@@TheLowbob55 My son Autism, which is not well fits in the general society cause me extreme trauma, but I have never thought that he himself has that issue or not. So it is a great question from you to Jessica Jones. Note: when ask him if he is ok or not, he always say he is ok. Currently attending University. Smart, intelligent, innovative, but has great difficulties to socialize, and sometimes it is a problem when comes to marking achievement, where communication matters. The noisier are on the winner end even if their knowledge is less. That is his disadvantage to my frustration as a father. We are great friends, but since I am 70, cannot be there for him long enough. Makes me helpless.
On the topic of love and the expressions of love, a book called the 5 love languages by Gary Chapman is wonderful to help expand understanding of expressions other than hugs and other forms of affection. On cheering the diagnosis: My 5yo was just diagnosed 5 days ago and I asked the psychologist to high-five. He said no one wants to high-five at this point and I answered quietly, "I do". My logic was that if diagnosed autistic then my son is normal; his "quirks" & flappy arms & misunderstanding many a thing are not as weird as people have acted like they are, but rather completely normal. We baked a cake the next day to celebrate! It was a wonderful event ❤
This is really the most phenomenal, eye-opening lecture. I thought I'd already absorbed all the information about this subject, but I learned so many valuable things from your lecture. Thank you so much.
Thank you so much for your lecture. All of the details you discussed about people on the spectrum is initiating me looking into getting a diagnosis as an adult female. The items that especially resonated were the scariness of small talk, the uncomfortable female social gatherings in forced situations (the obligatory beer and Barbeque is equally drole), the realization that I could read other people's emotions but not my own...the sensation of feeling empty, but not quite depressed unless told it was wrong to feel nothing...and getting in trouble in various situations because I did not appear emotional enough, as if I did not care...the feeling of exhaustion after being in loud and bright places with millions of people and not knowing to whom to listen...to even learning how to focus on people their mouths, and perhaps memorizing the weave of their sweater if their topic of conversation was so incredibly boring, that even turning to the carpet for better topics seemed more useful. I have not studied latin much, but I can associate your happiness with being able to complete tree diagrams labeling parts of speech in Spanish and English, comparing the conjugations of the various tenses in French and Spanish, etc. I gave you more spoon points due to the fact you incorporated star trek, star wars, world of war craft, and anime. I appreciate your work, because trying to come out to friends and family...I am realizing how many people know nothing or have a wrong vague idea about autism and what it could be like on the spectrum. I can show them these videos to hopefully give them a better understanding...after all, we are the same people that we were before the label. Thank you, and I look forward to seeing more of your work!
Just a little heads up. You female Aspies " pass " as normal much more than us men, which explains the historically low rates of diagnosis. This DOESN'T come without cost, many female Aspies suffer psychological problems as a result of trying really hard for decades to pretend to be what they are not. Be yourself, and the not-true friends will drift off, but the true friends will stick around. Which is like losing the quartze but keeping the diamonds. From what you wrote I can confidently say that you are Aspie, however getting a diagnosis can be much more difficult and drawn-out than you might expect. You don't need a diagnosis to "come out " though; any time I'm in a job or a study course I let everyone know, and it works out really well. Why are the NT's so reluctant to diagnose us ? I don't know. I've spent half my life studying NT psychology, but I haven't worked that one out yet. Hope this helps.
I have exactly the same experience after having watched this lecture. suddenly i get so many things that went wrong for reasons that i did not get at the time. or even things i thought went well, but now I suddenly realize they probably meant something completely different and the situation actually didn't go well at all and I was clueless. And all those times I was getting exhausted and irritated and overstimulated at parties while all the others seemed to be enjoying themselves. and so on...
@@sciencetroll6304 It's because they really aren't able to pay attention to the detail of things, the same way that we are able to. I haven't been diagnosed, but I'm more than positive that I am on the spectrum. I've only been diagnosed with having ADHD, and being bipolar. I made really good grades and wasn't hyper active as a child, so I guess nothing about me was ever identified. The ADHD wasn't diagnosed until I was 30 yrs old... and that was "also" found by me. The Bipolar diagnosis was received earlier this year. While I was stressed and coping with the passing away of a number of my friends and cousins, that happened in a short span of time to each other. While I was in that very dark place, I had a bad meltdown on my mother, and was taken to a hospital. Then within three to four minutes... was diagnosed as Bipolar and being manic at the moment... According to the "Doctor" that never paid attention or listened to anything that I or anyone else ever said. When I asked him, why none of my other psychiatrist over the past few years had ever came up with such a diagnosis. He only responded that he was, very good... so go figure. I assume he was... the typical... neurotypical. Moving around quickly, talking and laughing a lot... and never actually "seeing" any of the things, that "need" to be seen. Dr. Iain McGilchrist's book, "The Master and his Emissary" really begins to make sense of all of this... As far as I'm concerned at least. It really shines light on what has happened in the past, is happening right now, and will continue to happen again and again... as long as this "Pattern"... isn't recognized. And why "we" are the so called problem or outliers. I think that many of us on the spectrum... are just INFJ, INTJ, and other introverted personality types. Im still drawing a blank, as to Why Dr. Jung's work has been so heavily ignored... the world may never know. I have my thoughts, on why it would have been convenient for them to try and sweep him under a rug, the same way they did Nikola Tesla... But that's a topic, for another conversation. Lol
thanks for this lecture, it was making so many things clear for me. "I am going to get my diagnosis!" (if i finally figure out how I am suppose to make the required telephone call to make an appointment... - mostly a matter of finding the courage to engage in some potentially awkward telephone calls that will hopefully get me to my goal of finally being officially recognized as thinking differently. I wish that all the combined awkward social situations would have gotten me the label already... - i am not looking forward to all the required testing - )
I recommended this excellent lecture to my wife, in hope that she learn to understand me. But she didn't take the time and decided to split up instead after 20 years, because "I don't understand her and don't give her the support she wants".
