What Is the Dumbest Thing You've Ever Heard Someone Say?

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  • @RodrickMarsMoon
    @RodrickMarsMoon Рік тому +37

    "People will only respect you if you do what they want, whenever they want you to!"
    I received this advice very seriously from someone. I'm pretty sure this was a projection, I kinda feel bad for the person who said this to me.

    • @foreverseethe
      @foreverseethe Рік тому +5

      Hi, friend. You have to re-word the quote, your comment or both with correct grammar and punctuation where appropriate because what you wrote is completely garbled. Sorry.

    • @RodrickMarsMoon
      @RodrickMarsMoon Рік тому +1

      @@foreverseethe I just reread it, you're right; I corrected it, now 😅🤗. Haha'.
      Thanks for letting me know ^^.

    • @ShudowWolf
      @ShudowWolf 10 місяців тому +1

      Sad part is some people are like that, so possible they're complaining about someone in particular.

  • @oldmanfromoc7684
    @oldmanfromoc7684 Рік тому +127

    The no ice one reminded me of my 50 year old sister saw me putting bottles of water in the freezer, she told me l couldn't freeze water. Wow l explained the whole ice making process!

    • @Khaleesi_Of_Kittens
      @Khaleesi_Of_Kittens Рік тому +3

      How?

    • @Rebecca-ex2ge
      @Rebecca-ex2ge Рік тому +6

      I feel like someone played an alcohol in a water bottle prank.

    • @tonyblake7569
      @tonyblake7569 Рік тому +13

      I'd want her to explain what she meant. Obviously you're posting here so I doubt it but I'd wonder if she was talking about inside a bottle. Yes it freezes but I'd think she's worried about it expanding, popping the cap, and potentially leaking, or even cracking the bottle.

    • @somethingsomething404
      @somethingsomething404 Рік тому +3

      @@tonyblake7569 yeah that makes more sense

    • @karlzaunbrecher8241
      @karlzaunbrecher8241 11 місяців тому

      In a screwy way she was sort of right. As the ice melted, the volume would be reduced slightly since ice takes up more space than water. Even so, the change in volume would be so small it would probably be hard to measure

  • @rosalindsongsmith3670
    @rosalindsongsmith3670 Рік тому +17

    I know that this probably won’t make it onto a video or anything, but I definitely have several good ones. Firstly, I can’t tell you how many people seem to assume that if you’re blind you’re also deaf. I know that because I’m blind and have had several people assume that I know and use sign language. I’ve also had several people assume that I can’t comment on the Internet because I can’t see so obviously I can’t right. Fun fact. Technology is so advanced now that I’m able to type and either my phone or my laptop will say everything I’m typing out loud. There was one time when my friend and I were shopping at a grocery store. I don’t have any vision, and she’s partially blind. She happened to have her newborn baby with her. Well at one point, this woman came up to us and said something to the effect of, “You are so lucky to have that precious baby with you. He just grabbed your finger and his grip kept you from falling! You have a seeing eye baby! “I wouldn’t have believed this except that I happen to be standing there at the time. It was obvious sadly that the woman who said it was dead serious. Unrelated to the blindness thing, but one time I was at a restaurant and heard some lady tell either a waiter or waitress not to put any ice in the water because she didn’t anyone extra calories because of the ice. It was so ridiculous that my friends and I just started laughing hysterically.

  • @maxrobertson2834
    @maxrobertson2834 Рік тому +60

    I’m from Alaska and the crap people ask you is insane. I mostly get asked (by children AND adults) if I have ever seen a wild penguin, then they argue with me when I say they don’t live in Alaska

    • @SupermarketSweep777
      @SupermarketSweep777 Рік тому +3

      Ever see a wild puffin then?

    • @frosthoe
      @frosthoe Рік тому +13

      Well fact is Alaska has alot of wetlands and you know what that means...Alaskan Snow Gators!

    • @maxrobertson2834
      @maxrobertson2834 Рік тому +3

      @@SupermarketSweep777 unfortunately no, I wish I did though

    • @indridcold8433
      @indridcold8433 Рік тому +5

      It is more a reflection on the public education system than with the people that ask. I speak three languages. I was asked how to say something in French. I gave the honest answer and the woman got hateful about it and told me I was lying. I just said, "If you know the answer, why did you ask?" She then started getting abusive because she did not know French. Granted, she was an, arrogant, hateful, loud, self-entitled, worthless woman, but her public education was what failed her.

    • @4FYTfa8EjYHNXjChe8xs7xmC5pNEtz
      @4FYTfa8EjYHNXjChe8xs7xmC5pNEtz 9 місяців тому

      I spent a few weeks in Juneau. The main thing that mystified me was that a lot of people walked around all night long, screaming for no apparent reason. It was hell of weird.

  • @kimberlygabaldon3260
    @kimberlygabaldon3260 Рік тому +73

    I took a friend to an endoscopy appointment. She had to fast, beforehand, and couldn't eat anything after 10:00, the night before her morning appointment.
    I picked her up and took her in. Sat in the waiting room for about 45 min. Then they called me back.
    She told me that she would have to come back and do it again, because they found food in her stomach. I told her that I thought she had fasted. She said, "I did! I didn't eat anything after 10:00 last night, and then I just had eggs and toast for breakfast." I about died. She was a nurse!!!
    The average untrained medical patient understands those instructions. Forrest Gump would have understood those instructions!

