Rest of story in comments YT wouldn’t let me post all at once. Update 4: I think my sister's boyfriend (M44) is infatuated with my son (M13). Hi all, this is my fourth update. It's a bit weird to be sharing the personal details of my life to thousands of people online, but I feel like I owe it to you all and it helps me keep track of everything, so I don't mind. Not to mention how helpful your advice has been, as I've never encountered a situation like this and I was terrified that I’d make the wrong move and mess everything up. So thank you all so much for being so kind and helpful. There’s a lot I have to talk about; I did go to the police, and an arrest will most likely be made in the near future. Before I get into that, I think I will start with the escalation in David’s behavior and his whereabouts, and then circle back to what happened with the police. Hopefully, the timeline still makes sense. TLDR at the bottom. In my last update, I left off with David’s disappearance after I found out what he did with my son’s clothing and confiscated it. It turns out that David was not on the run, nor missing, nor crashing on a friend’s couch. He holed up at his parents’ house, and is still currently there. My sister informed me that due to my accusations of him grooming my son, David had a “mental health crisis”, she “hopes I’m happy with myself”, and she feels the need to stay with him for support. So, in other words, he’s hiding at his parents’ house because either the guilt is getting to him, or he’s scared. Or both. His entire family is infuriated with me. Whatever story he’s feeding them is making me look insane in their eyes. Not once did they ask me for my side of the story. After I went to the police, my sister made the decision to kick me out of her home. I saw it coming a mile away, so I’m not too upset by it; I just wish she didn’t feel such fierce loyalty to him and his family. I don’t even know how to explain to my kid that his aunt doesn’t support him. She does know I was approved for housing, and that I have no other place for our belongings at the moment, so she at least has the decency to let us keep our stuff there until we can fully move out. I guess that counts for something. Not much else to say about that; I’ve just been trying to keep my distance. David’s behavior, though, got so much worse during this “mental health crisis”. The harassment escalated to stalking, under the guise of “wanting to clear the air”. He: Showed up to Roman’s baseball game that was held at a different school to try and speak with him. That means he found his schedule, the exact time he was playing, and the address of that school. Found the motel we’d been staying at (we had to move to a different one after this incident). Created three other Instagram profiles to message him about how this is all a misunderstanding, how much he misses him, etc.
Some of these messages were awful. Things like “Don’t let other people make decisions for you”, and “You’re old enough to decide who should be in your life and who shouldn’t”. Paragraphs and paragraphs of him pouring his heart out to my son, and begging him not to tell me that he’s been reaching out. This harassment has left my son completely disillusioned. After screenshotting everything, I asked him not to read the messages anymore and to just delete them. At that point, I wanted to take his phone away but I knew he’d resent me for that. Maybe I made the wrong decision, maybe I didn’t. I don’t know. The day David found our motel was one of the most traumatic moments of my life. I don’t know how he found us. My sister knows I’ve been staying at a motel, but I never told her which one. On that day, it was about 9pm, and I needed to go to the corner store to grab something. My son was taking a shower and getting ready for bed, as he had school the next day. The corner store was a minute’s walk away. The room we were staying in was visible from the windows of the store. I’d made this quick trip countless times. In the moment, I didn’t feel unsafe leaving my kid behind, but hindsight is always 20/20. I already feel stupid, no need to tell me. David had parked at the lot across the street, and I didn’t see his car. He waited until I was almost at the store and my back was fully turned to go for our motel room door. It was obviously locked, so he started knocking, but by then I had already heard him and was running in his direction. I nearly blacked out from the fear and adrenaline, and it’s hard to remember much. I recall that he didn’t seem angry; he just had this miserable, panicked look in his eyes. He really did look like someone who was going through a mental health crisis. I told him I was calling the police and that he needed to leave. He said that he was “entitled to a conversation” with me, but he ran off once he saw me dialing 911. To me, his reasoning is bullshit. He keeps saying that he wants a “conversation” and to “clear the air” with me, but if that were true, then why didn’t he approach me? He knew I wasn’t in the room. Why did he essentially try to break in, where he knew my son was alone? I of course documented this incident with the police, which I will get into right now.
On Monday, March 27, the day after my last update and days before the aforementioned events occurred, I went to the police for the first time. The police officer I spoke with sat me down and gave me the opportunity to talk about everything - how David was very close with Roman, what I caught him doing with his clothes, the messages, etc. Thank God for these posts, because I found myself referring back to them. Memory can be unreliable. I presented the evidence that I had as well; I showed the video footage and gave her the article of clothing I confiscated, as well as the text messages and Instagram and TikTok messages. She then told me she would contact the district attorney, which she did soon after. I was shocked by how fast the process was moving, and she told me that since it involves the potential sexual abuse of a minor, they don’t want to waste any time. I was interviewed again by a detective, and a couple days later, they called David in for an interview. By then, the stalking had begun. During my second interview, I showed him the new messages David sent, and told him about how David showed up to the school and the motel. I don’t know what they asked David during his interview, but I can imagine that he denied everything and spun up a web of lies to try and make me look crazy. I’m not really concerned about him, though. With all of the evidence I have, David should be very, very nervous. A detective interviewed my son as well. This is what worried me the most, and I insisted that if they didn’t have to do it, I’d rather they didn’t question him at all. But they said it would help build a stronger case, and I trust them. I was told I had to be there during his interview, since he is a minor. Roman only knows about the stalking and harassment, but he has no idea about what David did with his clothes, and I want to keep it that way for as long as I can. I personally asked the detective not to bring it up. I’d just like to shield him from it all.