Its funny how when I tell others how much truth a proper diagnosis has. And when they say "it shouldn't matter". It shouldnt, for them, but for me it does. Its stalled my life. I can't move forward with this facade.
You, sir, are brilliant. All the little nuances you explain with such detail are helping me understand our differences so I can learn to be more patient and understanding of a couple of people in my life who I find quite puzzling at times. I’m an NT and after listening to my very close friends experience with her boyfriend of three years who is on the spectrum I began to suspect a couple of people I’m close with might be as well. Thanks so much.
These two videos are absolutely brilliant. Thank you so much. I wish you had, had time to talk more about the slides near the end. I am not sure now if I am neurotypical or autistic. I have close relatives who are diagnosed and I give a post diagnosis support session with another lady, for parents whose children have recently been diagnosed. Often we get asked "How do I tell my child that they are autistic? " I think that though it may seem to be likely to be too long, (if you look at the duration of each film before watching,) that your positive anti neurist explanations of the differences between neurotypicals and autistics, will give a lot of help with this. I found the talk both entertaining and informative. Do you write any books? I will share this with many people who will benefit from it. Thank you again, I have already sent the link to family members and some freinds.
I'm going to see if I'm autistic very soon and I was like "but was I very autistic as a child? I loved playing with dolls and sometimes very much enjoyed playing pretend, specifically pretending to be animals or a parent" but very suddenly realised when he said "HOW do they play with dolls" and it just clicked. As much as I liked playing pretend, I got extremely stimulated and spent a lot of time just organizing my stuffed animals, I built my Lego, I organized all my barbies, their clothes and their shoes (my mom has always bragged how I was so precise with their shoes and lined them up PERFECTLY). I built an ENTIRE city with coloured mud or whatever is it. I could spend hours and days doing that but for example pretending to be a parent I just stopped after an hour. This could easily just be a personality trait and I'm only looking from my memory from a certain age but worth bringing up. Thank you for bringing up this perspective.
Bravo. This has been the most comprehensive comparison I've come across between individuals like myself (self realized Aspie ; never been diagnosed) and the general neurotypical population.
Thanks so much for this lecture. 53 years old and just figuring out that the reason that I have never fit in the NT world. I don't like eye contact or being touched in certain ways as my touch nerves are over sensitive. I have found my nitch in life consisting of building hot rods and custom cars. I'm quite creative and like building one off designs and custom parts. I am easily overwhelmed with tasks but if they are broken up onto small jobs then no problem. A complete car is overwhelming but each bit is not. At 40 I got a job building hot rods and each small job was documented with the time clock this had the effect of narrowed focus and increased productivity without being overwhelmed by the job.
My family’s way of expressing love is making and offering foods and essential gifts. It feels awkward to buy a fluffy present or to go buy presents altogether. I have a hard time picking presents, I rather just give cash or gift certificates.
I wish he hadn't rushed thru the 5 slides of asc identity. I have to screen shot them for mire study, but they are awesome (which is why I wished he'd discussed them). I will be sharing that collection of info because I've been searching for it for a long time.
Absolutely excellent lecture. So interesting and relatable for me as a parent of someone with a diagnosis and also some non-NT traits myself. Thank you.
In olden times I would have been the weird lady on the edge of town selling ailment fixes to the villagers and helping them with all their petty problems, and then would be unlucky enough to have one of them decide that I should be burned as a witch simply out of spite.
I can relate to that. I have realized that I would likely have been a shaman,witch,or healer...and probably would have been killed as a suspicious character because it is hard for me, especially as a woman, to be like other people. I can't do it
Oh, me too... I have a cat, a dog, two rabbits and a garden. I am 36 year old women who never had children and I lake helping people, but I don't know how to socialize and it is very stresfull for me. So sometimes I see myself as some kind of witch....
I very much enjoyed the speaker's humor throughout the presentation and am surprised not to hear more laughter from the audience in response to the jokes. Could it be that such proliferation of humor and wit in that specific setting is unexpected or even considered inappropriate?
Not inappropriate - I give lectures of this type quite frequently, and many tell me that the humorous angles are much appreciated - but possibly unexpected. However, the vast majority of the audience is Swedish, and although they are good at English, it is still by no means their native language. The Swedes are much more responsive when I lecture in Swedish, so my best guess is that the language barrier is to blame.
