WALKING away from a disabled parking space?
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- Опубліковано 9 лют 2025
- During a day of errands, I had to use my wheelchair to get around a shop. Following that, I had an appointment on the other side of the same shopping complex. So I drove across the parking lot to get closer.
Here’s the twist: at my subsequent appointment, I had this to consider: I’d be sitting the whole time, I parked very close, just a few feet from the door, and my body was stable enough where I could get inside without using my wheelchair.
I couldn’t help but feel anxious and ask myself:
1- Could I trust my body to successfully get me in there without a mobility aid?
2- Will the waiting room be empty with plenty of places to sit?
3- Would someone notice that I used a wheelchair earlier and walked into this appointment “just fine” now?
4-Would someone misunderstand my situation?
5-Would they question my need for a wheelchair?
6-Would they get confrontational about it?
It’s not fair that disabled people like myself have to fear harassment in this way. I want to shed light on a common misconception surrounding disabled parking spots. In this video, I delve into the reasons why someone might walk away from a disabled parking spot, highlighting the importance of understanding. Let’s challenge assumptions together and promote inclusivity! 🌍💙
[Video Description: Annie, with long black, wavy hair and glasses, wearing a black and white striped shirt, sits in the driver seat of her car talking to the camera]
![Straw Bans Are DANGEROUS For Disabled People [CC]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/uRy_0IEwxMw/mqdefault.jpg)
![Straw Bans Are DANGEROUS For Disabled People [CC]](/img/tr.png)
This goes for the disabled bathroom as well. People see someone walking out of the disabled bathroom who looks 'able', and maybe they make a scene. What they might not consider is the person in the bathroom might have a stoma, or they might have a condition such as crohns where they might need more space, might need a sink and a bin right next to the toilet, or they might not be able to wait in the queue for a 'normal' toilet to become available. Maybe the person has severe anxiety or sensory issues and needs the defensible space to feel safe etc. Some people have the kind of privilege where they never have to think about these sorts of things... so they don't even know it exists.
I use the disabled bathroom everywhere I see one because here in the UK it also tends to be the gender neutral bathroom. I'm non binary. I'm also neurodivergent and I've got anxiety. Being in the bathroom with other people makes me uncomfortable. I prefer single stall bathrooms. I really do.
That could be for all sorts of reasons. One that immediately springs to mind is that this is an able bodied person parking in a disabled bay because they're collecting a disabled friend or relative. It's not misusing the space, the disabled person being collected does need that accommodation.
This is why disabled car parking badges are issued (in the UK at least) to the person, not the vehicle.
Here in the US it can work that way as well. My daughter has the placard & anyone driving her can use the space and put up the placard. Although my husband always says "Fly the flag!" as if I'm hoisting the Jolly Roger.
You are so right I have seen cerebral palsy and I got a electric wheelchair this year and I use it in the afternoon when my legs are too tired to walk keep doing the good work you do making videos for youtube
Yay, you're back! I'm wearing your "The future is accessible" sweater right now!
I’ve been on Instagram a bit and a little on TikTok! Starting to bring the short form content on here. I’ve been considering getting back into longer videos but it costs me a lot in terms or energy and resources. Short form has been more accessible for me recently! ❤️
I've had people snatch my white cane off me and accuse me of faking being blind, and many more challenges besides. I think the reasons people call fakery on disabled people are complex and varied, but mostly I believe it's because they have a limited understanding of what disability is and means, and maybe the only time they encounter stories including disabled people in the media are when someone has been shamed for 'faking it' or through people with disabilities being evil supervillains in comics and movies.
That’s horrible 😢 I am so so sorry this happened
100% me! I always say my issue is with longevity, not agility. And also if I’m walking into somewhere like Target, people might fail to understand that the shopping cart I’m about to use will stand in for my mobility aid. I just need something to lean on sometimes. There are also a myriad of reasons why I need accessible parking, and those reasons vary day to day. Sometimes it’s just that my condition is highly variable, so while I might be fine now, I could rapidly become NOT FINE and need to get back to my car as easily as possible. I’ve had enough days when I’ve not used my badge and regretted it that I don’t risk it anymore.
