I suggest the following as a mnemonic: The word RESCUE RE cognise - I’m being triggered S low down - Pause C ompassion - For my suffering U Represent U - get on your own side E xecute a Plan
Owning and accepting parts of me that are tradditionally not ok in a totally non judgemental calm mind has been very helpful it is like havijg a calm friend or mirror. I realised I was always told anger is not ok. I just accept that I rouse to anger easily, if I block it, it causes intense bodily pain wherever I hold it, but if I accept I am angry and an acceptable situation has come along for me to be seen as angry it comes out. So I just see it as swells of the ocean but observed from the beach. Not good or bad but just what is. The swell so quickly dissipates and there is no negative angry thought spiral at someone, as I just totally owned it.
Thank you for pointing out the complicated dynamics at play when in the mental health, mindfulness, and social justice realms someone points a finger and says, "I feel hurt, therefore you hurt me." I've needed to hear/see this addressed for some time. /\
I suggest the word "hell" will trigger a lot of people in one or another way. In american speaking it is probably inflationary used, but in other societys it is a hard word and it is a word, which can do wounds and let feel wounds.
does this apply to trauma that is triggered and a real strong angry reaction. for eq. some soup boiled over in microwave and made a mess and it brought up rage in me....later it reminded me of sexual abuse......from my childhood....I was heavy emotionally and used tapping to release grief and a host of other emotions.....felt lighter after doing that....but I could not control my initial reaction and was yelling and infuriated....please give me some advice
The advice is to breathe deeply name your emotion Explain your need to take some time to feel your feelings alone even though it might feel scary for the soup spiller and you are sorry to walk out Remember or list 3 things you are blessed with or grateful for (a microwave, soup and soap are 3 that you might list) Decide what you need Imagine what the soup spiller needs. Return when you’re ready to express your need in a way that is authentic AND kind (i have the need to use the microwave to heat up my tea so i need it to be cleaned in the next 15 minutes. Does that work for you?) If it’s a very young child: (i need you to help mom clean the microwave now so that i can use it.) Then find some humor and laugh together about a time you once made a food mess. Empathize with the offender through humor and your own imperfection Tell them how you did or didn’t clean but that you now know cleaning is the responsibility of the person who made the mess with help if its needed. Breathe laugh and then thank the person for cleaning or their part in cleaning Ask how they feel.
My advice is go to therapy to heal your trauma, the advice given here is useful for daily situations without such strong causes and reactions. I speak from experience
Jesus wrote in the sand, when he was urged to give an answer . Rude Pharisee are hard in speaking and that is nothing for sensitive persons. I think rude, more direct persons will allways trigger sensitiv persons per se.
Rick. I just watched this clip. My suggestion for the four letter words is "Buddhist Also Has Fire'. This is a direct translation from a Chinese proverb which almost everyone knows. It fits into your teaching perfectly. Buddhist has all the virtues of taking pause and look within, etc and at the end he will also be direct and will not let the fools get away so easily. I am going through the same situation in my life now and I feel so happy to watch your teaching on this. Thank you!
Thank you for offering the teaching. I have summarised the 5 steps into something that I could remember and they are called the 3R's (Reset, Resource, Reintegrate). Reset integrates Step 1 (notice you were trigered) and Steps 2 (Slow, remind yourself not to respond immediately) Resource refers to gathering all resources available such as Step 3 (compassion), Step 4 (muscular on your own side objectively) Reintegrate gather resources and turn into Step 5 (plan) and take action Reset integrates Step 1 (notice you were trigered) and Steps 2 (Slow, remind yourself not to respond immediately) Hopefully that idea was helpful :-)
Trigger warning for lady who travels 4 hours round trip to mums, step outside the house and breath in nature. Spend time just breathing. When shes mmean to you, tell her you love her, might make her think.
I also find this “muscular” response a mismatch with the topic of triggers. Hardly any of my triggers are in need of a vigorous response. They are more pained and disabling. It feels like they need support, love, and soothing.
I loved the reminder of connecting the personal to the political in a critical way. Thank you for your teachings , I appreciate this capacity of connecting Buda teachings with critical political thinking, loving it!!!
I use your book Resilient in my classes and students love it, your writing is so authentic and wise. Before that I used Buddhas Brain. Thank you for your extraordinary work!!
I suggest the following as a mnemonic:
The word RESCUE
RE cognise - I’m being triggered
S low down - Pause
C ompassion - For my suffering
U Represent U - get on your own side
E xecute a Plan
Well done. Quite brilliant.
Thank you. Very helpful. I listen to this when I am overwhelmed and it helps so much. You are so kind and you have helped me so much. Thank you!