My question is: What if your children are neurotypical? I don't know if I'm on the spectrum, but (for many reasons that I won't go into here) I know that I am not neurotypical. I recently had a daughter, who is 8 months old at the time of writing this, and I worry about how I will raise her to properly function within neurotypical society when I myself have failed at that venture. Is it just something normal people understand by their nature? Or have I set her up for failure? Further, I learned everything I know about socializing from observing my own mother and from reading fiction. Well, I'm decent at seeming competent in social interactions on the surface, but once I've become known to others the facade begins to fade as they realize all the little details I haven't quite polished, so it won't be that beneficial to her to observe me. From the lips of my former classmates, I am forever known as "that weird girl," although they were polite enough to never let me know (deceptive enough, in my own opinion, although I realize they believed themselves to be polite in not disclosing to me that they were apprehensive of me) and I was none the wiser until I heard it from someone else that I was referred to that way. I don't want her saddled with that burden. It would be much easier if she was also different and I could teach her all I've learned about functioning as if I were normal, and tell her where she might improve where I have failed. Better yet, I might be able to teach her to embrace herself for who she is even if others perceive her way of viewing the world to be a bit odd.
This has been so helpful to me in checking how well, or maybe not so well, at how I cope socially. Also, I refuse to go on feeling so weird around people I don’t know well. 🤪
Hi, Christian! Thank you for your interesting talk! OK, you make autistic people sound robotic about emotional cues, yet mention that some have overwhelm and complex sending of the cues. Isn't that the opposite difference/ problem? Of course, it would mean they have to learn to separate those cues, slow them down, cut off, shall we say, making them more like other, more socially robotic autistic people, but under it would be natural advantage, if they marry their sensitivity with analytic advantage? Or am I misunderstanding what you meant? Thanks. And your English is lovely.
Thank you very much for this lecture. I am married to a man who clearly has AS. We've been together for 9 yrs and just recently I have started to vaguely understand him... I would wish that there was more info about how to have a fullfilling relationship between an aspie and a N/T.
Theres actually quite a few videos about it. Probably some articles. Maybe some forums or support groups to learn. Theres one talk about specifically about relationships from a woman with autism (who got diagnosed at age 40 and didn't really understand she had autism but whose husband did have it). A relationship with an autistic person is not more difficult, just different. It only becomes difficult when you're looking at it like a "normal" relationship. Wish u the best of luck :) seems successful since it's been 9 years at least
Utterly fascinating and illuminating! I think I may be Aspergers. I've done all the online tests I can find with high scores for all... Spent the past hundred hours researching this to death (haha!) One question: I am a chronic liar (only realised recently and trying to break the habit with moderate success) but does this rule out an ASD diagnosis? I think I do it to appear 'normal', to be interesting and more popular - but also suffer extremely low self-esteem so do it to hide my many and repeated failings.
jpfrazer69 I too find myself constantly lying, not because I'm evil but because I'm used to making up excuses and stories in in order to try and fit into society. Its become a habit, a really bad one.
Geraldine Burns that sounds like a massive generalisation! I think I started lieing simply to fit in as mentioned above. But also been wondering to what extent I was lieing (including exaggeration, embellishment and white lies) because everyone else seems to!
jpfrazer69: very interesting! I also used to constantly lie, exaggerate etc. it was sort of weird how I was able to stop doing it once I fully realized that I did that. I also was a bit intrigued as to why. I sort of changes it all around 180 degrees in a very short period of time because I became quite intrigued with the "truth". Now it's almost crazy how I honestly cannot tell even the simplest of "untruths". I simply cannot even though it think one up fast enough even if I REALLY NEED ONE for my personal safety. Weird! I think it was just a switch from one obsessive mindset to its exact opposite.
Thankyou. - for Your Copious Time dedicated toward these awkward / inter grueling topics You’ve covered , most methodology & thoroughly !! Even though I’ve been studying quantum physics & like Einstein believe in an inter-connecting system via Blackholes in space&Time . Until proven the thesis may turn over in our Life time where the Glandular strikes the hour opening for a short window of human time the straight then twisting off vortex connection with another Galaxy passing through around our Solar’s outer orbit ⚙️⚙️⚙️⚙️⚙️☀️💫
40:00 Social interaction the touching that would change now with COVID but this filmed before 2020 and social distancing. The permission for friendly touching is a positive to the autism community with this pandemic.
Thank you very much for this information! What might be some hobbies and jobs a person with aspergers traits would have been inclined to prior the computer era?
I’m a train driver. I suspect a hugely disproportionate number of my colleagues are (undiagnosed) ASD. Engineering is another career path that favours an autistic mindset. Draughtsmen, archivists , ledger clerks; all jobs that suit people with an obsessive eye for detail.
Electronics was one of my special interests, analogue rather than digital. I don't think many 16 year olds could draw you a specimen circuit for a telly in the way I could back then. I think we have always been over-represented among the railway enthusiasts.and modellers.
Das wäre mir eine Ehre und Freude!! Als Kind habe ich anderthalb Jahre in Frankfurt am Main gelebt, und ich würde diese Perspektiven sehr gerne auch in Deutschland verbreiten.
