11 Ways to Stop Your D&D Group from Falling Apart

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  • Опубліковано 26 гру 2024

КОМЕНТАРІ • 331

  • @theDMLair
    @theDMLair  4 роки тому +19

    What's the longest you've ever had the same group running? (And what's the fastest a group crumbled apart?)
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    • @Fenikkusu14
      @Fenikkusu14 4 роки тому +8

      Almost 6 years now and still kicking

    • @theDMLair
      @theDMLair  4 роки тому +2

      Yeah, giddy up! 😁

    • @linus4d1
      @linus4d1 4 роки тому +4

      Being in the military, either my friends or I move often. The longest game I've had going was about 2 years and we always feel like it ends too soon.

    • @lfreezin3640
      @lfreezin3640 4 роки тому +1

      I'm fairly new so about 15 months is the longest and I've never really had a group fall apart

    • @ShugoAWay
      @ShugoAWay 4 роки тому +1

      Ooh i think I can win fastest to fall apart: before session 0 cuz the pissy snowflake DM ghosted the group

  • @reubenconner1679
    @reubenconner1679 4 роки тому +185

    "I chose as my arc type the special snowflake." That is brilliant. Really made me laugh

    • @theDMLair
      @theDMLair  4 роки тому +21

      I feel like lots of players choose that arch type. :D

    • @melkiorwiseman5234
      @melkiorwiseman5234 4 роки тому +3

      That made me LOL too. :)

    • @Doughy_in_the_Middle
      @Doughy_in_the_Middle 4 роки тому +2

      I kinda wanna make that as a Wizard archetype now.

    • @palidansghost
      @palidansghost 4 роки тому +4

      Someone should make that for real as a joke, one of my players found and brought me a character class called murder hobo

    • @carnivoriousleaf
      @carnivoriousleaf 4 роки тому

      @@Doughy_in_the_Middle At 3rd level the Special Snowflake can Choose one class from the following: Bard, Cleric, Druid, Sorcerer, and Warlock. They may learn spells fom the chosen classes spell list and they are treated as Wizard spells and use Intelligence for a Casting Attribute and for Spell DCs.
      Repeat at level 7 and level 14.
      I don't know what other abilities to give them.... Martial Weapons Proficiency?

  • @TheCrispAlien
    @TheCrispAlien 4 роки тому +136

    Alternatives to "since high school:"
    "Since puberty"
    "Since I wanted to start dating"
    "Since I passed Mr. Teacher's final exam"
    "Since I was old enough to hold hands"
    "Since I learned that I can fit in a locker"
    "Since I developed a conscience"
    "Since Lincoln freed the slaves"
    "Since MySpace was a thing"
    "Since I learned that I like big butts and I cannot lie. And none of my players can't deny"
    "Since SpongeBob SquarePants ripped his pants"
    "Since Luke learned who is his daddy and what did he do" (say with an Arnie impression)
    "Since Rocky fought Apollo"
    "Since man walked the moon"
    "Since the dawn of man"
    "Since the rise of the UA-cams"
    "Since Disney froze his head"
    "Since I started drinking coffee"
    "Since back in the nineties I was in very famous TV show"
    "Since nineteen ninety-eight when the Undertaker threw Mankind off hеll in a cell, and plummeted sixteen feet through an announcer’s table."

    • @theDMLair
      @theDMLair  4 роки тому +20

      Lmao. Great stuff.

    • @stephanmuller5804
      @stephanmuller5804 4 роки тому +8

      ... before the internet

    • @potatoinvader799
      @potatoinvader799 4 роки тому +10

      Good list, but you forgot one: " I've been a high school since dungeon master!"

    • @MonkeyJedi99
      @MonkeyJedi99 4 роки тому +2

      @@stephanmuller5804 since before the (public) internet applies to me.

  • @WhyYouMadBoi
    @WhyYouMadBoi 4 роки тому +79

    1:44 oh no he's become self aware he's too dangerous to keep alive

  • @WladcaPodziemia
    @WladcaPodziemia 4 роки тому +26

    "I was DM for... I doesn't matter" - that was most self-aware thing that those self-procleimed dn-d-dm-experts ever say. That part was good enough message on its own.

  • @1AmGroot
    @1AmGroot 4 роки тому +20

    I am currently running the lost mines of phandelver for my group. In the section where the green dragon comes up, they just decide to not fight him, and they strike a deal. They told him where phandelver was, and he went and destroyed it, and they split the loot 50/50. Now, I was ok with this for 3 reasons: 1. All of the players came to an agreement with the dragon on the deal, and no player was left out.
    2. It still allowed for roleplaying and funny scenes. For example, I know that green dragons are sneaky, manipulative, and selfish, so I had the dragon generously offer the players a ride on his back, just to attempt to throw them off of him midway in attempt to seize all of the loot for himself. In response, the cleric, who fell off with another player, remembered that he prayed to the goddess of luck, whose shrine was located in phandelver, and his prayers were answered with him hearing a voice in his head saying: I like you. He then asked if he could pray for this goddess to save him. As he was a cleric, and the goddess liked him already, he managed to get the goddess to notice his prayers, having them land in a lake and survive the fall.
    3. It was fun. The most important thing in my games is if everyone is having fun. And as this was a hilarious and unusual situation, I went along with it.
    True, it did ruin the chance of them doing a few side quests, which they were supposed to get from the people in the town, resulting in them being slightly under leveled, but they are smart people who appreciate challenge, so I went along.

    • @danjr199
      @danjr199 4 роки тому +1

      I love improvised story progression like this, Good job dude, sounds like it was fun. I encourage my players to be creative and think outside the box this way.

    • @itsmebeter3538
      @itsmebeter3538 3 роки тому +1

      maybe something unexpected will happen when i run this next week.

  • @TheInsider15
    @TheInsider15 4 роки тому +48

    "I chose as my archetype: the special snowflake" yeah sounds about right about Evocation Wizards

    • @theDMLair
      @theDMLair  4 роки тому +5

      Just evocation wizards?

