The Untold Story of the Cult at Sarah Lawrence College - Pt 1 with Daniel Levin | Season 2; Ep 20
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- Опубліковано 26 лип 2023
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Larry Ray was recently sentenced to 60 years for heinous crimes he committed while running a sadistic cult that began in his daughter’s dorm at the prestigious Sarah Lawrence College. Now, Daniel Levin, who survived years of torture, manipulation, sexual abuse and testified against Ray is revealing new details about what he endured.
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Guest Bio:
Daniel Barban Levin holds an MFA in poetry from UC-Irvine. Nylon called his memoir SLONIM WOODS 9 (Crown) about surviving the abusive cult which began at Sarah Lawrence “a disturbing, extremely vulnerable and extraordinary account of what happened to Levin and the emotional and psychological fallout.” He executive produced the documentary STOLEN YOUTH (Hulu) which the New Yorker described as “…a remarkable work, advancing the prestige true-crime genre’s slow but steady reorientation toward centering victims.” He lives and writes in Los Angeles and teaches continuing education students how to translate difficult memories into powerful stories through Stanford University.
Guest Information:
Website - danielbarbanlevin.com/about-2/
Instagram - @danielbarbanlevin
Twitter - @DanBarbanLevin
This podcast should not be used as a substitute for medical or mental health advice. Individuals are advised to seek independent medical advice, counseling, and/or therapy from a healthcare professional with respect to any medical condition, mental health issue, or health inquiry, including matters discussed on this podcast.
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Narcissists are everywhere and these days it seems like everyone has at least one in their lives! Dr. Ramani Durvasula, a licensed clinical psychologist, will help you spot red flags and heal from the narcissist in your life. Every Thursday, we will hear first-hand accounts from people who know this territory the best, the survivors.
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Considering the cost of tuition at $82,000, I think the school holds some level of responsibility for not protecting them from this predator…
Yes, the fact that the university makes that much and they didn’t have a designated staff to check a on them.
When I watched this on HULU, i couldn’t stop thinking about it for days. My heart was so broken for those kids. Can you Imagine going to college, and coming in contact with someone like Larry Ray? And I’m sorry, his daughter needs to be sitting in jail right next to him. Con Artist and Abusers should have to register like sex offenders.
I agree!
Agreed!! My ex con artist husband should need to register! He’s in Texas now married to a woman after moving there for a Job and conning her. The money, mistresses, lies, abuse, ect! List goes on
We had a guy at our dormitory who tried something a little like this using a front of Dungeon's and Dragons but secretly administering date rape drugs to the participants. He was basically an element making people quit school. Fortunately, I was left with an ability to lace into him and his pals verbally and they avoid me like a plague.
YES!! THATS A GREAT IDEA! Love it..
I agree
This man is brilliant. He is incredible. I'm overwhelmed by his clarity, courage and strength
Lawrence Ray?
I'm amazed at this young man's ability to express things that are so difficult to comprehend let alone express in words. He has given me some words to express events that I've experienced with a manipulative ex-partner.
This is just such a riveting interview!! I am in awe of the use of SUCH accurate and precise terminology and language to describe the complicated intricate layers of this horrific manipulation and abuse. I so appreciate Daniel's honesty and courage and Dr. Ramani's empathy, support, and explanations.
Yes..amazing 💥🔥❤️finally perfect words to describe the so far undescribed💯🔥
The way these people operate is beyond comprehension and completely demonic. The level of coercion and deception is one of the hardest parts to cope with (for years afterwards) and process. People who have never dealt with an individual like this think they'd have done things differently, or like you said, that there's something wrong with the victim. But they don't understand the depth of what this kind of coercion can look like. Thank you so much, Dr. Ramani, for the work you do and the clarity you have about this stuff. Thank you Larry for having the courage to talk about this nightmare.
True. There’s overt coercion and then there is this covert, sneaky, cancer type of conversion. I like to think of people like Larry as deadly Cobras mesmerizing you with their
mojo. You’re basically in a trance like state and have almost, if not totally, lost your sense of self, and then the snake strikes. And you’ll never fully recover from the venom for the rest of your life, if you survive at all.
