How To Stop Your Child's Whining Without Yelling | Dad University

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  • Опубліковано 1 лип 2024
  • When young children or toddlers whine we often battle it with some expert parenting techniques like:
    - Please talk in a big boy voice
    - I can't hear you when you are whining
    - Use your words
    - or the amazing: Stop Whining!
    The problem is they rarely work. In this video, Jason first goes over why children whine so we can understand it better. He then explains some techniques and tips you can use to get your child or toddler to stop whining.
    They are trying to communicate but really don't know how. They are needing something so it is important for us to understand how to assist them in order for the whining to be stopped.
    Remember, positive reinforcement and empathy will go along way in reducing your child's whining.
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КОМЕНТАРІ • 92

  • @DadUniversity
    @DadUniversity  3 роки тому +2

    Hey Guys, hope you enjoyed learning how to stop your child's whining without yelling. If are ready to become the best version of yourself as a father and want to go from confused to confident, you would love my Parenting Program. Book a call with us to learn more: www.daduniversity.com/application/?=ytc61

    • @DataGeek903
      @DataGeek903 3 роки тому +1

      My kids whine for none of these reasons. Not that they're frustrated or trying something new. Just don't want to do anything try anything new or even do what we agreed to earlier. Ignoring doesn't work either. I've ignored whining for 2+hours with no change in behavior.

  • @bennyk1559
    @bennyk1559 3 роки тому +24

    I am so thankful for this video it really helped me teach myself to stop whining.

  • @katielight3345
    @katielight3345 4 роки тому +18

    I’m a teacher and I hear my entire room whining if they don’t get to watch what they want to watch. It’s a cacophony of “nOOOO” and “we’ve already seen this”. I’m going to pay really close attention to the ones that don’t complain and make a big deal out of it.

    • @mfran458
      @mfran458 3 місяці тому

      Kids whine = worksheet

  • @dedwards0797
    @dedwards0797 4 роки тому +13

    Thank You, Thank You, THANK YOU!!! My husband and I have been struggling with our 1 year old... The whining is out of control, and I didn't know how to deal with it

    • @DadUniversity
      @DadUniversity  4 роки тому +3

      You are welcome. i'm glad the video was helpful.

  • @jasoninnes572
    @jasoninnes572 3 роки тому +10

    Video starts at 1:22

    • @Kerrviii
      @Kerrviii 6 місяців тому +1

      Thank you

  • @danmatejka7380
    @danmatejka7380 Рік тому +1

    Very enlightening video! Made me realize I was doing the stop whining and use your words 😂!! The question I had was I have been teaching my almost 5 yr old son how to ride his bike with training wheels. He has been doing an amazing job the last coue of weeks. I know what he is capable of and have been put through challenges of hills, falling and going down hills. The last couple of days he had rode.his bike on average of 2.hours. I'm a single dad and he never has a consistent schedule of spending about a 50/50 amount of time between both parents. So other day when my son was riding over a bridge and up to the top he was going down hill and in control. He just started unpredictably screaming I'm scared and wanted to get off the bike and push down hill. I will be honest I go into coach mode trying to motivate and keep him interested in riding his bike. My son screaming I'm scared was that his way of connecting with me or was he genuinely scared? If neither do.you have any red flags to look for cuz I know him pretty well to pick out a fake temper tantrum which he does a lot to a real tantrum 😂. Thanks and hope this is easily understood haha.

  • @icatchbass5333
    @icatchbass5333 3 роки тому +4

    The first couple of examples in the first couple of seconds we're fuuny

  • @Greeny_isthegoat
    @Greeny_isthegoat 2 роки тому +1

    I have twin boys. My one whines alot and tells me I hate him when I reprimand him. Thank you for your help. Ill be more patient with the little guy😇

  • @royalblaze212
    @royalblaze212 5 років тому +1

    I love this

  • @MPllll.
    @MPllll. 3 роки тому +4

    LMBOOOOOO The beginning 😂😂😂😂

  • @veronicakattan8458
    @veronicakattan8458 2 роки тому +3

    I have definitely fallen into a pattern of 'stop whinging its annoying' with my 5 year old, I need some help with this because it drives me crazy. I will use your tips, I really hope this works

    • @hollywood7702
      @hollywood7702 8 місяців тому

      Did it work or did you find any other method? I have twin whiners over here, its way too loud to stand another year at this volume.

