Dara Ó Briain On Depressing 6am Lapdances | BEST OF Talks Funny | Universal Comedy
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- Опубліковано 21 лют 2020
- Dara talks worst names for a strip club, saving a naked man in a newcastle hotel and extreme methods of preventing crime.
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Website: www.daraobriain.com/
Twitter: @daraobriain
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#Comedy #DaraÓBriain #MockTheWeek #StandUp - Комедії
Medusa is actually a great name for a lap dancing club.
Think about "one glance, youll be hard as a rock"
get a job in marketing! XD
Also, before she was turned into a monster, she was one of the most beautiful women of her time
Bravo sir 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
Yes. Great surface-level marketing... Because if you read beyond the first Google entry, you'll get to the part where she was raped, and then she was transformed into a gorgon either as a punishment or as a protective measure so that she could never be hurt again (there are various interpretations of the myth).
Then again, nuance and night clubs don't exactly go together, do they? 🤷♀️
👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏
Turns out when they did the anti piracy film they themselves broke the law because they used copyrighted music without asking permission. So telling people not to break the law while they breaking the law. How ironic
also - if you're committing piracy, how is that possible without an eye patch and saying 'aaaaah me hearties' while you rip something off?
@@moaningpheromones the only apropriate music to accompany your internet misdeeds : ua-cam.com/video/Th6PW5VwDFI/v-deo.html
@@moaningpheromones p
Not ironic. That's called hypocritical.
@@jessicaevans7847 I'd say its ironically hypocritical
*Jesus, there's a lot of doors in this bathroom.*
"We're not good enough for you, you even numbered pricks?"
...I laughed because I live on the odd numbered side of the road.
I was laughing whilst thinking "No, you're not"
I live on the even numbered side.....
Do you know anyone on the other side of the road?
Medusa's Strip Club: because you aren't looking at her eyes.
It's like I just watched father ted and black books at the same time.. love this bloke.
9:33 is an expression we've seen Bernard Black doing before.
Friend of mine lived in an apartment over a brothel. They were really nice Ladies and always took on his parcels from the postman when he was at work which was great since they had kinda long opening hours.
@Samuel Black Classic
I expect if you ARE running a knocking shop, you make it your business to get on with your neighbours
@@Bazookatone1 Story is from Germany. Prostitution is legal here. Which I am very against by the way.
@@AVKnecht ah, it's not hurting anyone
@@AVKnecht but you will subscribe to a only fans model... same thing
"Stuck up even numbered pricks"😂
I'll leave my blinds open but I keep aquariums within view of the windows so people at least have something to look at 🤣
*Please tell me that naked man was Ed Gamble 🤣
👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏👏
Considering this was from Dara's show in 2008, It wouldn't have been Ed lol
The music behind the anti-piracy warning (you wouldn't steal a car etc) was stolen from the person who wrote it, Melchior Rietveldt, who sued for royalties owed
That Piracy thing on DVDs isnt really that accurate, if I could download a car rather than buy one, I'm most definitely going to.
"You wouldn't download a house"
Screw you guy i would if i could
Or you wouldn't have to be harassed if you if you just download the fing thing... Good job in annoying the people who gave you money, best pro piracy campaign ever!
You wouldn't shoot a policeman and steal his hat. You wouldn't go to the toilet in his hat, and send it to his grieving widow... and then steal it back again!!
You can now 3D printer one these day 😉
Hello Bad Ash.
Meeting the neighbours from across the way is tricky in Venice, too.
I'm so glad you have a channel! I miss Mock the Week!
Dara O Briain is just plain BRILLIANT.
Medusa's the slogan should be, "We only turn one part to stone."
In our medusas, we'll turn your snake to stone alright..
You’ll be Hard as a rock
@@br1mst0ne54 Now, this depends on which rock you are referring to. Granite, for example, is quite hard, having a mohs scale of 7. However diamond is rated 10 on the mohs scale. And, coincidentally, is created via a process of heat and pressure, much like being in a strip club.