    • @Kayenne54
      @Kayenne54 Рік тому +10

      I'm wondering how the "nurse" became qualified. Is 49% considered a pass mark now? Though to be fair, I've had a few "heated discussions" with nursing staff relating to my daughter's Type I diabetes issues. Staff thought it was fine to give her insulin at 5 pm and let her wait over an hour for food. Despite me giving them an ad hoc lecture on the effects of insulin and their various types on the human body. As in, no food for an hour, and she'll be your newest coma patient.

    • @Wendy_O._Koopa
      @Wendy_O._Koopa Рік тому +5

      Maybe she's a Gremlin? You know, the "don't feed them after midnight" rule that makes no sense? Well, breakfast is _before_ midnight.

    • @Khaleesi_Of_Kittens
      @Khaleesi_Of_Kittens Рік тому +3

      Why are you friends with this person?

    • @kimberlygabaldon3260
      @kimberlygabaldon3260 Рік тому +1

      @@Khaleesi_Of_Kittens I no longer am. Haven't spoken to her in years, (for other reasons).

    • @indridcold8433
      @indridcold8433 Рік тому

      Her nursing degree was likely from Devry or ITT Tech. It is terrifying that these idiots get positions that they have no business having because they paid for a piece of paper.

  • @darkknight5541
    @darkknight5541 Рік тому +60

    I once had a friend who didn't know what sex was. Seriously, we were watching a TV Show with a sex scene, and he just had the most confused look on his face as he asked "what is happening?" We all laughed, thinking he was joking. He was not.
    Edit: Look, I'm not going to claim know everything about his home life, but I can confirm that he was very sheltered. There are a few other stories, and this is only the one that came to mind.

    • @Derpysaur
      @Derpysaur Рік тому +7

      Sounds like your friend was probably too young to be watching the show you were watching.

    • @darkknight5541
      @darkknight5541 Рік тому +16

      @@Derpysaur He was in his 20's.

    • @mr.protagonist5639
      @mr.protagonist5639 Рік тому +8

      @@darkknight5541 yeah that's weird.

    • @darkknight5541
      @darkknight5541 Рік тому +18

      @@mr.protagonist5639 To be fair, it wasn't so much that he was stupid as it was that his parents didn't really explain certain things to him. Luckily, we were able to change that, for better or worse.

    • @girlscanbedrummers5804
      @girlscanbedrummers5804 Рік тому +15

      @@darkknight5541 He honestly sounds very sheltered poor guy.

  • @ninomitchell2039
    @ninomitchell2039 Рік тому +50

    Whoever thinks deer change into moose/elk at a certain elevation are nuts. Deer evolve into elk at level 16 and elk to moose at 32, just like pokemon.

    • @spectra1096
      @spectra1096 Рік тому +1

      😂😂😂

    • @sivanhedoesstuff
      @sivanhedoesstuff 6 місяців тому +4

      Unless you're in Canada, then deer evolve into caribou

    • @ninomitchell2039
      @ninomitchell2039 6 місяців тому

      @@sivanhedoesstuff or maybe Russia.

    • @ninomitchell2039
      @ninomitchell2039 6 місяців тому

      @@sivanhedoesstuff didn't think about that though.

    • @somekidnamedsomething
      @somekidnamedsomething 6 місяців тому +3

      Yeah people are stupid, I raised my now-level-59 elk singlehandedly, and watched it evolve both times. Get educated people

  • @jackcarter5101
    @jackcarter5101 Рік тому +9

    About 5 years ago, I saw my friend and his sister walking down the street outside my house, and we got chatting. It was a very hot day, so I invited them in for a cold drink. When I got the ice cube tray out to ice the drinks, my friend's sister said "How do you cut the ice into such smooth cubes to fit in the tray?". Thinking she was joking, I laughed. But she was dead serious. So I said, in disbelief that I was actually having to explain this to a grown adult, "You pour liquid water into the tray and then freeze it". She looked at me like I was speaking an alien language. 10 minutes of agonised explanation later, the truth finally comes out. This woman, in her mid 20s, has absolutely no idea that ice is, in fact, frozen water!

  • @j.tgrooms
    @j.tgrooms Рік тому +17

    You can't fix stupid-Ron White

    • @notsmii7y
      @notsmii7y Рік тому

      You can’t fix stupid nor can you reason or argue with it

  • @myufostory689
    @myufostory689 Рік тому +10

    I'm an amateur astronomer. When I was growing up, I was looking at Mars through my telescope with my mom, and I commented about wondering what the stars would look like from Mars.
    She commented, "You mean, Mars has stars too?"

    • @Chuckf66
      @Chuckf66 6 місяців тому

      That's kind of sweet.

  • @stanford-nf4jk
    @stanford-nf4jk Рік тому +18

    In ninth grade health class a guy said to the teacher, “Why do abortions even exist? If women don’t want to get pregnant, all they have to do is pee out the sperm!” 🤦🏻‍♂️

    • @kiddextersgodlyadventure129
      @kiddextersgodlyadventure129 Рік тому +3

      Yeah, I’m gonna excuse that one. A 15 year old boy who doesn’t understand how female plumbing works. I honestly think that’s not too bad

    • @stanford-nf4jk
      @stanford-nf4jk Рік тому +7

      That doesn’t get him off the hook. We had ALREADY gone over both male and female genitalia, in particular the reproductive organs. He was either wasting class time by asking inane questions or he completely missed the fact that while some spermatozoa may get into the urethra, peeing would NOT flush out the majority of seminal fluid out of the vagina, which is BELOW the urethra. In the end, it was STILL a stupid thing to say.