They asked my son about the messages and the stalking, as well as their relationship. When asked about any physical contact they had, Roman brought something up that he didn’t initially tell me about. He said there was one instance when he and David were in the living room watching a show called Stranger Things. David randomly placed his hand on my son’s chest, left it there for a moment, then said, “I’m glad you’re alive.” I…don’t really know what to make of that, but combined with everything else he’s done, it’s very disturbing. I asked my son about it afterward, and he said that he didn’t tell me because it didn’t make him feel uncomfortable. As an isolated event, I guess it could seem like an innocent act to a thirteen year old, so I understand why he didn’t bring it up, but I don’t know. All I can do is take his word for it. In terms of the case, they are now requesting a warrant of arrest with the clerk of the court. If this is granted, then David will be arrested and charged with Lewd and Lascivious Behavior, Harassment, and Stalking. He could end up getting up to five years in prison, maybe even more since a minor is involved. So that’s where I’m at right now, waiting for the clerk’s decision. The waiting game is stressful, but I’m trying to focus on the positives as much as I can. It’s nice to see how fast the police and detectives are working and how serious they are taking my case. All I can do is trust that the outcome will be in my favor. After the interviews, all of David’s harassment stopped. Good thing, too; stalking and harassment of a minor is a felony, and I’m sure knowing that the police are onto him scared him. I’m not naive enough to feel safe, though. I filed a petition for a protective order after the motel incident. I’ve been feeling paranoid (not a good feeling for someone who’s bipolar) and having a lot of anxiety lately. Always looking over my shoulder, flinching when I see a stranger who looks like him, etc. “I’m entitled to a conversation with you,” he said when he tried to break into my motel room, but I don’t believe him. I think David believes he’s entitled to unrestrained access to my child due to their prior relationship. The entitlement is what scares me the most, that someone can just…take something because they feel like it belongs to them. I'm scared to go anywhere with my kid. Anytime he goes to school, I fear that it will be the last time I see him.
It hasn’t sunk in yet that my situation has developed into this. It’s been difficult for me to wrap my head around where David’s sudden attachment stemmed from. I was under the impression that predators are in general weird around children, but he never acted this way around other children, only mine. When he started dating my sister, she told me that David didn’t want kids, and she was trying to convince him to change his mind. That’s why she was so happy to see him and my son “bond”. Someone previously commented that in David’s mind, he might believe that there’s a legitimate romantic connection between him and my son. I don’t know if there’s any validity to that, and the idea of looking into it makes me nauseous. I’d rather not speculate and just pray that he gets arrested soon. The biggest drawback is that all of this has significantly disturbed our quality of life. I know that my kid is putting on a brave face, but he’s not doing well. It’s getting to him, and I knew it would, but actually seeing this siphon his happiness away is gut-wrenching. He’s still doing fine at school, still eagerly partaking in sports and spending time with his friends, but every once in a while, he’ll do the thousand yard stare, his eyes bereft of any sort of awareness (dissociation, maybe?). He used to eat a ton but he hasn’t been finishing his food lately. He constantly says he doesn’t feel well. I can’t afford therapy right now but I spoke with his school counselor, and they want to start weekly meetings with him to check in (which my son was not thrilled about, as he does not want to bring any of this up at school). He is very open with me about his feelings and we do talk about everything that’s been going on, but there’s only so much I can do. He needs a professional.
I’m not doing well either. I am exhausted. I’ve never felt so overwhelmed in my entire life. My mental health is on a rapid decline. I’m not eating or sleeping normally. I can barely get through a shift at work without breaking down. Even my intrusive thoughts have been alarming and distressing. You don’t think you’re capable of these things until you’re in this situation. There really is no going back once you find out something like that. I don’t have a lot of people to talk to about this. I think I need help. Hopefully my next update is more positive. Thank you for listening. TLDR; David’s harassment escalated to stalking. I contacted the police and gave them the evidence I had. Interviews with David, my son, and me were conducted. The police are currently requesting a warrant of arrest. If he is arrested, he is looking at 5 to 10 years in prison.
Found an update on Reddit. Op isn’t being kicked out however the sister has implied she doesn’t want them there. Sister also told predators family and now they hate op and are trying to make excuses for him. Op finally went to police and found out that it was rather quick with how fast they’re moving she showed the recent texts, videos and physical probable evidence. Police then brought predator and ops son in for questioning. Predator made excuses then claims he feels “entitled” to unrestricted access of the son due to prior relationship. Ops son said there was a physical encounter that maybe considered inappropriate where when predator and son were watching a show, predator laid his hand on sons chest for a minute and said “I’m glad that you’re alive”. Police and da think they have enough to charge him now. No more updates after that.
Now that is scary and very disturbing The fact he was only crying because you didn't give him access versus calling him or suspecting he was a predator is a major red flag
Big props to the mother for being a warrior and a trailblazer, so much people out of fear would do nothing. It was difficult for her speccially for the stress, one would have thought that this kind of situation once cut would be alright but then david trying to reach her son was indicative that while she have done the correct thing this was a much bigger issue. Any mothrr that does this is a hero for herself and others. I only want that her nightmare ends soon.
This is sooo messed up. As a mom, I just cannot imagine the blind rage that I would feel toward sister’s bf. And Jesus… the frustration at the sister for not even listening, just becoming instantly super defensive! That’s how predators prey… their crimes are overlooked and covered up just like in this scenario. Kudos to OP for being an alert mom who listened to her gut. I hope she and her son are continuing to do well and heal.
