+psycoslegecy I did pirate it before actually playing it (Because I am Satan) But if I remember correctly it is only for pirated copies, I don't think its appeared once since I purchased it
+Catastrogue Game Dev Tycoon is actually a fairly good game, it has a score of 96% on Steam, so i guess it's objectively a good game. Certainly worth the money.
Very few people have ever seriously used Source for a game other than Valve, the Stanley Parable and other games what ever I don't care creator, and some french company that made a game with electricity in it or something. It's also more complicated than Unity in a lot of ways and doesn't really give you, like, any advantages at all anymore. Hell, the fact that the game was Source is what made me realize Beginner's Guide wasn't even vaguely real about halfway through or wherever the cafe was.
Mattpoppybros I'm not sure if they gave any reasoning behind the choice but yeah, in their development diaries they stated multiple times that it brought multiple obstacles. Frankly I'd be interested in seeing how Valve manages Source2, it'd be nice for them to make it more convenient to use
"release half-life 3" lol. you know whats sad is that when half-life 3 is release it will probably end up like duke nukem forever given how amazingly over-hyped it is.
I love how this game tried to avoid infringing on any kind of trade mark by called the "E3" the "G3", but it then uses Gabe Newel's name a likeness without his permission.
Just so you know, when this was on greenlight it was the most voted game by Steam users at the time. It just goes to show that you can get any turd on Steam as long as it is "just for the lolz". This is it, this what gamers want in 2015, we get what we deserve...
It sounds like Calypso from Twisted Metal, gave us our wish, but the wish we didn't want. Those voters wanted a joke game/simulator of Gabe Newell, and that's what you get upon this playthrough... (slowly clapping) *congratulations* voters...
The transition out of Early Access note must've read something along the lines of: "Experiment to take money from suckers a great success - now to move it to a grander scale"
i'd like to see a John Carmack simulator focusing on keyboards all day, going through macworld with a strut, all that reclusive programmer's programmer action and finally shooting off to mars in a rocket ....on UnrealEngine4.....
I like how when Jim said "just my friendly reminder of the day" we saw Gabe's smiling face just for a second. Also did anybody else notice that one part of his armor that kept glitching out. I personally couldn't stop looking at it. >.>
Another one of those games that were probably a lot more funny as a concept, or a one off joke picture rather than an actual game. Because it turns out when you make it a real game, it outstays it's welcome after about 30 seconds.
the arm's still broken, the the back of the player character model still clips through its armor, and they still haven't found the "smooth shading" switch for the player character model. There are still no footstep sounds and the enemies are still stock assets that don't make a single sound ever. Clearly the work of professionals.
I'm confirming it. They added EXACTLY 37 polygons to Gabe's chin. This, and this alone, justifies its transition from early access to bona fide completed release.
+TimedropStudios Your game doesn't look that amazing but it is certainly unique and not at all bad, so I must say thank you for your effort (both in the making of your game and writing this comment :P)
the not hiding the cursor and locking it to center is probably one of the best indicators of how incompetent the developer is you can have lack of creativity lack of skill knowledge all that but if you cant even manage the cursor properly or even not at all it shows how little effort you put into the game
That "title screen" is very literally the default "game world" that a camera sees when creating a new unity scene. Aka, they very literally created a blank scene, and just added a few buttons...
i just realized that the portal at the end of the levels is the same texture repeated over and over. various tiny portals that look like recolored fireworks, instead of one big portal. not that it was animated.
i think the main difference is that gabe's face is now rendered with a great deal more polygons instead of having the same bumpy aesthetic as his armor and that you can pick weapons up now, instead of being given them at the start of the game. oh, and the title screen has gone from "poorly constructed and not finished" to "poorly constructed and not finished and also there's shitty background music and pictures of gabe newell on there.
I see that the "dev" still thinks that Valve's offices are all part of some enormous space station complex...or maybe this is just what everything looks like on their homeworld and assume that the rest of the galaxy looks the same way.
