How to do for Treatment HOCD/SOOCD | Homosexual OCD - Sexual Orientation OCD
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- Опубліковано 15 жов 2024
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The treatment for Homosexual OCD/Sexual Orientation OCD can be really tough. Let's go over what the treatment looks like for HOCD/SOOCD. Many believe that someone who struggles with this is just in denial. This can exacerbate symptoms. I want us to change this perception and the evidenced-based treatment for this subset of OCD.
The following topics are covered:
👉What is HOCD or Sexual Orientation OCD?
👉How to use exposure and response prevention for HOCD.
👉An example of an exposure hierarchy for HOCD.
👉Examples of how to do an exposure for HOCD.
👉Medications for HOCD
MUSIC:
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Disclaimer: What I am talking about is related to Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder. It is not political in any way. It is not a for or against being gay. To learn more about this subtype of OCD go here: iocdf.org/expert-opinions/sexual-orientation-obsessions
Hi sir good day ..I'm just asking if Is it still hocd if you feel something in your groinal or the anal part twitching and moving when I see men..my brain always tells me I got anal sex with a men..I'm a straight guy I've never had sex with same sex..And I feel so anxious when I see men( I developed androphobia) imagining having sex with them and it feels so real :( I always doubting my memories If I did it or not..is it also part of ocd?..hope you see this sir
sorry for my English sir
thanks you so much
@@Dbiss If they are actually gay why are they doing on an SO OCD forum?
Could the fear also be about being bi, it was only about being gay at the beggining but then a thought about being bi pop into my head and the simtomps are basically the same, but they feel more real cause I'm actually into girl and that's half being bi, but then I had this anxiety moments with dudes and I feel like I'm actually into them
Please help me 😭😭😭
This is how I overcome from this (my opinion)
1. Do workouts , meditations
2. Do some works and concentrate on it.
3. Don't overthink about it. Sometimes it comes. Try to ignore that thoughts and dont care them.
Remember one thing
These are all just thoughts that randomly spawns in your brain and that doesn't make you gay. You know you're straight. Stay strong guys.
hello, i hope u r doing good n get thru this. i wanted to ask u a question, during this phase, have u tried to mastrbate to gay pon? if yes, how was the experience in general and compared to straught porn?
Thanks bro
Really having a bad time
Thanks, needed this! Been struggling with these thoughts since last Saturday night even though I know I'm interested and attracted to girls from the bottom of my heart.
Chad
@@armanbaig5981 honeslty it’s like some demons in your head
This makes me so happy that im not the only one affected by this during quarantine
Cian Jones yes lol I blame 2020
We'll all get over that shit, man. Stay strong!
bro... i have not related to a comment more than i ever have in my entire life than i just did right now. it’s been affecting me since march. never once had any sort of homosexual thought or feeling, but once quarantine hit... BANG! i have this. i know deep down i’m straight, always have been, but this keeps bugging me, and i have this thing in my head that tries to lie to me and tell me otherwise.
@@enderbed7594 same bro Ive always liked girls and this came out of no where like wtf
This thoughts came to me in these quarentine days
Man, this really sucks, it feels like you're just not yourself anymore. I've been dealing with hocd for 1 year and a half, I haven't been to proper therapy because in my country doctors are not specialiced with OCDs, but in my case ocd comes and goes, everytime it comes back, it's stronger. Tomorrow it's my birthday and my only birthday wish is that every person dealing with hocd can get over it and be themselves. Good luck everyone, I know you all gonna get over it soon!
Bro my birthday was 2 months ago and it was the worst birthday of my life. I all day thinked about this stupid thaught and for my birthday wish, i only asked god to help me get away to this. The tomorrows day i saw these hocd videos and treatments and it really helped me but the fear once got gone and it came back and it has happended so many times. Dont listen to your mind listen to your heart i know that im straight and always have been and i pray every day to god to be straight all my life. Hope you have a grear birthday even if its hard to pass this stupid thought that has ruined our lives but trust me we all that are watching these videos we are all straight. With the help of god we will pass this amin inshallah
@@DG-mw8bj thanx for ur words man, am glad am not alone in this batle. We all need proper therapy for this. Hope u can find ur way back to be urself.
@@onedavid4430 thanks bro i wanna get rid of these questions that pops in my head even though i know they are not real but it feels that are real. Ive always been atrackted to girls and my hocd came in a stupid way. I was watching a music video and someone got a good wearing style drip and in a stupidly way a question came in my head "am i gay or what"? The gay stuff has not any sense if someone has a good wearing style i dont know why that question popped in my head it had never happened to me before. Than i got in really deep gay thoughts which i couldnt stop than and i saw a video that said you just should ignore the thoughts do not analyse them and you should not act for them. Its ok if you cry or you get emotionally because we are all straight and we dont know these things to happen. I still now have some thoughts but i just ignore or avoid them. How did your experiencr start bro but if you dont wanna go back in how it started is ok
@@DG-mw8bj hey is there any way we can talk? Going through this too for 3 months now it sucks but surely I’ll get my mind back inshAllah
@@DG-mw8bj hey is there any way we can talk coz my case is just like u ..wanna get over it
You guys.... u don't know how happy it makes me to know that i'm not fighting alone.
Yeah bro and Today some random person at school called me a faggot and I hate when someone calls me that because it makes me worried what if I am gay and I been straight and never liked guys but I hate when people think I’m gay or call me gay or a faggot it makes me worried and scared
I feel u bro 😪 and when I'm not worrying and I'm actually relaxed for a while my brain says that I'm accepting it and starts worrying again.
Do you guys experience other symptoms of ocd?
Do you experience all symptoms of HOCD??
@@Taxicab123 I've experienced about 3 other forms of OCD. I feel a lot better now bro.
@@_tellavision I am not expereincing other form of ocd,what does it mean?
Battling with this during COVID is like setting the difficulty to hardcore
True
This. Jesus Christ! the quarantine was going so well until 4 months ago and BAM! Thoughts started pouring into my head. I’m just glad I have a decent mental fortitude. I’m sure it will get better eventually.
LMFAOO facts😂
FACTS
The High Ground I’ve been at war with it since 2017
This method really helped me alot so here it goes: you got to accept it as a thought and stop thinking "what if its not"; when the thought pops up again just say "I know I'm straight so whatever" or when the thought pops up again say "I dont care" and move on with your life. I know its very hard to do this, but it really helped me out a lot. I've been struggling with this thing for 3 years and I believe that accepting the thought is the first step towards fixing this.
I did the sem thing 😀
@@heromanageryt7321 how long till it went away?
@@Jdkdkdjfs it hasn't went away yet. My condition went worse , so talked with my brother and he said that stop being a homophobe. And if ur hormonaly not attracted then ur not gay
As simple as that. But first stable ur mind. U control ur own thoughts. So when u get these thoughts , take 4 deep breaths in and out and say "relllllaaaaaxxxx, relllllaaaaaxxxx , justttttt relllllaaaaaxxxx" . Slowly you will grow habit of not bothering at all. Don't let the thought engulf you. Talk with someone 🙏
@@Jdkdkdjfs also with experience like @ljhan , slowly steadily I believe we will stop getting bothered bcuz at a point this will just bore you
@@heromanageryt7321 i solved mine to 90% in 1 or 2 days Just always think of other things Directly and dont think about the thought itself then it should leave in a few days and only some thought for 1 second pop up a few times a day but you will be instantly bored of them or laugh about them like i do, be Patient
I’m extremely scared because I know these thoughts aren’t mine but my mind wants me to think there mine
@Dagoberto Trevino i have been having these types of thoughts during the lockdown. I'm really scared and eagerly don't want to turn gay. it will completely contradicts to the way i am. it all started with a fight with my friends.... i knoecthese kinds of things don't happen overnight. plz suggest me ways to overcome this. i tried mentioned in the video butcthey made it severe. ur help will be appreciated
@Dagoberto Trevino did you have heart palpitations when these intrusive thoughts hit you...?
Aye bro. Drop your snap so we can talk cuz I wanna talk to someone who struggled with this
@Dagoberto Trevino I’m even more scared that I’m gay because when I used to think about something gay my heart would drop now it doesn’t I know I’m straight just not that much freaking out over the fact that my mind says gay stuff does that make me gay
Tamela Robinson aye bro what’s your snap we can talk ab it
i had this for 2 years and now i'm fully recovered and i don't even think twice about my sexuality anymore !! :) i know exactly how it feels to be at the lowest point and think it'll never get better or go away but it did and i've never been happier
how
What did you do? Any tips would help
@@peggysyri3193 i just ignored the thoughts and i know that sounds a lot easier than it actually is but every time i'd get an hocd thought i would try my best to not react to it or overthink it and instead i would distract myself doing something else like music or a show or school, it took a long time but now i'm completely recovered i even have my attraction to guys back
Please give us advices
Please give us advices...I am extremely fearful of being gay and get sensations down there and have to check that i'm not aroused every time im around a male colleague, friend etc. ANd I've been a straight man all my life, slept with over 50 women in my lifetime and had many relationships but had two repeated incidents of ED and thats what drove me to thinking i could've possibly been gay.
If anyone is suffering from this now, just know that it will get better over time. I myself had to undergo therapy for this , but now I am able to think normally. Sometimes I do get some triggers, but I am able to control those better than I used to. I am still in recovery process though. Just don't feel that you are alone. Please.
You’re not alone. I just spent the last week doing 8 hours of research on Reddit. Take his course. I’m going to
How did you find your therapist ? And was it just a normal ocd therapist
@@montysmith1597 I worked with a therapist and she didn’t help. I still haven’t found a good therapist but this UA-camr is suggesting good ones. I’m on rexulti medication and that’s helped a lot. I feel like the voice isn’t there anymore
Aye I need help
What do you tell your doctors or therapist
I’ve experienced this for the first time in my life during quarantine. I’ve had a lot family and professional stress. To make things worse I was given a false health diagnosis which shot my stress levels through the roof as I took many tests to understand what was wrong with my health and life. I feared losing my quality of life and health and then came the HOCD thoughts which pushed me to have panic attacks. All this and I didn’t know what was happening to me. I’m now in therapy and have a much better understanding of what I’ve been going through and these videos are very helpful. Much love and support to all who are working through this.
This comment section saddens me that everyone is suffering from this, it’s actual torture. but it also makes me happy that Im not the only one who has these thoughts.
Yoo broo you gonna grt thought thigh my boi
when people ask you do you think you’re gay or when people say do you like the same sex does your heart drop and do you panic and when you say no does it feel like you’re telling a lie?? even though you know you’re straight like wtf?
My therapist asked me and I explained to her what I felt, then I got diagnosed with this. Lol. But yeah don’t worry it’s not just you. It’s sucks and it’s scary but I have it too and it’s been on and off for years. I hope you are doing better now since this was written a month ago, I recommend a therapist if you haven’t tried one yet, they do really help.
oh my gosh i was JUST saying this!!! you're not alone girly i feel the EXACT same
110% relate to this comment. I'm straight, you're too.
Yeah!
This happend to me cuz some bulky told lie to everyone I was a gay kid ,now everywhere I go people think it's true cuz he said it ,and I get bullied for no reason whatsoever
I’m glad this is a more known thing now. I don’t have this obsession anymore but I did when I was in my early teens in the 2000s. I was a tomboyish girl and got bullied and called gay. I was never actually attracted to girls but the thought seeped in. When I was finally diagnosed with anxiety disorders in 2011 for other reasons (health anxiety is my main obsession), I cried when I read a description of HOCD because it was exactly what I went through as a kid and thought I was going crazy.
I'm so sorry for your struggles:(
Did SO-OCD affect your attractions?
How did u get through it
@@vaifram8843 yeah health anxiety has been the main theme for me my entire life. Wouldn't wish it on anyone.
@@444.sanuji_n I kind of grew out of it, I guess. Eventually stopped caring. And medication.