Now Talc is considered the softest rock on Earth, with a mohs scale of 1.
So depending on which rock you are referring to, one is left pondering the entire situation. If you were as hard as talc at a strip club called Medusas, then it's likely that this club is found in the dingy backwater parts of some biker infested sleaze hole, replete with women with large areolas, bleached anuses to disguise the over use of said anus, and missing a number of teeth.
But if you were as hard as diamond, then it's obviously the cocaine was not very good and you're somewhere in Las Vegas, where the pole dancers can perform magic tricks with their vaginas.
I dunno, but now I'm bloody horny...
@@parishna4882 heck, if you wanna get ultra specific, start with the part that Medusa is actually a GREAT name. Medusa's whole thing was that she was so beautiful that Aphrodite got jealous. If anything, this is a highly cultured strip club with someone who knows their greek mythos. There's nothing sexier than a cultured strip club.
@@Gihntemos Put that way, I'm calling my sock Medusa. Makes it less... uhh.. salacious when I peruse the fine quality content on xhamster. :(
*sorry medusa, it's not the foot, today*
"Are we not good enough for you, 'ya even-numbered pricks!" 😆
Strip Club Names; there is one near me called, "The Office", so you can tell your wife, or girlfriend, "I'm just popping into the office, for a couple of hours. Love you. Byeeeeee!"
If I were manufacturing alcoholic drinks, I'd call them: 'responsibly' and 'carefully'.
The Medusa is a gorgeous woman who gets you rock hard! I thought it was very witty!
Because she was more beautiful than...Hera I think? One of the goddesses anyway.
@@greyjackal she was a beautiful woman who was raped by posieden in Athena's temple. To protect her Athena changed her hair to snakes and made her face so terrible that it was petrifying to behold. So yeah not the greatest name for a lapdancing club.
@@greyjackal nope she was raped by Poseidon in the temple of Athena so she cursed her
the being raped by poseidon thing and cursed is actually a more recent addition to the gorgon tale by a roman author called Ovid. In the greek tales she was just a monster alongside her sisters, though they were reimagined as being beautiful by the 5th century. I will admit that the poseidon story has a lot more drama to it though and is definitely not outwith the gods typical pettiness.
@@SaviourInDistress yeah it was changed as a way to mock Augustus Ovid was known to hate unjust hierarchy so made sure to show those who rule in very unfaltering ways
Take it from a fellow who's house just burned down: you absolutely want a house that's been on fire, because the insurance company then makes it as up to code and fireproof as possible.
YAKULT is a probiotic beverage, just incase the beverage isn't sold in your country or area. DETOL is a bronze colored disinfectant liquid sold in the UK, CANADA, and AUSTRALIA.
Detol is a brand, their products come in various colours
Hey guess what. I'm reading this on a computer. I can look things up for myself. P.S. It's Dettol.
@@mikelheron20 look how smart you are! Oh boy!
You forgot New Zealand, you xenophobic xylophonist.
Dettol is a companies name and they sell product in basically every country
😂🤣😂🤣😂🤣😂 ❤️ you Dara - effortlessly funny and always up for the craic ❤️
God I love the faces that Dara makes.
7:55 I'm from Coventry. I can believe his story about the crime interupter kidnapping and cutting the guy up for stealing his car.
It really happens haha.
As well it should!
awsome, i laughed so hard at medusa
My #1 favourite comedian!
is "Medusa" not the best name ever though? the whole place gets men as hard as a rock just by lookin' at it
Genius!
6:34 Same thing happened to me Mum!
Only a carving knife :D
I think the point of calling it Medusa is the part where it makes you hard 😂
i'd love to see a comedy where Hugh Dennis is Neville Chamberlain and Dara is Churchill..