Her sister is either delusional or just desperate to not be alone. Whatever the case it’s sad and pathetic she can’t see she’s just part of the facade predators like him cultivate around themselves to avoid detection.
Well if op ever reads this, you’re not crazy, you’re not reaching out. David is a creep and he is obsessed with your kid. I’ve been myself in a situation like that with a step-uncle too. Unfortunately when my parents “discovered” (actually I broke the news to them years later, my mother believed me but didn’t do nothing, my stepfather didn’t) it was too late. He already sa’d me, the only « good » side of the story is that at least he didn’t rape me? But he displayed all the signs your in-law is showing, getting into knowing me and getting “attached” pretty quickly, trying to creat a kind of a “intimate relationship” with me by being digitally inappropriate, whispering things into my ears, proposing to spend some time alone just the two off us, wanting to gift me pricy things in exchange of sometimes random things etc.. Being overly obsessed with me to the point where if we attended a family gathering he would look out for me everywhere and wouldn’t stop until he finds me and wouldn’t let me go afterwards. Since I’ve always been craving for a paternal relationship that unfortunately I didn’t have with my bio father or stepfather I was completely dazzled by it until he started touching me inappropriately. So please, take good care of your kid, pay real attention to him please. You already did a good job, keep going.
That's disgusting tom stealing his gf nephews clothes does the nasty with them then sleeps with them in his pillow my god this man needs to be put behind bars, it's also obvious that he turned off his location app because he knows op knows what he's done and that's why he's hiding cause it's only a matter of time before op reports him and the police will look for him and arrest him. Also op's sister is an idiot if she's planning to adopt a kid then she needs to understand when becoming a parent their child's saftey becomes their number 1 priority and considering how she's handling the situation with her nephew being in danger of her grooming, pedo predetor of a bf she's off to a bad start, hopefully when she's sees the evidense she'll realise her mistakes and apologise to op and nephew for refusing to belive them.
There was one more update after the one in the video. David found their hotel, was stalking Roman to another baseball game that took place at a different school, made more Instagram accounts to message him, and OP finally went to the police. There was a warrant out for his arrest. OP deleted her account after that update.
And her sister didn’t believe her, to much evidence not to. Sister should run and thank op for showing her what he’s really like. I hope op and Roman are doing ok and that that damn sicko gets caught soon and sent away for a long time.
He was arrested and charged with cp, and some other charges the sister was at the trial and saw evidence and came to op to apologise but op put some distance from her sister for the time being and the ex had connects in prison so the ex bf gets r*ped everyday in the prison
And this is how kids get SA'd by family members and family friends. My god. All the red flags! I would've been out of there with my son at the sign of the first red flag. Some people are so clueless!
as someone who was groomed by a family friend I can tell you its never that easy to see. Theyre manipulative as hell and every red flag is supposed to make you seem like youre crazy since it could very easily be seen as "innocent" or "familial love". its fucking disgusting, absolutely horrid creatures. In hindsight its obvious, but usually the red flags are spaced out enough to where they make you think youre going insane for even considering it. crazy shit.
To be fair to the OP, she didn't have anywhere to go. But yeah, she should not have had to ask if the adult texting her kid all the time like a kid with a crush was overstepping boundaries.
Firstly that woman is an amazing mother to have been so busy but involved enough in her son's life to know when something was off. A lot of people would still turn a blind eye to it because you can't bite the hand that feeds you but she wasn't afraid at all.
I told my dad because I said audibly “ that is creepy” to him standing over your son with the door closed, and he agreed with you it is creepy and you should get your son out of there before something really bad happens. Edit to add: you said church retreat and everything made so much more sense.
If your in america, staying in someones house is not the same as having a home, if you you tell section 8/hud this they will put you higher on the list for housing because you are homeless. If you left because of domestic violence male/female and the home is to far away they will put you higher on the list, if you have childeren under the age of 17 this will put you higher on the list, if you have a disability this will put you higher on the list, if you are a veteran this will put you higher on the list. Sorry just putting this out there for everyone who needs it. Now if you talk to them about whats going on right now they will move you to the top, but i see you got there op i hope everything works out for you and your son stay safe.