Right?? Yeah I struggled a ton with this in like 2012-2013 and the resources for help were so sparse, I’m so glad that videos like this exist now. Honestly sometimes I thought I had this EXTREMELY rare condition because it differs from germ and health OCD, but now I’m realizing that all subtypes of OCD have a ton in common and it’s just as legit as the others. Channels like this are a godsend!
i just watched this denial video about this girl in denial and i started freaking out and tearing up what if i am gay this has been going on 2 months i’m ready for this to be over
You've got this girl. We are here for you, we understand the panic and the anxiety. This is obviously terrible, but we will get through this together and live our lives again!!
I know what you mean its terrible everytime I'm with some of my best buds i always think "should i come out?" And i know I'm straight but my mind just thinks it for some reason
It's the start of it, it's normal I used to do the same, just don't do it and don't do orientation test to be relieved it will get worst. But I assure you it can improved, I am the proof of that. Gays are afraid of coming out they are not afraid of being gay, lesbian like seeing beautiful girls, us we are afraid it's not the same
I think I watched the same video as you?Do you have snapchat maybe I am reallt looking to relate to someone
@@soleneguyot7041 i dont like how people say that youre supposed to be uncertain even after treatment... like i know im stright but my hocd bugs me like what if youre bisexual and after recovery i want to be able to say with certainty that im straight and not get triggered or doubt...
Also what do you mean in the last sentence?
I’m glad to see I’m not the only one struggling with this. I am a 20 year old straight man. I’ve never been attracted to men whatsoever but ever since I was 19 this thought just bombarded my head. Every time these thoughts of “could I be gay?” Would make me try to figure it out by looking at other dudes and asking myself if I’m attracted to them. It just fills me with anxiety and disgust, which in turn would make my little man (you know what I mean lol) and my boys (you also know what I mean) to tense up and somewhat retract. FYI I’m neither homophobic or religious, it’s just that these thoughts triggered physical sensation such as anxiety and my “boys” tensing up has kept me in this cycle. Stay strong everyone.
Made a group on ig for all we are struggling HMU if u wanna be added @deathbyrow
Same. we will make it through it!
I don’t care at this point if I’m gay or straight I just want these thoughts gone
Same.
The thing is you do care just like all of us that’s the only reasons you have the thoughts
Dagoberto Trevino I mean that I’m having the thoughts about being gay it’s just I’m not feeling the anxiety as I used to
I feel bro.
@@WillWinterss I'm way better now lol it goes away I get it sometimes but it isn't scary as it was and it normally comes like once a week
*finds out HOCD is a real thing*
My Anxiety: 📉
*”HOCD ain’t real, you’re just in denial”*
My Anxiety: 📈
🤦♀️I hate when people say that. And it’s usually people who are already like that who are just trying to sway you.
Dude, why are you not lying
@@meganp9107 Alot of gay people at my school tried to text me and tell me that I'm just in denial and should just "cross the rainbow already", and it made me murderous and enraged at not only them, but the gay community as a whole.
@@vontreoneal310 yeah I don’t blame you and I completely understand. I’m not “homophobic”, nor do I hate gay people as individuals (although I hate the sin), but I get so irritated when they say that because in our hearts we know we’re not like that. But OCD lies, so if you consider it for even a second, you go in full on panic mode because you’re not completely assured about how you truly feel or what you truly believe (because of the OCD), so your mind is pretty much at war with your heart (or the truth), and I know how difficult that is.
I am and always will be here for you and if you ever want to talk about anything, I mean literally anything, you can talk to me if you’d be comfortable with that (on here or in private). I have lots of wisdom from going through so much and having so many thoughts, so I’d never judge or make you feel guilty or abnormal because you, and your thoughts, are not :)
(I’m sorry if you got this more than once because for some reason my phone kept deleting the comments when I refreshed the page.)
@@meganp9107 I have a question because I feel like I need someone's opinion on this. Since Thursday last week I started having these feelings of fear that I may be gay even though I am straight and have always been. Thankfully I seem to be having it pretty mild compared to most people in this comment section since I don't get any sexual thoughts when I see men and I can hang out with my male friends like I always do. My attraction to girls is the same as ever but the only thing I have is this strange feeling of the possibility that I may be gay and it scares me but the only thing that feeling is doing is making my heart beat fast in a very aggressive manner idk if its anxiety or not. Can you please tell me your opinion on this? Is it HOCD and if it is how bad is it
i swear i cry about this every day and i just recently started getting super angry about it i’ve been dealing with this for 2 months my mind wants me to come out and it’s just such an impulse to do that it’s happened before but not this intense i have a boyfriend and it’s affecting my relationship so much i keep questioning everything
it keeps repeating in my head, I thought I was the only one
Yeah it sucks. I’m scared I know I’m straight but I feel the need to “confess my feeliings” to a girl who I don’t have feelings for. It’s sucks I freaking hate it.
Holley Gilbreath I feel you so much, like this only happened to me the other day, my brain hit a trigger with it, like hours before it happened I didn’t think anything about it, like whenever I saw a guy I would never think anything of it but now I keep questioning myself too and testing myself and The paranoia just tells me every time “you’re gay you find that man attractive” and I literally freak out so much every time
Holley Gilbreath, God bless you. I will pray for you.
Jax 2TheMax, don’t be afraid. Hocd is trying to get you to think it’s not ocd, but it is. You got this, stay strong!!!
I just wanted to say a massive thank you for making this video.
I am a senior, male, 17 years old. My sophomore year of high school, while surfing on the internet I stumbled upon an article about an unconventional way of sexual stimulation (something to do with the prostate, no further details needed). All my life I knew for certain that I was straight, so out of curiosity I tried it, and I liked it. Despite having never been scared of or even considered a relationship with another male, this terrified me, because I thought that this meant I was gay. Until now this incident has driven me down a destructive path of desperately ridding myself of any gay thoughts whatsoever. I have compared my responses to different stimuli almost daily, and I have read so many articles about how to cure myself of being gay, despite the fact that I had a girlfriend and loved her very much. This compulsiveness in my mind had me CONVINCED that I was gay unless I drove out every little thought for good. The thoughts got so bad I actually started to believe that I might really be gay and that I was just hiding it the whole time.
This video helped me to realize that I was never gay in the same way I knew before the incident that started this whole ordeal, I was just conflicted in the head. Today, I am slowly learning to be comfortable with gay thoughts, because I know that I am straight, and it is helping me very much, so thanks so much to this man.
Do you really believe your born straight?
@@raschidmalik464 shut up mate.
The worst thing about this kind of ocd is you can't tell anyone who hasn't experienced it or have studied ocd they literally wouldn't understand
Fr tho cuz then they get the wrong idea
I don’t know if this will help anyone, but this helped me a lot during my battle with HOCD. If your thought just started of no where and was triggered by something, not a desire, it is HOCD. People who are in denial have desires for the other gender but won’t admit them. You jus get an irrational fear that has not evidence to back it up. Most people will also have signs from their childhood that they like the same sex.
So when I found about Chris being gay and stuff this gay thing came in my mind then it grew grew grew and it took over mind making me think stuff that’s gay becuase iam literally really attracted to females and I know that because I find then beautiful and cute..
But what about things like false attractions? Apparently it can make you feel attractions that aren’t really real. Mine came out of nowhere and I never had desires before hand and I still find it kinda disgusting but it keeps popping up in my head and it feels like desire
@@sethhill9690 Ocd is literally designed to make things look real, otherwise you wouldn't have doubts about yourself and there wouldn't be any problems.
Great advice about letting go and not trying to solve anything. For those of us who were sensitive men as kids, it really becomes an issue of your "real self" being 'gay'.
Per example, my father would always call me gay because I liked dancing or singing or watching anime and so forth..being nice is also considered 'gay' by men- there is so much of the word around just being yourself. Have compassion for yourself.
I’m going to take your course as soon as I get paid. This video is already life changing. You know exactly what you’re doing and I’m excited for my life to change.
Thanks so much for your kind words! 💜
@@ocdandanxiety just help me. Can’t be like this anymore. Last week I spent 6 hours one day and 8 hours the next trying to just figure it out. It gave me the worst headache and made myself physically sick
Im trying to ignore the thoughts, however, what you said at the beginning scared me a lot, actually, it might just be my impression, because am not an English native speaker, however, I surely know am straight, but one day, many people started to come out, and tell they're gay etc.. Then I got scared, without any foundation, and started to think "what if people think am lesbian?" "Omg thats not possible, am not lesbian" And then i started to cry, i washed my face, i looked myself at the mirror and then the thought pop up "you're lesbian" I started to cry and pray a lot, i told it to a very near person, and started to tell me things as "for me there's no problem if you are" And it scared me a lot, i know am straight.. After a few months with it, i found out i had HOCD.. And actually, i felt so calm when i knew... In past i also had ROCD.. However, i started to ignore the thought and use mindfulness way...right now im almost always repeating myself "am not lesbian.." Several times, i said to me, ok now stop reassuring, ignore the thoughts, play piano, listen to music, watch funny videos etc... And actually now i feel a little calm.. When a morning i woke up, and i felt like, i had to try to be, but i don't wanna, am straight and i know it, and i don't feel lesbian, and i've never felt, i've always been attracted to men, and dreamed always men, and fell in love with men, always men... So, im starting to think like "I can be what I want... Feelings and Thoughts dont matter on my will..." Because, we can be what we like, and what we feel to be, I've always looked at boys, and just to boys... So, i know i won't become lesbian, just because i got the biggest proof that im not... the ANXIETY everytime i look or think about a girl...
I just wanna relax,and stop thinking about that
Sorry but when you had hocd did you get really anxious when you say a girls picture ,not that you found them attractive, you just get so anxious, sigh ,i need help
Yeah same i liked girls all my life i even have a huge crush on a girl,But then these false thoughts came by and it made me scared that i am gay but when i found out about HOCD this made me calm.
I had the exact experience as you do. One time it kinda held me "hostage" for using my friends and used past memories and alter my perspective of being "lesbian" and it got so bad that it triggered me into a depressive episode and made me vomit a few times
@@yeetushiatus1908 omg I puked yesterday and always have an aurge to vomit
@@AKHIL024 you too I’ve woke up many times throwing up and shaking
I am going through this (and having other kinds of intrusive thoughts) during quarantine. I’ve done a lot of progress since i found out that so-ocd was “a real thing”...knowing that my “instinct” was right (i knew it wasn’t a denial process) and that other people also are going through this makes me feel more validated, and even more balanced to face the thoughts and to be aware that it is just the “ocd” acting in my mind. I am seeing a therapist and seeking for useful information about symptoms and treatment. Your video was very helpful. Thank you!!
And for the people who are also facing this, I know it’s stressful and tough, but we are brave and strong enough to “win” this battle...we are going to be even stronger once this goes away :)
p.s.: brazilian articles and posts almost never talk about this...so this contents are being like fresh air to me hahaha tks again
Aye bro. Drop your snap so we can talk cuz I wanna talk to someone who struggled with this
@@Paragon.whyttt drop your snap and I’ll add
@@Paragon.whyttt3 years ago lol, u still wanna talk bc i’m struggling a lot recently.
It's been about a year since I got over my HOCD thoughts. I just want to let you guys know that there's light at the end of tunnel. It's possible to be over it !!
Some of the things I did:
1. Meditation, Breathing Techniques
2. Surround yourself with company, try not to let yourself be too lonely
Did you overcome it completely?
looking back at this video made me realise i came a long way and im proud of myself . Ive always said when i got through this weird HOCD phase i was gonna comeback and inspire some of y’all and support y’all who are currently going through this because this isn’t easy . and 5 month’s later here i am. Ima post another comment sharing my experience and how i got over it
First of all,I wanna say that HOCD is a real thing there is plenty of different OCD’S don’t let anyone tell you other wise .second of all have faith and belief and trust in Jesus and trust the process.third you will get through this Key word YOU WILL!! And btw im not like this guy and the video who had a degree and and license im just a guy who experience HOCD and got over it
Helpful tips for recovering from this? Thank you.
