I’VE HIT ROCK BOTTOM. ALCOHOL HAS DESTROYED MY LIFE

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  • Опубліковано 11 жов 2024
  • I’ve been a super heavy drinker since my teens. I’ve almost lost my job, I’ve lost my fiancée, and I’m going to college full time and support my two kids as a single dad. Enough is TOO MUCH! It’s time to stop the booze for good! Join me in a journey to sobriety!

КОМЕНТАРІ • 464

  • @DonnDenisse
    @DonnDenisse 6 місяців тому +75

    Alcohol and cigarettes addiction actually destroyed my life. I could remember several years ago after divorce with my wife which brought me into my disastrous journey on Alcohol and cigarettes. I suffered severe depression and mental disorder. Got diagnosed with cptsd. Not until a friend recommended me to psilocybin mushrooms treatment. Psilocybin treatment saved my life honestly. 8 years totally clean. Much respect to mother nature the great magic shrooms.

    • @Caroljoyce-mp8sk
      @Caroljoyce-mp8sk 6 місяців тому

      YES very sure of Dr.benfungi. I have the same experience with anxiety, depression, PTSD and addiction and Mushrooms definitely made a huge huge difference to why am clean today.

    • @RodriguezGorge
      @RodriguezGorge 6 місяців тому

      I always admire those who beat their addiction. Knowing it's possible to fix your life knowing there's people out there that have done what I thought was impossible gives me hope I will make it through as well. Those who share their experiences don't know how much it helps when you're about to give up, it gives you the strength knowing somone who actully know what it's like to go through this tell you it's possible, it's not the same somone telling you you can do it when they have no idea what it's like, but hearing somone who knows what it's like that helps a lot since you understand it firsthand and made it out gives so much hope. so thanks for sharing.

    • @Jacksonstatham-tf8ov
      @Jacksonstatham-tf8ov 6 місяців тому

      How do I reach out to him? Is he on insta

    • @JesseJason-qc7ug
      @JesseJason-qc7ug 6 місяців тому

      Yes he's Dr.benfungi.Shrooms to me is a natrual healer. I know a guy who has used mushrooms in the same way and they have really helped him. mah dudes have safe trips all.

    • @AnnaRoth-pb8xv
      @AnnaRoth-pb8xv 6 місяців тому

      I wish they were readily available in my place. Microdosing was my next plan of care for my husband. He is 59 & has so many mental health issues plus probable CTE & a TBI that left him in a coma 8 days. It's too late now I had to get a TPO as he's 6'6 300+ pound homicidal maniac. He's constantly talking about killing someone. He's violent. Anyone reading this Familiar w/ BPD know if it is common for an obsession with violence.

  • @RinoSchiavoCampo
    @RinoSchiavoCampo 7 місяців тому +178

    4 months and no follow up. It's OK if you slipped. If you are breathing, it's not too late.

    • @megacatsupreme466
      @megacatsupreme466 6 місяців тому +2

      🙏🏻

    • @jimridge2503
      @jimridge2503 6 місяців тому +3

      Thankyou for sharing your story...
      I mirror many things about you.
      You look and sound very exhausted from your lifestyle.
      Instead of doing things that make us feel better, we take a short cut and drink again to do this. unfortunately drinking doesn't make us feel better anymore short term or long term . Good on you from trying to overcome your poison, instead of giving up on life.

    • @blue2043
      @blue2043 6 місяців тому +3

      God bless you in your journey back❤

    • @crc143
      @crc143 Місяць тому +1

      Good job man! I watched this on my 22nd day of no drinking. I told myself no more drinks when I turned 40 so here we go! I hope you are holding strong! WE can do this!!

  • @marceloptasznik4433
    @marceloptasznik4433 10 місяців тому +11

    Be strong!!! You can do it. I was drinking heavily for decades and ,like you, I finally decided that it was enough.
    There is life beyond alcohol.

  • @grahamherbert3612
    @grahamherbert3612 3 місяці тому +29

    I had twenty one clinical detoxes, six visits to psychiatric hospitals, twelve arrests, two divorces, and lost nine jobs. My drinking was punctuated with people in uniform. Police, Nurses, Security Staff, and even members of the Fire Service. I've recently celebrated fourteen years sobriety, working a program of Rational Recovery.

  • @CSSkoolieProject
    @CSSkoolieProject 7 місяців тому +25

    Brother I drank a case of beer minimum per day for many years. I've been drinking since i was 12. Alcohol almost ended me. I've been clean three and a half years now... Not a drop...You can do this. If you need any tips/help or just someone to chat with... Hit me up. You got this.

