Are Sailing Youtubers Just Drunk? Ep 253 - Lady K Sailing
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- Опубліковано 15 лис 2023
- This week we talk about alcohol on boats and how never meeting your heroes might be sage advice when it coems to sailing youtubers. We look at drinking and boating, alcoholism and boating, bahamas rum drinking and sailing, bikini grils in the bahamas, and drunken adventures
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This is not just for boaters --- It`s about Everyday life, Thank you Tim
So true, when my dad retired he thoughts about having more time to drink. So he made a rule which is no alcohol before 4 pm. I'm not retired and I apply his rule. An uncle told me long ago, you will ibe mposed by many things, the only one it's not is choose your friends.
Fair wind
@@pierrelapointe8511 I am a recovering alcoholic who only drank after work. Still had plenty of time to black out 3 out of 7 days a week and suffer the many consequences. We alcoholics use all kinds of excuses to condone our drinking...I don't drink whiskey anymore because, I only drink with on the weekends, I only drink beer, I only edulge while on the hook, after dinner, a sundowner, a birthday etc etc etc. Sailing just happens to be an activity that lends itself to alcoholics because we love isolation. God willing, next season for me will be the first season sailing sober!
Yes I have a few close friends who have told me the same thing - they just want to get smashed when they drink. Kudos to you for sharing such a personal and important story!
Being this vulnerable and honest on UA-cam isn't easy - and I applaud you for doing it, and your choice to be a sober sailor. Nicely done!
Sober 8+ years. Thank you Tim for your honesty and openness.
sober 15 seconds
Dude, thank you for a fantastic episode. As a non drinker who gets invited to so many peoples boats, it’s somewhere between awkward and uncomfortable.
I just enjoy boats and sailing, not drinking and yet for so many people it’s clear that it’s so deeply intertwined they couldn’t do one without the other.
Glad to hear you're out there. My wife and I don't drink and don't really look forward to those situations :(
Excellent honest episode. I’m A one and done kinda guy if at all. I can comfortably hang with the best of them without the booze, but it definitely is part of the culture. Keep up the great work!
Thanks, Tim. Well said. I’m sober 10 yrs and sailed many yrs in active alcoholism. Everything is better sober. Everything. Ive also found that there are a lot of sailors that don’t drink. When I drank, I found sailors that drank like me. Now that I’m sober, I’ve made many sailing friends that drink little or not at all. I’ve found it to be a non issue. If you’re happy being sober, you’ll be happy sailing sober. - Jim W
Non-drinkers are becoming more common in my circle. My boat has cold options for everybody’s taste :-). As long as I can offer you something to celebrate how bloody lucky we are to have such a sunset, it’s all good.
Congratulations on stopping the drinking and recognizing that it leads to severe problems .. Hats off to you
You hit the nail on the head there, it is not as easy for everyone to hear about drinking problems because there is a party in every bottle
Just hit my year mark. The world is pretty great
Happy Anniversary 🎂 it's a good beginning 👍🙏
Getting sober was one of the most difficult things I have ever done. When I first tried to quit I was shocked at how difficult it was and how much it was impacting me. I learned a lot about myself during those first few weeks of sobriety. And I didn’t like everything I learned.
I just hit 13 months sober. I am never going back to the way I used to “live”.
Congrats on your sobriety. Life is better this way.
Congrats. Prepare for the tests that will come. Hard times will lure you back. Prepare to tell "it" to go screw and do whatever you need to to let that temptation pass. It will make you enormously stronger after.
Hats off, and applause to you Tim. I conquered it once...I thought; nearly 3 years sober flushed away by a week in the Caribbean and a weak spirit. Went from 0 to "not enough" at a frightening pace. Time to take it on again. Best wishes my friend, hope you snag that dream vessel soon, and that I'll be able to catch up with you for a club soda & lime when you do.
Coming from a family where this is a very real generational problem, I applaud you openly and honestly talking about this. An interesting card to file away for when I finally get to meet you and hopefully chat over a cold sweet tea
I make an awesome fresh Cranberry Lemon Raspberry Sparkling Water!
Hey Tim, thank you so much for sharing this ‘sober’ advice. It is good to know the “warts and all” side of this lifestyle. Alcoholism took my sailor Grandfather so this is close to home. Good on ya Tim ✊
have been enjoying your vids now for a couple months, admired your measured decision making process as applied to various matters. I've got 20 yrs now and suspected you had time as well...maybe practicing principles showed in your approach. Anyway, I admired how you conducted your vids and despite many yrs solo sailing enjoyed taking the seat and listening . Thanks Tim and hope that boat you are dreaming on slips up to you at the right moment! fair sailing!