    • @TheInsider15
      @TheInsider15 4 роки тому +4

      @@theDMLair I mean it's posssible that there are more than the Evocation school

    • @cactusman1771
      @cactusman1771 4 роки тому

      @@TheInsider15 nah, that would be an illusion.

  • @docartemis2878
    @docartemis2878 4 роки тому +30

    What I typically do if half or more of the party can’t make it to a session is offer to play something else. A one shot, a board game, or even a game or two of mordheim.

    • @theDMLair
      @theDMLair  4 роки тому +14

      Yeah, doing something else fun as a group makes for a good change of pace too.

    • @joshpexk1215
      @joshpexk1215 4 роки тому +2

      DocArtemis i have started doing call of cthulhu one shots every time this happens and it really does work

  • @madkingnarfi
    @madkingnarfi 4 роки тому +24

    When it comes to the whole “keep your morbid fantasies at home” statement, I agree in a weird way. I don’t want to enact a particularly gruesome or horrific event all the time, but when a player is asking for it ie “I try to cut off his face,” followed by the failure of effectively cutting it “I burn the face with firebolt” I will vividly describe it as it feels like they want it and if they don’t then it insensitively stops them from doing it.

    • @madkingnarfi
      @madkingnarfi 4 роки тому +2

      And I’ll only ever touch the more horrific things like sexual assault and rape only if I have asked them if it is ok with these because of how touchy these subjects can be

    • @theDMLair
      @theDMLair  4 роки тому +10

      Yeah I guess I'm mostly taking about wierd sexual crap that some people want to bring into the game.

    • @madkingnarfi
      @madkingnarfi 4 роки тому +2

      the DM Lair yeah, I understand that. Though I do think that it is fine so long as a DM has explicitly asked the players if they are ok with the stuff before it is ever brought up in game (I personally don’t like to involve sex in my game though)

    • @twilightgardenspresentatio6384
      @twilightgardenspresentatio6384 4 роки тому

      IF they can be satisfied reasonably

    • @twilightgardenspresentatio6384
      @twilightgardenspresentatio6384 4 роки тому

      Mad King Narfi player appropriate, absolutely

  • @melkiorwiseman5234
    @melkiorwiseman5234 4 роки тому +8

    I guess I'm fortunate that I found a good DM for my first D&D game. I'm playing as a wizard and kind of wish I'd chosen something simpler, but the group had one of nearly every other major class (large group) so wiz became it for me.
    I'm fairly sure that our DM has deliberately ignored a few successful attack rolls made against my squishy wizard, for which I am grateful.

  • @superultragamer8245
    @superultragamer8245 4 роки тому +54

    Luke Luke Luke... your friend’s name was Matt. The fact that he is an amazing DM shouldn’t have surprised you in the slightest

    • @theDMLair
      @theDMLair  4 роки тому +16

      Lol. Great point. 😂

    • @primeemperor9196
      @primeemperor9196 4 роки тому +10

      What Luke didn't mention was that Matt's last name was Mercer.

    • @dndoodles2291
      @dndoodles2291 3 роки тому +1

      @@theDMLair Matt Mercer origin story?

  • @O4C209
    @O4C209 4 роки тому +43

    4:03 "Every other Saturday at 4pm we play."
    Me: How does he know my group's schedule?

    • @theDMLair
      @theDMLair  4 роки тому +7

      I know. Oh I know. 😈

    • @SGAman123_
      @SGAman123_ 4 роки тому +1

      @@theDMLair I’m actually gonna play from Saturday 2pm to Sunday 12pm every 2 weeks

  • @skycrafter2042
    @skycrafter2042 4 роки тому +7

    Also for players that miss a game my way of doing it is.
    Everytime the party plays are your not there you get a strike. If you play atleast one session the counter resets but if you miss 3 games in a row and get kick off.

  • @FrostTurnip
    @FrostTurnip 4 роки тому +8

    My group we slowly cycle through being the dm. Learning as we go. Giving each other general ideas for their future campaigns.

    • @gnarthdarkanen7464
      @gnarthdarkanen7464 4 роки тому +1

      I've long insisted that Players take turns as GM's... It avoids me getting burned out, and gives everyone a reasonable amount of Playing time as well as a "new appreciation" of the GM's work on adventures... It might seem a little bit "meta", but we tend to take it easier on a GM after we've been on the other side of the screen a time or two. ;o)

  • @TheDungeonCoach
    @TheDungeonCoach 4 роки тому +1

    I loved point #9 and #10! It’s about the players and making the best game for THEM possible... and THAT is the fun part of DMing!

  • @smokingcrow1925
    @smokingcrow1925 4 роки тому

    Hey, Luke ! I'm pretty new to D&D and your channel has been great for me . I'm going to DM my first campaign today, all your videos and website have been really useful so far ! Never stop making content, you're the best !!!

  • @linus4d1
    @linus4d1 4 роки тому +15

    "Since high school" never told us anything anyway. How long ago was that. You look pretty young so I'd guess it was less than 20 years ago. And you're right, time does not equal proficiency. Hopefully a person learns a few things through experience, but that's not a given. Your advice on these videos expresses more about your proficiency and skill than your longevity as a GM

  • @Empressofnight
    @Empressofnight 4 роки тому +19

    If I may add one
    Try to act as a voice of reason when your players start going off on each other for stuff away from the table

    • @theDMLair
      @theDMLair  4 роки тому +3

      Yeah totally. It'd be great if they left that stuff out of the session.

