Please share your best tips for having two kids! This video is sponsored by Huckleberry, a free sleep tracking (and lots of other things) www.heyshayla.com/huckleberryyt
Getting my second baby down for naps was one of the hardest things for me! I literally just had to leave my son alone in the living room for sometimes 30 minute chunks of time while I got the baby to sleep. It was crazy and I felt so bad for ignoring him. But the good news is that kids adapt! And he started to learn how to entertain himself much better
Subscribed INSTANTLY when you started talking about how baby #2 was in your arms while baby #1 was needing wiped, all while you have to go to the bathroom too. Such real descriptions! I love when moms are for real! Thank you for being so raw. Can't wait to watch more videos! 😊
@heyshayla I could almost cry watching this video. I’m 9 months pp with my third baby, and it’s still the same. My personal hygiene is out the window, and I probably shower max 3 times a week🤣😂😭 I had the insane anxiety with my first, didn’t sleep for 18 months with the second....and this third baby, well....she’s magical. She’s chill, sweet as can be, and happy to be along for the ride. Thank you for making this video for the world of moms. It’s raw and obviously took work to make so thoughtfully. It’s the solidarity for me....I needed it TODAY! ✊🏽
It seems like a lot of moms struggle with getting daily showers in so I'm just going to share what we do. My husband, 6 mo baby and I all eat dinner together then shower together, then he reads her a bedtime story and I nursed her for about 10m till she's sleepy/or asleep then lay her in her bed. Doing this routine really helps baby to know bedtime is coming soon and start to power down. And showering together has been amazing, we just pass her back and forth as we each wash off and she LOVES it! We have one of those rain shower heads and it's soft and gentle and showering is one of her favorite activities. And if I need to wash my hair I just do it once hubby gets out and dressed, he takes babygirl and gets her in pjs and reads her her bedtime story while I wash my hair and get dried off and dressed. We've been doing this since she was born and she loves it and doesn't freak out getting water in her face which is great because now when we go to the pool and she gets splashed she doesn't get scared or cry because she's used to it!
This sounds amazing!!!! I'm inspired! I've been trying to figure out a good wind-down routine for our 7-week old. He's extremely sweet and easygoing, doesn't cry much, but he's very easily overstimulated and doesn't wind down easily. He just gets all excited and wide-eyed and lays in his bassinet for such a long time without complaining -- then suddenly gets super overtired and he wails and sobs! It's so sad! So I've been just feeding to sleep every night and hoping he'll stay down....but I know we need more of a routine than that, so he gets a signal that it's bedtime.
Girl, the last 4 minutes of this video was exactly what I needed to hear! I think about adding a second to our family and this is the kinda pep talk I came here for. Thanks, Shayla!
Amen, sister! With my first, listening to her cry was like instant panic attack! With my second, I came home from the hospital a single mom with a newborn and 2 year old. Like you said, sometimes there is no other option than to cry. I had to bathe and get the toddler to bed, and sometimes the baby would have to cry for 20 or 30 minutes while I did that. Did I hate it? Yes, but it was literally the only way. He’s much more chill and go with the flow than she is, and I do think some of it has to do with the fact that it’s impossible to give the second as much attention, especially if you don’t have another set of hands around.
So I’m a young mom (23) and I have a 2 month old and a 14 month old and my God was this video just like spot on. I needed this video. I struggled for a while and I’m getting the hang of it now. And knowing it’s happening just as is with other moms is very reassuring. Learning how to be a mom of two while being a home maker, and a wife annndddd finding time for yourself. It’s tough but I accept the challenge daily.
Every single word was so relatable. I have a 2 year old and 3 month old as well! Girl and boy. What you said about her starting and sweet and then throwing a book. So true haha. It’s awesome that you’re working with a consultant. Their is so much stigma around sleep training but their are so many approaches. It’s not one size fits all. With my 3 month old, he’s been sleeping in a bassinet at night and for naps because I find it really hard to baby wear him that long. You were asking about how to manage naps. I usually stagger them by 10 minutes so I can do the routine and the other one just waits. I usually do toddler first. So she goes down at noon, then baby shortly after. She goes down at 7, then baby at 730 pm. He currently does one night feed around 3/4/5 am depending on the night. I also know the regression is coming and I’m much more prepared. I’ve weaned him off all sleep aids (swaddling, soother, snuggle me organic, nursing to sleep, etc) so that should help! And yes… you just figure it all out. You’re so right.
OMG I love these rants! Soooo good. I just found out I'm pregnant with my second 3 days ago. My son is 2 1/2. I'm so excited but I'm also looking at you and just face-palming 🤦♀ I love it. It's gonna be chaos ❤😂
Best wishes to you both! I was a nanny for 9 years and personally think this is an excellent age gap. Not too far but not too close either. I noticed that younger children had a harder time adjusting since they had fewer words and higher needs. But you don't want them to be so old (5+ years apart) that they grow up separately and barely know each other. So this will be the age gap I'm aiming for when I eventually have my second! Hope it all goes well for you!! It'll be chaos but so wonderful too....
OMG same for me, everything you say in this video ! My 2 year old was horrible for naps at 4months (exactly like you described) but my 6months old just breezed through the 4month sleep regression! Hoping this gives you some hope! :)
Shayla! I have a 15mon and a 10week old!! I can not thank you enough for the is video!! You hit the nail on the head!!!!!!! Literally every story, every event you described if what I'm goin through!!! Parenting it the wildest ride I've ever been on and you've made it so much easier for me! All I can say is Thank You but that it's enough words for how much your videos mean to me!!
