How to Survive a Loss of Reputation

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  • Опубліковано 28 жов 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 551

  • @theschooloflifetv
    @theschooloflifetv  5 років тому +137

    Thank you for watching today's film. Make sure you do not miss any of our future films by subscribing to our channel and turning on notifications

    • @AnjolaoluwaAwe
      @AnjolaoluwaAwe 5 років тому +1

      The School of Life thank you for this video so much!

    • @remove_kippa9578
      @remove_kippa9578 5 років тому +1

      Can barely hear you, mate, had to turn it up 4 notches above my normal level. Call me a boomer, go ahead lol
      Great vid otherwise!

    • @Andrtl
      @Andrtl 5 років тому +1

      I like the videos, but I hate title translation.

    • @allertonoff4
      @allertonoff4 5 років тому +1

      _ex cons & animals ! .. heh heh .. cracking good text/edit there man_ ;]

    • @petervey4966
      @petervey4966 5 років тому +1

      Hey boss, it's hard to hear your voice clearly over the background music in this one.

  • @Spiral.Dynamics
    @Spiral.Dynamics 5 років тому +445

    It wasn’t until I was abandoned by everyone that I realized how powerful one person can be.
    ✌️❤️

    • @LittleBird888
      @LittleBird888 4 роки тому +5

      Same here

    • @deliciousfailure2590
      @deliciousfailure2590 4 роки тому +6

      same here, i'm sure we'd have some interesting conversations based on our solo journeys.

    • @uk9383
      @uk9383 2 роки тому +3

      Same here

    • @da3musceteers
      @da3musceteers 2 роки тому

      That's bullshit. It's impossible to lose literally everyone. And if you did, maybe it is because you are a despicable person

    • @anhk08
      @anhk08 2 роки тому +1

      same

  • @Inerize
    @Inerize 5 років тому +595

    *It takes 20 years to build a reputation and five minutes to ruin it. If you think about that, you'll do things differently.* - Warren Buffet

    • @miketoyo496
      @miketoyo496 5 років тому +43

      That's sad :(
      No matter what person you are.

    • @paloma4444
      @paloma4444 5 років тому +1

      @@RPMcM09 no, we are social creatures

    • @ExistentHope
      @ExistentHope 5 років тому +1

      Reputation is more key to those in a limelight

    • @PeachPlastic
      @PeachPlastic 5 років тому +12

      Yeah, what I will do differently is not try to establish one in the first place.

  • @TheNoladrummer
    @TheNoladrummer 5 років тому +686

    "With enough courage you can do without a reputation."
    - Rhett Butler

    • @patrickryan1515
      @patrickryan1515 5 років тому +10

      Emphasis on the word 'Courage'. 6/2019

    • @suavesanjana6734
      @suavesanjana6734 5 років тому +16

      this gives me so much hope!

    • @aaronodom2158
      @aaronodom2158 5 років тому +34

      Your reputation is simply what people think of you. How you gonna get people to stop thinking?

    • @smartcatcollarproject5699
      @smartcatcollarproject5699 5 років тому +29

      True, you better have a LOT OF courage, if you have any value !
      So many narcissists and evil spirits who thrive by making up cheap libel against their fellowmen !

    • @adhdcartoon3338
      @adhdcartoon3338 5 років тому +5

      I'll think about that Tomorrow

  • @itgetter9
    @itgetter9 5 років тому +271

    Sometimes you lose your reputation because you stood up and took an unpopular position, because you believed it was the right thing to do. If this happens to you, be assured: the ancient Greeks considered this courageous and an important act for civic life.

    • @leahc9695
      @leahc9695 2 роки тому +13

      Exactly. Especially if you were innocent, or endured instutional betrayal or religious persecution etc. I feel too scared to attempt to share or be heard anymore and instead called crazy or a liar.

    • @10RBREEZY
      @10RBREEZY 2 роки тому +11

      @@leahc9695 Its funny when you think outside the box and want to express your truths. But do be labeled as crazy. When you just no longer want to be a sheep in this society. So it's like a choice either go with the masses or be labeled as an outcast.

    • @caritalamentandose7180
      @caritalamentandose7180 2 роки тому +1

      @@10RBREEZY deep

    • @thought_criminal14
      @thought_criminal14 2 місяці тому

      I've done that. Now everyone thinks I'm "super evil far right" monster just because I took a position saying I don't want my people to be ethnically replaced. How ironic, I'm advocating for their wellbeing and survival and they return the favor with malice because everyday the media they consume tells them "people like me" are bad. They can't see beyond the label others have attributed to folks like me, they can't see that I'm genuinely concerned for them and their future. They believe I'm motivated by hate because the media says so but how could loving your people be hate? Wanting what's good for your people, wanting them to survive is hate just because a person working in a publishing institution said so? Brainwashing is very real indeed.

  • @TheDoctorBoy
    @TheDoctorBoy 4 роки тому +138

    It's really a shame that a reputation can be ruined by some rumours spread by haters.
    But then again, we just have to just use it to our advantage and push forward.
    The advantage is, you'll know who the people are around you.
    The people who love us stay.
    And the fake people get highlighted, fake a smile to them and stay away from them.
    Don't let those who want to bring you down in your circle.
    Keep the ones who always believed in you.
    And when you do finally come out to be a great human being, always remember those who stood by you.

  • @mohammedbedewy9102
    @mohammedbedewy9102 5 років тому +164

    I suffred loss of reputation when I was imprisoned for one year, I lost almost all of my friends, my job, it was pretty much like walking naked down the street, painful and lonely it is, even though its getting better now, but the matter of freedom it brought to me was enormous, everyone now saw me for who I really am and they have the choice whether to leave or stay I don't really care anymore

    • @Onlinesully
      @Onlinesully 4 роки тому +9

      Mohammed Bedewy
      Well done for the good progress.

    • @Oktover24
      @Oktover24 2 роки тому +12

      Same thing happened to me, it ruins current and future relationships due to what people perceive you as. Eventually and gratefully we learn to get used to it and move on and whether people wanna be apart of our lives or not is solely out of our control.

  • @DanielIles
    @DanielIles 5 років тому +288

    Don’t let yourself confuse ego for reputation.
    *Reputation is how others see you.*
    *Ego is your own self-importance.*

  • @studyme-selftaughtlife4958
    @studyme-selftaughtlife4958 5 років тому +393

    Reputation can actually be the *DEATH* of someone.