    • @gnarthdarkanen7464
      @gnarthdarkanen7464 4 роки тому

      Kinda sucks to have to be a running tabulation of RPG rules, keep up with all the "In Game" environments... AND a referee for encounters... AND to beat it all, a GM also has to be a "jurist" on out-of-Game arguments, too.
      Mostly, when "other shit" gets in the way of the Game, I prefer to settle it all as permanently as possible, rather than bitch needlessly at Players for continuing some in-game antics from out-of-game BS... We'll just have "that conversation" before going on, and try to resolve whatever it is... or make the harder choice that one or the other Player has to go.
      I hate being a "counselor" in those situations, because a long standing feud can kill a group... BUT just repeating "check your BS at the door" over and over doesn't get it settled and is often as infuriating to everyone not involved in whatever argument/feud, as it is to me...
      If we're being honest, though, all this could be solved with "Act like an adult", even if you aren't... fake it. ;o)

  • @thor97470
    @thor97470 4 роки тому +4

    On number 10 with the dm's precious plot line; I find that I have difficulty in planning too far ahead.
    Once I have around a session worth I am unable to plan ahead. Once that session happens the ideas eek out crazy for about a session worth. My games so far are half planned and half off the cuff.

  • @fallenreaper9066
    @fallenreaper9066 3 роки тому +1

    You literally give what the Army calls an AAR and I love this. I've been doing it for a bit, and it works. With the army it's 3 goods, what could be improved upon and 3 no, for the love of the 9 hells never do this again, just simplified. Hell yes

    • @theDMLair
      @theDMLair  3 роки тому

      Awesome. I think the Army stole that idea from me actually. LOL

  • @keithsato9197
    @keithsato9197 4 роки тому

    Thanks Mr.Luke!
    I'm planning on asking my group for feedback about the campaign. They've made a huge effort to keep playing & show up every week! I'm doing something right! We're about to play online for now to help my FLGS with social distancing, but it inspired me to make that effort to keep the sessions happening.
    Things I think help keep us together 1)effort to give each player equal time, 2)work-in their backstories 3)plan plan plan then improvise improvise improvise 4)voices & singing 5)the power of saying YES to players - it's their story!

  • @joem1480
    @joem1480 4 роки тому +48

    One game that my daughter and I had been in for a while brought in a new player who at every single game session made all sorts of sexually suggestive comment around my daughter what time was 9 years old. Nothing was done about this even after complaining to the DM, So eventually we just stopped coming to the game.

    • @Dar2Jee
      @Dar2Jee 4 роки тому +11

      Thats exactly why you should not mix adults and non adults in games...

    • @theDMLair
      @theDMLair  4 роки тому +24

      Yeah, that's messed up.
      Sohnke - that's exactly why someone needs to speak up and put an end to crap like that. Especially when a child is in the group.

    • @joem1480
      @joem1480 4 роки тому +12

      @@Dar2Jee my daughter was part of the game before the guy was, and several of his comments were directed at her. I did say something multiple times and tried to talk to the DM on multiple occasions. I'm still friends with some of the group and that guy drove off a number of players.

    • @joem1480
      @joem1480 4 роки тому +18

      There is also a difference between mature content in a game, which my daughter could handle, and sexual comments being directed at my daughter directly

    • @thedragonofhatred
      @thedragonofhatred 4 роки тому +3

      i would tell that ahole to roll initiative then punch him in the face. tell him he was suprised so you got first attack. (note after saying stop, then again the guy is older and shes 9, effin 9! sorry had to rant)

  • @bryankia
    @bryankia 4 роки тому

    One mans lazy is another mans treasure. I have to imagine those intros are time consuming and for me they are always worth a laugh. Have a great holiday.

  • @mrcobrabubbles6889
    @mrcobrabubbles6889 3 роки тому +1

    "No D&D is better, then Toxic D&D." Always try to fix things at first, and "Act like an Adult". But have a hard line set after a serious incident.

  • @bodine219
    @bodine219 3 роки тому

    Thank you for all of these videos. I'm DMing my first campaign starting next month and I have been binge-watching. My only experience was one one-shot. I felt like a total noob, but everyone seemed to have fun.....so I wrote a homebrew campaign. (well the beginning and the *big* problems. I can't write more because I have no idea what the players will do)

  • @primeemperor9196
    @primeemperor9196 4 роки тому +6

    Here's what one DM I had would constantly do.
    He would change how certain spells worked mid-game. He tried to tell me I couldn't use Moonbeam, because I wasn't in direct moonlight.
    He would argue with a different player. He doesn't get too much fault for tis one, tho. That player was a snowflake.
    He would gloat when he got a TPK. In one instance, he shouted "TPK!" after killing the party in Rise of Tiamat. (My character retreated from the battle, and the rogue escaped into the bushes, btw.)
    After the conclusion of the Rise of Tiamat game, he said we were "supposed to die" in that encounter. (We weren't, btw.)
    This is probably his worst offense. We were in an elven village. (Still Rise of Tiamat) The village leader was being blackmailed by the dragon cult. My dad tried to talk to him and gave him a dagger. The elder somehow knew where my dad was (he was flying and invisible.) and grabbed him. He then shouted that we were members of the dragon cult, and the elves attacked. Me and whiny player decided to defend ourselves. He swung a greatsword, killing two, and I turned into an earth elemental, slamming two more into paste. Next round, I decide to "nope" on out of this encampment. DM decided that since elves were creatures of nature, I had committed an evil act, and was subject to an alignment change and *LOSING ALL MY POWERS!*
    It got bad enough to where me, my dad and my brother decided to just leave the group, and the others fizzled out. We played a bit more with the other three players another time, but it didn't go anywhere. My brother was DM, but had to go to boot camp after two sessions, and nobody took up the mantle of DM. (Even though I kinda wanted to.)
    But now, I've found a great group (I'm the DM) and we're all having a blast. We talk about the game all the time, the players have AMAZING characters, we have a constant schedule, where everybody shows up on-time, (We go kinda late at night to avoid scheduling conflicts.) As far as I can tell, everybody loves the game. Everybody's character is unique with their own flavor.

  • @Solar-Flame
    @Solar-Flame 4 роки тому +1

    I've been participating in a now 5 months campaign with a DM i introduced to d&d 1 month prior to the campaign and he's the best DM i've ever had

  • @hleroklite
    @hleroklite 4 роки тому +3

    yes there is a correlation between how long you do something and how good you are, but only if your practicing and mastering correct principles from the beginning.