8:00 it would be even funnier if the thief was actually in the audience as well
it's uncanny how much Dara O Briain looks sooo much in my head like O' Brien from the book 1984...he will be the perfect actor for that role
"How many fingers can you see?"
Not the same in Irish
15:58 did someone say "Matt Damon"??
I believe it was 'Bad Neighbours' but I don't see how Matt Damon is a problem XD
Huhmhuhnhehhuhmhm
Dara so clever 😂❤
He is brilliant 😂😂🤣
😹ok naked in the corridor HILARIOUS STORY 🤣😎🤓😘LOV dara 💚💚💚💚
I went to the toilet after a one night stand and stepped into the corridor instead of the toilet... reception wouldn’t help me especially since I didn’t know her name
You wouldn't steal a ship
PIRACY IS A CRIME
That's got to be the best DVD-pirate I've ever seen.
I've heard lots of people tell that story about shutting themselves out of their hotel room naked because they chose the wrong door. I'm wondering how many (if any) are actually true!
I work nights in a very quiet hotel. In the 10 years I've worked there, I've found naked guests wandering the corridors on 4 separate occasions.
“They’re supposed to get sick”
Reaaaally different story nowadays my man 😬
AllMight good healthy dirt is ok but not snot from a sick person. Just make mud pies in your own private fenced yard.
Diane Patt That’s fair. As long as they stay safe and leave the worms alone :)
@@elliptical6957 my sisters used to eat worms, and there was not time they were playing with my cousin, racing snails and the biggest snail won, and it was like the size of my fist, and my sister just reached over and ate it, shell and all, and then my cousin yelled, "oi! That was my snail!"
Now they're both 17, I was like two when it happened but I never stop teasing her about it, luckily by the time I was six, my mum had gotten better at getting her children to stop eating insects
Book Reader That’s hilarious 😂 I can’t say much tho, my older sister convinced our younger sister to eat a slug because she said it was chocolate...needless to say, it really wasn’t 😂
@@elliptical6957 haha, i think we were all dumb as kids
They're possessive about their cars in the Midlands.....
Wish we could find a damn handyman to put up some curtain rails!
Medusa is actually a real good name for a lap dancing club, it turns men to stone
Makes em hard
Medusa has closed down now. I think it’s city centre flats.
LMFAO 🤣🤣🤣🤣👍👍👍👍
The worsts thing that happened in a house is water damage and mold... oh and bedbugs. Mainly because they can't be fixed realistically... you have to burn it down.
@Heloise O'Byrne ...I take it back... Having Matt Gaetz as a neighbor....
Good work commenters!
There was one in Tucson (Big Air Force Base there) called Sirens, and I kinda get that, but Medusa? Seriously?
That hotel in Newcastle us actually pretty decent. Least dara could have done is given him the dressing gown from the bathroom.
Missed joke there, Medusa also turns you into stone. "rock solid"
Brexit giving so much material to British and Irish comedians !
In my home province, the listing realtor is obligated to tell a prospective owner if the house is reported to be haunted.
At least that was true the last time I i checked.
That would be fun
13:55
Presumably Dara is really regretting sticking with MTW about now.
Britain's best comedian. A personal opinion (obviously).
Think he may object to that
"hello? oo - hello!"
1:30 But-but-but how will we play Theft and Shrubbery?
So Dara wants us to have the curtains/blinds closed during the day otherwise he’ll look in? 😂 Great. Darkness all day long. 😂
Curtains and blinds are not the same thing. Curtains can be (usually are here) made of some sort of lace or gauze - lets light through, but disrupts the image.
@@CyberiusT I know. Hence why listed both. Yeah any decent blinds or curtains you wouldn’t be able to see through. Unless some really poor quality net curtains which I’ve never seen the appeal of. I would have been better to say darker than normal rather than dark, haha.
@@CyberiusT Curtains are solid - net curtains are what you are referring to (in the UK, which is where Dara is doing this stand-up).
😁😁😁😁😁
🤣 🤣 🤣
Lol
Man from Liverpool and he didn't say to go down the dock?