Good video. ''Ab honesto virum bonum nihil deterret''. Feel free to point out any spelling mistakes, if there are - Latin isn't my first language. But please get this straight - Edison wasn't the great man some make him out to be (not very nice in fact - he used puppies to test his direct current) It is Nicola Tesla's electricity that we use - he was an Aspie and a genius.
So I don't know if this will be answered but I believe I'm on the spectrum though I share the interest that females do and I tend to act in the world as they do also. I also have a strong focus on philosophy, anime, and psychology. I think this might have been the reason that I have not been noticed by mental health specialist. Is this an actually possibility?
Yes, definitely! For a brief spell, autism professionals were talking about the female or girls' profile, but (just as was the case with anorexia, which was considered a girls' thing, until anorectic boys were discovered!) we are seeing an increasing number of boys/men with a leaning towards the "soft" profile (for want of a better term) - myself included, by the way! (I sometimes meet people who are confused at the appearance of an autistic psychologist - I confess to enjoying rattling their cages by reframing my job in this fashion: "Well, only on the surface - you see, the human mind is actually a software system, so in truth, I work with computer programmes. The only difference is, I work with software operated by biological rather than electronic hardware. But hey, tomatoes/tomatoes, right?" ;-) )
@@ChristianStewartFerrer ahhh ok. I have also been able to hold about 120 pounds at 6 feet tall my entire life with very little fluctuations. Even working out 130 is about my max and when life is going wrong I've dropped to about 105.
Mr. Stewart, thank you for this wonderful video. I appreciate your unique, and informative perspective on autism. I am 54 years old and reached an official diagnosis one year ago. Always knew that I was different and social activity was always tiring and I lived many years of my life as a loner. I actually worked with severe autistic children before retirement but never realized that I was/on the spectrum, myself. Loved your thoughts on how our group is actually intelligent and gifted. Wrong planet...lol. I can relate.. Great lecture! You offer encouragement and validation. Thank you, again I have to add one more thing. Your mention of religion made me want to say that I am one of Jehovah's Witnesses. We are known worldwide for our door to door ministry. I believe with all of my being that I have found the truth with my extensive study of the Bible. This religion is one of ongoing education, with a loving worldwide brotherhood of dedicated individuals.The Bible is "my" special interest. I would like to share this website for other inquisitive truthlovers:... www.jw.org
Left handed underhanded broken sinister wicked or having no conscious And no we do not be gay. Anyone who does not repent for their lasciviousness will be cast out into outer darkness
By the way, gravity is not a law, rather, it is a theory, unproven at that. Scientist are unable to describe it or tell us what it is exactly. There is no proof, no test whatsoever. I believe that gravity is nonsense and that density and buoyancy do a more than adequate job of explaining what goes up also comes down
No gravity is a fact, it is the force that determines which direction is down. What it is is described in the theory of gravity. The law of gravity is the mathematical expression you can use to calculate the strength of gravity. Buoyancy cannot work without gravity. Density is just mass divided by volume. And mass relates to weight, which are different concepts, by the force of gravity. Mass is expressed in kilograms weight in Newtons.
great lecture, spot on. I wish someone would of showed me this video 20 years ago, it would of saved me from a lot of extreme trauma.
what kind of extreme trauma are you talking about?
I think there is the problem with practical implications of time travel...especially with traveling to the past.
@@TheLowbob55 My son Autism, which is not well fits in the general society cause me extreme trauma, but I have never thought that he himself has that issue or not. So it is a great question from you to Jessica Jones. Note: when ask him if he is ok or not, he always say he is ok. Currently attending University. Smart, intelligent, innovative, but has great difficulties to socialize, and sometimes it is a problem when comes to marking achievement, where communication matters. The noisier are on the winner end even if their knowledge is less. That is his disadvantage to my frustration as a father. We are great friends, but since I am 70, cannot be there for him long enough. Makes me helpless.
Same
this is a masterpiece, thank you for sharing on youtube.
On the topic of love and the expressions of love, a book called the 5 love languages by Gary Chapman is wonderful to help expand understanding of expressions other than hugs and other forms of affection.
On cheering the diagnosis:
My 5yo was just diagnosed 5 days ago and I asked the psychologist to high-five. He said no one wants to high-five at this point and I answered quietly, "I do".
My logic was that if diagnosed autistic then my son is normal; his "quirks" & flappy arms & misunderstanding many a thing are not as weird as people have acted like they are, but rather completely normal.
We baked a cake the next day to celebrate! It was a wonderful event ❤
This is really the most phenomenal, eye-opening lecture. I thought I'd already absorbed all the information about this subject, but I learned so many valuable things from your lecture. Thank you so much.
