Callum will find out and he'll be there for Ben and support his husband like his mother in law Kathy Beale is doing for her son. Kathy loves Ben more than anything. She knows what it's like being a victim and survivor of rape and sexual assault. And so do I actually. Because I was raped twice by my adoptive father at the young ages of 3 and 4 and years later in 2016 I think. I was raped again and this time a pregnancy was a result of it and my little boy is a huge reminder of how I got pregnant with him. In 1998 or 1999 I think I can't remember the exact year because it was so long time ago. I was sexually abused by my biological father who's now dead. A huge police investigation was taken place and because of what my biological father did. It resulted in the end of his marriage to my stepmother. So yeah I have been where Ben is. And his mother Kathy too. I feel for Ben and how he's handling it. It's not good feeling so awful and horrible and dirty about it and carrying around that guilt feeling that it was your fault when it wasn't your fault. No means no. Ben said no but Lewis still did it to him. That's rape. And I definitely agree with Ben's mother Kathy Beale. Kathy was raped by Willmot-Brown because I remember watching the pain Kathy went through in the aftermath of after it happened. On my part. After the third time it happened to me. I couldn't check myself out. I wouldn't go to the hospital to get checked out nor let the police check me out. I was in too much pain. In so much pain that I wouldn't let anyone not even the hospital nurses or doctors or the police touch me because it hurt so much. And today I still feel that hurt inside whenever I tried having sex with my husband knowing that rape and sexual abuse ruined and destroyed every chance of me ever conceiving a baby ever again. And that my son was my only chance of pregnancy only because of what my son's biological father did to me. I have survived three rapes and one sexual abuse. And I have survived a domestic violence marriage too. My first marriage to my ex husband Peter was violent and abusive and controlling on my ex husband's part.
Oh Kathleen, I feel for you, you've been thru hell and these deep traumas especially at such a young age arent straight forward to heal are they. Thanks for sharing. I wish you all the best.
Him saying “I just wanted to feel another body” isn’t saying to me he was bored of Callum. It was more emphasising why he went upstairs to Lewis, and how everything went so wrong afterwards. He wanted to feel like how he did before Callum that night, because that is how he dealt with trauma beforehand. He and Callum fought, he wanted to self-sabotage his marriage and pay for it and hurt Callum in the process.
I think that saying “I’d never cheat on you” (and seriously, he meant it) and then going out actively looking for sex with someone else a few days later after what was for them a fairly standard row just points to the massive identity crisis Ben has been having since the attack on Callum. They were barely seeing each other, trying to maintain a sex life on an air bed in a flat with a granny and a baby. Ben clearly has ptsd from that attack and probably before that too, and in his mind he didn’t know if he wanted to be a happy, settled gay man with Callum, or go back to the former Ben of no strings fun. Perhaps due to his trauma that life appeared somewhat simpler and more carefree that trying to navigate a new identity. I don’t think he was bored with Callum, I don’t think he wanted someone else, the look on his face before he entered that room with Lewis said that. I think he wanted to know who he was again, and in that moment he saw the photo of Callum he knew exactly who he was and what he wanted. It was just too late. Just my take, but I don’t think he sees Callum as “same old predictable Callum” I think he sees him as the safety and security and love he so desperately wants, but others make him think he doesn’t deserve. I hope they sort things soon. No-one deserves to be happy like this pair, and for all their troubles they are far happier together than apart. I’m rooting for Callum to show Ben that.