    • @joeyshabbadoo
      @joeyshabbadoo 5 років тому +36

      If you let it.

    • @Zen-cv2eq
      @Zen-cv2eq 5 років тому +46

      @@joeyshabbadoo It's out of anyone's hands, you can be targeted by the unruly lynching mob just by appearance alone

    • @joeyshabbadoo
      @joeyshabbadoo 5 років тому +3

      TheMindofRa is that a threat?

    • @MissKellyBean
      @MissKellyBean 5 років тому +10

      @@joeyshabbadoo I don't think he meant that as a threat, but perhaps as a warning, from someone who wants you to be safe. And I think he's right. It's wonderful to not let bad reputation bother you on the inside. But there are still many places in the world where a bad reputation in your community will get you killed by someone (or thrown out of the community, which can also be a death sentence in some areas.) Those of us that live in safe, rich countries may see this video very differently than others might.

    • @RODsDIY
      @RODsDIY 5 років тому +2

      @@MissKellyBean Yes, if what you mean is that the herd acts in a more refined way in rich, more evolved societies. In my view its the same difference between a common criminal and a white shirt criminal.

  • @nicola-socialmediasuccess8687
    @nicola-socialmediasuccess8687 5 років тому +405

    Reputation is a hard currency, hard to get it and easy to lose it

    • @cambriolage778
      @cambriolage778 5 років тому +12

      Actually not in the age of social media. Look at the dipshits that call themselves influencers, they are, statistically, supremely admired.

    • @jenh9426
      @jenh9426 5 років тому

      yup, esp when you prove to your co workers that you will sell them out... they will never trust you again...

    • @despicabledeplorablemgtow3837
      @despicabledeplorablemgtow3837 5 років тому +5

      I think it is the other way around. Reputation is easy to get and hard to lose. There is a different version of you in the minds of everyone who knows you. It is how they perceive you. To a point, they control it, not you. To change that you have to do something that they perceive as extraordinarily good, extraordinarily bad or in direct opposition to what they think of you.

    • @intp9944
      @intp9944 4 роки тому

      Pina Colada Sipping MGTOW so if i made a gap year at the first year of medical university bcs my parents abused me and at the end made me do it,i put my studies in the state of stillnes from psychiatrists ,made a gap year,didn’t lost the buget ,i still don’t have to pay anything bcs i didn’t renew the year i took a gap year, and i got back after one year,i didn’t even go the year i got accepted,just one month but i had to sell some other story to people so i said i am trying to go to a even better university,i couldn’t tell my parents are retarded and they ruined my life from the moment i was born ,do u believe if i prove that this knowledge that i want for myself anyway but with the top score since that matters..i can still like prove them that i am still the same or better..when we all prepared the exam for uni and i did it for three months i started in the last momt,and they did it like whole school year ,they admired me xd do u think i can rebuild my reputation?...i have no problem with people in my year they respect me and appreciate me but other people from the past i am not sure what kind a person i am now to them..or i should just keep going with ignoring what they think bcs i never cared since i never had a problem with that i was always really successful at school and everyone knows that...

  • @ragingoaktree
    @ragingoaktree 2 роки тому +25

    False allegations can do so much harm. Some people think that false allegations against them can’t affect them because they think everyone knows they wouldn’t do such a thing. But that’s not the truth. All it takes is one person with the intent to lie to others about you to make you look bad and soon everyone believes that lie and no matter what you say or how much you try to prove you did nothing wrong, it won’t matter. In today’s society no one confirms for truth they just believe what they’re told and won’t believe the accused. Just love knowing that you know the truth and there are things you can do.

  • @eph6v16
    @eph6v16 5 років тому +30

    This is a major reason why privacy matters

    • @ghost-xx4wv
      @ghost-xx4wv 9 місяців тому +4

      I think i lost mine and its giving me a headache

  • @HumansOfVR
    @HumansOfVR 5 років тому +104

    *_With enough self-love, you can do without worrying about reputation_*

    • @leahc9695
      @leahc9695 2 роки тому +8

      Um sometimes that goes beyond that, in order to get a house or a job etc where it goes that far as to some self love and what other people think... Your whole livelihood is often ruined. Just sayin

    • @blincx1
      @blincx1 10 місяців тому

      ​@@leahc9695 No. Credit is a slavery. Mortgage also. Job, if it is worthy and you doing it the best, there is bo alternative. Losing/not getting a job is sometimes a blessing in desguise.

  • @coachbahman
    @coachbahman 5 років тому +448

    You survive this by NOT caring about what other people think.

    • @coreycox2345
      @coreycox2345 5 років тому +3

      It is if the author of this video never heard of becoming a bohemian, Your Favorite Lifecoach.

    • @DerpShark
      @DerpShark 5 років тому +42

      Thanks for the great advice that can totally be applied to real life without major consequences

    • @coreycox2345
      @coreycox2345 5 років тому +17

      I was partly joking, and somewhat severe, SeriousShark. I have found that telling people what you really think can be the best thing even if they reject you as a result. It is better to care what you think of other people than what they think of you. It seems unlikely that we can accurately predict what others think of us because we are never free of the lens of our own perception. Do you speak from experience?

    • @Nickelodeon81
      @Nickelodeon81 5 років тому +2

      Good point. I'll start by not caring what YOU think, jerkass.

    • @coreycox2345
      @coreycox2345 5 років тому +10

      @@Nickelodeon81 Nice try, but you took the trouble to insult me. It seems like you do.

  • @grottoking7355
    @grottoking7355 11 місяців тому +12

    I have to admit this is painful and its scary not knowing who knows what about you and having strangers pass nasty remarks or attacking you

    • @ghost-xx4wv
      @ghost-xx4wv 9 місяців тому +1

      I feel you bro

    • @RandomTGHfsh91747
      @RandomTGHfsh91747 2 дні тому +1

      ​@@ghost-xx4wvI saw a comment of yours in another video pretty much like this one. Having a hard time, huh?

  • @nothing_happening_here
    @nothing_happening_here 5 років тому +226

    You make it sound like it's something bad...
    "Until you've lost your reputation, you never realize what a burden it was or what freedom really is."
    - Margaret Mitchell

    • @BigHenFor
      @BigHenFor 5 років тому +11

      But freedom without responsibility can kill people. Just saying.