Thank you so much for your lecture. All of the details you discussed about people on the spectrum is initiating me looking into getting a diagnosis as an adult female. The items that especially resonated were the scariness of small talk, the uncomfortable female social gatherings in forced situations (the obligatory beer and Barbeque is equally drole), the realization that I could read other people's emotions but not my own...the sensation of feeling empty, but not quite depressed unless told it was wrong to feel nothing...and getting in trouble in various situations because I did not appear emotional enough, as if I did not care...the feeling of exhaustion after being in loud and bright places with millions of people and not knowing to whom to listen...to even learning how to focus on people their mouths, and perhaps memorizing the weave of their sweater if their topic of conversation was so incredibly boring, that even turning to the carpet for better topics seemed more useful. I have not studied latin much, but I can associate your happiness with being able to complete tree diagrams labeling parts of speech in Spanish and English, comparing the conjugations of the various tenses in French and Spanish, etc. I gave you more spoon points due to the fact you incorporated star trek, star wars, world of war craft, and anime. I appreciate your work, because trying to come out to friends and family...I am realizing how many people know nothing or have a wrong vague idea about autism and what it could be like on the spectrum. I can show them these videos to hopefully give them a better understanding...after all, we are the same people that we were before the label. Thank you, and I look forward to seeing more of your work!
Do it. It really helped explain all the frustrations from growing up.
Just a little heads up. You female Aspies " pass " as normal much more than us men, which explains the historically low rates of diagnosis. This DOESN'T come without cost, many female Aspies suffer psychological problems as a result of trying really hard for decades to pretend to be what they are not. Be yourself, and the not-true friends will drift off, but the true friends will stick around. Which is like losing the quartze but keeping the diamonds. From what you wrote I can confidently say that you are Aspie, however getting a diagnosis can be much more difficult and drawn-out than you might expect. You don't need a diagnosis to "come out " though; any time I'm in a job or a study course I let everyone know, and it works out really well. Why are the NT's so reluctant to diagnose us ? I don't know. I've spent half my life studying NT psychology, but I haven't worked that one out yet. Hope this helps.
If you read others' emotions but not your own, is that autism?
I have exactly the same experience after having watched this lecture. suddenly i get so many things that went wrong for reasons that i did not get at the time. or even things i thought went well, but now I suddenly realize they probably meant something completely different and the situation actually didn't go well at all and I was clueless. And all those times I was getting exhausted and irritated and overstimulated at parties while all the others seemed to be enjoying themselves. and so on...
@@sciencetroll6304 It's because they really aren't able to pay attention to the detail of things, the same way that we are able to.
I haven't been diagnosed, but I'm more than positive that I am on the spectrum.
I've only been diagnosed with having ADHD, and being bipolar.
I made really good grades and wasn't hyper active as a child, so I guess nothing about me was ever identified.
The ADHD wasn't diagnosed until I was 30 yrs old... and that was "also" found by me.
The Bipolar diagnosis was received earlier this year. While I was stressed and coping with the passing away of a number of my friends and cousins, that happened in a short span of time to each other.
While I was in that very dark place, I had a bad meltdown on my mother, and was taken to a hospital.
Then within three to four minutes... was diagnosed as Bipolar and being manic at the moment...
According to the "Doctor" that never paid attention or listened to anything that I or anyone else ever said.
When I asked him, why none of my other psychiatrist over the past few years had ever came up with such a diagnosis.
He only responded that he was, very good... so go figure.
I assume he was... the typical... neurotypical.
Moving around quickly, talking and laughing a lot... and never actually "seeing" any of the things, that "need" to be seen.
Dr. Iain McGilchrist's book, "The Master and his Emissary" really begins to make sense of all of this... As far as I'm concerned at least.
It really shines light on what has happened in the past, is happening right now, and will continue to happen again and again... as long as this "Pattern"... isn't recognized.
And why "we" are the so called problem or outliers.
I think that many of us on the spectrum... are just INFJ, INTJ, and other introverted personality types.
Im still drawing a blank, as to Why Dr. Jung's work has been so heavily ignored... the world may never know.
I have my thoughts, on why it would have been convenient for them to try and sweep him under a rug, the same way they did Nikola Tesla...
But that's a topic, for another conversation. Lol
thanks for this lecture, it was making so many things clear for me.
"I am going to get my diagnosis!" (if i finally figure out how I am suppose to make the required telephone call to make an appointment... - mostly a matter of finding the courage to engage in some potentially awkward telephone calls that will hopefully get me to my goal of finally being officially recognized as thinking differently. I wish that all the combined awkward social situations would have gotten me the label already... - i am not looking forward to all the required testing - )
You'd think offices serving those on the spectrum would allow for emailing instead lol
I recommended this excellent lecture to my wife, in hope that she learn to understand me. But she didn't take the time and decided to split up instead after 20 years, because "I don't understand her and don't give her the support she wants".
Its funny how when I tell others how much truth a proper diagnosis has. And when they say "it shouldn't matter". It shouldnt, for them, but for me it does. Its stalled my life. I can't move forward with this facade.
You, sir, are brilliant. All the little nuances you explain with such detail are helping me understand our differences so I can learn to be more patient and understanding of a couple of people in my life who I find quite puzzling at times. I’m an NT and after listening to my very close friends experience with her boyfriend of three years who is on the spectrum I began to suspect a couple of people I’m close with might be as well. Thanks so much.
Looking at their eyes overloads me with information so I get from them, it’s better to look somewhere else, it doesn’t overload me .
Oh, same for me
I am finding myself nodding in agreement often...
Yes, me too!