I went through a long phase where therapists were telling me I had to have been sexually abused as a child, but I still don't think so. I don't remember anything, and I do not believe there was any sexual abuse. Yet there are whole years of my ADULT life where I cannot remember the places I lived, where I went to college, my wedding, etc, all revolving around another person in my life. So I do know memories can be repressed. The ones I DO remember are horrible enough, thank you. I really appreciate Daniel's courage and belief in himself and I made notes all through this podcast to go back on my own and figure out what they mean for me. Thank you too, Dr. Ramani.
@@maruiacancer6 My heart goes out to you. Since only a 2 year old can get Ovarian Cancer before a lot of children can talk at the same sohpistication as an adult can while only a child is going through that when their brain is growing so fast at the same time well of course their long term memory of the experience would be affected when having to be given pain medication too.
I’ve read about False Memory Syndrome these things probably never happened just a seed planted in the mind I went through something similar to this I know now it never happened
I graduated from Sarah Lawrence College in 1998. I am so mortified by this whole story and about what these poor kids went through. I keep wondering how the administration could have let something like this happen?
My son graduated too from SLC he loved it 🤩
I did as well, in 1990, and I remember Slonim 9 well. I lived in Slonim 1 and had several friends over in 9. It's surreal to picture such horror living in a place one is familiar with.
The administration wasn't involved and it certainly was not the administration's fault. The student invited her dad to live with them and the students agreed to it.
@@mrs.m840 I lived in Sloanam Woods, where the students in this situation lived. Having someone living with you in that housing who is not a student would be easy. However, it was not allowed. The administration is considered in loco parentis, in other words, the guardians of the student's well-being. Protecting them from things like rape, theft, etc... These students paid SLC a great deal of money and damned well needed and deserved the administration's protection.
@@sueulintzmosovich1232😮😮😮😮😊😮😊 16:24
What an amazing person to interview. He is so poetic, articulate and authentic. Much love!
Thank you for drawing attention to the shaming into isolation, so much of this happens subtly, but solidly, to many of us of us in narcissistic families or relationships of all kinds.
And the shifting scapegoating and terror of these kinda of dynamics, and the difficulty of not only getting out, but advocating cannot be understated. Thank you so much!
The secrecy is the worst for children & pretending in public just adds salt to our wounds so silence becomes the enemy
@@caroleminke6116 exactly.
People who engage in shaming others need to hear that they are "too desperate and needy".
Bravo Daniel, thank you for having the courage to speak out about this event in your life… you have helped so many people. Please never forget that you have survived & seem to be thriving… thank you for not giving up 🤓
I admire his ambition to get the book and documentary done. I have been struggling for a long time to write my own book about how this happens in families and marriages, but it is very difficult to do yet I am determined to get through it because it is a story that needs to be shared. I wasn't to go through this nightmare and learn these lessons only to have it all stay inside of me. I have never heard a story like mine shared, yet I find myself nodding in acknowledgment no matter how different the circumstances to other people's stories are. Based on reactions I have received over time, I know that a lot of people would relate to my story in part or whole.
Write your book! Your story does need to be told & shared. I have a real life story that I must write to be in some peace. Not sure I would ever actually experience peace, but that is another aspect to be dealt with. I am on the second attempt writing my book. Good luck with your endeavor. It both worries & saddens me that SO many extremely important personal stories need to be told. Many people can use hearing them because of experiencing things that are being held inside. I believe our stories can help people feel less alone.
Write it! My daughter and grandchildren are in a situation very similar to this. The psychopath is her husband and it is very painful. As difficult as these stories are to hear like this it helps families like mine bc we feel so lost.
Write it! The only way to disarm these people is knowledge. Educate the new generations.
I’d love to hear from his ex girlfriend who “was against Larry.” She sounds pretty strong in her convictions.
I was raised by a mother just like Larry Ray and I escaped her home at age thirty. This episode is extremely helpful for someone like me. Making sense of the insanity is still something I have to do and I'm so grateful you are breaking this kind of abuse down and helping us make sense of it, feel validated, keep the hope alive.