Super super helpful because I get in the zone every now and then that I am not a good mom because I got irritated or angry for sometime that things didn't go the way I wanted. Good to know it happens with others too, I am not alone... Thank you so much ❤️
I think everyone can appreciate your honesty! Nothing worse than sugar coating it and misleading new moms 😩 I wish more people were more honest about their struggles 🤍
I always relate so much to your content. My kids just turned 1 and 2. I had quite a few people tell me they wouldn’t nap at the same time and they do! It takes a while to get through all the short infant naps but once you get to two to three naps a day it’s much easier to overlap one.
Barely ever comment on videos but this was exactly what I needed to hear! So refreshing, we have an almost 2 year old and we're due our second little girl in 12 days time. Thanks so much for the honesty, love your videos! xx
I am so grateful after many months of chaos my husband and I finally have a system that involves him waking up and feeding our 10mo, while I get a couple extra hours of sleep. I am hoping it will transition well when we have our second.
Thank you for the honesty and positivity! It’s refreshing to have a realistic perspective on the difficulties, yet the reassurance that it all sorts itself out… eventually lol 😊.
My daughter (2.5) wasn’t jealous of my son when he arrived either. She cycled between love/cuddles and indifference. BUT that all changed when he became mobile. He started being Abel to touch her stuff and needed different attention from me and that really changed her attitude it seemed. We started having more behaviour issues and she was more aggressive (not in a mean way but just in terms of trying to give him hugs and help him move and stuff. It was like she realized he wasn’t as fragile anymore). So be prepared for shifts as always as they both grow.
I've also heard that sometimes at first the older child thinks the younger one is just a visitor. So the adjustment problems come later when they realize that baby is here to stay.....
@@emilys3638 yes that could be. It would be all subconscious though for sure as my toddler has never made any indications towards thinking the baby is leaving or that she doesn’t enjoy him. On the contrary she knows he’s part of our family and seemed to really get through that easily. It’s more that he’s getting into her toys and that she has to take turns and share lol
Aaaahhh. Oh my, the timing for this is just perfect. My second baby is due in a couple of months and there’s just so much anxiety because I have no idea how to handle everything. So thank you for this video! And also, PLEEEEASE do a video on Aliyah’s sleep and what you guys did on those 10 days? My firstborn also shares our bed, and I still don’t know what I’m going to do when the second one is born 😂
We did so much tummy time in the pack in play! You can even put a baby gate around a pack in play in the corner. That’s what we did because my second loved tummy time and my first was toooo curious. My first would watch tv in a baby safe room while I put my little babe down for a nap. But now that’s he’s more independent at 3 he can play in his room and do some quiet time while we do nap. He loves it because it gives him extra time to play before his own nap.
I commented a question but then you answered it (I need to practice patients I guess lol) so instead I’ll just say you’re doing incredible girl! I love every single video you post and you’re killing this mom thing (even if you don’t feel like it all the time). Your girls are so lucky to have you!
Thanks for being real. So many of us can relate. I totally recommend sleep/lactation consultants. Life changing.👌🏼 And you’re right. You’re GOING to figure this out. Thank you for being such a thoughtful and purposeful mother.
so glad you posted this! I'm not having another child but I am going back to work and for me work is nannying. the second child I'm taking care of is only two months younger than mine! my biggest advice is to find patterns in their behavior. those patterns will change but it lets you anticipate their needs. I use Huckleberry and I love it! once you use huckleberry finding patterns will make more sense.
Oh man … all of this is so true and so honest. !! I have a 19 mth old and 11 wk old. Tandem feeding. Navigating everything everyday … while packing to move house with a husband who works nights … but that’s all 😰😂 I’ve come to accept that we start afresh each day and so what we can as best we can in that day. 💕
Wow Girl Seth has had the Night Shift and holy crap is it hard. AND moving AND tandem. Know that you are giving them such a gift (yourself) and you’ll never look back regretting you weren’t there for them. Good job mama
Sooooooooo glad you put words to my feelings 4 year old and 2 month old .. the grief of not being able to parent the 2nd like the 1st.. tryna be momma bear to both …but I am also getting the hang of it …
When my son hit the four month regression what I would do is set my toddler up with a show or an activity and I got an extra baby monitor for the living room. I took my baby upstairs to nurse him to sleep and I could still watch my toddler over the monitor to make sure she was safe. I’m still doing it now and she’s 3 and my son is 8 months old.
I just watched it. Have a new Baby and 4,5 year old and my experience is really different, because of the bigger age gap I think. My older one is really selfsufficient and does a lot on her own. But making time for selfcare is a big one!
Oh my gosh YES! My toddler is the same way! She is sweet to her sister (2 months) and then takes her paci away or hits her. 🤦🏽♀️ it’s such a crazy life with two kids!
My sister's youngest took a year to start walking because he older brother kept pushing him back down, because "hims is being naughty, hims is trying to walk! Hims is not allowed to walk, hims is just baby!"
