Do You Plan For Marriage Or The Wedding?
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- Опубліковано 20 січ 2025
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Wedding is for the moment, marriage is for life.
Real
My dad's a pastor, and he always requires marriage counseling before he performs a wedding ceremony.
As he should. It’s very much needed. Relationships are hard & so much work. Married 20 years, 21 in June & I wish we had premarital counseling b4. We had to live & learn so many things as we went.
Hmmm. I think that's a very good idea could give us insight to something we didn't even think about and might see things in each of us that we aren't seeing in ourselves or each other. Thanks for sharing
Been married for 20 years., we have 2 wonderful children and an unbreakable bond full of love. Wife and I decided to skip the wedding rings and the expensive wedding. Went to the courthouse with our 2 witnesses and had a party after that.
Will I can be wrong. U found ur better half. . Nowadays, it's dead
Same here. Hubbie and I went to the Courthouse and will celebrate 33 yrs this June.
Same…went to the courthouse & now have 2 beautiful children & celebrating 21 years in June. Looks like the courthouse weddings are winning! 🏆
No wedding, inexpensive rings, and working on buying our home.
What if y'all got it financially?
@@D-Rock_in_BKLYN Maybe they do.
It's harder to get out of marriage. A PLAN IS NEEDED
Cost more
Exactly this
It seems like most people plan weddings and have NO plan for their marriage, including entering marriage without having had conversations about the things that are critical to it - like money, sex, children, parenting, career goals, values, etc. - beyond a superficial level. Plans and people can change, yes. And yet, many people skip even preliminary conversations about a marriage plan before getting engaged.
Well said
Exactly & having been married 20 years I would suggest ALL couples do premarital counseling. It’s very much needed.
I always said leading up to my wedding that I never had a dream wedding, I had a dream marriage. I never cared much about the wedding because I want a healthy marriage that is long lasting. As a child of divorce, my main motivation is basically doing everything I can to make sure my marriage is long lasting. We’re celebrating our two year wedding anniversary this week, and I think we’ve been doing a great job. ❤️
Well my husband and I plan for our marriage. We understand the wedding was for everyone else and only for one day. Our marriage means the world to us. We work hard towards the lifetime together. #7years strong and counting. Praise God 🙏🏾
My husband and I were married at the courthouse. We had a church wedding later. We spent money on purchasing a home.
As a man planning a marriage right now, the engagement ring she picked out was a $795. She wear that ring everyday. My marriage will probably clock in under $6000 with 4 star hotel in a small community on the US and Canadian border. 100 or less will be there and it's all with purpose. We been together for 5 years and a half years. Been thru ups and downs and we determined what we want and how we want to live first. Before the planning started. And my wife admitted that she was amped for the day and didn't think about "forever". Once she did that work on herself and what she wanted her mindset changed and it changed our relationship for the better. You cant plan just for the day.
I told my fiance that I really dont care about our wedding being fancy. I care about the commitment. I care more about our future. Plus, Im tryna keep my money chile.
Im single and alone. This got nothing to do with me. Guess id exit
lol
My wife and I had a nice small wedding because we were focused on building a family and our empire. We both are business owners and we are focused on our lives, not just an event. To each their own, but for us, that was much more important.
Exactly why I want no ring and no wedding. Small beach commitments with him and myself and that’s all. I’m not here to put on a show for people. I want real dedication, commitment, loyalty, and just experiencing one another for life and beyond.
Plan for your marriage, my wedding was very cheap and we are going 5 years strong. Marriage is hard work !!
We struggling 2.5yrs in lol its so hard! Blending 2 lives into 1. We also didnt move in before we got married nor had sex. Did it Gods way but still learning. Any advice?
In my personal opinion What it means to be married is to come together as one when you make a decision you make the best decision for you and your partner not for just you💯
People don’t plan for if things were to go wrong either. That should be thought of before marrying someone.
Latinos do speak HELLA fast, Jess! 😂😂😂 I can tell you about my entire weekend on 3% battery. And still leave room for feedback. 😂😂😂 ♡
😅
😂😂😂😂
Lol I love it
I think that in a serious relationship you prepare for marriage throughout the relationship. It’s okay , to prepare for both
now everyone is a marriage expert 🤣🤣🤣
I feel like ppl on the outside are always asking about the wedding. But you and your partner should definitely be planning how you are going to combine forces with things like health and life insurance, ownership of homes, contributing into your kids college funds or savings or rainy days.
Definitely plan for the marriage! Weddings are amazing!!! However; the marriage is what we need to sustain!! My husband and I have been married coming up on 16 years and we never had a wedding. Got married at the court house!! Gotta plan for that marriage..marriage can definitely get real!! Gotta make sure you have the tools needed to push through!!!!
You can tell that most people don't plan for the marriage because most don't even invest in premarital counseling yet they'll invest in 30k for a day.
Issa morning show topics apocalypse!