My friend has ADHD! It’s sadly much harder for him in school, and he is currently struggling with some kind of depression. I wish that I could help him, because I really do care about him. He has drawn multiple drawings of figures hanging themselves sadly. He even cried at lunch once…I respect and care about him so much, I just wish he would talk to me. Yes, I may annoy him all the time- but that’s just how best friends go. He is really my only boy best friend. My other one, well, we drifted apart after 6th grade ended. Being in the 7th grade now, I feel so bad for him…he doesn’t get the recognition that he deserves and I wish I could make him see that I truly do care about him. I just want him to be happy. I want him to know that I’m there for him. But I can’t tell him face to face. I always hold back everything I want to say. The only way I express my appreciation for others is through writing. I think the best thing I can do to him is write him a lengthy letter to show him how much I care. You see, many of his old friends moved schools and he started hanging out with me and my girl bestfriends because his other friends were being racist. I feel so proud of him for sticking up and distancing himself from those kinds of people. Because his life is already hard enough. I don’t want him to go through anymore pain. I wish I could help everyone in my age group thrive, I hope I could help anyone, any age thrive. A lot of people just think that people my age are dumb. That people my age are the same. That we just gossip all day and call it day. No. We don’t do that. Those are just stereotypes. Stereotypes have formed so many horrible things. So many racist comments. So many ugly words. Stereotypes should have never been a thing. The truth is, we don’t all think the same. I happen to be an open minded person. Last year, after a quarrel between my Mother and her roommate, I wrote him a letter showing how great I knew and thought he was. How his presence in my life, brightened my soul. How he was like the Father Figure that I didn’t really get to experience. He acts like a Father, I see him as one. What surprised me most, however, was that he cried. Not tears of anger, but beautiful, jubilant tears. They fluttered down his wrinkled face like graceful butterflies. I made a grown man cry, just by writing a single letter, at the age of 12… I know I’m still young, and I may not know a lot, but I believe I can do it. I may not be amazing at math, but I have other strengths. Just as in books, a well-thought out character has multiple flaws. Multiple weaknesses; multiple struggles. Know that you are not made to be perfect. Perfect DOESN’T exist. It’s a thing that people WANT to exist. You are you. Don’t let anyone think otherwise. You are beautiful. You are worth it. You matter. Please my friends, spread kindness to this world. Lastly please remember that you are valid. That you have a purpose in this world, you just haven’t discovered it yet. Before every rainbow, there is a thunderstorm. You are loved, Even if you don’t think so. ❤
As once a victim of mild (yes. MILD, so you can skip this comment because everyone who got sa'd suffers worse) grooming, the way david bring the op's son gifts might imply as a "reward" For doing the stuffs at him Just like how i experienced, when i was at 7th or 8th, i was (and still am) an idiot. So this one ash-whole (you know what im reffering to) told me that he could help me on my HW, in exchange of me sending him, you know what. That's the method of groomers. Rewarding you for doing sus stuffs
I can't believe OP left it so long to do something! If I had found an unrelated adult standing over my son as he slept, that person would never be around my child again.
I think she may come off like that because they have been through a hard time with her abusive ex. She knows she's over protective to the point of seeing crazy. So she thinks she maybe over reacting but at the same time she's feeling that gut instinct of something is just not right. The dude is definitely a predator for sure
In some comments, yes, OP did go to the police, shared all evidence, and only mentioned that police and DA has enough case evidence against him. That's all I've seen. Hope this helps!
You must've missed the several updates. She applied for public housing and was approved. They're moving in a few weeks. Her sister let them keep the majority of their things in her house until she can fully move out.
Why? 93% of convicted child sexual predators describe themselves as "religious" or "very religious". Several of them even explicitly said they targeted victims within the church because religious people are gullible. It's basically a red flag.
@OKAYOKAY420 I get it. But some part of me wants to believe that a father would want to protect his son from this kind of predator. It's wishful thinking on my part I'm sure.
@@a_noelles Unfortunately abusers usually do not want to protect their victims. They either will want to abuse their victims again or will allow for them to be abused by someone else knowingly. I've never seen any different. Abusive parents and partners are especially the worst in these sorts of situations.
If it’s her and her son maybe she should sleep in the room with him. Also. Have a convo with David , the sister and your son to not be texting and calling maybe even change his number
1 Corinthians 15:1-4 Authorized (King James) Version 15 Moreover, brethren, I declare unto you the gospel which I preached unto you, which also ye have received, and wherein ye stand; 2 by which also ye are saved, if ye keep in memory what I preached unto you, unless ye have believed in vain. 3 For I delivered unto you first of all that which I also received, how that Christ died for our sins according to the scriptures; 4 and that he was buried, and that he rose again the third day according to the scriptures:
"I love him more than I love myself" That's great and all but it's a little weird that she feels the need to say it, almost as if that's an explanation for how much she loves him. Loving your children more than yourself is such a truistic statement that it feels suspicious to mention without some type of insinuation or other reason to say it.
👀 did his mother say that? I didn’t catch it but I feel like its valid for how distressed op seemed the entire post though. :3 sometimes when people are nervous that’s how writing comes out. That’s how I think personally though anyways.
I can't say I fully agree or disagree with your statement but I feel obligated to like your comment just because you introduced me to a very interesting word that I had no idea existed...for a second I thought you meant "altruistic" so I had to google it, thanks for unintentionally making my vocabulary stronger :)
Rest of story in comments YT wouldn’t let me post all at once.
Update 4: I think my sister's boyfriend (M44) is infatuated with my son (M13).
Hi all, this is my fourth update. It's a bit weird to be sharing the personal details of my life to thousands of people online, but I feel like I owe it to you all and it helps me keep track of everything, so I don't mind. Not to mention how helpful your advice has been, as I've never encountered a situation like this and I was terrified that I’d make the wrong move and mess everything up. So thank you all so much for being so kind and helpful. There’s a lot I have to talk about; I did go to the police, and an arrest will most likely be made in the near future. Before I get into that, I think I will start with the escalation in David’s behavior and his whereabouts, and then circle back to what happened with the police. Hopefully, the timeline still makes sense. TLDR at the bottom.
In my last update, I left off with David’s disappearance after I found out what he did with my son’s clothing and confiscated it. It turns out that David was not on the run, nor missing, nor crashing on a friend’s couch. He holed up at his parents’ house, and is still currently there. My sister informed me that due to my accusations of him grooming my son, David had a “mental health crisis”, she “hopes I’m happy with myself”, and she feels the need to stay with him for support. So, in other words, he’s hiding at his parents’ house because either the guilt is getting to him, or he’s scared. Or both.