@@jaygoat7424 yea u gave no tips
@@jaygoat7424 so gay ppl are just having hcod? like everyone is born straight but these thoughts came and ppl got confused with which is their thought and which is ocd and they become gay. is that how it works?
5 months you have it easy man
What techniques work for you in feeling some comfort through your OCD? 👍🏻 Comment Below!
Is it possible to have ocd and not have a fear of contamination/germs? I've been suffering from other subtypes, but I've never had a fear of germs
I included your shoutout in my first episode of Talks With HR where I talk about different subtypes of OCD, groinal response, intrusive thoughts and unwanted arousal - ua-cam.com/video/X-x9zmCqUhs/v-deo.html
Man, your treatment made my HOCD worse, i mean, that one to "overcome the fear by saying that you're the fear" I did it once, and now i cant stop saying that im lesbian, big problem, am perfectly straight, i believe my unwanted thoughts came back, while it was slowly vanishing, i just had to stop reassuring myself.
I fear of becoming asexual now ....... After viewing that word in a comment ...... Tell me what to do ... ....... Please ..... I'm really scared a lot
Nano Techy Everyone read my comment.Scroll through the comment sections and you will find my cure.It has actually worked for people(including me🥳🥳)
Nathan. Thanks for these amazing videos. I was an HOCD sufferer myself for years. Spent all day either obsessing or ritualizing. I couldn't even hang out with my best friends without imagining sexual activity with them. I watched gay porn to try to prove that I didn't like it or watched lesbian porn to check my arousal. Must've gotten an answer 10,000 times before I finally decided to trust the treatment. I haven't suffered with it now for over 5 years and if there's one thing I wish I could do it would be to go back in time and just trust the treatment from the outset.
What kind of treatment did you do?
@@fareehamustapha9556 ERP and learning how to meditate
How did that go? I’m considering it
@@ocdmindful618 what is erp dawg I need help man I always liked the girls my head got me f up 💯
@@dacariwhitehead7971 feel you
Bruh I just started dealing with this kind of stuff smh, and I know I’m straight, I have a girlfriend and one day wish to have a family and marry my opposite sex and all that. But it’s just these thoughts of me becoming gay or bisexual gets me into a scared/anxiety/panicky feeling. I was even sweating the other day and couldn’t concentrate for shit. Hopefully it goes away soon. I’m facing it and I remember it happened awhile back ago but not as long as I have it rn (4 days). I know they’re thoughts not feelings but they suck they stress me tf out.
Mario Garcia bruh for real Iam (15) and this shit has happend to me for almost 2 weeks now.ik Iam straight but weird images and the exact question “are you gay”always pop up even when I wake up it’s one of the first things that pop up in my head and it’s stressing tf out of me and I want it to stop and I don’t wanna tell anybody cause ima be judged or looked at differently from my family
Changio yeah bro! I feel you man! I wake up thinking about that shit as soon as my eyes open, matter of fact I feel like it wakes me up sometimes. These are all thoughts though trust, as human beings we identify what we like or are attracted to from a young age, (we don’t choose our identity) it just comes naturally. We’re straight, I believe gay people only fear having to come out the closet in our case we fear more than that we fear what if’s....Give it time little homie don’t be scared just let it pass. Face those thoughts, it’s all mind games. Play them. If they bring you down fuck it it’s all good to cry after being mentally and emotionally drained. what’s been helping me is this “THOUGHTS NOT FEELINGS”
Changio feel free to contact people on websites, I just did some survey and waiting for results a little while ago made me feel a lil better, they have online calls and stuff too where you can speak with professionals about any type of OCD. Shits real out here.
Mario Garcia Thx man I really hope this stuff goes away ima keep that in Ming Thoughts not feelings
Mario Garcia what website can I talk to people Ik I have it from a test I did but I want to talk to somone they online with out having to pay or nun
After stepping into the anxiety and not feeling anxious anymore, theres a feeling that’s like maybe being gay is great. And that really scares me
that’s a backdoor spike! ur getting anxious because ur brain is telling u ur not rly anxious about if
lily s omg this is happening to me rn, how am I going to get out of this
Muda keep going w agreeing with the thoughts and erp, backdoor spikes show growth!
That’s a sign that you are not gay then, the difference is is that you’re scared of it because it’s not what you want therefore you are not homosexual but if you were you would just accept it without giving a single fuck, so I promise you you aren’t gay :)
Haz & Ali ok so the thoughts aren’t giving me nearly as much anxiety anymore and Im scared of that because I don’t know if that’s me accepting I’m gay or something. I still have a loss of attraction which adds onto that fear
I literally have reversed HOCD, came out years before my OCD worsened but somehow I’ve convinced myself I was too young when I came out and that I didn’t know what I really wanted and now I’ve put myself in a stupid situation. My brain knows these are not my thoughts but it’s so easy for them to take over.
i really think i have hocd but i know i’m not lesbian because i’ve only liked guys my whole life and i still do but i don’t know what to do anymore it scares me.
I am so sorry for what you are going through. Finding the therapist can be helpful. I would search on iocdf.org
OCD and Anxiety thanks but does this mean i’m bisexual? or do i have hocd because i really hope it’s just hocd.
@@ericab91806 usually people who are gay know they are gay, and have been gay since they were much younger. so idk if that helps.
@@qayimrahimi4530 it does thanks
Train Wreck no worries Ik how it feels, it’s living hell, Im a straight male, but i have had and sometimes still have the weirdest thoughts. U just gotta learn to live with it for a bit.
I am going though similar issues. What I've asked myself is whether it would help to detach from the need to label myself. It is irrelevant if I am gay or bi or hetero. What matters is a case by case situation, whether I like a certain person. Maybe that could take off some pressure from thinking about labels and bring you back to the here and now with the person you are with? I suppose it should be easier to determine whether you like one particular person than to try to analyze your entire sexuality. What do you guys think?
I’m not feeling any fear or anxiety anymore about these thoughts as I used to but the thought is still there
This means that you're slowly getting over your fear. If you feel disturbed by the visions then you're straight
How did u get rid of the thoughts or feelings
Honestly I've been doing these tips on my own and I'm glad I saw this video cause now I know I'm doing the right thing and I can guarantee it has gotten a bit better but I still have a long way to go
My anxiety over the matter reduced and now my brain is telling me it's true because I'm not that scared anymore 😃. Sometimes I'm even convinced that I'm bisexual/lesbian, but then it wouldn't make sense at all because I don't even want to like a girl. Then my brain would give me thoughts and mental images, because apparently I did question my sexuality before, and I don't even if that's false memory or not.
Hey I like you girl
My insta snr_kageyama
me too, i lost my complete attraction for men due to these thoughts, they're making me convinced im a lesbian even thought ive never thought of myself as one before.
literally yep this
Oh my god, I'm going through almost the exact same thing as you. How are you now? When I am at peace, I would panic because it feels like I am starting to accept that I am bi when I know I'm not, and I also don't want to like girls. I also question my sexuality before but it was mostly because lgbtq+ and coming out videos keep popping up and was everywhere for me. It's so scary, sometimes I just wanna die instead of going through this.
I'm just scared that if I agree with these thoughts it means that my worries were right the whole time and I've just been in denial. I think about it so much now that I'm not even sure what I want anymore, even though I'd never questioned my sexuality (straight) before this
Bro same
@@rellaingonetell1380 we in.the same boat it sucks idk what to do its unlivable
@@JJontiming bruh have you recovered
Have you recovered
Same here and there sucks a lot
This is such a helpful video for OCD in general!! Thank you!
i just wanted to pop in because this deeply affected me years ago and with erp and mindfulness i’ve been free from this for years now
i wanna give support to those because you’re strong enough to beat this
Dude i never have this but im going through antidepressant withdrawal and benzo withdrawal and now im having this
@showtime1235 Can you give any advice? I've been going through it for about 2 - 3 months now and it's just getting worse. I have a boyfriend that I've been with for almost a year now and I love him dearly, but these thoughts and feelings scare me. I used to experiment a bit in my mid teens, but everything just suddenly changed and I didn't want to experiment anymore. I fell head over heels for my current boyfriend, but when I started remembering my mid teenage days, I got anxious and it's spiralled from there. I can't listen to certain songs anymore, I can't watch a lot of movies anymore for fear of being attracted to an actress in it. I'm so frightened and afraid that my relationship with my boyfriend will be ruined. The thing is, I can't even see myself with a woman, but my OCD keeps trying to convince me of things. I'm losing attraction to men now slowly too and it's terrifying. Any advice you can give?
I didn’t think hocd was a real thing I thought I was the only one crazy
Same
Thanks for letting me know I’m not the only one this stuff just appeared out of nowhere during quarantine
Same i hate it
@@_amir_ the only worst part is that I’m starting high school soon and I still don’t know how to handle it that much but we all can do it.
@@julianadelgado2263 wassup that crazy like the lock down made this shit happen I always love girls like why did these weird thoughts come man
@@julianadelgado2263Hi , hope you are doing well now , any updates, u move on right??
I’ve been having hocd for years 😖and my friend just told me she thought I was bi cause of the way I acted around her...
having rly bad anxiety rn 😓😣
everything will be fine, remember this
Ugh don’t be friends with her. I have the same thing cause my friend said I dressed gay. Please please please know ur not alone
@erza rexhallari yeah i guess she was going by a stereotype 😔 thanks
Ignore her
The truth is you will probably lose old friends. I used to be a super outgoing energetic person before OCD and I’ve had just about every theme suffocate my life. HOCD combined with another theme have brought great suffering to my life over the past almost 2 years. Friends have labeled me and I have believed them which has made the whole process even tougher than it should have been. You can’t please everyone if you do you’ll never be happy trust me when I say that because I have tried and it’s made me anxious to a paralyzing level. Be courageous and remember always who you have been I believe those negative voices from our heads (OCD) and other people are of Satan. We must not give them heed or (attention). I hope that OCD is completely gone or almost completely forgotten by now brother. Remember you’re strong and the labels you put on yourself and don’t listen to the lies of the negative voices of others or yourself because they’re simply wrong. Jesus is the light and the life of the world and if your struggling still turn to him because he does provide strength to the meek in heart. ❤️
Some of my biggest fears are:
- Would i become gay in the future.
- Wow i found that person who is my gender as me, attractive so i must like the same gender as me.
- I did something that other gay people do. Does it mean i am gay
- I feel different to others. Does that mean i am now gay bc people will nv like me.
- I also fear it since i am religious. And I realised that even if wasnt religious i still would not like these thoughts.
If you have similar thoughts You arent alone. Also write some of your fears that you have
hi how are you now because i am a boy with similar thoughts
We all should have a what's app group
@@vsg9944yeah 100%, i’ve been having gay intrusive thoughts for 3 weeks now
@@haydensmith-se3iihow are you now??
I’Ve been having hocd for almost four years and I haven’t been to a therapist at all, although I really want to but I am really scared. lately these thoughts have been really convincing almost making me believe it even though I know its not real it’s just been really stressing me out /:
Thanks for sharing your experiences my friend! I hope you can find some relief through your struggles. 😃
water boy my mother says the same thing and i know, but its seems really convincing which makes me doubt and stress about it
@@vaultboy368 easy boy here's the solution watch gay scene from movies don't avoid it and thought say you are say yes i am it will take only four weeks and you done it will go away.
Are you better now? I need help
mel sadly no ): i wish i was
Guys just pray its the devil playing with your just forget everything and tell ur self that u know that ur not gay
And pray
LMFAO GIRL
Can you maybe pray for me? I’m dealing with this now.
