I Never Got What I Wanted...
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- Опубліковано 30 вер 2024
- Truth is, I never got what I wanted...
Instead, I got what I NEEDED.
I have journaled for the past decade and I do believe it's one of the best gifts I have ever given myself because it's such a powerful moment when my present self encounters past self. Every time I am humbled with gratitude. It's like being transported back into a Time Machine and witnessing my progress.
I know there will be more happy moments to document as well as sad. Life comes in cycles and seasons and I’m going to keep writing because I know I will be okay as long as I keep showing up everyday.
I lovingly encourage you to start journaling. Any old notebook will do. I promise you will not regret it. Future you will thank you.
Love Lindy xo
Hi, I'm Lindy! Welcome to the Bubz family. I am a beauty, lifestyle and mom vlogger. I make daily vlogs I call daily doses of happiness! Join me as I navigate this journey we call life and keep up with my little adventures. Be sure to SUBSCRIBE so I can continue to put a smile on your face. Do make new friends with fellow Bubscribers. I promise you they are the sweetest bunch ever! If you enjoyed today’s vlog, don’t forget to give it a LIKE.
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I loved how you clarified that he wasn’t so much a bad person but at the time he wasn’t a good husband, I’m glad your able to get along, as a child who parent couldn’t even be in the same street as each other so I know Issac and Ayla will thank you both in the future for creating a stable and loving environment for them ❤❤
Thanks so much. Until today there is no malice from my family members or friends either. We're only human. He may not have been the best husband for me but he is an amazing co-parent now and that's all that matters. It was a long difficult storm but it also took a big storm to shake us into the people we are today and I'm proud of us. I'm sorry to hear that it was a tough time growing up with parents that couldn't see eye-to-eye. I understand that friendship isn't always possible either and I hope your parents are in better places now. Sending so much love!
I would like to share something my father told me , when your best plans or best things fail , its not what you wanted or thought will be , thats where youll know that god is there and youre being guided to the right path which is YOUR path. Have faith in each day , one day at a time and know its going to be okay. You made it. ❤ He isnt with me anymore but his words have been true.
I love this so much. Your father is so wise with his words. Thank you for sharing lovely.
Thank you for sharing with us. It takes a lot to be this vulnerable. 💜
Bubz I FELT YOU when you said “I didn’t get what I wanted because I was asking for scraps”. ❤ what’s yours will never pass you by
Amen!!!
A psychologist said to me once that people who clean whenever they're anxious usually comes from control issues. Meaning, you are anxious about something you can't control so you do something you can: your space 😊 it's my way of pushing through, too!
I love that!! I feel like when my headspace is cluttered, having a cluttered environment just makes me feel worse too
I went through a break down of my 7 year relationship/engagement around the time that your separation happened. I felt so much comfort when you uploaded and had the strength to continue on despite the pain and suffering you were going through. You gave me so much hope that things will eventually be ok. Over 4 years later I have my own RG, making strides in my career, and planning our future together just like you are! It’s so exciting to see that you’re just as fulfilled, despite the lingering pain from the past that we’re still trying to heal.
Ahh what a lovely comment to read. Smiling ear to ear reading this. I'm so proud of you lovely. Well done for showing up everyday despite the pain and look where you are now. I love that we both healed together. Let's keep growing together!!
Through quantum mechanics you can achieve anything GREAT NOW
You’re on fire with uploading videos consistently! Thanks for blessing us with your videos! Hope granny bubz is well btw!
Yes!! Easter was so busy that the vlogs have been a bit backlogged. Thank you for tuning into my little videos lovely. It means so much. Yes GB is doing so well. In fact you will see her in the next video hehe xx
Having watched your videos for 10 years or so, one thing thats really helped me has been seeing your ability to find strength even when you feel the lowest of lows.
Living is a massive struggle for me but seeing someone do their best with the cards they were given makes me feel hope.