His entire family is infuriated with me. Whatever story he’s feeding them is making me look insane in their eyes. Not once did they ask me for my side of the story. After I went to the police, my sister made the decision to kick me out of her home. I saw it coming a mile away, so I’m not too upset by it; I just wish she didn’t feel such fierce loyalty to him and his family. I don’t even know how to explain to my kid that his aunt doesn’t support him. She does know I was approved for housing, and that I have no other place for our belongings at the moment, so she at least has the decency to let us keep our stuff there until we can fully move out. I guess that counts for something. Not much else to say about that; I’ve just been trying to keep my distance.
David’s behavior, though, got so much worse during this “mental health crisis”. The harassment escalated to stalking, under the guise of “wanting to clear the air”. He:
Showed up to Roman’s baseball game that was held at a different school to try and speak with him. That means he found his schedule, the exact time he was playing, and the address of that school.
Found the motel we’d been staying at (we had to move to a different one after this incident).
Created three other Instagram profiles to message him about how this is all a misunderstanding, how much he misses him, etc.
Some of these messages were awful. Things like “Don’t let other people make decisions for you”, and “You’re old enough to decide who should be in your life and who shouldn’t”. Paragraphs and paragraphs of him pouring his heart out to my son, and begging him not to tell me that he’s been reaching out. This harassment has left my son completely disillusioned. After screenshotting everything, I asked him not to read the messages anymore and to just delete them. At that point, I wanted to take his phone away but I knew he’d resent me for that. Maybe I made the wrong decision, maybe I didn’t. I don’t know.
The day David found our motel was one of the most traumatic moments of my life. I don’t know how he found us. My sister knows I’ve been staying at a motel, but I never told her which one. On that day, it was about 9pm, and I needed to go to the corner store to grab something. My son was taking a shower and getting ready for bed, as he had school the next day. The corner store was a minute’s walk away. The room we were staying in was visible from the windows of the store. I’d made this quick trip countless times. In the moment, I didn’t feel unsafe leaving my kid behind, but hindsight is always 20/20. I already feel stupid, no need to tell me. David had parked at the lot across the street, and I didn’t see his car. He waited until I was almost at the store and my back was fully turned to go for our motel room door. It was obviously locked, so he started knocking, but by then I had already heard him and was running in his direction. I nearly blacked out from the fear and adrenaline, and it’s hard to remember much. I recall that he didn’t seem angry; he just had this miserable, panicked look in his eyes. He really did look like someone who was going through a mental health crisis. I told him I was calling the police and that he needed to leave. He said that he was “entitled to a conversation” with me, but he ran off once he saw me dialing 911. To me, his reasoning is bullshit. He keeps saying that he wants a “conversation” and to “clear the air” with me, but if that were true, then why didn’t he approach me? He knew I wasn’t in the room. Why did he essentially try to break in, where he knew my son was alone? I of course documented this incident with the police, which I will get into right now.
On Monday, March 27, the day after my last update and days before the aforementioned events occurred, I went to the police for the first time. The police officer I spoke with sat me down and gave me the opportunity to talk about everything - how David was very close with Roman, what I caught him doing with his clothes, the messages, etc. Thank God for these posts, because I found myself referring back to them. Memory can be unreliable. I presented the evidence that I had as well; I showed the video footage and gave her the article of clothing I confiscated, as well as the text messages and Instagram and TikTok messages. She then told me she would contact the district attorney, which she did soon after. I was shocked by how fast the process was moving, and she told me that since it involves the potential sexual abuse of a minor, they don’t want to waste any time.
I was interviewed again by a detective, and a couple days later, they called David in for an interview. By then, the stalking had begun. During my second interview, I showed him the new messages David sent, and told him about how David showed up to the school and the motel. I don’t know what they asked David during his interview, but I can imagine that he denied everything and spun up a web of lies to try and make me look crazy. I’m not really concerned about him, though. With all of the evidence I have, David should be very, very nervous.
A detective interviewed my son as well. This is what worried me the most, and I insisted that if they didn’t have to do it, I’d rather they didn’t question him at all. But they said it would help build a stronger case, and I trust them. I was told I had to be there during his interview, since he is a minor. Roman only knows about the stalking and harassment, but he has no idea about what David did with his clothes, and I want to keep it that way for as long as I can. I personally asked the detective not to bring it up. I’d just like to shield him from it all.
They asked my son about the messages and the stalking, as well as their relationship. When asked about any physical contact they had, Roman brought something up that he didn’t initially tell me about. He said there was one instance when he and David were in the living room watching a show called Stranger Things. David randomly placed his hand on my son’s chest, left it there for a moment, then said, “I’m glad you’re alive.” I…don’t really know what to make of that, but combined with everything else he’s done, it’s very disturbing. I asked my son about it afterward, and he said that he didn’t tell me because it didn’t make him feel uncomfortable. As an isolated event, I guess it could seem like an innocent act to a thirteen year old, so I understand why he didn’t bring it up, but I don’t know. All I can do is take his word for it.
In terms of the case, they are now requesting a warrant of arrest with the clerk of the court. If this is granted, then David will be arrested and charged with Lewd and Lascivious Behavior, Harassment, and Stalking. He could end up getting up to five years in prison, maybe even more since a minor is involved. So that’s where I’m at right now, waiting for the clerk’s decision. The waiting game is stressful, but I’m trying to focus on the positives as much as I can. It’s nice to see how fast the police and detectives are working and how serious they are taking my case. All I can do is trust that the outcome will be in my favor.