    • @libertario1277
      @libertario1277 5 років тому +3

      @@BigHenFor you must read more Brooks or talk with more people about the true value of reputation as innocent actions can completely destroy it

    • @spongywuver29
      @spongywuver29 5 років тому +2

      So true!

    • @Zen-cv2eq
      @Zen-cv2eq 5 років тому +11

      @@MaxArturo Friends and spouses are replaceable, there's over 7 billion+ people on this planet

    • @peposlava
      @peposlava 5 років тому +6

      @@Zen-cv2eq This!

  • @game_theory2547
    @game_theory2547 5 років тому +70

    Something that I heard a long time ago that always resonated with me was "if you don't like what people are saying about you, then change the conversation." Basically, if you give people something else to talk about then they will talk about something else.

    • @marthairene7732
      @marthairene7732 5 років тому +2

      lol always love a mad men fan gurl. very true tho

  • @Youbarkimeow
    @Youbarkimeow 4 роки тому +15

    It's mind blowing how another human being will ruin an innocent persons reputation by making up lies about them.
    I never in my wildest dreams thought there would be people that would purposely make up stories about another person to ruin their life it's just pure evil and insecurity on a higher level.
    Number one rule stay away from those who gossip and strive off of drama.

  • @ennuiblue4295
    @ennuiblue4295 5 років тому +78

    This is kind of the quandary I'm in now of tired of having to play a 'character' all day. Its exhausting trying to please everybody, much less strangers

    • @gogo311
      @gogo311 5 років тому +3

      you don't have to play a character. just sayin

    • @libertario1277
      @libertario1277 5 років тому

      Oh yo don't hace to, the only thing you have to do is do the same You do but in the appropiate moment for your society

    • @bink865
      @bink865 5 років тому +2

      Oh god I've been there friend

    • @dandrechesterfield5411
      @dandrechesterfield5411 4 роки тому

      been there, am there

  • @tooakki
    @tooakki 5 років тому +26

    If you're unfortunate to know a Narcissist or have one in the family, get away from them ASAP, it will save your Spirit and Reputation a lot of trouble.

    • @bridaw8557
      @bridaw8557 Рік тому

      Shorthand for a jerk you don’t like. Psychologizimg people is what’s in style now. Look at yourself first, ,then you’ll see how you contribute to these issues.

    • @tooakki
      @tooakki Рік тому +1

      @@bridaw8557 I absolutely observe myself FIRST, you don't know me... try that with someone else.

    • @tusharpatil9400
      @tusharpatil9400 Рік тому

      @@tooakki You both are right actually.The reality is very situation specific

  • @ninjaclone79
    @ninjaclone79 5 років тому +111

    Can't lose what you never had in the first place.

    • @xm377Moyocoyatzin
      @xm377Moyocoyatzin 5 років тому +10

      Have someone accuse you of being a child molester and see how fast that non-reputation starts to look really good next to a bad one. We all have reputations even if you don't believe you do. It's only when someone destroys it that you realize what you truly had.

    • @1594simonsays
      @1594simonsays 5 років тому +1

      Very true

    • @adaschannel2350
      @adaschannel2350 4 роки тому

      Actually your wrong. You think u right cuz you don’t know every situation that happenes to people. My best friends father killed himself just because he was accused of trying to rape his own daughter in law, while the her husband was in the orther room , in the same house. She hated living with her in-laws and , found that way to request to move out , she just jumped and came out saying that he was trying to rape her. Of course everybody believed her , and who knows how they treated him that month. He killed himslefl in about a month

    • @wakeup6778
      @wakeup6778 3 роки тому +4

      @@xm377Moyocoyatzin mine was destroyed as well

    • @grottoking7355
      @grottoking7355 Рік тому +1

      ​@@xm377Moyocoyatzin facts

  • @davegunner49
    @davegunner49 5 років тому +27

    There is nothing which ruins the reputation, the psyche and the life of an individual faster than having any type of Autism. Asperger's is the worst condition. Being intelligent, creative, caring, hard-working, diligent, talented, helpful, an introvert but lacking in social skills feels like a death sentence and a constant torment. The person only lives halfway in this world and since the brain is totally unique it's almost impossible to properly connect with others.

  • @conquestanddeath4406
    @conquestanddeath4406 5 років тому +28

    Also I love how you tell us that we should love other people for their humanity alone but then tell us that literally the entirety of society will hate us with no coming back if we have less than a shred of reputation. Yes, love the “people” that will relentlessly tear you apart without a second thought. That totally doesn’t make them complete utter bastards, doesn’t it?

    • @fulin13
      @fulin13 5 років тому +9

      Well the entirety of society will hate us because they dont actually know who we are and they dont care to think about us. What i got from this is that treating people with love and kindness is the only way for some of them to stop and think about you. Some of them will eventually figure out youre not that bad. By doing this at least a small amount of people will start seeing you for who you are, and that might be enough to survive the rest of society who doesnt listen

  • @widhay_yani549
    @widhay_yani549 Рік тому +6

    I lost my reputation once cause by the people hatred with NO grounded evidences until NOW. But slowly but sure I prove them wrong and nice things in life still happen to me right now. I make them embarrased for what they thought about me, but resiliently, I show them little by little and slowly with patience to make them see that without reputation I still be just a human being who no mistake-proof, trying to be a good with just all I have. Just don’t loose faith. Somewhere someone will find the beauty inside you.

    • @grottoking7355
      @grottoking7355 Рік тому

      How long ago did you lose it

    • @daiki0099
      @daiki0099 9 місяців тому

      lost mine by just "soundly" eating my meals at pantry all my colleague started avoiding me😪😪

    • @iamgalleryofficial
      @iamgalleryofficial 9 місяців тому

      lost mine and went viral the whole world hates me

  • @faherty87
    @faherty87 5 років тому +42

    That was beautiful. I Literally just had a thought about how my possibilities were limited by my percieved reputation and not my abilities. This helped, thanks

  • @GingerGingie
    @GingerGingie 5 років тому +20

    Once, I moved my family of 5 out of our home country because of a loss of reputation. It was devastating. Now I watch back with tea and popcorn at the implosion. It wasn't us. It wasn't them. It was a culture that never solidified before the money took hold. Good luck to you, folks. We're hoping for luck here too.