I was so mad and upset last night at what Ben said, it felt so occ because the Ben of the night of the attack seemed a lot less for sleeping wit Lewis and more just wanting to drown his sorrows with someone who he believed got him. Ben IMO just looked sad and looked like he was having second thoughts right up until he went upstairs. Then last night the narrative was changed and Ben made it sound like he was bored with cal and wanted some single fun again wtf? Inconsistent writing there. This post has soothed me and it makes a lot of sense, so glad I saw this because I agree with a lot of your points. I will say though it has tainted how I see them as a couple at the moment to the extent I don’t want back together in the long term. Not a fan of that writer at all
@@sambroughton2912 I’m sort of willing to give the writers the benefit of the doubt here. Darren Little is usually pretty good with ballum so I’m hoping it’s inconsistencies in Ben’s thought processes they’re trying to show more than anything. I wonder if he is just trying to justify to himself that Callum deserves someone better. He clearly hates himself right now. Initially he told Jay they were just messages, just the way gay people talk, then Lewis gets in his ear and persuades him he sought him out for sex. At no point did he suggest sex until he was extremely drunk. We’ll never know his true intention I guess, but it shows the complexities of Ben’s current mental state, which is causing him to act out of character. I stick with my belief that he was deeply unsure about what he was doing throughout that evening, but just wanted to do anything to take him out of his own head. I dunno. I agree they a seem to be trying to dismantle much of what we love about their relationship, but Ben is mentally ill, and I think that explains away at least some of his ooc thoughts and behaviours about Callum. It would be such a waste of great chemistry and potential if EE threw them away.
I agree and disagree with the OP statement. Ben is being honest he a horny young gay man. Yes he is married but he still young in his 20s. It is unrealistic to expect a young gay man in his 20s to be monogamous.Ben is immature Jay and Kathy his biggest supporters both say how nice a guy Callum is for Ben. Ben insecurity is internal. Ben also uses his dead boyfriend Paul to guilt trip Callum. Ben is the problem here not Callum. The writing is so imbalanced that the writers refuse to make Callum more realistic. Callum is still too perfect. I get it the writers want the good boy/ bad boy dynamic. The problem is the good boy Callum until recently been Ben doormat. I think in this scene Ben being really honest we live in a homophobic and heteronormative society. The discussion about an open relationship needed to happen prior to the rape a real discussion. It is obvious Ben wants both like Callum said. Why does Callum always have to support Ben? When has Ben ever supported Callum? Is Callum a husband or a therapist My? My issue is what does Callum want? Ben is a fucking mess and a loser to be honest. Ben is right Callum deserves better but the writers haven't gone there. Callum needs to be sexually attracted to a nice guy without Ben drama and let's see how he reacts?
I do appreciate how Ben is at least trying to open up to someone and explain what’s all going on inside him. He does feels so much shame about everything that happened because like he said he considers himself the “strongman” and so called “strongmen” don’t get raped. He doesn’t even want Callum to see him in that light. Wish Ben would know even the strongest go through moments that make them feel weak but that’s okay.
It remains me of how I lost myself when I was aboued . I found it in my life to deal with it. The people I love helped me everyday and they still are . Everyday I am much happier parson now. I am ready for anything know. For my future.
Yeah, well speaking of being Phil Mitchell’s son. He’s going to have to keep what happened under wraps. Otherwise, the others will think he’s too weak to run the Mitchell business. They’ll smell blood and come in like sharks to feast.
"He deserves someone who loves him, who'll protect him." Oh Ben, that is you! Granted your idea of protection and Callum's need a little bit of negotiation. And yes, you went out intending to cheat on him. But I think the real issue here, the real problem with your life is that you don't think you deserve to be happy. You don't trust it when it happens and you don't think you deserve it. So you self sabotage. And not to beat a dead horse, but we all decide whom and what we deserve. If Callum thinks you're worthy of him then damn it, find those things that he sees in you and make them bloom.
Add there it is! Ben was going to cheat on Callum anyway. That's why he was on the HOOK-UP site. He wanted the old life before Callum...before it was about love, and commitment, and loyalty. He wanted "another body" next to him, not the same old Callum's body. And so, the rape issue with Lewis, doesn't change what Ben has done by having the intent to cheat. Everyone keeps reminding Ben he "loved " Callum. But love is not all that it takes to have a relationship especially a marriage. And I question a person sayin, "... they love someone,.." when they willing, purposely, and with intent, do something to hurt that person, knowing it will destroy the relationship...I DON'T believe that's love. Sadly, Ben just isn’t man enough to be in a loving relationship like the one he led Callum to believe he wanted, and the kind Callum thought he had with Ben. Callum deserves better.
'Callum' doth rather deserve unto be with a Woman. * I am rightly Anti lbtq. 'Callum' were only interesting whence 'Callum' were seemingly fully Heterosexual.