    • @gnarthdarkanen7464
      @gnarthdarkanen7464 4 роки тому

      There's a certain amount to be said for "doing it poorly" long enough to get better at it, even accidentally. We all started out as absolute noob's, and many of us had nothing other than "trial and error" to work with... adapting our styles to our Players.
      It may be worth acknowledging that not everyone actually gains skill for all the repetitions, though. Some people can be doing the same thing for years (even decades) and never garner a smidgeon of relative skill at it. Doesn't seem possible, but I've seen it, too.
      It just tends not to be the case. ;o)

  • @federicopettinicchio
    @federicopettinicchio 4 роки тому

    When I started my current campaign, which is my first one, heavily homebrewed and online. I started off with 10 different strangers across 2 groups making parallel sessions, lost a bunch and gained a bunch after around 5 players lost and gained I stopped recruiting and they started to dwindle all the way down to having me joining them together in a single session and finally down to a small 3 players group that kept showing up every single game, I asked them if they had any friends who wanted to try and we got a 4th player that joins when she can and now a 5th is gonna join and we'll see how that goes. Clearly losing 10+ people since when we began doesn't seem like a big accomplishment but I'm glad those that are left enjoy and engage the campaign and basically never miss it, since the group started to be the same people each week morale has started to increase and they appear more and more taken with the game and in synch with each other, which in turn made me more willing to put in the extra effort to keep the quality of the game up and add new things for them to do.

  • @LordZeebee
    @LordZeebee 4 роки тому

    I'm still very new to all this but one thing my group did to combat scheduling problems was to just play more one-shots and honestly, it's great.
    I've been playing my secondary character through almost all the one-shots and it's created this nice "slice of life-y" feel, i love my little Tortle boi but it's kinda cool to imagine he has a life outside of the times i play him. Sometimes the other players also reuse their old characters and our characters have a little catch-up and playful banter based on previous adventures, it's great for roleplay!
    This also sidesteps the issue of trying to rationalize or ignore the sudden disappearance of a PC in the main game while still feeding that feeling of FOMO that drives people to actually get their butts to the table. Some one-shots take more than one session for us so if you miss a day you're kinda locked out of playing the next game unless things move quickly or there's an easy way to add a player. And since the group was already smaller than the main group those one-shots are much easier to organize. The system isn't perfect obviously, there is potential for a one-shot cancellation death-spiral, but it's served us well so far.

  • @VincentV465
    @VincentV465 4 роки тому

    I've been playing with the same group of friends for just over a year. The only one of these issues that has ever come up is the first one, scheduling. In the first campaign we ran, it was essential that every player was there for every session. As we all know, life happens. I always made sure that the remaining players still showed up and at least hung out, played another game, or watched a movie. This worked for us because we all agreed before hand that we didn't want to play unless everyone could make it and that this was the best way to handle the times that not everyone could.

  • @KILLERGUNZ27
    @KILLERGUNZ27 4 роки тому +3

    Too few players has never been a problem for any of my personal group. I actually just finished running all of Curse of Strahd for just one player, and it was one of the best campaigns we ever had

    • @nesso.9944
      @nesso.9944 8 місяців тому

      Same here. Too few has always been better than too many in my experience. As long as the few are committed then it's never a problem, and scheduling is much easier. Combat is quick and easy, and everyone has enough time in the spotlight to roleplay. But too many is always a problem, even in the rare cases where everyone makes it to every session and is committed.

  • @ohthenoises
    @ohthenoises 4 роки тому +6

    Saying that scheduling is in the DM’s control is *sorta* not always the case. I had a player change their time of availability, another player’s mother pass away, and another player’s work schedule all alternate so 2/5 of the players were able to play and it rotated every week.
    Not really anything I could do about that aside from just calling it.

    • @theDMLair
      @theDMLair  4 роки тому +3

      Agreed. There are lots of elements of scheduling that are outside the DM's control. They can only do so much.

    • @tivonor2
      @tivonor2 4 роки тому

      i will try to make this short. my method is something similar to this:
      campaigns go from level 1-20 and last between 2-3 years and we play weekly for 5 hours with a 30 min break.
      i tell everyone that they each get 2 "freebies" or "pause"s - (because the length of the game, this typically resets every 6 months and i announce it.
      if they dont want to miss out then they will tell me that they are using a freebie, otherwise the group plays on.
      there is one exception, i will let the whole group know that a player has a conflict immediately, and the group can decide (by vote if needed) to skip for the missing player.
      i think if you used a system like mine, it would give you flexibility that you might need, but also show the need to be present at the same time.

  • @DMKen
    @DMKen 4 роки тому +7

    The current version of my group has been playing 3 years, but some of the original members have been playing for 6 years

    • @TheodoreMinick
      @TheodoreMinick 4 роки тому

      The current version of my group has only one of the original players.

  • @JD-mh8be
    @JD-mh8be 4 роки тому +3

    As a first time Dm a lot of your videos really do help with my games but if you could do a video on how to introduce a bbeg or any villain I would really appreciate it and I feel like new DMs will really benefit from it

    • @Psychomaniac14
      @Psychomaniac14 4 роки тому

      DISCLAIMER: Not a DM myself
      anyway here's my idea:
      have them pretend to help the players but actually be a hindrance but make it look like you're just getting bad rolls, at least for the first 5-6 sessions that you have them with the players, afterwards make it more obvious that they're actually intentionally being a hindrance, before removing them and introducing the first underling of that guy. Just say you're coming up with a campaign idea and fleshing it out before you set it in stone what's gonna happen.