  • @mysteriousdisappearance
    @mysteriousdisappearance 6 місяців тому +10

    18 months sober. Had some slip ups but its so worth it. Recovery isnt always a straight path, but you can do it.
    I hope youre doing well man.

  • @RichardWherry
    @RichardWherry Місяць тому +9

    Pulling for you, man - I've been on my own journey last couple years and it's totally worth it. One foot in front of the other!

  • @JoeAndrewHouston
    @JoeAndrewHouston 7 місяців тому +8

    12 weeks for me. Never looking back. Admire your honesty. It’s videos like yours that keep us strong. Hope you’re doing well.

  • @ratso4443
    @ratso4443 6 місяців тому +12

    My alcoholism has a lot to do with social anxiety. Once I got sober I realized I don’t have to do anything I don’t really want to do. Now I spend my time doing what feeds my spirit. And I asked Jesus Christ to forgive me, which is key. God bless you brother.

  • @Louis-3RD
    @Louis-3RD Місяць тому +10

    There really is no room in today's society for any kind of addiction. I quit alcohol and drugs. I recently quit refined addictive sugars. Let's all try to heal.

  • @guryurfur528
    @guryurfur528 8 місяців тому +5

    You got this man! Always good to better your life. Proud of you recognizing the issues and making the changes. Wishing you an amazing future!

  • @SolidityDegen
    @SolidityDegen 6 місяців тому +7

    Hey brother, we’ve been there man. We all slip, you can do this, if you’re drunk af right now, it doesn’t matter. You can do this.

  • @giatasha2181
    @giatasha2181 6 місяців тому +9

    Just subscribed even if you have relapsed that’s ok all you need to do is stop. If you haven’t relapsed then nice one. Hope there is an update too - I am sure you are an amazing father and hard worker. It’s a lot. 12 weeks sober. I spent first two weeks watching videos of people dying of alcohol liver disease. I don’t want that. I watch every Friday afternoon and it gets me through the weekend. I don’t want to die in that way.

  • @paulinepickering8151
    @paulinepickering8151 6 місяців тому +10

    My husband is 7 years sober
    No one loved a drink more than him
    Very proud of him ❤

  • @patrickbarry8374
    @patrickbarry8374 6 місяців тому +5

    Be strong. Tough road ahead, but highly worth it! It gets easier over the many battles you will face mentally in the beginning of your journey; just don't succumb. I am your age, and have got nearly 13 months sober now. I am never going back. It takes way more than it gives. I wish you strength dude!

  • @royalsaint117
    @royalsaint117 5 місяців тому +7

    I've hit my rock bottom, once I realized the scope of the damage I've done hurting someone I loved deeply that when I decided enough was enough.
    I was full of guilt, anger, fear, and loathing spiraling in depression.
    Then I switched gears and used all that negative energy and channeled it into fuel for discipline, motivation, drive, ambition, determination to beat my addiction.
    Got into fitness, dieting, focused on my financials and my career.
    Path to sobriety is long and the road to redemption is even longer and not guaranteed, but set goals and move in silence. All wounds will heal in due time but until then set goals and don't lose focus.

  • @baldersn4474
    @baldersn4474 7 місяців тому +8

    Week 5 for me , 35 plus years of binge drinking, weekends, vacations, holidays etc, few months off here and there , but determined to stay off the hamster wheel this time .I'm 52 now

  • @nextlevelsuki
    @nextlevelsuki 6 місяців тому +5

    Hi! Just found your channel today. I'm hope you're still doing well on your journey🙏🏽 I'm currently on Day 81 no alcohol after 27 years of moderate to heavy drinking. I've also been on a health journey as well! Feeling great!

  • @stephanieanderson9195
    @stephanieanderson9195 6 місяців тому +3

    6 years for me ...living my best life !!❤❤❤❤ you got this !!! Stay strong, hug your kids . Much love brother!❤❤❤

  • @robertbordevik5072
    @robertbordevik5072 6 місяців тому +7

    Your silence speaks volumes dude. Hope you’re okey 🙏 My rock bottom was finding out that there are more levels down after what I thought was THE rock bottom. So when I hit the 7th or eight level beneath what I thought was rock bottom, well… it’s not looking good to put it that way. I think I past through hell years ago. Now I’m in another realm where even the devil goes: I ain’t goin in there.. But there’s always hope and there is always a way out. Well at least that’s what they say. I’ve been sober for a week. I can go 3 months without easily. Then this idiotic idea comes, maybe I can just have some wine with the food, or I watch a movie where a guy at his office pours himself some whiskey, and I think: hmm, I can do that too, no problem! and then.. hello rock bottom.

