AUTISTIC TEENAGER THROWN OUT OF A CHURCH | FAMILY VLOG
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- Опубліковано 19 вер 2024
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Apologies for the clickbaity title today, but once you've watched the video, you'll see that it's completely accurate! We were thrown out of the church where we've been going to bell ringing for the last month or so, with no warning and no chance to prepare Andy for it.
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ABOUT KEVIN CHAPMAN
Hi, I'm Kevin Chapman, a full-time UA-camr, author, podcaster, speaker and occasional teacher from Peterborough, UK. As part of my daily vlog I release new videos every day at 5pm UK time with topics including life as an autism family, conventions and geek culture, technology, education and tutorials and entrepreneurship.
When I left my full-time as a Computer Science teacher in July 2017, my partner, Anna, was trapped in our house by our son Andy, who is autistic and had refused to go to school for 18 months. Our daughters Lucy and Amy and our dog Dave hardly saw me because I was always working to try and solve all our problems! Today I'm a full-time content creator who's always at home when my kids get home from school (all our kids!) and Anna has been able to return to university. This channel is the story of my family's ongoing journey as family vloggers! Previously known as lollujo Vlogs.
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#autism #familyvloggers #church
I’m posting this here so I don’t have to keep posting it in reply to comments. I won’t be going over his head to the vicar, or making a complaint, or going back to try and reason with him. He made it very clear we weren’t welcome, and I have no interest in going to a place that doesn’t want us there. There are plenty more churches out there!
I would be feeling exactly the same......... You wouldn't feel comfortable there anyway...... New bells, Better Bells!! new church. It is their loss entirely.
I’m yet to watch the video but aren’t Churches supposed to be for everyone and are only owned by ‘God’? Maybe he was just banning you from the group but it’s ridiculous either way. Hopefully you find a better group for Andy with nicer, more understanding people.
I respect your decision, however I don't see contacting the vicar as going over his head. I think both sides deserve more clarity
I’ve left a comment with some details about a few bell ringing clubs around Peterborough, I think it’s totally out of order what happens to you guys, a church like that does not deserve to have Andy as a loyal fan!
Kevin Chapman Awwh guys that’s awful :( hate people like that and hope you find a new church to film bells in, loved seeing how excited Andy got watching and filming the bell ringers. However we live in a horrible world sometimes I guess love you guys xxxxxx
shame on them! A church should be more tolerant and accepting. I think you should have a chat with the vicar about what happened.
To say its a church they arent very accepting are they?
Some churches aren’t very accepting I’m not allowed in most of the churches in my area
Miles Thompson why not ?
@@mairuzu465 thats not right though religion should be about accepting everyone. This is why i hate religion they are contradicting themselves.
Reece ik I was always taught in re that religion is about love and acceptance but clearly it isn’t
What makes this even sadder is that it could have had a much different outcome if the man approached you with the intention of having a conversation rather than with accusations. If there was a miscommunication where the original woman didn't have the right to give permission, or certain members weren't happy being filmed every week, it could have been solved so much easier and nicer if they approached you wanting to have a conversation.
That's the difference. Autism aside...he didn't handle the situation politely at all. Even if Andy was NT, that was not an acceptable way to talk to him. Or to anyone for that matter. I doubt he will see your video BUT someone else belonging to that church most definitely will. Hopefully he will be spoken to about his attitude because it reflects badly on the entire organization.
dang a lot of long commen- (me falling asleep)
I hope that man watches your videos, and sees how much it meant to All of you. I hope he realises how much Andy adores the bells and churches and how he started eating other foods because of the hope of reaching the bells, and then i hope he feels utterly embarrassed and ashamed at his behaviour. The fact that he directed his feelings towards Andy and not you and Anna just goes to show that he has no idea about autism or how hurtful he was being. I just know there will be other bell ringing opportunities for Andy in the future, and I have everything crossed that you find a place to go to soon. I am so sorry this happened to you all. The genuine hurt on your face was so obvious....... and really saddened me to watch
I had a similar experience in Nottingham Winter Wonderland yesterday over filming on the Ice Mountain with my Go-Pro; both the owner and safety manager rudely told me that I couldn't film on it because of Health & Safety, even though I told them that I happen to be a fairground enthusiast, I found it difficult to understand, and after arguing with them to a point because I refused to accept, I got refused access on it and got refunded, and I had burst into tears, being upset by this (I am an autistic and a highly sensitive person). Although I was quite apologetic afterwards and the owner reluctantly accepted, and he said he might let me back on another day, he still got quite annoyed and threatened to call security if I didn't leave him alone. I just don't understand why some people deal with incidents in a rude way?