His body is a ROBOT! That both means its fine that his arm bends that way and also means the Dev was covering up his inability to fix the arm animation.
The memes. They will never stop. They will never falter. They do not feel love, nor regret, nor fear. The memes shall conquer us all. And we shall worship them.
It's been...interesting responding to defenders of this on the work I did for it, especially given it's laden with extremely ambiguous copyright infringement, from songs produced by other people, search engine acquired images and even straight assets lifted from Valve's IP, for "parody" reasons. Regardless, I didn't really think it spent its Early Access time enough. Could do with an improvement or two still.
+r hill I'm, technically, speaking English right now. Regardless, I wanted to keep it vague that I did a video of it myself just before and posted a review. What with self-promo on other people's channels being kinda gross and all. That sort of isn't relevant anymore, since one of the top comments here actually steals my review. Which is quite an odd thing to see btw. So, that's the work I did for it. Hope that helps.
Huh. I'm not used to people phrasing it that way. I'd probably have said work *about* the game. Maybe I'd have said *on* the game, which could have still been misinterpreted. But saying *for* the game seems strange to me, like I'd only say that if I helped make the game, and I guess that's what it looked like to Bug, too.
I was almost hoping that the "Release Half Life-3" button would just give an error sound, as they will never release it. But I guess that level of intellectual depth would be beyond this title.
I realized that I don't exactly look forward to your videos about crappy games, but when they weren't popping up regularly I missed them. Even though each individual one doesn't necessarily leave a strong impression they're great for entertaining yourself when you've got nothing better to do... I know that's kind of damning with faint praise but my point is that they are a net positive for me.
In my head, all the stock Unity assets exist in the same overarching canon; being a horror meta-game wherein you play a modern Sisyphus constantly pushing against terrible early access games that just get worse and more prevalent despite your best efforts.
So good you are back Jim. You were definitely missed by me. As for this video you had me laughing through the whole thing. If there was a magical way where we could have a video released even more often and it was Jim Sterling 24/7 I'd be a very happy man. Thanks for looking out for gaming consumers and being entertaining at the same time. Early Merry Xmas to you and hope things get even better for you in 2016. Oh and just a thought about this game .... Maybe the guy that made it released it in it's current state to make a point about Gabe/Valve/Steam? Too many shitty games on Steam and Gabe Newell should be punished by being forced to live in one of these shitty games.
Someone needs to make the Jimquisition Dance (Squirty Mix). *dubstep drop* "Gaben, Gaben, Gaben!...pounding it...pounding it...HIT THE LEVER!" Sample the Slaughtering Grounds theme for it, mix in some other great stuff. Earn all the Internet points!
You know what Steam has become at this point? It's the new Action 52, you know that really bad set of games for the NES priced at like $200, that the Angry Video Game Nerd looked at. They were all really broken and glitchy, some of them wouldn't even turn on. Yeah that sounds like a correct description of most of the games that come out on steam.
Mmh... man is it that bad when there is an unintentional spiritual successor based on that piece of ultra shit to ever shill on the NES along with the awful amount of shovelware? We are close to coming full circle, are we?
When I look at things like this, I am filled with a certain... horror. Things like this? They were never meant to be good. They were meant to be shit because "LOL I made a shit game!" is apparently funny for some reason and the fact someone would think like that, and actually release a game is baffling to me. Its like going into a fine art gallery, looking at all the classical, lovely painting and then you find someone smearing shit all over a canvas while giggling to themselves about how all artists are stupid. Its like... I look at something that is kinda shit and I can call it art, I can find something worthy in the attempt even if the execution is botched but this? This is some sort of perverse anti-art. I feel like the world is actually a worse place because this exists and it makes me feel dirty in my soul.
Am I the only one who laughed uncontrollably around 4:09 when Jim said "oh, we've got a roll... weeeeeee". Good times, good times. Game looks like shit though, I'm not playing that.