Aww... Thank you so much for your lovely words of encouragement. I'm so glad the videos made you feel less alone in the chaos of life. As sucky as tough times are, they are usually the moments I forge my greatest strength and lessons. I KNOW you are doing your best, on the right path and WILL figure it out. Proud of you!!!
@@Bubzvlogz Thank you🥲 Never stop being you, Bubz
This was a very touching video. Thank you for sharing.
You're welcome Olivia. Thank you for watching
I have been following since the very beginning, and what I always noticed and was bothering me personally, was how Tim was always on his phone in vlogs. If you were at the restaurant, at home, where ever, he would be looking down at the phone. That still remains in my memory so vividly. However, happy that you are happier in your relationship now and we should never settle.
I noticed in the last video that you used Tim’s name for the first time in a while. I was hoping that meant you were in a good place on your healing journey. It sounds like you are. ❤
Hey Bubz. I have been following you for a long time now, from bubbi brush days. I just wanted to share with you that I too was also going through my divorce of 10 years during the same time as you. I have a son and a daughter too. I feel like during that time, my only goal was to "make it to the end of the day". But little did I know, as time went on, I now reflect back and see that healing was happening even when it didn't feel like it at the time. I'm proud of myself and proud of you. Proud of us for pushing through and not settling for scraps. I will never beg for someone to love me ever again.
I felt every single word. I'm so proud of you mama and I'm proud of us. Your little ones are so lucky to have you.
You're "simply" traumatized and it affects your whole life. Your imagination was a relationship, marriage, family, getting old together, a fulfilled lifespan together. Raising your children together with a loving husband. But it came different. You raise your children in a great way, you cope with everything in a wonderful way, but in your deepest inside you wish having your family with your ex husband. It's not his foult, it's not yours. He has different imaginations, possibilities and you do. He wanted to do it, he tried in his own way, but it's not possible for him. I like your videos, you do great with your children, you do great as a human being. Go on and try to be happy, REALLY happy again.
(Sorry for my bad English. ;-))
I had a breakdown today, a big one, crying curled up on the floor naked. I felt gravely lonely. This video was the universe speaking to me, I wish with all my life the best moments of my life are yet to be lived.
I'm sorry today has been a hard one. It's okay to cry my love. Crying is soooo good for us so well done for letting it all out. You have SO many incredible moments and memories to be lived. You got this!!
Sending you the biggest hug
Omg wow you restored faith in me 😢 thank you love
It's ok to have moments of doubt. What matters is we open our hearts up again to let go of what no longer serves so we can receive more love and joy in
Thank you for this video, currently going through dark times right now and everything you said hit home to me, I never got the empathy, I was asking for scraps, begging for the minimal.. I didn’t realise that our love and family was conditioned! I felt lonely even though I was surrounded by my own children, I endured sadness and betrayal by the person who was supposed to keep me safe! Having memory loss was a easier coping mechanism. The pain is real, it’s raw and it’s hurting. I don’t journal because I don’t want to remember the sadness. Life is exhausting but i am blessed with healthy children and I know there will be better days..
Last week in my speech class, one of the assignments was all about love languages, this is what stuck out the most: “I am allowed to demand more from love, not to accept whatever love was being offered to me.”
Can you do a hair tutorial sometime? I remember doing the pencil curls from your tutorial lol. I threw out my early 20s journals I was so sad and didn’t want a reminder of it lol. I can’t really hand write a lot because of chronic pain but sometimes I write short things on my notes, daily planner or Snapchat ai when overwhelmed
Bubz, I have watched you since I was 15 and now I’m 23! Watching you go through all your trials and tribulations and coming out with such kind and wise words makes your vlogs my favorite thing to watch❤ thank you for bringing peace to my life you are such an inspiration I can only wonder how great the kids will be growing up with your mentally guiding them😊
i too somehow read my old journal by accident few days ago, and that got me decide that, i have to break up with my bf to end this toxic relationship. so i did, now single again
I'm sure it wasn't easy to make this decision. I'm proud of you for choosing you and I hope you're okay
@@Bubzvlogz sometimes still debating in my head: "do i regret? " nonetheless, thank you bubz, surely things will get better in the next chapter
This is me today at 1am. Feeling hopeless, delving into why I can’t get a bit of empathy…or am I too sensitive. I was asking for scraps too. He just never appreciated me ..and I kept on hoping he would one day. This marriage is going to shatter apart, I can see it and feel that shudder in my heart. God help me .