  • @user-ec3uu6gg8y
    @user-ec3uu6gg8y 9 місяців тому

    i will.try this and let you know whats the good result

  • @ladym7852
    @ladym7852 8 місяців тому +3

    Don't let it bother you...riiigggghhhtttt. 😭😭😭lol Thank you for the vid.

    • @mestayno
      @mestayno 10 днів тому

      yeah. When she throws a 45 minute long fit at 7:30 am

  • @gabrielaamorofficial
    @gabrielaamorofficial 3 роки тому +2

    Going to try this method .
    If you have any suggestions when they talk back and keep doing it and not obeying simple instructions like “ sit down please” “pay attention to your class” ages 6-7 any tips will help 🙏🏻Thank you

    • @DadUniversity
      @DadUniversity  3 роки тому +3

      That age can be difficult as they have a ton of energy and get distracted easily. Ask them the question "what could we do to help you pay more attention?" Ask them the answers and see what they come up with. Us barking orders at them all the time isn't fun for us or them.

  • @dbrad5197
    @dbrad5197 2 роки тому +2

    @Daduniversity.The way I look at is you can teach your child to behave or the world will do it for you in a lot less forgiving way and which will probably lead to all sorts of psychological issues for them in later life.
    So be hard if you have to( not physically) to get them to behave otherwise they will suffer un necessarily when trying to make sense of the real world. We don't live in a perfect times where everyone's emotions are considered so prepare them for it. Be there as support not a doormat. Interested to hear your reply if you have time.thanks

    • @DadUniversity
      @DadUniversity  2 роки тому +1

      I'm not sure what you mean by "be hard" but if that means consistent, have rules and boundaries, then sure. You do have to have realistic expectations of what a child is capable of at a specific age. For example, a 3 year old sitting quietly at a restaurant for an hour is an unrealistic expectation.

    • @dbrad5197
      @dbrad5197 2 роки тому +3

      @Dad University yeah by hard I meant strict, consistent etc as you stated. There are people I know who take the softer (more loving approach as far as they are concerned) approach and their children literally walk all over them and make their life hell.
      Sometimes kids are just being brats and you don't need to check in with their 'misunderstood emotions' you need to set your boundary and they are not allowed cross it and it will do them the world of good in the long run. You know your child so when it's BS then Call it BS and act accordingly. what kind of person is someone raising if they don't do that. Like do yourself and them the favour

  • @theBlankScroll
    @theBlankScroll 11 місяців тому +1

    Im here and at my wits end.

  • @anjelinadixon6372
    @anjelinadixon6372 4 роки тому +2

    When my brother sits in the halfway by my mothers door and cries for attention in the form of whining or a tantrum

  • @trueblissconsciousness2821
    @trueblissconsciousness2821 4 роки тому +4

    I have Auditory Processing difficulties so I really need help with this. 🙏

    • @citygurl0105
      @citygurl0105 4 роки тому

      Are you the parent or child? Sorry for the silly question but I think my son has the issue. It's frustrating

    • @trueblissconsciousness2821
      @trueblissconsciousness2821 4 роки тому

      @@citygurl0105 I am the parent. What would you like to know?

  • @magickanna
    @magickanna 2 роки тому +2

    What do you do of ut is a 9 year old.

  • @mestayno
    @mestayno 10 днів тому

    but my kid doesn't whine on subjects like she doesn't want to leave. She whines all the time because of mundane stuff...... I can't stop the whining..... It's impossible. She drains me so much........

  • @ashleypeterson4510
    @ashleypeterson4510 3 роки тому +2

    I find that my 3 year old whines most often when playing with his older sister. She will do or say something that sets him off on a screaming and whining fit faster than you can take a breath. Often times I have caught my older child doing something to purposely get a rise out of him but sometimes it’s something as small as her picking up a that he perceives as his and beginning to play with it, this is even when he wasn’t playing with the toy. I have done my utmost to try and encourage calm communication and problem solving techniques for them to employ but nothing seems to help. 🙄

  • @dani09eveline
    @dani09eveline Рік тому +3

    Your 2 year old toddler is not trying to ruin your life 😅 if ya say so lol

  • @Kerrviii
    @Kerrviii 6 місяців тому

    I let this go until she was 2 years
    Old. I gave choices, I was fun & patient and happy… for 2 years straight on my own. I thanked her for being such a good girl.
    We had an outing with family and she is even more spoiled and not only needs my boob & shares my bed (I can’t sleep! I can’t move), but she’s so mean to me!
    Why should I keep being so patient? It’s not working. The only time she does listen to me is when I’m mad.
    It hurts my back to have her wrestle me just to change her diaper. I give her everything, I laugh, I make it all fun…. She can be so sweet and usually laughs too… but it can take hours to get her dressed! Help!!!!!