I feel like Steam deliberately let this through to show that they don't care about it and all it's done is make everything worse because a whole bunch of people are going to buy it for lols and give the person who made this trash money. Seriously, Steam. PLEASE care. We all want you to care.
Jim, ( 2:30 ) releasing your game in early access and then bringing it out of early access gives you essentially two releases on steam, which means double the chance to score some dosh because these 3rd rate developers abandon the project for their next "major" release.
I can only imagine a true Gabe Newell simulator would just be Game Dev Tycoon being played extremely poorly.
+Strazdas I may be wrong, but I think the piracy only really comes into play if you pirated the game.
+psycoslegecy I did pirate it before actually playing it (Because I am Satan) But if I remember correctly it is only for pirated copies, I don't think its appeared once since I purchased it
+Lily Peet No you're thinking of Tim Schafer Simulator. Gabe Newell simulator is literally just sitting on your ass counting money
***** Well I actually like the game so I would say it was worth my money :P
+Catastrogue Game Dev Tycoon is actually a fairly good game, it has a score of 96% on Steam, so i guess it's objectively a good game. Certainly worth the money.
I find it hilarious that someone made a game about Gabe Newell on Unity and not Source.
+lradford22 Source is hard, importing assets and scripts off the internet is the way to go for quality games
Very few people have ever seriously used Source for a game other than Valve, the Stanley Parable and other games what ever I don't care creator, and some french company that made a game with electricity in it or something. It's also more complicated than Unity in a lot of ways and doesn't really give you, like, any advantages at all anymore. Hell, the fact that the game was Source is what made me realize Beginner's Guide wasn't even vaguely real about halfway through or wherever the cafe was.
+Mattpoppybros Titanfall uses Source
Rob Nomad That surprises me. It was probably an obstacle to its development, honestly.
Mattpoppybros I'm not sure if they gave any reasoning behind the choice but yeah, in their development diaries they stated multiple times that it brought multiple obstacles.
Frankly I'd be interested in seeing how Valve manages Source2, it'd be nice for them to make it more convenient to use
"release half-life 3" lol. you know whats sad is that when half-life 3 is release it will probably end up like duke nukem forever given how amazingly over-hyped it is.
Oh goody, another dose of Gaben as my lullaby so I could sleep and dream hopping around the magical world of Kojima Production and Star Wars.
+EmperorFaiz han dies
+Ammy Everyone dies.
The left arm uses a right arm aimation xD
+DevilisInside Who does that? How do you fuck up that badly? This is a new level of incompetence.
+DevilisInside i thought it was to do with ik targets fucking up the position of the arm but now i look more its using the exact same animation.
+DevilisInside nah scrape right arm animation we don't need that.
it cost to much money.
I love how this game tried to avoid infringing on any kind of trade mark by called the "E3" the "G3", but it then uses Gabe Newel's name a likeness without his permission.
Just so you know, when this was on greenlight it was the most voted game by Steam users at the time. It just goes to show that you can get any turd on Steam as long as it is "just for the lolz".
This is it, this what gamers want in 2015, we get what we deserve...
It sounds like Calypso from Twisted Metal, gave us our wish, but the wish we didn't want. Those voters wanted a joke game/simulator of Gabe Newell, and that's what you get upon this playthrough...
(slowly clapping)
*congratulations* voters...
You know you're in for a ride when the 3D artist doesn't even know how to manage smoothing groups.
wow so much has changed since early access i think i gotta buy this game now
This is the true game of the year.
+That one Gay Nazi from outer space but is now the damn fiddle master Gabe of the year
Been with you Jim from when you started that the Escapists I watch most of your videos so glad to see you grow thank you for all the laughs
The transition out of Early Access note must've read something along the lines of: "Experiment to take money from suckers a great success - now to move it to a grander scale"
6:15 honestly that whole bit is one of my favorite squirty play moments. just. bye-bye
i'd like to see a John Carmack simulator
focusing on keyboards all day, going through macworld with a strut, all that reclusive programmer's programmer action and finally shooting off to mars in a rocket
....on UnrealEngine4.....