Bless you. I’m so sorry terrible things happened to you.
Dr. Ramani ; when speaking about the wine when you didn't taste the flavors of chocolate, oak ect.. I liken it to a few things in life. The Emporers New Clothes a childhood story actually helped me to have my own opinions. It is sad we jump on the bandwagon ( I have been on the bandwagon as well)
Phenomenal episode again. I think the work of previous guests applies here too for those of past with similar backgrounds, ie:coercive control and betrayal blindness, protective disassociation (including suppressed memories) and the experts in cults.
Really appreciate the emphasis on indoctrination and erosion of perception.
Very important conversation. Thank you to all concerned for being so brave to talk. This guy was so smart to think his way out under such power of this entity he encountered. 💪 I can relate to his experience about suspecting the FBI Agent to be in cahoots with the perpetrator. I myself now suspect most ppl around me that approach me for conversation to be previously involved with the entity I encountered. 😶
Daniel is so insightful and courageous in this interview. I felt so protective of him. I can not imagine enduring such manipulation and humiliation yet still being able to give a thorough and vulnerable interview.
This guy has an amazing and interesting perspective
I'm certainly very sorry this young man endured such horror. I am glad he is on his healing journey. However, for as much as he did share I feel there's so much more that he left out. I would love to hear the other victims' experiences also to really put the pieces together. Thanks again Dr. Ramani!
There is a lot of information available from the other victims. Probably the easiest source is the Hulu documentary.
A brilliant podcast with two highly intelligent, articulate, sensitive, and evolved individuals discussing the horrors of narcisstic abuse from personal experience. Thank you Dr. Ramani and Daniel Levin for presenting this. Being a survivor of abuse from narcissistic parents, I am extremely grateful to you.
I think that demon was more of a sociopath...like a Narcissist on steroids....
I think he is a genius. Thank you Dr Ramani for bringing him on the show
Those poor students. What a nightmare.
Thank you both so much for this. So helpful! I relate to so much of this and appreciate your emphasis on the keeping this complexity of it all as far too often simplifying it minimizes is dismisses the difficulty of the experience and especially the healing process.
Thank you very much for the courage to share these videos and your interviews. Also a big 'thank you' to Dr. Ramani for bringing awareness to this case and the fact that coercion claims need to be looked into more deeply in a court of law, before it comes to such cases
Love 💗 the questions Dr R ask
Thank you very much for sharing this
Thank you for sharing your story Daniel. You've put into words so much in a way that I haven't been able to articulate. Blessing on you.
Thank you Daniel. Some of what happened to you reminded me of a former manipulative Boss I had who played the pesudo Therapist.
I’m so sorry for what happened to you 😢, however listening to you gives so much hope and courage for survivors , thank you for sharing your story and your documentary 🙏🏽Strength and healing to you and all who have been harmed by Larry.
I was watching the documentary and kept thinking about Dr. Ramani. I'm so happy to discover you did these interviews!!!!
This is too difficult to listen to having had a daughter go away to college in 2008. 😢
I am terribly sorry about the things that happened to you & others. While I have been abused it was not to your extent. Your recovery and truth telling is wonderful & brave. Your point about watching True Crime is very important. I watch some shows for learning to be aware & compassionate…but can hit pause…& pray for people & healing. God Bless you & your cont. healing!
Dr. Ramani is a brilliant Teacher.
ending the self blame. end the self blame.
at around 33.27 Daniel's fear and struggle with Larry's long reach , while far away in England, makes total sense. It makes painfully real to many of us who could be subjected to family -like pathology but wasn't able to work it out .. because it looks and feels like being ungrateful and harsh. In Larry's case whatever he did for Daniel or any of his friends was an investment to bind him/her to himself to break him down later .
i'm so sorry this happened to you god bless you
I read his book. It was so good and went way more into detail so you could really see the progression in how all this insanity went down. Daniel is a pretty awesome person.
What was the name of the book, I would like to read it.
I am a female survivor of sex crime, I am a survivor of same sex statutory rape. Same sex sadistic rape. Are you a sadist? You are very harsh towards the female gender who never received any aftercare and beyond harsh, you are not in tune with your empathy.