Great message! I have been sober a good amount of time now, and I am looking forward to cruising sober, at this point, I wouldn't want it any other way. When I first got interested in boating, some 30 years ago, it was during my active alcoholism. It definitely was a good pastime for someone who liked to drink like I did. Your message is exactly on target, and I deeply thank you for it. And I do enjoy boating and everything else, more sober. And you are right; there is a lot of help out there. People like us who care and have experience with recovery, guys, we are here for you. I hope to run into you "out there" someday if just to tell you "thanks" for teaching me a ton about what to look for and what to avoid when searching for my perfect cruiser. Safe travels all!
Oh man can I relate. I have been sober for 35 yrs. My wife left me over my drinking and our life long dream as well as our marriage was gone………….but my wife and cruising came back. I joined AA two weeks later and went to meetings every day for a yr putting our cruising plans on hold. We ended up cruising the Atlantic, Caribbean and Pacific. Sober. And we had incredible camaraderie of fellow sailors that didn’t need alcohol to enjoy the cruising life, or did so very sensibly. At first I was actually scared that I wouldn’t like sailing sober. Alcohol was so engrained in the cruising life. But in short order it was better than ever. And yes, some sailing UA-camrs are way too much into alcohol. It will catch up to them.
What’s wrong with this picture: finally reached my dream. Now sitting in the Bahamas on my boat with my wife. IN PARADISE. How could it be better. But wait!! If am in paradise living the dream……..but why am I chemically numbing myself??? Why do I need a chemical, a drug, (yes if you are addicted to alcohol, you are a drug attic) to alter my state of PARADISE??
Think of that the next time you have or see a “boat party” cranking on in someone cockpit or beach. Why?……….Sorry does not compute.
We were still in the yard when we observed that behavior can go dangerously sideways under the influence. We saw lots of people drinking too much and not moving forward on their projects. We were heading in a bad direction, too, and made extra effort to get out of the yard to get away from those triggers to drink. And I very rarely drank before joining the sailing community. Like, maybe twice a year.
A couple months after splash down, we ran away to another community. Alcohol is still everywhere, and people really push it, but we understand very clearly that alcohol is not helpful to our goals. We want to be active, healthy, and to move forward. We remind ourselves every day of our objectives and are actively abstaining. Thank you for talking about this problem so openly. It's real, and it's insidious.
I live far away in Poland , I don't have a boat of my own and I will probably never go sailing in the Caribbeans but when I first came across Lady K UA-cam channel I immediately fell in love with it. Now I know better why. This guy is such a nice and sensitive dude and deep at the same time that it really speaks to my heart. Plus it is like reading Jack London's stories - the magic of far away lands. Good work Lady K, good work!
I hope you do sail the Caribbean. You can make it happen
Drinking and boating is not limited to just sailing. I've witnessed really crazy, dangerous stuff on lakes, some ending in injury and fatality. All alcohol related.
I’d like to congratulate you on your sobriety, and thank you for talking about this! One of the best trends I’ve seen in recent years in general is the increasing support for those who choose sobriety. I’ve lost several friends to alcoholism, addiction, and substance abuse, so it’s heartening for me to see people remind others that sobriety is a good thing, and that you don’t always have to drink to be able to enjoy life and be social. Thanks again for spreading the word, and congratulations on your own sobriety!!
Congratulations on staying sober . It takes guts to admit that we have a problem and it takes a strong person to do something about it. I support you 💯 and respect you for taking care of yourself.
Very Sage commentary, excellent post! For health reasons I am limited to living the cruising Life vicariously on UA-cam and I have noticed that alcohol seems to flow rather freely on many of the channels! Congratulations on getting sober and staying that way! Stay strong, stay sober, stay alive!
Sober before sailing, started crewing at a yacht club, lots of good sailors weren’t so good when wasted on alcohol. I still love sailing one day at a time! Thanks for sharing!
Great video. I am actually going into my 4th month alcofree on board, and so far, its actually going quite well. Having been a heavy drinker for the last 30 years, which followed me on board as a full time cruiser for the past 10 years, i wasn't sure i could cope amongst my drinking friends, but its been easier than i thought. I quit mostly because it was time to look after myself, but i love the clear head, increased energy, deep sleeps and a more healthier complexion. So there you go, Sail On Sailor!