Aww
@@amalialiaiiaaiiaiaiaaiai At least you feel sorry for me, that's the main thing. :)
I agree with everything you have said, he should be ashamed of himself, Kevin told him what the films were being made for, and the way he addressed Andy ‘that one’ is totally disrespectful, he has a name, it’s ANDY!!! Kevin has done nothing wrong.
SUSIEPIP agree poor Andy he doesn’t deserve that he’s so innocent💔
They were so welcoming the first time you went. edit well done andy for doing well with the situation
Bradley Hh Imagine If This was 1 year ago
He would have a huge Meltdown
THESE ARE CHURCH GOING PEOPLE!!!????!!! SHAME ON THAT MAN CALLING HIMSELF A CHRISTIAN, he needs to go back and read his bible and mabye drop to knee and ponder. This is NOT a representation of my faith or many others faith, I'm so sorry this is the way you all were treated. No matter your faith bless you all.
I actually would urge you to take this further with someone higher up at the church. I think this is unacceptable behaviour. How can someone be unwelcome at a church? What possible harm has been done by you filming it? It all seemed incredibly positive before this incident.
grimm4 I doubt they’d want to go back now, but I agree as another person with autism could find themselves in the same situation, plus for someone running a church group it is unacceptable to treat anyone like that
Agree, he needs to contact the Vicar of the church explaining the situation and so they can contact this the leader of the bell ringing group to provide more clarity on booth sides.
While I don’t think he should go back. I do think he should tell someone who can do something about it..
What a heartbreaking situation. I thought a church was supposed to be welcoming.....shame on them. Talking to Andy like that and not you is unacceptable. I am sorry for sweet Andy. I will not contact the church but boy do I want to.
seashell0972 are you religious? If not zip it it’s your type which causes problems
@@dontfuckwithme298 my type? You are a angry person.
Don’t fuck With me this isn’t Christianity, this is just an idiot. Christians for the most part are lovely people. Hate isn’t going to solve anything.
@@dontfuckwithme298 why does being religious have to do with anything
It is more likely that he is uneducated, and just doesn’t understand. Either way it is just so sad.
When a vicar who is supposed to be kind and loving as ‘god’ says is actually discriminating against disabled children. Well done mate, you really are the child of god
Sorry guys hope feel better sending love ❤️
What happened to love thy neighbour
Ryan Dunbar it doesn’t exist in Christianity. It’s a big sham
That usually only applies when it suits them. Same with excepting homosexuality and many of the other things they oppose despite statements such as “love thy neighbour”
I’m Irish lad story lads
debenhamproductions2 just depends on the individual don't generalize
Many Christians who think they know what that means don't understand the concept.
Poor Andy he didn’t deserve that he loves the bells and I understand coz I have apsergers syndrome and maybe autism and I would hate to be kicked out of the garden centre coz I really get exited over the Xmas lights and I’m 15 for ffs makes me so pissed of how they kicked him out he’s innocent bless him I wish I was his older sister or best friend❤️❤️🌎🌎
Asperger's Syndrome is Autism. Asperger's Syndrome has been lumped into the Autism Spectrum of Disorders since the DSM 5 was published. We are branded as "high functioning Autistics" because we don't suffer from IQ deficits like those with classic or low functioning Autism do.
What an awful situation. Can't believe people are this ignorant still today. Hope Andy is doing okay.
Thats terrible, hope your all ok. Maybe you can find another group at another church for Andy, it was obvious he really enjoyed it and looked forward to it every week.
oh my god :( hope ur all okay
I’m so sorry you all had to experience that. Plus for that guy to talk to Andy that way. What harm was it for Andy to film and the excitement and joy it brings him.
We had a very similar situation involving a group activity, my son with autism and an old battleaxe!
These types of people remind me of the old school teachers that use to shame, hit and humiliate the kids.
We have moved on in society to a brighter, more inclusive future ...but these buggers are still lurking in the shadows unfortunately. They are seething with spite and anger that we have dared to toss their archaic views aside.
You will know when you have encountered one as it's enough to send shivers down the spine and trigger flashbacks lol.