  • @Declangarlandacoustic
    @Declangarlandacoustic 7 місяців тому +7

    It will get easier bro hang in there one of the best things i ever did 621 days sober today never been happier ❤

    • @trevvy2thumbs
      @trevvy2thumbs 7 місяців тому +1

      We have the same sobriety date!

    • @Stay_Loose407
      @Stay_Loose407 7 місяців тому

      Okay congrats but if I had 621 days I wouldn't be watching drinking videos. You must be one of those pedal pushers from Aa

  • @lelandholiday1761
    @lelandholiday1761 Місяць тому +6

    I'm 6 years sober now. I Binge drank for 6 years straight after my divorce. Had 4 Dui's. I totally understand what you're going through. Stay strong bro.

  • @buddyjones6429
    @buddyjones6429 5 місяців тому +8

    Everyones rock bottom is different.
    Mine was in January.
    Had abdominal pains, waited almost a month to go to a walk in clinic. They did tests, called me in and told me to goto the emergency room NOW. They did tests and told me to see a GI doctor ASAP. They told me my liver was shutting down.
    As of now, looks like I may have dodged a bullet. Liver is functioning but still compromised. I'm at 3 months and have zero desire for alcohol.
    Had I kept going they said I'd need to get on a transplant list.

  • @CancelledShow
    @CancelledShow 6 місяців тому +5

    stay strong man, your family will be your best motivation

  • @lydiamills2045
    @lydiamills2045 6 місяців тому +7

    Give an update man. I completely understand how u feel. I'm really struggling myself. Your videos are helpful x

  • @tjs1189
    @tjs1189 6 місяців тому +5

    Took me at LEAST 10 attempts for it to stick, and this still isn’t a sure thing. But I’m the best I’ve ever been. There’s a huge community that is routing for you because there’s so many of us that have dealt with (are dealing with) the same shit.

  • @czanderrr
    @czanderrr 6 місяців тому +7

    I got sober right around the time of this video coming out. I hope you're alright man.

  • @ianjones1708
    @ianjones1708 6 місяців тому +5

    i rarely comment but some of the things i’ve seen you guys say are absolutely fowl. addiction is something i wouldn’t wish on my worse enemy. the hateful and rude comments can be kept for yourself. addicts are vulnerable and for him to admit he has a problem is a huge big step. don’t knock someone when they are down. we’re all humans and deserve love/support. maybe he doesn’t have people in his life to open up to like he has in this video, came here for supper and understanding!
    (you haven’t posted in 5 months but i hope you’re doing good and focused on recovery.)

    • @Jay-zx5hx
      @Jay-zx5hx 6 місяців тому

      They have nothing going on in their lives, so they kick people while they're down.

  • @gabriel1095
    @gabriel1095 7 місяців тому +8

    Hey brother 15 months alcohol free for me today. You got this. ❤ I’m 39

  • @klassicfamily2085
    @klassicfamily2085 7 місяців тому +3

    Bless you man!!
    Praying for you🙏🏾
    I’m right with you!
    Trust God

  • @glitchessence
    @glitchessence 6 місяців тому +5

    I’ve been sober for one month (was drinking daily and heavily for 25 years). My life has changed completely. My mind and body are healthy and I’m thriving. You can do this buddy. I’m sending you strength and brevity.

  • @tomharrison11
    @tomharrison11 6 місяців тому +3

    Stay strong brother. I am going through a similar situation at the moment. Give her the space as hard as it is and let go. Work on yourself.

  • @belle6643
    @belle6643 6 місяців тому +7

    You can do it, the only way is up! I'm 3 years and 3 months sober.

  • @ezmn9663
    @ezmn9663 7 місяців тому +9

    Crazy cycle, drink to forget, and wake up slightly worse...I am trying to get out of tht cycle...

    • @johnhewlett525
      @johnhewlett525 6 місяців тому +2

      I binge drunk for years and ended up with DTs and had to be detoxed in hospital..4 and a half years I'm sober .keep going

  • @jorgepulidovaladez9418
    @jorgepulidovaladez9418 6 місяців тому +4

    3 months sober. Videos like yours help with my journey, it does seem to get easier after month about a month and half. Only thing I’m worried about is falling to peer pressure at a family event or party ( my family is a big drinking family ) but so far I been good..

  • @sarahscott2496
    @sarahscott2496 6 місяців тому +4

    I have never heard someone so clear and ready to be on with their new life. Looking forward to your next video.

    • @km3710
      @km3710 6 місяців тому +2

      same. This is the most incredible video I have seen on AUD (alcohlol use disorder) alcholism that I have seen Honest as hell.

  • @jasonwerline
    @jasonwerline 6 місяців тому +3

    I’m rooting for you sir! Personally I’ve cut back significantly on my drinking. I plan on restricting myself even more in the coming months. Take care and hopefully see you soon!