This is a beautiful conversation. Any one who brought negativity into this, please look at yourselves and why you feel the need to put something negative on the idea of two people in love. God bless
don’t plan for either…work on a plan to honor, respect and be loyal to your person because without those three parts the wedding or marriage is nothing‼️
Love these convos
Everybody puts work in on the wedding, but not the marriage😂👎🏾 don’t do it fellas
I’ve been giving advice to my younger friends for a while about this exact subject!! It’s a contract and business agreement! With that being said I’d never marry someone that I’m not in love with!!!
Jess aint know what she was saying.
Thats why she got stuck 😂😂😂
😂😂😂
That’s why she has 2 diff baby daddy’s 🤷♀️
Lord this hate is so lame
She knows very well what she's saying. She said from now going further she doesn't make moves just thinking about herself but the family. That's very big and intelligent.
Men plan for marriage. The female plans for the wedding and the exit. I digress my phone is muted.
I CONCURRRRRR
They won't like this truth. Lol I can already hear it, "Not all women are like that" Lol
Here to agree before they try to cook you 💯
I agree. As the person that benefits most from marriage Men are always planning the burdens & emotional labor they are going to impart upon their partner. As well as the prenuptial agreement to ensure the woman benefits minimally should it ends.
Very rarely do women anticipate what their life will become/what they’re signing up for. 💯
Lmao
Marriage bc I didn’t even have a wedding; we went to the courthouse. Two beautiful children now & celebrating 21 years in June!
May whoever sees this, be better than yesterday and blessed! ✨💕
Rel is on the right track. You plan for the marriage. Women we tend to want to go all out for 1 day but once that day is over reality kicks in marriage is no joke and if you go in right it will last.
A wedding is for everyone outside of your marriage, but the marriage is between the two people so you should definitely focus on the marriage. If planning for the wedding is more important, than you will always keep trying to impress others and let your marriage fall into shambles. I’ve been a bridesmaids a few times and there are brides I don’t even speak with anymore because they moved after they got married. Imagine how many more of those people that were at the wedding that they don’t see anymore. Having the stress and wasting money for a moment is not worth it. Just have something small and intimate and have a happier life/ marriage.
Why would you propose if you don't have an idea what the marriage might be like??? What a nonsense question.
Beautiful conversation
I’m happy me and my husband focused more on the marriage than the wedding. I lowkey had anxiety thinking about the wedding and almost eloped.
I still don’t regret having a church wedding without a reception, because we only spent $2k. We planned more for the future rather than the wedding
This is a solid discussion
What you really need to do is plan on staying committed no matter what. Both parties being committed to each other is what's going to make the marriage work. Not finances. Not family. commitment to each other is the only thing that's going to make a marriage work.
Destination weddings are the worst! Plan for the marriage ya'll!
I’m a caregiver to the elderly.
A man I care for was diagnosed with Parkinson’s disease in his late 30s. He and his wife had to adjust their lives accordingly real quick. … It wasn’t the marriage they signed up for.
When planning the marriage try to look all the way outside of the box. Conflict resolution. Family involvement. Illness. Etc.. etc…
Ironically none of the callers said they’re planning the wedding lmao
Right lol
He is so right!!!
I planned for the marriage. Wedding was small & beautiful. We were focused on our home.
In personal opinion the way society is today I don’t think marriage even makes sense to be honest with you you have to find the right person first does not a lot of marriage material out here but hey each to they own🤷🏾♂️
this is such a great topic, glad it was/is getting discussed
Y’all always end on some foolishness 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 god I love this show ❤❤❤❤
This was very eye opening and so real what do you plan for The wedding or the marriage,it is so refreshing that y'all are growing so much from mental health to black community love to what is best for us as a people .I am very proud and look forward to how and where y'all are taken us on this journey of growing and becoming proud bless black and wonderful people.Love what your doing keep growing and moving us to be healthy,loved, heal and just living each other
I believe the marriage should begin before the wedding because marriage is just an idea, and a wedding is just a ceremony. Marriage is a frame of mind of commitment, and we should be committed to our potential spouses well before any wedding takes place.
Envy should’ve added in his long inspirational marriage speech about keeping those cows scared and respecting each other…we should make sure we don’t run into Erica Mena too 👌🏼😂😂…
I’m definitely planning for marriage. I told my boyfriend-future husband that we’re going straight to the courthouse. I’m not interested in all of the other stuff. I don’t have to show off for anyone…I just want my husband & my kids = family! 🙌🏾🙏🏾🧡
God bless. Your screen name is dope too
@@sinematic06 Oh thank you. One of my all time favorite albums. 👐🏾🐝
Marriage is such a waste of time bruh. You take away the wedding and the ring and most women wouldn’t even care about marriage.
that's why he pull down his pants to fart...LLOLL!!!
I don’t even know why this is question. Marriage should the priority. Not the wedding.