You are the type of person that nobody who experienced a same sex sadistic rape wants to hear from, ever. Asking me under the comment where I said what happened to me, "what the hell is wrong with you?" is designed to humiliate and invalidate. What do you get from Ramani to come into the UA-cam comments and attempt to play to the darkness of those on the bottom rung?
If I was a dark person I would tell you to come here right now with your earrings out.
The young lady in the same story, Felicia, who was targeted, was protected in the comments section where her story was told.
In Ramani's comments section it's as if everybody is in a haze of cult like worship for Ramani.
Slonim Woods 9
Thank you for this informative and socially helpful video. Daniel is brave and inspires courage for other survivors. Wishing him all the very best for the future. Thank you Dr Ramani for this kind and thoughtful interview.
You are always welcome
Daniel is one of the most attractive men I've seen in a while, physically, intellectually and emotionally!
Dr Ramani ❤️
1:01:22 Those were questions I had.. the time lost and maybe no memory recorded is a testimony to disassociation, etc.
Yeah I also think dissociation is the reason for the memory loss.
When Jake Pizur told his story on Soft White Underbelly, he was accused by hundreds if not thousands of lying. He passed away. Look man, i know going through what you went through causes an immense disturbance in your life. Please survive and thrive.
Get to the place where you feel stable and are healing from the CPTSD if you can.
His story was so sad. Especially how he was not believed. He did seem to have been coming into a better place in that interview. Very sad there was not more support for him at that time.
Hat tip young man. You are amazing.Keep on believing in yourself.
Was Talia in the room - when he was torturing Daniel and in other times Felicia and her siblings and Claudia? If so, then she is an equal monster psychopath. Most of us would shield our friends from harm if we are present.
Talia seems to have received a large amount of protection throughout all this, which is interesting.
I read about this!!!
Min 47:50 I am so glad he has validation.. many people think recording, keep a record, journal is "keeping account of injury, being a victim, not wanting to heal, retraumize yourself" the abuser, others and even your mind will make you doubt. Even many therapists don't understand this. I am so sorry you went through this. TY for this interview 🙏 I probably won't be able to watch it but have my own gaslighting recordings. May you be validated. This guy's abuser relived his power, took trophies, and had blackmail, leverage, and apparently paranoia. 51:59
Thank you for sharing this. I couldn’t finish the SL college documentary- too horrifying but I want to hear their story👍🏼
You are always welcome
"Therapy is it's own journey".
Very very intelligent man.
i just watched the series (sort of diving deeper and elaborating here) and what really struck me was how the cult was mostly abt pure and raw control over others? i guess that's where the narcissist v. actual psycho line is drawn. at the same time that's a direct result of how the series portrayed the story, not focusing on the perpetrator's narrative but on his actions and the pain he caused.
Yep! Cults are real people!
believing oneself.
Thank you for speaking about this. I wanted to hear analysis from an expert in this field.
I've just watched the series in Hulu, my heart is broken for those students 💔.
Evening TV had an NDE story that brings her back to love
I also felt profound love recently coming theough my own body
But the nightmare of narcissist was the trauma that was preventing the love from coming thru fully
Just yesterday I sat down to a 90 year old man in the library. He joked about taking a younger wife, after our interaction which was him asking me if the librarians are new and him telling me about what he was reading about after I asked.
He was a lil nice gentleman who was getting a little attention.
That is my life. Putting the attention onto others.
I could have asked him to help me with a meal. I can't bring myself to.
I hope he handles all the trouble that was caused for him really well
10:47 so true, 12:07 so important to prevent it, keep it complicated because it was, 45:20 victims couldn't 'hit the pause bottom', so true and very well explained afterwards,
1:24:12 again, true how about every group members experience is different, yet there's a shared basic harsh truth that connects them
First time hearing of this I think?? Actually may have heard of it years ago.
I just found out today that only a 2 year old could get Ovarian Cancer. How a 2 year old would process the trauma of being hospitalized would be far different than how a grown woman would process that kind of experience. There are so many reasons why one person copes with exploitation in a different way to survive than someone else would.