Pray for me too
What😂😂 I'm going through this but it's not the devil it's just my mind
Pray doesn’t work, god did not listen to me
i have this and it is insanely disturbing.
i have always liked girls and had crushes on them, ive always been a straight male. Ive also had severe OCD for many years but this form started when the other symptons werent enough for the illness.
sometimes when i see a male i get an terrible anxiety of "what if i get aroused" for example if i see a hot girl i fear "what if i dont get aroused"
this is hell. i love women and find them very attractive and i like being straight, ive done some stupid shit in my life but i dont deserve to go trough this.
if i would be gay i would just kill myself, i could never ever live as that and it would completely erase my self image and standards.
god, if you exist, lend a hand.
i need help.
Dude trust me things will get better also try to stay away from porn and they media because they are overrun by gay people
@@briangarcia4665 bro I'm really scared , iv had HOCD for 2 years now but they got really worse this lockdown , for the past two months and been having anxiety and depression cause of these thoughts and feelings , Iv been straight my whole life I don't why this is happening to me , its as if my sexuality is changing ....cause these days iv been feeling sexually attracted to men and it's making me really depressed , having suicidal thoughts....iv been scared to sleep cause I'm afraid of have dreams about it, bro please help me
life long learner just stay away from social media it’s over run by gay people try to go on long walks and talk about it to a family member or friend also try drawing or working out it helps too
Aye bro. Drop your snap so we can talk cuz I wanna talk to someone who struggled with this
@@Paragon.whyttt alright bet
omg it‘s so calming to know i‘m not the only one, the only difference is i have it the other way round. I‘ve identified as gay for 2/3 years and sometimes i had doubting thoughts but i ignored them.. now over quarantine they just came back but this time never left
Aye bro. Drop your snap so we can talk cuz I wanna talk to someone who struggled with this
@@Paragon.whyttt how are you???
Same
Fighting it is the worst thing you possibly can do. Learning from personal experience, you need to be strong by finding healthy hobbies and alternatives. It will either pass with time or by using exposure therapy. If this doesn’t work, just realize that we are all constantly changing and it’s okay to be different. Don’t beat yourself up, that will only going to make worse.
I have had this since I was a little kid and it’s been super stressful and I couldn’t go to my friends houses or I would throw up. I was always worried I was in denial or that people would think I was homophobic which I definitely am not. It’s been on and off for years now but I’m learning to control my thoughts and it’s getting better:))
@@Löweundju thank you!!
I also developed this in childhood too! I hope you're well.
Did you lose/not develop attraction to the opposite sex due to SOOCD?
Great Job, Nathan. So helpful for clients. Thanks for making these.
Thank you so much! 😃
As someone who was affected by this during 2020 and never thought they’d be able to go days/weeks without this popping into your brain. I’m here to tell you it’s possible. Don’t quit on yourself and find your way through
How can I do that? I’m literally going insane
Same,,, For me it's the idea of getting stressed by just looking at any guys,,, I just started using CBT and now ERP
thanks bestie
I’ve only been battling this for 2 weeks, but I don’t like it at all!! I can’t look at one of my best friends anymore the way I used to without my mind saying, “oo you should like him” I know how sinful those thoughts are, and I go through so many panic attacks with this certain ocd. I use to have suicidal ocd, but that went away in 3 months, it was hard though. I want to live my life for God and not be gay or else I can’t preach the Gospel. I’m dealing with so much right now and I’m only 12 almost 13. Please help me, I know God will also, but this is hard. You are such a great guy with all of these videos they are so awesome. Have a great day.
Hey! I’m 12 almost 13 too and I’m a girl. I had the same issue. It’s pretty much over but it still lingers. I have some coping methods for you that might work.
First:
Remember that these thoughts arent real. Its a voice in your head that wants you to be sad and anxious.
Next:
Think of worse casinario. Say you are gay. There’s nothing wrong with that! Some of my best friends are gay, and they’re awesome people.
Finally:
Distract yourself. Try doing exercise or a fun activity that you enjoyed before HOCD. It will help. If I think of anything else I’ll edit the comment.
Also if you think of it as a sin, that’s just horrible and you should learn to accept gay people for who they are. They’re normal people just like me and you. Being homophobic will not cure this
Anna Lee, thank you so much for you kind words! I turned 13 yesterday, and it all seemed to go away after I was exposed to one of my best friends! God bless you, and I don’t at all hate Gay or lgbtq people. I don’t agree or promote it, but that’s why God gave us free will. Have a nice day!
@@jonathans.219 so has it gone away for you because I’m suffering from it and I’m hoping it’ll go away
@@dylankeeley7529 it sometimes comes again, but very rarely. I’m so sorry this takes such a huge toll in you. I’ll pray for you.. and the thoughts aren’t sinful because you sometimes can’t control it, remember, temptation is not a sin... it’s what you do with it. Yes, this is not a temptation, but remember that. God bless you, you can do this.
at the beginning of the video I even compulsively asked if I liked you, It pissed me off hahaha then I say yes man your godamm gorgeous HAHA.
wait.
Haha! This gave me a good laugh! 🤪
@@ocdandanxiety I have a question if you actualy see this. I check facial and body features often and genualy prefer females in both cases and find nothing atractive on males but the visions just keep popping up. That's CDO right?
SnikerPiker yes
Bro same i had a thought that i liked his voice or that it sounds like he's moaning but then i told myself that's disgusting and not true I'm really thankful for finding out I'm not the only one abd also it's not a huge issue; also I'm gonna start praying and talking to More girls because being around girls helps me; and also makes me a little more comfortable; also I'm Muslim so i would never be gay; even if that's how i feel i hope you guys don't judge me for this, but I'm also really terrified wanna marry a girl and have kids I'm really sad 😢😢
@@RamseyIssaI had the same exact thought you had
I remember how I almost committed a suicide because of having OCD even not knowing i have OCD... It is such a relief knowing that there are many people who are having the same problems and that im not the only one...
You broo you gonna get thought this g , just know patience is key 🔑
@@theyruth3276 thanks bro, acceptance and only acceptance of the thoughts we are suffering from as a part of ourselves is going to make everything brighter than yesterday👌
@@davidkrasovskis6458 hello ?
Hi, I’m a 15 year old female.
I have been struggling with this for almost 2 years I think. It all started when me and my best friend were skateboarding and my best friend wanted to try a new trick or something and she asked me to hold her hand to keep balance. So I did and I thought I felt something like a feeling in my chest. I told her and she told me it was probably nothing. (Oh btw my best friend is lesbian) So that’s when I began to ask myself. “Am I bi?” I asked my mom what she thought and she said the feeling I felt was probably just affection or something like that I can’t think of the right word right now. Like she’s my best friend so of course I love her as a friend. But then I soon began to question if I had feelings for a different friend. I always thought she was pretty but I wouldn’t want to date her or kiss her or anything. And yeah I didn’t have feelings for this different friend. So when quarantine started my HOCD dialed down a lot. But then in December 2020 a ex friend I had over 2 years ago called me and apologized for shit she did to me and she admitted that she used to have a crush on me (she’s bi) I felt uncomfortable but flattered when she told me she had a crush on me before. I really don’t want to talk about this call we had. It was a horrible night and I’ve never faced so much anxiety in my life before then. So basically long story short she asked me out. And had anxiety running through my body so bad I was shaking all over. And I felt anxiety even like in my vagina area… and I thought I was aroused since I felt things down there. And I told her I felt things down there and she told me that I was horny. I was not at all horny… I was anxious. My mom told me (after the call with my ex friend) it’s normal to feel anxiety down there. But at that time I was convinced I was horny when I really wasn’t. And that’s where my HOCD got really bad. Btw I said no when she asked me out and I blocked and never spoke to her again. After that I kept getting intrusive thoughts I hate, that just kept coming back and they still happening to this day as I’m writing this. I know I like men but woman I really don’t think I do. I’m 99% sure I’m straight, I have never been attracted to a woman before. I’ve had 2 boyfriends in the past even. But yeah that’s my story.
My Symptoms I’m having:
I get intrusive repeating gay thoughts that really make me question how I feel about them and question myself. And I REALLY want them to just Disappear.
I get anxiety attacks every time I have a sleepover with a female. I even had one when I was at my female cousins house.
EWW
(no i’m not from Alabama do not make stupid jokes please)
Sometimes when I’m already aroused because of a man. I think- “what if that was a girl instead? How would you feel?” And then my brain gives me an image I don’t not want to see. And the intrusive thoughts come back.
Sometimes I think a girl I see on tiktok or something is pretty and I think harder about it. And the intrusive thoughts come back of course.
Sometimes when I get these images they really don’t affect me, I feel no anxiety. I think I’m just used to it. But I still hate these thoughts and images.
But other times they do affect me. Sometimes I feel a feeling in my vagina area and I cant tell if I’m aroused or stressed. I feel stressed but it’s because I can’t tell what I feel sometimes. I’m pretty sure it’s all stress but idk… Like I don’t feel aroused but my brain is like “well why did you feel that feeling in your vagina then hm??” IDK IM STRESSED THATS WHY MAYBE BRAIN!
Edit: one more thing, idk the reason why I fear of being gay. I know my family and friends would accept me and still love me the same. I just fear being gay for some reason… I’ve always been attracted to men and I hope to always be attracted to only men. That’s it I guess… It’s not just me like that right? Please tell me
I think I probably need a therapist. So hopefully I get one eventually. Sorry I wrote so much and if you read that all of this, thank you so much for listening!
It makes me feel so much better that I’m not alone with this and I feel a lot better right now typing and telling my story.
We are in this together and we will get through it!!
girl i am going through the EXACT SAME THING. i’ve dealt with hocd in the past, around quarantine last year. it started because a lot of my friends started coming out as bi and we’re pressuring me because i was probably the only straight person there. i got over it, but after school started again the anxiety and stress i had last year returned as well. what happened about two weeks ago, was i was walking home with a friend on my bus who i usually walk home with and there was another person with us. i got off the bus last and they were waiting for me and she called me attractive and my friend said she was gay. at first i was flattered but then when i got home i thought why did i like that compliment? does that make me gay? i kept stressing about it for the whole day. then today i was sitting with a friend in class (she is straight) and we were just talking like normal. we always talked about school work and boys and pretty casual things. she leaned on my shoulder and i got nervous but not because i felt attracted to her in any way, it was because im usually not used to touch so i was like oh ok. this is going to sound stupid but then she looked at me and said im going to steal you from your shawty (she’s talking about a boy i have a crush on) and i jokingly said nooooooo, but then she said “oh come on you know you want to i can see you blushing” and all the anxiety came back. i didn’t know i was blushing and it wasn’t because i liked her, like i said i just don’t get physical touch that often. after she said that all the stress and anxiety came rushing back in and all i want is for the thoughts to go away. i am also a 15 year old female and the exact same things happening to you happen to me. whenever i see a pretty girl on tiktok or any platform i think omg she’s so pretty i wish i looked like her or something, but i feel like in the back of my head there’s a voice telling me i like her or that i’m attracted to her. also the same thing you feel in your private area is normal as well. it’s called groinal response, and it’s not you being horny. it is because all the anxiety causes a lot of blood flow in that area (especially if it’s hocd) and it can make you think you are horny.
Same here sister and I know i like women but men I really don't think i do! I too 100% sure I'm straight and I have never been attracted to a men before! I've never had a girl friend in my past but yeah that's my story! Sorry for copying your words it's more relateable to me #Wearestraight
@@bunnylo4f222 sorry I’m seeing your comment so late but your comment makes me SO HAPPY! Your comment made me feel so much less alone… thank you so much for replying and reading my story! Thank you so so so much!! You made my night😊
@@exolsadie3746 hi how are you?
thank you so much for sharing this. you’re going through the same thing i am. i’m here for you.
Sometimes I'll accidentally say "I'm gay" Instead of "I'm straight" and then I stop for a second and I'm like wait why did I say that omg!!
so truee and then you suddenly overthink for like the whole day already.
@@jaylagrier5117 did you get over it tho?