Thanks Shayla. I’m 36 weeks pregnant and have a 20 month old who IS NOT sleeping well right now. It has me freaking out a bit but your video has helped. Thank you! Looking forward to your toddler sleep video because idk what yo do but it sounds like you tried the Ferber method?? I have been laying with my toddler every night too since weaning/nursing to sleep so I’m in the same boat 😅 HELP!
Oh my goodness, yes, every baby is so different. I just had baby #5 and he is the first since baby #1 that wont be put down almost ever, so I have maybe a couple hours a day to get everything done and sometimes its not even that long.
You are just the best! I love everything about your videos and recently started listening to your podcast and the way you just are you is so great. I'm so glad you're figuring things out with Esme, you can just tell you're a legit mom 😊
Agree with all the things! But also I need the toddler sleep video now 😂 we are in the same boat! I have a 4 month old and my two year old is taking FOREVER to get down. I’ll be here until the next video drops haha
My daughter will be turning 2 a week after my second baby will be born... I'm more scared about how I'm going to share my time and energy and love with both of them equally. I want to love and spend time with this new baby as much as I did with my toddler. It give me anxiety.. I'm already feeling guilty that we'll be staying in the hospital for 2 days without her 💔 somedays I feel that hopefully we'll just be there for a day and then go home but I think it's important to spend that first 48 hours together to bond.. now I'm over thinking again 😬
Yup yup and wait till you have a 3rd… both my 2 yo and my 4 yo sleep routine got obliterated… baby is almost 5 months and we’re still working on getting back to normal 😭😭😭
I cannot wait for the sleep training video. I have a 21 month old and am due with my second in less than 2 months. Maybe I could get on top of it before he's here. 😂
I'm laughing so hard at this because I also have a two-year-old and a 4 month old and my toddler will do the exact same thing! He'll go over and pet his brother and kiss him and then punch him on the head. Like what, why?! Haha
THIS!!! Ahhh this came at the perfect time because my husband and I have been talking about baby number two and I have so much anxiety thinking about having another and schedules ect. Our daughter is SO similar to your first and I related to basically everything you said in this!!! She’s 15 months and nurses to sleep and still has to be rocked and we also cosleep. I am at the point where I want to start a floor bed in her room and need to wean her from nursing to sleep. PLEASE do you have any advice to help?? I’m desperate mama haha. Thank you! Loved the video!
@heyshayla did you ever make a video about how you managed through the sleep regressions with a toddler and your younger child? If not, please do! I’m early expecting our second and I’m in panic mode already as my toddler does not value his sleep 😂
I would love to know where you get your scrunchies from Also highly interested in the sleep training video my first daughter learned to sleep by herself very fast but with my second daughter it’s awful she’s still up at least 3 times through the night and she’s 10 months old she also can’t cry herself to sleep she’ll scream for hours if I let her 🤦🏻♀️
One of my concerns is teaching my toddler (under 2) I can’t pick her up all the time. We have been practicing waiting, but I’m concerned when the newborn comes. Anyone else have issues with that? Maybe it will resolve itself. Just curious!
NEED a video about toddler sleep training! I’m due with my second next month and am so worried about my 2 year old. We lay with her until she falls asleep too.
@heyshayla would love to hear more about how your sleep trained your toddler. Which consultant did you use? How did you feel about the method? You said it only took 10 days!! Would you do it again?
Can AJ open the California Beach Co sides, or throw things into it? It may be a safe place for tummy time? Not sure, have heard from another mama that worked for her. You're doing great!
Maybe I'm certifiably crazy, but I'm trying to conceive my second as a single mom by choice, so while my toddler will have 50/50 custody with his dad a new baby will be my full time single responsibility. I just keep telling myself that the challenges will be worth it.
So I’m still pregnant with number 2 but I take showers with my 14 month old. We do it after breakfast. She doesn’t fully get washed with soap and shampoo and such but just like to hang out naked and play with the water and some foam letters. Plan for baby number 2 is put her/him in a bouncer or do floor time in front of shower while me and number 1 shower. We’ll see how that goes lol.
Do you not take your kid to the kindergarden? I'm getting ready for my second but my first son 2 year old is normally going to the kindergarden. I'm happy he loves it so much :)
Who did you use for sleep for your toddler? Because it sounds like my kid. I have to lay with him until he falls asleep and he's going to scream cry if no one lays with him. It was fine until he moved to a big boy bed. But I'm not going to be able to do that when the baby comes. We need a sleep consultant to help that's going to be gentle and not expect him to cry because I don't want that. Helpppp.
I only have one, a six month old, but I want a second before too long, but the idea of number two is overwhelming because it was so hard for so long. I knew it would be hard for the first two months, but it was hard until 4.5 months until we could finally sleep train. She was always a horrible sleeper, and I hated/hate baby wearing. I have a bad back and find it very uncomfortable, so she was either not napping, or I’d be rocking her to sleep for ages before she’d get to sleep, and even then she slept horribly. I am a bad sleeper too, and waking up even a few times at night was hard, and I’d have to be in bed for 12 hours to get enough sleep. People have told me that ‘there’s always a hard baby and an easy baby’, but there is no reason that has to be true. I will get through it, but dang will it be hard. I had some help early on, but I’ve had less help from my parents than I was hoping for. Hopefully they will be more willing to take the toddler for some fun for the first few months when number two comes along.
My baby was the opposite. She was a great sleeper up until 4 and a half months when started crawling. Now she will only sleep in my bed with me or she cries.