    • @Onlinesully
      @Onlinesully 4 роки тому +1

      Kartoffel Pommes
      glad your ok

  • @bink865
    @bink865 5 років тому +13

    I desperately needed this. A couple of months ago I left a particular group because I hold slightly different values to them. I am now, I suspect, a pariah. Yet I keep thinking that the only thing worse than them all hating me would be them all still liking me. As that would mean not being true to myself. Luckily I have people who do love me.
    NB For Alain: *some* fallen politicians are scoundrels.

    • @_TheDarkHalf
      @_TheDarkHalf Рік тому

      dude if its not on the internet forever you can literally shut the fuck up and find new friends cry me a river

    • @andromeda894
      @andromeda894 14 днів тому

      I too left a group of friends, among them, my best friend. I initially ghosted, but a couple of months after, I sent her a letter apologizing for the abrupt ending, and wishing her the best. I didn't explained the details of the ending of the friendship , but I left because she was always projecting her insecurities on me (that were NOT caused by me), and lashing out at me for that same reason. I never defended myself, I never set boundaries, I was for many years a people pleaser and a doormat.
      After leaving that friendship she destroyed my whole reputation, created a lot of gossip with professors from the university I went to for undergrad. Those professors don't want to have anything to do with me now. One of them was the most important professor of my entire career. My ex best friend basically destroyed me, and isolated me from almost everyone I knew from my undergrad program. It feels very unfair, and nobody cared to know about my version of the story. I have been my own support system since two years ago. I admire the people how have gone through this.

  • @Milestonemonger
    @Milestonemonger 5 років тому +14

    Maintaining a flawless reputation is exhausting, plus, a little bit of mischief is called Living.

  • @leonverbakel3889
    @leonverbakel3889 5 років тому +58

    What a beautiful video; the music, the footage, the calm voice. You made my day, School of Life

    • @Myacckt
      @Myacckt 5 років тому

      Leon Verbakel rustic does not mean ‘rustig’ ;)

    • @leonverbakel3889
      @leonverbakel3889 5 років тому +1

      @@Myacckt oof dan maar snel veranderen, bedankt! ;)

    • @Myacckt
      @Myacckt 5 років тому

      Leon Verbakel 🤗😅 haha sorry hoor

  • @jhiatt1516
    @jhiatt1516 5 років тому +5

    I’ve stumbled upon your videos through my recommendations. Every time one came up, I felt drawn in by the relevant title. These videos have such a balance, they’re succinct and easy to understand. I was originally skeptical, thinking, “well here’s another wellness channel.”
    But this content is of such value and high quality, I have difficulty expressing my appreciation without writing a novel. I wish I was your friend! Thank you so much for everything you’ve created.

  • @DarthStone
    @DarthStone 5 років тому +57

    So it’s “Yup, you’re very much fucked. Learn to live with it, move out of town and make new friends, preferably losers too”
    Thank you, School of Life. That’s what I needed today.

    • @ecman324
      @ecman324 2 роки тому +12

      Maybe the school of life isn't the answer. You will figure it out on your own.

    • @eee8002
      @eee8002 2 роки тому +5

      @@ecman324 Agreed.

    • @leahc9695
      @leahc9695 2 роки тому +9

      Exactly my thoughts (and situation). So many unsung heroes who were falsely accused too... Dying with the pain and knowledge that they were innocent and faught for the greater good. Like my dad. It's so unfair it ends this way. And the power of greater evil win, and "karma" never comes. Yet we are fed pipe dreams that the truth always comes up. Truth is more closer to, it is what it is.

    • @ecman324
      @ecman324 2 роки тому +2

      @@leahc9695 sorry about ur dad

    • @ifyourepeatalieoftenenough8500
      @ifyourepeatalieoftenenough8500 2 роки тому +2

      I think its not healthy to identify with losership but those who do are very honest, went though hell and would never abandon their morals for materialistic benefit. But apparently they seem to be quite rare. There is only one person i know who truly embodies this except me and she died ;_______; I've always hoped that great people are great because of their morals but it is about popularity. I wonder if you can be great and completly stay true to your morals. What do you think?

  • @dandrechesterfield5411
    @dandrechesterfield5411 4 роки тому +17

    I've been dealing with this off and on for about 15 years and it's awful to hear 3rd or 4th hand knowing that a lot of people who don't know you very well have a negative view of you. I haven't ever been able to completely forget what people say about me and it's a helpless feeling knowing you can't change their minds. Especially if you don't even know who is spreading the rumors. It's also especially hard when you're well known in your town in general. Add to that I have an older brother who is also well known and well liked in town. He's seen as an angel but the cost of that to me has never been worth it because he is viewed that way because he sacrifices his time and emotionally energy to be loved by everyone and I speak my mind more than he does and I'm "prickly" as I've been told. If I'm in a bad mood I don't hide it as well and I may seem uninterested in what someone is talking to me about. I won't small talk as well as my brother and so people think I'm an asshole, or cocky or.... Little do they know their negative views of me hurt me a lot. I feel like it's too late to change anyone's mind so I feel at a loss. I've also had women say, oh I heard you were a player which is the male equivalent to me telling a girl I heard you were a slut and that has always bothered me the most. Full disclosure but I do love women and I have been intimate with a lot of women over the years and I have not been dishonest with them or made promises to them so that I could sleep with them but if they sleep with me or get feelings for me and I'm not interested in being in a relationship with them then I'm automatically a player. As I've gotten older it's affected my ability to be intimate with people. I get a lot of anxiety when I go to public places where there will be a lot of people who "know" me or think they know me. I feel very shy and uncomfortable around acquaintances because they are most likely to be the people who have heard negative opinions or gossip about me. It makes me want to move and start over.

    • @ecman324
      @ecman324 2 роки тому +1

      God is with us.

  • @BigHenFor
    @BigHenFor 5 років тому +29

    A reputation is a public property, and accordingly out of your control. You have to be aware of its pros and cons. As social currency, it makes life easier but, it shouldn't be seen as a measure of your self-worth. The wisdom of crowds has its limits just ask a lemming.