This is one thing I agree on Callum deserves better. Ben has disrespected Callum for a long time. Callum right now is Ben sidekick the character just reacts to what Ben does. Callum is written as a gay best friend for Ben NOT as a husband. Ben certainly doesn't respect Callum ridiculously making comments that Callum isn't gay enough or oppressed enough. I blame the writers for not giving Callum more to do. This break up needs to not be short term.I hope they do not get back together right away. Callum needs to grow as a character be independent from Ben. The problem with the writing is Callum is a plot device right now. Callum needs to date other guys Ben is right he got bored with Callum and wants an open marriage. Ben got the itch after being married for just one year. Even Callum mentioned Ben wants best of both worlds. It is disappointing no discussion about an open relationship. The rape shouldn't ignore the problems they have in the marriage. Ben causes a lot of stress to Callum.
Ben didnt get bored. He didn't know who he was and he wanted in life. He wasn't sure if he wanted to have a life with Callum or have fun like he used to. He thought he wanted to be single and have fun until he saw callum and lexi and realised that he wants that life with his husband and his daughter
Absolutely agree Ben. Calum deserve better. He has been treated like trash, taking him for granted and Ben was going cheat. If Ben doesn't change drastically in their relationships. I again totally agree Ben. I hope you are over. A side from this, my heart is really breaking for Ben and the nightmare he's in now. I'm so happy he told his mother.
Honestly this scene was heart-breaking. How he was completely honest and when he was saying how he doesn't deserve Callum and Callum deserves someone better than him and that it is better if Callum hates him for thinking he slept with someone else rather than know the truth was SO sad. But it's just proving that Ben does love Callum...he wants him to have someone better than him and he would rather it be him that suffers than put Callum through more pain. I do love Ballum when they're at their best and supporting each other especially during the hard times but Ben is dealing with so much trauma and not addressing any of it properly or healthily and it's making him act up because all his life he's been conditioned not to talk openly and to just "man up" or deal with problems with your fists and your temper or not at all, to just bury it instead ...dreadful parenting on Phil's part and so damaging to his mental health. I feel like if Ballum were to get back together, Ben needs proper professional help like therapy or counselling, and/or Callum and Ben might consider an open-marriage? Or perhaps they stay good friends which would be sad to see Ballum end for good but Ben is not in a state to be anyone's boyfriend or husband right now. But knowing Eastenders I doubt they'd go the counselling/therapy route even though that is CLEARLY what Ben needs. And something that should be encouraged for people struggling with their own mental health. I really love Ballum and would love things to work out with them but if they don't and they end up staying friends it has made me ponder the possibility of Johnny Carter making a return...? Perhaps as a new love interest for Callum?
Ben does love Callum. The issues with their marriage are down to Ben's trauma and his opinion of himself. He would do anything for callum. He threatened to kill Phil for him. He refused to get treatment for his deafness until he found Callum in 2020 after the boat crash.
I agree Callum is like a counselor for Ben not a husband. The rape does NOT absolve the fact Ben is a shit husband. It is really sick that Ben felt a connection to Lewis and not his husband. Ben is too immature for marriage and he is younger than Callum. It isn't discussed enough Callum is in his early 30s. Callum wants a stable adult gay relationship and Ben wants to sleep around and be married. Callum is always cleaning up Ben mess now he is a corrupt cop. What happened to Callum integrity? The good news Callum finally stood up to Ben kicked him out. He isn't Ben doormat. But Callum needs to be with a good gay guy. That's my complaint with the writers. Callum needs to be in a relationship with another man without Ben drama.
Wow. Based on this scene alone, it appears Ben will not grow or learn from this experience. He is doomed to remain an arrested adolescent in a grown man's body. His warped concept of protecting Callum shows such incredible disrespect to Callum. Callum is the only one who can decide how he handles learning this information. Ben was so damaged and messed-up before the assault, now it seems he's just going to get worse. It's also astonishing to read online posts and comments about Phil and how he would react. No one knows for sure how Phil will react, but it's not unreasonable to think Phil might not be so supportive of Ben regarding the assault. Phil's warped mantra for Ben has always been about Ben needing to man-up. It's terrible, but that is Phil. Big sigh for Callum.