    • @muriloantonio3148
      @muriloantonio3148 4 роки тому

      @@Psychomaniac14 Yeah that's Nice man!! One of my BBEG(couldn't fit only one beacause I needed the main bbeg to show his versatility) is a changeling(i think thats the name), so I basically put him there sometimes, and If things are favorable, I start making him find trouble for my players, and basically be there not allowing them to forget the main villain

    • @Psychomaniac14
      @Psychomaniac14 4 роки тому +1

      @@muriloantonio3148 one of the other players in a campaign I'm in is a changeling and a prince lmao. The other is a princess, and I'm the daughter of two of the heroes that saved the world a century ago.

    • @theDMLair
      @theDMLair  4 роки тому +1

      Great video idea, Storm. Just put it in my backlog.

    • @Psychomaniac14
      @Psychomaniac14 4 роки тому

      @@theDMLair I already answered it. Could you review my answer please

  • @drizzo4669
    @drizzo4669 4 роки тому

    You seem fair and knowledgeable. I like your advice. Subscribed.

  • @Matt-md5yt
    @Matt-md5yt 4 роки тому +1

    Great topic today my man. Glad you covered it

  • @beancounter2185
    @beancounter2185 4 роки тому

    Lot's of good content! With regard to scheduling - my group has 5 committed players, and we try to play every Friday evening. My DM has set a minimum of 3 players to run a game, and less can play, the game is canceled for the week. For those who can't play, we assume that they are there, but in the background - so they get equal xp and gp, and aren't penalized due to their schedule.
    Group dynamics - My group gets along pretty well, but once I begged them for a short rest (I'm playing a warlock), but they said no (because of in game time constraints). So, since my spells slots were used up, and my invocations are mostly passive, I used the only tool I had left - eldritch blast. I ended up killing a (useful) NPC, and the rest of the group gave me a hard time. But if I had had that short rest, I could have used Hold Person...and they refused to acknowledge that they should have listened to me.

  • @TheGateShallStand
    @TheGateShallStand 4 роки тому +13

    Kick the wizard and I'll die.
    "If you shoot me, I'll kill myself!" -me, 2020

    • @INeedaName-cb2qw
      @INeedaName-cb2qw 4 роки тому

      Reminds me of a quote I heard from Borderlands 2.
      "Nobody kills me, but me!" -Krieg

    • @duncanshaw1256
      @duncanshaw1256 4 роки тому

      You don't kick out a wizard! You EXSPELL HIM! LOL!

  • @BlueBerryDM
    @BlueBerryDM 2 роки тому

    Ty! Changing the rules randomly IS THE WORST...especially if it negates a classes abilities

  • @shallendor
    @shallendor 4 роки тому

    In our Pathfinder group, if we don't have enough players for the normal campaigns, someone usually runs a different game. We also switch weeks if it allows someone to make the game.

  • @DaCrump
    @DaCrump 2 роки тому

    The rule one is big for me, I'm fairly new to the game myself and keep trying to learn as I go and between sessions, so any deviation throws me off when not explained. Changes can work and one I liked was a DM who made a change to Turn Undead and made it part of the god's power to be different in the way it was and it works great since it's simple and doesn't detract from anything.
    I also had one DM I played with come up with some new homebrew rule on the fly almost every session. Or make a sudden change like open dice in chat for everyone (it was through Discord) one session in which I use Shield with that knowledge to block an attack, to him just saying hit, miss, fail, succeed the next session with no numbers and confusing me at the change.
    Or suddenly deciding that a nat 20 on initiative goes first automatically only when a monster gets one (PCs got them before to no such benefit or rule being mentioned) and I got a really high roll that would of beaten them. Followed by a monster being immune to a spell's extra effect because they resisted the damage type of the spell. I think I've learned almost as much from just looking up rules as a result of stuff like that as I have actually playing that new class.

  • @LlamaNewton
    @LlamaNewton 4 роки тому

    I love your Grandcon shirt! I'm from the Grand Rapids area, and I've been meaning to go down to Grandcon one of these years. Thus far, my schedule has not cooperated, unfortunately.

    • @theDMLair
      @theDMLair  4 роки тому +2

      Dude I'm planning to be there this year. If you can make it come find me and say hi. 😁

  • @jacinto3513
    @jacinto3513 4 роки тому +2

    THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS VID. So good and so true.

  • @SonOfSofaman
    @SonOfSofaman 4 роки тому

    #10: best DM advice I've ever received. Thanks for the wisdom, Luke.

  • @deadpool-mp3gb
    @deadpool-mp3gb 4 роки тому +6

    In my experience the problem players didnt know they were being a problem. A simple conversation corrected the problems. Talking with your players is very important.

    • @theDMLair
      @theDMLair  4 роки тому +1

      100% agree. Talking solves most issues at the game table.

  • @Stormingmonkey
    @Stormingmonkey 3 роки тому +1

    "It does make it easier for me to not show up, knowing I won't miss anything"
    Me: Right.. We're playing next week period

  • @bonbondurjdr6553
    @bonbondurjdr6553 4 роки тому

    My player who couldn't always be there for the game came to me and said he wanted to play more of a supportive role, by himself! It surprised me but I understood and turned him into a mentor-like character. Somewhat like Gandalf: sometimes he's here, some other times he's away, seeking warning of the coming doom! Plus, now, my players can only level up when he's around! Mwuahaha!
    He does teach them useful spells and all that, though, so it's great!

  • @robertmcginty4146
    @robertmcginty4146 11 місяців тому

    Thank you for the advice about "Play anyway when players cancel." My Curse of Strahd campaign imploded over the weekend. I had 6 players. One player say they weren't going to make it three days beforehand. Then a second the night before the game. I said in the chat that the rest of the group would continue, their PCs would have plot armor and we'd make no rolls on their behalf. But my two players (who were late to session #1 btw) took it as a personal slight and quit the group, and removed me on Facebook. The morning of our game, I asked the remaining players about still meeting up, which enraged a third one who told me I was a horrible friend for not cancelling the session, and then rage quit. 4th player lives with her so assuming collateral damage. Just leaves my wife and teen as remaining two. Time for new players I guess.
    I thought I made the right call. I'd hoped that playing anyway would help maintain attendance. I was wrong.