@@jaylagrier5117 good to know that you can deal with it :>> goodluck
I thought I was the only one. Thanks for putting my words down 🤣😭
@@jaylagrier5117 what did you say
I'm a 17 year old girl, and I've always had a thing for tomboy stuff. Like, I've always preferred short hair and the kind of jackets guys wear than dresses and makeup and all those 'girly' stuff. If my country weren't a very conservative one, I'd probably be a tomboy myself. Ok. So I was watching this music video a couple of weeks ago, and the lead singer was a girl, just the kind of girl I'd like to be, like all black shirt and jeans and short hair and slamming on her guitar. I couldn't take my eyes off of her. At the same time I was terrified...I was like, "Why am I staring at her? Why do I find her so attractive? Does this mean I'm gay?" And that's how it all started.
I was desperately trying to figure out the answer in the weeks that followed. First I tried taking online quizzes and all to find out my true sexual orientation. However, it made me all the more terrified. I started to visit psychology websites then. I found some articles that convinced myself that it's actually hocd and that I'm not in denial. For a couple of days I almost felt like I was completely ok. But then it just came back again. I was constantly questioning myself again, "How do you know it's hocd? How can you be sure? Maybe you're gay and not ready to accept it just yet." Maybe I'd be watching a movie and my brain would be like, "Why do you think this girl is beautiful? Why are you not looking at the guy? Aren't you supposed to look at the guy? You know what it means, you're definitely gay!"
I've always thought I was mostly straight until this happened, but there were always some doubts lurking in the corner. That because I used to watch gay porn when I was, like, 13 and found it quite stimulating. But I never really thought about having an actual relationship with a girl. The thought has always repulsed me and made me uncomfortable. I don't watch porn anymore though. I quit watching it a year or so ago and soon it lost all its charms for me. I now think that it's completely gross, and regret having watched it multiple times before.
I've never been in a relationship, but I've always had crushes on male movie stars and singers. But now I just can't get this obcession of being gay out of my head. Please, please help me out.
( Sorry for my bad English ; I'm not a native. )
Its because the thing we think a lot about in our mind makes it that thought centered.you may have noticed that the thing we avoid most and to not think about it makes it more prominent and upclosed thought and then ocd springs forth and overtakes this whole process and makes you wanna think about it again and again.you just have to be aware whenever this thought come and one more thing is that you cannot fight thoughts it like fighting a ghost that doesn't even exist.so you make yourself aware whenever thought come by and it will itself go if you stop applying logistics to it
Hope you'll feel better
If you wanna ask anything you can ask me here or on Instagram
Omg same , so i have always liked boys , infact i had a huge crush on bts , but because i look boyish sometimes and sometimes i look girlish , most people started to assume i was bisexual, i kept telling them I'm straight as hell , until my friends brought it up that i always complimented girls more , and i only did that because that how i want to look like , i want to look like girls i compliment , but my friends tried to put it in my head that i was bisexual after saying severally i wasn't, that's how it started, i kept on thinking on and on , started panicking when i saw girls , staring at girls picture too much trying to figure out if i was actually into them , creating scenarios in my head that got me turned on and i started to panick real bad , normally i don't have time for boys , that made me think of maybe its because I'm into girls and then i start to panick that what?? ,now I'm scared to resume ,what if i start staring at my roommate and she freaks out , i don't want to feel like this at all , its soo disturbing, but i was never into girls before nor found them attractive in that way. I need help
@@sunshine-wz1gd you are straight girl dont mind those stupid thoughts even iam also straight
@@sunshine-wz1gd how are you?
Your videos are saving my life right now (not suicidal).
I have recently started on my journey of taking back control of my life. Quitting weed, taking responsibility for where I currently am in life etc.
I was most recently in a 5 month long relationship with a woman who I genuinely LOVE, she is/was my best friend.
I have currently been suffering a bit of ED due to anxiety, unemployment, single parenting full-time....the list could go on. With so much going on in my life, focusing on sex with her was the furthest thing on my mind. This caused to downward spiral into what I am currently going to call HOCD thanks to these videos of yours.
I have broken down into tears multiple times seeing as how I realize how much work there is to do and how I may have possibly jeopardized my best relationship so far because of this...
I look forward to meeting with a therapist immediately to help talk back control of my thoughts so that at 31 years of age, I don't have to fear living with intrusive thoughts no matter what they may be for much longer
Hey bro, how are you doing?
Just talking about the treatment makes me get a cold sweat
the hardest part is knowing you have hocd but then a thought comes up trying to tell me that people are just trying to take me away from my true sexuality and that i need to accept it
My son is suffering from this since he was 8 yrs old he’s now 15 and it’s still affecting him 😭I hateeeee it so much I hate seeing my son unhappy 🙁 he went from being this outgoing,brave , outspoken funny child to a cold turkey he don’t even want to hang with his friends .I’ve tried everything I just need help it’s stressing me out so bad I begged god to give it to me and let him be free from this .every time I ask him about it he gets very angry with me but I can I look at his face and tell when he’s worrying 😭😭😭
Hope he gets better.
I would like to give some advice, during these times things are very tough and some ppl can have things like this happen to them out of nowhere. The first thing you need to understand is having intrusive thoughts about being gay or litteraly about anything that give you anxiety does not automatically mean you have OCD. OCD is a disorder and a lot of you probably don't have it. If you want to know what to do to get rid of anxious thoughts the answer is simple, do nothing. Continue living your life on your own terms, do what you like doing and I can't stress enough when I tell you to not search things up on the internet. Sure you will get anxiety, sure those thoughts are bothering you but just continue living life, don't engage in compulsions. I promise you that at some point it will just stop bothering you and you're gonna laugh about it and ask yourself what the hell were you thinking.
Thank you.
Why doesn't it say this at all on the internet it's so annoying
Guys I had this, but thank God it passed. I hope it never starts again. I now understand that I had because I was overthinking everything, and all of a sudden I got that intrusive thought, “what if I am gay.” It was just fear and anxiety. I myself wasn’t sure if I am really like that or am I just confused about something. I preyed to God that I don’t turn out that way, and thanks to him, I am ok right now. I am a feminine girl, I like guys, dresses, makeup, long curly hair, and woman’s perfumes. Thank God everything passed, and I am not like that.
How did you recover
@@pskuchiha3665 I distracted myself from that thought, then I started to take care of my apperarce, and make myself look feminine again, since at that time I was getting stressed in 8th grade, and stress made me forget about my femininity. Then I used logic and evidence to determine if I am really gay or not. Then I suddenly became attracted to a guy I saw. I used my imagination to get rid of those stupid thoughts, about me being like that. I imagined myself in the beautiful mountains and fields sitting there with the dress of my dreams and looking at the nature. After couple of months it just passed and everything came back to normal.
Happy for yuh :)
I maybe straight or i am be BI , i just randomly starting gaving gay thoughts this all started with a gay dream i started overthinking about whether i am gay or not and kept thinking about it read a whole bunch of articles and videos on it (i honestly don't want to be gay) but rather than thinking and getting anxious about it, i might just accept that i could be bi atleast i won't stress about me being gay and i will be able to concentrate on think i like and not lose myself in the process
how are you now??
"Intrusive thoughts just keep coming, and coming, and coming, and coming, and coming"
Coming and coming and coming
Thanks for that.
What sucks about this is that my brain tells me that my anxiety is a sign of attraction or my "true" desire. It pains me to be fighting myself but i only manage to minimize the compulsions and mental checking but it still stresses me out. I just want this to be gone
Your intrusive thoughts want you to believe the worst thing possible. Having anxiety is NOT your “true desire” this is a very common thought in HOCD. if you’re repulsed by the idea, don’t even give energy into believing it
HOCD also affects persons who identify as gay, but obsess about being straight. Ive been one of these sufferers. I really wish this was at least mentioned in these videos.
Same here!
straight is great brother
It's totally different for straight people experiencing this.
So i have been currently been fighting hocd i mean i know i'm straight i've always have been, I remember these thoughts happened when i been seeing alot of people coming out on social media and then a thought popped up in my head "What if your Bi?" and that scared the shit out of me, its been months and i've been improving cuz whenever that thought randomly pops up i don't really get scared anymore its like i'm used to it already and whenever that thought pops up like what i said earlier I always talk back like "I know i am straight so shut up" but the thought still keeps popping up.
same. but its just a thought you're not your brain it doesn't define you
the brain can be your worst enemy or your best friend you just have to take control of it and be the boss
Same, you ever stare at someone your gender and u feel weird and your brain says "YOURE GAY" that just messed up i dont know anymore man
@@alliwantisyounknow158 ME but you know deep down inside that your straight but this happens
@@whambam849 Ikr it's so messed up
Same shit happened to me
So first,i'm a female artist and my friend said all these girl artists gay af (i'm speaking without any homophobia,dont get me wrong)
So i started to worry what if i'm too
I'm straight,I'm into men,and I had 4 boyfriends before
Yet everytime I looked at my friends I thought I will turn into gay. I got panicked several times,that what if I will become bi or a lesbian from looking at other women or when I hugged my mother my brain almost made me coming out(???) I also got other ocd symptoms such as these long routines and very bad intrusive thought about like everything (for example when i sat in a car i suddenly got the thought of jumping out)
I also had horrible days when I just kept telling myself in the mirror "I'm not into women" and "I like men" then my brain said these thoughts are fake then i said "i'm into women" and it felt total wrong and I knew its not true
Then I found out about OCD and HOCD,and when the things went absolute hell (panic attacks daily,anxiety,and not being able to get up) I wrote a story on instagram about my mental state and I met a fellow friend with Ocd and she said she had very similar symptoms
Now i'm scrolling this section and I see many people with same symptoms,and I know what's going on after all the sufferings
I'm sorry for writing all this out,but now i finally got a glimpse of hope
Stay strong all of u
Pray to god for this.
@43_Sumit Dey_1205 you will! Ask god but also speak with your own words and declare in Jesus name. Bible says that god has given us power to destroy the works of the evil one. So if you simply say in the name of Jesus these thoughts I rebuke you and have real faith , the thoughts will go I promise you
@43_Sumit Dey_1205 make sure you have forgiven everyone in your heart so god forgives you too and so can work in your life
@43_Sumit Dey_1205 I’ll be praying for you too
@@kobevandeputte1622 plz pray for me I don’t want to be gay but I feel like this thoughts are changing me I never liked boys I always liked girls but when I see a good looking guy I get worried and I also take test online to see if im gay or straight and also sometimes look at people to see if I like them or not plz pray for me I don’t want to be gay
@@kobevandeputte1622 this thoughts are changing me
I am 50 years old and I’ve had OCD since I was a kid. I think it’s wonderful what you’re doing and you were so right on target with everything you say! When I was younger I had more of the touching a certain amount of times and rituals but as I entered my 20s I went into intrusive thoughts and it’s funny because I went through a short period of having pretty much every when you went through. I do take medicine But I also try to avoid triggers which seems to make my OCD worse.
@@chetansonare6346
You can ask me anything anytime you want. I had OCD as I might’ve said since I was a kid but then it was more of rituals and having their check the door 100 times literally, I had a certain number I had to touch the wall or do something else that same number of times because if I didn’t something bad would happen so I thought. I mean it took years out of my life and the funny thing it’s kind of easy to hide in school light sometimes going to the bathroom. Turning on and off the light with all that kind. Do you know nothings going to happen but it’s not what if, and you have to do it until it just feels right to you. So I will be honest when I probably got about to being 18 that’s with a turned into the exact OCD that you’re talking about with the intrusive thoughts. What if I’m in church and I yell out the F Word. What if I just went and pushed somebody into traffic. What if nobody likes me what if everybody thinks I’m rude and I would be in such anxiety I would do anything for a leaf I would call my grandmother and say, am I mean do you think I mean and she would be like no what are you talking about and I have to just keep calling people until I felt OK about it. I know I looked like an idiot but I just had to get that relief.