Much love to you all, sorry you had to experience this xx
Me too love is true power.🌈🏳️🌈🫂💕
I see you at my church lol I’m sorry for this happening I was confused as well as I was in the pew
I'm so sorry. Andy is handling this amazingly well. I hope that you're able to find another church with a bellringers group that will welcome Andy.
Omg how could they aww I feel so sorry for you Andys favourite thing I can’t imagine how hard it is going to be in the future
Please don't let them get away with this. Please complain, you are well within your right to.
And this is one of the reasons so many have turned away from religion..It’s not about love, understanding, non judgemental etc. It’s about money, power, control etc.
I believe in God but have no time for religions.
This person really needs to do a course on people skills.
Poor Andy :( So heartbreaking that people don't understand disability.
I’m so sorry that this has happened to you all, especially for Andy ☹️ he was doing so well with his progress all because of the bell ringing, I just hope that you find another church that’s accommodating and allows Andy to enjoy bell ringing x
OMG why they chucked you out of the church its Andy’s favourite place.
It’s a stupid reason to chucked you out of the church ⛪️
have you tried life church, kings gate or baptist church on new road in Peterborough all have great children groups
Uggggg highest of highs, lowest of lows. I was so so excited for all this stuff and the heartbreak that I felt from it and I live on an entirely different continent. :'( Hope you can figure out another church. Or that someone finds this and reaches out to all of you about a better alternative. Man, heartbroken over here. So frustrating. They seemed so genuinely happy for him to be there too.
A horrible and unfortunate situation, but on the bright side what an absolutely amazing effort Andy has made to take this within his stride and deal with it properly. I think this is something you should be proud of for him, and I’m sure you are. Well done Andy, you are clearly a strong and intelligent boy that is learning to really deal with inconveniences and emotions well.
One thing that made me realize that you (Kev) are a rare cool guy is that your dog is named "Dave." Here in Phoenix, AZ metro area there are a myriad of "bark parks" (dog off-leash parks) that, given our weather, we can visit most every day of the year, with the exception of "excessive heat warning" days in the summer, that regulars get to know each other and in many cases, make long-lasting friendships. ALL of them know how much I hate people choosing the MOST popular names for dogs like Buddy, Abbey, Khloe, Zoe, Tucker, Rosy, Annie, Blue (for every damn pit bull of gray color)..etc. "Dave" is an awesome name for a dog. My dearly departed pup who I just lost after 14 years was named "Bert." Your whole family is unique and that's a good thing.
I thought the hole point of a church is the fact the YOU ARE ALL WASY WELCOME 😂
U should buy Andy some hand bells to ring at home!!!
I am glad in the USA they have so much help with austism and people that have to live with it. Took many years but it's finally here.
There is alot of help for kids but basically nothing for adults. Adults with Autism struggle finding jobs thanks to the stupid interview process that's all about social interaction that we suck at. We could have a 4.0 PHD in a field and the bitch running the HR department still wouldn't hire us because we are "awkward" or "creepy" because we don't follow social rules 100% perfectly. IDK what we need to do but companies need to STOP putting such an emphasis on social skills when most jobs don't need them.
How sad. I hope you’re able to find another bell ringing group for Andy.
Speak to the vicar/ minister and make a complaint
Do we really need to know when Andy needs a poo 😂love Ur vids
Yes lol
OMG that’s awful, how dare him be so rude to you and Andy. In some of your videos of the bells Andy is wearing his different is not broken t-shirt, got half a mind to send them an e-mail with some NAS resources, but will obviously respect your wishes. Andy is a superhero for taking it so well, not sure I could have handled that. I’m so sorry for Andy that he can’t go to that church anymore, seems like some discrimination to me. He loves that church, genuinely upset for him.
OMG this should never happen I thought churches where supposed to except every one love you guys
This is do sad, especially when Andy found something he loved doing. Please don't let ignorance win, do what you can, you are in the right!
So much for churches being a welcoming place for EVERYONE!!
I really love the vids they are so good im a big fan
I've only just seen this video. This person obviously has an issue with Andy since he addressed him directly. I hope you got some legal advice because what this person did was seriously illegal under the terms of the equality act. Dont let it drop Kev because people like this person will enjoy not being confronted about this behavior and think its ok for them to do it again.
It’s such a shame. I loved watching Andy enjoying himself and seeing him try new foods in order to get to the church. I hope you find a new church that does bell ringing!
I loved meeting you at the goose fair too 😁
So sorry you had to endure this. I have had cases when I have cried out of anger and helplessness when my kids have been hurt like that.