  • @13thTemplar718
    @13thTemplar718 4 роки тому +1

    I've heard of some suggestions to do a one shot whenever there are absent players

  • @ratman505
    @ratman505 4 роки тому +1

    Here's my obligatory comment for the video to appease the great algorithm god. I don't have comments, remarks or jokes this time but a confession to make.
    I played favorites for months. In hindsight that was obvious to everyone at the table but apparently not to me in that situation. I think that was even the first step towards my relationship with the person that got the shortest end of the stick breaking apart and it haunts me to this day

    • @theDMLair
      @theDMLair  4 роки тому +2

      The algorithm is appeased and confesses that everyone makes mistakes. What differentiates a great DM from a poor DM is the willingness to recognize and learn from those mistakes.

  • @jaicro89
    @jaicro89 4 роки тому +1

    hello!, i have a problem, my DM is really into Game of thrones, Vikings and super realistic/hard games, whe are playing a campaign of 3.5 in a world with no magic, is really boring and drepessing, im more into Konosuba,princess connect, more happy/relaxing colorful worlds, so my question is: ...how do i quit the game without breaking their heart ?

  • @danjr199
    @danjr199 4 роки тому

    We have a big group, 9 total people: 8 PC’s and me the DM. Every week I post a voting poll for the best days for people to play. Whatever day gets the most votes is game day. Sometimes one or two can’t make it, our rule is as long as more than half the players are available we play anyway, unless they’re a approaching a pinnacle moment in the adventure that I would really like for everyone to be present for. Everyone is cool with this and it’s been working really well for us.

  • @verdrang5614
    @verdrang5614 4 роки тому

    My group has a variation of that first problem - one of us is a no-show a lot of times. So I actually flaunted the idea to remove him. My players almost crucified me xD
    They just didn't want to kick the guy, BUT. They didn't want to play without him, either.
    So I did this: I designed a secondary campaign that we go to whenever one of us can't play on a scheduled date. Made the setting easily preparable and simple to improvise, so it doesn't take much effort and is still fun with a smaller group^^ Maybe an unconventional approach, but it works for us.

  • @Armstrong056
    @Armstrong056 4 роки тому +1

    i was waiting for this video thanks for another awsome video

  • @Lcirex
    @Lcirex 4 роки тому +9

    I've been lucky since my players have opted to play mini or one shots of different RPGs when the whole group can't get together. So far we've tried out Call of Cthulu, modphious Conan, dead lands and currently pathfinder 2e. Had this group for over 2 years now.

    • @theDMLair
      @theDMLair  4 роки тому +4

      There are distinct advantages to trying out different systems. I love CoC.

    • @Lcirex
      @Lcirex 4 роки тому +1

      @@theDMLair Oh! I hope we can hear some CoC tails when Oct rolls around.

  • @dm-entores3119
    @dm-entores3119 4 роки тому

    Hey look any opinion on making a fighther subclass that turns you into a ciborg figther? Like you have implants of arcane tech that give you some bonuses for the sake of fullfilling a function or purpose that is the reason of you modifying yourself.

  • @bryc3391
    @bryc3391 4 роки тому +5

    I've been playing in a dnd group for at least 4 or 5 sessions. And we are running strahd. We are having fun but my little bro wants to dm. I'm scared he might give us the 'rocks fall you all die!' lol

    • @theDMLair
      @theDMLair  4 роки тому +4

      Yeah...you might want to finish Stahd before he takes a go at DMing. 😂

    • @ataberkdedemen9802
      @ataberkdedemen9802 4 роки тому

      Maybe play a one shot with him as the DM. Play his campaign after the Curse of Strahd ends.

  • @missyjames8887
    @missyjames8887 4 роки тому

    My current group of 4 originally started from 9 people (1 GM 8 PCs) and only 3 of us are from the original group. It can be a bitch to try and replace players but be patient and vigilant, we waited over a year to get our 4th player to start again.

  • @existinginaspace8347
    @existinginaspace8347 4 роки тому

    Your schedule never opens up when your work schedule doesn't line up with anyone elses.
    This is why I've been waiting for a noob friendly Monday game for over a year.

  • @markgnepper5636
    @markgnepper5636 3 роки тому

    Great stuff friend 👏 👍

  • @RPGmodsFan
    @RPGmodsFan 4 роки тому +9

    Bring Beer and Pizza to the table... :-)
    (Actually, I prefer wine over beer!)

    • @theDMLair
      @theDMLair  4 роки тому +4

      Wow, how did I not make that #12 ?!?

    • @twilightgardenspresentatio6384
      @twilightgardenspresentatio6384 4 роки тому

      RPGmodsFan I smoke- outdoors or indoors is your choice, but I’m bringing to share. It’s an old rpg tradition.

    • @stevenn1940
      @stevenn1940 4 роки тому +2

      Cocktails and food, that's my strategy.

  • @ispeaknonsense
    @ispeaknonsense 4 роки тому

    One of the things that Luke says that always gets to me is "It's not the DM's story, it's the players' story." I've only played twice before my current game, and those games didn't last long; so the impression I've always had is the DM creates the story, the characters live in it. It's a strange philosophical difference.

  • @HowtoRPG
    @HowtoRPG 4 роки тому +1

    Groups have so many reasons why they end. Some good points.

  • @117pien117
    @117pien117 4 роки тому

    my group has a joined calendar so we can see wich days te most people are available.
    it works pretty wel and we now usually have a good date every 2 weeks or so :)
    before this it was 1 a month so i recommend this especially with a groep that has a schedule that changes a lot.

    • @theDMLair
      @theDMLair  4 роки тому

      Awesome! Glad to hear that helped. Thanks for joining us in the game the other day, too. Lots of fun! 😁

    • @117pien117
      @117pien117 4 роки тому

      yess i had a blast it was really fun and i loved the cat loving giant :)

  • @LostFunocity
    @LostFunocity 3 роки тому

    Time is not my problem. My players and myself have time but due to circumstances we can't meet like we used to, due to Covid and restrictions. And doing stuff online is asking me to use money I don't have and I don't know how long this will last. As for keeping the group together. We are in regular contact and looking forward to continuing the adventure with new mechanics, new NPC's. More items, more baddies and just a major overhauling in general.