  • @Amatullah_94
    @Amatullah_94 2 роки тому +1

    Beneficial

  • @coffeequeen182
    @coffeequeen182 2 роки тому +1

    What if the child is 7 years old? Still whining after so many techniques

    • @DadUniversity
      @DadUniversity  2 роки тому

      It doesn't happen overnight. Wondering how long and consistent have the techniques been implemented? It likely means the whining is still working...they are getting attention or what they want.

  • @divinelotus19
    @divinelotus19 2 роки тому +4

    Another great trick, ask them how long they want so they can collect themselves.

  • @CiibEEZY
    @CiibEEZY 2 роки тому

    What about the 3yo who isn’t really talking quite yet ? I’ve tried but nothing 😔

  • @christinamarin4875
    @christinamarin4875 2 роки тому +1

    So I wonder If it's to late for me😬. My daughter is 7 and she whines and gets upset if something doesn't go her way. Mainly if she can't have TV time, or go outside with a friend or have a candy.. things like that... Can it still be reversed.

    • @joannawatkowska9563
      @joannawatkowska9563 2 роки тому +1

      Ohh, my kid does it too! And he is almost 8. Sometimes it gets really intense..like whining half a day, which influences everyone around.. I am so tired after that and somehow sad.. I also don't know what could help. Maybe it's just his way of dealing with negative emotions.. I try to be patient and show him love when he does it.. but sometimes it's difficult..

    • @ahomemakersministry
      @ahomemakersministry 4 місяці тому

      ​@@joannawatkowska9563Have they stopped now? Im in the same boat with my child...

  • @JamesJablonski2008
    @JamesJablonski2008 5 років тому +1

    Cities babies vs country babies are not the same maybe?? Living styles are different.

  • @toxicaf6173
    @toxicaf6173 Рік тому

    My girlfriends daughter is 9 and somewhat special needs. All day the whining is almost nonstop from the moment she gets home from work. She is diabetic always asking for something with sugar, she whines when she can't go outside, when she has to take a shower, has to brush her teeth, has to wash her hands. Almost every task or anything she can't do when she asks is accompanied with whining and sometimes with a cry and turning completely red in the face as if she is going to explode. "no you can't go outside right now" for example is accompanied by "but why" with a string of 'but whys' following it even when an answer is given. I'd say more than half the time she has to be told 2 or 3 times to do something. She can verbally communicate just fine and everyonce in a while she says things like "I'm sorry for being bad all the time" she understands shes doing it but it feels like she doesn't comprehend a lot when trying to explain to her. I can't get her mother to try any other approaches and she doesn't think she is that bad (she is) although she is aggregated or annoyed with even just her presence sometimes and is just in a mood when she comes around. She doesn't notice it but she is miserable all the time. Idk what to do 🤷‍♂️

    • @DadUniversity
      @DadUniversity  Рік тому

      Have you seen a professional in your area? It sounds like there is a lot going on. A simple response on YT isn't going to solve it. I would suggest seeking a therapist or counselor in your area in which the family can go to.

  • @karenhunter3113
    @karenhunter3113 Рік тому

    My daughter babysits a kid who whines a lot. He's 6 and has full on tantrums. They're asking me what they should do. I thought maybe they could make a game out of it. See who can make the most annoying whining sound. Take turns whining, just turn it into something other than he thinks he's going to win by annoying them. It doesn't help that the mom gives him whatever he wants to shut him up.

  • @tiffy0210
    @tiffy0210 Рік тому

    My daughter & any check out line. She throws a fit for candy.

  • @Kerrviii
    @Kerrviii 6 місяців тому

    So she’s NOT trying to ruin my life?!! 😂

  • @strawberryme08
    @strawberryme08 3 роки тому +1

    My 9 year old whines and cried all usually fake but she does it with my husband not me. Nothings worked ever so far. I can’t do anything because it’s an issue with het and my husband she never gets enough attention. It’s exhausting and we have 3 other kids. I think she and her dad are codependent with each other but he’s not willing to look at any of the issues and it makes hell for everyone at home.

  • @TheEnigmaProductions
    @TheEnigmaProductions Рік тому

    My mom’s answer for whining was a beat down

  • @nicholasquinn7893
    @nicholasquinn7893 Рік тому

    oh god, I finally ended up here. lol

  • @marriedvlogger275
    @marriedvlogger275 3 роки тому

    Make my nonverbal child’s mother listen and INTERNALIZE what this man is saying.