  • @KwertyKeys
    @KwertyKeys 6 місяців тому +6

    Saying that, admitting that, that you’ve hit rock bottom, is step one in the right direction. One day at a time, pal. Come back, regular videos will gather a positive community here for you, a bit of support. Wishing you well ❤ Your documented rise from the depths of despair, to good health and good fitness, alcohol free, could even become a new online career. A very motivating story behind hard won climb to success is always a positive good thing. ❤

  • @GilbertsLab
    @GilbertsLab 6 місяців тому +3

    79 days for me since my last drink. Hope you are well. Take it one day at a time. Subscribed and hope to see an update when you're ready.

  • @crystalwilliams1841
    @crystalwilliams1841 6 місяців тому +9

    Alcohol is the worst poison you can put in your body let alone bring into your family good luck friend.

  • @wdkaye
    @wdkaye 6 місяців тому +2

    The algos graced me with this video, it is so real and raw. I get you man. You’re still young, you can improve your situation, always. Keep at it, and share again when you’re ready!
    Also as a another former touring musician, man, every club and every bar is comping free drinks. You could be forgiven for getting swept up in the booze lifestyle. But, that was a long time ago. Our lives are different now and we need to be present for every moment of it.

  • @MetalMaiden4585CFH
    @MetalMaiden4585CFH 6 місяців тому +6

    I relapsed after 2 years. Stayed sober then relapsed again. I still beat myself up for it. But at one point you realize its not worth the pain. Its not worth the suffering. I still get tempted, but I think about the crap I went through to get sober. Its not worth it in the end. A cheap buzz is not worth losing you're life over.

    • @electrikevin
      @electrikevin 6 місяців тому +4

      relapsed last month after 2 years as well. It took 2 seconds, lasted for a month and a half. Good luck sister

  • @danielbermudez7802
    @danielbermudez7802 6 місяців тому +3

    Dan from Texas here , man . Would really be cool to see an update. I hit mine about 8 months ago myself. Life is a swift kick in the nuts but the common denominator in it all for me was that if I continued with alcohol, my life will slowly and surely fall apart ; and it went there. Even if you slipped , let us know how your journey has been so far. Best Regards

  • @user-bj8ky4jt3r
    @user-bj8ky4jt3r 6 місяців тому +3

    Good luck on your recovering journey. Mine began some 13 years ago at the age of 19.

  • @POPCULTRONIC
    @POPCULTRONIC 6 місяців тому +2

    All the best, man. You can do it. What you’re saying in the bedrock of a happy and healthy life.

  • @nicholashuwe6501
    @nicholashuwe6501 7 місяців тому +3

    I think you are in place now where you hate drinking and that’s a good thing. Onward and upward. Stay strong 💪

  • @EnoughInternet4Today
    @EnoughInternet4Today 6 місяців тому +3

    Hitting 5 years off of that shit this year. Only 28. You guys got this ❤

  • @jdmathys1
    @jdmathys1 6 місяців тому +3

    I hope you are sticking to your plan. Update or talk to someone you can trust if videos aren't the right answer for your progress. Best of luck!

  • @Tracy-ks1vk
    @Tracy-ks1vk 6 місяців тому +5

    This popped up in my feed today. I decided to watch and I appreciate your story and honesty. Recovery is possible! 4.5 years no booze. Please give us an update ❤️‍🩹☀️

  • @endlesszero6
    @endlesszero6 6 місяців тому +2

    Hey man. Currently 3 months sober, going on 4. I hope you're doing well and staying sober. I believe in you man, I know you can stay sober.

  • @Catlady12341
    @Catlady12341 6 місяців тому +4

    Are you still sober? I did almost a year then thought because my birthday is on Christmas I could have a day…. Went beyond a day. I feel horrible about myself…. I hope you’re still sober 🤞

  • @thomasorchard
    @thomasorchard 6 місяців тому +8

    The average is 7 relapses before finally quitting. Hope you get the help you need.

  • @hbrotha1866
    @hbrotha1866 Місяць тому +4

    Felt like dying last week it’s been 6 days since my bender. I got the results back from my doctor and she told me my kidney function has gone down. I’m only 30 years old but now starting to see what this drug really is, which is poison ☠️. Health is more important than temporary pleasure. Good luck to everyone

  • @chasedecottignies8444
    @chasedecottignies8444 3 місяці тому +12

    Hope you are doing okay 8 months later. Realistically you arent. Youre probably deep in alcoholism again. Thats okay. I have been there many times. Im 38 days sober right now, i think i wont be back but we never know. You gotta keep trying and pick sobriety back up as soon as you can. Go to a meeting please. You can find AA, NA, aa alternatives online through zoom and in your town. Fellowship has helped me

    • @zachariahsilvestri3215
      @zachariahsilvestri3215 Місяць тому +2

      The second he said and this as someone in recovery has helped me so much truly. The second he said a year and not day 16 I was like oh this gonna go backwards. Too many goals at once. It’s literally a day at a time. As you said if he did slip that’s fine I’ve slipped I’m sure you’ve slipped but you get right back on.