  • @Je.rone_
    @Je.rone_ 5 років тому +36

    *"Your reputations precedes you"*
    A man from the middle east said this is a common phrase in his country. I believe it. 💪

    • @emilysavage2151
      @emilysavage2151 5 років тому

      Black Vito - Moneyology & Philosophy *preceeds

    • @Je.rone_
      @Je.rone_ 5 років тому +4

      @@emilysavage2151 my best friend sometimes used to tell me of his fustration with my propensity to include a typo in my online writings. But they dont call my the typo king👑 for nothing. I'm not the king they wanted but I'm the king they got
      🎭

    • @ethanfernandez3395
      @ethanfernandez3395 5 років тому

      Isn't it "precede"?

    • @Je.rone_
      @Je.rone_ 5 років тому +2

      @@ethanfernandez3395 it may be but if it is Emily is welcome to be typo queen 👑🎭

    • @Je.rone_
      @Je.rone_ 5 років тому +4

      @@ethanfernandez3395 i just googled tf out of it and you sir are correct. You corrected the corrector and correctee. You are are the goat🐐

  • @FormigaFit
    @FormigaFit 5 років тому +18

    Forgiveness is probably the strongest beauty I've ever experienced in my life.

  • @robraver
    @robraver 5 років тому +14

    well, were you popular at school? I wasnt, and got snubbed at all levels for years and years. Not everyone was unkind, got a chance of a trade apprenticeship because the other workers thought me to be ok. I tend to pass on any chances to 'losers' if at all possible. The more popular people in society are scared of losing credibility/status, when the truth is...is we all bite the dust at some point in our lives. Be who you are, if you got some close friends who might correct you at times, listen to them and take a look at yourself because they could well be right. Most people have a certain amount of give and take. I think the most tragic is when you get your reputation ruined from people telling lies. Try living in a small town, in a small country where there is no escape whatsoever. Its not fun.

  • @BrainsApplied
    @BrainsApplied 5 років тому +17

    *Be nice to everyone, offer a listening ear and show them that you care. It will be a long process but you will get there!*

    • @libertario1277
      @libertario1277 5 років тому +1

      I don't think so, maybe in developed societies. In the mayority of the world ir isnt like that

    • @xharth8136
      @xharth8136 3 роки тому +4

      Even in developed societies, "be nice to everyone, offer a listening ear" and they'll use you, disrespect you and then throw you out once your usefulness is over.

  • @josee.1308
    @josee.1308 2 роки тому +2

    You are who you are. and in reality you live in a society that is why you will always have a reputation, whether good or bad, which will be granted by others, not by you. You only have the choice to be who you are. There's no escape.

  • @ExistentHope
    @ExistentHope 5 років тому +7

    I don't really care about my reputation because someone out there will always hate me why should I be concerned how others think of me ? You can do everything good and someone will still hate you. Just respect life and life will reward you.

  • @mio3677
    @mio3677 5 років тому +15

    This is exactly what I needed right now

  • @obsidiandestroyer7015
    @obsidiandestroyer7015 5 років тому +133

    wait how did you know my current need?!! 😮

    • @Min-dh2fd
      @Min-dh2fd 5 років тому +10

      Me too! It's kinda creepy how it ended up in my recommendations. Maybe we're just noticing the things we want to see.

    • @johnbeard7252
      @johnbeard7252 5 років тому +4

      Your smartphone has ears, my friend...

    • @bink865
      @bink865 5 років тому +1

      From your internet searches...?

  • @jamiec2138
    @jamiec2138 5 років тому +5

    We are all social creatures so reputations are important. That's why we care what our friends think of us and why we put effort into relationships. I think it can be easily confused with craving applause, which has more to do with craving attention and anti-social degrees of competitiveness. Reputations represent the inherently fragile reality of human connection. E.g. Are we thoughtful, empathetic, responsible etc? Do we give as well as take? These are pro-social qualities and how our reputations (standings) rise and fall. Groups reward those that improve the group's well-being and punish those that jeopardise it.

  • @SamuelMusser
    @SamuelMusser 2 місяці тому +2

    I am a young guy in school . About a year ago, I offended someone and they spread a rumor that I was addicted to porn and that I was a pedophile. Because of this rumor, I have had my reputation impact it to a horrible degree. I don’t even know how to come back from that type of thing now all the girls at school avoid me and think that I look at them. I don’t even know what to do anymore. If I’m trying to defend myself, everyone assumes it’s just a lie. And the rumors just keep on building up. 😢

  • @chrisrogers6799
    @chrisrogers6799 3 роки тому +4

    My reputation was lost by jealousy and moving to a new state, NOT by what I had done. And even after proving I was innocent, it didn’t matter. I was still someone new who was a pariah and shamed the community for misjudging. I still had to move.

  • @daithiocinnsealach1982
    @daithiocinnsealach1982 5 років тому +27

    When you start having trust in life again everything can become good again.

    • @Onlinesully
      @Onlinesully 4 роки тому

      Vaul, Dog Warrior
      this sounds promising thankfully

  • @luistentindo6334
    @luistentindo6334 5 років тому +5

    Thanks for these videos. They're very often a source of inspiration and reflection. From my experience I think that an important distinction has been elided in the video. It's still a helpful video, but here's the deal for me. A person can lose their reputation, in addition to doing some obvious wrongs. A person can also lose reputation and experience shame and isolation and 'dark thoughts' as a result of doing the right thing. Doing what you know to be right on most levels, but to still be regarded as a pariah to others. For example, leaving a narc / abusive relationship. Or otherwise standing up for yourself against others who may be manipulating, controlling or otherwise hurtful and so on. That's all. The message is still helpful, but I wish there would be more thought to more variety as to situational circumstances and moral judgements. Thanks for reading and have a lovely week!

  • @osse1n
    @osse1n 5 років тому +100

    *Reputation: A lifetime to build, a blink of an eye to destroy*

    • @karatecow99
      @karatecow99 5 років тому +18

      That's why it is so stupid to worry about. Now to take my own advice.

    • @its_james_fitness
      @its_james_fitness 5 років тому +5

      Yours was just destroyed by posting cringey phrases that vaguely apply to everything

    • @klaviergavin5401
      @klaviergavin5401 5 років тому +5

      if 'reputation' can be ruined in a second, then it is not worthy to be worried for a lifetime. make your own' reputation' (by being kind and being yourself) and it will stay for a lifetime.