After the interviews, all of David’s harassment stopped. Good thing, too; stalking and harassment of a minor is a felony, and I’m sure knowing that the police are onto him scared him. I’m not naive enough to feel safe, though. I filed a petition for a protective order after the motel incident. I’ve been feeling paranoid (not a good feeling for someone who’s bipolar) and having a lot of anxiety lately. Always looking over my shoulder, flinching when I see a stranger who looks like him, etc. “I’m entitled to a conversation with you,” he said when he tried to break into my motel room, but I don’t believe him. I think David believes he’s entitled to unrestrained access to my child due to their prior relationship. The entitlement is what scares me the most, that someone can just…take something because they feel like it belongs to them. I'm scared to go anywhere with my kid. Anytime he goes to school, I fear that it will be the last time I see him.
It hasn’t sunk in yet that my situation has developed into this. It’s been difficult for me to wrap my head around where David’s sudden attachment stemmed from. I was under the impression that predators are in general weird around children, but he never acted this way around other children, only mine. When he started dating my sister, she told me that David didn’t want kids, and she was trying to convince him to change his mind. That’s why she was so happy to see him and my son “bond”. Someone previously commented that in David’s mind, he might believe that there’s a legitimate romantic connection between him and my son. I don’t know if there’s any validity to that, and the idea of looking into it makes me nauseous. I’d rather not speculate and just pray that he gets arrested soon.
The biggest drawback is that all of this has significantly disturbed our quality of life. I know that my kid is putting on a brave face, but he’s not doing well. It’s getting to him, and I knew it would, but actually seeing this siphon his happiness away is gut-wrenching. He’s still doing fine at school, still eagerly partaking in sports and spending time with his friends, but every once in a while, he’ll do the thousand yard stare, his eyes bereft of any sort of awareness (dissociation, maybe?). He used to eat a ton but he hasn’t been finishing his food lately. He constantly says he doesn’t feel well. I can’t afford therapy right now but I spoke with his school counselor, and they want to start weekly meetings with him to check in (which my son was not thrilled about, as he does not want to bring any of this up at school). He is very open with me about his feelings and we do talk about everything that’s been going on, but there’s only so much I can do. He needs a professional.
I’m not doing well either. I am exhausted. I’ve never felt so overwhelmed in my entire life. My mental health is on a rapid decline. I’m not eating or sleeping normally. I can barely get through a shift at work without breaking down. Even my intrusive thoughts have been alarming and distressing. You don’t think you’re capable of these things until you’re in this situation. There really is no going back once you find out something like that. I don’t have a lot of people to talk to about this. I think I need help.
Hopefully my next update is more positive. Thank you for listening.
TLDR; David’s harassment escalated to stalking. I contacted the police and gave them the evidence I had. Interviews with David, my son, and me were conducted. The police are currently requesting a warrant of arrest. If he is arrested, he is looking at 5 to 10 years in prison.
Found an update on Reddit. Op isn’t being kicked out however the sister has implied she doesn’t want them there. Sister also told predators family and now they hate op and are trying to make excuses for him. Op finally went to police and found out that it was rather quick with how fast they’re moving she showed the recent texts, videos and physical probable evidence. Police then brought predator and ops son in for questioning. Predator made excuses then claims he feels “entitled” to unrestricted access of the son due to prior relationship.
Ops son said there was a physical encounter that maybe considered inappropriate where when predator and son were watching a show, predator laid his hand on sons chest for a minute and said “I’m glad that you’re alive”. Police and da think they have enough to charge him now. No more updates after that.
This was harrowing.
I’ve worked with sex offenders. The most manipulative sect of society. So glad she saw the signs and got out.
Now that is scary and very disturbing
The fact he was only crying because you didn't give him access versus calling him or suspecting he was a predator is a major red flag
Big props to the mother for being a warrior and a trailblazer, so much people out of fear would do nothing. It was difficult for her speccially for the stress, one would have thought that this kind of situation once cut would be alright but then david trying to reach her son was indicative that while she have done the correct thing this was a much bigger issue. Any mothrr that does this is a hero for herself and others. I only want that her nightmare ends soon.
This is sooo messed up. As a mom, I just cannot imagine the blind rage that I would feel toward sister’s bf. And Jesus… the frustration at the sister for not even listening, just becoming instantly super defensive!
That’s how predators prey… their crimes are overlooked and covered up just like in this scenario. Kudos to OP for being an alert mom who listened to her gut. I hope she and her son are continuing to do well and heal.
Her sister is either delusional or just desperate to not be alone. Whatever the case it’s sad and pathetic she can’t see she’s just part of the facade predators like him cultivate around themselves to avoid detection.
Idk if this is fair or true but maybe the sister knows and is trying cover him up
Well if op ever reads this, you’re not crazy, you’re not reaching out. David is a creep and he is obsessed with your kid.
I’ve been myself in a situation like that with a step-uncle too. Unfortunately when my parents “discovered” (actually I broke the news to them years later, my mother believed me but didn’t do nothing, my stepfather didn’t) it was too late. He already sa’d me, the only « good » side of the story is that at least he didn’t rape me?