    • @chasedecottignies8444
      @chasedecottignies8444 Місяць тому +1

      @@zachariahsilvestri3215 yep exactly! I day at a time, meetings, and fellowship with other sober recovering people has me at 80 days tomorrow and I'm so happy to not be drinking. Hope you are well

    • @zachariahsilvestri3215
      @zachariahsilvestri3215 Місяць тому

      @@chasedecottignies8444 good stuff man keep it up yup I’m going on 65 as of today we got this dude.

    • @zachariahsilvestri3215
      @zachariahsilvestri3215 Місяць тому

      @@chasedecottignies8444 congrats on 80 days man 🎉

  • @jaredtestermantesterman899
    @jaredtestermantesterman899 7 місяців тому +4

    The thing about ptsd is it don't effect u till the wars over man. Totally caught off guard. Were everything hits u all at oncce . I took a nose dive and i thought. This shit hard core man.

  • @ShadesOClarity
    @ShadesOClarity 6 місяців тому +5

    I recently started a recovery channel. I also just got out of yet another alcohol detox. Let's kick this thing's ass, man!

  • @archangel_josh
    @archangel_josh 6 місяців тому +5

    I got sober a few days after my 39th birthday. It stopped being fun years ago and had been problematic for years. I also never got that beer buzz in the end...I used to have 2 beers and be all like "Yeah! Woo! This is fun! Let's go and do something." It got to the point where I'd just sit there drinking, getting drunk and I had no euphoria. No buzz at all, no fun feelings at all. Currently a year and a half sober TODAY. 548 days.

    • @martlowe913
      @martlowe913 6 місяців тому

      Congratulations well done.

  • @Bigtooth-Forest
    @Bigtooth-Forest 7 місяців тому +5

    I drank for 20 years, sobered up a year ago at 39, never been happier.

  • @falco1186
    @falco1186 6 місяців тому +2

    Hey Dude,
    just saw this video.
    I hope that you are 5 month sober now, if Not it’s okay too. Getting sober is a marathon and not a sprint. I was struggling just like you an i‘m 4 month sober now.
    Keep fighting man.
    Lots of wishes from germany 🤘🏻
    Oh an by the way, you are a good dad!

  • @captainveils9693
    @captainveils9693 6 місяців тому +2

    Legend bro!! I also quit , 60 days and never felt better in my entire life. Every aspect of my life is better. Give us an update and if you started again, you can always stop!

  • @jstanley8545
    @jstanley8545 6 місяців тому +4

    Six months sober. The more time away from drinking, the easier it gets, at least for me, and for now. I hope you are able to read these comments and know that you have support.

  • @donny163
    @donny163 6 місяців тому +5

    Good luck friend, the longer you abstein the more you'll start enjoying things, once upon a time drinking was all I enjoyed, everything was around drink. Now it doesn't bother me, the same will happen to you, stick with it it's a demon, best thing I ever done, drinking is a fools game - Don-England

  • @QsynYo
    @QsynYo Місяць тому +5

    We want to hear from you! It's ok if you had a lapse. Please do not give up!

  • @tomshourd2601
    @tomshourd2601 7 місяців тому +3

    Hang in there buddy, I'm in a similar situation and I'm tired of it too

  • @jasondesjardins7371
    @jasondesjardins7371 3 місяці тому +3

    Very brave of you to share this. Keep going brother. Never give up.

  • @Thatdudefresh
    @Thatdudefresh 6 місяців тому +6

    I just hit 5 months today.....it took my eyes turning yellow and being told if I have 1 more drink I was gonna die....don't be me! Stop and stick to it

  • @visceralgrima4378
    @visceralgrima4378 6 місяців тому +6

    I was hoping for an update. Start over if you need to. You have a lot of support on YT.

  • @carolineallshorn291
    @carolineallshorn291 6 місяців тому +3

    I've known a lot of serious drinkers, a d saw more than a few buried....I acknowledge your bravery and appreciate your honesty....I must be hard. I just saw a podcast about a book called Alcohol Explained by William Porter, recommended highly...Good Luck ❤❤❤

  • @boogiemcsploogie
    @boogiemcsploogie 6 місяців тому +5

    Here for ya bro, hope you're doing well

  • @Viethalnumba1
    @Viethalnumba1 6 місяців тому +1

    It will get better. Never stop trying. We all have our battles. Sharing your story is not only beneficial for your psyche it can also help others. As a young person I appreciate your insights.