Only 2 weeks until the end of the year, and we still have time for a "Worst game of 2015" contender! What a time to be alive!
This and Time Ramesside are in nomination!
I like how when Jim said "just my friendly reminder of the day" we saw Gabe's smiling face just for a second.
Also did anybody else notice that one part of his armor that kept glitching out. I personally couldn't stop looking at it. >.>
When is a meme not a meme?
+Marquis Forneus When it's a youme?
Or just get the new Apple iMeme.
+A Cameltoe More than the rarest pepes
+Marquis Forneus When it's a jar.
When it is safely contained and no longer harbours the ability to inflict misery or suffering upon large quantities of sentients.
The music that came in at around the 5:00 mark is from a PC game called Fate I think. Or at least incredibly similar.
G3? Where's Joe Satriani? Where's Steve Vai?
hey, the thumbnail still says "early access," if you didn't know.
Another one of those games that were probably a lot more funny as a concept, or a one off joke picture rather than an actual game. Because it turns out when you make it a real game, it outstays it's welcome after about 30 seconds.
the arm's still broken, the the back of the player character model still clips through its armor, and they still haven't found the "smooth shading" switch for the player character model.
There are still no footstep sounds and the enemies are still stock assets that don't make a single sound ever.
Clearly the work of professionals.
Gabe's magical bendy-arm adventure
I'm confirming it. They added EXACTLY 37 polygons to Gabe's chin. This, and this alone, justifies its transition from early access to bona fide completed release.
Great to have you back Jim!
You sho... you should play a great early access game called Megatect©!
People seem to like it even though I sti...Uh... the Developer still needs to finish some core stuff.
He really needs the cash to fund his cocaine addiction.
That actually looks pretty cool. Nice.
+TimedropStudios Your game doesn't look that amazing but it is certainly unique and not at all bad, so I must say thank you for your effort (both in the making of your game and writing this comment :P)
+TimedropStudios You can give yourself a Mysterio fishbowl-helmet so Jim'll be sold.
That trailer needs better framerate though
The key to success is to leech of everyone else's success!
Yeah its pretty awful, its the best I could get outa my ancient GFX card
Gabe's arm is fucked up, but he's smiling at the screen like, "Eh what can ya do?"
the not hiding the cursor and locking it to center is probably one of the best indicators of how incompetent the developer is you can have lack of creativity lack of skill knowledge all that but if you cant even manage the cursor properly or even not at all it shows how little effort you put into the game
Hey Jim, mind if I ask what you use for recording footage?
I came here to this video to help me cheer up, and now I just want to curl up into a ball and wait until the mean greenlight and early access go away.
That "title screen" is very literally the default "game world" that a camera sees when creating a new unity scene. Aka, they very literally created a blank scene, and just added a few buttons...
Low ammo = survival horror right?
What was the hand jibber situation at Gaymer X like? I know you were looking forward to that.
i just realized that the portal at the end of the levels is the same texture repeated over and over. various tiny portals that look like recolored fireworks, instead of one big portal.
not that it was animated.
i think the main difference is that gabe's face is now rendered with a great deal more polygons instead of having the same bumpy aesthetic as his armor and that you can pick weapons up now, instead of being given them at the start of the game.
oh, and the title screen has gone from "poorly constructed and not finished" to "poorly constructed and not finished and also there's shitty background music and pictures of gabe newell on there.
I have Sterlingophobia - the fear of having your game featured on Jim Sterling's channel....
Memes will never stop until everything has been turned into a meme. And we all know, once everything is a meme, nothing is...
Every time I see one of these videos I think, "How can it get any worse?" Well, somehow it ALWAYS does...
From the moment the title screen popped up, I knew we were in for a world of pain.
I see that the "dev" still thinks that Valve's offices are all part of some enormous space station complex...or maybe this is just what everything looks like on their homeworld and assume that the rest of the galaxy looks the same way.
