Dealing with an alcoholic is not actually dealing with the person, it’s dealing “with a shadow of the person.” That is the BEST way I have ever heard that explained. Thank you.
After my grandfather passed away when I was 11, family Christmas was never the same. It took several years before it died completely. Enjoy the Christmases while you can. It can change.
Decode beforehand what you won't tolerate. That made me smile - the year Brexit got voted on (I'm in the UK) my sister and I developed the "Brexit airhorn" for Christmas. We asked people not to discuss it beforehand and any time it came up in conversation, my sister or I would sound the Brexit airhorn. That shut people up pretty quick!
Dear One, when you were a girl you did not have the power to fight back against a master manipulator and predator. To see you now, as a woman, using your strength and power to protect your girls and to step into doing what you can to also protect other children is nothing short of WOW just wow … you ARE strong … step back and listen to this call again and acknowledge the steps you have taken to stand up and protect no matter what … Brave One … thank you for sharing your story today. 💕
Love the advice about the holidays! Thank you! The holidays used to always be anxiety producing for me. I don't like command performances End of story. So what I did with my family was I told them that I'm not going to do holidays anymore. And if they wanted to see me, I'd be much more comfortable to visit and have a cup of coffee with them after the first of the year. It was one of the most successful things I ever did. And.............it turned out that my siblings felt the same way and because I put my plan out there, my brothers and sister kind of did the same thing too. My sister and her husband decided to leave town for the holidays every year. Everyone was much happier! Someone has to have the courage to say "Nope, not doing that anymore."
We walked out of one Christmas. No one was getting along from the get go. It got insulting when someone didn’t want a pic taken posed in whatever way. We packed up and left. The next year we split the group differently and in shorter time blocks.
These are some of the reasons why I love having a personal relationship with Christ. He helps you solve issues differently with the help of the Holy Spirit. Some of these counselors and therapist have issues themselves believe me. My advice for her is first of all forgive your husband and forgive yourself. Learn to love him as a person including all other people and take bitterness from your life. Pray as much as you can. And see how your life will transform
John, Re: Caller #1 May. Why not ask her where the mother of her 2 teenage stepkids is? We don't know the full story of where the kids live. May sounds like a good egg & likely a good stepparent, but her own kids are grown (per her backstory). If teens have a decent mom in the picture, May should be able to set herself free.
I was engaged to a functional alcoholic who pushed alcohol on his special needs adult son on every holiday. Worse still, he allowed him to drive home (20 miles away) after drinking. The poor guy was NOT a good driver without alcohol. I walked out; but I still worry about him every holiday.
Yup. My family def wasn’t affectionate physically so when I get married, it was a huge learning curve trying to get used to my husbands parents always wanting hugs
Here in the UK there is a Butcher who sells Pastry roll with Squirell meat. People love how it tastes. WHY to kill them ? 1. They dont have a natural predator and they are a pest. 2. This animals can chew up a roof and damage a house worse than rats, ask any carpenter he will tell you.
To the wife in Cincinnati Ohio with a husband grieving through alcohol; she needs to see a Woman Coach not a counselor. A woman coach will help you use your feminine gifts to heal your marriage & your dead relationship come back to life. It starts with you; only you can change you. I am here to help.
Feminine gifts? I don’t understand what that means. She can’t heal her marriage on her own especially when her spouse is an addict. Even if he’s sober, she can’t heal her marriage on her own. He has to be a part of the process.
Download Dr. John Delony’s Anxiety Relief Checklist here: www.johndelony.com/
Dealing with an alcoholic is not actually dealing with the person, it’s dealing “with a shadow of the person.” That is the BEST way I have ever heard that explained. Thank you.
Alanon
After my grandfather passed away when I was 11, family Christmas was never the same. It took several years before it died completely. Enjoy the Christmases while you can. It can change.
Decode beforehand what you won't tolerate. That made me smile - the year Brexit got voted on (I'm in the UK) my sister and I developed the "Brexit airhorn" for Christmas. We asked people not to discuss it beforehand and any time it came up in conversation, my sister or I would sound the Brexit airhorn. That shut people up pretty quick!
Totally love that!!😅😅😅
Dear One, when you were a girl you did not have the power to fight back against a master manipulator and predator. To see you now, as a woman, using your strength and power to protect your girls and to step into doing what you can to also protect other children is nothing short of WOW just wow … you ARE strong … step back and listen to this call again and acknowledge the steps you have taken to stand up and protect no matter what … Brave One … thank you for sharing your story today. 💕
Love the advice about the holidays! Thank you! The holidays used to always be anxiety producing for me. I don't like command performances End of story. So what I did with my family was I told them that I'm not going to do holidays anymore. And if they wanted to see me, I'd be much more comfortable to visit and have a cup of coffee with them after the first of the year. It was one of the most successful things I ever did. And.............it turned out that my siblings felt the same way and because I put my plan out there, my brothers and sister kind of did the same thing too. My sister and her husband decided to leave town for the holidays every year. Everyone was much happier! Someone has to have the courage to say "Nope, not doing that anymore."
