Paul Zolman - Love Language Linguist

How Learning to Love Transformed One Man’s Life and Can Transform Yours
Paul Zolman discovered a profound way to learn all five love languages previously identified and written about by Dr. Gary Chapman to give them away.
By giving them away, your vision will improve to the point that you can see them coming your way and respond appropriately.
The system is so easy that even young children can be trained in this love giving system.
Paul’s journey of overcoming a childhood filled with anger and abuse through learning and practicing the five love languages is an inspiring story of personal transformation. Growing up as the youngest of 11 children during the Great Depression, Paul faced immense challenges including physical and emotional trauma passed down generationally. Struggling with anger issues that contributed to the demise of his first marriage, Paul was stuck in a cycle of blame until he decided to take responsibility for his own growth at age 35.
Seeking to replace his anger with more positive behaviors, Paul delved deeply into Gary Chapman’s five love languages, finding inspiration from its connection to the life of Jesus Christ. However, he struggled with its transactional approach until a breakthrough - creating a game using a die with the five love languages to practice expressing love to everyone he encountered without expectations of receiving it in return. Over 30 days, this simple practice changed Paul’s entire disposition, leaving no time for criticism as he focused on the good in others.
As co-hosts Walt and Anne-Marie discussed with Paul, judgments often say more about the person making them than their target. By asking questions like “Are you really going to do that?” without accusations, Paul learned to stay in his own lane while still addressing concerning behaviors. The group explored how focusing on flaws magnifies problems while focusing on strengths and virtues magnifies growth. Paul’s personal story illustrates the power of shifting one’s focus and attention through daily acts of love and kindness.
By keeping a “love journal” of opportunities seen and love expressed, Paul transformed what could have been complaints into a legacy of positive impact. His willingness to be vulnerable about past struggles and share his process inspires others facing generational trauma to overcome blame and take steps toward personal transformation one day at a time through the simple yet profound practice of spreading more love.
His website: roleoflove.com/
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