    • @GipsyDangerfan
      @GipsyDangerfan Рік тому +1

      ​@@stanford-nf4jk The only way I could see the guy being right while being wrong was if he met some chick who was into ur***ral play.

  • @codybailey855
    @codybailey855 Рік тому +14

    Pulled a guy over for running a bright light tbar on the highway. During the stop, he said he needed it because his high beams weren't bright enough. I told him to get new bulbs. Then dude straight up said it was probably because one of the lights were low on fluid. I started laughing, thinking he was joking. Dude was serious. He then pointed out the condensation on the inside of one of his headlights. I td him what it was, and that he needed new headlights. That, or a restoration kit. Freaking killed me.

    • @michaelbujaki2462
      @michaelbujaki2462 Рік тому +2

      It's too bad you can't suspend someone's licence for being too stupid.
      I met a trucker who was hit by a minivan that was trying to get under his trailer. Her response to the officer: "Well Chevy Chase made it fit and he had a Christmas tree on the roof."

  • @ladymorrigan5950
    @ladymorrigan5950 Рік тому +10

    I had to explain to a grown woman and her husband that in fact not all chickens lay eggs. It’s only the hens that lay eggs and roosters do not. They seemed sheepishly unsure & glad of the explanation.

  • @keels829
    @keels829 Рік тому +7

    13:16 I was forced to eat a Belgian waffle and a steak with only a spork awhile back and can confirm (for a different reason) that they are the devil's utensil

    • @keels829
      @keels829 Рік тому +1

      The reason I was forced was bc I had to get a to-go box from my university's dining complex (they're for if we don't have time to eat in the DC and have to eat during a class) but didn't realize they only were putting flimsy plastic sporks-- not even a plastic knife or anything-- in the boxes until some time after I had gotten my food and right before I started eating in class. My poor prof thought I was laughing at him but no, I was just sleep deprived and laughing at my attempt to eat a steak with a frickin spork. I mean technically it was a Salisbury steak which is somewhat softer than a normal steak but still. It tasted decent tho so it wasn't too bad (I also think too many ppl complained about the sporks bc they did end up changing back to the normal 3pc plasticware sets)

  • @xxscribbledragonxx9744
    @xxscribbledragonxx9744 Рік тому +31

    We were learning about consent at the ripe age of 16 and some kid said "what if they say no but you really really want it," he wasnt joking

    • @maltal8352
      @maltal8352 Рік тому +4

      Doubting the validity of this story .

    • @WASDLeftClick
      @WASDLeftClick Рік тому +24

      I believe it. Tons of people don’t develop empathy or a sense of right and wrong until they’re adults, sometimes even never.

    • @xxscribbledragonxx9744
      @xxscribbledragonxx9744 Рік тому +1

      @@maltal8352 well then you're dumb dude idk

    • @xxscribbledragonxx9744
      @xxscribbledragonxx9744 Рік тому +11

      @@WASDLeftClick yeah, he was a super gross dude all around, called one of our mutual friend a slur to her face, harassed multiple people on and offline, but then sucked up to the teachers to never get in trouble for anything. dude was a prick

    • @emilymiddleditch4584
      @emilymiddleditch4584 Рік тому +6

      @@maltal8352 how? Are you that sheltered where this kind of thing doesn’t seem real?

  • @chasefrost1401
    @chasefrost1401 Рік тому +4

    4:26
    Barbarianna "It's the dinosaur age"
    Kung Fury "That explains the laser raptors"

  • @georgelancaster2989
    @georgelancaster2989 Рік тому +3

    I'd say the odds of a building falling apart is 100% given enough time.

  • @LovelyCinccino
    @LovelyCinccino Рік тому +6

    ..Ohh the Cards Against Humanity story brings back that traumatizing memory of when I played with my parents and their friends..And of course, someone made the mistake of looking up what ‘Two Girls, One Cup’ was..

    • @MariaMartinez-researcher
      @MariaMartinez-researcher Рік тому +1

      And, of course, I had to look it up too. There's a Wikipedia article on the subject.

    • @w.reidripley1968
      @w.reidripley1968 9 місяців тому

      Me Three. I expect it's entertaining. [Edit: well, nope.]
      Unless you're bi, you might not want to to look up 'grilled cheese situation.' (It's nothing like String Cheese Incident)

  • @kalistasanders975
    @kalistasanders975 Рік тому +5

    I was playing pool with this guy one day and I was telling him that I was from Ohio. And he asked me where that was in Illinois. Yeah stopped talking to him over that. Can't have a conversation with someone (in their late 20's) that doesn't know Ohio is a state 🤦

  • @alexanderwelshwelsh9931
    @alexanderwelshwelsh9931 Рік тому +4

    A kid in my year 10 biology class asked if cows were predators
    I say that forgetting the teacher of that class the previous year said she knew someone that had a bathtub that could cure cancer but couldnt use it because they were being threatened by the government of the isle of wight
    So thatd probably be the dumbest thing to come out of that school

  • @eccentricwallflower
    @eccentricwallflower Рік тому +9

    The potato and cow ones seriously concern me. It's amazing how many people don't know basic agriculture or where their food comes from. I mean... there's still people out there who think that all chicken eggs carry a chick fetus and that eating the eggs unalives it. As someone who is born and raised in a small town with a large farming community, it seriously concerns me how a lot of people in city areas have no idea how it works or where their food comes from

    • @grisheexi7219
      @grisheexi7219 Рік тому +3

      When I was five I thought that you could plant an egg into the ground and it would grow into a chicken lol

  • @JonPITBZN
    @JonPITBZN Рік тому +5

    "Something with an A and looks German."
    I was not able to guess just from that. I know what Auschwitz is but that wasn't enough of a hint for me to guess it.