My baby is 13 months and she's still breastfed to sleep, I'm hoping once she learns how to fall sleep independently that i can start planning my next one. It's been so exhausting putting her to sleep and then waking up 3 times through the night, I'd be terrified of multitasking a newborn too.
I am mentally preparing for having a 20 month old and newborn. Your videos helped me prepare for baby #1 as well. The order of operations stands out for sure. I will keep that in mind that it is totally normal to have even more things to do at once and not having clear way to get it all done. Also definitely agree I tried way too hard to get my first down for naps and when he didn't sleep long or at all I would cry in frustration and it would ruin my day. I will definitely go with the flow more this time. Okay question...you mentioned putting AJ in daycare. But you also did EC and cloth diapers most of the time. I am assuming she's not completely potty trained yet, right? I am told that daycare doesn't do cloth diapers and we did solely cloth diapers. What was your experience with that? Did you just do disposables for her for daycare? I only used disposables as a newborn and his skin was all red anytime I had extras to use up in between cloth diapers. Thanks for always having great advice and keeping it real! Love you guys.
She’s potty trained! 2 years 3 months old ish. We started when she was 20 months. It took a few months for her to get the hang of it. Our daycare does disposables, but you’re probably going to have to buy high quality diapers so his little booty doesn’t get red 😭😭 We have always done disposables when they’re first born, over night and if we’re away from home for a extended time. She started daycare around 20 months old I think
Bob is soooo good. We found ours on marketplace. I can steer it with one hand, goes over all terrain and even goes through most doors (even though it doesn’t look like it)
No but that’s a great idea. Instead of toddler proofing though I just make everything toddler accessible. So the lowest drawer is hers. Basically everything she can access is safe
@@heyshayla thank you! I've tried two different carriers and so far my 6 week old hates them. He also doesn't fall asleep very easily, hates the carrier, hates the carseat. I have a 2 year old and the only option for me is to sit her down in a room in front of the tv while i rock my baby to sleep in his dark room with the sound machine very stressfully while i hope my toddler isn't getting into trouble. It's awful. glad your baby sleeps in the carrier.
Please share your best tips for having two kids!
This video is sponsored by Huckleberry, a free sleep tracking (and lots of other things) www.heyshayla.com/huckleberryyt
22 month old and 2 month old over here- every single word of this was SO RELATABLE. Thank you for being honest and real.
Getting my second baby down for naps was one of the hardest things for me! I literally just had to leave my son alone in the living room for sometimes 30 minute chunks of time while I got the baby to sleep. It was crazy and I felt so bad for ignoring him. But the good news is that kids adapt! And he started to learn how to entertain himself much better
Subscribed INSTANTLY when you started talking about how baby #2 was in your arms while baby #1 was needing wiped, all while you have to go to the bathroom too. Such real descriptions! I love when moms are for real! Thank you for being so raw. Can't wait to watch more videos! 😊
Same 😂 so real love it!
It’s raw reality for me right now with a 1 month old and 18 month old
@heyshayla I could almost cry watching this video. I’m 9 months pp with my third baby, and it’s still the same. My personal hygiene is out the window, and I probably shower max 3 times a week🤣😂😭
I had the insane anxiety with my first, didn’t sleep for 18 months with the second....and this third baby, well....she’s magical. She’s chill, sweet as can be, and happy to be along for the ride.
Thank you for making this video for the world of moms. It’s raw and obviously took work to make so thoughtfully. It’s the solidarity for me....I needed it TODAY! ✊🏽
I love hearing this too!! It’s insane to me how each baby can be different!!
It seems like a lot of moms struggle with getting daily showers in so I'm just going to share what we do. My husband, 6 mo baby and I all eat dinner together then shower together, then he reads her a bedtime story and I nursed her for about 10m till she's sleepy/or asleep then lay her in her bed. Doing this routine really helps baby to know bedtime is coming soon and start to power down. And showering together has been amazing, we just pass her back and forth as we each wash off and she LOVES it! We have one of those rain shower heads and it's soft and gentle and showering is one of her favorite activities. And if I need to wash my hair I just do it once hubby gets out and dressed, he takes babygirl and gets her in pjs and reads her her bedtime story while I wash my hair and get dried off and dressed. We've been doing this since she was born and she loves it and doesn't freak out getting water in her face which is great because now when we go to the pool and she gets splashed she doesn't get scared or cry because she's used to it!
Love this!!
This sounds amazing!!!! I'm inspired! I've been trying to figure out a good wind-down routine for our 7-week old. He's extremely sweet and easygoing, doesn't cry much, but he's very easily overstimulated and doesn't wind down easily. He just gets all excited and wide-eyed and lays in his bassinet for such a long time without complaining -- then suddenly gets super overtired and he wails and sobs! It's so sad! So I've been just feeding to sleep every night and hoping he'll stay down....but I know we need more of a routine than that, so he gets a signal that it's bedtime.
Girl, the last 4 minutes of this video was exactly what I needed to hear! I think about adding a second to our family and this is the kinda pep talk I came here for. Thanks, Shayla!
Gosh for a moment, I thought my baby was crying, I put the video on pause to go get him and then I realized it was Shayla's baby!! Solidarity
Same! Lol looking for my baby
Oh girl the order of operations YES.