Ben: Thing is mum, like, I’m sorry but, in bed right, I know what I like, I know what I want but he - Lewis - he took control, and I didn’t want him mum, I didn’t. You know I attacked all them blokes because I didn’t wanna feel like the victim and now look at me. Kathy: You’re not a victim. Ben: Yeah I am, of course I am. I mean the funniest thing is the only reason I connected with Lewis is because I felt like he was the only person who understood me. I never, never not for one minute, even when I was locked up inside and people would give me the look in the food queue, I never never thought that it would happen to me. Coz I’m the hard man, who lashes out first. You know, I’m Phil Mitchell’s son. I’m a bloke who takes control in bed, and men like me, we don’t get raped. Kathy: You’ve got to tell Callum. Ben: No. No! Kathy: He deserves to know! Ben: If he finds out it’ll break him. It’s better if he thinks I’ve cheated. Kathy: No it’s not. Ben: No, I don’t want him knowing, I don’t want him picturing me like that. I was gonna cheat on him anyway, what’s the point? I wanted to feel how I felt before Callum came along, you know, not the same old predictable Callum, but but - I wanted to feel another body. Kathy: He’ll see beyond that. Ben: Nah mum me and Callum, me and Callum are over. He deserves someone who loves him, and who’s gonna protect him. He doesn’t deserve me. Kathy: I know it doesn’t seem like it now but you will get over it. Ben: No mum I’m never gonna get over this. Kathy: You will.
The longer it’s kept from Callum the more heartbreaking it’s going to be when he finds out
Powerful scenes! Max really is a phenomenal actor. Gillians no slouch either.
Now this is Ben Mitchell at his best.
I've got the feeling that when Callum finds out, he could turn to a really dark path.
Exactly what I’m thinking right now, probably might lead to who killed Lewis path maybe I don’t know just guess?
Callum will find out and he'll be there for Ben and support his husband like his mother in law Kathy Beale is doing for her son. Kathy loves Ben more than anything. She knows what it's like being a victim and survivor of rape and sexual assault. And so do I actually. Because I was raped twice by my adoptive father at the young ages of 3 and 4 and years later in 2016 I think. I was raped again and this time a pregnancy was a result of it and my little boy is a huge reminder of how I got pregnant with him. In 1998 or 1999 I think I can't remember the exact year because it was so long time ago. I was sexually abused by my biological father who's now dead. A huge police investigation was taken place and because of what my biological father did. It resulted in the end of his marriage to my stepmother. So yeah I have been where Ben is. And his mother Kathy too. I feel for Ben and how he's handling it. It's not good feeling so awful and horrible and dirty about it and carrying around that guilt feeling that it was your fault when it wasn't your fault. No means no. Ben said no but Lewis still did it to him. That's rape. And I definitely agree with Ben's mother Kathy Beale. Kathy was raped by Willmot-Brown because I remember watching the pain Kathy went through in the aftermath of after it happened. On my part. After the third time it happened to me. I couldn't check myself out. I wouldn't go to the hospital to get checked out nor let the police check me out. I was in too much pain. In so much pain that I wouldn't let anyone not even the hospital nurses or doctors or the police touch me because it hurt so much. And today I still feel that hurt inside whenever I tried having sex with my husband knowing that rape and sexual abuse ruined and destroyed every chance of me ever conceiving a baby ever again. And that my son was my only chance of pregnancy only because of what my son's biological father did to me. I have survived three rapes and one sexual abuse. And I have survived a domestic violence marriage too. My first marriage to my ex husband Peter was violent and abusive and controlling on my ex husband's part.
@@kathleencorson So sorry Kathleen. I'm sending you nothing but love 💙💙
Oh Kathleen, I feel for you, you've been thru hell and these deep traumas especially at such a young age arent straight forward to heal are they.
Thanks for sharing. I wish you all the best.
@@theresabruebaker1030 🥺💔
Kathy is right ben needs to tell Callum but I understand why he doesn't want to
Him saying “I just wanted to feel another body” isn’t saying to me he was bored of Callum. It was more emphasising why he went upstairs to Lewis, and how everything went so wrong afterwards. He wanted to feel like how he did before Callum that night, because that is how he dealt with trauma beforehand. He and Callum fought, he wanted to self-sabotage his marriage and pay for it and hurt Callum in the process.