Tim,
While I don’t have this problem , I really appreciated this video. We all have some issue we need work on and being able to recognize it is important.
Thanks again.
Tim, thanks for another good video. Coming up on 73, I understand. My son of 44 lost everything to the drink. He is now 19 month sober and doing well. About 6 months ago, I joined a sailing club and have been taking him there every 6 weeks or so ( hes still in rehab) . I have found sailing is a great therapy for lots of things. We sail on a Catalina and enjoy life without being buzzed. And I survived the 70's. Jeff
Congratulations on your honesty. What a great bit of advice. So generous and courageous of you to put this up as something that will hopefully help those who are willing and in need of such advice.
My wife and I have been cruising full-time on our sailboat for over 20 years. Neither of us has a drug or alcohol problem, but we've met plenty who do. It's obvious your message is "from the heart" and we appreciate your candor. Thank you.
I watch a lot of sailing channels I notice a lot of sailors are heavy drinkers, It makes me feel grateful that I'm not caught in that trap anymore. 38 years sober, I broke the family mold...
Congratulations on your sobriety and the ability to recognize your situation, then doing something about it. I recently had a chance to sail with a youtuber I follow and it was a great experience. The youtuber was great, he and the rest of the group on his boat were young and hip people, but they went out of their way to make this old guy feel included and were very understanding when i didnt do shots with them. Yes it got a little crazy at times, but they never got out of control and held their alcohol with class. I know, I know I was very fortunate as not all experiences are like this. Thank you so much for the great videos on sailing and yes keep the heavy side down!
Indianapolis sounds a lot like Queensland Australia, I've a Beneteau oceanis and l too have seen the light, feel brighter and life is more fulfilling. Great episode Tim. ❤
Great advice Tim! Sober for 23 years here. I "quit " drinking many times before actually quitting-I had to admit that I had a "can't drink just one" problem, and that did the trick. And having a wonderful life partner helped as well. Cudos to you! Love your vids 🙂
Well Sir., thank you for that, and it wasn’t too “preachy”! I am a sailor and have had dreams of going it alone out there and finding a cruising crowd, and now that I am sober I have been very aware of what a lot of the people doing the same thing are doing. Hearing your tale this week was enlightening. Thank you.
Very thought provoking. Possibly your best and most important video.
Thanks for the reality check on tropical sailing life, and the candid story of your experience with alcohol and sailing. Congrats on catching it before it went too far. I think it's all about what works for you whether it's zero, or enjoying in moderation. I'm one of the lucky ones who can can have one drink, or occasionally a few, and stop. It's definitely a problem when people let it take over the majority of their days, and life at anchor is such a beautiful experience to enjoy sober.
I'm an old Marine Engineer and blue water seaman who used to have an O'Day Day Sailor. I thought I'd like a sailboat to cruise the warm waters so I started watching You Tube videos much as you did (your's included). I had given up drinking and what I got to of the videos was that there was more drinking than I thought I could endure without a backslide. So, bought a new bass boat instead of a used sailboat. I'll keep watching your videos to see how you make out. Thanks for all your efforts.
Don't give up on your dreams because of alcohol, you will find that giving up alcohol was the hardest part, staying off will only get easier, and after a while, drunk people will help you stay sober, just because you can see precisely what you don't want to be doing, but if you enjoy your life, then keep going, sailing is great, but not the only great thing you could spend your life doing
Excellent advice! Doesnt it feel great to have all of your time and memories back!
Thanks for sharing your story Tim. I can’t remember ever hearing a message anywhere close to this on any Sailing channel - so good on you! I look forward to meeting you some day out on the water!
Great message Tim, Thank you
Thanks Tim for sharing your story. All the best and can't wait for your next adventure!
Good video, Tim. As a child of alcoholics I love people who get sober. A friend took me an AA meeting and asked me afterward if it was 'okay.' I said it was like the best Christmas I ever had (it wasn't December). It was like all those troubled people in my family and everywhere growing up got sober and were turning their lives around. I personally just never liked it; my choice was easy.
The good sailors I've known are cautious and responsible. I've never seen any sailor drink before weighing anchor, entering a narrow channel, or sailing at night. I've been on boats with a 'one beer in the evening rule' and a six pack never gets finished in a month.
I was a drunk cruiser. Nothing bad ever happened but it was expensive. People asked how much we spent on fuel in a year and our reply was that we spent more on booze. And we were a power vessel. Sober now and it is better. I miss the ice cold beer, I really do. But I get so much more done, I can get up early, no need to worry about where the nearest liquor store is. and on and on. After three years sober this years trip was really fun. I was worried drinking and, boating had become to intertwined but I still love it and I'm better at it and my life is better all the way around. Good video, we thank you.