These two videos are absolutely brilliant. Thank you so much. I wish you had, had time to talk more about the slides near the end. I am not sure now if I am neurotypical or autistic. I have close relatives who are diagnosed and I give a post diagnosis support session with another lady, for parents whose children have recently been diagnosed. Often we get asked "How do I tell my child that they are autistic? " I think that though it may seem to be likely to be too long, (if you look at the duration of each film before watching,) that your positive anti neurist explanations of the differences between neurotypicals and autistics, will give a lot of help with this. I found the talk both entertaining and informative. Do you write any books? I will share this with many people who will benefit from it. Thank you again, I have already sent the link to family members and some freinds.
I'm going to see if I'm autistic very soon and I was like "but was I very autistic as a child? I loved playing with dolls and sometimes very much enjoyed playing pretend, specifically pretending to be animals or a parent" but very suddenly realised when he said "HOW do they play with dolls" and it just clicked. As much as I liked playing pretend, I got extremely stimulated and spent a lot of time just organizing my stuffed animals, I built my Lego, I organized all my barbies, their clothes and their shoes (my mom has always bragged how I was so precise with their shoes and lined them up PERFECTLY). I built an ENTIRE city with coloured mud or whatever is it. I could spend hours and days doing that but for example pretending to be a parent I just stopped after an hour. This could easily just be a personality trait and I'm only looking from my memory from a certain age but worth bringing up. Thank you for bringing up this perspective.
Bravo. This has been the most comprehensive comparison I've come across between individuals like myself (self realized Aspie ; never been diagnosed) and the general neurotypical population.
thanks for the lecture, i´m an austrian asperger and it helps when someone can formulate what happens in an asperger´s mind
My profound thanks to you for this. God bless you.
Finally i have been enlightened life all makes sense now i can't thank you enough.
Thanks so much for this lecture. 53 years old and just figuring out that the reason that I have never fit in the NT world. I don't like eye contact or being touched in certain ways as my touch nerves are over sensitive. I have found my nitch in life consisting of building hot rods and custom cars. I'm quite creative and like building one off designs and custom parts. I am easily overwhelmed with tasks but if they are broken up onto small jobs then no problem. A complete car is overwhelming but each bit is not. At 40 I got a job building hot rods and each small job was documented with the time clock this had the effect of narrowed focus and increased productivity without being overwhelmed by the job.
This was a wonderful and very humorous portrayal of the ASD and NT views of the world.
My family’s way of expressing love is making and offering foods and essential gifts. It feels awkward to buy a fluffy present or to go buy presents altogether. I have a hard time picking presents, I rather just give cash or gift certificates.
I wish he hadn't rushed thru the 5 slides of asc identity. I have to screen shot them for mire study, but they are awesome (which is why I wished he'd discussed them). I will be sharing that collection of info because I've been searching for it for a long time.
What time in this video are you referring to? I only listened to the talk, but would like to see these slides too
aresvepe I will have to watch it again, the screen shots are on a different device and I don't recall which one.
Oh, thanks anyway!
@@aresvepe 1:35:33 is the time-stamp you're looking for, I think. They pass in a flash. I screen-shotted them to study.
Absolutely excellent lecture. So interesting and relatable for me as a parent of someone with a diagnosis and also some non-NT traits myself. Thank you.
Agreed, this is informative, helpful, insightful.
In olden times I would have been the weird lady on the edge of town selling ailment fixes to the villagers and helping them with all their petty problems, and then would be unlucky enough to have one of them decide that I should be burned as a witch simply out of spite.
I can relate to that.
I have realized that I would likely have been a shaman,witch,or healer...and probably would have been killed as a suspicious character because it is hard for me, especially as a woman, to be like other people. I can't do it
Oh, me too... I have a cat, a dog, two rabbits and a garden. I am 36 year old women who never had children and I lake helping people, but I don't know how to socialize and it is very stresfull for me. So sometimes I see myself as some kind of witch....
It's interesting how he bombed at trying to be funny but I like his humour
I thought he was hilarious. Must have been too many NT in the audience. ASC would have gotten the jokes.
@@valcwf551 Or the audience is autistic and therefore enjoys the jokes without ruining the talk by getting loud.
He just identified why I prefer to talk to people in person instead of on the phone.
Why isn't anybody laughing? He is so funny🤣
Fatma Gül Aspie humour in front a audience of NT.
A sense of humour clash.
Fantastic, enjoyed this very much!
Amazing, so important to hear and delivered soo well. Humour is on point 👌 thank you
Really good Presentation
I very much enjoyed the speaker's humor throughout the presentation and am surprised not to hear more laughter from the audience in response to the jokes. Could it be that such proliferation of humor and wit in that specific setting is unexpected or even considered inappropriate?
Not inappropriate - I give lectures of this type quite frequently, and many tell me that the humorous angles are much appreciated - but possibly unexpected.
However, the vast majority of the audience is Swedish, and although they are good at English, it is still by no means their native language. The Swedes are much more responsive when I lecture in Swedish, so my best guess is that the language barrier is to blame.
@@ChristianStewartFerrer That makes sense. Thank you for responding.
