In summary: 1. Not picking up a phone call when you do not feel like talking/having a conversation 2. Responding to a text message not at the earliest convenience but at your earliest convenience - Do not pressure yourself to respond right away 3. Practicing speaking to yourself kindly especially through uncomfortable moments 4. Waking up early to ground yourself 5. Resist fighting to be right especially if it drains your energy- "I understand that individuals think differently" 6. Choosing your battles - Not everything is worth your focus/energy 7. Peacefully stepping away especially when you feel your energy is being drained 8. Adding Rest and Relaxation to your routine
Thank you for your community service. I love it when someone summarizes the "Nuts-n-bolts" and serves it up to the community. It's a great act of service for us self-mastery sojourners all around the world.
I just lost my mom because of kidney failure and i am really going through the grieving process but i can tell people still expect me to available and accessible to give them advice wise counsel etc . i am now making myself more of a priority to heal and become whole again.
I’m praying for you to heal properly & persevere throughout this tough time in your life 🙏❤️ take your time to go through this challenging time & it the people around you cannot understand that forget about them & leave them where they stand ✌🏼 I lost my auntie recently & I’m hurting as well & I feel as though people around me have not been understanding at all & I need to reevaluate my circle & take my power back ... we are stronger than we think sometimes & sometimes we don’t want to be mean by creating boundaries or cutting people out who mean us no good by feeling it’s the wrong thing to do or having to explain why we are not able to be there for them ... 9/10 when we need THEM they are nowhere to be found so it’s a process that we have to go through to be able to grow through & WE WILL get through the storm ☔️ AMEN 🙏
@@macdicaprio3094 thank you for the encouragement. You be strong also. In time God heals all wounds. We must allow God to put all pieces back together so our hearts can be healed💝
THe most basic way to enforce a boundary is to refuse to participate in a problematic behavior. If an unreputable relative tries to borrow money, you do not lend it. If a friend starts shouting at you, you stop the conversation and exit the room. And while it's simple, it's the part where a lot of people struggle. "Oh, I really don't wanna lend John money, but he's family" "Oh, I don't wanna listen to his shouting, but I can't leave the conversation". And the answer to that is "Of course you can. Just say no. period".
I always keep my phone on silent or "do not disturb" (a setting that only allows a select list of contacts through). I tell my family, friends, and business associates that I do not answer calls from numbers not in my contact list. If a person calls from a different phone or needs me immediately, they can text me their concern or leave a message saying so. That allows me to decide if that need is urgent for me as well. If so, I'll call them back right away. Keeping guard of my attention, energy level, emotions, and decision capacity is important to me. Thank you for sharing this wonderful checklist of options.
I was always happy when the daughter of my husband send me a message. But I realised I'm always the one who is giving and there's no reciprocity. I felt I also gave myself empty. So, I realised it and I'm protecting now my energy.
I use that function where you can write out different responses in text. I have one that says "I am indisposed at the moment. Please call back in 1 hour" or two hours, or 15 minutes or whatever. Or "just call back later"
I hv develop a technique to say no to ppl and the response is bad. The hatred hahaha but I'm actually enjoying the part of being hated.ppl will take advantage if u always laughter or friendly with them
People have it backwards They will answer the phone when in the presence of s9meone they are supposed to be hanging out with and it's not an emergency.
12:04 Avoiding or Self Protection. I have to say if the person is that toxic in that you have tried everything, intentionally avoiding a beligerent person is self protection. Pretty good video tho.
I always let people know that I will get back to them when I am free. I do believe that we must show people respect. I do what your friend does. I leave my phone at home when I shop.
I think you saved my life - I’m not even joking. I think boundaries are so natural as a child, but I think as we get older (esp as women) we are taught that our needs don’t matter and we have to be responsible for the reactions of others + meeting their expectations to survive. This work is a deep breath of fresh air and a sigh out of non sense and people pleasing. Thank you 🙏 Please keep posting here!!!