Thanks for always sharing and being so transparent about life and feelings with us. And showing us that life is full of ups and downs. I’ve been watching you for years and have incorporated a lot of your advice into my daily life! Thanks for being a big sister to us all! I’m glad you can still see the positive in the negative xx
I still remember your gratitude journal days while you were still living in Hong Kong! You actually inspired me to start a gratitude journal too when I was in middle school! I used to dote about Domo in the journal because I love poodles lol. I've actually gotten back into journaling just last year and it's became my comfort hobby. My favorite part is decorating the pages with stickers and washi tapes - it's like satisfying my inner child! I've managed to complete two journals so far, which I'm proud of because I've never filled up an entire journal before. You continue to inspire me, Bubz
Oh my word, I LOVE washi tape!!! I bet your journal looks so cute and I'm so happy to hear it's your safe and happy place Camellia. Thank you for such a lovely message to wake up to. Lots of love from NI!! xo
It gives me a next level of comfort to watch your videos and vlogs. The way you convey to never loose hope even at the lowest point, it always keeps me motivated. And I just wanna say that you're never alone! God is always watching over you and your family!! I wish all the happiness, success and health for you and your family... ❤
It makes me happy to hear the vlogs are comforting for you. Thank you so much for such a genuine heartfelt comment. Sending you lots of love from our family too xo
Would you consider writing another book, like a sequel to your first one?
thank you so much for sharing all these vunlerable thoughts. You're absolutely amazing for doing that! i'm so happy that you are in such a better place and hope that it just gets better and better. . Getting so many of your new videos is a total treat. you've done amazing with raising your precious babies despite all of this.
I've just turned 40 and have ended a ten year relationship. When you said you were asking for minimum it really hit me and made me have a realisation. I have to show up every day for my daughter. I'm very happy you are in a better place. I pray for the day this will to all be in the past for me. Thanks for sharing
Vanessa, I'm sorry it's been a heavy time. I think a lot of people rather have something (that obviously doesn't fit in the puzzle) than the thought of nothing and what you did is so very courageous. I'm so proud of you. Ending my marriage actually taught me so much about loving myself and I was finally able to love myself the way I wanted to be loved and that itself is so liberating. Not to mention how our children carries us through and no doubt I know you guys must have the most incredible bond.
@@Bubzvlogz Thank you so much x
Lovely to see you post
Hi bubz , me n my sister used to watch ur vlogs since u made the boyfriend tag and little intro videos for chubby and domi. I always look up to you. Im 31 now n have no partner till today, i feel lost in life , anything you say is truly inspiring to many of us. Please keep doing such videos .❤
This video is made for me. I live in a very hard time with my marriage along with my husband. And I think that after divorce God prepared me a better life.
I discovered my ex has narcissistic tendencies. I’m glad I let go. He drained my energy soo much and I am gaining it back. The letting go ritual helped too.
Been watching your videos for years! I just started my channel with my kids as well hopefully goes well 🙏🏼 thank you
I can relate to what you said when you said “I didn’t get what I wanted because I was asking for scraps”.
It was always like I was putting all the effort into my last relationship and wasn't getting anything back.
Thank you for the advice, i am going through the hardest time of my life (I just had a baby and don't feel like myself anymore) and this advice to journal and push through day to day really resonates with me. Thanks for the reminder that this too shall pass and we go through cycles of happiness and sadness in life. You're so wise!
Seeing your phone in the beginning made me think, would you ever do digital products? like cellphone & desktop wallpapers
Thank you so much for this vlog. This is ras true healing. And true self care.