Kev you handled this so well! And from what you were saying Andy handled this well as well!! As you said Kev there are plenty of church’s to go to and take Andy!! 😊
They all seemed so nice at the start
Hugs guys I have decided to withhold my words at the moment. Big Hugs Andy!! 💕
Alot of comments saying its funny that the Church isnt accepting.why is this a suprise to anyone. the church has a long history of intolerance. my son has Autism and watching this made me furious. kudos on your level of self control
i am a train spotter and that train was a class 153 1 coach. i know trains well by the way in the UK because i live in the UK.
I’ve had a word with the Man upstairs. He’s not very happy at all.
God will not be happy with that church . They have to have respect and tolerance .
Shows how amazingly tolerant religious people are!
I’m gonna have an atheist church that Andy would love.
I would say that it is more likely that the group felt uncomfortable with Andy and assumed it would be a one off, in the beginning and then tried to think of a way to say “we don’t want him here, he makes us uncomfortable “ and therefore used the camera as an excuse; because they know they’d be back lash towards the church, if they’d been straight with you. They should have spoken to you at the end of the last time, that would have given you time to prepare Andy.
Wow, that is outrageous! I do not understand why that would be such a HUGE issue! I am just surprised it was Andy that had got targeted for making his videos. But I am glad Andy didn't go too far with having a meltdown, clearly it still sounded like he was still pretty upset about it. I wish some people would just be able to understand children and adults who are well...on the Spectrum. Hopefully you all will find another Bell-ringing club that will accept the filming! I really do enjoy those kinds of videos now! It is a real shame though. Still a good vlog though!
Like people in church are like “be kind to people “ but they go and do that .
This is just disgusting and this guy clearly knows nothing about autism. If you had specifically said that you weren't going to upload any of the footage then he should of been accepting of the fact that Andy wanted to film. I have autism and I have to listen to music through headphones in order to process what's happening around me and if I get told I can't do that then I panic and have meltdowns. If this guy really understood the situation then he could have at least bent the rules for Andy's sake. It's not fair that he got stopped from doing something he loves just because he thinks a little bit differently and has his own ways of processing the world. I am so proud of Andy for taking this so well and I wish the best for him.💜💜💜
Sadly most NTs have zero understanding of Autism. We are heavily discriminated against especially in the work place. I mean the whole interview process goes completely against the way our brain works and then the government and corps wonder why our group has an 80% unemployment rate.
Been here since 13k😁😁❤❤💓💓
Telling people not to do something is as bad as saying to a kid “don’t touch the candy”
Wow what a day for u guys
Poor Andy he has autisum. Like me so yeh
Someone should like a police officer should tell then off
I'm a big fan of u guys 🐶❤️💕
I’m crying ,,,, I love you all
You are a amazing father kev keep up the good work 😄
Class 153 1 car super sprinter operated by East midlands trains used to be 2 car class 155s now mostly class 153s are used for extra capasity operated by northern rail east midlands trains and great western railway
That's so Heartbreaking.
Very sad. But I am impressed with how you deal with it
Sending lots of love xxx
It's just sad. I could see the confusion and sadness in your face too. I'm sorry, it shouldn't have been handled like that. Things like that happen too often sometimes.
This is so unfair that this stuff still happens. We are meant to live in a modern society where people are accepted and there should be no issues. I’m so sorry you guys had to go through this. 💛
whats he doin in a church. he obviously does'nt understand the fact that its gods house and God accepts everyone, im sorry this happened 2 u all. especially Andy bless him he doest understand xxx
Stopped going to church cause I learned to judge
Stopped going to church cause I was afraid of being judge
just got a #savekevin add on this video lol
Poor Andy - such a slap in the face for him!
I understand that people have a right to privacy and what not, but under no circumstances should you approach a child the way that he did. They could have easily asked for any videos to be kept private then Andy would still be able have his fun and not be caused any distress.
Oh no silly what’s that guys problem why if he works at a Church you would expect him to understand oh god I’m so sorry that happened to you all Anna Andy and Kevin that happened that’s not fair at all well done Andy for staying so calm I love through Andy’s eyes they are awesome. He is awesome love you Andy All puzzles fit together
Did any of the others react to the situation? Similar issues where I lived concerning a homeless man and the local church not wanting him in a service. Nice to see them practice what they preach.
I hope you Andy and Anna are ok after that. And that you find a new church with bell ringing to go to
Yes accommodate for me! Not the majority!