  • @patfaulkner1938
    @patfaulkner1938 6 місяців тому +3

    Bless you. You can do it. You’re never alone.

  • @jatinderdevgun9093
    @jatinderdevgun9093 Місяць тому +8

    Losing the love of your life qualifies for rock bottom to myself personally... Hang on in buddy...

    • @vixter28
      @vixter28 Місяць тому +1

      I wish my boyfriend would think like that 😢💔

    • @jatinderdevgun9093
      @jatinderdevgun9093 Місяць тому +1

      @@vixter28 Frankly...how low can you go from there?? I still have mine Thank God

  • @jdion79
    @jdion79 3 місяці тому +9

    The sugar cravings are brutal for me

  • @filthism1659
    @filthism1659 6 місяців тому +2

    Bro as long as you KEEP COMEINF BACK ZDOSNT MATTER IF U SLIP UP JUST ALWAYD KEEP COMING BACK

  • @Robe_Hernandez
    @Robe_Hernandez 6 місяців тому +3

    As a musician I can relate to this, its hard, alcohol is all around us. Ive been sober 3 months now, and its been the best 3 months in my life. My music carreer is doing so much better, when I was drinking Inwouldnt practice or recording was a hassle, now sober Inhave so much time and recording is so easy. I have energy to get a lot done.

  • @jasonparks6006
    @jasonparks6006 6 місяців тому +4

    Hey man, ive been drinking hard liquor since was 11 years old. Constantly by 21. Im 36 now, and im one day 1. Fux alcohol. Its cost me alot. 8 year relationship, i had 6 funerals to go to last year, including my father. I dont even remember last year. Ive been to detox 3 times, man. I woke up this morning and finally said fux this life. This is no life. Everything you said you were doing while on alcohol ive been through. 1.75 liters a day, everyday, for just over a year. I dont care how hard "the road ahead" is going to be. Im done. We need more videos from you man. You are not alone. Take care yourself, for yourself. I wish you the best.
    If you wallow around in shyt long enough, it stops smelling...Get out of it, however you can man. Use whatever options you can.

  • @evan2799
    @evan2799 6 місяців тому +3

    It’s a difficult approach that you’re making here, but it’s good that you’ve at least given yourself a little bit of time to see some clarity. A lot of people in my life have been able to quit and remain sober without support systems like therapists, group meetings, sober friends with the same goal, and so on. My story is similar to yours- quite uncanny actually. I started drinking at the same age, played in bands, got super rowdy, and so forth. I suppose I never did say that I “hit rock bottom,” but there did come a time where I realized that I was an alcoholic and it completely fucked up a lot of things in my life. I finally quit, and stayed sober for 9 months and 2 days after drinking every day for the better part of 25 years.
    Life hit me really hard and all at once after those 9 months of sobriety. I convinced myself that I could handle just one beer and a whiskey on a very lonely Christmas Eve in Seattle, listening to The Pogues and ducking into a bar as the snow fell. I’m a master of romanticizing things, justifying things, and convincing myself that I’m strong and determined. The second that the IPA touched my lips, I knew it was over. I had 2 more rounds, because fuck it. “Just this one night,” I said. I was back in full swing the next day, and for the following 4 months. Destroying more friendships, putting a nail in the coffin with my relationship, making a complete fool of myself, and waking up every single day with that deep sense of humiliation and regret. I’d just drink some more.
    I quit again after my 4 month binge. “I’m serious this time,” I told myself. I proclaimed it as I had the first time on social media for everyone to see, patting myself on the back for my vulnerability and “holding myself accountable.” The likes and supportive words came flooding in, as they always do. “You’ve got this!” “So proud of you!” The ego boosted and the dopamine rush was real. I entered the ‘pink-cloud’ phase again (a phenomanal feeling for those who aren’t familiar), which if I had to guess is how you felt when you posted your video. I posted about my determination and I finally was going to get sober “for real” to faces on a screen, most of whom I didn’t even know, and a handful of distant acquaintances. Most of them clicked “love” and “care” and left a few motivational words. They went about their lives, and so did I.
    My sobriety lasted about 5 months that time, until I went on a date with a really nice gal who ordered a glass of wine. “Yeah, I’ll have the same,” I said. It’s just that easy. It was once again over for me, binging again for the next 3 months, maybe more. I’ve relapsed 3 times now, and I never thought I would when I quit the first time. It has a hold on me, as it does with millions and millions of people. The addiction is always hiding in the background doing pushups and just waiting for you to cave and convince yourself that a drink or a drug will give you some relief, ease the pain, maybe even solve some things. You KNOW it won’t, but you do it anyway. And on, and on, and on. I commend those who are successful the first time attempting to get sober. It truly is amazing. I’d have almost 2 years under my belt right now if I’d stuck with it from the beginning.
    There’s no right way to do it, obviously. People who tell you otherwise just don’t understand. My approach, the white-knuckle approach, hasn’t worked for me. The feeling that I had when I boasted about my goals disappeared with time. I’m 5 days sober now, and I’m writing on here because it’s somewhat anonymous and a way for me to get some thoughts out. It’s always super disheartening when I have to turn back the sobriety clock, feeling like I’m starting all over again, but I know it’s better than the alternative. Some people say there’s no shame in relapsing, but there is. At least for me. I’m using that shame for some motivation this time around. I won’t be professing this on my social media, but I’ve shared it with couple very close and trusted friends. I’m gonna try to tackle this from another direction this time around by setting up some healthy support systems. I’m strong and self-determined, but obviously not enough to eradicate the temptation when life gets so hard and fucked up, which is an inevitability. For all of us.
    I wish you all the best, man. Please reach out if you’d ever like to chat.