  • @4FYTfa8EjYHNXjChe8xs7xmC5pNEtz

    My mom thought telephone calls and other audio signals move at the speed of sound. One of my friends in high school thought "silhouette" was pronounced "silo-hoot."

    • @w.reidripley1968
      @w.reidripley1968 9 місяців тому +1

      Yeah, you can sure be misLED to say MYzled for years... Er.

  • @rochellethundercloud346
    @rochellethundercloud346 Рік тому +26

    Was told, seriously, I don't know oppression.
    I'm native American.
    Trail
    Of
    Tears.
    Same person dared me to use a racist slur at rapper fifty cent.
    Uh,how about no.

    • @foreverseethe
      @foreverseethe Рік тому +6

      Well, your people's history doesn't mean you personally know what oppression is for other groups today in any context. Uighurs, Palestinians, or Blacks in America.

    • @zacktheslayer6564
      @zacktheslayer6564 Рік тому +1

      @foreverseethe doesn't matter, they don't know oppression either. Everyone knows racism, and almost all races experience racism in this day and age, but rarely anyone truly becomes oppressed, since oppression isn't being attacked by one person, it's being limited by everyone. Being put in an unfair living environment.

    • @RazorsRide
      @RazorsRide Рік тому +2

      @@zacktheslayer6564 Uighurs and Palestinians don't know oppresion? :')

  • @booksteer7057
    @booksteer7057 7 місяців тому +1

    My brother and I lost my car in the parking lot at Disney World. We'd been on our feet for 14 hours and were so wrecked we could barely walk. A kind security guard stayed 40 minutes past the end of his shift to get us a ride to my car. (For some reason, the trams had stopped running.) The two employees only had room for me in the golf cart, so when they dropped me off at the car, I said, "Would you mind driving back and picking up my brother so that he doesn't have to walk here?" They waited around until I realized how stupid my request was. I got out an apologized to them for being so daft. 😂

  • @dkhasar
    @dkhasar Рік тому +6

    metal sporks should be a thing

  • @SiegeTF
    @SiegeTF Рік тому +4

    Just as dinosaur fossils probably inspired the dragon I bet giant sloth and cave bear (etc) fossils inspired trolls, orcs, etc.

    • @w.reidripley1968
      @w.reidripley1968 9 місяців тому

      Mastodon skulls. The ancient Greeks had never seen an elephant... and figured them for the skulls of Cyclops.
      Same-same unicorn horns and narwhals.

  • @logger22
    @logger22 5 місяців тому +1

    I saw a video where someone traveled to post-U.S. Afghanistan and said it’s peaceful and the Taliban were friendly contrary to what the world thinks. But the best part was he didn’t ask any women or anyone who wasn’t a Muslim about the current state of the country

  • @exsecror78
    @exsecror78 7 місяців тому +1

    In my high school days, I was chatting on the phone with my then GF (mid 1990’s) and I guess her brother walked in and had pizza and wings. He Asked if she wanted some buffalo wings and she straight up asked “are they actual wings from buffalos?” This was way before the whole Jessica Simpson incident. I laughed at her and she hung up on me.

  • @Kakmanmartinez666
    @Kakmanmartinez666 Рік тому +3

    My mother in law was pissed at me and my fiance for some stupid reason and said "no doesn't always mean no". Um I'm pretty sure it does... It's because we were going out on our anniversary date and she wanted to include herself. So we just asked if she wanted to come and she told us no. So we just went out to eat and she was blowing up his phone the whole time screaming at him.

  • @Icanseeyouthroughthescreen
    @Icanseeyouthroughthescreen Рік тому +1

    "No! Don't put on that suncream! That causes cancer!" I seriously thought she was joking but she kept insisting and I realised I had an idiot for a friend

    • @spectra1096
      @spectra1096 Рік тому +1

      I mean theres alot of gnarly chemicals that can cause it thru overuse so shes not wrong totally...
      A to Z of Death song😂

  • @samplautz5586
    @samplautz5586 Рік тому +1

    I have blown on ice cream multiple times in order to “cool it off”. It usually happens when im tired and not thinking, I feel pain in my mouth because of how cold the ice cream is, but it’s the same pain when something is hot, and me being tired my brain thinks, “I gotta cool this off it’s too hot”

  • @DblOSmith
    @DblOSmith Рік тому +2

    A friend told me that if a cop radar guns you for speed, if you slow down, it ruins it and he can't get a reading. He died on that hill believing that.

    • @rautamiekka
      @rautamiekka Рік тому

      If one believes that, I bet their mind will be quite literally blown when they got caught.

    • @DblOSmith
      @DblOSmith Рік тому +3

      @@rautamiekka Given his mentality, he's probably in jail for a list of other things, speeding being a lesser/included charge.