  • @KhemistrySet
    @KhemistrySet 5 років тому +28

    This will happen often if you are around narcissists...

    • @abdallababikir4473
      @abdallababikir4473 5 років тому +1

      More often, it's because you're doing something wrong.

    • @KhemistrySet
      @KhemistrySet 5 років тому +10

      Abdalla Babikir it’s clear that you haven’t met someone with Narcissistic Personality Disorder.

    • @abdallababikir4473
      @abdallababikir4473 5 років тому +2

      My brother has that...

    • @abdallababikir4473
      @abdallababikir4473 5 років тому +3

      Trust me I feel you ❤️

    • @abdallababikir4473
      @abdallababikir4473 5 років тому

      I still believe our actions can change a narcissist

  • @kristabell5107
    @kristabell5107 5 років тому +41

    Ex convicts are a great idea 😂 - come to Australia - we’ve got loads of
    Them. We don’t worry too much about reputation here. Keep ya self tidy and you’ll be fine.

  • @melorgomolox6828
    @melorgomolox6828 3 роки тому +2

    We can forgive ourselves and each other- after taking full responsibility and seeing where the mistakes are coming from. We all deserve love. Those who don't come from a place of understanding upon seeing one's position is not worth your time (they're on their ego trip). We are humans with errors- but the error mustn't be repeated if you are compassionate to yourself.

  • @magnumdujardin7297
    @magnumdujardin7297 5 років тому +6

    How to start again when the internet remembers you forever ? It's impossible. You're one search away from a reminder of your mistakes. They won't allow you to grow or change. The internet is one big chain around the individual forcing him to be forever connected to others, it's sickening.

    • @_TheDarkHalf
      @_TheDarkHalf Рік тому +3

      how this doesn't have more likes is scary, how oblivious some of these people are. Everyone thinks they're immune till the most wild shit gets made up about you and put on reddit, and even more, like me...written by the media as a public figure.

  • @nikoladanilovic5636
    @nikoladanilovic5636 5 років тому +7

    Thank you school of life! I really needed to watch this video because you've described my situation perfectly and helped me accept all the things that i should. Thank you once again!

    • @_TheDarkHalf
      @_TheDarkHalf Рік тому

      accept eternal damnation and just making friends with animals? ok dude im right there with ya pal super excited

  • @gabbieannie8025
    @gabbieannie8025 5 років тому +3

    Its so fascinating how my youtube recommendations consists of these wondrous channels, school of life, pursuit of wonder, and Sadghuru!!! Ahhhh youtube youre my life medicine!

  • @chocolatefaerie
    @chocolatefaerie 5 років тому +21

    Today's newspaper, tomorrows toilet paper. Some school friend told me in high school

  • @ahuon9946
    @ahuon9946 5 років тому +16

    what if we all learned to empathize and not judge like those who have lost reputations

  • @treyshaffer
    @treyshaffer 5 років тому +27

    I feel like the idea of a reputation is foreign to me, sounds like something people worried about in the 60s. It must be that the society I live in has gone beyond this idea, or that I'm so socially unaware so as to never have had a reputation. Either way I'm grateful, maintaining a reputation sounds like a pain the ass.

    • @BigHenFor
      @BigHenFor 5 років тому +7

      The idea that a reputation is a pain is forgetting that your reputation is your social currency, and when you rely on the regard of others to function effectively in your community - which we all do - then then you realise the value of reputation. Trust is earned. If you want the benefits of being trusted, you have to look after it. Once lost, it can be regained, but not without cost.

    • @--6904
      @--6904 5 років тому +1

      maya moon well having sex with (maybe) strangers, that everyone can see, as your job is also a crazy choice to make when there are so many other jobs you could've choosen. I mean, you should've seen what was coming by choosing that job in the adult industry.

    • @_TheDarkHalf
      @_TheDarkHalf Рік тому

      you sound just retarded, and tbh that's probably easier than being part of society. Yes everybody has a reputation. showing up on time ro your job is part of it genius,

  • @moyodinson2047
    @moyodinson2047 2 роки тому +5

    I'm in school and a lot of girl thinks I'm a fuckboy because I used to flirt a lot and used to being overly nice. So yesterday someone asked a close female friend of mine to stay away from me as I was labelled as a fuckboy. So just came here as I was feeling like losing my self esteem. And I have completely limited myself from talking to any random girl from school.

    • @_TheDarkHalf
      @_TheDarkHalf Рік тому

      im not even finishing reading this shut up. if its not on the media its yesterdays news. you know nothing of pain. girls at school talked some shit? find new girls. move towns. have your accusations blasted by mainstream media then you can cry me a river.

    • @_TheDarkHalf
      @_TheDarkHalf Рік тому

      nobody is safe. nobody. HEATH MY WORDS. the internet is the antichrist.

  • @burhanmunawar6193
    @burhanmunawar6193 2 роки тому +2

    I think the reason most people disagree with this video is because it's hurtfully true.
    There are only very specific cases when one can go back to the way things were, but truth be said they never can be in most cases.
    The only thing one can do is accept the situation and realise the ones who are true to you, that's when you'll come to see that the ostracism from the exhausting areas of the society can prove to be healthy.

  • @doomdoktor
    @doomdoktor 5 років тому +37

    Why am I watching this video when I don't have a reputation to begin with...🤔

  • @kentsalus
    @kentsalus 5 років тому +37

    you should've included something specific about slander and character assignation.

    • @manmanman4825
      @manmanman4825 5 років тому +7

      I'm going through that right now, would have loved something speciic about that as well.

    • @racerx5379
      @racerx5379 5 років тому +4

      Same here , jealous people are vicious ! Oddly enough, in my circles nobody likes the people doing the slandering. I'm getting excited over stuff I need to be cool about. Can't wait for the karma show !

    • @sarah18497
      @sarah18497 4 роки тому +3

      @@racerx5379 Karma is a made up, stupid concept.

    • @racerx5379
      @racerx5379 4 роки тому

      @@sarah18497 well Sarah if thats the way you feel then ....youre right of course.