Wise advice.
Al Anon has helped me so much in understanding there is nothing you can do to fix the alcoholic. It has to be his decision to get help
💯
Oh my god she needs to report her father - he’s probably abusing other kids. So sorry this happened to her what a horrible thing to deal with
Good counselors are angels, man.
Absolute earth angels 👼 ❤
REAL phone call hour. Wow!
God bless you John for all the work that you are doing. My life has been enriched through your videos. I praise God for your life and your work.
How do you set a boundary without holding onto resentment and badmouthing the person in your own mind?
I’d like to know this too!
Oh gosh, that! Same...
Write them a letter maybe? 🤷♀️ ❤
We walked out of one Christmas. No one was getting along from the get go. It got insulting when someone didn’t want a pic taken posed in whatever way. We packed up and left. The next year we split the group differently and in shorter time blocks.
Love your show Dr John Meloney and your wonderful helpful tips,and your Podcasts and your books .love your tips you give out
These are some of the reasons why I love having a personal relationship with Christ. He helps you solve issues differently with the help of the Holy Spirit. Some of these counselors and therapist have issues themselves believe me.
My advice for her is first of all forgive your husband and forgive yourself. Learn to love him as a person including all other people and take bitterness from your life. Pray as much as you can. And see how your life will transform
John, Re: Caller #1 May. Why not ask her where the mother of her 2 teenage stepkids is? We don't know the full story of where the kids live. May sounds like a good egg & likely a good stepparent, but her own kids are grown (per her backstory). If teens have a decent mom in the picture, May should be able to set herself free.
that squirrel aint gonna forgive ya, man.
Dr John just got way cooler in my book knowing that he shoots and eats squirrels 😅
The squirrel story!🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
I was engaged to a functional alcoholic who pushed alcohol on his special needs adult son on every holiday. Worse still, he allowed him to drive home (20 miles away) after drinking. The poor guy was NOT a good driver without alcohol. I walked out; but I still worry about him every holiday.
@Bok Choy Hugs for the heartfelt reply. ♥️
I saw my brother-in-law touch the front of his son's pajamas. I didn't know what to do. It made me sick. This happened years ago.
.....do other families not hug and kiss each other ?
Yeah... I grew up with neither my mom’s or dad’s family being affectionate, and now my boyfriends family is very affectionate. I’m very bad at it
My family rarely does. My wife’s family is very affectionate by comparison. It was weird at first but I’m getting used to it.
Yup. My family def wasn’t affectionate physically so when I get married, it was a huge learning curve trying to get used to my husbands parents always wanting hugs
@@sammyb861 Enjoy the affection in your new family. We all deserve it
@@justinbowman2126 You deserve it. I hope you are getting used to it and enjoying it
If my uncle is not making offensive jokes about other ethnicity I don't want to be there
John, what does squirrel taste like? 🤔
Probably like Chicken lol; I know rabbit does. Growing up, we had that alot. The good ol South.
Mild. No gamey taste.
Squirrel 🐿️ taste delicious especially if you are hungry. 🤗
Where I live they are hawk food.
@@hwright9608 yeah same here Dave!
How crazy is it that this same theory applies now 😂😂😂
🛑 addiction of privacy invasion please stop by having no consent thanks you have a good live
We hunt squirrels too 😂
HOW DO I WATCH LIVE??
People eat squirrels? 😳🥴
Yuk!!!!!
Country people do. 😂
Don't raise your kids in an alcoholic home.
She needs to go to Al-Anon too.
Barbecued squirrel !
Why do you kill and eat squirrels, man? It's disgusting 🤢
Here in the UK there is a Butcher who sells Pastry roll with Squirell meat. People love how it tastes.
WHY to kill them ? 1. They dont have a natural predator and they are a pest.
2. This animals can chew up a roof and damage a house worse than rats, ask any carpenter he will tell you.
Al-Anon.
To the wife in Cincinnati Ohio with a husband grieving through alcohol; she needs to see a Woman Coach not a counselor. A woman coach will help you use your feminine gifts to heal your marriage & your dead relationship come back to life. It starts with you; only you can change you. I am here to help.
It takes the effort of both people to heal a marriage.
Feminine gifts? I don’t understand what that means. She can’t heal her marriage on her own especially when her spouse is an addict. Even if he’s sober, she can’t heal her marriage on her own. He has to be a part of the process.
I hope she can at least heal herself and care for her stepchildren
In a case like this the wife has to take care of herself, first. Don't stay with someone who won't seek help. That is an abusive situation.
Her marriage cannot be healed with a full-blown alcoholic
The squirrel and our family don't forgive you. Gross.
Hey John!!! What about him!?!?!???
This show is so protective on woman… I’m done listening to you Delony…. BYE FELISHA