    • @rautamiekka
      @rautamiekka Рік тому

      @@DblOSmith Yeah.

  • @philyjfry
    @philyjfry Рік тому +1

    1:50 lmao I imagined after that like someone tapping a tree for syrup but mashed potatoes comes out

  • @natthecat3602
    @natthecat3602 Рік тому +1

    I went to a predominately white, Catholic-private school. I’m Filipino and my friend is Vietnamese. A girl from our grade asked my friend, in front of all of us, if she “spoke Asian”. Same girl has also previously asked if Africa was a country or a continent.

  • @loserwithabong3354
    @loserwithabong3354 Рік тому +8

    Not said directly towards me, but overheard
    A girl in my friends science class was arguing with the teacher about how using brail is offensive and how deaf people aren’t disabled. Like she fully believed this. And was getting so mad she was crying and everyone was just sitting there silently. Lmfaooo

    • @HannahSiemer
      @HannahSiemer 10 місяців тому +2

      Good thing she had never met me, I would’ve had a bone to pick with her. I learned braille at the age of 10, and I’m fairly fluent, I don’t understand how that can be offensive? Lots of hearing can also lead to loss of communication capability, and you don’t think that involves some form of disability? I’m assuming you’re not the one saying this, but person you overheard would’ve gotten that for me,

  • @Beaty0307
    @Beaty0307 Рік тому +1

    The one about the dog not talking hahahahahahahahahahahaha

  • @kimhohlmayer7018
    @kimhohlmayer7018 Рік тому +1

    Renault cars were sold in conjunction with Chrysler back in the 1980s. I can assure everybody that it had seatbelts. Sadly there was a defect that caused the engines to constantly overheat. Loved that little car and its great gas mileage but the hot engine issue finally made me sell it. They came through six months to a year after that with a recall noticed my husband passed on to the guy who bought it. The model was called Alliance because it was made in cooperation with Chrysler. Wonderful car except for that. Could not get it fixed no matter what we tried.

  • @olingecko
    @olingecko Рік тому +1

    I spend a lot of time doing white water, and the raft comment was very accurate.

  • @TheMBAttack
    @TheMBAttack Рік тому +1

    For the one about the ice cubes I understand where the person is coming from. The water that the ice is made from is often different and dirtier to the filtered water served to customers. The person just wants to have all of the filtered water.

    • @TimeSurfer206
      @TimeSurfer206 11 місяців тому +2

      And the machine probably hasn't been cleaned since it was made.

  • @drunkenrobot7061
    @drunkenrobot7061 Рік тому +1

    12:05
    I initially went into an Education major when I first went to college as part of a double-major. Dropped it after the first semester because while I love working with kids, I can't stand when they can't listen to directions and do their own thing... which, them being kids, they do all the time.

    • @foreverseethe
      @foreverseethe Рік тому +3

      Then you don't love working with kids. Which Is fine, btw

    • @drunkenrobot7061
      @drunkenrobot7061 Рік тому +1

      @@foreverseethe eh, fair enough.

  • @EllpaFox47
    @EllpaFox47 6 місяців тому +1

    13:25 this kind of makes a tiny bit of sense if you consider gendered languages like German
    I know in German, the word for fork uses feminine endings/articles and the word for spoon uses masculine endings/articles

  • @max_meliani
    @max_meliani Рік тому +2

    14:00 Step monster was the perfect typo

  • @rachel.0352
    @rachel.0352 6 місяців тому

    In my history class in my sophomore year of high school, we watched the movie The Patriot. The one with Mel Gibson. There was a scene where a few dogs were running through a field or something and this one girl a few rows away from me asked, with genuine curiosity, "Did they even have dogs back then?"

  • @ladyfatassii901
    @ladyfatassii901 Рік тому +1

    Regarding the latex gloves, try working in Healthcare. There are soooo many around

  • @knightwing5169
    @knightwing5169 3 місяці тому

    When I was roughly 6 years old, a substitute teacher told the class that "household" is not a compound word "because houses can't hold anything".

  • @escaramujo
    @escaramujo Рік тому +1

    The one about cows!
    I was doing army training with a lot of youngsters from all over the country, in the middle of a territory that lets cows to roam freely eating grass instead of having them inside eating milled-dead-cow-bones-and-corn-stuff.
    So this dude behind me asks: What are those?
    Me: Those what? The cows?
    Him: Cows? No, those huge beasts eating grass.
    Me: Dude, those are cows.
    Him: Nope. Cows are waaay smaller, like dogs.
    Me: There can be smaller cows, but those are regular Iberian cows. If you go up north you'll see Northwestern cows, which are a third bigger than these one.
    Him: Don't pull my leg! Cows are small, haven't you seen them in the pictures of milk bricks?
    *and then all the surrounding privates to be (who where obviously listening) turned or ducked to look at him like he was a crazy person. He abandoned a week after that and everybody was relieved xDD.