Awesome video. This is a very deceptive problem, that can take you by surprise. Sober for more than 30 years, I was prevented from becoming a "raging alcoholic" by a good dose of reality regarding my family history, and have never regretted "missing out on all the fun."
Thanks for the insight, being your self in a world of storytellers is a truth in itself.
Good episode Tim, thank-you for your openness and honesty - good advice to many of us.
Over 30 years since I had a drink. Very much relate to your story. Thanks for sharing it. Please keep the great videos coming! 😊
Amen! When I stopped drinking life got a lot more interesting.
Great advice and good work taking back control.
Perhaps your most meaningful video ever. This one took A LOT of courage. Bravo...
What a great episode. Thanks for the straight talk.
Definitely respect your honesty! I definitely fall into similar categories
You hit the nail right on the head. I don't think I have ever heard it explained as well as this.
Spot on with the analysis...good video.
A wonderful episode. Thanks for the honesty! Brilliant.
Excellent advice. Thank you.
Congratulations on your recovery so far. I've known a lot of alcoholics whose lives would have been so much better if they could have quit. You're a great guy. We don't want to lose you to alcohol. Please take care of yourself and reach out to someone if you need help. Thanks for having the courage to share this.
Your best episode yet (and I have seen every one). I wish you every success on your enviable journey!
GREAT vid. (And brave too!). This IS sage advice. I'm very close to selling the business and have been training up towards cruising. I have always wondered "what way" I'd go when cruising. So then, your words are good for me particularly. Thank you.
This is by far the most informative sailing video I’ve seen.
This is awesome thanks Tim
A very baby 1 month sober, was great watching this.
Amen, brother. Thank you so much for sharing such a personal journey. Your channel has always shown the realities of the cruising life, but this is the first time I've seen anyone address this darker side of the lifestyle.
I'm an example of both sides of the cruising life your friend talked about. I wasn't quite to the level of "raging alcoholic", but I was getting there. I'm lucky that the desire to drink all the time has worn off and I have newfound energy and motivation to get out and go cruising again.
I just left Key West after 9 years of living aboard in one spot. Key West is a harbor with a drinking culture second to none - makes Annapolis look like a monastery. No one will judge you if you drink all day, every day, and drink to excess every day. Sad to say that I've seen four friends literally drink themselves to death.
Thank you for not being a "boats, butts, boobs and beers" channel. :-)
Fair winds!
Capt. Blackheart Charlie
s/v Aurora, OBX
Thanks for sharing your experience .
Wow. Thank you for the sage advice.Enjoy your journey safely!🇨🇦
Love your story. Thanks for sharing
Thanks for posting this, very insightful. For me it is also a reminder that boating (or sailing) can be boring; a lot of channels focus on the excitement and novelty of sailing, and not many mention that a lot of the time you are just sitting on the boat at the dock or at anchor. As I prepare for my semi-retirement in the Caribbean, I'll try to make sure that I keep busy, do a bit of work unrelated to sailing, in such a way that I will enjoy that glass of rum comes Friday night.
Thank you for addressing the topic. I appreciate your sincerity and transparency. I've noticed lately a few UA-camrs mention giving up alcohol. Some temporarily some long term. I applaud them for it. I worry about the ones who seem too attached to the booze.
Sage advice all around that can be applied beyond drinking. Thanks for sharing.
Fantastic message!
As a future cruiser, I probably needed to hear this.
I wasn’t a big drinker until I joined the military at 27 years of age. After that, well, I’m a “heavy drinker” when I don’t have work to go to. Now days, I work on (big) ships as a deck officer though, and sail 4-6 months at a time, with no alcohol on board. Going cold turkey when working has never been an issue. But I can imagine the insidious slip into alcoholism if I’m cruising full-time for a few years.
I’ll keep this video in mind. Thanks, Tim!
Well said Tim, not solely a sailing issue. Failr play to you for getting a handle on this and stay sober. Respect and keep it up.
People who drink get uncomfortable with people who do not, and it gets hard to not drink around them. What worked for me? I went more than half a year where I didn't touch a drop, mostly because I was in the start of a midlife crisis where I sorta obsessed on reversing course on bad habits - food and exercise being big things to change.