"Pickpocketing your soul" (wow)
Really nice guy, I'm in the uk and it's a shame you couldn't have stayed here longer and away from him. Seems a sensitive chap not afraid to be open and honest, definitely makes him a very appealing personality. What an awful experience to have to go through. I hope he has a great life, he is a man. Larry is a worm!
10:51 Maybe he and I have the same therapist because my therapist said almost the exact same thing to me!!!
be wary of people. trust in yourself.
A lot of what he said took me back to what happened to me when I was being abused by my offender especially the sexual assault because it was coercive control but used in sex acts and I was afraid if I didn't do what he wanted that I would lose him because he threatened to leave me so many times. The irony of it is that I left him and I ended the relationship and after I did that he stalked me for almost 6 months. I ended up leaving a job that I'd been in for almost 28 years minus the covid shut down and I've changed a lot of things in my life like my schedule my routine my phone number and soon I will be moving to a new residence. These people tear up your life and now I'm left with questions of why?
be very wary of these people. trust in god. trust your intuition. trust your instincts.
Which god? That usually is the first step to a cult. Be careful with that first step. 😅
I am so glad that some of the kids who were hurt so badly were able to unpack the abuse and move forward with their lives. So many people abused by these psychotic monsters never really recover. Daniel is such a strong young man. After watching the documentary and reading about the case I was so worried about all these young people. I wish the survivors all the best and hope this monster dies in jail and cannot hurt anyone else.
❤
Larry Ray is more of a monster than most people we see. When ever we see a story of someone bullying someone, we always say, "oh if this happened to me, I'd do this and that". But Larry Ray's level of manipulation, psychological torture and sleep deprivation over such a long time, even being your best friend at the beginning... None of us can really say with certainty, we also wouldn't have been destroyed by him.
I mean, being able to convince people they did stuff that never happened.
The one thing the documentary showed was that it was possible to completely break some ones mind. Oh, we've heard about it, but to actually see it happen. It was shocking. And this one man, broke everyone he was living with at the same time. A complete monster.
When he was sentenced to 60 years, I had two thoughts:
1. This is TRULY more than most other cases, to benefit society. He's too dangerous to be allowed to walk free. The way he weaponises his intelligence...
2. The other inmates will now be his victims. Especially the new young and scared inmates.
60 yrs in prison is no small ask for the new york state system . . . deplorable.
So true.
He's like 50 anyway so he'll be dead by then
🕊️
I never wrote a book. Or have my kids or I been part of a cult, or any claim to fame. My story is not BIG or was ever acknowledged. It was REAL, and honestly words don't have residence in explaining the depths of despair we went through. We suffered from Malignant narcissistic abuse without ANY friend or Family support emotionally. We did spend 15 years basically destitute and hiding out in Mexico because literally ANY situation was better than what was happening or what could of happen. I literally was on my own with two kids, abused by him, and his flying monkeys (the church and family and friends). It took me 4 years to finally flee (not personal belongings, just clothes and my kids) and that only happened because of my own fear of harm, the harm of my kids, and sheer survival. I'm still an angry person, I'm sad for children and my former self, and just wish who I am today could be there to comfort us all. I still would rejoice if this person passed. I prayed for his death so we could come home. I'm not ashamed of that. My kids never deserved anything he brought up on us. I think that will always be what hurts my recovery.
They divide and conquer.
WOW AND WOW! I learned sooo much! Could see the sexual assault by first husband, and coaxing making me feel guilty. Terrorized and all of it. This information validated me. I have a therapist who tells me that the sexual assault was not true because my thoughts come from being sexually assaulted by my father and mother since I had a toddler, like false memories from my end. Maybe you have made a video about false vs true memories so I will search this. Uff the feeling complicit. Thanks to him and you Dr. Ramani. 😢😢😢😢 Facing torture through racism in the city of Lawrence, Massachusetts in 1980s I faced the “sameness”. The rape was the phycological and emotional and sadistic intentionally driven focused by these specific people to drive the Latine people out of the city. Dehumanizing us was sooooo real that even the churches were complicit. We had riots in the city because of it. And the department of justice from Washington had to come in. I have been dabbling into writing for three years my memoir but it shake’s me so much that I stop.