    • @spectra1096
      @spectra1096 Рік тому

      Just wait till he sees all different kinds of goats 😂

  • @pearldragonz
    @pearldragonz Рік тому +3

    I had a buddy who was really smart about electronics but a bit short on brain cells for everything else. When he was car shopping he pulled more than a few absolute oblivious to reality moments. I will mention the two worst ones.
    #1. One of the first car lots he went to had a really nice turbocharged Chrysler and it was right in his price range. After he figured out how a turbo worked (had to show him you have to go faster than 30 mph to really feel the turbo) he decided he wanted the car.
    When we got back to the dealership the salesman started drawing up paperwork while my buddy circled the car in happiness. That is until he discovered what appeared to be a bullet hole. He pointed it out to the salesman and said he no longer wanted the car.
    Why? Because it might have been involved in a gang land shooting and he didn't want a random gang member murdering him when they saw the car. We were in small town nowhere Oregon where only the cattle and sheep run in gangs.
    #2 was when he actually bought a car. He drove to Portland and went to one of those rip off big city lots that do their own financing. The first thing he says is he needs a car today and can't go home without one. They probably grinned widely before they raked him over the coals. He ended up paying $12,000 on about a $8,000 car. Monthly payments were $425 and after adding in the interest rate he actually paid closer $15,000.

  • @frosthoe
    @frosthoe Рік тому

    Younger me working as carpenter on job site. Generator breaker popped off, dude sees knot in cord and insists that the knot is stopping the "Lectricity".
    So we all stop and watch...Unknots cord and is mystified it doesn't work, I flip the breaker on generator and go back to work.
    He was later fired for trying to cut without a square ...using a chainsaw....hand stroking nails, when we had every tool imaginable available.

  • @Cat_chan420
    @Cat_chan420 6 місяців тому

    The Trump business man statement reminded me of something. A man (read as stalker of womenat a local Wal-Mart) came up to me and said that I had to vote for Trump. Why? "Because he's such a good talker." He couldn't say what the talking points were or a cohesive idea on why he was better than Hillary or even Trumps platform (the wall). This was just before the Access Hollywood bus stuff came out.
    My response is the same as any where my job is customer service, "I really don't like discussing politics; however I tend to vote for people based on what they're platform is and if I agree on it. I'll listen to him and think about it. That wasn't good enough for him and he started arguing with me about it. I repeated myself, smiled and wish him a good night.

  • @badgerbadger-badger-Poppy
    @badgerbadger-badger-Poppy Рік тому +1

    For the one about pregnancy lasting 18 months, that’s kind of a stretch. But horses can carry a pregnancy anywhere from 10 months to a little over a year. The average gestation is about 11 months

  • @jimdob6528
    @jimdob6528 Рік тому +13

    Literally everyone who thinks their feelings are more important than facts and medical science.

    • @maltal8352
      @maltal8352 Рік тому +1

      🫲🏻THANK YOU ! 🫱🏻

    • @rileysjonger4192
      @rileysjonger4192 Рік тому +2

      This has offended all the right-wingers and radical/TERF feminists, lmaoo!

    • @w.reidripley1968
      @w.reidripley1968 9 місяців тому +1

      ​@@rileysjonger4192That... demonstrated the exact same phenomenon.

    • @rileysjonger4192
      @rileysjonger4192 9 місяців тому

      @@w.reidripley1968 ?

    • @Da_bear-ij9gm
      @Da_bear-ij9gm 3 місяці тому

      @@rileysjonger4192girl 😂 what’s it’s like to be 100% wrong? Might as well talk about how climate change activists hate recycling

  • @Vipera217
    @Vipera217 Рік тому +3

    My friend told me that dinosaurs still exist to this day and I agreed.. of course there are distant relatives like birds.. but she meant rhinos .. because she thought rhinos' full name is Rhinosaurus.
    I miss her

  • @juniorsutereo
    @juniorsutereo Рік тому

    My top #1 Would be: "Is the Space real"?

  • @thelegendofzoey
    @thelegendofzoey Рік тому

    this had me giggling like a child😭😂

  • @vitricewashington6510
    @vitricewashington6510 Рік тому

    If I said water with no ice... It's only because I'm cold as hell. XD

  • @got_gnome_cursed
    @got_gnome_cursed 4 місяці тому

    1:16 well i feel like ice can affect water but not much it barely does

  • @rileysjonger4192
    @rileysjonger4192 Рік тому

    12:41 This is the greatest thing ever.

  • @fizzy1550
    @fizzy1550 8 місяців тому

    I lost a new friend to something super stupid I said before, and when I realized I said it, I understand why they stopped talking to me, lmfao!!!
    I spelled, "breath", when I meant to say, "breathe", and she corrected me. She was totally right, but then my dumb--s was all, "oh, no, it's breath. It must be different in Australia."
    I couldn't believe what I had said and swore to myself I'd never correct anyone ever again, lmao!!
    I feel so friggin' stupid and wish I could go back in time and slap myself.

  • @shanelawrence7438
    @shanelawrence7438 11 місяців тому

    "Why Don't we add a bell to the remote for when it gets lost"

  • @michaelmceachin1511
    @michaelmceachin1511 6 місяців тому

    Someone told me that it is illegal to drive without your high beams on at night. They asked me when i was driving why i was not using my high beams at night.

  • @Kaminkaese
    @Kaminkaese Рік тому +2

    "The big-bang killed the dinosaurs"
    That was the moment i lost all interest in her...

    • @w.reidripley1968
      @w.reidripley1968 9 місяців тому

      Bad grades in prehistory.
      Though the Dinosaur 🦕 Killer was pretty loud...