What you don’t want in a house.... a fritzal basement
that’s cov for you
Medusa makes sense. Medusa "you'll get hard as a rock."
But isnt it fine if you don't see her eyes?
I've never been to one of those clubs, but I don't think the men are looking at the women's eyes.
I find looking in women's eyes part of any attraction, and seeing a bored or depressed look doesn't do it for me, thus why I don't go to strip clubs.
Could someone more recently irish than I tell me what the feck he said at 10:25? Pour what into a what-now?
Yes.
Dettol is an antibacterial liquid.
Yakult is a high percentage acidophilus probiotic drink.
Mick's demotions = Mixed emotions.
🍻👯🍀
Wow. My blood pressure would be sorted if I got that good an answer on computer forums!
Basingstoke let’s go
Ever notice the adverts for 88 casino play out of the box but the videos buffer like a dawdling child in a sweetshop
why no adblock?
14:14 when I get killed in amoung us and am a ghost.
That really depends if they are naming it for after she is turned into a gorgon or before when she was just a normal human because when she was a normal human she was extremely beautiful well that's how the story goes anyhow
perfect name eitherway mate : " our girls will make you _rock_ hard "
Warning : if your petrification lasts for longer than 4 hours, please contact a licensed oracle.
As for the Medusa club… doesn’t she get you rock hard?
I would certainly download a car if I could, that stuff is expensive.
I wonder if the neighbour thing is because none of the people across the road share a fence? No saying hi while in the back yard.
You’re soooo funny Dara O’Brien , how I would love to be in the audience at one of your shows.If you ever make your way to Detroit Michigan please send me a ticket and I’ll come by god. Love what you do, thanks. 🎟
went to the doctors recently. He said: "Don't eat anything fatty". I said: "What, like bacon and burgers?". He said, "No, fatty, don't eat anything."
We don't have curtains in the windows of the downstairs front room and our previous neighbors just used to give us judgy looks whenever they saw us because I sometimes have to go into that room topless to get a top i want from the washing line in the back garden or to fetch a towel.
Our new neighbors are a group of college students, 3 young men.
They are the friendliest neighbors we have, they even offer to get us anything we need when they go shopping and i helped one of them with some editing for free although I usually charge graduate students for that, and for translation which I've done casually for them too because they're afrikaans and the coursework is in English
grow-op - don't u have grow-ops in the uk?? they're the worst...
I bet the homes on the other side of the street were odd numbered!
this guy looks exactly like Stewie from family guy
That writer has passed on from their current job, turning it into their past job. Dear oh dear. My English teacher would have had a fit.
Are we not good enough for ya? Stuck up, even number pricks.
I love grand designs, mostly because even as a lesson with no knowledge of construction, project planning ordesign, I can see that the projects are way to ambitious . I think it mostly because I enjoy seeing this idiots fail. Esp since this is seaon wat now, have these people never seen a previous episode?
If the curtains are cracked open is that teasing?
How did you guys let that one get passed you?
It's spelled "by" dummy
Hate the way they cut it.. 🤷♂️😕
Data must have been one ugly kid
Stop with the repetitive cornetto ad. I cannot eat them 😠😠😠 over and over and over
re - Medusa
Actually, Medusa was VERY beautiful, according to mythology. This seems like the kind of thing you should have googled before making that joke...
Additionally, as Family Guy already joked about, Medusa is a GREAT name for a strip club, the idea being "One look at our girls and you're rock hard!!"
Finally, there are a LOT of beauty salons named Medusa. Again, this is something you could have googled, before chastising others for not googling and realising that YOU'RE the joke, rather than you having made a joke...
Weird take… he’s a comedian, he made a joke he thought people would laugh at and they did 🤷♂️. The chastising as you call it is the set up for the joke. Strange thing to get so worked up over.
Fuck me that's brutal, how do people find him funny.?
He's not funny at all