@@ChristianStewartFerrer No, it's the NT-barrier. NT's are seldom comfortable with Star Trek metaphors.
enjoyable lecture. My childhood treehouse had mains power, lights, and a TV.
Postal workers…brilliant. Schedule, route, familiar, solo.
I love his ceiling painting metaphor
Genius, priceless, insightful,...
Thank you
Thank you very much for sharing and
all the best to you!!
It broke my heart when he said Nds have to learn to lie. My Si is astrology
I figured that stuff out as a kid. But I am a leo whatever that means.
Lovely man to listen to and learn from.
My question is:
What if your children are neurotypical?
I don't know if I'm on the spectrum, but (for many reasons that I won't go into here) I know that I am not neurotypical.
I recently had a daughter, who is 8 months old at the time of writing this, and I worry about how I will raise her to properly function within neurotypical society when I myself have failed at that venture.
Is it just something normal people understand by their nature? Or have I set her up for failure?
Further, I learned everything I know about socializing from observing my own mother and from reading fiction. Well, I'm decent at seeming competent in social interactions on the surface, but once I've become known to others the facade begins to fade as they realize all the little details I haven't quite polished, so it won't be that beneficial to her to observe me.
From the lips of my former classmates, I am forever known as "that weird girl," although they were polite enough to never let me know (deceptive enough, in my own opinion, although I realize they believed themselves to be polite in not disclosing to me that they were apprehensive of me) and I was none the wiser until I heard it from someone else that I was referred to that way.
I don't want her saddled with that burden. It would be much easier if she was also different and I could teach her all I've learned about functioning as if I were normal, and tell her where she might improve where I have failed. Better yet, I might be able to teach her to embrace herself for who she is even if others perceive her way of viewing the world to be a bit odd.
This has been so helpful to me in checking how well, or maybe not so well, at how I cope socially. Also, I refuse to go on feeling so weird around people I don’t know well. 🤪
Hi, Christian! Thank you for your interesting talk! OK, you make autistic people sound robotic about emotional cues, yet mention that some have overwhelm and complex sending of the cues. Isn't that the opposite difference/ problem? Of course, it would mean they have to learn to separate those cues, slow them down, cut off, shall we say, making them more like other, more socially robotic autistic people, but under it would be natural advantage, if they marry their sensitivity with analytic advantage? Or am I misunderstanding what you meant? Thanks. And your English is lovely.
Amazing information
Very good he covers it all Thankyou
I see being on the spectrum to be a gift! It’s good to not be “typical” now.
Thank u for not running away screaming
Thank you very much for this lecture. I am married to a man who clearly has AS. We've been together for 9 yrs and just recently I have started to vaguely understand him... I would wish that there was more info about how to have a fullfilling relationship between an aspie and a N/T.
Theres actually quite a few videos about it. Probably some articles. Maybe some forums or support groups to learn. Theres one talk about specifically about relationships from a woman with autism (who got diagnosed at age 40 and didn't really understand she had autism but whose husband did have it).
A relationship with an autistic person is not more difficult, just different. It only becomes difficult when you're looking at it like a "normal" relationship.
Wish u the best of luck :) seems successful since it's been 9 years at least
Utterly fascinating and illuminating! I think I may be Aspergers. I've done all the online tests I can find with high scores for all... Spent the past hundred hours researching this to death (haha!) One question: I am a chronic liar (only realised recently and trying to break the habit with moderate success) but does this rule out an ASD diagnosis? I think I do it to appear 'normal', to be interesting and more popular - but also suffer extremely low self-esteem so do it to hide my many and repeated failings.
jpfrazer69 I too find myself constantly lying, not because I'm evil but because I'm used to making up excuses and stories in in order to try and fit into society. Its become a habit, a really bad one.
Aspies lie if it can get what they want.
Geraldine Burns that sounds like a massive generalisation! I think I started lieing simply to fit in as mentioned above. But also been wondering to what extent I was lieing (including exaggeration, embellishment and white lies) because everyone else seems to!
It does not rule out an ASD diagnosis, as it's not part of the diagnostic criteria.
jpfrazer69: very interesting! I also used to constantly lie, exaggerate etc. it was sort of weird how I was able to stop doing it once I fully realized that I did that. I also was a bit intrigued as to why. I sort of changes it all around 180 degrees in a very short period of time because I became quite intrigued with the "truth". Now it's almost crazy how I honestly cannot tell even the simplest of "untruths". I simply cannot even though it think one up fast enough even if I REALLY NEED ONE for my personal safety. Weird! I think it was just a switch from one obsessive mindset to its exact opposite.
Thankyou. - for Your Copious Time dedicated toward these awkward / inter grueling topics You’ve covered , most methodology & thoroughly !!
Even though I’ve been studying quantum physics & like Einstein believe in an inter-connecting system via Blackholes in space&Time . Until proven the
thesis may turn over in our Life time where the Glandular strikes the hour opening for a short window of human time the straight then twisting off vortex connection with another Galaxy passing through around our Solar’s outer orbit ⚙️⚙️⚙️⚙️⚙️☀️💫
What is the name of the painting at 1:39:05 ? Thanks
Found it. Doors album art. picclick.com/THE-DOORS-FULL-CIRCLE-Artist-Signed-John-Kosh-371334489686.html#&gid=1&pid=1
I can see autism and as a baseline for communication but not vice versa. How does autism get defined from normal communication?