His body is a ROBOT! That both means its fine that his arm bends that way and also means the Dev was covering up his inability to fix the arm animation.
Is it so hard to google 'Unity remove mouse cursor'?
The memes.
They will never stop.
They will never falter.
They do not feel love, nor regret, nor fear.
The memes shall conquer us all.
And we shall worship them.
I have no talent and I must get on Steam.
How can Valve not be at least a little bit concerned over this thing's existence?
needs more memes
glad to see all the work they put into it since early access
Whilst I didn't see much ammo around I did spot the occasional ammo pickup sitting on barrels that were missed. Easily done given the meh detail.
Seems that the UI is just pure bonkers. When Gabe is using UMP submachine gun, in HUD it shows G36 assault rifle.
Is a video an Early Access Squirt if the game played is no longer in early access?
So you don't actually have to shoot anything, just run to the end with a benny hill line of enemies behind you
you know, I wasn't sure if something like this would be memes, but thank God for Jim Sterling for clearing that up.
I think there's a wall specifically reserved for my head nearby.
5:20 this is the exact same fucking map used in air control and galactic hitman. -_-
+knoxklay11 Huh, how funny. Now most of the greenlight and early access games are blending in...
Well, glad to see Gabe's arm is still broken.
Why does Gabe Newell's model not have any vertex smoothing? Is that how it was sold? Why would someone sell a model with no vertex smoothing?
So I wasn't imagining things, the HUD shows a G36C but the 3D gun model is an UMP.
+jonowee "They Didn't Even Care..."
Well... at least there's sound effects when you shoot now. That's a plus, right, maybe?
"The hand is doing things no hand should do."
Regarding the Gabe Newell character model, it seems like the guy who made the model forgot how to apply smooth UV shading in Blender.
Literally made by a 13 year old, or someone with the mind of one.
How can you presume to know what Gaben's arms can do?
LOL the menù background is the one used in the first ERB's Darth Vader vs Hitler
can someone tell me what pack the spike-hand monster is from?
I'm perplexed why Gabe's model is made of quads instead of tris.
It's been...interesting responding to defenders of this on the work I did for it, especially given it's laden with extremely ambiguous copyright infringement, from songs produced by other people, search engine acquired images and even straight assets lifted from Valve's IP, for "parody" reasons.
Regardless, I didn't really think it spent its Early Access time enough. Could do with an improvement or two still.
you developed this game?
+_ Bug Come on man, I might suck, but don't do me like that :(.
+daavpuke Then what did you mean by "the work I did for it?"
+r hill I'm, technically, speaking English right now. Regardless, I wanted to keep it vague that I did a video of it myself just before and posted a review. What with self-promo on other people's channels being kinda gross and all. That sort of isn't relevant anymore, since one of the top comments here actually steals my review. Which is quite an odd thing to see btw.
So, that's the work I did for it. Hope that helps.
Huh. I'm not used to people phrasing it that way. I'd probably have said work *about* the game. Maybe I'd have said *on* the game, which could have still been misinterpreted. But saying *for* the game seems strange to me, like I'd only say that if I helped make the game, and I guess that's what it looked like to Bug, too.
One of the trailers for this game is a slow pan-zoom on a Christmas Gaben.
Just...
Just in case you wondered.
Because you let it, Jim. Because you let it.
And we missed you, bondage man.
4:47 Gabe feels his sins crawling on his back.
I was almost hoping that the "Release Half Life-3" button would just give an error sound, as they will never release it. But I guess that level of intellectual depth would be beyond this title.
So proud of living in Italy right now, extremely proud
Feeling somewhat triggered that the HUD depicts a G36C but the weapon model is a UMP-45.
What did you expect of a crappy "joke" "game".
Welcome back Jim!!
I realized that I don't exactly look forward to your videos about crappy games, but when they weren't popping up regularly I missed them. Even though each individual one doesn't necessarily leave a strong impression they're great for entertaining yourself when you've got nothing better to do... I know that's kind of damning with faint praise but my point is that they are a net positive for me.