This is a huge lesson for real, men can be victims too. ☹️
Even the mightiest lion can become the prey.
Yes sadly true
"Callum needs someone who will love him, and protect him..." - that's you, Ben.
I think that saying “I’d never cheat on you” (and seriously, he meant it) and then going out actively looking for sex with someone else a few days later after what was for them a fairly standard row just points to the massive identity crisis Ben has been having since the attack on Callum. They were barely seeing each other, trying to maintain a sex life on an air bed in a flat with a granny and a baby. Ben clearly has ptsd from that attack and probably before that too, and in his mind he didn’t know if he wanted to be a happy, settled gay man with Callum, or go back to the former Ben of no strings fun. Perhaps due to his trauma that life appeared somewhat simpler and more carefree that trying to navigate a new identity. I don’t think he was bored with Callum, I don’t think he wanted someone else, the look on his face before he entered that room with Lewis said that. I think he wanted to know who he was again, and in that moment he saw the photo of Callum he knew exactly who he was and what he wanted. It was just too late. Just my take, but I don’t think he sees Callum as “same old predictable Callum” I think he sees him as the safety and security and love he so desperately wants, but others make him think he doesn’t deserve. I hope they sort things soon. No-one deserves to be happy like this pair, and for all their troubles they are far happier together than apart. I’m rooting for Callum to show Ben that.
I was so mad and upset last night at what Ben said, it felt so occ because the Ben of the night of the attack seemed a lot less for sleeping wit Lewis and more just wanting to drown his sorrows with someone who he believed got him. Ben IMO just looked sad and looked like he was having second thoughts right up until he went upstairs. Then last night the narrative was changed and Ben made it sound like he was bored with cal and wanted some single fun again wtf? Inconsistent writing there. This post has soothed me and it makes a lot of sense, so glad I saw this because I agree with a lot of your points. I will say though it has tainted how I see them as a couple at the moment to the extent I don’t want back together in the long term. Not a fan of that writer at all
@@sambroughton2912 I’m sort of willing to give the writers the benefit of the doubt here. Darren Little is usually pretty good with ballum so I’m hoping it’s inconsistencies in Ben’s thought processes they’re trying to show more than anything. I wonder if he is just trying to justify to himself that Callum deserves someone better. He clearly hates himself right now. Initially he told Jay they were just messages, just the way gay people talk, then Lewis gets in his ear and persuades him he sought him out for sex. At no point did he suggest sex until he was extremely drunk. We’ll never know his true intention I guess, but it shows the complexities of Ben’s current mental state, which is causing him to act out of character. I stick with my belief that he was deeply unsure about what he was doing throughout that evening, but just wanted to do anything to take him out of his own head. I dunno. I agree they a seem to be trying to dismantle much of what we love about their relationship, but Ben is mentally ill, and I think that explains away at least some of his ooc thoughts and behaviours about Callum. It would be such a waste of great chemistry and potential if EE threw them away.
I agree and disagree with the OP statement. Ben is being honest he a horny young gay man. Yes he is married but he still young in his 20s. It is unrealistic to expect a young gay man in his 20s to be monogamous.Ben is immature Jay and Kathy his biggest supporters both say how nice a guy Callum is for Ben. Ben insecurity is internal. Ben also uses his dead boyfriend Paul to guilt trip Callum. Ben is the problem here not Callum. The writing is so imbalanced that the writers refuse to make Callum more realistic. Callum is still too perfect. I get it the writers want the good boy/ bad boy dynamic. The problem is the good boy Callum until recently been Ben doormat. I think in this scene Ben being really honest we live in a homophobic and heteronormative society. The discussion about an open relationship needed to happen prior to the rape a real discussion. It is obvious Ben wants both like Callum said. Why does Callum always have to support Ben? When has Ben ever supported Callum? Is Callum a husband or a therapist My? My issue is what does Callum want? Ben is a fucking mess and a loser to be honest. Ben is right Callum deserves better but the writers haven't gone there. Callum needs to be sexually attracted to a nice guy without Ben drama and let's see how he reacts?