This is good! I have experienced in a work place norm, with relationships with family norm, and or a church cultural norm that is unhealthy… can you speak to building a new work space, sense of family, and or friends etc… thanks
Yes and thank you most times when I give to much energy to things that drains I end up feeling like - I can't change that thing or person - so why am I giving so much?? I am praying for peace - daily.
I'm so glad you're on UA-cam. There are a portion of us that only use UA-cam. I wouldn't have known who you were had you not made that transition. I would have missed out on your wealth of wisdom. I appreciate the work you do. Thank you :]
Exactly what I needed to hear and practice. I used to feel bad or guilty for not being available to everyone. Now I am more aware of my energy, how my light shines, and how to protect myself better. Thank you, Nedra!
I love love love this video! I just grabbed your boundary book from the library & realized another woman was there to get it too.. now I see the hype! Thank you!
Thank you for being on UA-cam, as it's the ONLY media source I use (other than Facebook). Your down to earth sensibility and approach resonates so much with me and I learn so much from your interviews and videos and derive comfort and approaches to use in my life. Thank you, Nedra.
I set my boundaries firm, clearly so that there is no doubt about it. But does that mean that I'm not in connection with the other, that my heart isn't open?
I am hoping someone will reply I have been in relationship for around 6 years my partner likes to play what I call mind games give me mixed messages this get me down I have mentioned it and I basically I miss understanding him but we have broken up over this what I want to ask is playing mind games ect a good reason to end a relationship
This was so insightful and wise in your content. Thank you so much. Real Wisdom D Carnegie how to win friends. He Taught that arguing both people loose. Will not build a relationship.
.....How long would you leave a text before you answer it......one day...two days three days four days....I sent a text to a so called friend...she answered after four days...I was inviting her for coffee...?.
Yeah sorry, but if someone isn’t going to get back to my text within 24 hours then I’m not playing the these are my boundaries game. Everyone is on their phone these days. Sure stuff happens in life and we get busy, but at the very least if you are busy and 24 hours has elapsed, then the person could write back and go I’m kinda busy right now, will get back to you soon. Do these people actually expect to have friends when they keep them waiting that long? By the end of 1 day, let alone 4 days, I’m onto something else. Besides which, if someone gets back to me days later, I’m already done with their rudeness. Of course there are exceptions and life does happen, but,,,,a true friend would take a moment to send a message of some sort so as not to keep you hanging on.
In summary:
1. Not picking up a phone call when you do not feel like talking/having a conversation
2. Responding to a text message not at the earliest convenience but at your earliest convenience - Do not pressure yourself to respond right away
3. Practicing speaking to yourself kindly especially through uncomfortable moments
4. Waking up early to ground yourself
5. Resist fighting to be right especially if it drains your energy- "I understand that individuals think differently"
6. Choosing your battles - Not everything is worth your focus/energy
7. Peacefully stepping away especially when you feel your energy is being drained
8. Adding Rest and Relaxation to your routine
Thank you sis! 💛
Thank you for your community service. I love it when someone summarizes the "Nuts-n-bolts" and serves it up to the community.
It's a great act of service for us self-mastery sojourners all around the world.
I just lost my mom because of kidney failure and i am really going through the grieving process but i can tell people still expect me to available and accessible to give them advice wise counsel etc . i am now making myself more of a priority to heal and become whole again.