  • @kristen4050
    @kristen4050 2 роки тому

    Alright how do we train the dad to be more patient with the whining issue? Our 3 year old will whine about seemingly everything some days. I feel the times he is whiney is because he wants to feel connected and is sad when he doesn't. Not understanding that feeling he resolves to anger and frustration and will throw fits over small things. Dad often gets frustrated and annoyed and will quickly punish the whining. Which in turn makes our son feel more alienated and disconnected.

    • @li-aramatlock2594
      @li-aramatlock2594 Рік тому

      Be the best example you can be. Be patient. He will learn be curious and slowly adapt

  • @ranatofte1192
    @ranatofte1192 Місяць тому

    My 3.5 yro whining all the time non stop it’s nerve wrecking unfortunately nothing is working

    • @mestayno
      @mestayno 10 днів тому

      I'm at the same exact spot! She's making me regret being a father honestly. So sad because other times when she's nice I kind of enjoy the role......

  • @Angela.Victoria.85
    @Angela.Victoria.85 2 роки тому

    I nanny for a 15 month old that makes the most obnoxious whiny sound I’ve ever heard. It’s hard to listen to some days. 😩 Help! Parents how do you cope?!

    • @DadUniversity
      @DadUniversity  2 роки тому

      The child might be trying to communicate something

  • @djlowtek
    @djlowtek 2 роки тому

    What about younger? Just wailing and whining (under a year) ?

    • @paulh3892
      @paulh3892 Рік тому +1

      That’s so young that crying is the only way they can communicate any needs. Just run through a checklist: wet diaper? Gas? Can they see a family member? Hungry? Comfortable temperature or body position? Overstimulated? Tired?
      With my kids I just go down the list of regular needs. If they are still screaming give YOURSELF a few minutes after they are in a safe spot.

  • @dmactrialz6809
    @dmactrialz6809 Рік тому

    Well I watched this video with my 14 year old daughter and it didn't work she whined about it the whole way through and she still wouldn't stop complaining anything else I could try ?

    • @DadUniversity
      @DadUniversity  Рік тому

      Nothing happens overnight. 14 years of whining is going to take some time to change. Keep with it.

  • @dflei7
    @dflei7 3 роки тому

    ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

  • @pamalawyerick2004
    @pamalawyerick2004 Рік тому +1

    My Parents would tell me to stop whining and if I didn't, they would spank me! Yep! I wasn't a whiny kid.

    • @Kerrviii
      @Kerrviii 6 місяців тому

      Same!

    • @adsf6033
      @adsf6033 5 місяців тому

      I tried that it’s not working

  • @Idontcare-rj2gs
    @Idontcare-rj2gs 4 роки тому

    Worked till my kid was 5yrs but not later she gotten more whining now I have to set boundaries very firmly else I reach out to her teacher to help her understand. Her DAD has spoiled her to the extend that she wants 🎁every time we shop. If I empathize to her she becomes more whining and demanding. I have to explain to her for an hour with an example of what you would become in future if you don’t listen then she empathize and gets soft and this whole thing has to be repeated every time she whines. My hairs are fading now but now I have a whining toddler son 😅 I m for sure going to die sooner 😂

    • @quaneshapeair9191
      @quaneshapeair9191 3 роки тому +2

      My son is mostly whiny with me. When I come home, he is chill and independently playing with dad. As soon as I’m around, he turns into a big whiny baby about everything. No amount of mindful attention makes him feel fulfilled enough to play on his own when I’m around. I teach coping skills to children and I follow the rules laid out, have scripts etc. It is still the same. I’m exhausted, I have a tic. Let’s pray for each other 🙏🏽

    • @Idontcare-rj2gs
      @Idontcare-rj2gs 3 роки тому

      Quanesha Peair 😂 sure Amen 🙏

    • @DadUniversity
      @DadUniversity  3 роки тому

      Do you mean he wants you when you are around?

    • @riav7467
      @riav7467 3 роки тому +1

      A whack usually stopped my brother and me from whining until we were old enough to understand that it was simply irritating to whine about anything.

  • @Greeny_isthegoat
    @Greeny_isthegoat 2 роки тому

    Hahaha yep

  • @ruchisingh4253
    @ruchisingh4253 3 роки тому +1

    My two year old boy constantly whines over every thing nowadays. He never understand anything which we told him when he got cranky. He also not able to speak more than a word. We avoid him he got more cranky. If we go closer again he throws anything on us. If we told him what he wants he never respond and only got angry... So don't know now what to do

    • @DadUniversity
      @DadUniversity  3 роки тому +1

      Have you confirmed with a pediatrician that there is no medical issues going on?