  • @terrageode7592
    @terrageode7592 Рік тому

    This is actually something that a friend told me about, but some of her friends were convinced that tacos and burritos were the same thing, and did not believe her. To be fair, it is a relatively small distinction, and the people who thought this were from the Mid West. Still they did not believe the Texan who grew up knowing the distinction. (Tacos are folded over their filling with the ends open while burritos are wrapped in such a way that both ends are closed.)
    Sorry for the rant it’s just the story about meatless chili con carne just reminded me of that.

    • @TimeSurfer206
      @TimeSurfer206 11 місяців тому

      "Chili with meat."
      It's amusing that in AmeriKKKa we need to make the distinction that our chili HAS meat.
      No One else in this world adds BEANS to Chili but us damn Wanker Yankers, anyway.
      And this old Horn Tooter Boomer knows what a traditional Burrito really is:
      Last night's leftovers wrapped in a TorTilly.

    • @w.reidripley1968
      @w.reidripley1968 9 місяців тому

      On a friendlier note, is the Tortilly hurled at you by a tortillerista?
      Should we institute the practice, Toward More Picturesque Speech?

  • @soulrotsystem
    @soulrotsystem Рік тому

    Reminds me of when someone told me " there has to be 8 planets in a solar stystem for it to actually be one " jesus that was stupid. But they werent joking.

  • @soapstar77
    @soapstar77 Рік тому

    The old lady from the first one is from Drake and Josh LMAOOOO

  • @rosschatterton709
    @rosschatterton709 Місяць тому

    Yep, some people are so stupid you have to laugh.

  • @Kirkaig
    @Kirkaig Рік тому

    7:15 maybe he was talking about the series

  • @tallguywindowcleaning
    @tallguywindowcleaning Рік тому +1

    I dated a girl that thought islands float.

    • @GipsyDangerfan
      @GipsyDangerfan Рік тому

      I mean, depending on when this happened, she would be right if she played Subnautica with mods.

  • @valenciageode25
    @valenciageode25 11 днів тому

    12:02 If you hate your job, why not do something else?

  • @beefsupreme4671
    @beefsupreme4671 6 місяців тому

    It’s funny when people think dinosaurs were not real but those same people will not believe when you tell them that there is original tissue in the fossils.
    Don’t call someone else stupid if you can’t accept the truth yourself.

  • @jimbo5635
    @jimbo5635 Місяць тому

    I worked at McDonald's. Imagine your flex is you lie about working at McDonald's.

  • @Kellywormtongue
    @Kellywormtongue Рік тому

    Here’s something stupid; my friend’s girlfriend said her favourite food is ketchup. …Ketchup.

  • @Benjamin1986980
    @Benjamin1986980 Рік тому +1

    Just adding that polar bears are grizzlies. They're close enough genetically that really they are different breeds, not different species

    • @missharry5727
      @missharry5727 Рік тому +1

      They can interbreed. The result is called either a grolar bear or a pizzly bear.

    • @GipsyDangerfan
      @GipsyDangerfan Рік тому +1

      ​@@missharry5727 Either way, the end result is HORRIFYING.

    • @w.reidripley1968
      @w.reidripley1968 9 місяців тому

      "Pizzly Bear" sounds p@rnographic too.

  • @night-of-fright-is-no-delight
    @night-of-fright-is-no-delight Рік тому +1

    Yeah

  • @elliottryan13
    @elliottryan13 5 місяців тому

    The person staying in the north Georgia (USA) mountains in summer, along the manager to NO SHIT, to "Lower the wildlfe noise, " because it's "Too loud."

  • @NickThorbjørnsen2207
    @NickThorbjørnsen2207 Рік тому +1

    I was once sleeping with someone who legitimately thought that they were still burning witches in the 1960s and that cars didn't exist back then.
    And that my good friends is why it never advanced beyond casual sex.

  • @austinfowler2707
    @austinfowler2707 5 місяців тому

    Stpry 1: oh boy my 15 minutes of fame!!!!!
    Old lady: ill bring this criminal to justice if its the last thing ill do!!!!!!

  • @CodenamePrince
    @CodenamePrince Рік тому

    Girl in senior year said she didn't know engineering required math

  • @trippy.elephant
    @trippy.elephant 3 місяці тому

    if you shake your phone the background wiggles

  • @greergarlick4675
    @greergarlick4675 Рік тому +2

    I'm going to out myself for bei g dumb... but I didn't know there was two holes for women "pee hole/sex hole" for an embarrassingly long time either 😳🤡

    • @Void_TheDemon
      @Void_TheDemon Рік тому +3

      There's a LOT of people who don't know that if it makes you feel better lol

    • @Wendy_O._Koopa
      @Wendy_O._Koopa Рік тому

      Are you a guy or a girl, though? Guys I 120% understand, our education system is horrible, and it's an obviously awkward subject. Girls I gotta question a little more, do you never see the little hole, or do you completely miss the larger hole? Are you afraid to wipe yourself because it will turn you into a lesbian? Ordinarily, this wouldn't cross my mind, but there are guys out there who won't wipe their own ass for this very reason. -Yes, they are afraid of becoming lesbians. /s-

    • @foreverseethe
      @foreverseethe Рік тому +2

      Well, men use the same canal for both, it's natural to think women do too.

  • @jeagerzbomb9924
    @jeagerzbomb9924 Рік тому +1

    About the 2nd story, did we know the same girl??? She did not believe in dinos but believed witches were real.