Those ableist turds! Shame on the church! I am autistic and I have facing nothing but discrimination my whole life. I’ve been single my whole life because of discrimination for being autistic most of my family miss treats me and I have hardly any friends I just hope that when your son grows up he does not face when I am currently going through. As a result of all this discrimination I have become extremely negative and pessimistic which has lead to even more mistreatment
sounds like you were very calm in that situation im not sure i would of been the same lol
I’ve only just watched this tonight. I’m shocked and in utter disbelief!!!
But funnily enough I found out just last weekend that filming in any church actually carries a copyright that belongs to the Church of England. It was my nephews christening and the vicar said (after
We’d filmed it) that there was a charge due to copy right lol
Utter joke!!!!
Andy is doing so well coping with everything that has happened. Hugs to you all x x x x x x
Christianity and religion in general is a joke. Copyright for a Church? I thought the so called Temple of God was above such scummy behavior but I guess not
Ridiculous! Stay strong guys you’re brilliant
I literally think Lucy goes to the same college as me !!!
I'm so sorry for you guys stay strong .💒
@kevinchapmanvlog you wear really cool t-shirts. Where do you get them?
Up the posh
COBBLERS 😂
@@kieranmalpas1980 bad luck
@@rickylee8708I know
Lol
Bottle jobs
In my experience it's always people who say they are religious who have the least tolerance for anyone else. Sad really.
I am so angry, so so angry, it was such a joy watching you all have fun like that, I think you guys are handling this very well, There needs to be a complaint made against this bully! You guys did and said everything right and very respectful towards the church how dare he! Please don't give that ugly man the power to take the videos down they show the joy and happiness in Andy's face , something this one man has taken away! OK I got that out of my system, I'm good to go lol.
Just go and find another church. Ideally with a ground floor ring so Andy can wander around the church as well as go outside. Think about contacting the local guild/society of Bell-ringings and explain your situation. You are giving bell-ringing free publicity and this man decides to kick you out! oh well! Look up cccbr.org.uk
That man is just flipping pathetic! (cleanest way I can say it) it’s okay for him to say he dosnt want u to film it or put it online but he can’t say u have to take it down. He should of said u can’t film anymore but u can still visit. He obviously has something against u or Andy for some reason!
I as a bell ringer am very sorry to hear this. I happened to stumble across this video as there are lots of ringers who use UA-cam to upload videos of their ringing career. You and your wife are fantastic for doing all this for your Son. You would be welcome to visit my tower anytime :)
This is one clear cut reason why I'm pretty much forever going to stick to "home church" Watching services online so I can listen to sermons and music but not have to deal with discrimination and other negative issues.
Sounds like that man was on a power trip and u-p for a confrontation. Fair play to you for handling it so well.
This just makes me so sad. Just sad, sad for you all. Mad at the fact that this kind of thing happens. x
That bloke sounds like a complete jobsworth.
Ahh yess Christianity reverting back to it's old ways of claiming openess but really being ultra exclusive so what if Andy is loud films stuff an sometimes doesn't understand how the world works he's a wonderful kid full of life
Your supposed to be quiet in church but surely they could let it slide/make allowances for Andy's special needs poor andy
Christianity was never opened, according to some of the extremist Christians people with Autism have demons inside them and are punishment for their parents past sin. One Pastor recommend parents pour bleach down their autistic kids ass to "cure" them of said demons. And then Christians wonder why so many people with Autism are Atheists...
I think it's unfortunate to blame a whole church for the actions of one man. The rest of the church is probably still okay with it. People in the comments are painting everyone in a bad light just because of one bad apple.
Nice vid
Sorry you all had to go through that.
What a shame really. 😢😤
That's so bad treating Andy like he's done something wrong!! So you worked him up to eating meat and going to that church now he's going to think oh if I get this meat I'm now going to get thrown out of another church . They don't understand that can really mess up this routine. Sorry but I don't normally get involved but they had a go at someone who don't even understand what's going on and they called them selfs a church more like hell on earth !!!!!
Well how sad that they can’t just ask you not to film anymore !! But I’m a believer of everything happens for a reason ! Why don’t you look into other bell ringing groups and contact them prior to turning up and see if you can find a more welcoming group :) keep up the good work you & Anna are doing :)
Chances are the group are not anything to do with the running of the church Kev most ringers are a club who ask for permission from the church therefore I'd talk to local council regarding the church and get permission from them go in and film blur there faces to make a point. But I am that kind of person
How very holy of them