😂😂😂 RIGHT
Amen, sister! With my first, listening to her cry was like instant panic attack! With my second, I came home from the hospital a single mom with a newborn and 2 year old. Like you said, sometimes there is no other option than to cry. I had to bathe and get the toddler to bed, and sometimes the baby would have to cry for 20 or 30 minutes while I did that. Did I hate it? Yes, but it was literally the only way. He’s much more chill and go with the flow than she is, and I do think some of it has to do with the fact that it’s impossible to give the second as much attention, especially if you don’t have another set of hands around.
I had the panic attacks too with my first!
So I’m a young mom (23) and I have a 2 month old and a 14 month old and my God was this video just like spot on. I needed this video. I struggled for a while and I’m getting the hang of it now. And knowing it’s happening just as is with other moms is very reassuring. Learning how to be a mom of two while being a home maker, and a wife annndddd finding time for yourself. It’s tough but I accept the challenge daily.
Oh my goodness!! I’m 23 too! And I have a three month old and 15 month old!!!! That’s so wild!
I watched this video a few months ago and forgot like all of it. Back 1 week into 2 babies 2 and under and immediately you're describing my situation.
I think I need to re watch now that I’m on three
Every single word was so relatable. I have a 2 year old and 3 month old as well! Girl and boy. What you said about her starting and sweet and then throwing a book. So true haha. It’s awesome that you’re working with a consultant. Their is so much stigma around sleep training but their are so many approaches. It’s not one size fits all. With my 3 month old, he’s been sleeping in a bassinet at night and for naps because I find it really hard to baby wear him that long. You were asking about how to manage naps. I usually stagger them by 10 minutes so I can do the routine and the other one just waits. I usually do toddler first. So she goes down at noon, then baby shortly after. She goes down at 7, then baby at 730 pm. He currently does one night feed around 3/4/5 am depending on the night. I also know the regression is coming and I’m much more prepared. I’ve weaned him off all sleep aids (swaddling, soother, snuggle me organic, nursing to sleep, etc) so that should help! And yes… you just figure it all out. You’re so right.
OMG I love these rants! Soooo good. I just found out I'm pregnant with my second 3 days ago. My son is 2 1/2. I'm so excited but I'm also looking at you and just face-palming 🤦♀ I love it. It's gonna be chaos ❤😂
Same!!!! I’m 7 weeks pregnant and have a 2.5 year old daughter. Excited but nervous!! 😅
Best wishes to you both! I was a nanny for 9 years and personally think this is an excellent age gap. Not too far but not too close either. I noticed that younger children had a harder time adjusting since they had fewer words and higher needs. But you don't want them to be so old (5+ years apart) that they grow up separately and barely know each other. So this will be the age gap I'm aiming for when I eventually have my second! Hope it all goes well for you!! It'll be chaos but so wonderful too....
OMG same for me, everything you say in this video ! My 2 year old was horrible for naps at 4months (exactly like you described) but my 6months old just breezed through the 4month sleep regression! Hoping this gives you some hope! :)
No way!!!!!!!!! 🤞🤞🤞 I didn’t know that was possible hahaha
Shayla! I have a 15mon and a 10week old!! I can not thank you enough for the is video!! You hit the nail on the head!!!!!!!
Literally every story, every event you described if what I'm goin through!!! Parenting it the wildest ride I've ever been on and you've made it so much easier for me! All I can say is Thank You but that it's enough words for how much your videos mean to me!!
😭😭😭 thank you for taking the time to write this! ❤️
Just found out I’m pregnant with #2 (we have an almost 16 month old) and trying to get as much real advice as possible…thank you!
Super super helpful because I get in the zone every now and then that I am not a good mom because I got irritated or angry for sometime that things didn't go the way I wanted. Good to know it happens with others too, I am not alone...
Thank you so much ❤️
I think everyone can appreciate your honesty! Nothing worse than sugar coating it and misleading new moms 😩 I wish more people were more honest about their struggles 🤍
I so appreciate how you communicate things! You are authentic and encouraging.
I always relate so much to your content. My kids just turned 1 and 2. I had quite a few people tell me they wouldn’t nap at the same time and they do! It takes a while to get through all the short infant naps but once you get to two to three naps a day it’s much easier to overlap one.
Barely ever comment on videos but this was exactly what I needed to hear! So refreshing, we have an almost 2 year old and we're due our second little girl in 12 days time. Thanks so much for the honesty, love your videos! xx
I’m with you! 2 years old and one month baby. Tough times but it’ll somehow work out. We can do this.
I am so grateful after many months of chaos my husband and I finally have a system that involves him waking up and feeding our 10mo, while I get a couple extra hours of sleep. I am hoping it will transition well when we have our second.
Thank you for the honesty and positivity! It’s refreshing to have a realistic perspective on the difficulties, yet the reassurance that it all sorts itself out… eventually lol 😊.
This is so real, I love you
My daughter (2.5) wasn’t jealous of my son when he arrived either. She cycled between love/cuddles and indifference.
BUT that all changed when he became mobile. He started being Abel to touch her stuff and needed different attention from me and that really changed her attitude it seemed. We started having more behaviour issues and she was more aggressive (not in a mean way but just in terms of trying to give him hugs and help him move and stuff. It was like she realized he wasn’t as fragile anymore).
So be prepared for shifts as always as they both grow.
Oh great to know!!!
I've also heard that sometimes at first the older child thinks the younger one is just a visitor. So the adjustment problems come later when they realize that baby is here to stay.....