That being said, while I live in fear of being confronted, it has yet to actually happen to me in the ~5 years I’ve had a badge. One time I walked out of a Trader Joe’s and got in my car, and I saw a much more visibly disabled woman trying to flag me down as she made her way to my car. I thought, “Here we go,” and rolled down my window…only for her to just want to tell me how pretty I looked. 🤦♀️
I know I’ve been lucky so far…so sometimes I will do something like use my cane even if I’m not feeling like I need it at the moment, just as a signal to other people. And it sure would be nice if, like you said, people could just be relied on to mind their own business, so disabled people didn’t have to add “Confront an ignorant person about my disability” to our list of things to worry about.
I use the shopping cart as a mobility aide!
@@Catlily5 I always get a cart, even if I only need a few things!
@@shayelea Me too!
Love how you put that-disability is a time limit..
Thank you❤
This is one reason that I asked for a permanent license plate as well as a blue hanging placard. I figured I would get less harassment that way. I also put a magnet on my car right next to my license plate that said "not all disabilities are visible."
I waited years and years and years (too many!!) to ask my doctor if he would sign a disabled parking form and he immediately said yes of course. He knew that shortening the walking distance would at least slightly reduce the degree of the symptom flare-ups.
But there wasn't much opportunity out and about to get harassed:
First of all, I almost never go anywhere, due to managing my own chronic illness symptoms, which sometimes make it unsafe to drive, and always make it painful to drive even short distances.
When COVID came around, it was a great relief that staying home was supposed to be normal! I also stayed home even more than usual, to shelter in place, both for myself, and I was the live-in caregiver my very high-risk, immunocompromised family member. 99 percent of our shopping shifted to online orders & grocery deliveries, and I almost always used the drive-thru at the pharmacy. And when I was parked at medical locations, my mom was visibly disabled and I walked her in and out of the building.
Now I don't have a car, but if I get one in the future I will definitely advocate for disabled plates and add a "not every disability is visible" right next to it again.
(Several people sell stickers and magnets like that online. Many are invisibly disabled themselves. It's always good to support those artists when I can. There is also a disabled-owned business in the UK called Stickman communications, that makes pre-printed cards to show to people if you don't want to spend the energy explaining what your needs are. No one knows strangers an explanation about parking needs or diagnoses, but that is one option for situations that you want to inform people about that stuff.)
Yes! I’m an ambulatory wheelchair user due to POTS, Long Covid, ME/CFS. The comments and harassment from others sometimes is so upsetting that I don’t walk when I’m able to. I’m afraid to stand up to reach something on a store shelf, for instance bc perfect strangers will say things like “shame on you”. Not sure what perks they think I’m getting from being a wheelchair user in a world that is very inaccessible and my chair brings about stares, comments and judgement.
It is endlessly ironic that these harassers think they’re protecting the disabled community from interlopers while simultaneously being one of the worst parts of being disabled.
Your videos are great. Thank you.
I was born with Spina Bifida but I can walk pretty normally my one leg is a tiny bit longer then the other though so people can see that but besides that my brain doesn’t really tell me when I have to go to the bathroom and I also have a shunt and a tube that drains the hydrocephalus from my head into my stomach and a sown up hole in my lower back. I’ve never personally gotten into an argument with people who thought I wasn’t disabled so that’s good.
Disability is a time limit on yourfeet-there are so many kinds of disability even invisible ones, maybe its just a learning disability or your hearing or a million other medical conditions. The public need educating theres so much ignorance surrounding disabilities and invisible disabilies
I love your content so much! Keep up the great work!
Thank you! A lot of people don't realize that maybe a disability cannot be seen and that can lead to ignorance leading to crap like this! It's getting to a point where we as a community just want to be left the f🤬ck alone!
💜💜💜💜
I miss you ❤❤❤❤❤
Drs don’t just Sign off on handicapped placards for no reason . I have an extensive medical history & very much need my placard . It gives me so much more freedom .
Your thought processes in the description sounds like me doing spoon math.
For me it depends on the day. I got good days, ok, terrible, and good enough days. Also sometimes it hurts me to walk; even if mofos cant see it hurts.