Owning and accepting parts of me that are tradditionally not ok in a totally non judgemental calm mind has been very helpful it is like havijg a calm friend or mirror. I realised I was always told anger is not ok. I just accept that I rouse to anger easily, if I block it, it causes intense bodily pain wherever I hold it, but if I accept I am angry and an acceptable situation has come along for me to be seen as angry it comes out. So I just see it as swells of the ocean but observed from the beach. Not good or bad but just what is. The swell so quickly dissipates and there is no negative angry thought spiral at someone, as I just totally owned it.
Rick your work has always helped me so much in my lifetime! Thank you for sharing your wisdom and tools so generously 🙏
TRIP - Triggered, Relax (slow down), I -take care myself, Plan.
Thank you for pointing out the complicated dynamics at play when in the mental health, mindfulness, and social justice realms someone points a finger and says, "I feel hurt, therefore you hurt me." I've needed to hear/see this addressed for some time. /\
I love when Rick says “succinctly, quick question” … enter listener monologue 😂🥴
S.T.O.P. 🛑 - Stop, Take a Breath, Observe, Plan or Proceed
The spainards love your meditation courses? Your advice is very important & helpful, your tips on pausing really help ❤
I suggest the word "hell" will trigger a lot of people in one or another way. In american speaking it is probably inflationary used, but in other societys it is a hard word and it is a word, which can do wounds and let feel wounds.
Thanks very healing to talk about these things.🙂
This is wonderful thank you so much🤍
As always, thank you so much.
APES: awareness, patience, empathy, strength.
🙏
shame, sacred, self, strength......
does this apply to trauma that is triggered and a real strong angry reaction. for eq. some soup boiled over in microwave and made a mess and it brought up rage in me....later it reminded me of sexual abuse......from my childhood....I was heavy emotionally and used tapping to release grief and a host of other emotions.....felt lighter after doing that....but I could not control my initial reaction and was yelling and infuriated....please give me some advice
The advice is to breathe deeply
name your emotion
Explain your need to take some time to feel your feelings alone even though it might feel scary for the soup spiller and you are sorry to walk out
Remember or list 3 things you are blessed with or grateful for (a microwave, soup and soap are 3 that you might list)
Decide what you need
Imagine what the soup spiller needs.
Return when you’re ready to express your need in a way that is authentic AND kind (i have the need to use the microwave to heat up my tea so i need it to be cleaned in the next 15 minutes. Does that work for you?)
If it’s a very young child: (i need you to help mom clean the microwave now so that i can use it.)
Then find some humor and laugh together about a time you once made a food mess. Empathize with the offender through humor and your own imperfection
Tell them how you did or didn’t clean but that you now know cleaning is the responsibility of the person who made the mess with help if its needed.
Breathe laugh and then thank the person for cleaning or their part in cleaning
Ask how they feel.
My advice is go to therapy to heal your trauma, the advice given here is useful for daily situations without such strong causes and reactions. I speak from experience
Jesus wrote in the sand, when he was urged to give an answer . Rude Pharisee are hard in speaking and that is nothing for sensitive persons. I think rude, more direct persons will allways trigger sensitiv persons per se.
All the time narcissistic Ex
This video is triggering me. 😅
Rick. I just watched this clip. My suggestion for the four letter words is "Buddhist Also Has Fire'. This is a direct translation from a Chinese proverb which almost everyone knows. It fits into your teaching perfectly. Buddhist has all the virtues of taking pause and look within, etc and at the end he will also be direct and will not let the fools get away so easily. I am going through the same situation in my life now and I feel so happy to watch your teaching on this. Thank you!
Thank you for offering the teaching.
I have summarised the 5 steps into something that I could remember and they are called the 3R's (Reset, Resource, Reintegrate).
Reset integrates Step 1 (notice you were trigered) and Steps 2 (Slow, remind yourself not to respond immediately)
Resource refers to gathering all resources available such as Step 3 (compassion), Step 4 (muscular on your own side objectively)
Reintegrate gather resources and turn into Step 5 (plan) and take action
Reset integrates Step 1 (notice you were trigered) and Steps 2 (Slow, remind yourself not to respond immediately)
Hopefully that idea was helpful :-)
Love this
You are a beautiful human being, whom I appreciate very much.
❤❤❤❤
Trigger warning for lady who travels 4 hours round trip to mums, step outside the house and breath in nature. Spend time just breathing. When shes mmean to you, tell her you love her, might make her think.
I also find this “muscular” response a mismatch with the topic of triggers. Hardly any of my triggers are in need of a vigorous response. They are more pained and disabling. It feels like they need support, love, and soothing.
I loved the reminder of connecting the personal to the political in a critical way. Thank you for your teachings , I appreciate this capacity of connecting Buda teachings with critical political thinking, loving it!!!
I use your book Resilient in my classes and students love it, your writing is so authentic and wise. Before that I used Buddhas Brain. Thank you for your extraordinary work!!
Thank you once again 🙂
shame - name, sacred - pause, self-compassion, stabilize-self-inner-strength-self-respect
What is this word 'muscketer' he keeps using? Does he mean muscular?
He did say muscular