  • @edemont333
    @edemont333 5 років тому +13

    Because of O.C.D. and anxiety problems, everybody thinks I'm a freak. There are people at work who walk by me like I'm not even there if I say hello to them. People I havn't seen in years, will say things like "I heard you went crazy"or they'll "look" at me in a certain way while they're talking to me. So, this is apparantly my new reputation.There was a time when making friends came so easy to me. I don't think I really appreciated it. I hope I come out the other side of this a better person. #mentalillnesssucks

    • @bink865
      @bink865 5 років тому +2

      Seek true friends

    • @wakeup6778
      @wakeup6778 4 роки тому +3

      Especially if you are a man. I deal with the same struggle. Hope you will find your way.

  • @mustafakandan2103
    @mustafakandan2103 4 роки тому +2

    This is a very relevant topic these days, when all around us prominent people are loosing their reputation & careers for alleged sexual misconduct.

  • @RODsDIY
    @RODsDIY 5 років тому +3

    I can't be more proud of not having any reputation. I managed to get rid of all those unworthy around me.

    • @_TheDarkHalf
      @_TheDarkHalf Рік тому

      you have no understanding of this life. you do have a reputation. even those you deem worthy deem YOU worthy for certain reason bro. even if your the butt of every joke. THATS your reputation. wether you like it or not.

  • @IntelligentInsights876
    @IntelligentInsights876 3 роки тому +1

    People been lying on me for years now, just keep moving that's my way.

  • @UnknownPerson-ch2uk
    @UnknownPerson-ch2uk 5 років тому +4

    Gotta say, it's nice to not care about reputation. It is awful, however, when someone you know who said they loved you suddenly turns and makes intentional steps to sabotage your reputation... It's not so much that I care to be popular... It would just be nice to be at peace knowing that I can mind my own business and not be bothered.

  • @jmannii
    @jmannii 5 років тому +4

    Most people in the world believe that God exists. For those of us who trust in God, we can overcome a bad reputation by asking forgiveness, trusting him to help, and feeling his support. He will show us exactly what to do to fix a reputation

    • @wakeup6778
      @wakeup6778 4 роки тому

      Even if you seek attention in order to rebuild your reputation?

  • @LLLadySSS
    @LLLadySSS 5 років тому +42

    *_A practical guide for James Charles._*

    • @18pristine
      @18pristine 5 років тому +3

      And Jaclyn Hill

    • @UlasMT
      @UlasMT 5 років тому +1

      He's already back on top boo. X

    • @camillebelcon8811
      @camillebelcon8811 5 років тому

      And Jaclyn Hill

    • @LLLadySSS
      @LLLadySSS 5 років тому +8

      MUT hEs AlReAdY bAcK oN tOp BoO 🤪
      🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄

    • @fatuusdottore
      @fatuusdottore 5 років тому

      Lady.Whatever Lmao.

  • @charmedprince
    @charmedprince 5 років тому +4

    WTF! at the moment I am being sued for libel (after defaming someone on facebook, in support of another person). And despite being a revered and good member of my community, I feel like such a pariah right now when my case went public. I'm still waiting for my court date (for amicable settlement) but still, i feel like a nobody. I want to hide from everyone else. Thank God the internet exists because it's my refuge right now. This video could not be more on time

    • @Milestonemonger
      @Milestonemonger 5 років тому +1

      This is why I don't have FB. It's nothing but trouble.

    • @leighrowly1692
      @leighrowly1692 3 роки тому +1

      What ended up happening? I’m in a similar place

    • @_TheDarkHalf
      @_TheDarkHalf Рік тому

      GOOD DONT TALK SHIT. ITS PEOPLE LIKE YOU THAT CHIME IN AND RUIN PEOPLE OVER NIGHT. LEAVE IT. I HOPE YOU GOT SUED TO THE MOON AND BACK. I WAS RUINED FOR NOT JUST THE PERSON THAT MADE A SOCIAL MEDIA LIES BUT THE SPREADERS OF THE LIE. THE SHEEP. YOU. AND YOU COMPLAIN??????!!!!!!

  • @simetry6477
    @simetry6477 5 років тому +17

    So if you qre considered disreputable, are we only given a chance to associate with other disreputable people? This seems nutty. One must reachnout to those who can forgive. The real way to regain self respect and a positive self image.

    • @supergamer1123
      @supergamer1123 5 років тому +4

      there's a bit of poetic license that the author of these videos takes when creating succinct scripts. they don't literally mean that you should only talk to disreputable people, the point is that we should rethink our notion of reputation when acting outwardly and making friends. most people wouldn't be friends with ex convicts - but this video asks the listener to challenge that notion, and with good reason.

  • @lillianedwards11
    @lillianedwards11 15 днів тому +1

    I lost a parent to suicide and this has ruined my reputation.
    I was unaware of stigmas and too traumatised to act in appropriate ways or realise I should hide the situation. 💔

  • @fubytv731
    @fubytv731 5 років тому +4

    The School of Life, please make a video about financial conflicts in a relationship.

  • @amandab3946
    @amandab3946 5 років тому +43

    Quick version:
    Hire Taylor Swift’s marketing team.

  • @badadviceforfree
    @badadviceforfree 3 місяці тому

    It was 5 years ago for me, one lie destroyed me at the peak of my career, which i also loved. i still struggle with getting emotionally invested in anything or anyone. I do the things. But i cant summon the naivete that seems to be necessary to feel hope.

  • @lerolerolerolerolero256
    @lerolerolerolerolero256 5 років тому +48

    Well I'm not afraid of losing my reputation cos I never even had one in the first place😏

    • @game_theory2547
      @game_theory2547 5 років тому +11

      The reputation for pineapples on pizza is very controversial depending on who you ask

    • @imonymous
      @imonymous 5 років тому +6

      You could still gain a bad reputation. And I don't mean "bad" in a cool way.

    • @libertario1277
      @libertario1277 5 років тому +4

      Yeah bad reputation is very easy to win, Even more in times of social media

    • @OmniValor
      @OmniValor 5 років тому +1

      But I love you pineapple pizza lol

    • @_TheDarkHalf
      @_TheDarkHalf Рік тому

      ok Joan Jett. everybody has one. you're missing the point. a reputation is neither good nor bad its either or. its also social currency so good luck laying on the couch all day.

  • @suzanneadamson1306
    @suzanneadamson1306 5 років тому

    Sincerity & vulnerability...Yes...

  • @TheyCallMeNewb
    @TheyCallMeNewb 5 років тому +1

    Too long since we had a melody with our andragogy! Fantastic! Oh it's the teaching and instruction of adult learners.