    • @rileysjonger4192
      @rileysjonger4192 Рік тому +1

      Technically speaking, witches are real. Unless you're referring to the Hollywood stereotype and not the religious/spiritual participants, then...

    • @lrajic8281
      @lrajic8281 Рік тому +2

      The first rule in Witch Club: don't talk about Witch Club.

    • @w.reidripley1968
      @w.reidripley1968 9 місяців тому

      And now we know where those witches got that much cauldron broth from. Mmm --- chicken-ish.

  • @BurghFinsFan
    @BurghFinsFan Рік тому

    My cousin thought that the prostate was in the balls.

  • @DeadHouseMouse
    @DeadHouseMouse Рік тому

    To be fair to that last girl, they are RIGHT next to each other

  • @stevecurran5206
    @stevecurran5206 Рік тому

    look up the video of the girl who says she wants her pizza in 8 slices, not 12 because....she couldn't eat 12 slices.

    • @w.reidripley1968
      @w.reidripley1968 9 місяців тому

      Quote Investigator says it was not Yogi Berra or Dizzy Dean --- despite appearances --- it ain't so, Joe.
      They DID trace the quip back to c. 1965. Sportswriters and Joe Garagiola getting froggy.

  • @ursulajoni15
    @ursulajoni15 5 місяців тому

    Yeah several of these were definitely jokes that the op missed

  • @Khaleesi_Of_Kittens
    @Khaleesi_Of_Kittens Рік тому +2

    Jesus Christ, people. 😪

  • @Dman9fp
    @Dman9fp Рік тому

    10:47 I actually took a holocaust studies elective course in high school here in FL in 08 or 09. Honestly hate to admit- wouldnt be surprised if its no longer offered (I know for sure a.p. african american studies were axed, & DeSantis keeps banning books in schools for whatever reason)

    • @w.reidripley1968
      @w.reidripley1968 9 місяців тому

      Actually, he seems of the view that high school books should be in high school libraries.
      Now you, meantime, have a handy dandy list of books to go buy for your own library. Nobody else's; just yours. So you stay informed. And/Or titillated.

  • @brialapoint2608
    @brialapoint2608 Рік тому

    The orc and dragons thing. i hope nobody convinces that guy hes wrong im one of those people that believes that thousands to millions of years ago this planet was vastly different than it is now

  • @KATTALNUVA3
    @KATTALNUVA3 2 місяці тому

    This is why I can’t see humanity as a valid evolutionary species.

  • @What_am_i-yn3ig
    @What_am_i-yn3ig 6 місяців тому

    One time I saw one of those videos like “I WILL PIN THE LONGEST COMMENT”
    So I put a very long comment, but then someone replied saying “no this is the longest comment” and then a whole fight started because I said that was the longest reply

  • @planetbob6703
    @planetbob6703 Рік тому

    Watched a video about the dumbest questions they’ve been asked by Americans. Among them were asking people from 1. world countries wether they had electricity, fridges or internet.
    *And above all* Germans wether they had cars...
    The inventors of cars... known for exporting cars...

  • @artfuldodger7838
    @artfuldodger7838 Рік тому +2

    Lot of this sounds something from extreme right wingers.

  • @williamsmith6213
    @williamsmith6213 Рік тому

    18:36 This will be true for me always. I was born in 2000

  • @mztweety1374
    @mztweety1374 Рік тому +2

    Oooof! Yeah sex education in the u.s. is absolutely dismal.. trust me I learned everything about sex from listening Prince in the 80s. Can y'all imagine kids running to the internet after hearing Darling Nikki for the first time?? Big fun!😊

    • @w.reidripley1968
      @w.reidripley1968 9 місяців тому

      Afternoon Delight.
      And somebody with no capacity for irony whatever will name an ice cream sundae that. A really big one. That takes all afternoon.

  • @albertangeloro5832
    @albertangeloro5832 Рік тому +5

    when discussing the 1st Amendment and free speech, a lawyer named Woody who supports free speech angrily said "I'm for shutting up those who want to shut people up."

    • @YouveBeenMegged
      @YouveBeenMegged Рік тому +5

      Someone: Do you support free speech?
      Woody: Well yes but actually no

    • @w.reidripley1968
      @w.reidripley1968 9 місяців тому +1

      ...Prejudiced against bigots, too.
      Life is never without its little absurdities.

  • @MandieKearns-Moore
    @MandieKearns-Moore 5 місяців тому

    No!!!! grizzly bears and polar bears cannot breed with each other they never ever encounter each other in the wild there's no such thing as a pizzly and the thing everybody are calling that is actually called a spirit bear and it's a genetic abnormality from a black bear they are neither grizzly nor polar

  • @54GodzillaFan
    @54GodzillaFan Рік тому +3

    A few days ago I was watching UHF and my mom come into my room to ask me to turn the volume down because apperently she finds Weird Al hollering out the side of his mouth like Stallone offensive. I literally laughed in her face. She's said a lot of stupid stuff over the years but that takes the cake.

  • @erickpoorbaugh6728
    @erickpoorbaugh6728 Рік тому

    2:30 That guy doesn't sound dumb---it sounds more like he was molested as a child and had some trauma.

  • @caterinadelgalles8783
    @caterinadelgalles8783 7 місяців тому

    Everything that comes out of Bree Chavez of Moscow's mouth.

  • @marycanary86
    @marycanary86 Рік тому

    people are really out there thinking women have cloacas...