  • @piece1309
    @piece1309 4 роки тому +4

    I’ve been playing with the same group of 5 players for about 10 years. There is ONE rule. We play as long as 3 can show up.

  • @kingnothing007
    @kingnothing007 4 роки тому

    A group I lead were unhappy with how loot was split in one game as one player immediately asked for an item. So I decided to throw a lot of items as loot for the next time we had an encounter. They had just killed a BBEG so it fit the story too. They were really a lot of items... so many even the players thought something was odd... they thought the items might have been cursed... how could the DM be giving them so many after just normally handing out a few... so I played that out too... no cursed items, but then they had to choose whether to sacrifice one or several items to save people from bad guys... they didn't... a lot died... and now they gotta carry that burden in their maxed out bags of holding as they are now chased by relatives who want vengeance...

  • @scyobiempire4450
    @scyobiempire4450 4 роки тому +2

    1:25, The Wizard cast’s Wish to kick the other players.

  • @zanderthegreen2385
    @zanderthegreen2385 4 роки тому

    Most of the time whenever I join a new group they ignore or forget my limited free time and then schedule the game on a day I cant make it or no one else would be available on the days that I am and then the game either goes on without me or is canceled outright.

  • @skycrafter2042
    @skycrafter2042 4 роки тому +1

    My dnd party i have rn is a party of 5 and if onw person isent there i go on, but 2 people i usually cancel. Am i doing the right thing?

    • @MetaMdad
      @MetaMdad 4 роки тому +2

      Ask your players if they would like to press on. If it is too dangerous in the main story you could run a one shot side story for the other three players or let one of them run something. If everyone is fine with the breaks them there is nothing to change.

  • @pwbi3988
    @pwbi3988 4 роки тому +3

    When you make skits, do you do them in a large batch when you have a large batch of video ideas?
    Just realizing how much of a pain it might be to put the Barbarian facepaint on every time you need to record a video...

    • @theDMLair
      @theDMLair  4 роки тому +4

      Yes. I record everything for 1 month of videos (4-5 videos) all in one batch. Skits on day 1. Talking head parts on day 2.
      Then I usually edit them all over the next 2-3 days.
      The scripting is actually the most difficult part of the process though. But also the most important to ensure good videos.

    • @pwbi3988
      @pwbi3988 4 роки тому

      @@theDMLair Cool, that makes a lot of sense

    • @danjr199
      @danjr199 4 роки тому

      We appreciate your efforts dude. Thank you and good job!

  • @lordvaust5830
    @lordvaust5830 4 роки тому +1

    I’ve been a DM for a few months now. My players seem to think I’m a great DM, better than the ones they know at least. I take inspiration from a DM of a UA-cam D&D campaign (not critical role!) and try to emulate his style while still doing my own thing too. I think the difference between a good DM and a bad one is wether or not they can make everyone in the group have fun while still enjoying the game they’re running themselves.

  • @Someguywithalotoftism
    @Someguywithalotoftism 4 роки тому

    Good practice plus time equals great, like if you’re a good dm from the start, if you take the right path and practice keep being good then you will be a great dm

  • @gabrielseller6434
    @gabrielseller6434 4 роки тому

    I am currently DMing a Curse of Strahd campaign. Things are going quite well but as we are a group of six more often than not at least one person can’t make it to any given session. I have agreed with the group that we go on if only one persons can’t make it but should I continue even if half the group can’t make it? I suppose we can shift our goals from the main story for these sessions but it almost feels wrong to go on missing so much of the group

    • @theDMLair
      @theDMLair  4 роки тому +1

      I have 5 players. If 3 are there we play. 2 is too few though. With a group of six, I feel like playing with 4 makes sense. If you are down to 3, I would probably cancel, do a one shot, or play board games.

  • @diddleriddle8921
    @diddleriddle8921 4 роки тому +1

    2:00 Oh you mean Matt Mercer, alright.

  • @DyrianLightbringer
    @DyrianLightbringer 4 роки тому

    Two of my players moved out of state, two got married and had kids. Any advice on how to prevent these problems?

  • @JGreen-vd8en
    @JGreen-vd8en 29 днів тому

    I started dming recently and everything was great, I did my best for my third attempt, but new player that was invited to game don’t want to continue and this is last game of my campaign, the grand finale

  • @kyleward3914
    @kyleward3914 4 роки тому

    I had a player who should have been a problem in my first campaign with my current group. He did strange and disruptive things. He stole from other characters and other players, though always in good humor. Like a player's turn would come up, they couldn't find their dice, and he'd give them back. He just managed to keep everyone smiling and laughing while they were cursing his disruptive behavior, which is the only reason he wasn't a (bigger) problem.

    • @theDMLair
      @theDMLair  4 роки тому

      Yeah, it can be done well. I think it depends on the players and the group.

  • @amalone4909
    @amalone4909 4 роки тому

    the way we do schedules is that we have many campaigns, so no one misses out on any games they are in

  • @pigeonf.6298
    @pigeonf.6298 4 роки тому

    how do I convince my groups to carry on and play when one person is missing?
    Ive never been able to have them budge about it

  • @wonderfurret8223
    @wonderfurret8223 4 роки тому

    The easiest fix for number 1 is to take characters out of existence for a period of time when certain players are gone.
    Some people believe that this takes a chunk out of game immersion, in which I say "holy cow, this is the one thing that takes you out of the game? Dang, you need some priorities set straight".

  • @alexcarlson6776
    @alexcarlson6776 4 роки тому

    What do you do when the DM (me) doesn't know what to do next, and feels like we should just start a new game? I don't want to drop what we have, cause the players love their characters, but I'm just stuck.