But he displayed all the signs your in-law is showing, getting into knowing me and getting “attached” pretty quickly, trying to creat a kind of a “intimate relationship” with me by being digitally inappropriate, whispering things into my ears, proposing to spend some time alone just the two off us, wanting to gift me pricy things in exchange of sometimes random things etc.. Being overly obsessed with me to the point where if we attended a family gathering he would look out for me everywhere and wouldn’t stop until he finds me and wouldn’t let me go afterwards. Since I’ve always been craving for a paternal relationship that unfortunately I didn’t have with my bio father or stepfather I was completely dazzled by it until he started touching me inappropriately.
So please, take good care of your kid, pay real attention to him please. You already did a good job, keep going.
That's disgusting tom stealing his gf nephews clothes does the nasty with them then sleeps with them in his pillow my god this man needs to be put behind bars, it's also obvious that he turned off his location app because he knows op knows what he's done and that's why he's hiding cause it's only a matter of time before op reports him and the police will look for him and arrest him. Also op's sister is an idiot if she's planning to adopt a kid then she needs to understand when becoming a parent their child's saftey becomes their number 1 priority and considering how she's handling the situation with her nephew being in danger of her grooming, pedo predetor of a bf she's off to a bad start, hopefully when she's sees the evidense she'll realise her mistakes and apologise to op and nephew for refusing to belive them.
I heard this story before, are there any other updates?
There was one more update after the one in the video. David found their hotel, was stalking Roman to another baseball game that took place at a different school, made more Instagram accounts to message him, and OP finally went to the police. There was a warrant out for his arrest. OP deleted her account after that update.
@@BubblegumGirl366 I hoped that Op and her son are okay, and that guy is arrested.
And her sister didn’t believe her, to much evidence not to. Sister should run and thank op for showing her what he’s really like. I hope op and Roman are doing ok and that that damn sicko gets caught soon and sent away for a long time.
He was arrested and charged with cp, and some other charges the sister was at the trial and saw evidence and came to op to apologise but op put some distance from her sister for the time being and the ex had connects in prison so the ex bf gets r*ped everyday in the prison
@@entername8736 Is there somewhere I could find that information
Big fat red flag. Keep that boy away from that man.
I felt sick to my stomach amd so uneasy listening to this and hearing how obsessed this predator was with her son.
THAT DUDE IS A CLEAR DANGER
And this is how kids get SA'd by family members and family friends. My god. All the red flags! I would've been out of there with my son at the sign of the first red flag. Some people are so clueless!
as someone who was groomed by a family friend I can tell you its never that easy to see. Theyre manipulative as hell and every red flag is supposed to make you seem like youre crazy since it could very easily be seen as "innocent" or "familial love". its fucking disgusting, absolutely horrid creatures.
In hindsight its obvious, but usually the red flags are spaced out enough to where they make you think youre going insane for even considering it. crazy shit.
To be fair to the OP, she didn't have anywhere to go. But yeah, she should not have had to ask if the adult texting her kid all the time like a kid with a crush was overstepping boundaries.
Firstly that woman is an amazing mother to have been so busy but involved enough in her son's life to know when something was off. A lot of people would still turn a blind eye to it because you can't bite the hand that feeds you but she wasn't afraid at all.
I told my dad because I said audibly “ that is creepy” to him standing over your son with the door closed, and he agreed with you it is creepy and you should get your son out of there before something really bad happens.
Edit to add: you said church retreat and everything made so much more sense.
Yep, more access to unsuspecting children…smh
If your in america, staying in someones house is not the same as having a home, if you you tell section 8/hud this they will put you higher on the list for housing because you are homeless. If you left because of domestic violence male/female and the home is to far away they will put you higher on the list, if you have childeren under the age of 17 this will put you higher on the list, if you have a disability this will put you higher on the list, if you are a veteran this will put you higher on the list. Sorry just putting this out there for everyone who needs it. Now if you talk to them about whats going on right now they will move you to the top, but i see you got there op i hope everything works out for you and your son stay safe.
Creepy boyfriend. That's gross.
My friend has ADHD! It’s sadly much harder for him in school, and he is currently struggling with some kind of depression. I wish that I could help him, because I really do care about him. He has drawn multiple drawings of figures hanging themselves sadly. He even cried at lunch once…I respect and care about him so much, I just wish he would talk to me. Yes, I may annoy him all the time- but that’s just how best friends go. He is really my only boy best friend. My other one, well, we drifted apart after 6th grade ended.
Being in the 7th grade now, I feel so bad for him…he doesn’t get the recognition that he deserves and I wish I could make him see that I truly do care about him. I just want him to be happy. I want him to know that I’m there for him. But I can’t tell him face to face. I always hold back everything I want to say. The only way I express my appreciation for others is through writing.
I think the best thing I can do to him is write him a lengthy letter to show him how much I care. You see, many of his old friends moved schools and he started hanging out with me and my girl bestfriends because his other friends were being racist. I feel so proud of him for sticking up and distancing himself from those kinds of people. Because his life is already hard enough. I don’t want him to go through anymore pain.
I wish I could help everyone in my age group thrive, I hope I could help anyone, any age thrive. A lot of people just think that people my age are dumb. That people my age are the same. That we just gossip all day and call it day. No. We don’t do that. Those are just stereotypes. Stereotypes have formed so many horrible things. So many racist comments. So many ugly words. Stereotypes should have never been a thing. The truth is, we don’t all think the same. I happen to be an open minded person. Last year, after a quarrel between my Mother and her roommate, I wrote him a letter showing how great I knew and thought he was. How his presence in my life, brightened my soul. How he was like the Father Figure that I didn’t really get to experience. He acts like a Father, I see him as one.