As long as I can remember I wanted a boring, quiet and ordinary life. When I was a kid I never wanted to be a singer or an actress or a model, I wanted to be a teacher or a gardener. I couldn't wait to grow up, fall in love with a kind person who loved me, get my dream job, have a tiny wedding and buy a small flat and have kids together. I wasn't very creative in my wishes. Well... instead I would always somehow end up having the craziest adventures, meet the most flamboyant people, go to numerous wild parties and more and - I hated it. Many a time I was lonely and heartbroken. I felt so betrayed - my friends who wanted that intense lifestyle got MY dream future. So after many nights of crying I (yes, very dramatically) decided I have mourned my dream life enough and opened myself up to all the adventures and misadventures, and decided to learn the f* out of them, drain them dry. And that's when all of those tiny dreams started coming true - of course - in that twisted and exhiliarating way I later somehow tamed and grew to love. Obviously - I'm not where I thought I would be (literally), I'm with the best darn guy there is (even though it seemed unreal that we met at all) and my dream job just came to me, in a weird twist of fate. And I made sure I used every minute well, even when it was hard. Now I'm excited for what's coming my way. Because each season of my life pushed me to discover who I am and what I am capable of, something I would never learn if I got my sheltered, quiet, wimpy wish.
It's true - as cliche as it sounds - trust the process. As you paint, the picture can become flat nad murky and you no longer feel like finishing. But just wait for the moment you get to lay over the lights, the darks - there will be beauty to all the shapes and colours that emerge, even if it's not exactly what you imagined.
I LOVED reading this. Thank you for sharing your journey with me Sheimi. I totally get you. You would not be who you are today had you not experienced all those highs and lows shaping you. Proud of you!!
@@Bubzvlogz And I thank you - for being so brave all this time, and sharing your thoughts with us. You've built such a safe space here, full of kindness and I'm proud I get to be a part of it ❤️
I don't wear makeup and never did but I enjoyed watching you occasionally. Though I could never relate to all the bubbly energy. However, I've found our worlds colliding, here I am single with a toddler and a baby. I have a hard time imaging I will find an RG. Somehow ALL the female youtubers/social influencer I love and follow has or is experiencing divorce and I feel hopeless at the moment.
I'm sorry it's been such a difficult time lovely. Right now, just focus on 3 things. Healing, yourself and your babies. UA-camrs and influencers are just people end of the day and the truth is, everybody has their own story and struggles. Please know you are not alone. It's ok to have moments of doubt but know it will pass. The pain is temporary and it won't always be so painful.
Love your journey and updates. It gives me hope that nothing is too late. 😊
Thank you Jade. It is NEVER too late to start again ❤
I was looking for an idea how to deal with all the mental load and frustration I am building up and a friend told me that whenever she starts spiralling she writes down how she feels. And now you uploaded this video and I guess it's a sign I have to pick up journaling again.😂 I used to do it when I was younger and it helped a bit. Also I am extremely happy for you and your ex husband, you dealed with the divorce so well while being a public person. It would be so easier to say bad things about him but you don't do it to this day. You guys being friends again, understanding what actually happened and moving on to being the best co-parents is an amazing achievement!
Ahhh I definitely take it as a sign to journal Megan. Thank you so much for your kind words. It means so much xo
I will be buying a notepad first thing tomorrow 😁 Thank you for creating such a warm, safe space full of positivity.
“'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord, 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future. '” - Jeremiah 29:11
✝️🤍🕊
“Healing ourselves is a personal movement we embark on to let go of all conditioning that limits our freedom; in this journey, there will undoubtably be moments of bliss and difficulty. Real happiness and wisdom grow from the reality we experience, not from the fleeting moments of bliss we feel.”
- yung pueblo, “inward”
This video really reminded me of my favorite quote from that book, i recommend you read it!!
Thank you for taking the time before telling us your story. I love you Bubz, thank you for your vulnerability, we’re always here for you 🤍🤍🤍and those kids? C’mon, they’re everything and more. You’re an Angel doing gods work🧚♀️🤍