I do appreciate how Ben is at least trying to open up to someone and explain what’s all going on inside him. He does feels so much shame about everything that happened because like he said he considers himself the “strongman” and so called “strongmen” don’t get raped. He doesn’t even want Callum to see him in that light. Wish Ben would know even the strongest go through moments that make them feel weak but that’s okay.
It remains me of how I lost myself when I was aboued .
I found it in my life to deal with it.
The people I love helped me everyday and they still are . Everyday I am much happier parson now.
I am ready for anything know. For my future.
"I was going to cheat on him anyway".... at least Sis is self-aware.
Yeah, well speaking of being Phil Mitchell’s son. He’s going to have to keep what happened under wraps. Otherwise, the others will think he’s too weak to run the Mitchell business. They’ll smell blood and come in like sharks to feast.
"He deserves someone who loves him, who'll protect him." Oh Ben, that is you! Granted your idea of protection and Callum's need a little bit of negotiation. And yes, you went out intending to cheat on him. But I think the real issue here, the real problem with your life is that you don't think you deserve to be happy. You don't trust it when it happens and you don't think you deserve it. So you self sabotage. And not to beat a dead horse, but we all decide whom and what we deserve. If Callum thinks you're worthy of him then damn it, find those things that he sees in you and make them bloom.
Ugh ! * Thou art clearly rather freakish thyself, then.
Add there it is! Ben was going to cheat on Callum anyway. That's why he was on the HOOK-UP site. He wanted the old life before Callum...before it was about love, and commitment, and loyalty. He wanted "another body" next to him, not the same old Callum's body. And so, the rape issue with Lewis, doesn't change what Ben has done by having the intent to cheat. Everyone keeps reminding Ben he "loved " Callum. But love is not all that it takes to have a relationship especially a marriage. And I question a person sayin, "... they love someone,.." when they willing, purposely, and with intent, do something to hurt that person, knowing it will destroy the relationship...I DON'T believe that's love. Sadly, Ben just isn’t man enough to be in a loving relationship like the one he led Callum to believe he wanted, and the kind Callum thought he had with Ben. Callum deserves better.
'Callum' doth rather deserve unto be with a Woman. * I am rightly Anti lbtq. 'Callum' were only interesting whence 'Callum' were seemingly fully Heterosexual.
Heterosexuals art COOL ! *
OMG 😳😳
This is one thing I agree on Callum deserves better. Ben has disrespected Callum for a long time. Callum right now is Ben sidekick the character just reacts to what Ben does. Callum is written as a gay best friend for Ben NOT as a husband. Ben certainly doesn't respect Callum ridiculously making comments that Callum isn't gay enough or oppressed enough. I blame the writers for not giving Callum more to do. This break up needs to not be short term.I hope they do not get back together right away. Callum needs to grow as a character be independent from Ben. The problem with the writing is Callum is a plot device right now. Callum needs to date other guys Ben is right he got bored with Callum and wants an open marriage. Ben got the itch after being married for just one year. Even Callum mentioned Ben wants best of both worlds. It is disappointing no discussion about an open relationship. The rape shouldn't ignore the problems they have in the marriage. Ben causes a lot of stress to Callum.
Ben didnt get bored. He didn't know who he was and he wanted in life. He wasn't sure if he wanted to have a life with Callum or have fun like he used to. He thought he wanted to be single and have fun until he saw callum and lexi and realised that he wants that life with his husband and his daughter
Absolutely agree Ben. Calum deserve better.
He has been treated like trash, taking him for granted and Ben was going cheat. If Ben doesn't change drastically in their relationships. I again totally agree Ben. I hope you are over.
A side from this, my heart is really breaking for Ben and the nightmare he's in now. I'm so happy he told his mother.
That true
Honestly this scene was heart-breaking. How he was completely honest and when he was saying how he doesn't deserve Callum and Callum deserves someone better than him and that it is better if Callum hates him for thinking he slept with someone else rather than know the truth was SO sad. But it's just proving that Ben does love Callum...he wants him to have someone better than him and he would rather it be him that suffers than put Callum through more pain.