@@emilys3638 yes that could be. It would be all subconscious though for sure as my toddler has never made any indications towards thinking the baby is leaving or that she doesn’t enjoy him. On the contrary she knows he’s part of our family and seemed to really get through that easily.
It’s more that he’s getting into her toys and that she has to take turns and share lol
LOVE HOW real and relatable this is to my life with a bow 3 year old and 5 month old in the 1st 3 months 😂😂😂
Aaaahhh. Oh my, the timing for this is just perfect. My second baby is due in a couple of months and there’s just so much anxiety because I have no idea how to handle everything. So thank you for this video! And also, PLEEEEASE do a video on Aliyah’s sleep and what you guys did on those 10 days? My firstborn also shares our bed, and I still don’t know what I’m going to do when the second one is born 😂
We did so much tummy time in the pack in play! You can even put a baby gate around a pack in play in the corner. That’s what we did because my second loved tummy time and my first was toooo curious.
My first would watch tv in a baby safe room while I put my little babe down for a nap. But now that’s he’s more independent at 3 he can play in his room and do some quiet time while we do nap. He loves it because it gives him extra time to play before his own nap.
I feel this so intensely! Very accurate! I have a 6 week old and a 25 month old and just yesss to everything!
I commented a question but then you answered it (I need to practice patients I guess lol) so instead I’ll just say you’re doing incredible girl! I love every single video you post and you’re killing this mom thing (even if you don’t feel like it all the time). Your girls are so lucky to have you!
Thank you so much for this! 4 months pregnant with a 13 month old and this was very reassuring.
Thanks for being real. So many of us can relate. I totally recommend sleep/lactation consultants. Life changing.👌🏼
And you’re right. You’re GOING to figure this out. Thank you for being such a thoughtful and purposeful mother.
LIFE CHANGING!!!! I had no idea!!!
so glad you posted this! I'm not having another child but I am going back to work and for me work is nannying. the second child I'm taking care of is only two months younger than mine!
my biggest advice is to find patterns in their behavior. those patterns will change but it lets you anticipate their needs. I use Huckleberry and I love it! once you use huckleberry finding patterns will make more sense.
Oh man … all of this is so true and so honest. !! I have a 19 mth old and 11 wk old. Tandem feeding. Navigating everything everyday … while packing to move house with a husband who works nights … but that’s all 😰😂 I’ve come to accept that we start afresh each day and so what we can as best we can in that day. 💕
Wow Girl Seth has had the Night Shift and holy crap is it hard. AND moving AND tandem. Know that you are giving them such a gift (yourself) and you’ll never look back regretting you weren’t there for them. Good job mama
Thank you! My daughter is 3 weeks old and my son is almost 4. I identify with a lot of this video.
Sooooooooo glad you put words to my feelings 4 year old and 2 month old .. the grief of not being able to parent the 2nd like the 1st.. tryna be momma bear to both …but I am also getting the hang of it …
I LOVE the Huckleberry app! I also learned about it from you, so thank you! I've used the "diaper" section for EC observing. So nice!
Yay!!!!!! That’s a great idea to use it to track ec!!
When my son hit the four month regression what I would do is set my toddler up with a show or an activity and I got an extra baby monitor for the living room.
I took my baby upstairs to nurse him to sleep and I could still watch my toddler over the monitor to make sure she was safe.
I’m still doing it now and she’s 3 and my son is 8 months old.
Sitting here watching this video holding my 9 day old while my 2.5 year old runs a muck! Thank you for making this video!
I just watched it. Have a new Baby and 4,5 year old and my experience is really different, because of the bigger age gap I think. My older one is really selfsufficient and does a lot on her own. But making time for selfcare is a big one!
Oh my gosh YES! My toddler is the same way! She is sweet to her sister (2 months) and then takes her paci away or hits her. 🤦🏽♀️ it’s such a crazy life with two kids!
My sister's youngest took a year to start walking because he older brother kept pushing him back down, because "hims is being naughty, hims is trying to walk! Hims is not allowed to walk, hims is just baby!"
I'm about to have 2 under 2 and this is so helpful, thank you!! I plan on showering while my oldest is at daycare
Smart!
Thanks Shayla. I’m 36 weeks pregnant and have a 20 month old who IS NOT sleeping well right now. It has me freaking out a bit but your video has helped. Thank you!
Looking forward to your toddler sleep video because idk what yo do but it sounds like you tried the Ferber method?? I have been laying with my toddler every night too since weaning/nursing to sleep so I’m in the same boat 😅 HELP!
It’s called the “sleep lady shuffle” I think? Video is coming out next week!
Thank you, I can’t wait! That looks like a course? Looking forward to the video.
Thinking about when to have my second. Thanks for this video.. love the ranting as well. Keep the content coming 🥰🥰🥰
Oh my goodness, yes, every baby is so different. I just had baby #5 and he is the first since baby #1 that wont be put down almost ever, so I have maybe a couple hours a day to get everything done and sometimes its not even that long.
Shayla, thank you so much! Your information is always so helpful. Love you girl!
You are just the best! I love everything about your videos and recently started listening to your podcast and the way you just are you is so great. I'm so glad you're figuring things out with Esme, you can just tell you're a legit mom 😊
Had to pause your video at the end thinking it was my own baby crying!! Haha
Thank you for this! You are so funny and adorable and insightful 🥰 expecting my second in 3 months when my son will be 3. So helpful!