  • @jopetnavea456
    @jopetnavea456 5 років тому +5

    Answer starts at 7:00

  • @imefonudofot3021
    @imefonudofot3021 5 років тому +2

    This is oddly comforting

  • @joeygenes
    @joeygenes 5 років тому +1

    This video made me *ring the bell.* This would help me greatly in healing our clientele-- Persons Deprived of Liberty.

    • @_TheDarkHalf
      @_TheDarkHalf Рік тому

      how is this helpful? make friends with convicts and dogs? the only hope for loss of reputation is to wait on a miracle

  • @Alejo_755
    @Alejo_755 5 років тому +5

    Screw reputation. Subjectivity at its finest.

  • @africanflower2430
    @africanflower2430 2 роки тому +2

    This was so enlightening

  • @tau3481
    @tau3481 Рік тому +3

    I am going to deliberately plan my downfall/ loss of reputation😭, trying to release shame and be mentally free😻✵

  • @upaiaq
    @upaiaq 5 років тому +1

    I suffered a loss of reputation at work.I had a bully for a boss,I work for a municipality with civil service rules.Bully boss didn't abide by any of the rules for promotion or training or anything else, he went by cronyism and abuse of power.If you went along with his crooked and cruel bs you moved up.If you stood up for yourself or those being singled out and bullied you were chastised and smeared.I took issue with him bullying a coworker who had a stroke and walked with a cane and a limp the boss would mock him when he left the room and I told him it wasn't cool,I also helped a female coworker file a complaint with the EEOC for getting paid much less than a male coworker. I was given the shit work, and isolated from my coworkers by being put on 3 rotations of nightshift in a row the whole time I was on night shift I was being smeared and talked down by boss to other employees.One of his cronies made up a story that I had made a threat of violence to him about bully boss.I did not.I was fired but got my job back as the Civil Service Commission did not believe the lie.However the damage was done,I dont think I will ever get my reputation back.For me,as a person who tries to live by the tenets of Buddhism, one of the hard parts is being accused of making a threat of violence.Just BS . I make good money and probably wont quit,but I have to find a new perspective to survive.Even with all that retaliation I would still standup for myself and those being bullied.It just sux and I wish it didn't have to be this way.Thanks for the rant,

    • @Onlinesully
      @Onlinesully 4 роки тому

      upaiaq
      Well done for handling it

  • @golluverma1366
    @golluverma1366 5 років тому +1

    after all gone 1-acceptance2-hope3new failure freinds like us4-try again 5-stay away from overthinking cause it's my life no one can stop me from enjoying my life .and wear a cloak of sarcasm and no one can stop you.

  • @kirtipandey2468
    @kirtipandey2468 7 місяців тому

    I'm married 25 years and from day 1 my inlaws ruined my image and reputation in society. My MIL is a narcist and ring leader. I lived in pain, fear and embarrassment. People would mock me, humiliate me n there was nothing I could do. My husband defended me but his mother n brother never stopped. We lost all our family and friends n we have been lonely 25 years. But all we had was each other. One act of jealousy n envy can ruin once life and can cause so much of pain n suffering. I hope once day the repent for their sin and realise.

  • @Milestonemonger
    @Milestonemonger 5 років тому +1

    Notice how the footage is from the good-ld-days before social media took a huge chunk of our character.

  • @yhave24hours13
    @yhave24hours13 5 років тому +29

    My life is a loss of reputation
    Every time I think I'm good I embarrass myself either through behaviour or life choices
    So no I ain't watching the video

    • @yhave24hours13
      @yhave24hours13 5 років тому +3

      @989Bigboss I just don't think it will , because their videos are usually directed at a specific group of people

    • @dandrechesterfield5411
      @dandrechesterfield5411 4 роки тому +3

      The whole point of the video is to help people who feel their bad reputation. If you have a bad reputation than this video is directly for you and the rest of us.

  • @ДжейШмидт
    @ДжейШмидт 2 роки тому +2

    Even if your reputation is only seen by 100 people, most people are uneducated so they can only see rumors and not fact.
    Also, make sure people don't follow you around pretending to be outsiders for the amusement of the ones who ruined your reputation to begin with

  • @TheKfeliciano2
    @TheKfeliciano2 5 років тому +6

    This is very insightful. Thank you.

  • @nobaso620
    @nobaso620 5 років тому

    Never needed anything other than this.

  • @jmannii
    @jmannii 5 років тому +2

    read a book by Max Lucado called you are special. It's about a little girl who lives without a reputation.

  • @keithacord3957
    @keithacord3957 Рік тому +1

    That’s Darrin Stephens on Bewitched

  • @dollfins1842
    @dollfins1842 2 роки тому +1

    This is the definition of high school or middle

  • @rishikachaudhary512
    @rishikachaudhary512 5 років тому +2

    Make an album about it. There would be no explanation, only reputation.

  • @GracieAckerman
    @GracieAckerman 3 місяці тому

    No reputation can be ruined by slandering

  • @duckmansam5046
    @duckmansam5046 5 років тому +2

    If you really fucked up. Change your appearance, accent, name and start over. There; helped you.

  • @jenh9426
    @jenh9426 5 років тому

    someone send this to sarah sanders... she's going to need it..

  • @WashingtonDC20032
    @WashingtonDC20032 3 роки тому +1

    "I have a HORRIBLE reputation and not a single fuck to give." ~Eugene Murphy

  • @teemum.9023
    @teemum.9023 5 років тому

    I agree with commenters, it is not your culture, if it offers only coercion. You make your own culture by living in it.

  • @kristinmeyer489
    @kristinmeyer489 Рік тому +1

    You can get your reputation impugned and deliberately destroyed by liars if you're a woman, or a targeted individual. If you're unfortunate enough to be both, and come from a narcissistic family system where you never got genuine love and support, you're doomed. The world is not just cruel. It is evil.

    • @kristinmeyer489
      @kristinmeyer489 2 місяці тому

      @Rh-bk8pu Forgiveness for the unforgivable is impossible. When God himself reaches out and provides me the justice I am long overdue for a lifetime of crimes against me, and I actually see the judtice, then I will exhale. There is no forgiveness for the unforgivable and for the deliberately sadistically manipulative wicked. Keep you thousands of years OF LIES, otherwise.