I do love Ballum when they're at their best and supporting each other especially during the hard times but Ben is dealing with so much trauma and not addressing any of it properly or healthily and it's making him act up because all his life he's been conditioned not to talk openly and to just "man up" or deal with problems with your fists and your temper or not at all, to just bury it instead ...dreadful parenting on Phil's part and so damaging to his mental health.
I feel like if Ballum were to get back together, Ben needs proper professional help like therapy or counselling, and/or Callum and Ben might consider an open-marriage? Or perhaps they stay good friends which would be sad to see Ballum end for good but Ben is not in a state to be anyone's boyfriend or husband right now.
But knowing Eastenders I doubt they'd go the counselling/therapy route even though that is CLEARLY what Ben needs. And something that should be encouraged for people struggling with their own mental health.
I really love Ballum and would love things to work out with them but if they don't and they end up staying friends it has made me ponder the possibility of Johnny Carter making a return...? Perhaps as a new love interest for Callum?
Ben does love Callum. The issues with their marriage are down to Ben's trauma and his opinion of himself. He would do anything for callum. He threatened to kill Phil for him. He refused to get treatment for his deafness until he found Callum in 2020 after the boat crash.
I agree Callum is like a counselor for Ben not a husband. The rape does NOT absolve the fact Ben is a shit husband. It is really sick that Ben felt a connection to Lewis and not his husband. Ben is too immature for marriage and he is younger than Callum. It isn't discussed enough Callum is in his early 30s. Callum wants a stable adult gay relationship and Ben wants to sleep around and be married. Callum is always cleaning up Ben mess now he is a corrupt cop. What happened to Callum integrity? The good news Callum finally stood up to Ben kicked him out. He isn't Ben doormat. But Callum needs to be with a good gay guy. That's my complaint with the writers. Callum needs to be in a relationship with another man without Ben drama.
Wow. Based on this scene alone, it appears Ben will not grow or learn from this experience. He is doomed to remain an arrested adolescent in a grown man's body. His warped concept of protecting Callum shows such incredible disrespect to Callum. Callum is the only one who can decide how he handles learning this information. Ben was so damaged and messed-up before the assault, now it seems he's just going to get worse. It's also astonishing to read online posts and comments about Phil and how he would react. No one knows for sure how Phil will react, but it's not unreasonable to think Phil might not be so supportive of Ben regarding the assault. Phil's warped mantra for Ben has always been about Ben needing to man-up. It's terrible, but that is Phil. Big sigh for Callum.
Obviously you don't get it it's not easy to tell someone you love you weere violated in that way
okay sorry, but did ben just come out as a top?
Power bottom?
@@Leeloula1457 100% lol.
@@Leeloula1457 it can like that too lol
He’s always been a power bottom
Caption English
Ben: Thing is mum, like, I’m sorry but, in bed right, I know what I like, I know what I want but he - Lewis - he took control, and I didn’t want him mum, I didn’t. You know I attacked all them blokes because I didn’t wanna feel like the victim and now look at me.
Kathy: You’re not a victim.
Ben: Yeah I am, of course I am. I mean the funniest thing is the only reason I connected with Lewis is because I felt like he was the only person who understood me. I never, never not for one minute, even when I was locked up inside and people would give me the look in the food queue, I never never thought that it would happen to me. Coz I’m the hard man, who lashes out first. You know, I’m Phil Mitchell’s son. I’m a bloke who takes control in bed, and men like me, we don’t get raped.
Kathy: You’ve got to tell Callum.
Ben: No. No!
Kathy: He deserves to know!
Ben: If he finds out it’ll break him. It’s better if he thinks I’ve cheated.
Kathy: No it’s not.
Ben: No, I don’t want him knowing, I don’t want him picturing me like that. I was gonna cheat on him anyway, what’s the point? I wanted to feel how I felt before Callum came along, you know, not the same old predictable Callum, but but - I wanted to feel another body.
Kathy: He’ll see beyond that.
Ben: Nah mum me and Callum, me and Callum are over. He deserves someone who loves him, and who’s gonna protect him. He doesn’t deserve me.
Kathy: I know it doesn’t seem like it now but you will get over it.
Ben: No mum I’m never gonna get over this.
Kathy: You will.