Oh my word, I relate so much to many of these sentiments!! We have a 21 month old and a 2 month old. 💗
I neeeeeded this video! 2 under 2 in January!
Yessss- just had a baby and have a 2.5 year old. Can relate to the sweet talking followed by a big slap from toddler to baby!
Sooooo accurate! You are describing my current life to a T! Two months PP and a 21 month old 🤪
Agree with all the things! But also I need the toddler sleep video now 😂 we are in the same boat! I have a 4 month old and my two year old is taking FOREVER to get down. I’ll be here until the next video drops haha
Tuesday!!
But also we went through bedrocksleep.com she does free 15 min calls and if you’re interested you might want to book a call before it comes out 😂
We had our second babies at the same time! Thanks for making this! It’s all true haha ❤
My daughter will be turning 2 a week after my second baby will be born... I'm more scared about how I'm going to share my time and energy and love with both of them equally. I want to love and spend time with this new baby as much as I did with my toddler. It give me anxiety.. I'm already feeling guilty that we'll be staying in the hospital for 2 days without her 💔 somedays I feel that hopefully we'll just be there for a day and then go home but I think it's important to spend that first 48 hours together to bond.. now I'm over thinking again 😬
This is so relatable!
This just hits. 6 weeks PP with my second, other babe is 22 months and it’s pure chaos!! Lol
thank you for being an inspiration to me! your an awesome mama!💜🙏🙏💜🙏💜
Yup yup and wait till you have a 3rd… both my 2 yo and my 4 yo sleep routine got obliterated… baby is almost 5 months and we’re still working on getting back to normal 😭😭😭
Omg...I commented on your IG...but this video is all me.
Love this and love you!! You inspired me to start my own momma channel so thank you ☺️
A video on how you sleep trained please! I would love to see what method you ised
I think it’s called “the sleep lady shuffle” we hired bedrocksleep.com !
I cannot wait for the sleep training video. I have a 21 month old and am due with my second in less than 2 months. Maybe I could get on top of it before he's here. 😂
Bedrocksleep.com is who we went through! She does a 15 min call for free. I say get in before the video goes live lol
I'm laughing so hard at this because I also have a two-year-old and a 4 month old and my toddler will do the exact same thing! He'll go over and pet his brother and kiss him and then punch him on the head. Like what, why?! Haha
THIS!!! Ahhh this came at the perfect time because my husband and I have been talking about baby number two and I have so much anxiety thinking about having another and schedules ect. Our daughter is SO similar to your first and I related to basically everything you said in this!!! She’s 15 months and nurses to sleep and still has to be rocked and we also cosleep. I am at the point where I want to start a floor bed in her room and need to wean her from nursing to sleep. PLEASE do you have any advice to help?? I’m desperate mama haha. Thank you! Loved the video!
Yes girl! Look at my weaning videos there are two! One is for overnight with a 14 month old!
So good! So true! Sooooo helpful.
I’m 7m pregnant and I almost cried jsut relating to you
8:02
With a 18m old boy (for more context)
Those night sleeps with no wake breaks… in my f%^#* dreams 😂
I needed this! ❤
Funny you said about cortisol levels going up, mine dropped and I had to take cortisone to get them up. I was covered in massive random bruises.
@heyshayla did you ever make a video about how you managed through the sleep regressions with a toddler and your younger child? If not, please do! I’m early expecting our second and I’m in panic mode already as my toddler does not value his sleep 😂
I would love to know where you get your scrunchies from Also highly interested in the sleep training video my first daughter learned to sleep by herself very fast but with my second daughter it’s awful she’s still up at least 3 times through the night and she’s 10 months old she also can’t cry herself to sleep she’ll scream for hours if I let her 🤦🏻♀️
One of my concerns is teaching my toddler (under 2) I can’t pick her up all the time. We have been practicing waiting, but I’m concerned when the newborn comes. Anyone else have issues with that? Maybe it will resolve itself. Just curious!
NEED a video about toddler sleep training! I’m due with my second next month and am so worried about my 2 year old. We lay with her until she falls asleep too.
We went through bedrocksleep.com and I’m sooooo glad we did! She does free 15 min chats, might be worth getting on call before the video comes out 🙌
@heyshayla would love to hear more about how your sleep trained your toddler. Which consultant did you use? How did you feel about the method? You said it only took 10 days!! Would you do it again?
I have a full video! UA-cam “heyshayla sleep training!”
Can AJ open the California Beach Co sides, or throw things into it? It may be a safe place for tummy time? Not sure, have heard from another mama that worked for her. You're doing great!
That’s what I fear is that she’d throw something in!
I’ll be looking for a video about fixing your 2 year olds sleep…. We are in the same boat with our toddler and it’s taking a big toll on us 😭
I worked with bedrocksleep.com and she was fantastic and does a free 15 min call
Maybe I'm certifiably crazy, but I'm trying to conceive my second as a single mom by choice, so while my toddler will have 50/50 custody with his dad a new baby will be my full time single responsibility. I just keep telling myself that the challenges will be worth it.
I actually paused the video at the end thinking my baby was crying lol
Hahaha nooooo that’s the worst!