1:03:40😮
So. My question is why did Raven see through Larry's bs from the get go when the others didn't? And btw why did Daniel think breaking up a long term relationship via text would be appropriate behaviour instead? Different levels of education and intelligence I guess?
Why would all of a sudden family and friends block you/isolate you? Doesn’t seem normal to me. Maybe they’re hiding something?
blackmail. coercion. coercive control do not get sucked in people. delusional grandosity . so conniving. so calculating. be smart. be wary. coercing.
oh heckkk no💀 i got a offer for volleyball from this school looool
🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️🥰
We MUST talk about it, about church abuse by narcissist "pastors"/monsters who are abusing authority playing by God´s card. Thank you for speak out!!
don't praise them. don't freeze and don't fawn over them. don't get sucked in.
I've been watching 15 minutes and I have no idea of what actually happened 🙃
00:33 listen to the 3 sentences at that marker (if you want to know what happened otherwise maybe the PollyAnna content would be more up your alley)
Same
Yeah. They took into account that many people would know the story from the news.
Watching this and getting an add which sounds like a cult-leader recruting. 😰😤
How does the algorithm function? 😉 Weird😂
So glad they survived and got out of it. I hope they find back into their lifes!
Love and greetings from Austria!💜💜💜💜💜
Je crois que la majorité des gens ignorent qu'ils doivent protéger leurs être
psychique et que pour y parvenir il faut être présent dans son corps,ne pas laisser son attention être dérobée ou accaparée par n'importe quoi.
robert frost the poet.
They say that most pedos dig their own graves by keeping photos or videos of their victims and their crimes. But it's not just them. Other kinds of sex offenders, like this guy, do to it too.
If Lewis Howes, Tim Farris, Joe Polish, could lend voice, and all those who experienced sex crimes, could come together, and teamwork, we can make something happen so that people dont need to starve.
the real question.. who was paying rent.
1:16:54 please psychology think long and hard about any ideas and any possible solutions to putting the control back to us the people who endured sex crimes. Maybe you experienced too. I dont see whats wrong with offering to help a non profit, do you?
Eww this is disturbing
Theres gotta be an opening, a way through to not need to deal with the nonsense of elders when your wish is sincere to continue to heal from the wounds of CPTSD
pickpocketing your soul. damn.
Daniel should have reported it straightaway.
I have been listening for 30 minutes. So many words. So little said.
There was no way to predict this outcome, but I’m sorry, if my roommate in college said her dad needed to live with us in our student housing, THAT’S A HARD NO. Huge red flag. People need to recognize red flags and I’m surprised Dr. Ramani isn’t bringing that up. I know you don’t want to victim blame, but there needs to be a way to educate people about recognizing the warning signs in life of things that just aren’t right. There is no praise for Raven who saw this guy for who he was and resisted his charm. It seems all the others did have vulnerabilities with their mental health. Daniel though is the one who mentions recognizing the vulnerabilities and the situations where abuse is occurring. The lack of highlighting these vulnerabilities is the same thing I see in the cult videos on this channel.
Massive pressure to go along with psychology. If you aren't in the world you wouldn't see the effect of psychology on the bottom rung, especially the female gender. Female gender younger gen now needs to accept that the men around her are going to label her an N.
If you are a leader and somebody comes docile gentle, passionate, and would like to discuss some weaknesses and how to solve, that is a positive.
Rare that anybody in this world has drive and desire to even approach elders now.
he was mafia, he was a mafioso, many in the tri state area idolize mafioso, he seems to have learned from mafia movies. Wicked on earth. When mafia is emulated.
How did you vet the FBI agent to know for sure she is not against you?
I do wish a new catch phrase would replace “Toxic Masculinity”. Maybe go back to Bridezilla again?
