right away. I just needed to hear it said that way. Now I can move on from the height box I can’t check off to the boxes I can check. Thank you!
Same, but I hate that height is even something we have to compensate for. On the other hand, being short has made me achieve more in life. Still hurts though
Okay I am a relationship girl with a small number of ex-boyfriends. So that is my disclaimer. I am 5'10.5". Two of my exes were tall. Well above six feet.
The third was 5'10". Anatomically we lined up perfectly. I could have done missionary position with him always and died happy.
My personal experience is height is less important than people think. Kinda like visible abs. A powerful core is key-whether the abs are visible or not.
@@GodisgudAQW Yeah but we tall people age faster and our joints get fucked up really quickly. There is no guy above 6'4 that's ever gotten to be 105 yo.
You always want want you can't have, you always want to be someone you aren't. Just be happy with what you're given
@@maxk880 Just looked up a stat and found this: "men of height 170.2 cm or less lived 7.46 years longer than those of at least 182.9 cm." So basically, 5'7" shorties outlasted 6'0" giants by almost a decade. That's a pretty good benefit of being shorter.
@@GodisgudAQW
but women dont choose genes based on fitness as often believed, thats why there is the phemonen called "fisher runaway effect" , species literally died out because of female selection
If you look like you can easily spend an hour running at a decent pace and an hour lifting in the gym, you’re there