After uncomfortably turning down yet another drink on yet another day, one of the ladies happened to say, "Hey dude, you're getting jacked!" (sloshing her words, of course). A lightbulb went off so I ran with it: I just let the drinkers think I had a different addiction: exercise. I took on the manor of the "fitness nut". From then on, they intercepted drink offers from others to me with..."Oh, he doesn't drink because he's one of those crazy fitness guys who won't even look at carbs!" Win, win.
This reminds me that I've been neglecting my "exercise addition" lately. An old body won't hold together without work. Gotta get back at it. Sometimes I wish I really did have a fitness addiction.
Great episode! @Tim FYI You are a one of the nice guys to meet.
Congratulations on finding the life without drinking often it is more entertaining at least is a different way. Can't wait to hear about your next sailing adventure.
So greatful to know you Tim.
thank you for talking about this Tim!
Thanks Tim your comments are truly Timely I decided this morning that I need to abstain from the 1st one as that‘s the only 1 I have have control over!
By the way I Love both your channels.
Epic eye-opening episode, thanks! Watched it 3 times already
Excellent and thought provoking video. Thank you.
nice one...so true
ditch the alcohol and be your real self
save your money and health
Thank you for this episode!
Great episode Tim. Thank you so much for putting this out there.
From someone who is close
I don’t think I’ve ever commented on one of your videos, but I want to thank you for this one. I don’t think I’ve ever had “a problem with alcohol,” but as I’ve gotten older it seems to have a problem with me. I’ve worried that I won’t fit into the cruising circle because of my inability to drink. So I find it encouraging, as you say, “Those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind.”
Thanks Tim. This needed to be pointed out.
I think it is very telling that when Tim is referring to early big sailing channels he fails to mention the biggest. My guess is the guy in question is a certain mustachioed Aussie. Description would seem to fit after watching that guy for many years, imo.
Which channel are you thinking? I’m so curious
@alanmcn17 Riley from Sailing La Vagabonde is probably the Aussie he is talking about, and he really seems like he would fit the description.
Thats who I was thinking of
Thank you Tim. I am proud to know you.
Thanks for sharing! Been there with hard to do just one. Sober now for 30+ years, lifestyle now. Really appreciate your honnesty and wisdom shared in this and all your vlogs. Look forward to seeing what you do next, keep up the Great work!
Interesting Tim. Great self reflection. I remember watching your trip thinking 'headaches in the morning' might have become counterproductive. Retirement can be the same way. I'm fortunate that I have the ability to do 'one'. And I certainly don't have the urge. But being able to treat Tuesday just like it's Saturday requires some discipline, something not as tough when the office is there the following morning. Keep up the great content.
Great episode, thank you for keeping it real.
I once had a captain, (crab fishing Alaska) tell me, "on the boat your vises are the only things that are truly yours".
Nicely said!
Really good honest presentation, this will help so,e folks, well done !
Thanks, again love your work.
Some very wise words there, thank you for sharing.
Great sharing. Sobriety also brings a greater awareness of surrounding beauty when you sail. Thank you for sharing your own experiences. Fair weather Sailor
Luv the honesty in this video. I’ve found lately a lot of people are giving up the drink or at least becoming sober curious . For me, I’m a beer drinker and at the end of the day a cold one is my signal to relax, the work is done. But then my wife and I started drinking non-alcoholic beer and I found that it wasn’t really the alcohol that I needed, it was just the taste of a cold one at the end of the day - and that was enough. I very rarely have alcoholic beer now but when I do, boy I can really taste it, and I don’t like it anymore.
Thanks for sharing Tim.
Thank you for sharing your story and the heads up. I struggle with the same demons.
Bad monkey!
Sage advice.👍🏼👍🏼 As a fleet/club racer I understand having food & drinks afterward with fellow racers comiserating over wind shifts, starts etc. but I never understood racers who would drink during the race especially an overnight/muli-day race. It’s not a performance enhancing drug. Luckily I was not regularly crew on those boats.
I have been on UA-cam for several years and have never seen/heard anyone (sailors) talk about this sad trend. I can tell you the O'Kelly's Channel have let us know they are non-drinkers and how they substitute with non-alcohol beverages. Pretty cool stuff. Thank you for bringing this topic up and congratulations on your personal success!🎉 Happy Sailing ⛵
Great video Sir . Happy new year.
that was wherry courageously to admit being an alcoholic, most adults in my family are, but will newer admit to it, even though a few of them have been drinking them self 6 feet under.
good on you Tim it is a nasty beast to wrestle.
that was the best advice I've heard on UA-cam so far.........Thank You