What surprised me most, however, was that he cried. Not tears of anger, but beautiful, jubilant tears. They fluttered down his wrinkled face like graceful butterflies. I made a grown man cry, just by writing a single letter, at the age of 12…
I know I’m still young, and I may not know a lot, but I believe I can do it. I may not be amazing at math, but I have other strengths. Just as in books, a well-thought out character has multiple flaws. Multiple weaknesses; multiple struggles.
Know that you are not made to be perfect. Perfect DOESN’T exist. It’s a thing that people WANT to exist. You are you. Don’t let anyone think otherwise. You are beautiful. You are worth it. You matter. Please my friends, spread kindness to this world.
Lastly please remember that you are valid. That you have a purpose in this world, you just haven’t discovered it yet. Before every rainbow, there is a thunderstorm.
You are loved,
Even if you don’t think so. ❤
Of course he’s a god botherer
I think you're allowed to put a camera in a room you're staying in, no matter who's home. But check with a lawyer to be sure.
Thanks Juicy! Good narration (no weird parts where the AI is having a seizure and mispronouncing every word). Much appreciated 👍
Best wishes to OP and her son! 😢❤
20:50 i feel sick
This is terrifying
As once a victim of mild (yes. MILD, so you can skip this comment because everyone who got sa'd suffers worse) grooming, the way david bring the op's son gifts might imply as a "reward" For doing the stuffs at him
Just like how i experienced, when i was at 7th or 8th, i was (and still am) an idiot. So this one ash-whole (you know what im reffering to) told me that he could help me on my HW, in exchange of me sending him, you know what.
That's the method of groomers. Rewarding you for doing sus stuffs
I can't believe OP left it so long to do something! If I had found an unrelated adult standing over my son as he slept, that person would never be around my child again.
dang your kinda good at subway surfers
This mother is crazy , this man is a predator , move out
I think she may come off like that because they have been through a hard time with her abusive ex. She knows she's over protective to the point of seeing crazy. So she thinks she maybe over reacting but at the same time she's feeling that gut instinct of something is just not right. The dude is definitely a predator for sure
I NEED to if she showed the evidence to her sister!!!!
Has there been any more updates
In some comments, yes, OP did go to the police, shared all evidence, and only mentioned that police and DA has enough case evidence against him. That's all I've seen. Hope this helps!
Get OUT now! Find yourself a new place asap .
You must've missed the several updates. She applied for public housing and was approved. They're moving in a few weeks. Her sister let them keep the majority of their things in her house until she can fully move out.
I hope we get an update
Idk I feel kind of bad but when she said church retreat I kind of felt for sure she was definitely sus.
Why? 93% of convicted child sexual predators describe themselves as "religious" or "very religious". Several of them even explicitly said they targeted victims within the church because religious people are gullible. It's basically a red flag.
No mention of the father being made aware of all of this?
Even the stalking of the kid?
She mentions her ex being abusive towards her and a little abusive towards her son so there's not much interaction with him.
The father abuses him verbally. That's just another side of the same coin. He's not helpful at all.
@OKAYOKAY420 I get it. But some part of me wants to believe that a father would want to protect his son from this kind of predator.
It's wishful thinking on my part I'm sure.
@@a_noelles Unfortunately abusers usually do not want to protect their victims. They either will want to abuse their victims again or will allow for them to be abused by someone else knowingly. I've never seen any different. Abusive parents and partners are especially the worst in these sorts of situations.
@@magicalmomo9987 🥺
Im a bit confused on what he did with the kids underwear, like..could someone explain? I think i have an idea but not sure
If it’s her and her son maybe she should sleep in the room with him. Also. Have a convo with David , the sister and your son to not be texting and calling maybe even change his number
David and the sister were diddling him together
Why so Many Arm Pits though
1 Corinthians 15:1-4
Authorized (King James) Version
15 Moreover, brethren, I declare unto you the gospel which I preached unto you, which also ye have received, and wherein ye stand; 2 by which also ye are saved, if ye keep in memory what I preached unto you, unless ye have believed in vain. 3 For I delivered unto you first of all that which I also received, how that Christ died for our sins according to the scriptures; 4 and that he was buried, and that he rose again the third day according to the scriptures:
❤
I believe true to heart and not in vain.
Really sounds a lot like paranoia tho
Are you slow?
Paranoia with evidence? Be so for real right now.
@@missboss8759 are you?
@@yakuultforthewin did I said it was? I said sounds a lot like it, hence it wouldn't be easy for others to believe it, I've been there.
@@Hostile.weasel
No but I think your mother and father are brother and sister.
"I love him more than I love myself"
That's great and all but it's a little weird that she feels the need to say it, almost as if that's an explanation for how much she loves him. Loving your children more than yourself is such a truistic statement that it feels suspicious to mention without some type of insinuation or other reason to say it.
Shut up
👀 did his mother say that? I didn’t catch it but I feel like its valid for how distressed op seemed the entire post though. :3 sometimes when people are nervous that’s how writing comes out. That’s how I think personally though anyways.
I can't say I fully agree or disagree with your statement but I feel obligated to like your comment just because you introduced me to a very interesting word that I had no idea existed...for a second I thought you meant "altruistic" so I had to google it, thanks for unintentionally making my vocabulary stronger :)
The reason to say it is that she found a predator in her child's room with the door closed and she's terrified of something happening to her kid.