    • @luck8118
      @luck8118 6 місяців тому +1

      Crazy story. Good luck,...

    • @benben5847
      @benben5847 Місяць тому

      @@luck8118No offence but I don’t think it’s a crazy story. Many people get on and fall off the wagon again and again including me.

  • @Beardedthoughts
    @Beardedthoughts 7 місяців тому +2

    Be strong I hope that you have made great progress! I have also started my journey! Keep posting! Would love to see how it's going!

  • @calcolson2813
    @calcolson2813 5 місяців тому +5

    As a recovering alcoholic. I recommend.Get right with God. That is the foundation of recovery. Don’t get me wrong there is no magic bullet. But thrusting in God is a big big part of staying sober.

  • @Chris-lz1fs
    @Chris-lz1fs 6 місяців тому +4

    I'm not going to tell you how long I'm sober simply because it doesn't matter. People can be years sober and still mad as a box of frogs! Length of time is no indication of quality of sobriety. All anybody in recovery has is today. Today is the only day that matters. And all you have to do for today is get through to bedtime without taking anything intoxicating. That's all. All the best.

  • @nicolesgray
    @nicolesgray 7 місяців тому +1

    Hi. I grew up without alcohol. In college, I was bullied for not 'being able to hold my liquor.' I prayed to the heavens to have the body that could drink. I couldn't Felt rejected and started hating on people who drank. Never understanding the nature of the addiction. I also saw that often those people affected by alcohol use disorder are very sensitive and creative underneath when not drinking. Regardless, I support you 100%. I believe that you will win. You are a whole human being. And you will get your love back. And you will have a family. You have time. Everyone is rooting for you. Words have power, and I speak words of positivity to you.

  • @Graceandres3
    @Graceandres3 7 місяців тому +4

    I saw this was recorded 4 months ago. I hope you are seeing better days.

  • @nonbeliever3745
    @nonbeliever3745 7 місяців тому +4

    I hope you’re doing ok sir. After the setback - the comeback!

  • @MsSheilaC
    @MsSheilaC 6 місяців тому +3

    I hope yr ok! Thank you for this video
    We’d love an update no matter what yr path has been. We all can relate or we wouldnt be here listening 🙏🏻 Day 24 for me.

  • @DCRACKA
    @DCRACKA 6 місяців тому +1

    I realized I was physically dependent on alcohol so I reached out for help n sought treatment...9 1/2 months now sober...you can quit, you just gotta want it! Wish you the best man!

  • @butternut8882
    @butternut8882 7 місяців тому +2

    First step is admiting ,13 months sober here ,never realized how toxic alcohol is until I got sober, my health an relationships has improved 1000 percent ,that's what keeps me going ,I will never have another drink as long as I live for one I don't want it an two I know I can't, there's no such thing as one drink with dinner good luck man, most of all what has helped me is prayer an faith turn your troubles to the lord an he will help you threw

  • @annasisk9861
    @annasisk9861 Місяць тому +2

    Good on you. big hug from Ireland, Anna.

  • @JeanineBenford-ug6lz
    @JeanineBenford-ug6lz 4 місяці тому +1

    Please keep taking the positive path you are soooo worth it, love yourself and most of all respect yourself ,and others will too. I wish you all the best of life.