So I’m still pregnant with number 2 but I take showers with my 14 month old. We do it after breakfast. She doesn’t fully get washed with soap and shampoo and such but just like to hang out naked and play with the water and some foam letters. Plan for baby number 2 is put her/him in a bouncer or do floor time in front of shower while me and number 1 shower. We’ll see how that goes lol.
We got a cosleeping thing that we used for the floor allll the time 👏👏👏
Do you not take your kid to the kindergarden? I'm getting ready for my second but my first son 2 year old is normally going to the kindergarden. I'm happy he loves it so much :)
She’s not old enough yet
Who did you use for sleep for your toddler? Because it sounds like my kid. I have to lay with him until he falls asleep and he's going to scream cry if no one lays with him. It was fine until he moved to a big boy bed. But I'm not going to be able to do that when the baby comes. We need a sleep consultant to help that's going to be gentle and not expect him to cry because I don't want that. Helpppp.
Bedrocksleep.com she does free 15 min consults! Get in before the video goes live today😂🙌
I only have one, a six month old, but I want a second before too long, but the idea of number two is overwhelming because it was so hard for so long. I knew it would be hard for the first two months, but it was hard until 4.5 months until we could finally sleep train. She was always a horrible sleeper, and I hated/hate baby wearing. I have a bad back and find it very uncomfortable, so she was either not napping, or I’d be rocking her to sleep for ages before she’d get to sleep, and even then she slept horribly.
I am a bad sleeper too, and waking up even a few times at night was hard, and I’d have to be in bed for 12 hours to get enough sleep. People have told me that ‘there’s always a hard baby and an easy baby’, but there is no reason that has to be true. I will get through it, but dang will it be hard. I had some help early on, but I’ve had less help from my parents than I was hoping for. Hopefully they will be more willing to take the toddler for some fun for the first few months when number two comes along.
My baby was the opposite. She was a great sleeper up until 4 and a half months when started crawling. Now she will only sleep in my bed with me or she cries.
My sister has two. Both hard babies!
My baby is 13 months and she's still breastfed to sleep, I'm hoping once she learns how to fall sleep independently that i can start planning my next one. It's been so exhausting putting her to sleep and then waking up 3 times through the night, I'd be terrified of multitasking a newborn too.
I’m in the exact same situation!
I am mentally preparing for having a 20 month old and newborn. Your videos helped me prepare for baby #1 as well. The order of operations stands out for sure. I will keep that in mind that it is totally normal to have even more things to do at once and not having clear way to get it all done. Also definitely agree I tried way too hard to get my first down for naps and when he didn't sleep long or at all I would cry in frustration and it would ruin my day. I will definitely go with the flow more this time. Okay question...you mentioned putting AJ in daycare. But you also did EC and cloth diapers most of the time. I am assuming she's not completely potty trained yet, right? I am told that daycare doesn't do cloth diapers and we did solely cloth diapers. What was your experience with that? Did you just do disposables for her for daycare? I only used disposables as a newborn and his skin was all red anytime I had extras to use up in between cloth diapers. Thanks for always having great advice and keeping it real! Love you guys.
She’s potty trained! 2 years 3 months old ish. We started when she was 20 months. It took a few months for her to get the hang of it.
Our daycare does disposables, but you’re probably going to have to buy high quality diapers so his little booty doesn’t get red 😭😭
We have always done disposables when they’re first born, over night and if we’re away from home for a extended time.
She started daycare around 20 months old I think
Hey Shayla did you ever end up getting a double stroller? I’m expecting my second and I’m going to be having kids with similar age gaps
Bob is soooo good. We found ours on marketplace.
I can steer it with one hand, goes over all terrain and even goes through most doors (even though it doesn’t look like it)
I downloaded the huckleberry app but idk how you stay on top of tracking everything! I'm 21 days PP and I'm so inconsistent with this app.
I use it just for sleep mostly or the things I need. I did feeding and diapers early on and now just sleep!
I have a question about bed sharing. At night, do you have them both in the same bed with you, or does Aliyah sleep in her own bed?
AJ sleeps in her own bed now. Usually until the morning then she’ll come with us for a couple hrs. I sleep in between them
Hey Shayla, thanks for your video! What book did you use to prep your first for being a big sister?
Hi Shayla, big fan here
Love your content.
Please try a different microphone, the audio here is weird.
Great feedback thank you!!
Are we the same person?
What is the baby carrier that you like?
Heyshayla.com/sakurabloomyt
What brand is that carrier you mentioned?
Heyshayla.com/sakurabloomyt
Hey, have you made a video on toddler proofing? I can't find anything. Thanks! 🙂
No but that’s a great idea. Instead of toddler proofing though I just make everything toddler accessible. So the lowest drawer is hers. Basically everything she can access is safe
@@heyshayla that's what I'm doing too lol "if you can't beat them, join them!" 😆
What is the name of the baby carrier?
Sakura bloom onbohimo
Can you tell us which baby carrier that is?
Heyshayla.com/sakurabloomyt
@@heyshayla thank you! I've tried two different carriers and so far my 6 week old hates them. He also doesn't fall asleep very easily, hates the carrier, hates the carseat. I have a 2 year old and the only option for me is to sit her down in a room in front of the tv while i rock my baby to sleep in his dark room with the sound machine very stressfully while i hope my toddler isn't getting into trouble. It's awful. glad your baby sleeps in the carrier.
Not informative 😕