@@chetansonare6346 I worried what if I was a lesbian. There’s just so many more I could just keep on telling you and you’d be surprised if you got some books about it so many people that have the intrusive thoughts OCD will have the exact same scenario as things you said you’re worried about. A very popular one is if you’re in church what if you do something really bad. Another one my brother has it really bad one time he thought he ran over somebody and killed them it turned out it was just a bump in the road but he was late to work because he kept driving to go work and he was saying oh my god what if I did hit somebody, now deep in our minds as you know he knows he didn’t but nobody can tell you that it’s crazy, so he went back and checked it was fine then he did it another time. So he was late to work and what do you say to your boss I thought I ran somebody over. I mean sometimes it when I can tell her crazy stories and laugh now but the funny thing is that exact story I’ve found in two OCD books or somebody thought they ran over somebody. It’s just again everybody tells me stop overthinking that’s what I’m told so much. If I think I hurt somebody’s feelings forget about it I’m a wreck! One thing that always helped me and it doesn’t make sense end it was like something my doctor had told me, I think it was my first visit to her when I was 23 and I said to her but if I’m a psychopath or what if I’m crazy and she said Lisa people that are crazy don’t know they’re crazy. So try to remember that if that’s one of your fears sometimes. And also know that most of our OCD worries the intrusive that worries I really just our worst fears that we know would be so wrong and not normal to do. Anything that would be to the extreme of being abnormal we fear oh my god what if that’s us or what if that happens to me. Like I said I know the answer a lot I know like what time I said oh my god what if I grow up and I’m gonna be a child molester. Now I know I’m not but then as you said you overthink and you’re mind just goes. I’m sorry if this is too long. To this day every time my head hit stop pillow to go to sleep at night my mind just starts going I have to take a sleeping pill to help me sleep. And yes the over thinking I’m sure people have said to you why do you care what they think or why are you worrying about that so much because. Yes they are right we are over thinking some silly stuff but they don’t get that we cannot help it! Sometimes my overthinking it’s about real stuff that has happened. Like when I found Out my son was doing pot oh my God I knew nothing about it I never really did pot. I was a disaster I’m thinking oh my god is he going to do this drug necks or that drug next. And why is he doing it is it because of me what did I do wrong oh my God maybe I cry too much in front of the kids and I just beat myself up. Now like I said all mothers worry about their kids and all people worry about things that you should maybe wonder orally about but people like you and I take it to a whole Nother level and instead of worrying about it for 15 minutes or an hour we could worry about it for months just until the next thing pops up to worry about. But I will tell you medicine always helped me a lot ! I was first put on Prozac and it literally pretty much put the OCD in remission for like 10 years but then my body got used to that so I had to try another one then so on and so on. I will let you know yes you can get married and have kids. I’m 50 years old and I have two kids my son is 24 and my daughter is 23. I have heard of people that say they never could get married because they would not expect somebody to put up with them. So I guess that would ask depend on how severe your OCD is. Even so when I say it goes until like a remission still have it I still overthink but not as much and I’m able to let go of things much easier and quicker but if something triggers it then it’s a disaster. I may be all over the place and again I just I’m writing a lot because I want to tell you a lot. I’m not sure if you do go to a psychiatrist if you don’t I would highly recommend one I would also tell you do not be scared of medicine And a lot of them you can get side effects from but usually within a month the side effects go away. A lot of people don’t believe that and they refused to take medicine. I was doing very well for a while and just recently I had a Bad time with the OCD and the sad thing is of my friends and my family try to help me etc. but they could only take so much. And I was starting to worry I was gonna make my family or my own kids not want to be around me because I was just asking than the same questions over and over. And I can see how that could be annoying and there’s really nothing anybody can tell you until you yourself are able to get that feeling of letting it go or feeling that it’s OK or it’s just right now. So what I tried to start doing is trying my hardest not to ask any family members and friends questions anymore like my latest thing was are you scared to let your kids drive with me do you think I’m gonna get in an accident. And some before like where the hell did you get this from and why are you asking that and as you know you can’t believe it explain to them why you’re having this fear for you’re over thinking something stupid. Like maybe my sister said one day oh wow you drive fast sometimes. Most people would laugh it off. But not someone with OCD. I automatically got the pit in my stomach how did anxiety attack of course and then just kept asking everybody I know do you think I drive really bad Ect. So anyway I’m trying to save questions that I know are going to annoy somebody and just save them all from my doctor when I see her. I mean she’s at least she’s getting paid to get annoyed LOL. But I also tried this I tried because it is usually especially bad at night to write down my worry or what I was overthinking and I said in my head OK I’m not throwing it away I’m not dismissing it it’s still there but I’m gonna worry about it we’ll discuss it with my doctor tomorrow or the next day. And you know what was happening I would wake up the next morning and look at what I wrote and I was like oh my God why was I even thinking about that. It was so weird it actually helped and I wasn’t even worrying about it. People say you could also write down what your fear is or what you’re only thinking, write it down on a piece of paper crumble it up and just throw it in your closet or throw it in a basket and save yourself OK i’m not letting it go I’m just gonna worry about it tomorrow and you’ll be surprised you’re going to look at those papers and say oh my God! Unfortunately even somebody that Has OCD cannot take away your anxiety that you’re having with whatever you’re having at that time. I can tell you don’t be so rude all you’re worrying for no reason. But the best anybody can do for you was just be there to listen. And it does help when you talk to other people that suffer from OCD. But when that anxiety it hits I mean I can’t eat the butterflies in my stomach are horrible I almost Felt like I couldn’t function at some times in my life. And again the only relief is when you finally get it on your own or if you say by Rory was oh my God Is my boyfriend going to leave me? And just as dad OCD overthinking worry it’s it’s like a Lightning bolt body in two seconds of complete anxiety but then I know if I go and I see my boyfriend and I say oh my God do you still like me do you still wanna go out with me and she says of course I do I love you more than anything, within seconds it’s the best really sure the world things I need to goes away. But sometimes it’s not as simple as that and a lot of people don’t understand the crazy fears that we have. I always said I want to do speeches on this because I believe a lot of kids probably killed them selves not knowing what the hell they have or what to do. I’ll say another thing unfortunately SSRI drugs which are the usual medicines that help OCD can affect especially a man’s sexual activity and a lot of them stopped taking the medicine because of that. I have a shirt I should show you the picture of it. Shows with an arrow is a complete cycle of the OCD I think it’s a Sutton like worry then anxiety then relief or something like that. But I am a a extreme believer in medicine for OCD! Yes I did just learn that some of those little things can help like I just told you. And I also find that when things are going good in my life and I’m happy that OCD is lessened. Please don’t be afraid to go to the psychiatrist believe me there’s nothing that you can tell her if that’s gonna make her think you’re crazy or anything like that. And sometimes an SSRI like say Prozac will bother your sex life but another SSRI like Paxil or Zoloft well it’s trial and error with the medicine. But you got a stick it out at least a month. I would love to help as many people as I can if you have any more questions just ask sorry I went on and on there’s so much more I can say. The tough thing is people don’t understand it because you can’t put a Band-Aid on your brain they can see the cut as if they can see a cut on your knee and no that’s why you’re upset and then they can fix it or they can see if you have cancer and you don’t feel good but we look fine so people just don’t understand how terrible the disease is. OK good luck keep me posted oh and most of all and I mean really most of all avoid your triggers
@@chetansonare6346
Np. All that stuff you mentioned I went through all that worrying too. I was in such a depression one time I didn’t want to get out of my bed for over two months I didn’t want to wake up because every day was a new battle. Every day it’s a new fight. And then I worry about my father and my mother. The biggest thing I guess that really can still get me bad sometimes is worrying about what other people think of me there could be 50 people that say wow you do an awesome job perfect and if one person doesn’t say it I will just focus on that I wonder why that person didn’t say that why doesn’t a person like me. At 48 I was funny getting better at that and able to say will screw them if they don’t like me. Don’t give up ever. I forgot why you said you only took the medicine for a month but if you felt it make you like a zombie or some thing else will try another than another than another. But try that thing like I said try to write it down some people even say the picture of themselves in their head putting The thought or worry on a plate and they’re not throwing the plate away or nothing they’re just gonna push it to the side and worry about that plate tomorrow. Just so you know the SSRI stopped working on me and thank God I’m on gabapentin now and thank God it’s been helping a lot. But yes sometimes I would feel like I’m dreaming I remember being in the mall one time and I felt like everything was having them around me and I kind of wasn’t there but I realize now I was just having a major anxiety attack! Just promise me one thing don’t go listening to what everybody else says because everybody thinks they know everything specially about medicine. Everybody’s different everybody’s body is different everybody’s body reacts different. If you’re open to try medicine I’m telling you sometimes you have to take five different ones till one works! Again good luck and it’s a very rough age it was my roughest age to 22 as a matter fact I kind a really really almost gave up at that time and that’s when I was sent to a doctor and she I say save my life! Good luck
I would also like to add that yes it goes through different themes that was a very very good way of wording it! And just when you finally get past one your faced with another. Mental disease has a long way to go. It’s good you’re talking about it it’s a shame people can’t see it and think oh it’s just in your head or I’ll stop worrying about that my dad I wish it was that easy. If I could be honest OCD probably took up almost half my life maybe if you had enough of hours Iof over thinkingI don’t know. Maybe not that much but don’t give up. And if people don’t want to understand it Screw them. A lot more people have it then you know of so you are not alone! Thank you again for your kind words
@@Chippy88 hi Lisa, hope you're well!
How long did you deal with SOOCD, how old were you? Was your attraction affected?
Thank you so much for this video. As you said, this theme can really take over. But all pure o themes are excruciating for me. The more meaning I attach to them, the longer they stick. Working on facing the fear.
about a year ago i went through this. i wasn’t able to sleep at night and i would have so much anxiety that i would feel like throwing up. i got over it thankfully over some time but then something happened today. i was walking with some friends home and this new person started walking with us who is a girl. she said i was really pretty and at first i said thank you but they told me she was gay. i’m not a homophobic person and i didn’t think much of it at first, in fact i thought it was genuinely nice that she complimented me but then they said she said that because she thought i was gay because i “looked fruity”. i started freaking out when i got home and the whole cycle went on again just like last year. i know i’m not gay, i’ve been a hetero all my life and was never interested in a girl, but i’ve been getting a lot of anxiety recently again which led me back to this video. i know it’s weird that this one comment affected me, but after that entire conversation while walking home i really wish it didn’t happen. if anyone can help me i appreciate it :(
Same like someone today at school a random person called me a faggot and I think he was trying to act tuff and cool but I hate when they say stuff like that to me and i think to myself what if I am gay and im worried I don’t want to be gay
I’m a homosexual and every single day since the beginning of the coronavirus pandemic, I swear to you I’ve been feeling the same way everyone else in this comment section has felt. It’s also those what if’s that trap you and then the thoughts don’t leave your mind. I’m the beginning it came in waves, now it’s everyday. I hate this.
Hi! I have very similar situation. How are you now? How is your OCD?
I’ve never spoken about this before but out of nowhere my brain started convincing myself I was not straight, and I'm pretty sure I am straight! I’ve never had a crush on a girl - I only look up to people that I care about. But sometimes I get these unwanted thoughts trying to convince myself that I’m gay or bi when the thought of that makes me unhappy and uncomfortable. I don’t want to be gay or bisexual, I’m not homophobic and I fully suppport the LGBTQ+ community but that’s not what I want in my life. These thoughts have stopped me from having real feelings for a guy because everytime I even think about it these intrusive thoughts come back to me. Out of nowhere today my brain started asking if I was transgender today when I know full well I absolutely am not and I have no idea where it came from, but it’s like I can’t get rid of these thoughts no matter how much I tell myself it’s not real. I’m not comfortable with the thought of being with a girl, I’ve only ever had a crush on a guy and I’m happy being a girl myself. But sometimes there’s like girls I’m really friendly with and I really like them (platonically) but my brain will be like “you like them”. But like - deep down I know I don’t? I don’t know. Is something wrong with me? I have never been diagnosed with any kind of OCD but I’ve always struggled with overthinking absolutely everything in my life. Like if I do something stupid I’ll convince myself that everyone hates me. It feels like I can’t control my mind, and that it’s not up to me how I feel. I can’t talk to my family because I’d be uncomfortable and this is the closest I’ve ever gotten to talking about it. What should I do? Is something wrong with me. I’m only 15 should I be feeling like this?