40:00 Social interaction the touching that would change now with COVID but this filmed before 2020 and social distancing.
The permission for friendly touching is a positive to the autism community with this pandemic.
Absolutely love this guy
Half way through I realised Anthony Hopkins sounds like you
Thank you!
Thank you very much for this information! What might be some hobbies and jobs a person with aspergers traits would have been inclined to prior the computer era?
I’m a train driver. I suspect a hugely disproportionate number of my colleagues are (undiagnosed) ASD. Engineering is another career path that favours an autistic mindset. Draughtsmen, archivists , ledger clerks; all jobs that suit people with an obsessive eye for detail.
Electronics was one of my special interests, analogue rather than digital. I don't think many 16 year olds could draw you a specimen circuit for a telly in the way I could back then.
I think we have always been over-represented among the railway enthusiasts.and modellers.
1:07:20 just noticed the listening particle 😁 in the visual
May you ever hold a lecture in Germany?
Das wäre mir eine Ehre und Freude!! Als Kind habe ich anderthalb Jahre in Frankfurt am Main gelebt, und
ich würde diese Perspektiven sehr gerne auch in Deutschland verbreiten.
Good video. ''Ab honesto virum bonum nihil deterret''. Feel free to point out any spelling mistakes, if there are - Latin isn't my first language. But please get this straight - Edison wasn't the great man some make him out to be (not very nice in fact - he used puppies to test his direct current) It is Nicola Tesla's electricity that we use - he was an Aspie and a genius.
Inspiring.
Thank you.
Wonderful
So I don't know if this will be answered but I believe I'm on the spectrum though I share the interest that females do and I tend to act in the world as they do also. I also have a strong focus on philosophy, anime, and psychology. I think this might have been the reason that I have not been noticed by mental health specialist. Is this an actually possibility?
Yes, definitely! For a brief spell, autism professionals were talking about the female or girls' profile, but (just as was the case with anorexia, which was considered a girls' thing, until anorectic boys were discovered!) we are seeing an increasing number of boys/men with a leaning towards the "soft" profile (for want of a better term) - myself included, by the way!
(I sometimes meet people who are confused at the appearance of an autistic psychologist - I confess to enjoying rattling their cages by reframing my job in this fashion: "Well, only on the surface - you see, the human mind is actually a software system, so in truth, I work with computer programmes. The only difference is, I work with software operated by biological rather than electronic hardware. But hey, tomatoes/tomatoes, right?" ;-) )
@@ChristianStewartFerrer ahhh ok. I have also been able to hold about 120 pounds at 6 feet tall my entire life with very little fluctuations. Even working out 130 is about my max and when life is going wrong I've dropped to about 105.
Christian Stewart-Ferrer brilliant 😁!
Mr. Stewart, thank you for this wonderful video. I appreciate your unique, and informative perspective on autism. I am 54 years old and reached an official diagnosis one year ago. Always knew that I was different and social activity was always tiring and I lived many years of my life as a loner. I actually worked with severe autistic children before retirement but never realized that I was/on the spectrum, myself. Loved your thoughts on how our group is actually intelligent and gifted. Wrong planet...lol. I can relate.. Great lecture! You offer encouragement and validation. Thank you, again
I have to add one more thing. Your mention of religion made me want to say that I am one of Jehovah's Witnesses. We are known worldwide for our door to door ministry. I believe with all of my being that I have found the truth with my extensive study of the Bible. This religion is one of ongoing education, with a loving worldwide brotherhood of dedicated individuals.The Bible is "my" special interest. I would like to share this website for other inquisitive truthlovers:...
www.jw.org
Was that a sacred blanket at the end?
I need much more than an hour downtime
I would love to sit down snd chat with you. Wow. Do we meditate to satisfy others ???
The Comforter has Asperger's
I’m howling laughing
2:35 Homo sapıens Aspergensıs, why a joke? 2+2=4 A ıs A.
Left handed underhanded broken sinister wicked or having no conscious
And no we do not be gay.
Anyone who does not repent for their lasciviousness will be cast out into outer darkness
This flowers are annoying, why are they there?
Hand waving bothers me
Evolution us made ASPERGOID, that is us ... no need for Humanoids LOL .. We can better relate with OK Google and Siri as our friends LOL.
By the way, gravity is not a law, rather, it is a theory, unproven at that. Scientist are unable to describe it or tell us what it is exactly. There is no proof, no test whatsoever. I believe that gravity is nonsense and that density and buoyancy do a more than adequate job of explaining what goes up also comes down
No gravity is a fact, it is the force that determines which direction is down. What it is is described in the theory of gravity. The law of gravity is the mathematical expression you can use to calculate the strength of gravity. Buoyancy cannot work without gravity. Density is just mass divided by volume. And mass relates to weight, which are different concepts, by the force of gravity. Mass is expressed in kilograms weight in Newtons.
charging7 you are an idiot. Just stop.
I love his ceiling painting metaphor