I’m praying for you to heal properly & persevere throughout this tough time in your life 🙏❤️ take your time to go through this challenging time & it the people around you cannot understand that forget about them & leave them where they stand ✌🏼 I lost my auntie recently & I’m hurting as well & I feel as though people around me have not been understanding at all & I need to reevaluate my circle & take my power back ... we are stronger than we think sometimes & sometimes we don’t want to be mean by creating boundaries or cutting people out who mean us no good by feeling it’s the wrong thing to do or having to explain why we are not able to be there for them ... 9/10 when we need THEM they are nowhere to be found so it’s a process that we have to go through to be able to grow through & WE WILL get through the storm ☔️ AMEN 🙏
@@macdicaprio3094 thank you for the encouragement. You be strong also. In time God heals all wounds. We must allow God to put all pieces back together so our hearts can be healed💝
Sorry for your loss,I pray you find peace and joy 🤍🤍💕
Hugs love...take your time and may God comfort you in this low time
Sorry to hear about your loss. Much love and respect ❣️
THe most basic way to enforce a boundary is to refuse to participate in a problematic behavior. If an unreputable relative tries to borrow money, you do not lend it. If a friend starts shouting at you, you stop the conversation and exit the room. And while it's simple, it's the part where a lot of people struggle. "Oh, I really don't wanna lend John money, but he's family" "Oh, I don't wanna listen to his shouting, but I can't leave the conversation". And the answer to that is "Of course you can. Just say no. period".
I always keep my phone on silent or "do not disturb" (a setting that only allows a select list of contacts through). I tell my family, friends, and business associates that I do not answer calls from numbers not in my contact list. If a person calls from a different phone or needs me immediately, they can text me their concern or leave a message saying so. That allows me to decide if that need is urgent for me as well. If so, I'll call them back right away. Keeping guard of my attention, energy level, emotions, and decision capacity is important to me. Thank you for sharing this wonderful checklist of options.
I was always happy when the daughter of my husband send me a message. But I realised I'm always the one who is giving and there's no reciprocity. I felt I also gave myself empty. So, I realised it and I'm protecting now my energy.
I remember Not having a cell phone and bring just fine. We spoke at the end of a day on the house phone when you it became available.
I use that function where you can write out different responses in text. I have one that says "I am indisposed at the moment. Please call back in 1 hour" or two hours, or 15 minutes or whatever. Or "just call back later"
Saying No is very powerful! Thank you for the tips tools and techniques!
I hv develop a technique to say no to ppl and the response is bad. The hatred hahaha but I'm actually enjoying the part of being hated.ppl will take advantage if u always laughter or friendly with them
People have it backwards
They will answer the phone when in the presence of s9meone they are supposed to be hanging out with and it's not an emergency.
I sa w you on women of impact & needed to find your website personally.. for I felt this is what's needed for me.. SUBSCRIBED!!!!!! 😊
12:04 Avoiding or Self Protection. I have to say if the person is that toxic in that you have tried everything, intentionally avoiding a beligerent person is self protection. Pretty good video tho.
Agreed. Once the collaboration for both of us convo doesn't work. Zigging while they zag is the next step.
I enjoyed each of your words..thank you
I always let people know that I will get back to them when I am free. I do believe that we must show people respect.
I do what your friend does. I leave my phone at home when I shop.
I needed to hear that. Protecting my energy is my goal.. Thank you !
I think you saved my life - I’m not even joking. I think boundaries are so natural as a child, but I think as we get older (esp as women) we are taught that our needs don’t matter and we have to be responsible for the reactions of others + meeting their expectations to survive. This work is a deep breath of fresh air and a sigh out of non sense and people pleasing. Thank you 🙏 Please keep posting here!!!
This is good! I have experienced in a work place norm, with relationships with family norm, and or a church cultural norm that is unhealthy… can you speak to building a new work space, sense of family, and or friends etc… thanks
Yes and thank you most times when I give to much energy to things that drains I end up feeling like - I can't change that thing or person - so why am I giving so much?? I am praying for peace - daily.
I'm so glad you're on UA-cam. There are a portion of us that only use UA-cam. I wouldn't have known who you were had you not made that transition. I would have missed out on your wealth of wisdom. I appreciate the work you do. Thank you :]
This is life changing for me 😭😭😭
Saw someone post u on IG so I had to come hear for myself. Speaking factz! ✊🏾
I did the same thing!
i definitely have times where i check texts and respond to keep myself from getting distracted or losing my momentum on stuff. ❤❤❤ ty Nedra!