The thought of not being straight makes me want to cry because all I've ever been is straight and that's all I want to be. It's like my brain is trying to hurt me but it's a battle between my brain and mine. Please help me :(
@Lis K. but it's like i know im not and I dont want to be, the thought makes me really upset and stressed. i know they're just intrusive thoughts and it's normal i just want it to go away!! :(
@Lis K. you're right!!! I've always been straight, it's just because of quarantine im not able to see anyone so I'm starting to forget how i feel i think. that, social media trying to force me into stereotypes by how i dress and act and also my mind that likes to wildly overthink everything!! i am an lgbt ally but I'm happy the way I am and I don't want to be anything other than straight and my brain is very self destructive which is why I think it tries to make me feel crap about myself. i cant help always stressing and worrying about it even tho deep down I know, sure I've only ever liked boys but all of a sudden my brain is trying to tell me that because i think a girl is pretty it means i 'like' here when really it's just me being able to appreciate how they look! im just trying to get past the constant stress and worry about it and social media really does it's best to make me feel rubbish about myself which doesnt help. it's just very stressful because ive been happy the way i am and this is not helping my mental health!
(I do support lgbg tho - im just happy the way ive always been and i dont want it to chance because i know deep down in straight if that makes sense??)
@Lis K. how long did it take you to get rid of these thoughts?? its normal right?? itll go away wont it? it's so stressful for me its ruining every thought i have and I dont really know what to do
@Lis K. you've helped me in more ways than I can explain just by saying that. it's like when i see a gay couple normally it wouldnt phase me but now im like because i dont get uncomfortable seeing an lgbt relationship or I ship an lgbt relationship in a show does that mean im not straight?? is it normal to question it only to conclude that you are straight? am I normal for worrying over this??
@Lis K. you know what, you're so right!! i think it's just tiktok etc pressuring me into thinking everyday thoughts I have mean something else. thank you so much you made me feel so much better!!!
Understand everyone it’s is just the ego hurt by these intrusive thoughts and that’s what’s builds the fear of it don’t fight with the ego wit will trick u that it’s helping your but it will just end in a loop of overthinking and trying to re gain re assurance of your sexuality just let go of the fear if you know you don’t desire any of the things your thinking and move forward don’t fight the thoughts let them be you are not your thoughts no matter how much they can trick you look in the mirror and tell yourself how you truly feel about yourself then everything will come back together trust me ☀️
See, I’ve been going through what I think is HOCD for about 2 or 3 months now and I’m so afraid, distressed, keep thinking to myself “You have to be in denial” constantly searching google for stuff and I think that what I find just makes my problems worse because I can’t find things that fit exactly how I feel, except this video. What my issue is, I have done a couple things in the past that would make me seem at least bisexual but I have an explanation for it. About 2 years ago I dated a girl. I didn’t feel love for her I felt like I was just doing it she felt like a friend. We dated for 3 months I think and I couldn’t wait for us to break up and when we did I said to myself “finally” out loud. But see I don’t know if I have attraction or not just because of my flashbacks to some things I’ve said and done just make me doubt my heterosexuality. I’m not even questioning, I’m just playing games with this thing. I know how I feel deep down I’m straight but on the surface is all this panic, doubt and worry. I see a woman and then I think to go back and go “How do you feel about her?” “Were you attracted? You watched this video two times that must mean…” Constant constant constant. Leave me alone. I did the exposure and response before without even knowing about it and I got over my anxiety but I was still obsessing over the thoughts, and now the anxiety is coming back. Last night I heard someone say you have to tell yourself “I am gay” “I do like the same sex” to get passed this. I thought that meant get passed the denial and accept your emotional attraction. Nah I was crying saying “I’m not gay what” and then I realized he meant to accept he thoughts are there and tell it to shut up. Which I’ve been trying but the intrusive thoughts keep going on and on. What do I do? I just wish there were a magic pill. I’ve liked men always and only until I start doubting myself. I’m 14 and I don’t want to go through this tomorrow or in 10 years.
Me to🥺 are you feeling better? I’ve been dealing with this for 2 months.
@@hattiemcleanx hey how are you doing?
@@hattiemcleanxhow are you now? i’ve been going through gay intrusive thoughts for 3 weeks
So if i was straight befor the thoughts that means I’m straight even with the thoughts?
Yes, you are still straight.
@@hatersgottahatewejustgotta198 finally some peace of mind
@@hatersgottahatewejustgotta198 oh thank god
Yeah!
Your thoughts can't change who you are
Fu*k this ocd man its making me doubt If I was. But I know I was!!
Thank you very much. This problem can cause other psychiatrical problems like depression, which I had 4 times, I've had hocd for many years. Sometimes it gets better and I even think that I'm cured, sometimes it gets worse. I think you are right, it has to be treated cause time alone doesn't make it go away.
What's sad is the lack of awareness surrounding this subject. Most people don't even realise they have this and just boil it down to denial.
I totally agree!
I’m bisexual so my ocd attacks me thinking “ what if I’m lesbian “ I’ve only been with guys and I’m currently in a healthy relationship. Ive gone through CBT and I’ve made progress with that but I’ve been dreading ERP, but I know I have to do it, so thank you for the tips.
I relate although I’m gay thinking “what if I was straight”. I’ve only had major crushes on boys since I was a kid but I didn’t know what that was cause I was like 8 but when I would listen to love songs a boy would always be there with me. Until COVID 19 hit, it’s a nightmare to not do anything at all but be caught up in your thoughts and doubts. I’m also VERY close friends with a girl and a lot of people believe that we are dating, so my brain tells me, “what if you did? What if you liked her? What if you kissed her in the car that one day? What if she’s your soulmate.” As a result, I kinda dread when she texts me or I interact with you. In addition, I began avoiding heterosexual AND homosexual images of casual relationships because 1. Im scared that the heterosexual visual might cause me to think “I want that....” and for homosexual visual to be “Why don’t I like it?? WHY DONT I REACT TO IT DIFFERENTLY? IM GAY I SHOULD LIKE THIS... THIS MEANS IM NOT GAY THEN.” As I type this, I know what im saying but my brain keeps doubting the sincerity of my words. As I was watching this video, not surprisingly my brain kept telling “what if what he is saying is NOT true.” Even tho I tell myself it’s true I need help but my brain says otherwise. It’s a nightmare.
@@Andres.bh04 did it get better?????
Thiisss! my brain also makes me feel like I don't like boys anymore, or trying to convince me I will be uncomfortable in a relationship whit a boy, and I know that's not true, but I feel my brain it's like possessed
My anxiety and luck is so bad i feel because of this HOCD I am getting random feeds instagram and other social media such as people accepting gay or bisexual or lgbt which is popping up my anxiety too much.
Somehow I feel the main reason for anxiety is social media .
Same! Since then more pride month feeds have been showing up . It enrages me to the core.... it's not that I hate them or anything... I'm happy if they're happy....but it's still frustrating
And when I have it, it’s usually when I haven’t seen boys for a while. It’s just, this is the worst it’s ever been BY FAR. Edit: I’m doing so much better now and I’m almost cured
SnikerPiker thank you, I feel better because I only want to kiss guys and the thought of sex with girls makes me wanna cry. You helped a lot and I appreciate it. And when I say I’m gay, it feels like I’m lying to myself.
SnikerPiker lots of straight men watch gay porn but are not sexually attracted to men sexuality is more than who you’re sexually attracted to
Safi Abdelrahman I’m actually pretty much over it now and I don’t watch porn because I don’t want to. Porn doesn’t help though. I promise. If you have it remember it’s a voice in your head that is attracted to the same gender but it’s not you. It’s the same voice that wants you to be depressed.
@@annadeleon_ Hi! How are you now? Reading that you are pretty much over it gives me hope (i am a girl too)
@@mariangelamariangela4199 oh I’m a lot better!
My Experience: I woke up one day and just watched some youtube like I normally do and I started seeing guys on it and think their kind of handsome and good looking, but i've never felt this way before and it started worrying me because i know im straight but I felt as if i were turning gay but I dont want to be gay I want to be straight, I started telling myself that I was straight and my brain was telling me otherwise and it stressed me out alot, its not thag im afraid to tell my parents and this is how I know its this cause I have a gay brother and my family accepts him, I told a person I trust with my life and they gave a bit of closure but after a while anxiety and stress built back up, I done some of the thing listed in this video and its getting better, this started about 1 or 2 days ago and I hope i can get rid of it very early.
It's a bleh feeling for sure. I'm now just going through something really similar. I know I'm straight, I always have been. But intrusive thoughts take over, and they can be difficult to ignore. I am just now working it out, but taking the time to be mindful of who you are and what you like.
Happy New Years! I just want to say a quick story of me going through this I was suffering with these thoughts for about 4 months and really being isolated and having anxiety and at the point of depression I did my research and that’s what made it worse. And I came to realize that it is sin to give in the lust full pleasures, thought it will help get rid of the thoughts But one day I was watching a Sermon And all I can remember was God tell me I was not alone and you are not also! And God brought me to his Son Jesus and at that point that changed my life completely bc he brought me to peace to those thoughts. Jesus had suffered much more of dying for us on the cross and can give you rest if you run to him, Pray to God to help you! There’s much more that happen. stay Strong and seek help!
What is good to start for the first step ?
You know what the horrible thing is..........I'm watching this HOCD video just for reassurance from my HOCD. So in a way, this video is doing me more harm than good. But I appreciate the knowledge and I'm grateful for this vid.
I'm going to explain how I've been struggling and hopefully someone can relate to this so I know I'm not alone at least because it's making me worried. When my hocd starts to slowly fade away, i get this thought that says "don't feel better yet what if you WANT to become bisexual in the future" like I know it sounds weird but then the anxiety comes back again. I'm afraid that in the future this thought of me being bisexual might come back and I will enjoy it and it scares me. Help?
same, ive been dealing with this for like 4 months and its the worst thing that happened to me.. i also have a guy crush and then this thought just suddenly comes up "are you really attracted to him?" and yeah it just sucks..
This used to happen to me as well, my brain would always tell me, “you’ll change your mind in the future” it’s been over 6 years, and I realized that it was just another intrusive thought and it wasn’t real!! I am so much happier and I’ve grown so much
For me it just started happening like 5 months ago and it got really bad and I keep telling myself that I’m through the worst of it and that it’s getting better but the months keep going by and it isn’t going away. I feel so stuck because I can tell myself that I’m gay or bi and sometimes I’m even convinced of it but then it just goes away after a little while. I feel like I’m stuck in a loop and keep asking myself these questions and the answer never changes but I can’t stop. And sometimes when my anxiety goes down about it it just makes it worse because “that means that I’m okay with being gay so I am gay” and then it just comes back.
That’s NOT true!! If it makes you feel sick or terrible don’t believe the thought! Of course there is absolutely nothing wrong with being gay, but that’s not you. You know yourself better than the intrusive thoughts do. You will break out of the cycle :)
Your mind will always get something for you to worry about. It can be anything and it'll fuck up your memories or feelings or anything you always certain about to get you in fear state.
Maybe you should try to accept things that happen to you. As long as you can accept anything that happen to you, then no fear can harm you.
What if you're really gay ? Fine, as long as it doesn't scare you anymore.
I know it doesn't easy as it sound. I still have those thoughts even i've said to everyone i'll never be gay but then i said to myself that no one can scare me even myself.