Could this possibly be the best game ever? This is where it's at.
This Jim Sterling Vlog was brought to you by GABE NEWELL SIMULATOR
"your a wizard Harry..."
Yes, this is memes, absolutely memes.
well at least we got a little bit of story time with uncle Jim!
In my head, all the stock Unity assets exist in the same overarching canon; being a horror meta-game wherein you play a modern Sisyphus constantly pushing against terrible early access games that just get worse and more prevalent despite your best efforts.
Good to have you back.
this is out of early access?
why did it ever leave alpha?
jim. jim jim..
why are you playing this again
you dont have to punish yourself anymore, your free..
That distorted arm... not even Adam Jenson could do that...
AM I the onlyone who is wondering why they put bandages at the BEGINNING of the level, before you take any damage?
So good you are back Jim. You were definitely missed by me. As for this video you had me laughing through the whole thing. If there was a magical way where we could have a video released even more often and it was Jim Sterling 24/7 I'd be a very happy man. Thanks for looking out for gaming consumers and being entertaining at the same time. Early Merry Xmas to you and hope things get even better for you in 2016.
Oh and just a thought about this game ....
Maybe the guy that made it released it in it's current state to make a point about Gabe/Valve/Steam? Too many shitty games on Steam and Gabe Newell should be punished by being forced to live in one of these shitty games.
Whoa...didn't Jim already do this one or something?
Someone needs to make the Jimquisition Dance (Squirty Mix). *dubstep drop* "Gaben, Gaben, Gaben!...pounding it...pounding it...HIT THE LEVER!" Sample the Slaughtering Grounds theme for it, mix in some other great stuff. Earn all the Internet points!
This game has 1 thing going for it ONE and that is the fact that i find it hilarious that they let out level number 3.
The music from level 4 is stolen from a game called Fate. It's a neat game I loved as a kid and It's sad to see it used like that.
You know what Steam has become at this point? It's the new Action 52, you know that really bad set of games for the NES priced at like $200, that the Angry Video Game Nerd looked at. They were all really broken and glitchy, some of them wouldn't even turn on. Yeah that sounds like a correct description of most of the games that come out on steam.
Mmh... man is it that bad when there is an unintentional spiritual successor based on that piece of ultra shit to ever shill on the NES along with the awful amount of shovelware? We are close to coming full circle, are we?
+Dylan Fields jim sterling new angry video game nerd without being angry.
What happened to level 3?
When I look at things like this, I am filled with a certain... horror. Things like this? They were never meant to be good. They were meant to be shit because "LOL I made a shit game!" is apparently funny for some reason and the fact someone would think like that, and actually release a game is baffling to me. Its like going into a fine art gallery, looking at all the classical, lovely painting and then you find someone smearing shit all over a canvas while giggling to themselves about how all artists are stupid.
Its like... I look at something that is kinda shit and I can call it art, I can find something worthy in the attempt even if the execution is botched but this? This is some sort of perverse anti-art. I feel like the world is actually a worse place because this exists and it makes me feel dirty in my soul.
Ah, Dadaism at it's worst in the indie gaming market. Couldn't they stay on paper art instead of here?
What a lovely thing to come back to after a nice vacation, eh Jim?
g36c icon but the in game model is a ump. Okay.
"They didn't even care"
Am I the only one who laughed uncontrollably around 4:09 when Jim said "oh, we've got a roll... weeeeeee". Good times, good times. Game looks like shit though, I'm not playing that.
Good to have you back jim I missed you too
I feel like Steam deliberately let this through to show that they don't care about it and all it's done is make everything worse because a whole bunch of people are going to buy it for lols and give the person who made this trash money.
Seriously, Steam. PLEASE care. We all want you to care.
Welcome back, Jim!
Jim, ( 2:30 ) releasing your game in early access and then bringing it out of early access gives you essentially two releases on steam, which means double the chance to score some dosh because these 3rd rate developers abandon the project for their next "major" release.