I'll be switching my phone off when I go shopping from now on.
Exactly what I needed to hear and practice. I used to feel bad or guilty for not being available to everyone. Now I am more aware of my energy, how my light shines, and how to protect myself better. Thank you, Nedra!
I set my boundaries but I always get silent treatment afterwards
Thank you. I find your insights Reasonable, logical, mature, strong, free of "the swamp of chaos".
Thank you 🙏🏾
I so grateful to have found you.
Nedra you are amazing; truly gifted to this profession. Thank you for all your content and valuable insight ❤️🙏🏽
I love love love this video! I just
grabbed your boundary book from the library & realized another woman was there to get it too.. now I see the hype! Thank you!
YES!! Thank you. This is so helpful. I was feeling guilty for practicing the same. THANK YOU!!
Thank you for being on UA-cam, as it's the ONLY media source I use (other than Facebook). Your down to earth sensibility and approach resonates so much with me and I learn so much from your interviews and videos and derive comfort and approaches to use in my life. Thank you, Nedra.
awesome video if valuable truths thanks
Thanks Nedra ... Gold xx
thank you, love your perspective on things...
Your last information was very helpful. Thank you.
Awesome 👏🏽
Thank you so much for this video! beautiful! I also love your accent a lot :) Reminds me of my Godmother, who lives in a different country...
Thank you!! Thank you so much!
Thank you for your tips and tools !😀
Thank you so much for sharing. Pls keep making these videos if you can!
Thank you for your advice. I find it very useful!
Thank you for your wisdom.
Keep.up the good work...looking forward to more
Thank you so much!!! You are a Queen!!
wow, that is so great and helpful. Thank you so much Nedra
Thank you Nedra!
Great video!!
Best perfect video very useful n help ful thank u
Thank you very much, I will be following you and your advice.Please stay safe and keep up the great work!!
I apply this respons when I'm ready
I love this! I need this. Thank you!
I set my boundaries firm, clearly so that there is no doubt about it. But does that mean that I'm not in connection with the other, that my heart isn't open?
GOD bless you Ms
Sometimes I have to block the person that I am avoiding:-)
I am hoping someone will reply I have been in relationship for around 6 years my partner likes to play what I call mind games give me mixed messages this get me down I have mentioned it and I basically I miss understanding him but we have broken up over this what I want to ask is playing mind games ect a good reason to end a relationship
Leave
Mind games are a form of manipulation. For sure a major red flag.
Thanks for sharing 🙏
This was so insightful and wise in your content. Thank you so much. Real Wisdom
D Carnegie how to win friends. He Taught that arguing both people loose. Will not build
a relationship.
Great ❤️👍🏽
You're so beautiful :D Thanks for this video, it was very enlightening
Thank you for sharing valuable content! You're appreciated!
Love love love your nails!
Glad I watched this
Hello from Brazil. Love you blog Pinterest . Great vídeo. Thanks
.....How long would you leave a text before you answer it......one day...two days three days four days....I sent a text to a so called friend...she answered after four days...I was inviting her for coffee...?.
Yeah sorry, but if someone isn’t going to get back to my text within 24 hours then I’m not playing the these are my boundaries game. Everyone is on their phone these days. Sure stuff happens in life and we get busy, but at the very least if you are busy and 24 hours has elapsed, then the person could write back and go I’m kinda busy right now, will get back to you soon. Do these people actually expect to have friends when they keep them waiting that long? By the end of 1 day, let alone 4 days, I’m onto something else. Besides which, if someone gets back to me days later, I’m already done with their rudeness. Of course there are exceptions and life does happen, but,,,,a true friend would take a moment to send a message of some sort so as not to keep you hanging on.
🙏❤️
Describing me to the T
I don’t want to answer to people
❤
!! This!!