  • @mrthomas394
    @mrthomas394 7 місяців тому +8

    I make small gains like going 2/3 weeks without a drink then relapse and drink 15 cans over a weekend with a few vodkas. Monday comes along and I feel like shit and very guilty for drinking which spurs me on to do another 3 weeks of not drinking.... It's a cycle a cannot break.... On a plus side though I don't drink enough to get drunk anymore..... I really suffered from my last hangover I mean I was nearly crying 😂 never again

    • @sadhu7191
      @sadhu7191 7 місяців тому

      U have 1000s of drugs to chose from. Could try kratom, cannabis, doxylamine or dxm freebase. All easier on body

    • @sadhu7191
      @sadhu7191 7 місяців тому

      Every sat I take edibles, kratom 15 grams , doxylamine 200 mg and dxm freebase 180 mg. Nod put like heroin busted.

    • @sadhu7191
      @sadhu7191 7 місяців тому

      I quit nicotine and caffeine.

    • @sadhu7191
      @sadhu7191 7 місяців тому

      All my drugs help chronic pain and make me nicer. U take cannabis all day er day grow it. Kratom once at night every day. Dxm freebase and doxylamine only on sat

  • @Robe_Hernandez
    @Robe_Hernandez 6 місяців тому +4

    Dont think about what youre missing out, but what you are gaining.

  • @Kasandrajoy82
    @Kasandrajoy82 6 місяців тому +3

    I see this was five months ago. I hope you’re doing well. You should continue to upload videos because I feel that it’s probably very therapeutic.

  • @yoandermulet3731
    @yoandermulet3731 7 місяців тому +4

    Keep going pal 👍.. you can do it .. anyone can do it .. come on !! Quit because you want to do it.. not for anyone else.. but you … don’t make any commitment just keep the grind …try not to think too much about the past that you can’t change … present and future is in your hands 🙌 come on bro …

  • @judygoddard3869
    @judygoddard3869 6 місяців тому +5

    No one is ever ‘recovered’. You battle addiction all your life. Now and then you might slip, but that just means you’ve lost a battle - not the war.

  • @molagbal11
    @molagbal11 6 місяців тому +3

    I am here with you. On the same path. Alcohol is destroying everything around me. Doing stupid things and stuff.
    I have stopped for 2 months and it was the best experience of my life. Now I am drinking again, I hate it.
    When you are talking, feels like it’s me talking. We are gonna make it buddy, not today, not tomorrow, but one day - soon

    • @Nevill98
      @Nevill98 5 місяців тому +1

      It's never too late to get your life back on track. It's up to you to want the change. Nobody's gonna do it for you! I'm proud of you, Stick to it man!!! You and everyone around will be a lot happier! You got this!!!!

  • @boblossie3192
    @boblossie3192 6 місяців тому +4

    It's been a while since you've done this video. I'm hoping you're okay. I'll check it out to see what you've posted in the last 5 months after I send this off. I'll be doing the thumbs up and subscribing to give you the support I can right now.

  • @newthrash1221
    @newthrash1221 2 місяці тому +1

    Your story is so eerily similar to mine. I shared a band space with another band, I was in high school drinking on week nights at our band space and shows because it was cool to do and it was just fun to drink. I never got far enough to tour or take my music seriously because drinking took priority 100%. I'm 33 now and I've burned just about every relationship I've had with friends and family. The last few years, I regressed enough to continuously start blacking out and messaging people, starting fights, saying disrespectful shit, and just being an all-around being unlikeable person The made me feel less like I'm all alone in what I'm going through and hopefully be what I needed to hear to make a serious change.

    • @Jay-zx5hx
      @Jay-zx5hx Місяць тому

      Stay strong. It aint easy to stop

  • @harimayasharma7817
    @harimayasharma7817 7 місяців тому +2

    Hello Brother.....you and i an exact same story ...I am a drummer and a problem drinker....I binge drink....and i am struggling everyday .....I am 44 years old now ....my girlfriend left me Dec 23.....
    My mom was sick and had to undergo surgery....but i drank all day ...and even said "I love you" to the lady hospital guard .....
    Every time i drink i am mad ....
    I know alcohol is my greatest enemy .....but i just can't quit....
    Now I will try mindfulness meditation and pranayam( breathing exercise) hope it will help me .....
    And people say Naltrexone is a miracle drug ....so i might try that soon ....I am still researching though...
    All the best bro ....Hope we can make our lives better....and hope your fiance comes back to you soon 🤟

  • @TheKezza67
    @TheKezza67 6 місяців тому +2

    A new subscriber. Hi, I am Kerri from Australia 🇦🇺. Good luck. I look forward to your next video ❤

  • @archimedes8276
    @archimedes8276 2 місяці тому +9

    That's what alcohol does to people, makes you want it and nothing else and it's not happy until your dead

  • @njongomato
    @njongomato 6 місяців тому +1

    I appreciate you sharing brother. I hope you've stayed on your journey.