Because most people got it backwards. Check the divorce rate. They say "til death do us part", but they mean, "until you dont make me happy no more"😂 sad tho
I think it is absolutely nuts that you plan for a 40K wedding but you have not gone to therapy as individuals and as a couple. And then after that go to couples counseling with your pastor. Marriage aint easy and you have to have all the tools to be as prepared as you need to be for this marathon.
Jezzy and Jeannie Mai should have done this.
Y’all couldn’t find a better pic of Rel?
😂😂😂😂😂
Weddings cost as much as u want. Let the money go towards Building a marriage and life.
Anonymous sounds like safari lol 😆 he talking bout Erika 😂
😂😂😂
Grandparents married 55 years, parents married 32 years, both no wedding.
Niceeee! My parents 42yrs, moms parents 62yrs & my Dads parents 65yrs, Husbands parents 34yrs...me 2.5yrs 😂
@@ItsBrittany. love it!!!!
Marriage, period
Neither. They both come with divorce 😂
Jess don't answer the question about the ring. Why are y'all gettin married if you DONT KNOW IF THE INDIVIDUAL IS WORTH THE COST. People are out here getting married just because y'all LOOK GOOD AS A COUPLE. But you're not equally yoked. You're values need to be aligned
Marriage… the primary factor in all divorces🤔Think about it
Neither 1
i always plan the escape route😂
Both, the marriage and the wedding. Repent the Kingdom is near, believers get ready for the Bridegroom.
Revelation 19:7 👑
“Let us rejoice and be glad and give Him the glory. For the marriage of the Lamb has come, and His bride has made herself ready”
As a male, if my woman is worried of the future when coming together for a marriage, Iam dropping her.
I ain't put all this effort for her to see me as a potential risk, wtf.
Sorry, get stepping
I used to think Yee was fine but this red nose pitbull some else ❤😍
Why is Envy kinda slow?
Does Jess have a bun in the back & a ponytail???
It won't matter soon. Marriage is becoming obsolete.
Women don't want men who they deem aren't worthy, and men don't want women who are ruled by avarice.
I think we will see the end of weddings and marriages by 2050.
People are learning that we are never on the same page. That's how I view it.
Jess isn’t getting married!!!
Half these people lying.. knowing damn well they all think it's the same thing 😂😂 70% of women want to get married for the wrong reasons
This mf was in FULL BLOWN DRAG can't take nothing he say seriously
Why is this an 'either-or' situation? Obviously, you do both.
Most women aint gone ever admit it but they plan for the wedding more then the marriage? Dont believe me? Ask any women how much should a wedding cost and how much should a wedding ring cost.
The majority are gonna say north of 4k
lol what wedding cost 4k? Renting a venue cost like 20k. Food and drinks is another 10-20k. Then you talk about the dress she’s gonna wear and her ring lol.
I don’t think you understand what the question is about because you’re focused on the cost of the ceremony as well lol, my apologies if you’re a woman
😂😂😂broooo were this fart crap come from broooo
Ya'll could of ended this great Topic of discussion without that Fart conversation at the end
Isn’t this common sense?
Marriage is a covenant made established and kept by God. I think people should follow the Creator's directions for marriage.
Or, or......just don't get married
Read your Bible on marriage
Question: How do you plan for marriage?
Answer: PRE-MARITAL COUNSELING
Women 😂plan wedding & men plan marriage, However you gotta come together at end of the day and communicate and follow the lead of which ever plan your speak on and compromise & & black ladies you should be chasing marriage instead of bf or babydad, your a queen & a leader do better & black man will comply/follow/adjust.. Only you can save black communities around the world
Do we know the difference??? 🤔
Unfortunately, most of us cappin', we can't actually plan for the marriage today, bcuz we already have FAMILIES! No, we plan for the FAMILY; the marriage is the obstacle course of making a family work. They (The Idealistic) plan the hell out of a wedding; just look at how long the average "marriage" last in this 21st century.
Neither. Both Marriage and Weddings are pointless these days for men 🤷♀️. Men have alot to lose and nothing to gain from getting married.
If you don’t plan on building a family Yee. If you’re not having kids there’s no point of getting married.
@@Ac3Badger having kids ≠ getting married bub. You can't stop people from procreating.
Most women it’s just a wedding
Politics, economics, reproduction
If we being real:
Women plan for the wedding
Men ?
Marriage in america is dead. Guys, dont be stupid. We marry for love women marry for financially means.
Her hairline is receding? Question!
This is a dumb as question
Also….STOP HAVING CHILDREN OUTTA WEDLOCK!
His fiancee is a strong believer in Jesus Christ, he’s blessed. I pray he repents.
Romans 10:9-13
Marriage is trash🎉🎉🎉🎉
Yall comparing the color of the sky to the density of a droplet of water. Like what are yall even talking about…two totally different things
Why is he so skinny now?
Why is that even a question? You should only be planning for the marriage