    • @panacampbell6732
      @panacampbell6732 3 роки тому +1

      You mentioned that he is 2 and he doesn’t say more than a word. It may be because he can’t express himself and he is frustrated. It is common for toddlers to scream, hit, throw things, or even bite. It doesn’t make it right or you should allow it, but it is common. I would definitely see your pediatrician and let the doctor know about how much he is speaking and what you are seeing at home. The doctor will probably suggest he get a speech screening and may qualify for services. Delay in speech can affect other areas of development, especially in reading. As a reading specialist, I notice students that have a delay in speech AND don’t get speech intervention tend to also have difficulty in reading. Luckily your boy is young and you have lots of time to get him the help he needs. Once the speech comes along, he will be able to tell you what he needs and wants. Good luck!

    • @ruchisingh4253
      @ruchisingh4253 3 роки тому +1

      @@DadUniversity @Pana Campbell yeah... No issues at all according to them...according to them it is happening because of language difference between parents and native language of Norway. We are Indian and speak Hindi at home. In the kindergarten he only listens Norwegian

  • @lisahamyoung2039
    @lisahamyoung2039 2 роки тому

    My 4 year old doesn’t stop morning to night about food about everything. You ask what do you want to eat this or this she starts crying , no no . Pretty much if she doesn’t get it her way she won’t stop

  • @daninicole3481
    @daninicole3481 7 місяців тому

    I’m a full time parent to my grandchild who is 1.. She’s been off of her pacifier for a month now. She whined before and now even more that she has not had it. Whines when the cup of milk or water is done. Loudly cries in stores at times. Sometimes I’m stern when I tell her to stop and she does most of the time. But I feel like there could be other ways to get her not to whine. Please give me advice? Her mother says I should try giving her the pacifier again. I really don’t want to go back to that.

  • @kristinyaekelnegley3978
    @kristinyaekelnegley3978 Рік тому

    🤣 women and moms really need to learn how to lighten up and laugh about these things like a lot of dads do.🤗

    • @Kerrviii
      @Kerrviii 6 місяців тому

      We deal with all of the stuff all day.

  • @princeandqueen5412
    @princeandqueen5412 9 місяців тому

    How do you not get upset ? Please help. I feel like when I get upset I’ve held it in from the past times of not getting upset then it just feels so overwhelming like omg all you do is whine lol. He whines every single time I say to get dressed or let me do your hair (spray it and sponge it) or let me put some oil on your skin…I feel so triggered and upset

    • @DadUniversity
      @DadUniversity  9 місяців тому

      Checkout this: ua-cam.com/video/TwRdU2mop0U/v-deo.html Learning patience is crucial and takes a lot of work :)

  • @mirceacostin1935
    @mirceacostin1935 2 роки тому

    😒 This is why our kids are growing up so sensitive and this is why our society is the way it is...

  • @truthinrevolt6843
    @truthinrevolt6843 5 років тому +3

    isnt this type of parenting techniques what gave us millennials..... and we all know how they turned out. It seems to me, this is how it turned into hurt feelings mean the end of the world and imo thats not good for anyone. our future generations need to be more resilient not weaker

    • @DadUniversity
      @DadUniversity  5 років тому +2

      The techniques we teach are designed to produce self confident, self sufficient, moral children who impact the world in a positive way.

    • @truthinrevolt6843
      @truthinrevolt6843 5 років тому +1

      @@DadUniversity Thank you for the clarification. I'm not a dad yet (today's the due date but she just doesn't want to come out yet lol). my biggest concern is instilling a STRONG moral compass especially with how degraded the world is becoming. thanks again, In Lak'ech

    • @BeadsandFlowers
      @BeadsandFlowers 5 років тому +1

      ua-cam.com/video/-HFwok9SlQQ/v-deo.html
      Here's a good video about "millennials"

  • @dellismichaelson4390
    @dellismichaelson4390 2 роки тому +1

    Bad vid

    • @DadUniversity
      @DadUniversity  2 роки тому

      what would have made it good?

    • @dellismichaelson4390
      @dellismichaelson4390 2 роки тому

      Here’s the story. I showed this video to my 10 year old grandson. I did not realize that he later put the “bad vid” comment on there until I later saw your reply. Needless to say this hit a nerve with my grandson. I thought your video was helpful but I need more help with my grandsons behavior.