    • @danjr199
      @danjr199 4 роки тому

      Maybe Take a few weeks off to peruse some inspiring materials and write something

  • @trevorspencer4877
    @trevorspencer4877 4 роки тому

    im in 2 d&d games. one where im a player and one where DM. the one where im a DM is a homebrew and it has been so fun. we all live all across the country so we play that on discord. im scared that the final boss that might completely destroy them.

  • @tamasszalanics7507
    @tamasszalanics7507 4 роки тому

    Hey, I have a question.
    So, I made a big mistake, in one of my adventures. In short, my players have a lot of gold, and weapons they can sell, and buff themself up, witch I don't want.
    Can I fix this, without throwing stronger enemies at them?
    I couldn't steal from them, because they either woke up, or hid the money. I really need an advice.

    • @LlamaNewton
      @LlamaNewton 4 роки тому +2

      Inflation! You're in charge of the world as the DM, so just raise the prices of the things they want to buy. Make it so they can afford one or two of the items they want, but not all of them. This doesn't take away all of their fun and it gives them a meaningful choice to make while still keeping them from becoming way more powerful than you are ready for. If you want an in-game excuse for raising prices, maybe have a few townspeople mention how so many adventuring groups have come through lately that sales are booming. Increased demand and a larger amount of liquid assets to go around equals higher prices--economics baby!

    • @tamasszalanics7507
      @tamasszalanics7507 4 роки тому +1

      @@LlamaNewton thank you! 🦄

    • @LlamaNewton
      @LlamaNewton 4 роки тому +1

      @@tamasszalanics7507 You're welcome!

  • @syliscloud7808
    @syliscloud7808 4 роки тому +1

    ya know ive asked my players what they find fun in dnd... they never told me anything and i keep asking and nothing, then some times after a session they say it was kinda boring but idk what they like so i don't know what to add. I'm suffering.

    • @danjr199
      @danjr199 4 роки тому

      Maybe Poll them with suggestions, or with topics and ratings 1-5. They might feel better offering feedback anonymously

  • @liquidweird6055
    @liquidweird6055 4 роки тому

    I run with a quorum system. If there are too few players then we run NPCs in another part of the world doing something that may have some impact on the game. Sometimes its villains doing something dastardly, or a group of nobles or commoners encountering some terrible evil or a political summit where the political landscape may change. Players get the chance to enrich the setting and impact the plot. Its important to consistently play on schedule and this helps build up the game world

  • @MarvelX42
    @MarvelX42 4 роки тому +2

    3:29 is when the video starts.

  • @societyslostone
    @societyslostone 4 роки тому

    It's kinda funny that my group will have been playing for a whole year next Friday. And we play twice a week. It's a text campaign, but it's been Soo much fun!

  • @asastromberg5943
    @asastromberg5943 4 роки тому +1

    I won't tell you how long I have been dm:ing today...
    A few seconds later: in my first group in high school...

  • @kjv66
    @kjv66 8 місяців тому

    Nice shirt! Grand Con! I have that shirt too! 😎

  • @patrickdees5256
    @patrickdees5256 4 роки тому

    Yeah scheduling is definitely an issue. And my brother that's currently living with me wont play unless someone else plays with him. So my current campaign is a bit on life support right now, and I haven't even started session one!

    • @theDMLair
      @theDMLair  4 роки тому +1

      Sounds like it's time to find some more players then! 😁

    • @patrickdees5256
      @patrickdees5256 4 роки тому

      @@theDMLair yeah. My best friend from high school is wanting to play, he lives four hours away now, some I'm thinking about trying role20, for when he can't make the drive over.

  • @cardinalchicanery4036
    @cardinalchicanery4036 4 роки тому

    My groups problem is the DM not a player character. I am trying to hold my group together but it doesn't look good.

  • @bruced648
    @bruced648 4 роки тому

    one of your better advice vids!

  • @Boss-_
    @Boss-_ 4 роки тому

    If you start a game with your friends, and then one has to leave and you replace him, and then broom handle breaks and you replace it, but then the broom breaks and you replace that, and then you replace the handle yet again, is it still the same DnD game?

    • @theDMLair
      @theDMLair  4 роки тому +1

      Probably not. Does the dust pan still work?

    • @Boss-_
      @Boss-_ 4 роки тому

      @@theDMLair Yeah, but now all the dust's backstory doesn't fit with the events so far, and it wants to go into a different bin instead of fighting the dragon that the second handle swore to slay

  • @Pasta_Parade
    @Pasta_Parade Рік тому

    To play in my game players gotta apply. And one of the questions on the app is can you keep a consistent schedule lol

  • @RideShields
    @RideShields 4 роки тому

    Some of the reasons is why I do adventures league. Constant adventures some what same party. If someone doesnt rock up it doesn't matter the show goes on.

    • @theDMLair
      @theDMLair  4 роки тому

      That's a great point. I played in a couple AL games and it was fun. Not having to worry about who shows up is a great advantage.

  • @spaz_taz4910
    @spaz_taz4910 4 роки тому +1

    i found this video a week too late. 4 months of work on a multiverse down the drain.... yay...

  • @gregorybaker5558
    @gregorybaker5558 4 роки тому

    Is there a "quorum" of players necessary before canceling a session? If you have six players and four show up, move on the with the game. BUT if you have six players and ONE shows up, do you still move forward? Assume that friends and players are rare and that you do not have "on call" players waiting in the wings. Or do I need a social network of dozens of gamer friends before considering DMing?

  • @Lrbearclaw
    @Lrbearclaw 4 роки тому

    One of the things that helps is that Fantasy Grounds went on sale (75% off, so $9.99 from $39.99) on Steam because of the illness going around.

    • @theDMLair
      @theDMLair  4 роки тому

      Does that give you access to all features?

    • @Lrbearclaw
      @Lrbearclaw 4 роки тому

      Sadly, no. It is just the $40 bundle (aka the $4 per month). The big boi bundle is still $120.... but it is easier to go back and buy those seperate when you save $30 out the gate.