Wellllll... psychopaths know who they can victimize and who they can't. I'm thinking a person like Ray wouldn't have gotten very far at MIT, as opposed to a college that specializes in liberal arts and attracts the, shall we say, less "critical thinking" type of student. Maybe it's a left-brain, right-brain thing. Maybe math, logic, and skepticism are more interesting to MIT students than socializing or peer pressure could ever be. But definitely Ray is the one at fault. No question. What a dilemma. Sports, performance, media, religion - people participating in these fields seem to be fodder for emotional manipulation leading to sexual abuse. Seems to me there has to be a physical brain reason for that.
You say that, but at other points in his life Larry Ray conned the FBI, Military, Political, and Business Minds as well as members of the Mafia. Not "just" these liberal arts students.
Students in STEM feilds, can and DO become victims of coercive control, abuse and manipulative predators.
How can people who are allegedly so smart, high IQ and "elite" be duped by a psycho cult leader? What would have happened if this guy tried to start his cult at some community college in the hood?
Human nature is human nature no matter how “high IQ” or smart we feel we are. We all still have emotions, and emotional needs.
The same thing happens in the hood, and happens to high IQ/Low IQ people just the same.
There are lots of high IQ people who join cults. Not to mention “stan culture”, and the worshipping of celebrities. (See Nicki Minaj, and how she engages with her fanbase, and how they treat people in response to her encouragement. Pure narcissism.)
Also, this happens “in the hood” all the time. 😏 I am a black American woman from “the hood”. Why do young black men idolize gangsters, criminals, and “shooters” in gangs?
What do you think the “Crips” and “Bloods” are? 🤨 A CULT. Gang Culture is a cult.
What do you think about Black Southern Baptist churches where your grandmother is giving her last $20 to tithe, but she can barely put food on the table. Meanwhile, the church’s pastor drives a bentley in the fall,and a corvette in the summer? A CULT.
What do you think PIMPING is? Mental and emotional manipulation. A CULT. Look at the “Queen Opp and Chelle” situation going on right now. (UA-cam it. 😔)
All Going on in “the hood” with black people right now.🤷🏾♀️
This is why we have to get very clear about how this happens, the signs & what it looks like, and that this can happen to anyone who doesn’t understand that we all can become susceptible to exploitation by people and corrupt organizations.
The main qualities people have who get trapped in these situations is...
- Idealism
- Unhealthy Boundaries
- Naïveté- Simply not knowing this exist and could happen is a perfect trap
- Blind Optimism
And I will add my personal experience, because i know lots of SMART confident women “from the hood” who got trapped in abusive and controlling relationships with manipulative men. Women who are quick to stand up for themselves at work, in a grocery store or with friends, but are being abused by broke aimless men.
Aside from the fact that their fathers, brothers or uncles were similar to their abuser, so abuse was all they knew. What I also noticed those women had in common is that they all had trouble admitting when they were wrong. About ANYTHING.
Admitting you were wrong about something is the first step in course correction. But Those women seen “changing direction” as a failure, weakness, disloyalty or giving up. When they should have seen “changing directions” as apart of the process of getting to their best self, and best quality of life.
Those women also struggled with letting go of their idealized life, and accepting that it would never be. For example, they didn’t want to have. Multiple baby daddy’s, be divorced, or have their kids grow up without the father in the house. Even tho he was beating them and doing more damage living there. 😒 They believed they could help the man change, and that if she could make him see he was wrong he would have an epiphany and change. blind optimism and Idealism. they were Borderline arrogant with their belief in their ability to fix someone.
But That’s not how human beings work. That’s not how life works. When someone shows you who they are, you should stamp “AS IS” on their forehead, and hold no hope they will ever be different. Leave them where they are,if they are not what you want. Especially if they are harming you.
When it comes to organizations, Being apart of something should never cost you your autonomy. there should always be basic civility and respectful communication. Bare Minimum.
anyone or anything that demands for you to agree with them 100% of the time is either pimping you, or you’re in a cult.
Last but not least...
ANYONE/ANYTHING SHOULD BE ABLE TO LOSE YOUR SUPPORT!
Yes , I never thought of the bloods and crips in that way before. And yes black folks are not exempt from cults.
@@brittneysperspective8433
Thank you for your thoughtful comment. I very much appreciate your input on this.
@@kkcook3743 Mafia / Cosa Nostra is structured as a cult with rituals, "rules" etc. also.