@@zella1509 hey Ty for this comment it’s rlly helped my fear, I convince myself I am and it makes me feel like I wanna cry i rlly don’t wanna be and ofc I’m not homophobic I just don’t wanna be, when I say to myself I’m straight or when others say I am it makes me question myself and I think “am I in denial” which makes me feel like I am even more! please help 😭
i’ve been dealing for this for a very long time so it relieves me to watch this
Did you cure it
I have always liked boys and still do, but I'm getting random unwanted thoughts about my sexuality. For example one day I was talking to my best friend (girl) and thought "what if I kissed her right now". The thought was so scary I had never thought anything like this before it was 'disgusting' to me. As I thought about it more the idea became less 'disgusting' but still not something I was interested in. As the week went on a began to think that this meant something. Was I Bi? I cried over this for days and nights I started obsessing over it, I kept forcing myself to make this thought to happen so that I knew things hadn't changed. But every time I Had the thought the idea became more tolerable. Im not homophobic i just personally prefer being straight and I wanna keep it that way. But now also every second of the day i ask myself would i make out with her getting scared to the fact I said yes. I have no idea if I'm overthinking and if its because we're in quarantine but i need advice and opinions.
Exact same thing happened to me; you are not alone.
im scared that if i go back to school and i see my bffs who are girls will i just get these unwanted thoughts - this is what just scares me the most i told my mom about it and she told me that I'm crazy...,
ami potter I’m having the same thing I’m scared that when I go to school I’ll just suddenly be attracted to the Same sex
Aye bro. Drop your snap so we can talk cuz I wanna talk to someone who struggled with this
If you need to, distance yourself from your friends if it makes the thoughts worse. I didn’t do this, and it just fueled the thoughts and made me feel sick and weak. If they are your true friends, they will understand that you need time for yourself.
Don’t believe your mom either, she doesn’t understand what you’re going through. My mom was similar, she just told me to “ think of good things”
@@honey4005 ahh i had better days, it got more worse im not complety confused and lost but i somehow feel like it will be fine again and im holding onto hope :)
My fear isn't of being gay, it's of not being gay. I learned I was a lesbian in middle school, years ago, and was overjoyed that it was even an option because I'd never been attracted to men. Now I still don't want to be with a man but I keep feeling like I might be lying to myself about who I am and my brain keeps harassing me over it. I've done the symptoms mentioned in the video like the testing and the ruminating and it sucks, honestly. Some days I feel completely secure and confident in my sexuality and some days I can't stop worrying about whether I'm confusing myself.
I have the exact same issue. I hope you're doing well🌼🙌
It's been a week I have been facing it. And it's been around 3 days I have watched this video....I have slowly followed the step...and am still following....and it's slowly working ...I used to have these intrusive thoughts all day long. Now it's like ...it's been reduced to almost half. Thanks
How are u now r u ok how much time did it take to recover???
@@vivansharmam4028 I am fine now. I can control these thought. I dont stress over it anymore. I am straight and I know that. So no such thoughts can disrupt my thinking.
@@ReallyKilRoy how much time did it take to get bit matter 1 month for me now and it's only getting worse
@@vivansharmam4028 i was in class 11th in lock down when i started having these thoughts. It started to get better when my school finally reopened. I found new girls i was attracted to. Slowly this thoughts started to disappear. I very rarely have these thoughts now. I suggest you to engage yourself into something that you like. I love drawing and digital (graphics) designing. So I started to work on commissions and stuff. But yeah, something that you feel will distract you from these thoughts, do that. I hope the best for you my G.
I've like had this thing for a week now. I know I am straight for 200% I have space in my heart for only boys. I feel like I am getting better now. I know I am going to get through this. Its so weird that my mind is trying to make me someone who I am not. Its ok everything will be alright
yASSSSS same energy x
Going through this from past two weeks. I hope to recover soon
@@gagandeepkaur5523how r u now
@@gagandeepkaur5523how r u now
I am gonna start my therapy on Monday. Maybe I can write to you and tell you what I will learn there. My anxiety is gone but I will do this therapy because I never want this to happen to me ever again. Since my anxiety is porn induced, maybe you can do a video about this new movement, called NoFap? - Best greetings and keep up the good work.
That's awesome you're starting therapy. It's great to maintain progress! I've never heard of this program but I'll check it out!
i’m going through this and also having gender intrusive thoughts. i’m a strict Christian/Catholic, i know that i’m a girl and i know that i’m straight. but the thing is that, i have been getting confused with my own gender. getting into the males perspective, i also think that i’m getting into women. so thank you for this video
Don't be too harsh on it.
I'm a Catholic as well and just think HOCD as a thought or like a friend that asks you questions.
Say "I don't know" because you don't really know and you won't really care cause it's just a thought/question.
Doesn't determine who you are.
@@JaniumCanium thanks but i think i’ll stick to saying that i’m a girl and i like boys
how are u doing now??
I wasn’t aware that this was an OCD until I read it on quora.
Giving a context about me first, I meditate quite often and workout like crazy but somehow post this trauma I realise my meditation technique was all wrong. I used to meditate earlier for 20 mins a day just to block the thoughts and keep mind free. But this incident changed my way to approach mind. So whoever is going through this trust me it might sound an irony but you are lucky. You witness a once a lifetime chance to not associate with your thoughts. I repeat I am not my thoughts and I am the observer of them as they rise and fall in my mind. Why I say lucky because you can choose your thoughts and build the life you want. Imagine all the years of bullshit mind has made us go through. I used to stammer and had a really bad streak with girls. My first girlfriend cheated on me and after that I gave up and was like this is not for me. I built a wall around me and used to stay alone. I went to speech therapy got my best with speech and overcame that. But the alone mind did not go away. So my friend questioning my choices made this trigger somehow. Let us dive in to the story and experiences.
So it all started when my friend jokingly called me gay. I was drunk that night and I accepted that thought to be me(1st mistake).
Next ruminated over this for 2 days and journaled about my past relationships with girls(2nd mistake).
I journaled over 2 pages fighting the thought and this is how it become an ocd. I knew from the bottom of my heart and conscious that I am straight but somehow I tried to prove the thought wrong and fight it(3rd mistake).
This happened for 2 days and then I gave up saying it’s fine let mind do what it wants I don’t associate with this. But then the monster of a thought came out of the picture and told me that looking at guys will make you gay as you might be attracted to them and have sexual thoughts. At this point, my meditation was so weak that I thought to be my creation and gave into that(4th mistake). Please remember thoughts are created from a collective information that you cannot control. Like my friend telling me.
So, I stopped looking at guys on their faces and use to avoid eye contact. Finally I saw this video of Sadhguru describing how thoughts work. I am not body nor even I am my mind. This worked fine and I was able to sleep properly but thoughts kept on coming and I got scared again that it might be. Again gave into a thought(5th mistake).
Plus I had recently taken a sabbatical from work for some hikes before all this began and I was alone and free for the whole day. I never kept me occupied with something(6th mistake)
With that I decided that why can’t I like at guys like I used to earlier and took a chill. I was to talk to people again normally and whenever a thought used to come I was aware enough to let it go. But sometimes unconsciously I used to ponder over them and created a second set of thought to counter this one(7th mistake). For example, I would watch some lesbian porn which I really enjoy and some solo girl action to get over this. This kept me satiated for sometime and bam back to square one of running thoughts.
Next, I was continually meditating this new way to be as aware of thoughts as possible and I saw a strange behaviour. Because of countering this thought by watching continuous porn my approach towards women also changed. All u could see was women’s asses and fantasise. 24/7 sexual thoughts. (8th mistake).
I was like I like the women thoughts but random images of men flashing in my eyes, not naked or something in my case but just people and friends I meet everyday kept on coming. Now, at this I realised that it was almost 3 weeks and I never had a sexual thought about any man consciously intact it was something I just did not enjoy. As soon as the thought came it disappointed me and my arousals got killed. So at this point it was super sure that mind wiring has gone wrong and we need to fix this.
Also at this point I met a nice girl from bumble and we went for a weekend getaway. It was so nice to be with her. To hold her hands, to feel her body and every get the best of girl parts. At this point my mind never interrupted because I was so in the moment. So clearly once again all game of thoughts was going on.
Next, At the airport I remember staring at this woman’s ass for quite long because it looked crazy. I searched on quora that why do men do so? And bam first answer was be happy that you are not in LGBTQ community. Now brain being so fucking smart from next day made me look at all the asses irrespective of gender and then told me if you look at guys ass you are gay haha. At this point I was so happy that I am so aware that I can see these minute things. Man wonders of the brain.
Now, when I came back I had gotten so used to being close to the girl and was practically holding hands whole weekend the same behavior it attached to the generic population. I remember I was driving with my friends and my mind says hold the hand of your friend and rub it. I quietly observed it and laughed from inside, i am like this no longer is relevant. I took a deep breath and let it go. Now mind kept on showing images of us holding hands and it grossed the shit out of me. I was like let’s get this drive done with for gods sake. But the horror came when it said kiss your friend the way you kissed your girl last week. I was with them for 3 hours and by the time I came back home the kissing thoughts haunted me. My back head hurt so much but once I was home I took a shower, did some Isha kriya and realised that I was resisting the thought it once again and the in mind the more u resist the more it persists.( 9th mistake)
By this point I realised that I have acquired the art of letting go. So I decided that let’s take a step further and see what mind has got. Whatever it has got I will just say following for these thoughts: I accept these thoughts for what they are. I know that these thoughts have returned and they make sad and worried. I also know that these are just thoughts and with my next breath they will be gone. Also thoughts are thoughts and not things. I am not my thoughts as I am the one that observes them passing by. I also know these thoughts are a waste of time and not my friends so I let them go.
Now since I had resisted that kiss thought I saw that it returned in all my conversations with friends and family. But by this time I was mentally well aware of how to manage thoughts and how to let them pass. Since I have started doing that the intensity has drastically reduced.
Now the thoughts had reduced then brain gave me next indication that touching a guy will give you an arousal(10th mistake). I am like wow my friend how are you working. I gave into this again for some reason. I might have slept properly and wasn’t aware enough. I remember I accidentally saw my gym trainers butt and brain says see u saw it. I am like no I did not and the tennis began. This went on for a day or two and then I am like why am I this thought again. I came out of the thought into real life and simply started to do what I did earlier before this fiasco began. I checked out all the people in the road irrespective of gender and when the thoughts came for guys i was no dude no me and just let the thought slide. Also intentionally hugged my friends like the ways guys do and also hugged my female friends to give signals to the brain. So this went away in a day or two.
Now, final mistake(11th) was trying to feel the way touch felt on me for each gender. This looks as once again to check the arousal. I never got arousals when males touched me but from a generic point of view you get aroused by anything that’s sexual irrespective of gender.
At this point in between conversations random kiss thoughts pop up for each gender but it’s every minute and I just ignore it as it’s not important.
So, for everybody who is going through this just stay as calm as possible and let the thoughts slide. If you are genuinely interested in guys that that’s another case but then you would be enjoying these thoughts and not resisting them like me.
To summarise thoughts are just thoughts until we attach ourselves to them and in this case since it’s our identify our ego definitely takes it personally. But just be calm and them pass. A thought can only affect you till your next out breath :)
How is it going?
Thanks for the insight brother, im similar to you and had the same experiences. Im still having the thoughts on and off but after reading your comment im feeling alot better as our stories are very similar i get the exact same thoughts so it helps to know im not the only one
I have rocd. When the rocd calmed down a few weeks ago as I learned to accept the thoughts, hocd kicked in. It scares me more than the thoughts I had with rocd. My mom is with a woman (my parents are divorced) so just seeing her triggers my hocd. (hey I guess it's also a great exposure!) I know it's also linked to the projection I'm doing. I'm afraid my relationship will end up like my parents' marriage and that I will, like my mom, start dating a woman. But I don't want to, I am not attracted to women, I never have been, I want to stay with my boyfriend. I have to face the unknown, accept the uncertainty. I accepted it with rocd. I will accept it with hocd.
how are you now??